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Is This Love? (This is Love)

Willow and Tara live happy together in a place untouched by Mutant Enemy. This is a forum for Willow and Tara Fan Fiction (i.e. fan fiction, top 10s, etc...) Please read the content advisories on individual stories, read at your own discretion.

Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby madwriter » Tue Feb 10, 2009 5:21 pm

Chapter 4: How The Eskimos Kiss



Willow awoke in silvery moonlight. Her eyes opened to the pretty little body in front of her, staring back at her with the sky in the depths of her eyes.


“Restless Willow, you even wake up in your sleep,” Tara leaned against the wall opposite Willow’s bed, her cool eyes penetrating Willow’s fevered form.


“What’re you saying gypsy girl?” The redhead’s voice was low; she was just waking to the world.


Tara wore a layered skirt that fell in waves down to her thighs. It was the kind of garment meant to be bunched up in your hands, pushed up to reveal what the fabric only hinted at. Her blouse hung thin and loose on her body; it wouldn’t be too hard to rip…y’know, if anyone was into that particular sort of a thing.


“When it comes time to love me are you going to be too afraid?” She seemed vulnerable and small.


“I don’t want to think about that now,” there was a soft rustling as Willow departed hastily from the bed. The blonde was on the move, opening doors Willow didn’t remember her house having. “Slow down for me,” she yawned, running after the ethereal figure.


They were in Sunnydale Theatre’s arcade again when Willow caught her. She felt that they were just two spirits intertwined in the night, in some eternal night.


“Are you going to show me how to play Willow? Or are you done playing?” Her voice sounded so soft and seductive to Willow.


They were the only two that existed in this silvery old cinema. “You know I really liked showing you,” she held the blonde just like before, breathing deep into the space between her neck and shoulder, “It feels wonderful holding each other like this.”


“Shouldn’t you be wondering why?”


“I don’t want to think right now, although not thinking’s a hard thing to do.” Tara turned around in her arms and Willow felt every soft part of her body. She took the challenging grin as an offering and kissed the lips that formed such soft and provoking words, hard.


Their kisses dizzied her like the time her parents let her have a glass of wine as a young, gleeful kid. They hung like that, outside of time and space, as just two souls on the precipice of their consummate meeting.


She should’ve known it was too good.


SDROCK is back this lovely Monday morning. For those of you just waking, welcome to the land of the alive. Here’s your daily dose of rock in the morning.


She woke woozy, a buzzing in her head and an uncomfortable stickiness in her pajama bottoms. The blinding sunshine and the chorus to Black Hole Sun attacking her waking senses, she immediately sank back into the sheets like a young child contemplating faking sick today. What’s wrong with me? What’s happening to my heart?


She tried to stare into her chest but just ended up cracking her stiff neck. After a deep sigh, she still did not want to get up and meet the day. Last night had brought her a torrent of new emotions. In fact, every day that she knew Tara seemed to add weights to her heart, ‘til it was laden with emotion and when the girl was in her company it was the exact opposite. Her heart seemed to almost soar, exultant, as far away as Andromeda maybe. Certainly it went off into new worlds, light as a cloud.


She thought back to last night at the Bronze.


After dancing with Faith, the girl had danced with Xander, and finally, blushing, had asked Willow to dance. And how good she could move! Her curvy form whirling in Willow’s arms, pressed almost completely against her, only grazing her lap at strategic moments that made Willow blush and sweat and breath too hard against Tara’s cheek and, God please, don’t let her hear my heart beat.


And then it was over and they could only hold there for that holy moment when they were centimeters away from a kiss, their arms still around each other, and gravity pulling them almost close enough to—


Until the moment that Willow turned away, eyes wide and frightened. Tara ducking her head, embarrassed and guilty. The others noticing, saying nothing. And the evening ended with that, Buffy walking Xander home, Faith walking Tara home, Willow biting her lip to stop her own protest. It’s not like I could protect her myself.


Tara as always so attuned to Willow’s moods pulled the girl aside with a soft hand at her wrist, pulling her into a corner by the bar’s counter. For a second Willow entertained the fantasy that she was being led into a passionate make-out session. She mentally flogged herself immediately afterwards.


The blonde grabbed Willow’s hand in her own and turned it palm up. She grabbed a pen from the counter and wrote the number 143 on the pale skin. “T-That’s my locker number, in case you ever want to m-meet up, I um, I’m usually early…y’know…if, if you want to.”


“Yeah sure! We can meet up tomorrow in the morning. I’m usually early too; usually I just stay up in the library reading or making new, y’know computer programs to make my um, study sessions more efficient and…wow how lonely and pathetic do I sound right now?”


“On a scale of one to ten? A seven maybe?” Tara teased her, “I um, I’m usually in a dark corner writing in my little n-notebook and probably raising more than a few doubts as to my mental stability.”


She’s always making me feel good, Willow realized she was gazing a little too deeply into the blue, but it’s so easy to get lost, and quickly looked away, “So um, it’s a date tomorrow? I-I mean…well, you know what I mean.”


“Yes, Willow, we all know what you mean,” like a bullet, Faith shot into their space, slinging an arm around Tara’s shoulder, “Let’s go, T! Everyone with a paternal figure at home has got to go!”


And Tara was gone, taken in the gust of raw energy that is Faith Lehane, yelling, “S-see you tomorrow Will!” from behind her shoulder, her white-blonde locks waving behind her.


She brought her bad mood into the van and it filled the small space. Driving home, Oz had been even quieter than usual, or rather; his silence seemed like a loaded one. She felt too hopeless to care, and it made her feel worse as didn’t that just make her the worst girlfriend in the world? To be so selfish as to not care because of some inexplicable jealousy over a girl Willow hardly really knew at all, but know so well.


Their kiss goodbye had been a chaste one, and she had neither given nor really received it. It saddened her, but what almost made her cry was the fact that the only reason she was getting up today was her date with Tara. All I want is a little guidance, oh God.


~~


Leo Dubois sat nursing his coffee, two plates overwrought with breakfast foods in front of him, “Tara! I see icicles forming on your pancakes, baby!”


Still no answer. She never was the type of girl to spend an hour and a half in front of a mirror, but then there was that Willow girl she fancied now. “Jesus, it’s been two days. Save the mascara for when you’re at least near third base for Christ’s sake.”


“What’s that mumbling over there?” Finally the girl emerged from her room, wearing a long pink skirt and a white blouse, her hair done up to fall in wisps about her face; she looked like Venus Herself.


“Whoa, whoa, miss. I believe you missed two very important buttons on that there blouse, hmm?”


“Let me have a little excitement every now and then, Leo. This is the sluttiest thing I do,” she sat and started to pick at her food as she checked her watch.


The man laughed throatily and ate voraciously now that Tara had joined him, “And how did your date go?”


Tara frowned almost wistfully, “No, n-no date. She has an um boyfriend.”


The man rubbed his as of yet unshaven face, “An um boyfriend eh? Well, I wouldn’t worry about that. An um boyfriend is nothing at all like a real boyfriend.”


The girl only shrugged, knowing better than to hope for something so impossible, girls like that weren’t meant for me. “She’s so sweet. I mean, even if we end up as just f-f-friends…”


“Just friends?” Leo looked at her curiously, “That’s quitter talk missy, and I’ll have none of it!”


“She’s straight though,” the girl persisted, with big sad eyes.


“Tara, trust me. Being a cop in this town…I’ve seen stranger things than a supposedly straight person finding their inner twists and turns, all right?”


She nodded though her mind was already turning to something else, “I keep hearing this town this and this town that. Is there something going in Sunnydale, Leo?”


He nodded solemnly, “I reckon, yeah. You just be real careful all right? Even if you think you can trust someone--”


“I-I w-will.”


~~

She hoped she wouldn’t be too early to meet Tara. She felt nervous as she walked through the nearly empty halls of Sunnydale High; she thought she’d taken a longer time getting ready.


It certainly felt like a lifetime, picking through her clothes, trying on different hats or parting her hair this way or that, would Tara like a girl in bright red overalls?


“Damn, Red, why you here so early?”


Ah, there’s nothing quite like having your reverie broken by that Bostonian accent.


“Why are you here so early?” She shot back, nice comeback, Rosenberg.


The brunette shrugged leisurely, falling into step next to Willow, “General mischief. I haven’t even gone to bed yet, to tell ya the truth.”


“I wouldn’t have noticed seeing as you wear the same outfit every single day. Are a white tank and leather pants the bad girl uniform now?”


“Nah, I got lucky in this here institution of pretty low learning last night.” And she winked, teasingly.


Willow lunged at her without a thought, grabbing her by the collar, “You better not have hurt Tara after you left. You better have taken her straight home like you said!”


The dark slayer batted the girl’s hand off, careful to be gentle about it, “It wasn’t with your girl, Red, relax. Don’t stretch out my tank in your crazy jealous rages.”


Emerald eyes rolled playfully, relieved now, “Like I could. Your boobs already stretched it out as far as it could go. The center cannot hold anymore.”


“Been noticing eh?” She laughed throatily, “Psh! The center cannot hold? You’re such a fucking nerd, Red.”


“And you read at a seventh grade level,” she shot back quickly.


“Ah, those tests don’t mean shit.”


“Right,” she responded dryly, “By the way, is there an actual reason you’re stalking me, or do I just have a cute tushie?”


“You get funnier every day, Red,” she shook her head fondly, “I actually wanted to talk to you about T.”


“I hate how you’re calling her that now…” Her grumble was low enough to be easily missed.


But Faith hadn’t missed it, “So I was thinking, maybe we should fess up to T about the Hellmouth and all. Not that I consider myself one of you Scrappy-Doo’s or whatever, but if T’s living in Sunnydale and you want to call yourself her friend you should at least let her know everything that goes on. It’d be safer than not knowing, even if she freaks.”


“I don’t know. She might be safer if I kept her out of it, plus I don’t want her thinking I’m some freak and never wanting to see me again.”


“Yeah,” Faith drawled, “Because the words I save the world on a nearly daily basis never got anyone any pussy.”


“Look, I’ll think about it,” Willow said resolutely, “But I don’t want Tara in danger, understand? If that means lying about Scoobie stuff then--”


“She’s a big girl, okay?” Faith told her, starting to part ways with Willow at a crossroads in the hallway, “Just think about it.”

~~

Tara leaned meekly on her red locker, her books cradled tightly to her chest, as if it could contain the shuttling of her heart at the sight of Willow making her way over to her, enamored and shy.


For a split second, Willow didn’t know what she should do, but at the sight of the girl waiting there for her so sweetly she felt her heart contract then stretch and grow bigger, and through her nervousness leaned in to give her cheek a kiss.


Tara’s pink lips formed a surprised little “o.” Her eyes widened almost comically.


Blushing, Willow told her, “That’s how Spaniards say hello, see uh, Spanish is my first period class so I’m sorta trying to get into the whole spirit. You know, el espirito!”


Tara’s expression was that of a hopelessly smitten girl, the redhead’s excited, connective talk was the grandest sound she’d ever heard, it has a rhythm of its own. In the giddy aftermath—still feeling the warmth of Willow’s lips marking her cheek—she swayed forward in all her deliberate grace and rubbed noses with Willow.


The diminutive girl could only stand there frozen, Tara’s silly little caress tickling her nose like a warm drizzle.


“That’s how Eskimos s-say hello,” the blonde told her, “We’re learning about them in Human Geography.”


Willow could only nod dumbly at her, her nose tingling, “Yeah, they’re uh, some pretty cool people, those Eskimos…sorta like, cold Hawaiians.”


Tara laughed, her face radiating with her glee, “Oh, Willow, I’ve never met anyone who sees the world like you.”


“I’ve never met anyone with eyes like yours,” Oh great, now I have Honesty Tourrettes.


Before the blonde could even get over her shock to respond the bell had rung, interrupting them rudely or saving her, Tara didn’t quite know.


“I’ll walk you!” Willow offered, a little loudly, “I mean, if you want me to? Walk you to your first period?”


“Sure,” it felt so right to walk side by side with Willow, if only she would take my hand in hers, “M-my first class is in room 109, with Mr. Antolini.”


“Oh, isn’t that AP Human Geography? You’re taking an AP class?” She grabbed Tara’s books from her hand, glancing at their titles, “These are all AP books. That’s so cool! I uh, I take AP too! Nobody else I know does though…the other kids that do never really want to study together, it’s all a competition with these intellectuals today.”


Tara ducked her head, her hair falling like wisps of spun gold to frame her soft face, “You want to study together sometime?”


That’s so hot! “I’d love to study with you.”


Tara couldn’t help but smile around Willow, it seemed. The girl looked so cute walking her to class, Tara’s books in her hands, I wonder if she realizes she’s carrying my books?


She decided to enjoy the scene out of context, Willow might just be some sweet suitor, trying to do small gestures for my affection…like she’d have to if she were. God, I’m a sucker for a girl in red overalls.
Last edited by madwriter on Tue Feb 17, 2009 9:36 pm, edited 3 times in total.
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby lwordemort2 » Tue Feb 10, 2009 5:30 pm

Yay!!

DIBS!!

And well, finally Wil is enjoying the hotness that is one Tara Maclay

*Good images*

Wonderful update!!

PD: Loved the red overalls
Last edited by lwordemort2 on Tue Feb 10, 2009 5:58 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby GrimCityGirl » Tue Feb 10, 2009 5:37 pm

this just gets better and better, you write them both so well. Tara seems slightly more confident in this then the way others write her and frankly I think its bloody marvelous that you've done it like this. it's amazing, continue!
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby tacoda13 » Tue Feb 10, 2009 6:24 pm

More, more, more!!!!!!
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby BentBrokenTheory » Tue Feb 10, 2009 9:57 pm

Wow this Will+Tara interaction is the cutest Ive seen in a long time. I hope everything will work out. I mean does Willow even realize yet?
"For one human being to love another, that is perhaps
the most difficult of all our tasks, one for which all other work is but preparation."

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Courage to change the things I can, And Wisdom to know the difference."


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but rather in finding new eyes."
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby Zampsa1975 » Wed Feb 11, 2009 12:28 am

Yay for good update-y goodness... I hope that there would be some :wtkiss during their study session...
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby SJ » Wed Feb 11, 2009 5:50 am

Great update.
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby Nue » Wed Feb 11, 2009 9:41 am

ha, so cute! and Uncle Leo is such a nice guy ^^
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby love_2003 » Wed Feb 11, 2009 11:47 am

Just started reading this story and am loving it. I like how everybody knows that Willow likes Tara in more than a friend way expect Willow. I like the dream that Willow had also.
Keep the updates coming.
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby madwriter » Fri Feb 13, 2009 5:03 pm

Chapter 5: Dear Diary or How I Learned to Open Doors.



Finally studying together like Tara had so sweetly suggested that day almost a week ago; they lay in Willow’s bedroom floor looking into astronomy books.


“Hey Tara, do you know that the sun is 99% of the mass of the solar system?”


Her studious blue eyes never looked up from her book, “N-no, I didn’t know that.”


“Yeah,” She nodded, her attention on the blonde and not on her book, “It’s crazy to think how important a single thing can be to an entire system, like, how much just one thing could, you know, mean to something else.”


“Yes, it really is,” the words were mumbled from a bit lower lip.


“Yeah…a-and did you know that two objects will always be attracted to each other through gravity?” Emerald eyes were wide as she waited for the response she longed for.


“Oh, I know that.” She spoke, her words soft and strange; Willow could almost taste them and they were like honey.


“Yeah,” Willow felt nervous now, something was hanging thickly in the air between them, “Like even right now, our gravity is pulling us…”


“Willow, would you like a kiss?” For the first time Tara turned the blue hue of her gaze toward her, Willow felt blessed.


“Uh huh,” she gulped.


Tara slinked over to her from across the floor, crawling onto her lap in one fluid motion.


Willow’s senses filled with the other girl’s essence—the warmth of her aura, the scent of her perfume, the feeling of her lips brushing lightly on her own.


Tara’s kisses fluttered across the pink flesh of Willow’s lips; she played with her, slipping away when the redhead, frustrated, tried to deepen their kisses.


“Tara, don’t torture me.”


The blonde’s giggling filled the space that surrounded the two entwined secret lovers. She got up, leaving Willow cold, with no warm Tara-body lying so deliciously on top of her.


“Let’s play a game, okay? Catch me!” Her legs, long and toned, took off, opening doors to other rooms.


And she left Willow there, pouting.


“B-b-but, Tara!” Willow reacted too slowly for the girl to have heard her. She had nothing to do but get up and find her girl; it’s no fair just to give a taste.


She ran through the door she’d just seen Tara exit through, a single thought in her head. She arrived in a desolate hallway that looked just like one of the many in Sunnydale High and looked for another door; Oz and Xander were blocking it.


“Hey Will,” they spoke in unison, smiling.


“Hey…you wouldn’t happen to have seen an incredibly sexy blonde running this way would you?”


Xander’s eyes bulged while Oz just cocked a brow.


At their skeptical looks, she nervously continued talking, “You know…Tara? I’m looking for her. I was studying her, uh, I mean studying with her, and now we’re playing a chasing game that she apparently excels in.”


They continued to stare blankly back at her and she quickly grew impatient, no time, no time, the night goes the quickest. “I’ll uh, just go through here then,” she slipped in between them and through the door they’d been guarding.


She could hear them whisper about her as she left, “Ya hear that? She’s playing a game with Tara. Sometimes I think about two women playing a game…and then I play a game with myself.” “I’m sure that you do.”


And then their voices disappeared as she walked deeper into the unknown, calling Tara’s name. The room she had walked through turned into a woody labyrinth. Strangely she didn’t feel scared for herself at all, she walked bravely and feared only that the blonde might be somewhere lost or hurt.


She didn’t know how long she had been wandering in this vast, dark, wilderness when at last she found the girl. She was strewn like a naked babe underneath a willow tree.


Willow could only stare and gasp in awe at the girl’s naked form. Her body had never felt as alive as it now did; pulsing with some wild passion that she had never guessed could feel so good. Superhuman almost, is how she felt, so high I could probably fly like an airplane, run like a bullet.


She approached like a lioness, “Why do you like making me chase?”


“I don’t,” Tara told her in that soft way, “It’s just, how else am I supposed to know you w-want me?”


Leaning down into the soft, breathing art that is a nude woman, a nude woman whom I love, she told her “Oh, I want.”


Then woke.

~~

Dear Diary,


I keep having strange and actually more than slightly erotic dreams about my new friend Tara—what bothers me most though, is how they all end right before the really good part even starts and wow that makes me a huge creep huh? Am I supposed to be talking to you like a person, Diary? I’m not sure, but on a recent coffee date or uh, “friendly outing” (ha outing) with the aforementioned (and beautiful) Tara, she said someone with as many thoughts as I have flitting around my head at such incalculable speeds should write them down, “cause you might m-miss something important, what with it all whizzing by so quickly.” I suppose she’s right. I mean here I am, with these wild prophetic dreams of Tara nude and kissing me (and then stupidly I wake up—to shame and soiled underpants). And I’m left lost and more than slightly confused. I’ve been nothing but confused for the past week. Confused over Tara, and poor Oz who doesn’t deserve this, and myself for betraying myself and falling for someone so wonderful who most likely sees me as just a friend or worse a sister. I suppose this is all a muddled, woeful entry…but all diaries are despondent reads. I just want a little guidance, oh God (I say this a lot now too).



~~


The first two times she read it over, she was paralyzed in her seat. The third time she needed to get up. In a spell of spontaneous prose she had discovered what her heart had been practically singing, before in a low alto, and now, a baritone chorus—undeniable. She was in love. She was in love with Tara. She was in love with a girl.

Oh what is a little lost red-haired girl to do, walking in the rain at six thirty-five PM; a bout of sudden self-discovery following her like the gray clouds over her head?


Finally she arrived where she meant to be and knocked fiercely.


“Willow?”


~~


Xander had let her in and wrapped her in a towel, but she shook anyway. Like a little leaf in the wind, blown in all directions. “So is this one of the ones where we talk, or don’t talk or--”


“I think I might be kinda gay.” She thought it best to approach the conversation like one would approach the removal of a band-aid.


He just stood there still and nodding, though his eyes shone painfully at the sight of her lost like this. She noticed thankfully, however, that he did not seem bothered by the confession itself. But why?


“You’re not shocked?” She seemed almost disappointed by it.


“Willow, please, I knew before you did.” He smiled like the big brother he was.


Auburn brows furrowed to try and keep the tears at bay, “How could you, when I still don’t even know?”


“Have you seen yourself when you look at Tara? Your eyes pop out like you’re Bugs Bunny during wabbit season.”


She sighed deeply, like someone unloading a giant weight from their chest, “How can I not stare? Have ya seen her? She’s so gorgeous it practically taunts me when she looks at me. She haunts me in my dreams, in my thoughts. Sometimes I think I catch a whiff of her perfume in the hall, and I follow the scent like a dog. Sometimes I think I see a glimpse of her hair walking in the opposite direction and I turn all the way around and follow. I wait for her in her locker every morning, outside her last class every afternoon. And I have to do these things, because if there’s a day when I don’t see her, I feel like this vacuous vacuum, like a black hole walking around, not being able to fill myself up with anything that’s not her. Because I love her, Xander.”


He stood in shock at the outpour of such raw emotion, nothing like Cordy and I, before finally speaking hoarsely, “Then I guess you got your answer.”


Willow sunk into his bed where she sat, not feeling any less lost yet, “And what exactly is it that I’m supposed to do about Oz?”


“He’s going to be hurt, and that can’t be avoided,” since when am I Mr. Advice guy? “The most you can do for him now is the favor of letting him know as quickly and as painlessly as possible. It's not like any of this was in your control, Will.”


“A-and Tara?” she asked, her voice raising an octave in her anxiety, “What am I supposed to say? Hi, you’ve only known me for a week or so, but guess what? I love you.”


“That uh, might fall under the category of coming on too strong,” he smiled halfheartedly at his own joke, “But, I’m pretty sure I’ve seen her eyes light up at the sight of you Will.”


“Her eyes just do that,” she sighed wistfully, “Especially after you make her laugh or smile.”


“Her eyes just do that for you, when you make her laugh or smile.”


She sniffled hopefully, “You really mean that?”


“Heck yeah,” he told her, “When you two finally get together you’ll have a bunch of ravers following you around thinking your lovey-dovey eyes are some trippy light show.”


Finally he got her to laugh and relax, as he always did in desperate times like these, “I dunno Xand…how do I know when I should try to kiss her or—I, I mean, am I supposed to--what?-- pretend to yawn and stretch and suddenly we’ll be necking on her couch?”


“You’ll know when it’s the right time Will…suddenly she’ll be looking at you, and you at her and…then, magic, y’know?”


As if in an epiphany her eyes shone, finally guidance, “Xander…I think you’re God.”


He shrugged, “That’s what the boys at the arcade say too…but then my Pac Man high score speaks for its divine self.”


Hands that were still a little shaky reached up to wipe the dampness on her cheek, “I can’t believe you were actually helpful where it concerns problems of the girly variety. Originally I was going to go to Faith, but I chose empathy over experience.”


Glad that his best friend was getting back to her Willowy self he smiled, “Yeah, yeah…you just start calling me sensei from now on.”
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby Nue » Fri Feb 13, 2009 5:22 pm

madwriter wrote:“I think I might be kinda gay.” She thought it best to approach the conversation like one would approach the removal of a band-aid.

He just stood there still and nodding, though his eyes shone painfully at the sight of her lost like this. She noticed thankfully, however, that he did not seem bothered by the confession itself. But why?

“You’re not shocked?” She seemed almost disappointed by it.

“Willow, please, I knew before you did.” He smiled like the big brother he was.



oh, Will.. since Tara showed up, you got rainbows on your eyes

thanks for the update!
Last edited by Nue on Mon Jul 16, 2012 9:24 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby tacoda13 » Fri Feb 13, 2009 5:41 pm

Yay!! This was a very good update!!!! I like the idea of Xander being Mr. Advice Guy. That was cute!!!!!
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby LittleBit » Fri Feb 13, 2009 7:09 pm

Those last two updates were awesome. I like the whole Restless experience you are writing in connection with the dreams. I really liked that episode. And I love your Xander ... he's goofy but not dumb and a lot of people write him as though he is retarded.

I also loved the interaction between Tara and Faith and then Faith and Willow. I really like Faith as a character and I would love to see her really developed warts and all. She is not always nice but underneath the rough exterior you know she secretly wants to care! :D

Keep up the great work and I look forward to more updates! :D
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby lwordemort2 » Fri Feb 13, 2009 7:57 pm

Yay, new update!!

Well, finally Wil knows. Now just let Tara know! I guarrantee you, she is not going to say no.

Great work!!
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby Zampsa1975 » Sat Feb 14, 2009 5:13 am

Yay for good update-y goodness... I hope Willow very soon tells Oz adios and welcomes Tara to her life...
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby seisatou13 » Sun Feb 15, 2009 7:59 pm

Great update!
More please!!! :peace
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby GrimCityGirl » Sun Feb 15, 2009 8:21 pm

bloody marvelous! amazing! superb! insert complimentary adjective here!
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby DaddyCatALSO » Mon Feb 16, 2009 1:22 pm

Sweet; I like Effective "what would Buffy do - you're extraordianry" Xander.

Nitpick- Tara doesn't seem like the type who'd find a platonically friendly dance with a nice guy "eeewwhhy"

Enjoyed the forest imagery in Willow's dream.
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby willow_tara_always » Mon Feb 16, 2009 3:26 pm

Woaw! Loving it! I really hope Tara tells Willow first that would be the best heart melty-ness-ness! Update soon pweeez! :D
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby madwriter » Tue Feb 17, 2009 9:22 pm

DaddyCatALSO wrote:Sweet; I like Effective "what would Buffy do - you're extraordianry" Xander.

Nitpick- Tara doesn't seem like the type who'd find a platonically friendly dance with a nice guy "eeewwhhy"

Enjoyed the forest imagery in Willow's dream.



Wow, thanks for bringing that up. I actually meant for that to be Willow's thought (as a kind of jealousy thing, the same she felt with Faith, etc).

But reading it again, it does sound like it's written to be one of Tara's thoughts, which is pretty terrible, because I agree it would be completely out of character for Tara to think it. I'm going to change it now, thanks for catching it!

And to everyone, thanks for reviewing my fic. It's really fun actually writing it out and all, but nothing beats reading the reviews and knowing that it's being appreciated. So thank you for taking the time to do that.

I will be updating in a few minutes enjoy it!
Last edited by madwriter on Mon Jul 16, 2012 9:24 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby madwriter » Tue Feb 17, 2009 9:34 pm

Chapter 6: Possessive Demons or Gee, I Wonder What's Going to Happen Next?



Waiting by Tara’s locker had quickly become Willow’s favorite pastime. The girl would approach at a slow and dreamlike gait—her perfect locks bouncing on her shoulder, her skirt flowing around her white thighs; flashes of skin revealed at every step, does she know how hot she is? Willow loved the way the blonde’s face lit up when she saw her. It made Willow feel…wonderful.



“Hey Tara!”



Willow smiled goofily at her, showing off her pretty little white teeth, so cute, “Hi Will. Cool beanie.” She pointed to the girl’s hat; bright orange with a pink flower stitched on its side.



“Oh, ah, that. Yeah, it’s sorta silly huh?” The redhead felt suddenly small and flustered.



“It looks adorable on you. Usually orange on a redhead might be sorta quirky but on you it’s,” she caught herself, “Um, r-really nice.”



The look Tara gave her through her long flirty lashes sent a buzz from Willow’s toes to the top of her skull, good thing I’m wearing this beanie or I bet my head would blow right off. She could only breath out a tiny, “Thanks.”



It was standard between them now to have these little holy pauses where they could only gaze at one another, with a mix of love and wonderment, and fear.



It was shattered by some awkward shadow that had, unbeknownst to them, sidled silently over, “Hey Tara.”



Willow turned to the dark, athletic looking brunette that was now in her and Tara’s space, who’s this unwanted stranger? Her discomfort showed clearly in her countenance.



“Hey Meg,” Tara smiled kindly at the girl, “This is my friend Willow, Will this is Meg.”



Willow could only nod at the stranger’s cool “Hello,” watching the two girls talk about whatever class they shared. She watched their interaction with a feeling of dread building along the plane of her back, no don’t bond with her.



“You know Tare, if you ever need any more help with Calc I can--”



“She won’t,” Willow suddenly found her voice, stepping slightly in front of the blonde, “Guess who the captain of the Mathletes is, two years running, first place winner in regional’s and state? Yeah, me is the answer to that question.”



Meg looked the girl up and down, a brow quirked in amusement, “Quite the achievement, there. I’m sure that doesn’t at all allude to hundreds of nights spent alone.”



“It doesn’t!” The redhead stood defiant though her cheeks flushed in embarrassment.



Meg shrugged noncommittally, her attention already back on Tara, fixing her with an obsequious grin, “So I guess I’ll see you in class then?”



Nodding, Tara mumbled a distracted “Mmn hmm,” why does Willow’s energy seem so agitated?



As Meg left, Willow stared at her brown sneakers, it’s a weird feeling; wanting to know and not at all wanting to know, “So is that girl…special?”



The blonde shrugged, “I’m sure she must be to at least a few people. Why do you ask?”



Willow sighed, deciding that a bold move was the only type that would ever get her anywhere with Tara, and I want to get really far with her, I want to get all the way there (where ever there is, anyway)—



“Willow,” the tone was fond and smitten, “Is that thought ready at all?”



The redhead’s laugh sounded nervous and dorky to her own ears, “Hey Tara…are you good at imagining hypothetical situations?”



“Sure,” Tara told her, nodding, “I’m a right-brain person.”



Willow smiled, “Yeah? I’m left-brained. Anyway uh, well, what would you say…hypothetically, what would you say if I told you I was y’know, jealous of that girl?”



Did she just…say? Once over her openmouthed shock, Tara turned to her smoothly, a lopsided smile on her face, bordering on cheeky, “I’d say you had nothing to worry about.”



As the untimely bell rung Tara bit her lip at Willow, an uncharacteristic surge of self-confidence dancing down her spine, “See you at lunch, Will,” She leaned in to kiss the redhead’s rosy little cheek, “Have mucho um, felicidad in Spanish class.”



“Okay!”



“Okay.”



They were frozen there in the quickly emptying hallway, surrounded by moving bodies that were unaware of the loving, giddy looks between them, the budding of true and real love.



“Bye.”



“B-Bye,” a funny little wave thrown in the redhead’s direction.



“Bye,” and she almost ran into a locker door, slowly walking backwards, still smiling, she’s always driving me to distraction, but I love her at the wheel.



~~



Lunchtime had finally given Willow a respite from all her hard thinking about what she called The Current and Terrible Situation. In love with someone other than her boyfriend, it’s too obvious that there’s something in between us and it couldn’t possibly be just me and not just because others have seen it too, but if I were to be one hundred percent honest with myself there are times when she looks at me as if I’m the only thing in the room or the world that she sees and it makes me—



So on and so on until the bell for lunch had rung and all Willow had to show for her musing were a headache and a warm feeling in her belly (a feeling she had named the Tara-Tingles, which fluttered at strategic points of her body whenever she saw, heard or thought of the blonde).



She walked to the Scoobies’ table (where Buffy, Faith and Xander sat talking animatedly), noticing immediately the queer way they stopped all conversation the very second they saw her approach, “What were you guys talking about?”



Buffy got halfway through squeaking “Nothing!” when Faith interjected her, “We were gossiping about you and the major hard-on you got for T.”



“Not in those exact words,” Buffy defended very quietly.



Willow sighed sardonically and rolled her eyes for good measure, “Thank you for the idyllic imagery Faith. Look, I have to go meet Oz by a tree for a few minutes, text me the minute Tara gets here, okay?” She threw her bag on the tabletop and bounced off, a troubled look on her face.



Xander shook his head, “Diana help guide her to the light.” At Buffy’s questioning look he merely shrugged, “What? I can get all wiccan-y too.”



Faith smiled at him, “I wouldn’t chant too hard there Witchboy; the odds of those two hooking up are as good as my lifestyle one day catching up with me.”



“So sure thing?” Buffy bit her lip.



“Truth ads would lead us to believe that, yes.”



They quieted again once Tara reached their table, exchanging hellos. The girl sat, looking despondently (almost lost) across the table.



“Don’t worry T,” Faith placed a hand on her shoulder, “I’m predicting Red’ll show up a few short minutes after Xander hits the green button on his cell phone.”



And indeed, Tara noticed him doing just that and trying very hard to be sly about it, with his hands turned away from her and him looking away sheepishly.

~~



“How have you been?” He asked her, as understated as always.



“Um, good. I’ve been…good.” What is there to say? Only one thing really, and it shouldn’t be here…in front of all his friends.



“How’s that Tara girl you’re friends with now?”



“She’s fine! Good! Everyone is…fine and…good and, a-and no one ever has secret sexy dreams about anyone else.”



He nodded slowly, “Good, that’s good.”



She started at the sudden vibration in her pants’ pocket, “I have to go, Oz.” Tara’s waiting for me now.



~~



Tara’s brow furrowed, sensing that singular energy reaching her through the air, Willow’s here, just as Faith had predicted. She turned to the dark slayer, “That’s quite a third eye you got there.”



Faith shrugged, “What can I say, T? I’m in touch with the intri-ca-cies of the universe and shit.”



Willow snorted as she reached the table, having overheard the end of the conversation, “I’m surprised you can even pronounce intricacies, what with it having a whopping four syllables and everything.”



Faith shrugged again, (acting) careless as always, “I cave-girl, Red. But at least cave-girl can do this, no problem,” and she kissed Tara’s cheek noisily, with an arm slung around her shoulders, leaving the bright red mark of her lipstick painted on Tara’s pale skin, “So, I guess I got ya there.”



Fuming, Willow could only shrug and sit quietly. Her face darkened and not at all amused, “Guess you do.” I always get like this around her and other people…like I’m possessed by some possessive demon or something. But I can’t help but be mope-y when there’s someone touching all over her like that. I could kill Faith right now.


Dark eyes rolled wearily, “Ah, lighten up for Christ’s sake. Give the girl a hug, T, she’s dying for it.” She bumped shoulders with Tara, shoving her into Willow’s own sad body, “Y’know, T was just saying how she wanted to ask you to come over her place later, but she was too shy to.”



“Really?” The redhead blushed and gaped, I could kiss Faith right now, turning to Tara to ask quieter, “Really? You said that?”



No, “Yes. W-would you l-like to?”



Her whole body seemed to brighten up, “Of course I would.”



“What a surprise, they want to spend time together,” Faith turned to Buffy and Xander, “Gee, I wonder what’s gonna happen next?”
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby Zampsa1975 » Wed Feb 18, 2009 12:11 am

Yay for good update-y goodness... I hope that there would be proper :wtkiss at their date later...
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby LittleBit » Wed Feb 18, 2009 12:55 am

I love your Faith she's awesome!!! :D Keep up the great work.

Oh and I actually thought that comment about Tara dancing with a boy was Willow's thought (only because it made more sense that it was!).
Patience is a virtue I have yet to acquire
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I am my beloved and my beloved is mine
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Only reality can escape the limits of our imagination
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby GrimCityGirl » Wed Feb 18, 2009 3:27 am

Haha! classic. poor Oz though, thats not going to end well. I like how you've written faith, I know writing faith isn't exactly difficult but you do it kind of different without changing her obvious characteristics so, I'm impressed haha.
love it, update soon, this is my fave story at the moment.
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby SJ » Wed Feb 18, 2009 4:42 am

Great writing.
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby willow_tara_always » Thu Feb 19, 2009 11:00 am

Haha,
I love faith always abrupt straight to the point!
its always funny to see how everyone knows whats happening in front of thier eyes apart from the two people who want it the most!
Great update...

x
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby lwordemort2 » Fri Feb 20, 2009 12:28 pm

“Gee, I wonder what’s gonna happen next?”


Well, let's hope some food, kisses and gay love!

Great bit!!
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby madwriter » Sat Feb 21, 2009 10:23 am

Thanks for all the feedback kittens! I'm glad you guys also like Faith as a character. I think there's a depth to her that a lot of people miss, and plus she's hilarious. I'm glad I'm not messing her up character-wise, in you guys' eyes (the same with all the other characters I hope . :sigh )

I'm sorry this isn't an update but good news is you won't be waiting very long--it'll be up a little later today most likely.

A lot of stuff happens in the next update, so I'll be working on it for at least a few hours. Hope you'll like it :kdevil and thanks for still reading.
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby madwriter » Sat Feb 21, 2009 4:58 pm

Chapter 7 Love Will Tear Us Apart



“I can’t believe you did that,” Tara enthused as she looked into her reflection in the bathroom mirror; I hope I look okay for Willow.



The minute school had let out Faith was waiting, leant back on a wall by Tara’s last class. “Will’s gonna take a few minutes going over Percy’s homework. Want to go take a pee with me?”



“I’d be honored.”



And so here she was, smoothing her hair down like the prissy girls she used to wonder at. I guess this is what it feels like. Tara had never been on a date; never taken hours getting ready or had a girl wait for her downstairs under her father’s steely stare. She’d always wondered what it was like… “I just can’t believe you did that,” she spoke almost under her breath.



“Well someone had to,” Faith broke through her reverie, “The world’s ending in 2012 Tare, you two don’t have much time if you’re gonna get to it. And knowing you two…”



“How long are you going to take in there exactly?” Tara’s voice cut through Faith’s comment, blushing at the insinuations but smiling at the thought too, hope is dangerous Tara (the thought sounded like her father’s voice to her and it chilled her slightly).



“About as long as it’s gonna take Red to finally make pale, dorky sex with you.” Faith spoke airily, sauntering out of the stall to wash her hands and catching Tara’s sullen look, “What’s with the frown? Only one girl here has a date with destiny in ten minutes.”



“I was just thinking about my d-dad.”



Something in Faith’s face made Tara think she would almost cry—some twitching, an almost-frown, a fleeting furrow in her brow, and then she cleared her throat and spoke lowly, “You should think about whatever you were thinking about when you stepped outta class just now. You had the biggest smile I’d ever seen in all my life on. Honestly. Never thought Red had it in her, to put a smile like that on a girl’s face…”



“Oh, hush.” Tara smiled again.



~~



Willow put her digital watch to her face for the third time that minute, where are they? Faith said she’d bring her right by my locker to wait. I knew I should’ve never trusted that…that…saint, “Tara! Hey!”



“Yeah I’m not here. I am but a mere hologram of she you call Faith,” the dark slayer folded her arms at her chest with a sardonic grin.



The redhead never turned her eyes away from Tara as she spoke, “Hello, Faith.”



“There you go, say it like ya mean it Red,” Faith smiled at the two almost lovers before shaking her head at them, “Well I gotta go uh, train with B. Catch you girls later,” she winked and strolled out, whistling.



“They um…they train a lot,” Tara noted with a cocked brow.



“Oh! Yeah they’re part of the, y’know…team.” Good one…how could she ever suspect a thing with an explanation like that?



“W-What team?”



Her face looks so cute all befuddled like that, “Oh, you know…the team. Anyway, we should probably head out.” Smooth Willow.



They started walking side by side, occasionally brushing shoulders (not so accidentally). Feeling the heat of each other’s skin, the static of their contact.



Tara gasped imperceptibly as the back of Willow’s freckled hand brushed against the back of hers, God I wish she’d hold my hand, “S-S-So your parents are cool with you coming over?”



Willow scoffed as she opened the school’s door for Tara, “Oh yeah, my parents are cool with everything I do. They practice this parenting technique they invented, it’s called selfish neglect and it’s working out just great for all three of us. Y’know…excluding me, but what does that matter?”



“Oh,” Tara frowned, thinking of Willow being left isolated by her parents. She felt her tummy turn.



“What’s wrong?” Tara’s such an empathetic girl, “You know what that’s like?”



Tara shook her head sadly, “N-no, my problem was that they paid me too much attention. M-my dad and brother…”



The redhead could feel her heart falling fast, through a seemingly endless pit. She felt lightheaded in her despair and sudden terrifying black anger. The girl’s hardly noticeable huddling of herself into herself roused something in Willow and she suddenly took hold of Tara’s hand, squeezing it then drawing it up to her face to kiss the knuckles. As she pulled it away from her lips she kept it in her grip, like a silken prize.



Tara shuddered a little in her place, trying to keep step with Willow through the sudden wave of warmth that had wrapped around her. She didn’t try to contain the sudden smile that overtook her; she knew it would have been a wasted effort. Oh Willow…if I ever leaned in to kiss you, would you pull away? The redhead was the sweetest person Tara had ever known.



Swinging the hand in hers along the way Willow realized that until this moment, ( walking through the sunny street with Tara leaning into her, their fingers tightly laced, their forearms brushing, their shoulders bumping every now and then) until this moment, she had never known what “right” felt like. Every breath she took was giddy now, her atmosphere was lovely now--she noticed things beyond math and science, things had a poetic sort of beauty now, is this love? “Oh Tara look! Look at all the Douglas Irises hanging out of that garden.”



Tara turned to where Willow pointed, with the hand not joined with hers, at the pretty purple flowers peeking through a medium sized house’s white picket fence. “Oh Will, they’re beautiful.”



And even they don’t compare to you, do they? Wow…this girl really does just make me compose the corniest verses I’ve ever heard. But it’s all…true and real and right, Willow led them to the garden, gently removing a flower from the plant and turning with a wry grin to place it in Tara’s ear, “It goes great with the perfect braid in your hair.”



Tara blushed at the simple explanation as they walked, I’ll keep this flower forever. She had never received flowers before from anyone except her mother and uncle. No one had ever, as a romantic gesture, picked a flower and done something as sweet as put it in her hair. She leaned closer to Willow, almost with her head on the girl’s shoulder. “We’re getting close to the apartment.”



Oh no, I want this walk to last at least a little bit longer, with her head on my shoulder, and arm coiled around mine, and dainty thumb drawing secret figures that tingle through body to my soul—like magic—



“We’re here, thoughtful-girl.”



~~



Tara’s apartment was small but Willow had never felt a cozier home. Everything was close; the living room was small and close (the kitchen adjoined to it—small and close), the rooms were small and close, the bathroom small and close, and the warmth was palpable. “I love your place.”



Tara smiled happily, this home was her haven and she was proud of it, “Thanks. Make yourself at h-home okay? You want soda or some food or um, anything at all?” Me maybe? She blushed at the thought, Where does this cheeky energy come from? Damn that Faith Lehane.



“Um, sure I can go for some food. No soda though, I’ve had this terrible toothache for days now,” She rubbed her cheek as she spoke, following Tara the few steps to the kitchen.



The blonde frowned as she began taking out some food to make Willow a sandwich, “Toothache…have you been to the dentist?”



“Heck no! As if I’d willingly go to that administrator of pain and goopy grape-tasting goop that doesn’t at all taste like grape but grape-cadaver, and not in the yummy sun-dried raisin way either but--”



“Willow Danielle Rosenberg! You will go to the dentist. Your mouth is probably full of cavities with all the junk you eat. All you eat is junk; the only greens your mouth ever sees are of the gummy or chewy variety. I’m going to start coming over to cook for you some days, honestly, your diet is terrible.”



The redhead watched the blonde opening cupboards and scolding her with a cute worried little frown on her gorgeous face, she’s worried over me, she cares about me, she really does. Willow smiled until a sudden thought hit her, “Hey who told you my dorky middle name?”



“Xander,” Tara mumbled, busy looking through her spice rack.



“Ah…remind me to kick his ass in Marvel Versus Capcom next time we see him.”



“Sure, whatever that is,” Tara shook her head fondly, washing her hands in the sink before turning to Willow with a small bottle in her hand, “C’mere, open your mouth.”



Willow’s entire form seemed to pause, her mouth hanging open stupidly, her eyes wide and unblinking, oh please say something, “Ah…um…o-okay,” she opened her mouth and closed her eyes, expectant.



“This is ground cloves, I’m going to put it on your tooth and you’re going to chew it slowly, okay? It’s a toothache remedy. Um, i-is that o-okay?”



Willow nodded rapidly, as if I have a problem with your finger in my mouth. “Ooh, cheeky thought.”



“W-what was that?” Tara looked up from where she was sprinkling the ground clove onto the tip of her finger.



“Um! I said, oh cheek is tough, my cheek is tough you know? So uh, don’t worry about hurting it, i-if that was indeed something that you were worried about.”



“Oh,” she bit her bottom lip skeptically as she said this, trying not to smile. She turned to approach Willow, “Okay, open up.”



Willow’s brows rose, her pulse quickened, is that supposed to sound that sexy or am I some sort of…lecher? Tara sidled up close to her, their bellies almost bumping and slid her finger to the molar she’d seen Willow trying to rub better. She stroked her finger gently around it, in a rhythmic soothing motion that was bound to heal her. It was the most nurturing act Willow had ever been part of.



Tara bit her lip when she saw Willow close her eyes, she feels like this because of me. Her own eyes floated down to Willow’s small mouth, wrapped wetly around her digit, she has the most edible little lips. They were thin but lush, her bottom lip jutted out slightly, pouty, almost adorably childlike at times. She cleared her throat, “There you go,” she gasped when she slid away as Willow’s lips pressed lightly to the tip of her finger, almost like a kiss. She turned to wash her hands, regretfully.



Willow chewed slowly, thoughtfully, “Hmm, it really does work fast. Sweet, now I don’t have to go to the dentist.”



Tara glared from the counter, fixing Willow’s sandwich, “You are going to the dentist, missy.”



“Fine,” the redhead sighed leaning back into the counter, her eyes gliding across Tara’s form, obviously appreciating what they saw. The girl was so sweetly making her food, ever thoughtful and careful in the arrangements; again Willow’s heart lurched, she cares about me, she wants it to be good for me…because she cares about me. The thought ran a hot trail from her mind to her spine and chest, legs and low in her belly, wow, even watching her do that simple little thing is somehow remarkable and sexy.



Tara wrapped the sandwich (cut in two halves) in a paper towel and presented it to Willow, “Enjoy,” I really hope that you do.



The redhead smiled as she chewed her first delicious bite, it’s exactly what I wanted…sometime in all the moments we’ve shared thus far, she would’ve had to have paid attention to what I like, remembered it now, tried to replicate it and done such a perfect, wonderful job too. “C’mere,” she grabbed Tara by the waist and pulled her close, kissing her cheek, “Do you know how good this sandwich is?”



She giggled in her arms, heady at their proximity, “I’m glad you like it,” baby, “S-so, want to watch a movie?”



Willow frowned as Tara wriggled her way out of her arms, moving into the living room, I hate it when you leave but I love to watch you go, she couldn’t pull her eyes from the girl’s butt even if she wanted to. Taking another bite she moved to join her. Shrugging, “Sure,” she threw her bag onto the couch where Tara sat, remote control in hand.



A book slipped out of Willow’s woven hippie-bag, practically onto Tara’s lap. The blonde picked it up, inspecting it.



Green eyes shone, protuberant, as she realized precisely what kind of book it was, “Um! Uh!” Uh, oh.



“This is a m-magic book,” Tara turned to her slowly, head tilted curiously to the side, “Do you know that?”



The redhead took a deep breath, she felt doomed almost, she’s going to think I’m crazy, “Tara please don’t think I’m crazy because there are…I have explanations and, and really I’m not weird or, well, maybe a little weird as per mainstream standards but well…I’m sort of a practicing witch.”



“Oh? How long?”



Willow started slightly, of the dozens of responses she had gone through in her head in the second’s pause between her confession and Tara’s question; this was certainly not one of them. “Um, a few months now.”



“And you’re already on May Dostoevsky’s Book of Shadows? Wow,” Tara smiled proudly.



“Tara?” Willow asked, her expression utterly nonplussed, “Not that I don’t completely love the fact that you’re actually impressed with this but, why?”



“Because I’ve been a witch all my life Willow.”



Willow’s eyes bulged comically, Ah yes I understand now, it makes complete sense. The universe thought that she just wasn’t perfect enough for me, so it decided why not add a cherry to all that whip and fudge and sweet cream. Mmn. Touché universe. You win. Yes, she’s perfect isn’t she? It was all clear to Willow now, the almost mystical aura that surrounded the blonde witch, the empathy, the intuition. She moved to sit next to Tara on the couch, “So, you’re like, part of a line and all?”



“Mmn hmm,” she looks so cute when something stimulates her intellect, “Well sort of, m-my m-mother and my grandmother both practiced and they taught me too, from the time I was only five years old…”



And Willow listened so sweetly as Tara told stories of her girlhood, how she had come to study magic, the secrets that had been passed to her from yore.



“Oh so cool!” The redhead enthused. Behind her lively green eyes you could already see daydreams forming of her and Tara, hand to hand, gaze to gaze, making magic together, “Oh Tara we’ll perform the most beautiful spells, I bet, I bet we could be so powerful together. I bet you have so much magic in you, I can see it.”



“M-me too,” Tara told her with an excited sort of smile, “I could s-sense it in you too.”



It was starting to become more and more frequent that Willow would find herself a stranded swimmer in the wide sea of Tara’s eyes. Especially in moments like these, when she looked at her like that.



Tara sighed at the look between them; the heated beam in between their gaze. The way Willow was looking at her, almost like she wants me, made her heart seize.



The phone chose this time to ring, and they both bit their lip not to curse at it.



It rang twice before Tara could finally move to pick it up, “Y-Yes? Mmn hmm, hey Xander. Oh yes, hold on.” She turned to hand the phone to Willow.



“Yeah,” Willow spoke, once it was pressed to her ear, “Hey. Yeah we’re here. No, just talking, why? Well, wait what time is it? Oh really? Oh, well…oh, he said that? Well then I guess…no, no, no it’s fine. I will. I have to, I guess. I know…I need to do it soon, but at the right time and place. Okay. Be there soon. Bye.”



Tara frowned; Willow sounds so sullen, “What did he say?”



“Oz is playing at the Bronze in a little. He uh…wrote a song about me and, well…you know.”



“Oh,” Tara nodded, “S-so you have to go.”



Willow nodded solemnly, “I guess. B-but they’re only playing for an hour! We could go, watch them play and be back here in two hours, or less. I, I mean if you want to…”



“Sure,” Tara nodded. While it hurt to see her with Oz, at least they’re not an affectionate couple, it would hurt more to be alone and without Willow right now.



“Cool,” she smiled, more Tara-time.



~~



As they walked the black night arm in arm, Willow’s other hand clutching the stake in her jacket pocket, they beamed, giddy at the energy bouncing between them; their newfound connection.



They looked at the stars, finding constellations, inventing some. In no hurry to catch the show, they walked like lovers strolling at night.



“You know there are sunspots on the surface of the sun—they look like tiny little specks, freckles on the sun—tiny little things that are bigger than our whole planet,” Willow mused with her head aimed at the sky, clutching Tara closer, “It sorta throws things into perspective huh? Like how we’re just these tiny white specks in the universe, these little balls of energy just bouncing on each other and all? And here we are, hand in hand on this glimmer of a planet, looking up and feeling this…connection. Or at least--”



Tara didn’t attempt to fight the sudden surge of love in her body, she hugged Willow’s abdomen tightly, burying her head in her shoulder, “I feel what you mean.”



When Tara moved to pull away, Willow knew she couldn’t let her. She wrapped her arms tighter around the soft little body, wrapped warm in a sweater, I might die at the final meeting of my lips to hers. And if she had to go—



Suddenly Willow’s hand had found Tara’s cheek, stroked it, then pulled their faces together, softly. The redhead’s cherry lips slid slowly on hers, is this happening?



The texture of Tara’s lips was unlike anything Willow had heretofore felt; a smoothness that could rival the most fragile of flower petals. She licked across them in awe until Tara had so bashfully opened her mouth for her and, oh, she gets softer.



Tara felt Willow graze her tongue on hers, over and over, and then needing to feel Willow more fully, she wrapped her mouth around the wet organ and started to suck. Spurred by the feel of Willow’s small moaning in her own mouth, she pushed her against the Bronze’s redbrick wall, pressing into the slim body.



Willow could only hiss as if burned at the feeling of Tara’s soft body on her. The girl’s mouth released her tongue only to slip her own inside. Tara’s tongue swirled hypnotically in her mouth; Willow felt like she was on some dizzying ride.



“Having fun?”



The broken voice was biting in the chill night air, shattering the spell they’d created. Willow could only whisper under her breath, “Oz…”



“You know I had planned that song as a surprise for you…guess I’m the one who got surprised.”



“Oz…”



Save it.” He left them there, trailing sadly into the night.



Willow turned solemnly to Tara, looking into her eyes, there’s pain for Oz there but no regret, and she was relieved to see this. Kissing her bottom lip lightly she whispered, “I uh…should--”



Tara nodded, “I-I know, I’ll g-go on ahead w-with the others.”



“Okay,” still she held her, hands at her lower back, gripping tightly with her fingertips, grazing her lips on Tara’s over and over, “Hey Tara?”



“Yeah?” the blonde mumbled against her lips, still caught up in Willow’s little lip-brushes.



“Tara,” I love you, “I um, I…it’s going to be you, okay? You’re the one that I…okay?



“O-Okay,” and she tightened her arms around Willow’s neck, kissing her once more before turning to walk the small distance to the Bronze.



As Willow watched her go, she couldn’t help but smile at the sight of the angel walking away under the silvery stars, her hair shining, her face shining, her aura, her soul shining. How I love you. Suddenly it all had a meaning; the studying, the strife, the good times and bad. She would do great things—earn Tara’s respect, awe, and most of all love.



~~



She found him where she knew she would, moping, sat in the back of his van with the doors open on some lonely parking lot. He was blasting Joy Division and playing sad chords on his bass, aimlessly.



“Oz I…I’m sorry,” she approached him slowly, almost cautiously, “I didn’t go looking for this you know?”


[center]When routine bites hard and ambitions are low
And resentment rides high but emotions won’t grow
[/center]


His face was stony as he stared through her; if he let himself look into her teary, now sea-green eyes, he would lose his control and it was all he had left, so he held on.



“I wanted us to last I, really did. But she came to me that day and now I no longer think that it’s by coincidence. I feel like she’s my beautiful reward in this crazy life, so that’s why…” she let out a tiny sob for him and his pain, “And it was never to hurt you, please know that.”

[center]

And we’re changing our ways, taking different roads
Then love, love will tear us apart again
[/center]



Still he said nothing, he looked into nothing and he was so hurt he almost felt nothing.



“Okay…no response is good too,” she nodded, feeling terrible, “I’m sorry, I really am. I just…I care about her so much, Oz, it actually hurts sometimes, and all I know is that if I don’t follow this feeling I’ll regret it forever. And I, I wish there was some way to make you feel less pain about this.”



[center]Why is the bedroom so cold, turned away on your side?
Is my timing that flawed, our respect run so dry?
[/center]



“You could’ve started by not kissing her right in front of me…on the day that I…I wanted to tell you how I…how I loved you.”



“I was supposed to have told you first…I never meant to…”

[center]

Yet there’s still this appeal that we’ve kept through our lives
Love, love will tear us apart again

[/center]

“Oh you’re right, that does make me feel better.”



She hunched her shoulders as if to protect herself from the cutting words, “Isn’t there anything I could do?”



[center]Do you cry out in your sleep, all my failings exposed?
Get a taste in my mouth as desperation takes hold

[/center]


“You can leave me alone.”



And though it hurt to turn and leave him, leave things as broken and bitter as they were between them…she knew there wasn’t any other way for things to be. So she wiped the tears from her face and looked at him one last time, “Goodbye Oz.”



[center]Is it something so good just can’t function no more?
When love, love will tear us apart again
[/center]
Last edited by madwriter on Sat Feb 21, 2009 5:51 pm, edited 1 time in total.
I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by madness, starving hysterical naked,
--Allen Ginsberg
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Re: Is This Love? (This is Love)

Postby Nue » Sat Feb 21, 2009 5:41 pm

When I read this chapter´s title, I put some Joy division music... And I kinda feel bad for Oz... but, I totally get Will.. she can´t do this anymore... When you love somebody else...

kinda emotional now..

thanks for the update!
- Proud Warrant Officer of the Kitten Army - Semper WillTarus!! -

My Heart Draws a Dream
True Colors of Love
A Crazy Little Thing Called Mutation
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