When Love and Hate Collide (NC-17)

[Ice]

Ok, hi! This is the first fic Im posting here and not my best by a long shot! In fact, a lot of people aren't to thrilled with it but they read all the smut, sex filled stuff first, which, to quote a reviewer, I should stick with doing so Im giving you a taste of this before I start posting smut! lol.

Be gentle with me and leave reviews/feedback please....

[hr]

Summary: Set during Seeing Red, Tara goes to the bathroom at that vital time and Willow is on the ouchy end of the bullet. Can love conquer the ultimate barrier!?
Rating: NC-17
Warning: Character death, violence, some language too I believe!
Disclaimer: I own nothing, dont bother suing me coz the only thing I have thats any good is my girlfriend and there is no way in this, or any other dimension that you are getting her!!!! You can however, have my insane cat! lol.



After spending almost two full days celebrating their reunion, Tara and Willow eventually got out of bed, showered and dressed. Things were still a little fraught between Xander and Buffy and who knew what would happen with Anya and Spike after their little impromptu ‘make out’ session on the table of the Magic Box.

Tara had dressed casually, a blue top and jeans while Willow had opted for a white top and jeans.
“Mmmm, clothes.” Willow said with a grin.
“Better not get used to them!” Tara replied suggestively, causing Willow to pull her lover in by her belt loop for a kiss and a hug. Over Willows shoulder, Tara noticed Xander arrive. “Xander!” she said, mild surprise in her voice.

“Ok, not quite the response I was fishing for.” Willow said jokingly. Tara crossed to the window, looking out to see their friend approach Buffy in the yard, “No, he’s here.” Tara told her.

Willow pulled open a drawer in the dresser, turning on hearing the news, “You think they’re making up?” she asked with a smile.

Tara turned, a grin lighting up her face, “I hope so, that’s the best part!” she replied, a small laugh escaping her lips as Willow approached her jubilant lover once again, kissing her fondly but passionately. As she pulled away, Tara headed for the bathroom leaving Willow to steal a look at her friends who had obviously made up and were about to embrace on the bench in the garden. She smiled and turned back to face the room. Listening as Tara sang softly in the bathroom and smiled, she had been so close to losing her forever, but now she was well on the way to a full recovery from her addiction to magic, she was finally happy and Tara was a huge part of that.

The sound of gunshots ripped Tara from the bathroom, she burst into the bedroom just in time to see the crimson flow of life ebbing from a wound in the chest of her lover. “Tara!” Willow said as she fell to the floor. Rushing to her side, Tara felt her own heart slow dramatically and she thought she too could be near death, she wrapped Willow in her arms, her throat constricting as she realised that Willow was barely breathing and bleeding heavily.
“Willow, sweetie stay with me.” She sobbed, her mind rapidly emptying as to any first aid she had once known. From the garden she could hear Xander’s cries of distress and her subconscious noted that Willow wasn’t the only one to have been shot.
Pressing her hand over the bleeding wound, Tara kissed the rapidly cooling forehead of the only woman she had ever slept with and the only person whom she had truly loved. “Willow.” She whispered, her hand now red from the life that was fading from Willow. “I love you so much, please baby.” Tara suddenly understood how it was that Willow had become so addicted to the dark magic, ever fibre of her being was screaming at her to bring Willow back, to call upon whatever forces necessary to resurrect the one wonderful thing in her life.

As she felt the last weak attempt by Willows heart to keep the red head alive, she growled deep and animalistic. Never before had she wanted to kill someone or something, never had she felt such fury and rage. As sirens blared outside, Tara turned her head to the skies and screamed. “NO!”



The paramedics had rushed Buffy to the hospital, calling for another ambulance for Willow, Tara knew that it was pointless. Willow was dead, no amount of medical attention was going to bring her back and everyone knew it. The ride to the hospital was surreal, the paramedics trying their hardest to find some sign of life, when they couldn’t they tried to force one into the eternally sleeping witch. Tara had sat next to Willow holding her hand, she felt as the essence of the woman she loved, left the perfect but now violated body laying before her.
“Goodbye Willow, I will always love you.” She said as she felt Willows hand stroke her cheek for the final time before vanishing into the cosmic ether.

“I’ll never forget you!!” Willows voice was clear yet painfully distant in Tara's head as the ambulance pulled into the hospital.

Tara sat with Xander in the waiting room as both Buffy and Willow were rushed into the ER. Xander kept getting up and pacing the room, demanding to know what was going on and generally venting his frustrations. Tara said nothing, in her chest her heart was breaking slowly, every memory of Willow tried to hold it together but to no avail. The happiness that Willow had brought to her life was now gone, snuffed out like a candle and leaving her in a solitary darkness from which she knew she would never emerge.
Less than 10 minutes later, a young, good looking doctor approached them, his head bowed sorrowfully.

Xander rushed to him, “What? What’s the news, please doctor, tell me they’re ok!!” his voice cracked as his eyes met the young mans and saw more than he wanted to.

The doctor shook his head, “Miss Summers has gone up for surgery, the bullet has done quite a bit of damage but the outlook is good, providing she makes it through the surgery.” Xander nodded, sighing deeply as he absorbed the reasonably good news.

“And Willow?” he asked, praying that she would be just as lucky.

Before the doctor could reply, Tara turned her head towards the two men. It was the most movement she had made since arriving at Sunnydale Memorial Hospital.
“She’s dead.” Tara said plainly, her voice seemed hard and cold like it was coming from someone else.

Xander spun around and ran to the blonde witch, coming to a skidding halt at her feet, “No, Tara. Don’t say that, she’s strong, she’ll come through, she has to!” Xander begged, he wasn’t sure who he was trying to convince but if it wasn’t himself, he wasn’t succeeding. He turned back to the doctor, the solitary tear that was trickling down Tara’s cheek choked Xander and he couldn’t bear to look.

The doctor came over to the pair and sat down next to Tara. “I’m terribly sorry…” he began. Xander shook his head in disbelief.

“No!” he said, “You’re wrong!” The tears flowing unashamedly down his face.

The doctor swallowed noisily, “I’m so sorry but there was nothing we could do, Miss Rosenberg had lost too much blood. She died a few minutes ago.” He said, his voice small and full of genuine sadness.

Tara looked up at him, her eyes being the only sign of her true grief and heartbreak. “You liar!! She was dead before she got here!” she said menacingly, pushing past the doctor and heading out towards the morgue, leaving Xander sobbing openly on the floor.
[hr]

[Ice]

Tara walked towards the morgue, passing various medical personnel on her way but seeing no one. The tears crept one by one down her cheeks but she made no sound, her shoulders remained static. Inside, she could feel the hollow in her chest where her heart once was, her stomach somersaulted violently as she approached the clinical white double doors and she froze, causing a young doctor who was walking behind her to crash into her back.

“Oh, I’m so sorry.” He said, as she turned glaring. “Are you ok?” Tara looked at him incredulously; she was in a hospital, outside the morgue and obviously upset.

“What do you think?” she asked him, her tone relaying the obvious stupidity of his question. He mumbled another apology and pushed open a door to his left and disappeared into the room beyond.

Tara stared at the double doors in front of her once again, beyond them she knew was the empty shell of the woman who was once her world and even though she knew Willows spirit had already left, she still wanted to say goodbye properly.
She stole herself against the images she was about to face and reached out for the cold metal handle. As she pushed one of the doors, a large security man grabbed her shoulder. “You can’t go in there, miss!” he bellowed.


Xander was sat in the waiting area, he had finally stopped crying and his head hung in utter disbelief. ‘She can’t be dead’ he thought. Memories of all the good times they had had flooded his mind, birthday parties, days out to the beach, video nights with Buffy, every sweet word she had spoken, every comforting sentence and hug overcame him and the tears fell once again.
He slumped back in the chair and looked around the room, the sudden realisation that he had been here before, exactly here when Joyce had died. “You have no idea how much I hate this place!” he told the large space.

Yelling and screaming broke into his thoughts and he leapt to his feet, rushing towards the corridor as he recognised Tara’s voice.

“Get your fucking hands off of me!!” she was screaming at someone, Xander had never heard her so distressed in his life and the sound chilled him further.

As he burst into the corridor, he saw a very large security man trying to guide Tara away from the doors of the morgue, after she had taken offence and tried to push him away he had lifted her clear off of her feet and was carrying her towards the exit. He ran towards his friend and stopped the security guard who was struggling to keep a hold on Tara who was struggling fiercely.

“Hey, hey. HEY!!!” he yelled as Tara accidently kicked him in the stomach.

As he held his stomach and coughed slightly, the security guard eyed him with suspicion.

“You know her?” he asked, returning Tara to the floor where she turned and glared at him, fresh tears streaking her cheeks.

“Yeah.” Xander managed, “What’s going on?” He directed this question more at Tara, the heartbreak evident in her face made him fight to suppress his own sobs.

“I want to say goodbye to Willow and this jerk grabbed me and tried dragging me away. I just want to say goodbye!” Tara said, the last line breaking her voice and her ability to stand. She slipped quietly to the floor, her entire body convulsing with the sobs of the broken.


“She can’t go in the morgue, not yet, someone will get her when the body is ready to be viewed.” The security guard told Xander in a whisper, “But until then she has to try and remain calm or I will have to remove her from the hospital.”

Xander nodded, his external composure surprising him. “I’m sorry, I’ll take care of her.” He told the security guard apologetically. The large man nodded and turned away striding down the corridor and back towards the morgue. He had a feeling this wasn’t going to be the last encounter with this distraught blonde.

Xander knelt beside Tara, wrapping her in a huge hug and just holding her. He knew there was nothing her could say to make her feel better, nothing that could be done to ease the hole Willows death had dug out into her chest. “C’mon.” he said, helping her to her feet, “Lets go and sit on something less icky.”

As Tara rose to her feet, his own grief joined hers and together they headed back to the waiting room to await the doctor and their last visit with Willow.

Xander had decided that coffee was the answer and after making Tara promise to wait for him, he wandered to the vending machine in the corridor.
Tara stared at the chair in front of her, her mind chastising her for her appalling behaviour.

“What were you think you stupid idiot!” her mind yelled at her. “I just want to say goodbye.” She repeated, causing an elderly couple to look up at her and offer a sympathetic smile. The same doctor returned to the room, looking around nervously he saw Tara and inhaled deeply.



This was his first job since graduating medical school and the first death he had to deal with, he was finding it harder than he could possibly imagine. As he crossed the vast expanse between them, Xander returned with two cups of steaming coffee. The doctor nodded at Xander who smiled weakly.

“You may see her now if you wish.” He told Tara, resting his hand gently on her shoulder.

The blonde witch stood slowly looking at Xander whose eyes were already filling with tears once again. He handed the coffee to the elderly couple who sat across from Tara and as he did so, Tara's hand slipped into his own. They followed the doctor down the corridor to the morgue and paused outside the door.

“You don’t have to do this now.” He whispered to Tara, the concern for her plain in his voice.

“I have to.” Tara replied as she took a deep breath and pushed the door open.


The room before them was cold, sterile and uninviting. A small office filled the corner to her left and empty tables sat to her right in front of a wall of storage fridges. At the far end of the room, one solitary table held a form, the bright red of her lovers hair clearly visible. As they crossed the room, Xanders grip tighten on her hand and she smiled weakly at him.

Xander was the first to speak. His fingers traced Willows face, her eyes closed as if she were sleeping. “Hey Will.” He said, the wobble of tears unhidden in his tone, “I….” all words were lost to the young man and he broke down sobbing freely for the loss of an amazing woman and his oldest and very best friend. He kissed the cool forehead of the young woman whose life had been so cruelly extinguished so early.

“I don’t know how to say it.” He said, looking up at Tara who was staring at the empty body before her. “She was my best friend my whole life and now….”

Tara placed her hand on his shoulder, in the selfishness of her own grief, she had forgotten that Xander had grown up with Willow, had enjoyed the moments even she couldn’t imagine. Leaning in to kiss Willows forehead he tried unsuccessfully to compose himself. “I love you Willow!” he told her, never again would he be able to speak those words with the absolute truth he had just displayed. Taking a step away, he silently moved to the door, allowing Tara time with the woman she loved.

“I know you’re not there anymore.” She began, her tone flat and level. “But I have to say goodbye, oh Willow, I wish I had told you how much I love you.” The tears in her throat constricted her airway and made everything so much harder. “I can’t go on without you, I need you to be here. We all need you.”
A single tear slipped from her flooded eyes as her voice cracked slightly. “I love you Willow, I always have, always will and I promise you we will find out who did this to you and they will pay!!”

Xander hung his head, the hatred, even though deserved, sounded so wrong coming from the passive woman.

“Sweet dreams my beautiful angel.” Tara finished, kissing Willows forehead then lips before turning and walking from the cold room.


As the door slammed behind them, a tall figure emerged from the shadows and placed a gnarled hand on Willows forehead. "She can get you back!" the figure said in a low, menacing voice. "But only if she really wants you!" Stepping back into the shadows, it uttered a sinister laugh before vanishing completely.

[lottagay]

Wow keep going, this is wonderfully heart wrenching rarely does a fanfic make me cry this one did. Please continue with this one.

[river]

wow that sounds good! please go on with it!

[Ice]

Despite Xander’s best efforts to get Tara to return to his apartment, she arrived back at the Summers’ house alone. Xander had gone down to the school to tell Dawn what had happened and he had told her that he would take her back to his apartment and take care of her for the evening.
Tara stepped into the bedroom that she shared with Willow, the broken glass from the window scattered across the carpet and the last physical remnants of Willow pooled in a deep dark stain. She calmly looked around the room, studying the pool of blood and the broken glass she told the empty room; “Dawnie cannot see this.” With that she turned and headed down to the basement, fetching a hammer, dustpan and brush and a Stanley knife she returned to the bedroom.

Tara's body acted on its own, her internal torment telling her to just sit and grieve, her body telling her to do something, anything so that Dawn could be spared the brutality of Willows death. Slowly, and with a strength she didn’t know she possessed she dragged the furniture from the room. The rage and pure blinding hatred for Willows murderer pulsed through her veins, she pushed the bed to block the doorway and fell to her knees. Wielding the sharp blade she sliced through the tough carpet and ripped at it with her hands, screaming at the injustice of a life that had been so unfairly stolen. “We should have been forever!” she yelled into the cheerful Californian sunshine.

[hr]

Every decision creates a new thread, a new reality.
In this reality, Tara never went to the bathroom and she was the one who was killed sending Willow into the darkest place known to the universe. Here, Dark Willow was finding herself, absorbing the power from every book in the Magic Box!

As the vivacious red head became a deadly black haired, black eyed creature, hell bent on revenge, a sinister figure emerged from the training room. With one wave of its gnarled hand, Anya collapsed behind the counter and Dark Willow turned to face this new and powerful figure.

“You know that she is still alive.” It told the dangerous witch in front of it. “Not in this reality, but in another.”

Dark Willow regarded the figure silently, raising one perfectly sculpted jet black eyebrow slowly. “Really?” she said as the figure glided into the room. It nodded, its cracked skin oozing something unmentionable and blue, the yellow teeth glistening in the soft light.

“In her reality, it is you who died.” The figure told her.

Dark Willows head tilted, on anyone else it would have been the perfect imitation of a curious cocker spaniel, on Dark Willow it would have sent a shiver through the body of any mortal who had seen.

Dark Willow raised a hand, her mouth opened to cast a spell to remove this irritating distraction. “If you kill me, you can’t get her back!” it told her plainly.
Staring pain and death in the face hadn’t shaken this figure at all and its words froze Dark Willow in her tracks. “She wants you back, she’s building herself up enough as we speak. Soon she will be able to see me and I can help you be together.”

Dark Willow glared at the figure, she had already been told that she couldn’t have Tara back, that there was no way she could raise one killed by human means. Why this demon was trying to increase her suffering she had no idea, but it would stop now.

“Bored now!” she said, shooting her hands out in front of her, black/purple magicks bursting from the tips of her fingers directly at the sinister being before her.

[hr]

Tara had ripped the carpet up and was sat in the middle of the room surrounded by the destruction of her actions. “Feel better baby?” she heard Willow ask. Tara shook her head, “You’re just my imagination.” And with that she stood once again and punched out the remaining glass in the window.

Staring at her now bloodied fist, she became aware of another presence in the room. She spun and saw a tall figure, its dark, cracked skin oozing some blue fluid, its gnarled hands stroking the skin of its cheek thoughtfully. Tara instantly recognised it as a Spagnot demon, she had seen pictures in books but they were thought to have been eliminated by Osiris. The Spagnot had the ability to move people from one dimension to another. Osiris had taken offence when the Spagnots had moved the alternate dimensional lover of a powerful king back to his realm after her death. Suddenly Tara felt some sort of hope, the Spagnot demon wasn’t able to be called, it only showed itself to the worthy.

“Been to see Willow.” It told her as she felt her legs buckle and she slid down the wall, ripping her shirt on a shard of glass and cutting her back. “Gotta say, she’s not so nice where she is!” The demon sat heavily on the bed.

‘This isn’t real, I’m having a reasonable conversation with a demon.’ Tara thought. “W-where is she?” Tara asked. The Spagnot contemplated the question for a second. “In her reality, you are dead. She’s back on the darkest magicks and has an interestingly dark make over.”

Tara felt tears stinging her eyes, she had been so proud of Willows recovery and knowing that her death had pushed her back onto dark magic made her feel physically ill. Before she could speak the Spagnot continued, “You can save her.” It told her simply. “You have a pure light that saved her once before, she can be returned to you, the Willow you know can be here and all this can be a horrible dream.”

Tara shook her head, she knew that raising people from the dead was nearly impossible at the best of times, and a human death by human means was the finality of life. There was no way she could have her Willow back and she knew it…. But she didn’t believe it, any chance of having Willow returned to her looked extremely good.

“It’s not possible.” She said, “It’s done, my Willow is dead.” On uttering the words, Tara dug the last painful hole in her chest, the emptiness filling her and choking her throat with sobs once again.

“She doesn’t have to be! Lets talk.”

[hr]

In another dimension………

Dark Willow unleashed her first bolt of power which contacted with the wall and crumbled the pillar. The figure who had lied to her was gone. She snarled at the space it had once occupied before her attention returned to the task in hand. “Warren!” she growled as she headed for the door.

[hr]

“It’s really that easy?” Tara asked incredulously. The Spagnot nodded, a grotesque smile exposing yellow teeth. “You can alter the dimension and have her back 5 hours ago.” It told her. “You have been deserving and are a worthy candidate.” It finished.
Despite knowing that she really shouldn’t fool with the natural order of things, the Spagnots words were too tempting. “Five hours ago?” she asked.
“You can save them all. You have the power to change the future.”

Tara nodded, “I understand.” She said, as she contemplated the offer.

Looking into the twisted red eyes of the demon she nodded. “You
understand the cost to you?” it asked her, rising from the bed and gliding to the window where she still sat.

“I understand the cost. The price is worth it to save them.” She said, a single tear trickling down her cheek.

“Very well. I will grant her return.”
[hr]

[Ice]

As the magic was torn from Tara, a wind erupted around the room, screaming like a banshee and burning her ears. Outside, a dark cloud engulfed the bright day and turned it as black as night. The Spagnot demon glowed with the purity of Tara's magic, absorbing the magical energy and increasing its own power.
A booming voice filled the room suddenly, “YOU WILL NOT CHANGE THE NATURAL ORDER OF THINGS!!” It boomed, shattering the remaining glass in the windows and temporarily deafening both Tara and the Spagnot.

[hr]

Dark Willow had hunted Warren down to the forest, his pitiful spells had done nothing but increase her anger towards him.
Using her power, she had him trapped between two trees where he was screaming for help. It was pitiful. He had finally decided that after wanting to talk, that maybe he should do the smart thing and shut up.
“What’s the matter, I thought you wanted to talk?” Dark Willow said her tone flat and cold. Warren looked away,

“No.” he said.

“Okay. I’ll talk!” Dark Willow told him, producing the bullet with which he had shot Buffy earlier.
With one simple gesture, Warren’s shirt tore open and he realised that he was in deep trouble, “What are you doing?” he asked, his voice showing the first signs of nervousness.

“Shh!” Dark Willow told him.

“Hey, I’m sorry okay? I’m sorry!” Warren couldn’t hide the pleading from his voice as Dark Willows eyes fell to his chest.

“Wanna know what a bullet feels like, Warren? A real one?” Fear crept into Warren’s eyes as he realised the woman in front of him was more than likely going to kill him. “It’s not like in the comics.” She continued, her tone was so cold, uncaring.

“No. No!” he said, the fear showing in his voice.

Despite the pleading in the voice of her captive, Dark Willow continued. “I think you need to….. feel it.” The last two words sent the bullet slowly into the soft flesh of the man who had murdered Tara. The pain instantly burned through Warren and he unashamedly begged; “Oh god, stop it!”

Dark Willow, intent on increasing his pain just that little bit more, proceeded to inform him of what would happen to him, what he had done to Tara.
“It’s not gonna make a neat little hole. First, it’ll obliterate your internal organs.” She told him in a very matter of fact tone. “Your lung will collapse. It’s like drowning.” Warren resumed his begging but Dark Willow ignored him, “When it finally hits your spine, it’ll blow your central nervous system.” Warrens begging infuriated the dark witch and she magically sewed his mouth closed, not only to stop the incessant drivel but to make it harder for the murderer to breathe, thus increasing his agony.

“The pain’ll be unbearable, but you won’t be able to move.” She told the newly hushed man, “A bullet usually travels faster than this, of course.” Warren struggled to breathe against the confines of the stitches in his mouth, the fear of the woman in front of him clearly written across his face as she continued; “But the dying? It’ll seem like it takes forever. Something isn’t it?” Something in Dark Willow changed, the agony on the face of the man in front of her was unseen, the only image she now carried was that of Tara, how the most beautiful woman in the world who had been so cruelly ripped from her life.

“One tiny piece of metal.” Dark Willow said, a vaguely philosophical note tingeing her voice. “Destroys everything.” A look of sadness tinted her eyes before she continued. “It ripped her insides out. Took her light away. From me. From the world. Now the one person who should be here is gone, and a waste like you gets to live. One tiny piece of metal.”
Warren struggled to breathe, to fight the pain burning through him as the bullet ripped a hole in his lung.

“Can you feel it now?” Dark Willow asked him releasing the stitches from his lips to allow him to answer. Warrens selfish sense of survival begged with Dark Willow to spare him, his claims of regret and understanding sounding almost sincere.
On hearing Buffy calling Willows name, Warren new the game was up, he tried one last time to appeal to her better nature, “I know you’re in pain, but…”
Dark Willow regarded him with disinterest. “Bored now!” she stated. Just as she began raising her hands to inflict the final revenge, a dark shadow engulfed her spinning her wildly. As Buffy, Xander and Anya arrived in the clearing, Dark Willow disappeared from their realm altogether, leaving Warren dying in his natural restraints and the Scoobies in total shock.

[hr]

Osiris ripped Dark Willow from her dimension, pushing her into the spell that that interfering Spagnot demon was casting. ‘They want Willow back. They can have this one!’ he thought.
As the wind and screaming died down in Tara's bedroom, she rubbed her face, brushing the hair from her eyes she looked around. She was alone. The one tiny piece of hope left in her heart burst and Tara realised that she had to face the rest of her life without Willow.

In the furthest corner of the room, Dark Willow had been dumped unceremoniously between the bed and the adjoining door to Dawns bedroom. She shook her head and sat up when she heard the familiar sound of Tara. Standing up, she immediately recognised where she was and her eyes were instantly drawn to the window. All of the glass had been smashed and was thrown around the room, a room that no longer had a laid carpet. Beneath the glass, Dark Willow saw the familiar shape of her girlfriend, although rather than lying dead as she was when Willow had last seen her, she was hugging her knees and crying softly.
“No! It’s not you, you’re dead!” Dark Willow growled at the blonde, who was clearly very much alive.

Tara looked up, the voice was Willows but the venom with which she spat out the words was definitely not that of her lover. She studied the woman in front of her. Snug black trousers, a black shirt that Tara couldn’t recall having seen before and the midnight blue jacket that they had found in some store in the mall. The most disturbing change in her girlfriend was the rage and hatred etched across her face, her eyes deadly pools of black as was her hair.
Tara suddenly felt scared, never before had she feared Willow, but whoever this was in front of her, it wasn’t the woman she loved. This was a deadly, unpredictable and powerful black witch but somewhere inside this Willow form, she could see the passion that had first drawn her to Willow in the first place.

“Willow?” Tara asked softly, receiving a cold glare from the Dark version of her soul mate. “Is that really you?”
Dark Willow stared at Tara. She had witnessed the death of this woman herself, had seen the life blood draining from her body, had ordered her return and on denial, had set about avenging her death. Whoever or whatever this woman was, Dark Willow was certain she wasn’t the Tara she knew, loved and had lost.

“Willow doesn’t live here anymore!” she told Tara before disappearing in a cyclone and leaving Tara truly alone.

[Ice]

Dark Willow had teleported back to the exact same spot in the forest from which she had been so rudely ripped. “Warren” she called softly, almost childlike. As she turned and started down the small incline she stopped. He wasn’t there. There was no blood, the earth where he should have been standing hadn’t been disturbed and the Scoobies were nowhere in sight. “Well, saves them getting in my way.” Dark Willow muttered. “Now, I find Warren.”

A small wind disturbed the leaves between the two trees causing Dark Willow to pause, there was no breeze to be felt yet the leaves and other loose debris was spinning wildly.

“Nice trick!” she said out loud, sure that Warren had somehow managed to escape and was hiding in the nearby undergrowth. She took a few steps towards the growing tornado and was thrown violently backwards, landing painfully on her rear. The formidable face of Osiris filled the clearing, his voice booming around the silent woodland; “You wanted her back!” he bellowed, “She wanted the same thing.”

Dark Willow glared at the gate keeper and got to her feet, brushing the leaves and dirt from her ass. “She has the you that she will despise!!” he said, laughing hideously into the night. Dark Willow said nothing, she raised one eyebrow and looked as bored as she felt.

“Fuck you Osiris!” she said simply, “You wouldn’t have given her back to me and then told me about it.” With that she extended one hand gracefully and the gate keeper howled in pain as a bolt of magic hit him squarely in the jaw.


Tara sat shaking in the corner of the room. “What the hell was that all about?” she asked herself quietly. The chill of the darker Willows words still ran the length of her spine and she shivered against the warm sunshine. “The spell simply didn’t work!” she told herself, as soon as the words had left her mouth she knew that she was wrong. “Hey, Spagnot!!” she yelled into the room, “Get your ass back here and explain.”
Nothing.
“Fine, I’ll work it out for myself.” She crossed the room, climbing over piles of carpet that had been blown around the room during the mini cyclone and reached the large chest that contained many magical paraphernalia. The lid creaked in complaint as she raised it. “Hmm, sage, golbus dust, white candles, a phoenix feather and the blessed sand.” She said as she lifted each ingredient out of the chest and laid it on the bed, she disappeared momentarily and returned with a map of Sunnydale. Clearing a space in the middle of the room, she laid the map out and lit a candle at each of its corners. With the sage and phoenix feathers at opposing corners she scattered the golbus dust over the entire map. Taking a deep breath, Tara cleared her mind.

“For the spirits of the lost, from the heart of the pure,
I call upon you, Hecate, goddess of change,
Guide me to the woman I love.”

Tara sprinkled the sand over the map as she recited the spell. Opening her eyes and looking down, she expected to see a small light indicating Willows position, either at the hospital or wherever the dark imitation was. Instead of a small light, there was nothing. Tara frowned, ‘there should be something’ she thought, ‘the spell couldn’t have worked, that wasn’t Willow’. “Oh goddess.” Tara exclaimed as she realised what she had done. The telephone cut into the silence and made her jump. She fought her way into the hall and found the phone on top of the dresser. “Hello?” she asked, her voice shaking slightly. On the other end she could hear Anya in the background, she was crying and Tara hoped that it wasn’t about Buffy.

“Tara?” Xander asked, although who she thought he was expecting she didn’t know. “It’s Buffy.” He said, his voice lifting slightly. “She’s out of surgery. She should be fine.” He said. Tara could just picture him in his apartment, a huge goofy grin brightening his features despite the death of his friend. “That’s great Xand.” She said, a smile creeping across her own face. “I-I have to go, I’ll meet you at the hospital a little later.” She said before hanging up the phone without giving him a chance to reply.


Dark Willow was striding purposefully through the dreary back streets of Sunnydale, she needed power and she needed it now. She had no clue where Warren had gone or how he had managed to get so far away with a bullet slowly burning through his body. She had guessed that those meddling Scoobies had cut him down when she had been so rudely teleported back to the Summers house to be confronted with that fake image of Tara, but he wasn’t at the hospital and she was feeling strangely drained. She had tried a locator spell but something had gone very wrong, Warren hadn’t shown up but there was one incredibly bright light, a light that was Tara.

She burst through the concealment spell around Racks and found a waiting area full of grimy and overdosed idiots. “Hey sexy.” A younger man stood and approached Dark Willow, his hand groping for her ass. “Drop dead!” she growled at him and the man collapsed to the floor, holding his chest and screaming in agony.
The door to Racks inner sanctum opened slowly and Dark Willow walked in, raising complaints and mumbled insults from the other, barely conscious addicts slumped around the room.

Rack was sprawled out on the couch, above him a young woman floating inches from the ceiling, the twisted delight of her screams written clearly over his face. He looked up when he noticed his visitor. Before him Dark Willow stood in macabre silence, the door closing behind her. “Guess the rehab didn’t take huh? That’s the way it goes sometimes.” He said almost casually as he drank in the dark vision before him. He dropped the young girl from the ceiling, her screams dying as she hit the ground, and laid there gasping for air. Rack lifted himself from the grubby sofa and crossed the room, admiring the power and danger radiating from the woman before him. “When you first came to me, you were just a little slip of a girl.” He told her, crossing the last few feet to stand closer than was truly comfortable. Massaging the dark aura, he continued; “Look at you now. So… growed up!” his voice bore the evidence of pride and a hint of arousal as he walked slowly around her. “Just full of dark juice.” His breath was coming to him in short, ragged gasps and Dark Willow felt physically sick, Rack had previously made her nervous but now he just inspired repulsion and hatred in her and she had to fight not to punch the lecherous dealer squarely in the jaw.

As his hands ran across her neck, Dark Willow looked down to the ground, she hoped in an attempt to look coy. “And you still taste like strawberries.” He purred into her ear.
The arrogance and certainty oozing from this man enraged Dark Willow but his next comment forced her to lock eyes with him. “You came because you want something, don’t you?” he said, his mouth only a couple of inches from her own, his stale, foul breath filling her mouth and increasing the nausea she already felt. She knew if she spoke, she was going to screw it all up, so she nodded slowly.

“So tell me, Strawberry. What on this earth do you want?” his lips edged closer to her own and something inside her snapped. Her hand went up to his face, squeezing his cheeks painfully as the other locked onto his chest. “Just to take a little tour!” she said simply as she drained every last drop of magic from the hideous man before her before dropping him heavily to the ground. “That’s better.” She said finally before delivering a swift kick to the groin of the body before her and leaving the building forever.

Xander had arrived at Buffy's house to collect Tara. “Tara, you ok?” he asked as she emerged from upstairs, she looked absolutely awful and he realised how stupid the question was. “I mean, are you getting sick?” She smiled weakly and shook her head. “How’s Dawnie?” she asked, eager to avoid any talk of what had happened since she’d last seen him. Xander shrugged, “She’s devastated.” He said sadly as Tara put on her coat, “But looking forward to seeing Buffy.” He added hopefully as Tara headed out of the front door, leaving him to close it solidly behind him and join her in the waiting car.

[DaddyCatALSO]

Ouch, painful. For soem reason, the last paragraph was the worst part....
I'm honestly surprised Tara only struggled physically with the security guy.Lucky for him that's all she did but still...
This is very different from soem other specualtions on this ALternate Version I've seen (well, okay, from my own, I haven't seen any others ) and I'm defintiely intrigued.

ETA: Okay apparently the update wa sposting while I did this...by "l;ast paragraph" I eman the one where the Spagnot appears in the morgue.

[Ice]

Xander, Anya, Dawn and Tara arrived at the hospital for the second time that day. As soon as she got out of the car and walked towards the automatic doors, Tara felt physically sick. She hated hospitals at the best of times, but now she truly despised them and knew that doctors would tell you whatever they thought you wanted to hear, whether or not it was the truth.

They rode the elevator up to the ward in silence, Dawns face wore the worry of everyone around her despite their best efforts to keep her spirits lifted. As the doors slid open, the Scoobies, or most of the Scoobies stepped out into the corridor.

Smiling politely at a nurse who was sat behind an impossibly large desk, Tara asked “Buffy Summers?”

The nurse eyed each one of them slowly in turn. “Are you family?” she asked, her bedside manner leaving a lot to be desired. They all nodded in unison and the nurse sighed deeply. Lifted her substantial bulk from the chair she lead the gang to Buffy’s bedside.

“Thank you.” Tara said politely as the nurse turned to leave, she turned back,

“She needs rest, you have 30 minutes.” She told them briskly before waddling back to her chair. Dawn stuck her tongue out behind her back drawing a giggle from Xander.

“That’s not polite Dawn!” Buffy said weakly as her eyes opened heavily.

In turn, each Scooby hugged the debilitated Slayer gently. They hadn’t spoken about how to tell her of Willows fate, so as not to upset Dawn further.
With their initial hugs and kisses out of the way, Buffy looked around the room with surprise. “Where’s Willow?” she asked. Dawn burst into tears, each one ripping at Tara and forcing her own to begin flowing.


Dark Willow, now full with more dark power than she had ever thought possible, was marching around the nastiest neighbourhoods Sunnydale had.
“Warren?” she called, her voice as soft as any she had ever used in the most intimate moments with Tara. Tara. Just the memory of her lover sent a bolt of fury through her veins, veins that were now clearly etched across her china white face. She approached Willy’s Bar and heard a man laughing, a victorious and jubilant laugh. “Warren!” she growled, ripping the door from its hinges and causing many of the patrons to run in fear… including Warren. “Hold it!” she ordered, although it wasn’t a spell, the dark figure standing in the doorway was enough to freeze many of them to the spot.

Gesturing towards the demons and vampires scattered around the dank room, she continued, “I have no issue with you.” She told them simply, “I want him!!” her voice deepened into a growl as her eyes became deep pools of obsidian hell. Warren turned, seeing that his only escape route was blocked. “W-what’d I do?” he asked, his voice childlike and instantly obnoxious. Dark Willow looked at him incredulously.

“What did you do?” she bellowed at the weasely man before her.

His eyes widened to almost saucer sized, “She’s fine, it was on….” He continued as Dark Willow drew back one delicate hand and punched him firmly in the face sending him flying across the bar.

“You killed her you murderous bastard!” she roared, “Did you forget our little meeting in the woods?”

Warren sat up slightly, wiping at the blood that poured from his nose and looking confused, “Woods? Meeting? I don’t get it.” He told her. His words fell on deaf ears, the blind fury controlling Dark Willow was not allowing her to see exactly what was going on.
As she reached him, she stood over the small man, arms hanging by her sides and her midnight eyes burning.
“Willow, I….” Warren began, he had caught the end of the news as he’d entered the bar and the report had said that the girl who had been shot had survived surgery and was now on the road to recovery. “No one died.” He said defensively.

Dark Willows eyes burned red before returning their natural and hypnotic green. She smiled maliciously, “No one but you!” she stated and with one fluid arm movement, skinned the murderer and left his body slumped against the wall.

She turned to regard the demons and vampires who were eying the body hungrily, “Destroy it!” she spat, many of the demons leaping from their seats and picking out the best bits from Warrens remains.



Back at the hospital, Anya had taken Dawn to fetch a drink, she had experienced enough life to understand death and even though they hadn’t always seen eye to eye, Anya was just as upset over Willow’s death as the others.
“N-n-no!” Buffy whispered in a tear choked voice. “She can’t be….” Her voice trailed off as she found herself unable to say the word. Tears seemed to fill her body but the shock stopped them from flowing. She sat up suddenly and winced at the pain in her chest, “We have to find Warren, he has to pay for what he’s done.” She snarled, partly from the pain in her body.

Both Tara and Xander extended a hand and gently guided the Slayer back to bed, Tara refusing to meet Buffy’s eyes. “Oh god, Willow.” Buffy choked as she allowed herself a little rest. If she was going to beat Warren into a whole new shape, then she’d have to be fit and healthy. Fresh tears had formed in Xanders eyes and Buffy squeezed his hand gently, turning to Tara she found herself at a total loss for words.

When her mother had died, Tara had been incredibly supportive and Buffy had found her remarkably easy to talk to, maybe it was because she had been through the same thing when she was younger, Buffy didn’t know, but now, in Tara’s hour of need, Buffy was finding it nearly impossible to find the right words. She leant forward, pulling Tara in close and hugging her tightly. “I’m so, so sorry. I don’t know what to say.” She whispered to the shaking blonde.
Tara had managed to hold back her tears but the raw emotion radiating from the Slayer was too much for her. “So am I.” she replied quietly, tears dropping onto the bare back of her friend. “I should have known better, I was selfish.” Tara sobbed into her hair.

Buffy stroked the sobbing woman's back parentally, “Shh, it’ll be…..” Buffy stopped mid sentence and pulled away, eying Tara cautiously, “Should’ve known better about what?” Buffy asked suddenly, her eyes fixed on the misty blue and tear streaked witch’s. Xander wiped his eyes with a tissue and stared at Tara.

“I t-t-think I screwed up.” Tara stuttered eventually, Xander rolled his eyes as Buffy's eyebrows raised. She knew that no matter what Tara was about to tell them, it probably wasn’t going to be good and although her every instinct as a Slayer told her that Tara had tried a spell that had possibly put them all in danger, her overriding love for her friends told her that Tara’s pain came first, whatever she had done was out of love.

Tara had only endangered them once before, but once was enough. “I think you’d better explain everything.” Buffy said softly, taking Tara’s hand in her own and trying to soothe her heartbroken friend.

[Ice]

Dark Willow emerged into the night, the magic throbbing in her veins and making her head spin. As her temper cooled slightly, Warrens final words echoed in her head, ‘why didn’t he remember the woods?’ the nearly sane part of her brain asked. Dark Willow had no answer for herself and frowned into the night, ‘he should remember, you shot him.’ Her brain told her, ‘that’s not one of those things you forget in a hurry and why isn’t he in the hospital?’ Despite her best efforts, Dark Willow had no logical or magical explanation. Warren was no way skilled enough to have removed that bullet, not by any means so why wasn’t he in the hospital, or better still, dead. “He is dead!” Dark Willow said aloud. The words not making the previous questions go away.
Dark Willow shook her head and a smile crept over her face as she pushed the doubts to the back of her mind. “One down!” she said as she strode towards the town centre.


Tara had come to the conclusion of her story and stood, her head hanging as her cheeks burned a deep crimson, waiting for the response of her friends. Buffy had sat up in bed and was now mulling over the information she had just received, no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t imagine a truly evil Willow, and from Tara’s encounter she knew that the Willow who had returned wasn’t the ‘hugs and puppies’ friend they all knew and loved.
Xander was the first to make some movement, walking slowly around the bed to Tara's side before hugging the woman affectionately. Under the cover of her blonde hair, Tara smiled weakly as he hugged her, the action speaking more than words ever could.
“So.” Buffy said suddenly, “We need to work out what went wrong and send this Dark Willow back to her reality?!” Buffy said, unsure as to whether she had just made a plan or asked a question. Tara's smile vanished immediately, whatever had happened, Willow was back, fair enough she wasn’t the same but even so, she was back and Tara wasn’t sure she was ready to lose her again. “Or we could just get her off the magic again!” Xander said, almost as if he’d read Tara’s mind. Buffy contemplated this option, like the others she didn’t want to have to lose Willow for a second time. “Could we do that?” she asked, directing the question more at Tara.

“Oh, t-t-the spell…” Tara said, tucking a stray lock of hair back behind her ear, “I kinda, well, I can’t do magic.” She told them sheepishly with a weak lop sided smile. Buffy opened her mouth to make an argument but Tara continued before she could speak, “I mean, the Spagnot demon took my magic as the price for returning Willow.”

Anya and Dawn had returned from the vending machine, slipping in unnoticed and hearing the entire story. “You should take it back!” Anya told her loudly. “You have a faulty Willow, you can get a refund!!” her aggressive cheerfulness and certainty made the others think.

“That’s true.” Xander said quietly. “He promised you something and didn’t deliver…. What??!” he finished off Buffy's look.
She shook her head, suddenly wishing Giles was there, he’d know all about the Spagnot demon and what they should do.


Dark Willow had searched everywhere for Andrew and Jonathan with no luck, her mind dogged her with questions and she was getting angry. She had turned the corner and was about to exit a small alley opposite the police station when a tall dark figure blocked her path. She stopped, her feet shoulder width apart, ready for a confrontation and stared at the form before her.

“Willow.” It said in a raspy voice, startling the dark witch momentarily. She stood in silence, waiting for the figure to continue. “This isn’t how it’s meant to be!” the figure told her as it looked around nervously.
Dark Willow raised her eyebrows, she could sense an incredible capacity for good radiating from the figure in front of her that seemed familiar and yet the creature was definitely a demon.

“Really?” she said, despite forming a question, she really wasn’t interested in having a conversation with this being.

“I know why you’re angry.” It said genuine sadness in its hoarse voice. “But you don’t need to be here, those reasons no longer exist.”

Dark Willows eyes swam in black, “I don’t need to be angry?” she asked it, “Then what do I need to be?” her voice was of venom, how dare this demon tell her what she needed. She needed to avenge Tara’s death and nothing and no one was going to stop her.

“You need to be Willow.” The demon said, taking a few large strides backwards, its voice shaking as it sensed the fury radiating from the witch before it.
In the blink of an eye, Dark Willow had closed the gap between them, her hands reaching for the demons throat and blocking off its airway.

“Willow doesn’t live here anymore!” she snarled for the second time since she’d been rudely interrupted from her revenge scenario.

Before she could go any further, a powerful bolt of rage hit her and she was flung back down the alley, landing firmly on her ass in a pile of rubbish. Getting rapidly to her feet, she charged back down the alley, dark magick crackling from her fingertips as she ran. Just inside the mouth of the alley, the demon was floating about 6 feet up in the air, the humungous hand of Osiris wrapped around its middle. “This is not your concern.” He bellowed at Dark Willow who raised both her hands and began casting a spell under her breath, before she had finished the incantation, Osiris vanished, taking the limp demon with him. “Fuck you Osiris!” she screamed into the night.


The large and unpleasant nurse had practically pushed the Scoobies from Buffy's bedside, telling them that they had to go and to come back tomorrow. Despite their pleas, she had ‘guided’ them into the lift and sent them on their way. They had driven back to the Summers’ house in near silence, no one quite sure what to say or how to deal with the news they had received. As Xander stopped the car in front of the neatly manicured lawn, Dawn jumped out, followed by Tara, then Anya and finally Xander. Dawn had rushed straight upstairs and slammed her door, she was confused and obviously upset. Willow’s dead. No, in fact she’s not but she is evil. We’re going to send her back to whatever dimension she came from. No we’re not. Dawn didn’t know quite where she stood or what was going to happen and didn’t feel capable of dealing with the conversation that was undoubtedly going on downstairs.

In the kitchen, Tara was fixing drinks for everyone while Anya sat at the counter absently playing with the bowl of popcorn in front of her. As Xander entered the warm room he looked at Tara.

“No magic at all?” he asked her, hoping that somehow she had regained it on the journey home.

“If Tara is right, Willow has enough magic for the both of them.” Anya offered. Xander said nothing but shot her a ‘shut up now’ look that caused her to roll her eyes and sigh, “It’s true!” she said, the hurt clear in her voice as she picked up the bowl of popcorn and disappeared into the living room.

“Tara?” Xander asked meekly as he occupied the seat that his girlfriend had just vacated. “What do we do?”

Tara turned to him and shrugged, “I don’t know, Xander.” She told him honestly, “I just don’t know.”

[Ice]

Dark Willow remained in the alley, her eyes swimming in black and her mind working overtime. ‘Why is Osiris so concerned with that pitiful demon?’ she questioned herself suddenly. “Why do I care?” she asked out loud. Her mind swum with all the information she had received in the last few minutes, each sentence placing more doubt in her mind.
From the far end of the alley, a trash can was knocked to the ground, making Dark Willow turn in surprise. Before her stood Clem, his floppy ears bobbing as he took the last final steps towards her. “Hey.” he said cheerfully, waving his hand in the air. Dark Willow glared at the demon who subconsciously took a couple of large steps backwards. “Willow?” he asked tentatively, “Is everything ok?” Dark Willow inhaled sharply as she seriously contemplated the question. “You know what Clem,” she said thoughtfully. “I don’t think it is!”


Xander and Tara had joined Anya in the living room, the three were sitting in silence watching ‘Cool Runnings’, Xander had had the choice this time around and had figured that they could all used a little cheering up. “Where’s Dawnie?” Tara asked Anya suddenly. Anya shrugged and continued stuffing popcorn into her mouth.
Sighing deeply, Tara stood and headed upstairs, she knocked on Dawns door and waited for a response. After almost a full minute, she pushed the door open a fraction and peered inside. Dawn was laying across her bed, her eyes still streaked with tears as she slept, her chest rising and falling rhythmically.

Truly alone for the first time that night, Tara's mind was catapulted back to the first time she and Willow had slept together, really slept together:
Willow had arrived at Tara's dorm room, candle in hand and the cutest look on her face. Instantly Tara knew she was about to be dumped, she had been almost convinced that Willow would go back to Oz from the minute he had arrived backing Sunnydale. His transformation into his wolfy self in the middle of the afternoon and the way Willow had rushed off to save him had nearly broken her heart. “No candles?” Willow had asked, “Well, I brought one, its extra flamey!” she had said as Tara pulled open the door to allow Willow inside. “Tara, I have to tell you….” Willow had begun before she cut her off mid sentence, her heart and soul not wanting to hear the words she felt sure were coming.

“No, I understand. You have to be with the p-person you l-love!” Tara told her, her eyes dropping from Willows to regard the candle.

“I am.” Willow told her simply, a warm, loving smile creeping over her lips as she spoke.

The words took a moment to really reach Tara, as they did her heart leapt into her throat; “You mean?” she asked hopefully.

“I mean!” Willow told her as her face broke into a grin, love radiating from her emerald eyes. “Okay?” she’d asked.

‘Oh yes!” Tara had replied with a grin, her head nodding enthusiastically.

“I feel horrible about everything I put you through, and I’m gonna make it up to you. Starting right now.” Willow had told her.
Had she heard right, “Right now?” she’d asked hopefully. Willows smile had told her everything.

Both women had been nervous, although she had slept with one other woman, Tara had never been in love, not like this and it felt like her first time all over again.
Willow had stepped in close to her, taking the candle from her hands and placing it on the bookcase behind her before returning, pushing her hair back behind her ears before placing a delicate kiss on the lips of the blonde. A million sensations flooded through Tara, the electricity in that kiss shot straight through her lips and down her spine causing her to shake as she returned the kiss. Feeling Willows arms wrapping around her shoulders, her fingers softly caressing the nape of her neck making her moan against Willows lips.
Willow had inhaled sharply, surprised at exactly how aroused the moans of the woman she loved had gotten her, and how quickly they had done so.

Willow had guided her back to the bed, her calves bumping against the soft mattress and forcing her to sit suddenly. Willow had sat astride her before continuing the kiss, her tongue gingerly pushing past her lips to begin a sensual dance of passion with Tara's own.
She had felt as though her bones no longer had the strength to hold her up and had fallen back onto the bed, pulling Willow down on top of her. “W-we don’t have to, if you’re not r-ready.” Tara had told her softly, but the lust and desire radiating from her true love confirmed that she did, in fact, really want to.

“I’m ready!” Willow had told her, her voice shaking slightly partially with nervousness, partly with desire. Tara smiled sweetly, never in all her life had she been so glad to hear two simple words.
Willow smiled back, her hands reaching for Tara’s top and sliding it slowly over her head, revealing a plain black bra encasing her beautiful bosom. Her fingers had traced so gently around the edges of the material, Tara's nipples immediately jumping to attention under the feather light touch.

Willows eyes bore deep into the exposed skin of the woman soon to be her lover, she had wanted to remember every inch of her body, every freckle and pore. Her other hand and absently slid across Tara's throat, hardening her already stiffened nipples further and drawing another soft moan as she tilted her head back, inviting Willow to kiss the sensitive flesh, an invitation she accepted eagerly.
Willow had fumbled with the catch of Tara's bra, both hands shaking badly as they tried to release the hooks. Tara had broken the kiss, her own hand sliding up her back and popping the hooks with ease. Willow blushed deeply, suddenly embarrassed by her incompetence, Tara had said nothing, she smiled sweetly, placing four small kisses on the neck of the red head before whispering, “It’s really ok.”

Willow had beamed, her embarrassment quickly forgotten, she had laid Tara back, kissing her deeply, her tongue exploring Tara's mouth as her hand tentatively caressed the soft flesh of her left breast. Tara's hips had pressed up into Willow, eliciting a soft moan from the red head as she stroked the hardened nipple fondly before pinching it between her fingers. Tara felt the dampness between her thighs growing stronger and growled into Willows mouth.
Willow had pulled back, a look of startled horror on her face. “Oh god, did I hurt you? I didn’t mean to, I’m so sorry.” She had looked around the room like a trapped animal looking for an escape route. “I should have known I’d be really bad. I’m sorry, I’ll leave, it’s ok, I understand.” Willow babble-age was a strange turn on for Tara, the young witch looked so innocent and afraid something in her made her want to wrap her in a hug until all the nervousness went away.

At the time, Tara had been stunned, Willows fingers had been working her into a fine frenzy before she had stopped and begun babbling. Tara sat up slowly, “Whoa. Willow?” she had asked, her voice heavy with desire and unfulfilled passion. “You’re leaving!?” she realised as she saw Willow rushing for the door.

“I’m sorry, I was bad, I hurt you?” Willow said, the statement had rapidly become a question as she saw Tara’s face fall, her brow furrowing deeply. “Y-you don’t want me to?” Willow had asked. Tara stood up, backing Willow up against the door and kissing her, trying to pour every feeling she was experiencing into that one kiss. “What do you think?” she’d purred as she lifted Willow off her feet, pushing her back into the door and nibbling softly on her neck. Willows legs had wrapped around her waist and she wasted no time lifting the shirt from Willow and tossing it to the floor, along with her bra that followed seconds later. As she had greedily engulfed one of Willows swollen nubs in her mouth, Willow had gasped in surprise.

“Tara?” A voice whispered. Tara couldn’t recall Willows voice ever being that deep, even in the height of passion. “Tara!” she was being shaken by Xander who had come up to use the bathroom. Lost in her memory, she had failed to register his arrival. Her mind tried desperately to stay lost in the memory but Xander had a firm grip on her arm and was shaking her urgently. “What?” she’d asked, a little sharper than she meant. The young man recoiled slightly. “I just…. Are you ok?” he asked, his concern obvious.

Tara shook her head, “I guess.” She contradicted with a weak smile as she wandered into the bedroom she had once shared with her soul mate. “I’ll get you back Willow.” She told a picture that stood on the dresser. “I’m going to save you from what you have become!” he picked up the framed photographed and kissed the lips of her lover. “I promise!”

[Ice]

Without warning, Dark Willows mind had filled with the memory of the first time she and Tara had slept together. How she had fumbled with the other woman's bra, and tried to run when she mistakenly thought she had hurt Tara, how supportive she had been as she called her back before carrying her to the bed, nipping and licking her nipples all the way before making love to her.

“Er, Willow?” Clem had said gingerly, “Do you need help of something?” he asked as the memory vanished almost as quickly as it had arrived.

From the second Tara had been shot, Willow had felt the psychic link between them smash, their collective thoughts, hopes and dreams had been lost in that second. But this memory, his wasn’t just a memory, this was Tara's memory, in it she could see herself from Tara's perspective. That only happened with Tara!

Dark Willow felt a small tear sting the corner of her eye, wiping at it fiercely she regarded Clem who was growing more nervous by the second, “Let’s get some chicken.” Dark Willow said to him thoughtfully, “I think you might be able to help me.” A smile crossing her lips and threatening to crack the skin as she placed her arm around his shoulders and walked him into the moonlight.


“Ahn?” Tara said as she re-entered the living room, “Could you do a locator spell?” Both Anya and Xander looked up at her, then at the clock and back to Tara.

“Now?” they both asked in unison. Tara looked surprised, gazing at the clock, she realised it was almost 2am. The time had flown by since they had returned home and she had no idea where it had gone.

“ Well, okay, not now. Tomorrow maybe?” Tara asked, her mind trying to forge specific details of a plan.

Anya nodded slowly, “I guess.” She said, yawning and resting her head on Xander’s shoulder. Tara nodded her thanks and returned to her room without another word.

Once she had closed the large door behind her, Tara pulled out the heavy mahogany chest and searched through it carefully, “It’s here somewhere. It has to be.” She whispered. Pulling items out of the trunk one by one, she smiled softly as the memories of some of the spells she has cast with Willow flooded her thoughts. One of Willows shirts had been thrown in there at some point and she pulled it out, shaking it gently. The transparent red material fluttering out before her, Tara felt tears flood her eyes. Willow had been wearing this on the day they had cast their first major spell together, Tara remembered it like it was yesterday, although the event was over two years past.
Buffy and Faith had switched bodies and Willow had travelled to the nether realm, in the process they had conjured a katra that would return the Slayers to their respective bodies. In the casting of that spell, they had learnt more about themselves and their sexuality than either one had though possible, the sexual charge between them had sent Willow over the edge, tipping her to the point of climax and leaving both women sweating, shaking and stunned.


Dark Willow was walking through a reasonably quiet cemetery with Clem, she had treated him to a bucket of fried chicken and they found a quiet bench to sit on as they ate.
Clem’s nervousness was not helped by the stoic Dark Willow. He liked Willow, her energy and charismatic charm made him feel safe and accepted, but this woman now sitting beside him lacked the humanity and love that radiated from the Willow he knew. He was eager to find out what had caused the change in her but was too cautious to ask. The dark power that crackled around her made his skin twitch, and that was a lot of twitchy skin for one demon! Instead he tucked into the chicken that the dark witch had generously provided, after a couple of wings, he plucked up enough courage to ask her, turning his head slightly it was clear that Dark Willow was lost in thought. ‘She looks so sad’ he thought, fighting the urge to reach out and hug her.

The inward eye,
The sightless sea,
Ayala flows through the river in me.

She whispered into the night, her right hand making a small semi circle on the bench next to her. “Uh, okay.” Clem whispered back, his every sensible instinct telling him to run but the overriding fear freezing him in place. Dark Willow made no response to him,

The inward eye,
The sightless sea,
Ayala flows through the river in me.

She whispered once again, a single tear falling from her cheek. Clem stood, sensing that when she snapped back into reality, she wasn’t going to be pleased about showing that sort of emotion, and slipped off into the shadows.

The inward eye,
The sightless sea,
Ayala flows through the river in me.

Dark Willow whispered for the final time before the memory and images were ripped from her mind, throwing her back into the reality of the dreary graveyard. Willow howled into the darkness. “I will kill you!!” she snarled at the moon. “That bastard took her and now you’re tormenting me. I will kill you!!!”

From his safe spot behind the Alpert crypt, Clem sighed, the murderous look that had consumed Dark Willow made his skin crawl and he was glad he’d left when he had. Slipping though the shadows, he rushed back to Spike’s crypt, thankful for somewhere reasonably safe to go for the night.
Sunnydale was not going to be fun this evening!


Tara finally found what she was looking for. A large bronze coin. She placed it carefully on top of the spell book she had been using earlier in the day and inhaled deeply. “Tomorrow.” She said simply, shaking out of her clothes before sliding into bed, eventually falling into a fitful sleep.

Dark Willow stalked along the main street of Sunnydale, her destination? The woods. A group of ‘new’ vampires stalked along behind her checking out their possible date prospect in the woman ahead of them as well as dinner plans. Dark Willow knew they were there, she hadn’t even sensed their presence, their childish giggles and comments about her ass had given them away as soon as she’d left the cemetery.

“Hey baby!!” one of them yelled. Dark Willow rolled her eyes and turned to face him. “You wanna play with daddy tonight?” he continued, apparently trying to sound sexy and failing dismally. Dark Willow beckoned him over, his undead friends whooping and cheering in delight as Dark Willow teased the vampire before her, her lips inches from his own and her hands trailing up and down his body. As his face reverted to its unnatural form, he growled gently, “Daddy’s gonna taste you.” He told her, a toothy smile exposing the saliva coated fangs.

Dark Willow raised on eyebrow as the young vamp grinned at her. She slid her hands quickly back up his body one coming to rest on either side of his head she allowed herself a rare smile before twisting his head with such ferocity it spun through 360degrees and dusted in her hand. “Who’s ya daddy now?” she purred as he dusted at her feet.
“C’mon boys!” she yelled to his friends who had quit their jeering and were stood agape. “You wanna play too?” they shook their heads before turning tail and sprinting down the street.
Dark Willow glared after them before turning back and resuming her stalking towards the woods.

The Spagnot demon was hanging from large, rusty hooks that Osiris had thrust through his cracked skin, the floor at least 10 storeys below him. His ability to speak had been ripped from his throat by the gate keeper and he had been hanging for so long that he had become delirious.
“You think she likes her new Willow?” Osiris bellowed into the Spagnot’s ear. The demon made no movement, made no effort to shield his ears from the deafening roar. “I like her new Willow!” the gate keeper continued. “She will be fun, especially since you can’t help them!” he finished before laughing a laugh that would have chilled the devil himself.

[Ice]

Dark Willow watched a young fawn skipping playfully in the rising sunlight, its mother watching protectively a few feet away. “Cute!” Dark Willow whispered as she made one fluid motion with her hand causing the small creature to collapse on the ground, its throat slit and oozing blood into the grass.
Standing up she crossed the space between her and her ‘ingredient’ the fawns mother scattered into the undergrowth as she crashed through the shrubbery.

Anya and Xander had both fallen asleep on the couch the previous evening, the popcorn had spilt from their laps in the night and coated the floor like snow. Dawn was the first up, emerging from her room into the hall way she stretched and yawned. Her mind was still buzzing with all the events of the past day but with a good nights sleep behind her, things looked clearer. She padded down the stairs and smiled fondly at the sleeping couple on the sofa, a small trickle of drool hanging from the corner of Xanders mouth caused her to shake her head, “Kids!” she laughed quietly as she headed for the kitchen to begin breakfast.

Tara sat bolt upright in bed, looking down at her hands, her brow furrowing when she saw no trace of blood on them. “Willow?” she asked the empty room. “Just come home and we can sort everything out.” she said, hoping that Dark Willow could hear her and would believe in her once again.
Dark Willow heard Tara’s voice clearly in her head. “You’re not her.” she said out loud as she spun herself into a tornado and out of the clearing.

As Tara forced herself to get out of bed the smell of fresh coffee and pancakes filled the house. She smiled and threw on a pack of jogging bottoms and a t-shirt before pulling the door open and heading downstairs.
Xander had awoken almost as soon as Dawn had lit the stove. Usually he slept like a log but if someone started cooking or even poured a bowl of cereal, he would be up and in the kitchen in seconds. As Tara entered the warm kitchen, Xander was merrily tucking into a huge pile of slightly overcooked pancakes. “Mormim!” he said as Tara came in and sat beside him. Dawn playfully slapped him with the spatula, “Don’t speak with your mouth full!” she told him, adopting her best ‘stern parent’ tone. “Morning Tara.” she said as she slid a large plate in front of the blonde witch. “Morning Dawnie, Xander.” she smiled as she dug into the pancakes piled on the plate before her.

A huge purple and black storm had filled the small clearing where Dark Willow had created her circle and cast her spell. The tortured howling of a thousand forgotten souls burned the air around her, making her ears sting and her eyes swim.

A heavy thud broke the swirling wind and screaming and Dark Willow stood before the slumped body of the Spagnot demon. She kicked it gently with her toe. “Get up!” she ordered. The demon lay perfectly still and Dark Willow suddenly wondered if it could be dead, poking it again with the toe of one dark boot, the demon moaned softly. Dark Willow felt her eyes swim in black, “Get Up!! NOW!” she yelled at the demon who could only groan in agony on the floor in front of her.

Resigning herself to the fact that the demon wasn’t going to do as it was told, Dark Willow leant down and grabbed it by the throat, lifting him into the air, his feet dangling lifelessly a foot from the floor.
“Why?” she asked it as its eyes tried to focus on the woman holding it aloft. “Why are you torturing me?” Dark Willow demanded. The demon managed to look confused, its face swollen and bloodied. Dark Willow had the faint memory that this was a demon that could alter time to return the dead, she looked quizzically at the creature. “Osiris.” she said, giving him no explanation for her actions. “But. No!” Dark Willows eyes flooded with their natural green. Shaking the demon to try and keep it conscious, she found the life force draining slowly from the sorry figure. Her left hand plunged towards its chest, drawing from it the power of its magicks, “Waste not, need not.” she told him as she felt the new magic surging through her, she was just about to drop the near-dead creature when one final burst of magic shot into her, it was pure, white and honest. Tara’s magic!


As the Scoobies left the house, Tara felt odd. She couldn’t quite put her finger on what was wrong but something felt, well, odd. They piled into Xander’s car and, after dropping Anya off at the Magic Box, headed towards the hospital. Anya had promised to try the spell that Tara had shown her that lunchtime.

As Xander found a parking spot in the hospital and turned off the engine, he turned to Tara, his face a picture of concern. They had never been really close in the early days, if he was honest, he didn’t really understand her but over the past two years, they had bonded closely, much to Willows delight. “Tara?” he asked her softly, “Are you okay?” A small frown furrowed her brow as she faced him, contemplating the question. “I just don’t know.” she replied honestly as she pushed the door open and stepped out of the car. They rode the elevator in silence, the cheerful ‘ping’ announcing they had arrived on Buffy’s floor.

Walking past a handful of doctors they caught a brief snatch of the conversation; “Its unheard of.” one had said, clearly astounded. His colleagues nodded in agreement. “I’ve never seen a wound like that heal so quickly!” another was saying. Tara and Xander looked at each other and smiled, “Buffy's better then?!” Xander whispered as they reached the room she had been in the previous evening. On pushing open the large door, they found it to be empty.

A young doctor approached them, clearing his throat to get their attention. “Are you looking for Miss Summers?” he asked politely, both Scoobies nodded. “She’s gone to a shared ward. If you’ll follow me?” he turned and started off down the corridor. “How is she doctor?” Tara asked, already knowing the answer. Slayer healing power and the comments of the doctors had told Tara everything she had needed to know but to try and keep things as normal as possible she had felt she should ask. “Well, it’s remarkable really.” he started, his face a mixture of amazement and joy, “The wound is almost completely healed and her vital signs are off the charts, it’s like nothing has happened to her really!!” he beamed with pride, his belief in the world of modern medicine was seriously misplaced in this case.

Xander and Tara giggled quietly as he showed them into a large ward with 8 beds in it. They saw Buffy immediately and thanked the doctor quickly and hurried to her bedside. “Hey Buff.” Xander said as he threw himself onto her bed and helped himself to a handful of grapes on the small table. “How ya doin’?” he asked between mouthfuls. Buffy rolled her eyes playfully as the young man ate the fruit. “Do you ever not talk with your mouth full?” Tara asked him, the memories of breakfast rushing back to her. He adopted a look of mock hurt before shoving another handful of the small green fruits in his mouth and grinning, each grape showing like a shiny green tooth.
Buffy punched him in the arm as she laughed. “So?” she asked Tara, “What’s happening with the spell?” her voice had dropped to a whisper so as not to be heard by the other patients.
“Anya’s doing it.” Tara told her, a hint of disappointment swimming in her eyes. “We’ll know soon enough.” she said. “How about you, sounds like you’re giving these doctors plenty to talk about!” Tara said with a giggle.

Anya had just finished the incantation for the spell that Tara had prepared for her, a strong wind swirling through the training room made the former demon shiver, the hairs on the back of her neck and arms standing upright. As it built into a whirling dervish before her, she felt the air being sucked from her lungs and she hoped that it would be over soon. No sooner had that thought entered her mind than the wind stopped and silence filled the room. Anya sighed deeply, just glad to be able to use her lungs again. On the floor at her feet lay the broken, lifeless body of the Spagnot demon. “This isn’t good!” she said into the silence.

[Maccoda]

WOW! This is one hellava ride you have us on. It would have been the perfect premier for that unmentionable season I refused to watch.

[Krokador]

Woah, sat for a while, interrupted too often to my own liking, but still sat and read it and I'm like all woah! Where have you been hiding with that talent all that time huh?

I live the idea of the two dimensions, one where tara died, and the other where Willow died. And i just loved the way Tara reacted. It was so... tara And the dark willow is also very dark-willowy, I've seen her sometimes becoming all soft at a finger snap, which felt kinda wrong and way too easy, but you've kept her the same old real bad willow and now I'm just wondering what she will do with tara's power.

Keep it up! The way you've talked about it, it's a finished work, so hurry up and finish posting it already!!

[AlysonGoddess]

uhm wow im really liking where this is going! tho i think i would have put more willow and tara interaction in the begiinning just because thats what im here to read and so sometimes i just skip through a lot of the parts to find something with willow and tara.. so just for future refrence more willow and tara connections please!! thanks!
Erin

[Ice]

Hey Erin!

Almost every other fic I've written is real heavy with W/T connecting goodness but this is really just an odd effort that not many folk like, obviously for that reason. I just wanted to dip a foot in the Kitteny waters and see what you guys thought. I will post some other stuff later on thats more connecty


Krokador: Im so glad you like the way its going. I adore Dark WIllow but shes really hard to write, well for me she is but, like you, i've read fics where she does kinda roll over and play dead and well, thats not DW!!! I love her coz shes pig headed and stubborn and wont believe whats right in front of her and she has that never say die attitude. I just hope that I've done her justice in this.

Maccoda: Wow!!!! Now theres praise indeed! Thank you so much!


Right, off to have a bit of an edit and a fiddle and then post the rest!!

Thanks everyone for your feedback and comments! I'm all kinds off woohoo now, the kitten board is a pretty daunting place to be posting fic coz there's so many really talented folk here so Im really glad you like my oddness and gave me a chance!!

[Ice]

“So, unless they can find a reason to keep me in, I should be able to come home tomorrow.” Buffy had told them triumphantly. Both Tara and Xander grinned.
Behind them a small, pretty nurse entered the ward, “Visiting hours for this morning will shortly be over. If you’d all like to start saying your goodbyes….” she told them apologetically. Buffy and Tara grinned at Xander, his jaw had almost hit the floor on the nurses arrival and he had made no attempt to hide it.
As Buffy jabbed him in the ribs, his mouth slammed closed with an audible pop, she waggled her eyebrows at him suggestively, “If Anya sees you….” she started before he feigned a look of mock terror.

“Oh god!” he said, his head dropping into his hands. The very thought chilled him. Buffy and Tara laughed as the young man shook his head slowly in his hands.

Since stealing the magic from the Spagnot demon, Dark Willow had felt, well, odd. Something inside her was fighting her fury, trying to desperately calm and soothe her. In the faces of the people she had passed since emerging from the woods, she had seen Tara. Every laugh and smile had been reflected in their eyes. The death of the Spagnot and the events after had convinced Dark Willow that it was Osiris who was responsible for her constant seeing of Tara.
As she walked, trying to fight the feelings inside and formulate a plan, Dark Willow found herself outside the Summers’ home, the large tree out the front provided a welcome shade from the hot Californian sunshine and she paused briefly, looking up at the building, she felt a sudden urge to check to see if Tara was actually inside. As she took a few steps up the path, she shimmered slightly, making it more difficult to be seen in case any of the houses residents happened to look out of the window.
As she reached the porch, her heart, which she was convinced had frozen over in the second that Tara had died, screamed at her; “Go inside, wait for me, I’ll be home soon.” Tears sprung to her eyes, her heart had developed Tara’s voice.

Xander and Tara had left the hospital and were pulling up outside the Espresso Pump. The radio which was having a ‘good day’ and working properly, filled the car with the tones of Def Leppard’s ‘When Love and Hate Collide’, Xander had reached out to change the station as it had begun but Tara insisted she didn’t mind.

You could have a change of heart,
if you would only change your mind
Instead of slamming down the phone girl, for the hundredth time
I got your number on my wall, but I ain't gonna make that call
When divided we stand babe, united we fall
Got the time got a chance gonna make it.

Tara’s mind drifted to Willow, or the Dark version she had encountered a few days before, she wondered what she was doing and why she hadn’t believed that she wasn’t dead.

Dark Willow remained frozen in place, the torture of hearing Tara's voice and not being able to see her, hold her and tell her exactly what she meant to her stabbed at her soul. Tara’s voice had been replaced and in her head she could now hear the lyrics to a song she vaguely recognised.

Got my hands on your heart gonna take it
All I know, I can't fight this way
You could have a change of heart, if you would only change your mind
Cause I'm crazy 'bout you baby, time after time.

Xander was about to kill the engine when Tara gasped, stopping him in his tracks. “Tara?” he asked, his hand reaching out for her arm.

“I’m in her. My magic, t-that’s why I felt odd.” she blurted out, leaving a blank look over Xander’s face. Turning to look at him, she realised he had no clue what she was talking about. “Willow!” she said. “Leave the radio on.” Xander nodded and stepped out of the car, whatever Tara was experiencing was giving him the wiggins.

Without you
One night alone
Is like a year without you baby
Do you have a heart of stone
Without you
Can't stop the hurt inside
When love and hate collide.

Tara’s breath came shallow and ragged, her heart pounding in her chest, a single tear falling from her smoky blue eyes.

Dark Willow lost feeling in her legs, the white magic doing battle within her buckled her legs and forced her to remain at the home she had once shared with her soul mate and closest friends. “Tara?” she croaked, the sudden realisation that she must have been stripped from her own reality hitting her hard.

I don't wanna fight no more,
I don't know what we're fighting for
When we treat each other baby, like an act of war
I could tell a million lies and it would come as no surprise
When the truth is like a stranger, hits you right between the eyes
There's a time and a place and a reason
And I know I got a love to believe in
All I know got to win this time.

“I know I got a love to believe in!” she told herself, “Tara.”

Tara leapt from the car and ran. Her heart screaming at her to find and confront the dark version of her lover, to try and make her see sense no matter what the cost. She burst into the Magic Box, making the handful of customers who were browsing the merchandise jump. “AHN!!” she called out. Anya’s head appeared from behind the shelving unit at the far end of the shop. “Spagnot!??” she said, her tone leaving little doubt in the former demons mind that she wanted the abridged version. “Dead!” Anya yelled back. Tara spun and headed out into the sunlight, her legs carrying her faster than she had ever run before.

Without you
One night alone
Is like a year without you baby
Do you have a heart of stone
Without you
Can't stop the hurt inside
When love and hate collide.

The magic inside Dark Willow forced itself into her very being, flooding her mind with memories of Tara. How Tara had left because of her abuse of the dark magicks, how she had kicked the habit, not just for herself but for Tara.

The blonde witch sprinted through town, her legs burning and shaking as she ran. She turned into Revello drive and allowed herself to slow a little, her mind trying to remember the final verse of the song.

You could have a change of heart,
if you would only change your mind
Cause I'm crazy 'bout you baby...Crazy...Crazy
Without you
One night alone
Is like a year without you baby
Do you have a heart of stone
Without you
One night alone
Is like a year without you baby
If you have a heart at all
Without you
Can't stop the hurt inside
When love and hate collide.

Dark Willow stood, her heart threatening to burst clear from her chest. “Who died?” her mind suddenly asked her. “I did.” she told herself in a hoarse whisper before shimmering out of sight.

Tara could see the house and her legs regained momentum. On the porch something shimmered, she had initially registered it as heat rising from the porch but it only appeared to be in one centralised spot.
As she reached the end of the path, the shimmering appeared to have a more human form. She took two steps onto the path, her mouth opened to form the words, but it was too late, the human shimmer vanished.
“Willow!?!” Tara yelled into the sunshine before sprinting up the path and throwing herself into the house.

[Ice]

whoops! Posted same chapter twice... Dunno why but cant see a delete option...

[Ice]

Tara collapsed in the hallway, she knew she had missed Dark Willow by seconds and the near miss hurt her heart almost more than she could bear. The song had made her realise exactly how she would get Willow back. A small spark fluttered in her soul, it was the tiniest of sensations but she felt it all the same. Taking some huge breaths, Tara managed to compose herself and find her feet once more, she headed for the kitchen and fixed herself a glass of water. As she drank, she moved into the lounge, clicking on the television before slumping on the couch.
The news filled the silent house, a plump man delivering the usual depressing headlines.

“Finally, the remains of a male found in the back alley behind ‘Willy’s Bar’ have been identified by pathologists as 21 year old Warren Mears. Police are still investigating the circumstances surrounding his death.”

Tara inhaled sharply, her mind racing. ‘Warren killed Buffy.’ It told her. ‘Warren killed Willow’ ‘Willow is evil’ ‘Willow didn’t die.’
“Oh goddess.” Tara exclaimed, dropping the glass to the floor. “I died.”


Dark Willow had a hideous flashback, she was stood in her room with Tara, they had kissed briefly and Tara had noticed Xander’s arrival at the house, there had been some shouting in the yard and shots had been fired. Tara stared at her in mild surprise, an ugly red smear spreading across her plain blue sweater. “Your shirt!” she said, before falling to the floor.

Dark Willow choked on a sob that stuck in her throat, her tears falling as freely now as they had done then. The white magic that she had gained from somewhere, she could only imagine it had been within the Spagnot demon when she drained him, danced in her heart. “I’m confused.” Dark Willow said as she reappeared in her bedroom. She had had no idea where she going when she’d shimmered herself from the porch and her heart had evidently lead her to where she belonged.
She felt her eyes burn a deep and bright green once again although she could still feel the anger and loss of Tara’s death within her, the tiniest strain of white magic told her she was wrong. She sat down on the floor and held her head in her hands. “Warren!” she realised suddenly, “I killed Warren.”

In the living room, Tara knew with all certainty that it had been Dark Willow who had killed Warren, she didn’t know how she knew, she just did.

For the rest of the afternoon, Tara sat in silence, trying to work out in her mind how she was going to deal with Dark Willow now that she had murdered another human. Could she still love someone who had murdered? She just didn’t know.

A little after 4pm, Dawn burst through the front door like a whirling dervish, her book bag was thrown against the coat rack and she rushed straight into the kitchen, unaware of Tara who was still frozen in place on the sofa. The telephone rang and she grabbed the receiver as she stuffed cold pizza in her mouth. “Heyo?” she asked, retrieving a pineapple chunk that had escaped her lips and throwing it in the bin.

“Hey Dawnie.” The voice on the end of the phone was painfully familiar yet Dawn couldn’t place it. The pain and rage that filtered through the handset burnt her ears and made her stomach flip somersaults with fear. She swallowed the pizza loudly. “H-h-hello?” she asked again, trying to convince herself she was mistaken about the identity of the caller.

“I’m sorry Dawnie.” the voice said again. “I blew it and now I have to say goodbye!” and with that the line went dead.

Dawn dropped the handset to the floor, her back sliding down the wall as her legs lost the strength to hold her up.


Dark Willow stepped from the phone booth into the warm afternoon sun, the dark magicks flowing through her had silenced the essence of Tara and she knew, without doubt that even if Tara was still alive in this reality then there was no way she could forgive her for what she had done, not only to Warren but to herself. Tara had been so proud of her when she had finally given up the magic and now that she had allowed herself to give in to the darkest of power, she knew that Tara wouldn’t be able to trust or accept her.
She knew what she had to do and she needed Prosepexa’s effigy to do it.


Dawn jumped when she saw Tara on the couch. “Tara. I. You.” the words fell from her mouth but she didn’t really know what to say. Tara looked up at her, a pain contracting her heart and making her weak.

“She thinks she has to end it.” Tara told her simply. Dawn stared at her, confused before nodding, her face bearing a quizzically confused expression that, at any other time would have made the blonde witch giggle.
“I have to make her see.” Tara said, the beginnings of a plan forming behind her blue eyes. She sprung from the couch, despite the stabbing pain in her heart she raced to the door, grabbing Dawns hand and dragging her into the afternoon light.

“You go to the Magic Box and get Anya to find out all she can on someone called Prosepexa.” Tara told her as they reached the end of the street.

“What are you going to do?” Dawn asked as Tara began running down the street. “I have to save her!” she told her simply, before sprinting off towards Xander’s construction site.

Dark Willow searched herself, trying to find the spell she would need. Without Tara she had no reason to go on, nothing left to live for. She had been given another chance, transported to another reality where the woman she loved was alive and well and she had blown it by refusing to believe her own eyes. Instead she had let the anger and dark magic control her. She had been weak and now she would be forced to live her life knowing that Tara was alive and there was nothing she could do to get her back.
Having wandered the woods silently she knew forgiveness was out of the question, Tara couldn’t live with her when she was over using magic, now that she had embraced the darkest of the dark and actually killed a human being albeit a murderous and misogynist human being, she was sure she had blown any tiny chance she had had with Tara.


Dawn burst into the Magic Box and found it devoid of customers. Anya was gazing lovingly at the money in the drawer as she entered. “We need to find information on, erm….” Dawn told her as she rushed towards the large research table, ‘Don’t let me have forgotten her name’ Dawn chastised herself. “Erm… Popavectra?” Dawn offered, shaking her head, “No, that’s not right. Erm….” she looked around the room, her mind searching for the right word.

Anya stepped out from behind the counter, studying the young woman with concern. “Dawn?” she asked, placing her arm on her shoulder, “What’s wrong?”
Tears swan in Dawn’s eyes, her frustration at not being able to remember one simple instruction infuriated her. “Prosavectra?” she tried again.

“Prosepexa?” Anya asked, the terror clear in her voice.

Dawn nodded slowly. “Is that bad?” she asked.


Tara had reached the construction site and despite being told she wasn’t allowed to go running around it without the correct safety gear she ignored the warnings and barrelled past many of the guys in her search for Xander. She found him amidst long pieces of wood, a tape measure in one hand and sucking thoughtfully on a pencil. “Xander!” she called, startling the young man visibly. “We have to go. NOW!” she grabbed his arm and dragged him towards his car.



Anya had found a large tome containing all the information they would need on Prosepexa. “Look at this.” she said to Dawn, pointing to the page before her.
“Prosepexa, she’s way up there in the hierarchy of she-demons.” Anya read aloud as Dawn stared down at the page. “Her followers intended to use her effigy to destroy the world! But they all died when the temple was swallowed in the earthquake of ’32.”

“Where was the temple?” Dawn asked suddenly.

“Oh, up on King Man’s Bluff.” Anya said, looking up as Tara and Xander entered the store, in one hand Tara held a small plastic bag, announcing she had been shopping in HMV.

“What have you got?” she asked as she approached the table.

Anya frowned at the bag before Dawn jumped in, “So Willow thinks she has to destroy the world?” she asked incredulously.

Anya continued; “She’s going to drain the planets life force, funnel its energy through Prosepexa’s effigy and burn the earth to a cinder.”

The Scoobies look around at each other slowly, each pair of eyes coming to rest on Tara who was shaking her head. “No, not the world. Herself.”

Anya frowned, looking back to the book once more she said slowly. “The incantation, its time sensitive. At sunrise it will destroy the earth…. Oh!” Everyone stared at her, waiting for her to finish.

“Ahn?” Xander asked, crossing to stand next to her. The former demon said nothing, staring at the book in front of her. He peered over her shoulder, “Oh God!”

Both Tara and Dawn called in unison; “What??”

Reading from the page before him, he spoke slowly his voice shaking as he read: “If the incantation is performed as the sun sets, then whoever casts it will suffer the torture of the earth.”

Everyone drew a collective breath as the information filled them with fear and dread.

[Ice]

Dark Willow stood on the top of King Mans Bluff, the rapidly setting sun bathing the area in a warm pink glow. Before her, the spire of the ancient temple rising from the ground, Prosepexa’s effigy clearly visible. She inhaled deeply, the tiny Tara spark within her had been suppressed by the powerful dark magic that flooded her system. She knew that the spell she was about to cast would end everything, free her from the torture she was to face if she remained in this coil.
Inhaling deeply, she took one final look down at the town she had once called home, the Bronze, the half finished status of the new Sunnydale High, and the house in which her whole life had been ruined and completed on many occasions.


The Scoobies rushed for the door, Tara had explained her plan to them as quickly as possible and despite mumbled complaints from Anya, there seemed no other way.
Xander pushed his foot to the floor causing the car to lurch violently forward, within minutes they had arrived outside a neat driveway, an ice cream truck parked in the drive. Xander leapt from the car, popping the hand break on the vehicle, he and Anya pushed it backwards into the street. Tying the tow rope onto the front of the vending vehicle, Anya jumped in and immediately began casting a small spell under her breath as she plugged a portable cd player into the cigarette lighter in the dash.
Xander returned to his car, “All set.” he said as he dropped into the seat and gunned the engine. The car, now with its own ice cream stalker, sped into the night and into an unknown fate.


Dark Willow cleared her mind, the only thing in her was dark magic and she concentrated on the spell. “From the pit of forgotten shadows.” she began, “Prosepexa. Let the cleansing fires from the depths burn away my suffering soul and bring sweet death!” She spoke, her eyes swimming in black once more.

Xander slowed slightly as they approached the peak of King Mans Bluff, they could see the deep purple magicks from Dark Willows spell swirling and crackling in the air and Tara yelled back to Anya in the ice cream truck. “Now!!” Anya nodded and pressed the play button on the cd player.

You could have a change of heart,
if you would only change your mind
Instead of slamming down the phone girl,
for the hundredth time.

The words filled the air from the loud speaker on the top of the truck, Dark Willow froze turning towards the sound. She saw the top of an ice cream truck rumbling up the hill. Shaking the memory of the song from her mind, the dark magic inside her drove her on. Focusing hard on the effigy, Dark Willow felt magic burst from her chest and fly into the statue before her.

I got your number on my wall,
but I ain't gonna make that call
When divided we stand babe, united we fall

“Hurry Xander.” Tara urged as she saw the emerald green bursts flying on the top of the hill. “We don’t have much time.”
As the car neared the clearing, Tara leapt from the front seat, her feet hitting the floor in a sprint.

As she burst into the clearing, her breath caught in her throat. Dark Willow stood in a circle of charred earth, her very essence fading as more bolts of green left her chest.

Got the time got a chance gonna make it
Got my hands on your heart gonna take it.

She walked purposefully towards the woman whom she had once known. Stopping just to the side of the effigy that was absorbing her fury and turning it back on her.

“Willow” she said, her words falling on deaf ears as she noticed the black swimming in the eyes before her.

All I know, I can't fight this way
You could have a change of heart,
if you would only change your mind
Cause I'm crazy 'bout you baby, time after time.

Taking a deep breath she stepping into the path of the magicks and Dark Willows attention snapped onto her.

“Willow, you don’t have to do this.” she whispered, her voice weak from the power that had just hit her.

Inside her, Dark Willow felt the tiny surge of white magic in her heart. “I can’t have you now. I have nothing, not without you” the dark witch told her.

Without you
One night alone
Is like a year without you baby
Do you have a heart of stone.

Tara shook her head sadly, her own anger surprising her. “So you think this is the best way to deal with it?!” she snapped. “Did you even bother trying to find out what I felt?” she continued.

Without you
Can't stop the hurt inside
When love and hate collide.

Dark Willow glared, Tara sounded so furious. She knew that Tara would never love her again, not the way she had before. Too much had happened in the last few days for things to ever be the same, and now here she was trying to stop her.
“Leave me alone, this is my decision!” she snarled, waving one hand and knocking Tara out of the way. Inside her, the white magic stabbed at her heart, causing her eyes to return to their natural green. A single tear falling as she, the old Willow who had loved and worshipped Tara, felt her heart break at the action.

I don't wanna fight no more,
I don't know what we're fighting for
When we treat each other baby, like an act of war
I could tell a million lies and it would come as no surprise
When the truth is like a stranger, hits you right between the eyes.

Tara got back to her feet, something in the Dark Willow before her had changed. “You can’t love me!” Willow told her, “Look at me, I’m everything you left me because of. You should hate me!”
Dutifully, Tara looked the other woman up and down before replying. “I don’t hate you Willow!” she told her, her voice softening.

There's a time and a place and a reason
And I know I got a love to believe in
All I know got to win this time.

The white magic in Willow surged, filling her throat with tears. “Don’t you get it, I killed someone, killed him deader than dead!?!” Willow growled, her hands falling to her sides.

Tara nodded, “I get it.” she said simply. “I understand.”

Dark Willow looked confused, “I’m nothing without you.” she said quietly as the white magic grew inside her, suppressing the darker power.

“We can work it out, Willow.” Tara told her softly, “I love you.”

Dark Willow shook her head, her fury building once again, “No, no you don’t. You left me because of magic and now…. look at me.” she demanded, striding across the gap between them to stand in front of Tara. “Look!!” she yelled, her hand grabbing Tara’s face and forcing her to look at her.

“I love you!” Tara told her again.

“You c-can’t!” Willow gasped, the sobs becoming clearer in her voice.

“The first day I met you, I knew you were special, you were honest and pure and good. I knew I’d love you no matter what!”

Tears ran down Willows cheeks, “You left me because of this!” she repeated, gesturing to the changes the magic had made to her.

“But I never stopped loving you!” Tara whispered, her mouth inches from the raven black lips of the woman she loved.

“You can’t! I…. It’s not….. But I kill…..” Willow blurted out, her words silenced as Tara leant in, closing the gap between their lips and kissing the witch softly.

Willow pulled back from the kiss, the white magic fully overpowering the dark force within her and her hair returning to its stunning red.

“I love you, Willow!” Tara told her.

Willow opened her mouth to protest but before she could utter a word, Tara’s lips found her own, kissing her roughly, her tongue sliding into her mouth as she pulled her closer. Tara felt her own magic course through Willows veins as they kissed. A full minute passed before Tara felt the familiar hands of her lover caressing the nape of her neck. She moaned softly into the kiss as she felt her Willow return fully.

Pulling back, Tara gazed lovingly into the sparkling emerald eyes before her. Willow smiled coyly her cheeks flushed with a mixture of love and shame.
“I love you too.” she said finally.

Without you
Can't stop the hurt inside
When love and hate collide.

THE END!

[spells42]

Hi! Just wanted to say I enjoyed the story. It was good to read a different take on the events of Seeing Red, and using alternate dimensions to 'fix' everything. And aren't you good to us, popping it out all in one go like that!

thanks
Anne

[Krokador]

ooooh I love that ending! Yay for Willow and Tara back together!!
And now you've made me want to find that song to actually listen to it

Can't wait to read some more of your stuff!

[AlysonGoddess]

uhm yay to the ending!!!! But now I would like to see what happens from here on ..sequel?
Erin

[DaddyCatALSO]

Yes! Good solid development with a believeable ending.
Juist two little details;since Xander now does cosntruction where'd the ice cream truck come from? And, what happened to the remains of this dimension's Original Willow?
^Those points don't actually hurt the story but they're the kinds of things some readers tend to notice.

[Ice]

Yes! Good solid development with a believeable ending.
Juist two little details;since Xander now does cosntruction where'd the ice cream truck come from? And, what happened to the remains of this dimension's Original Willow?
^Those points don't actually hurt the story but they're the kinds of things some readers tend to notice.

Im the worst one for those sort of wonderings but i kinda just figured that since the original dimensions WIllow was dead, then well they'd probably bury her! The original version of this had them all going to WIllows funeral but that was way too freaky even for me so I figured she could sit on ice for a few days and then I'd get to the end of the fic and see what it was I wanted to do from there.... and since they were together and happily ever afterthen thats all good.
Im not sure about protocol in the states for unclaimed bodies and so I left it the way it was.


I doubt there'll be a sequel. Im working on another fic based on an idea by Joss about Tara coming back but its not really Kitten board stuff as it does have JFK *spit* in it and starts with some of the stuff in TKIM.

I'll post other bits and pieces in future now that everyones been so nice! Its a whole lot less scary!! hehe

[Willow Watcher]

I LOVE IT BABE! I enjoyed it when I read it on EF and I still love it. Great story plot and a wonderful twist. YOU TOTALLY ROCK!

[WillowRulez]

Now that's an unique idea!!! Never read a take on the S6 finale like this.
Great story. Hope you will share more fics with us in the future

[DaddyCatALSO]

True;with a living Willow obviously there it'd be easy to call the girl found in the bedroom a Jane Doe. (Of course if she just vanished into the other diemsnion it might be easier on all concerned.)
And I know what you mean about other ideas. My "Willow's Quest" story (I have a beginning and end with no idea how to construct the middle) literally opens with a certain Unnamed Wealthy Hispanic Person looking out a window and making a decision as to what she wants to suggest to Willow.
And something I forgot to mention yesterday; I felt the flashback to their First Time was quite a bonus, and not for smutty reasons. It's gotten me to thinking again how many different versions of, not only that, but also the other early stages of their relationship, and the little things baout Tara's backstory, that writers here have been filling in. Each of us according to our own lights...actually, I'm glad a lot of this was elft ambiguous on the show. All these different versions, from different viewpoints, provide a wide variety of Food for Thought. And they do say "Eat a variety every day."

[Ice]

I know what you mean about having a beginning and an end... I often have a mental picture of something and then no clue how to go about making it into a fic!
The worst one I had was with the fic Im currently writing. I had one final scene in my head, clear as day but really had nowhere else to go but at the end!!! So I had to try and work out how the hell I was gonna get there! Luckily for me, it was a Tara imagine in a S7 scene so I sorta knew I'd have to bring her back!!!

I love how the writers left so much blank. Maybe they knew us fic writers would take their little hints at what had happened and run with them!? Everyone has a different view on everything so the fics just let us get a tiny glimpse into the minds of people as well as what W/T could be doing when we turn off our tvs! hehe.