Me, as in I and myself...not Mutant Enemy
The characters of Willow and Tara are property of ME and company. I don’t own jack (or jill) nor do I claim to from Joss or any other officially paid member of his staff. I am simply a gal looking to entertain myself with potential ‘what if’s’ and having some fun. I hope that The Powers That Be will understand. This story so far is pretty PG in my book…it may change as it develops (to a more smutty rating, hopefully!) It’s not in any real time line so please forgive all the injustices I do. I didn’t exactly follow the format of the show…just ideas trickling in my ittle wittle head! Feedback welcome should you love it or should it be a horrific reading experience for anyone.
There were no beta readers and grammatical errors may be present. The wind whipped inside, rustling the loose papers in the room, and extinguishing the candles as it made its presence known. The breathy chill it left on her exposed skin brought goose bumps, but warm hands quickly smoothed them over.
“Baby, do you want me to shut the window?”
“If it doesn’t bother you, I’d like to keep it open a while. I love the fresh, autumn air…well, when it’s more autumny and less windy, chilly and all around annoying…”
Tara turned to her side and faced Willow. “Sure, sweetie, whatever you want. We have blankets and we have each other.”
“Hmmmm…each other. Can’t complain with the snuggles!” Willow turned on her bright smile and wrapped her legs around her lovers, gently entwining them into a tight embrace. She brushed a stray lock of hair behind Tara’s ear and looked deeply into the azure pools with desire and love.
At that moment, another bellowing burst of wind came through the window, sending Willow into an upright position, the sheets clutched to her chest. “OK, over it now! Can’t stand it anymore!” She looked wistfully at Tara with imploring eyes, then back to the window. “Do I have to get up and do it…or can I…??”
“Endus Canop!”
The window slammed shut bringing the room to an eerie stillness. “Thanks, baby.” she said sheepishly. Her eyes showing relief she didn’t have to ask to do it herself. Magic had a way of getting out of hand with her…maybe not at that moment but recurrent moments always lead up to something bigger. She would not lose Tara again and vowed to not use magic the same way. Not for power. Not for abuse.
“My pleasure, even though I don’t normally practice by those measures” and with a pause and a slow, crooked smile Tara added, “but I’m with you, and getting out of bed is not on my priority list.” She pulled Willow down back into the sheets and snuggled back up to the soft, silken body, which eagerly embraced her in return.
With an outstretched hand, and under the muffled command of a very turned-on witch, “Ignitus” was uttered and the candle flames were again dancing and licking in their holders.
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Their morning started like most mornings. Sleepy yawns and snuggles before the alarm clock went off. Gentle back rubs and caresses, to which lead to deepening snuggles, to which then usually lead to deeper kissing. Despite morning breath and all, neither could get enough of each other. Tara looked radiant in the morning. Willow, on the other hand, always felt she looked tired and washed out. Abusing the magicks took its toll on her body. But Tara really only saw the best side of Willow. She was always forgiving and generous of her heart, her body, and her affections. If Tara thought Willow was beautiful, it was because Tara made Willow beautiful.
“Mmmmm, morning, baby” purred the honey-haired vixen. “You ready to get up? I mean, I’m not but I know you’ve got classes in a while and while I may be a sex kitten, I’m afraid it’s not enough to keep you here.”
“Baby, you know if it weren’t for the exam, I would so be here with you.” Willow gave her usual elfin grin before leaning in towards another less than chaste kiss. “But Professor Demon-Doofus, A.K.A “I suck 101 – How to fall into a coma in under 10 seconds”, and although that might be a given sittin’ here on Hellmouth, you know, him being a less than stellar professor and all…and, you know, what’s with the choosing to give our finals in oral form anyway cuz I tend to get a bit sweaty when I hafta get up in front of people I don’t know…"
"Willow."
"Well, I must be fully prepared cuz crash and burning don’t come to the faint of heart.”
“Willow, breathe….and I think you’ll do fine. You always were good…um…orally.”
“Tara!”
After ensuing giggles and pillow play fighting, they finally both drug themselves up to ready for their day.
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The bullet ripped through the window and red splattered the walls, the floor, and lastly, her shirt. Blood everywhere…the precious life force of Tara seeping into the carpeting as she collapsed upon it.
“TARA! Baby! Wake up! Baby…baby! Please!! Wake up! No! No! NO!!!!”
Dark, encircling clouds of electric blue filled the room, a gaseous and ominous mixture of magic and death permeated with each breath Willow took.
“I call upon thee Osiris! Do of my will!”
Willow knew there was nothing to be done. She knew summoning the God was fruitless and dangerous. Magic could only work upon those who were killed by magical forces. This was a natural death…not that Tara’s death was by any means natural. What is natural about a bullet being ripped through the heart? The bullet did more damage to Willow’s heart.
In a haste of rage, torment and bewilderment, Willow performed a powerful transportation spell. It was beyond powerful…it was beyond anything done before. She released her soul, her all, to provide the energy needed for this task. She didn’t care if it killed her…for what had she to lose anymore? She just wanted out of here, beyond memories and time.
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The sun shone brightly overhead…the smell of dew and warm grass filled her senses as she lay on her back, gazing upward at the clouds.
She slowly sat up, slightly dazed and dizzy, hands shielding her eyes from the glaring sun.
The birds sang loudly in the surrounding trees but the air was strangely silent. Where was she? She didn’t remember being here before…where was before? And where is here?
“Your shirt.” she softly whispered. Why had she said that?
Tara stood up slowly, taking in the scenery, completely unfamiliar in her mind.
Rationality set in. She scanned quickly looking for Willow, or for anything familiar. Fear and panic quickly rose in her chest.
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Willow, her heart careening like a pebble tumbling downstream, had replayed Tara’s death over and over, unable to quell the nightmare. The jarring effects of astral-traveling violently shook her along each winding and bending path, like a maze of torrential rivers, cresting and crashing into one another where they met. This time it was painful…yet she welcomed it. Anything was better than feeling the searing pain in her heart where Tara fell…where Tara died in her arms. Through blinding light to desolate darkness, from slow agonizing burns to spinning and spiraling out of control, each turn enfolded her, ensnaring her to its ethereal chain, all these meaningless rivers of endless and tangled dimensions. She didn’t care. She didn’t want out.
Until….
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Her breath caught in her throat as she spotted an article of clothing lying in tatters a few feet away. A chill ran through her warm flesh.
“Oh God…”
It was the torn remains of a blouse. A white blouse with spatters of blood. Tara reached to pick it up. As she touched it, the memories washed over her like a wave.
The white-hot trail of an entry wound. Making love with Willow. Making up with Willow. Her shirt sprayed with blood. Darkness enveloping…
“Your shirt.” Again, she whispered the words, barely able to believe the truth.
She had died. She felt it inside her as much as she felt the warmth of the sun on her skin. But was this heaven? She didn’t feel the way she thought one might feel when in a place of peace. She felt fear, and nausea, and didn’t recognize where she was, but recognized the bloodied shirt she held in her hands was Willow’s…and the blood on it was her own. She needed answers. There was no logic to this aside from the persistent and chilling fact she might be dead. Tara slumped to the ground, hot tears stinging behind her eyes.
As she looked down on herself, she noticed her own clothing was as torn and shredded as the fabric in her hands. She saw the hole in her shirt. She felt for a wound. There was none. She’d rather be dead in Willow’s arms than be here, wherever here was and alone. The manner in which she arrived was violent judging from the effects of her clothing and the deepening red marks on her skin. There was nothing left to do but find some answers, some truth. She’d do a spell…but oh god...where was Willow? She had to clear her mind.
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Within the blackness she caught a glimpse… a quick one but it was enough. Through the weaving astral pathways she saw her standing alone, in brilliant light…and what…what was she holding in her hand? Images spun in her mind. It was time. Time to find her lover again. She focused her thoughts, her will towards the portal. It pulled…it hurt, a vicious tugging at her skin. The light burned her eyes and it was moving closer and closer. Willow instinctively flung her hands up over her face.
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“Aradia, here my words.
I ask thee to guide my way
Show me answers as they may
I heed the strength of sight unseen
Wash my thoughts of words unclean.”
A warm wind swept through the grass. The sounds around her grew silent.
The air shimmered, the wind whipped at her hair, and everything became a blur of trees, sky and ground. She opened her eyes, waves of nausea gripping her stomach. A thin veil had shrouded her vision, forming a mist, and she knew something heard her plea. She must be somewhere tangible. This wasn’t a dream to which she’d gladly wake up from. There was a shape taking form through the mist. The shape solidified before her, a most welcoming sight, and then…there they were… the familiar emerald green eyes looking back…yes, was it? It was her Willow!
She gasped, shock and relief flooding her senses and her eyes, unable to call out or speak.
“Tara!” Willow was bound in the mist, unable to fully emerge from the portal. “Damn it, hurry up!” Impatience held her captive as she eventually managed to steady one foot on solid ground, still semi-trapped by the energy of the portal. The effects were temporarily binding. She watched as Tara cautiously ventured towards her instead. Those eyes. Yes, those were the same eyes!
“Willow?” Tara whispered, still disbelieving her own eyes.
“Tara! Oh God. I found you! I was… I was out of my mind…and then I saw you here…” Willow stopped cold, afraid she was delusional from the magicks. “Is it…is it…you, Baby? Is this… are you?” She tentatively reached forward to touch the shape of the woman standing in front of her. The form was solid, breathing and real. With shaking fingers she grasped Tara’s hand, relieved the hand was warm and soft. Tara leaned in to embrace in a deep hug, feeling their strong connection surge between them, and just as relieved Willow wasn’t an illusion. The mists of the vanished portal enveloped them both.
“Tara…” Willow took a deep breath. One hand clutched at Tara’s for dear life and the other flailed nervously. “Tara, I know this is going to sound crazy, as in what else is new, I know, but you were… shot…and I don’t know who did this…but you died in…in our room, in front of me, a..a and I tried to bring you back but…”
“I know, I mean, I felt it. I remembered when I…when I picked this up.” She held up the remains of the bloodied fabric. “This is yours. That’s my blood. I remember…vaguely. But…but we…here you are…and I called…and the portal…and that’s when you came.” Tara looked around nervously. “A..and exactly where is here, Willow?”
Willow couldn’t take her eyes from the shirt in Tara’s hand.
“Well, I don’t know just yet”, she replied softly, still trying to shake off the effects of the spell and the fresh memories of her beloved dying in what seemed like moments ago. It was all too much to comprehend. “I…well, I went nuts with the you dying factor and I…I…cast a teleportation spell to...to...to lose myself so I wouldn’t go two hairs shy of crazy because I felt it inside me, Tara…deep inside…a..a..and it frightened me what I might do…so I...I wished myself…” she grasped for the right words. “I wanted to disappear. I couldn’t save you...and I just wanted you back. That’s all I could think of…was to somehow…”
Her sentence trailed off intelligibly. The tears began a downward descent. Tara stepped in closer, gently wiping them away with the pads of her thumbs.
“Sweetie, it’s me, and I’m r…really here with you…and I’m so happy to be here with you than dead back there but we’ve got to find some answers. W..w. .we’ve got to find out where we are and how to get back.”
“Tara, going back means…it means that home is where you’re not anymore. You were killed a..and I can’t go back to that.”
They looked at each other knowing words didn’t need to be spoken. Much had happened so quickly and the sight of the other was enough to carry them forward, to take the next step in figuring out what to do. Tara nodded in understanding. She really didn’t want to be without Willow either. They had called out, and whatever forms of magic they used, in their moments of need, they had found one another. They would somehow always find each other.
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More to come shortly
Edited by: VicariousSmoochies at: 7/6/03 10:48 am
And you put all the highs and lows into it. I'm curious as to 'where' they are but I'm sure you'll fill that in quite nicely.
falling into threads
There were no beta readers and grammatical errors may be present. 
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