12 step support for the spoiler-free

[Hanki]

hehee, so that's what the 12 steps were, the thought did actually stumble across my mind at some point. quickly forgotten of course. the dancing girls distracted me

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Hannah's Home -- My Collective Creative Crap

"Thank you Professor Higgins, after one lesson I feel I can speak perfectly."

[Pixie]

Whew! Wolfie, thanks for the clarification!! I was able to resist the temptation and just go to bed, but this was a perfect post to get up to. I have now definitely accomplished step 12. I'll admit, I didn't know what the frilly heck you were talking about for a few of the steps, but my confusion was accompanied by large bushels of mirth. I can handle deferance to the Captain, but I wonder what the Field Marshall will do to me if I show too much devotion. And in terms of the hugs, sadly, my one BtVS friend is a)not quite as into W/T as I am and b)not within reach. So, 2 questions: Do virtual hugs count? Anyone wanna give me one?

[Dr.G]

And then there is step 13: You go and read the wildfeed, it will save you 12 steps next time.

[Katharyn]

quote:

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Originally posted by Wolfie:
10: Deference and much devotion to the Captain. Not to mention hugs (did I mention hugs? They are vital).

Note: Should hands be allowed to find new places during hugs?

---

As is my way I shall free you all from the burden of item ten on the manifesto. Leave that all to me and find yourself lots of dancing girls...

And as for new places? Well there are alot of "traditional" places that are quite fun too. Well they are traditional now... see above note re item ten.

Katharyn.

*Extricating myself from the Captain long enough to send Pixie the requested hug...*

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You hear that baby?quote:

[Pixie]

quote:

---

Originally posted by Katharyn:
.

*Extricating myself from the Captain long enough to send Pixie the requested hug...*

---

Thanks Katharyn. I needed that. Uh Katharyn...Hands!quote:

[supermus]

Being strong and not reading the wildfeed! Yay for me! I need a hug. Oh and you don't need to torture me, I'll tell you. I was going to create a foo grenade that detonated when it got after being away from spoilers, so that a spoiled kitty could walk here with spoilers in hand, plant the bomb, walk away, and it would explode. Ingenious, isn't it. But I decided to make peace, not war, and instead throw all of your foo weaponry to the bottom of the sea.

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"You made a bear! Undo it! Undo it!"
"Good bye to you/Goodbye to everything that I knew"

[This message has been edited by supermus (edited February 11, 2002).]

[Forrister]

I believe that hugs all round are in order. For some reason (no names will be mentioned) I seem to have been neglecting my beloved crew. So for this shore leave I am devoting myself to crew morale and welfare.

To this end (and on advice) I am holding a caberet style show in a few days. All crew members are invited to put together acts for the entertainment of all. My contribution will be a rousing number involving a chorus line of dancing girls. Please - let me know what you come up with.

Now - to deal with our stowaway. You have been very foolish. You would have been very welcome here as a part of the crew - no need to stow away. Anyhow - now that you are out of hiding I am issuing you a uniform and assigning you better quarters. Now - off to shore leave with the rest of the crew.

Nullum magnum ingenium sine mixtura dementiae fuit.
(There has not been any great talent without an element of madness.)

[Wolfie]

Umm, supermus? I'm not sure throwing all our hard-baked foomunition to the bottom of the sea warrents a hug. A spanking from the Captain, possibly, assuming she can reach you from the heady confines of the Field Marshall's gropings!

Anyway, Pixie, my dear, there's a hug winging it's way to you right now - hope that helps! Oh, and I don't know what the frilly heck I'm on about most of the time, too, but it's fun, anyway.

And I thumb my nose and make farty noises at your wildfeed, Garfield - I throw squeaky crocodiles and half-chewed, soggy hide bones at you (and you won't want that - they stick to clothing) in contempt of your wildfeed. We have simpler pleasures - like dancing girls in grass skirts, and many, many hugs, so there (You could come and play, if you were good, but no, you have to try to sully us with nasty, corrosive spoiled-things)

Edited to add: And lo, and behold, our illustrious commander appears! Greetings, fair one, and aren't you letting that rapscallion off a little lightly? Huh! In my day there'd be at least a little tied-to-a-gun-emplacement-and-tickled-with-feathers. Ah, well, obviously liberalism rules here.

Well, I would look forward greatly to your act with dancing girls. Will we be able to expect your leading them from the front? *waggles eyebrows expectantly*

For my own act, I will strap on the ole guitar, and give you a rendition of my Song for Kitties ("Blueprint"), followed by "The Girl in the Tigger Outfit and the Nike Shoes", in honour of Aly (who inspired the song), followed by a cover of "Willow", by JJ72, 'cause it's just about the cutest song I have heard in a long while, and will make you all go dreamy and say "aaahhhhhhhh, how sweet". How's that?

For an encore, I shall be requiring assistance in singing "Dirty Love" by Frank Zappa. Volunteers ..?
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I am the sunlight on the sides of houses.

[This message has been edited by Wolfie (edited February 12, 2002).]

[This message has been edited by Wolfie (edited February 12, 2002).]

[Hanki]

yay dancing girls. *does the dance of joy*

i'll perform a couple of songs if you want, with my guitar. erm... i'll play a couple of michelle branch and one or two of my own. i advise every shipmember to find some earplugs.

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Hannah's Home -- My Collective Creative Crap

"Thank you Professor Higgins, after one lesson I feel I can speak perfectly."

[Pixie]

Ooh, a cabaret show!!! How fun! Uh, oh, I don't think I have much talent, but I can clap and woo hoo and cheer and ogle with the best of 'em!

Wait, I think I do have an act, but this requires some explanation. I work at a Barnes & Noble bookstore, in the children's section, one day a week during the school year and full time during the summer. I spent part of my shift last Saturday ordering Passover books. I came across one called "Matzah Man". Needless to say, (I hope other kitties can see where I'm going. Please let me not be the only one!) I spent the rest of my shift singing "Matzah, matzah man. I want to be...a matzah man." Fortunately, a few other dignified B & N employees (Jewish and not) quickly saw the funny and joined me. So, this may become a (very short) act.

Wolfie, thanks for the hugs!!

[drlloyd11]

Is there any irony that I started this thread and I am spoiled for the next 6 eps?
Its like I went from being a non drinker to a liquor salesman!

[Wolfie]

drlloyd; how the mighty have fallen. I will hang my head in a minutes silence ...

Right, enough of that - I need more dancing girls! Girls! Girls!

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I am the sunlight on the sides of houses.

[This message has been edited by Wolfie (edited February 12, 2002).]

[Katharyn]

quote:

---

Originally posted by Wolfie:
A spanking from the Captain, possibly, assuming she can reach you from the heady confines of the Field Marshall's gropings!

---

I always let go for a spanking.

quote:

---

Huh! In my day there'd be at least a little tied-to-a-gun-emplacement-and-tickled-with-feathers. Ah, well, obviously liberalism rules here.

---

Aaah when I was a midshipman... I was a private... oh well. Wrong service.

quote:

---

Well, I would look forward greatly to your act with dancing girls. Will we be able to expect your leading them from the front? *waggles eyebrows expectantly*

---

Handing the captain some big industrial strength panties for ther performance. What you say?! Eyes Only Material!

The show should be fun... I am planning something with vegetables, though the Captain keeps offering my her home made whips...

Katharyn

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You hear that baby?

[This message has been edited by Katharyn (edited February 12, 2002).]quote:quote:quote:

[shellybean]

Someone help me be spoiler free! I've been a spoiler addict for 2 years! HELP!

[Charlie]

Wolfie, from one Manics fan to another, can I put in a request for a lil boppy number from the Valley Boys?? I'll even help. I can stand in the background and jump up and down manically (geddit?)... or I could break a guitar... my brother will lend me one of his old baby ones. Pleeeeeease?! Plus, I'm sure you'd look superdooper in a leopard print skirt and feather boa, both of which I can supply (yes, we used to dress for the gigs...)!

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"Je dois partir maintenant parce que ma grandmere est flambé..."
- Eddie 'covered in beeeees!' Izzard

[tommo]

quote:

---

Originally posted by Wolfie:
5: The beaten and bloody corpse of Barry Cryer.

---

Wolfie, there's nothing wrong with Barry Cryer. If you're like, over sixty. He's a walking advert for the benefits of reanimation.

And Garfield? Don't tease. Bad boy.

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Sweetie...I'm a fag.quote:

[Wolfie]

Well, ignoring the even ironic attempt at letting Barry Cryer go, I shall move swiftly on to Manic's stuff:

Actually listening to The Holy Bible as I type (my personal fav), although nothing too boppy from that one. Used to do This is Yesterday with an old band, though.

Anyway, I could do Design For Life. Or Motorcycle Emptiness. Or Kevin Carter. Or Australia. Or La Tristesse Durera. And I will wear a feather boa, a dress and knee socks, in deference to the Nickster. I might not pogo, though - could get gruesome, in a dress an' all.

And I'm looking forward to the vegetable show, Katharyn. *waggles eyebrows*.

Edited to add: Actually looking at the booklet with Gold against the Soul - lots of people go on about how beautiful Richie and Nicky were/are, etc, but spare a though for Mr Bradfield - before he got all pied-out, he was stunning, in a brutish kind of way - Che beard an' all.
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I am the sunlight on the sides of houses.

[This message has been edited by Wolfie (edited February 13, 2002).]

[Hanki]

quote:

---

Originally posted by shellybean:
Someone help me be spoiler free! I've been a spoiler addict for 2 years! HELP!

---

Red Alert Crew!

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Hannah's Home -- My Collective Creative Crap

"Thank you Professor Higgins, after one lesson I feel I can speak perfectly."quote:

[Wolfie]

I hear a few well-oiled dancing girls are good for withdrawl.

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I am the sunlight on the sides of houses.

[Katharyn]

quote:

---

Originally posted by shellybean:
Someone help me be spoiler free! I've been a spoiler addict for 2 years! HELP!

---

In all seriousness shellybean I can only suggest that you give this way of life a chance... beyond whatever spoilers you are already exposed to and try watching an ep cold. If you like it... then stick with us. We'll take you to the cabaret...

*whipping out a lettuce*

Katharyn

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You hear that baby?quote:

[Forrister]

800 posts and still going spoiler free !!!! woo hoo!!!

This is cause for much celebration, so there will be luxury rations for all the crew (and visitors), and a slap up party!!!

[Goes off behind a palm tree with Wolfie. Mutter, mutter ... caberet ... mumble ... tuxedo ... mutter mutter rhubarb ... top hat and cane ... mumble mumble ... DANCING GIRLS!!!!!!]

Usque Comissare!
(Party on!)

[Charlie]

Thoroughly agree about Mr Bradfield, honey. I have a poster of him, arms behind his head, top off, stretched out on a chair and... oh, my God! Body to die for!! And I'm gay!!! He shouldn't have given up the running, he really shouldn't.

I agree that THB, though one of the best albums like ever, is possibly not the best album to pick your caberet number from. My vote would be for Motorcyle Emptiness, nice and epic. Actually, you could maybe do Faster... that's always fun to do a lil pogoing to.

*runs off to dig out feather boa and Suicide Babes shirt*

Edited cos I'm a muppet...
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"Je dois partir maintenant parce que ma grandmere est flambé..."
- Eddie 'covered in beeeees!' Izzard

[This message has been edited by Charlie (edited February 14, 2002).]

[Wolfie]

Ta-daaa! Don't know why, but I just had to say that. I'm very, very tired, you know, but too full of toast and corn flakes to go to bed yet. Just got back from a rehearsal. Boy, do my fingers hurt. Blues is a killer.

By the way, Forrister - mumble mumble bah! anywmmm mumble brum mumble mumble enormous *gestures emphatically* and blah blah mumble, of course, I was really, very, very drunk at the time ...

Oh, and tuxedo's, definitely - I look sassy in a tux. With a wing collar and all. Then I can stumble around, Martini in hand, going "ah, I say -" and fall down a lot. Hysterical, bloody marvellous.

Edited to add: Yeah, Faster is a great song. Kind of difficult to sing, though:

I am an architect - they call me a butcher
I am a pioneer - they call me primative
I am purity - they call me perverted
Holding you is blah flim whattheHellishesinginghere?
Sorry, the lyrics are down stairs!
I'm not sure I could carry that one off.
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I am the sunlight on the sides of houses.

[This message has been edited by Wolfie (edited February 13, 2002).]

[Katharyn]

Okay down to the practical stuff.

Unless anyone has any objections the performance of this Cabaret will occur on Friday 22nd Feb and all are invited... "Cabaret Day."

Rehearsals are wherever you can find somewhere to carry out your act. Not all rehearsals can be in the dancing girls huts for obvious reasons of space.

There will be one of the "infamous" power circles prior to the kick off as led by our honoured (and lovely) Captain - who being in Oz gets to the 22nd earlier than the rest of us and can lead the charge.

By the way anyone performing mime as a major component of their act will be summarily turfed off the boat. If you all choose to perform mime I will turf myself off the boat.

Now let's get to it!

Kathayrn

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You hear that baby?

[Wolfie]

*waves hands around, with a supercilious look on face*

Look, ma, I'm miming!

Well, the costume is sorted, the songs chosen, the guitar restrung and the amp on and humming (there's nothing like 100 watts of raw tube power to get the old juices running). Practicing my jumps now.

I have an idea for an end-of-show-everyone-join-in-extravaganza: The Time warp. Waddya think?

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I am the sunlight on the sides of houses.

[Katharyn]

quote:

---

Originally posted by Wolfie:
*waves hands around, with a supercilious look on face*

Look, ma, I'm miming!

---

*Splash as Wolfie hits the water...*

Don't say I didn't warn you.

*Throws Wolfie a line.*

Time Warp? Just so long as I can be Magenta...

Katharyn

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You hear that baby?quote:

[Hanki]

can i be columbia? do the whole tap dance thingy? hehee. i love that. it rules.

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Hannah's Home -- My Collective Creative Crap

"Thank you Professor Higgins, after one lesson I feel I can speak perfectly."

[wolfwife]

Oooooooooohhhhhhhh a cabaret *eyes wide and mouth smiley with anticipation*... can I play?

Let me think, what can I do?? um...I mean there must be something?? um...ooh ooh I can juggle...sorta! Ooh and I can sing... kinda! Oh and I could probably manage the nipple tassle twirling thing with a little practice with my co-ordination ... on second thoughts perhaps not!

Um maybe I could just bake endless nummy chocolate laden treats for all??

[Charlie]

*staggers onto deck laden with juggling balls, a chicken, microphones, flaming hoops, several mewing kittens and a large magician’s box*

Hey, wolfwife, I found some juggling balls for you (oh, and welcome to th’ board, Sharon! And yes please to the chocolatey treats )… and I think the kittens were meant to be for the Captain, but I got muddled… Oh well.

OK, I have been practising long and hard and shall be performing a series of incredible, astounding, jaw-droppingly fuddlesome magical illusions!!!! But I shall need a assistant, who is gorgeous, comes complete with sparkly oufit and preferably looks nothing like Debbie McGee (and I hasten to add that I look nothing like Paul Daniels before some pillock asks). Hands up, any volunteers, or else I’m volunteering supermus as punishment(?) for stowing away and spying…

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"Je dois partir maintenant parce que ma grandmere est flambé..."
- Eddie 'covered in beeeees!' Izzard

[Wolfie]

Oh, gawd, why did I mime? My epaulettes are all droopy. Flip.

Charlie, will there be any knife-throwing? 'cause if there is, then I, for one, won't be volunteering ...

*fits blindfold on S, and whispers*

Now, don't worry, darling, I believe Charlie's a very good aim - I hear she only lacerated, rather than actually killed her last knife-throwee ...

I've just been called a git. *rolls eyes*. No idea why. Seemed perfectly reasonable to me. Maybe I should stop, while ahead.

*Sits back, and waites expectantly for the nipple tassles*

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I am the sunlight on the sides of houses.