Need a little help with that

[Candleshoe]

Aww, that was sweet.

You know, it should be compulsory for everybody to see your boobs once before they die.

All in favour, raise their hands:

[viximon]

waaa the goship that can fly about on a hospital

Poor Willow, wish Tara is avalaible again soon. Though Anya's intentions are so good she's still Anya, Willow's still Willow...

Keep the story up, I like it

[tarebear]

this is such a cute story... i can't believe i've missed that much already... i would love to see the flashback of just how willow found out if tara was gay and their first smoochy!

hope to see an update soon!

[WillowRulez]

Hihi, that flashback was incredibly cute!
Awww... Anya is so cool! Even (Did I write even???) if she insists on reading lesbian fiction.
Can't wait for more! I might be repeating myself but it's really nice to know that every day I come here there is an update from you! Makes me happy

[leipreachan11]

Well, sorry it's been so long (by my recent standards, anyway), but events have conspired against me recently. First, winter arrives in March so we get a whopping 5 centimetres of snow - in mountain regions, at least. Unfortunately, my cough then went to my chest. Then my boss asked me for my month's work. Then I sweated a lot and panicked and deleted half my files. And all this in a week - a week - without chocolate. I'm not in a good mood.

So. Here we are again, me against the (TV) world. Last time I checked, I didn't own much of anything to do with Buffy's extended family. But if you do, and you insist on suing me for borrowing said family, fine. Do it. Take my 302 business cards and one chewed pen.


Regardless of my possible future litigation worries, here I present to you...

Chapter 16

“Oh, sorry Tara, didn’t think anyone’d be here.” Xander stood in the doorway of Willow's room. “Weren’t you banned from visiting for the next couple of days?”

“Yeah, but my exams are always done by five, and she’s given her meds at four, so…”

“Ah, so you’ve been secretly slipping in? I never knew you were so sneaky.”

“There’s a lot of things you don’t know about me, Xander. I’m actually a government special agent, come to replace the Initiative in spying on the Scoobies.”

“I always thought you were a bit shifty-looking. Bet your name isn’t Tara either, huh?”

“If I told you my real one, you’d suffer grave consequences. Get it? Grave consequences.”

“A secret agent with a decent sense of humour, huh? Never met one of those before.” He lingered in the doorway.

“Come in, don’t stand there like a stranger.” Xander took a seat beside her. “So, how’s your arm?”

“Ah, healed. Scar’s not even big enough to make me look cool. Thank God Anya’s is hardly visible though. Her arm’s mostly better too, she gets the odd twinge but she was convinced for a while that they’d have to amputate her hand. She wouldn’t tell me the story, which is very unusual for her, but I think she had a flashback to her demon days. You don’t wanna know exactly how happy she was that she got to keep it. She ran a lot of tests to make sure she could still use it.”

“Probably info best kept private, but I’m sure you were happy to assist her in her medical experiments. So how are you two? I mean, I don’t want to pry, but you seem to be getting along.”

“We do, don’t we? I think it might have something to do with the shop. You know, she’s doing all these plans for it which is making her happy, then she’s also happy at me ‘cause I’m spending most of my free time helping her. And then I also feel good when I’m able to help because besides just putting stuff together, I can point out what can and can’t be done using real knowledge of the builder’s kind. And even the sex has changed – it’s not like she’s just feeling sorry for herself so she’d use any monkey, it’s more like she actually wants to do it with me specifically.”

Tara took his hand. “Xander, even when she was upset, I hardly think she would have gone out, tapped a random guy on the shoulder and said ‘do me’. She wanted it to be with you. We were all upset and turned to someone we knew could comfort us.”

Xander leaned back slightly and tilted his head to the right. He looked at her seriously, his brow crossed. “How are you so wise? I know now why Will was always saying how she loved to talk to you. I mean when we were younger, sure she told me most stuff, though I banned any talk of girly girly stuff when it hit a certain point. In fact she liked to do the therapist’s chair thing where one of us would lie down and talk and the other would listen and go ‘hmmm’ and ‘and how did that make you feel?’ But I’m pretty sure I was never as insightful as you. And you can get people to say what they really feel without being self-conscious. I mean, why aren’t you training to be a therapist? You’d be minted, people would brag about how they managed to book a table at Dr. Maclay’s.”

Tara blushed and looked down.

“No, don’t look embarrassed, I’m serious – and let’s face it, how often does that happen? You honestly should consider it.” He paused. “I mean, if anyone else would’ve asked me how are me and Anya doing, even Will, I would’ve said something like ‘we’re getting on fine’. You ask, and I tell you that I’m happy that I can finally do something useful around here besides make jokes.” Xander sighed softly. He looked thoughtful for a moment, and then continued, lowering his voice slightly. “You know, I’ve gone to confession – the poor man’s therapy – a few times just to tell someone how useless I feel when I’m surrounded by all these powerful people. I mean, sometimes I try to think of stuff that I add to the Scoobies besides being Anya’s orgasm friend. I’ve got two in six years: when we were fighting Angelus and I thought of the rocket-launcher, and when we were up against the Mayor and Buffy called me ‘key guy’ for arranging the students to fight him. And neither of those were really me because they were both a result of stuff that I remembered when I turned into a soldier at Halloween. How many times have I gone out patrolling and ended up on the ground while Buffy has to drag something off me as well as fight other demons? Christ, if anything, I’m a liability.” Xander hung his head, looking ashamed. “God, I’m sorry, you don’t need to hear this crap.”

Tara looked at Xander sadly and slowly took his hand. He seemed close to tears. She had of course noticed how he reacted when he was told off or dismissed in meetings, when Giles would say that he had managed to boil something down to its very basics, or when he was sent on a donut run, or told vaguely to ‘research’ something when everyone else had a specific and seemingly more important job. They obviously had no idea that it affected him as he covered with jokes, but a brief look of shame or rejection always crossed his face, if only for a second.

“You’re not useless, Xander. Fine, you might not have superpowers, but you’re still needed. Remember the adjoining spell you did to defeat Adam? You were the Heart, right? Okay, you might not be able to decapitate with your hands or disembowel with a spoon, but you’re still an important part of the group. And not just in the fighting evil sense, either, but as a friend. Willow loves you so much, Xander, and I know Buffy does too. And you’re like a surrogate brother to Dawnie. Right from the start when Willow and I became friends, I learnt all about the Scoobies. And she loved you all – she talked about how her life changed when she met Buffy. She spoke about Dawn like she was a sister, and she admired Giles so much – don’t tell her I told you, but when she was a bit tipsy one time she admitted that she had a huge crush on him when he first came. But it was you, more than anyone, that she talked about. She told me practically everything about you, about your lives together. How she’d fill in some questions on her maths exams wrong before you copied off her so that the teacher wouldn’t get suspicious when you got most stuff right, then when you were done she’d change the answers so the teacher wouldn’t be suspicious when she got most stuff wrong. How when she realised that she’d forgotten to take her tape of A Charlie Brown Christmas out of the video, you cut yourself with a fork in the kitchen and cried really loudly to distract her parents from the TV room while she got the tape. And all the times you defended her when people made fun of her, even though you’d end up being beaten up for it. How she was embarrassed because she thought she snored so because it sounded cuter, you used to pretend she talked about frogs in her dreams when she stayed over. Though I think we both know you weren’t pretending about that one.”

“Yeah, Buffy tells me that her dream topics have got a bit more mature over the years. Not just school and frogs, huh?” Xander smiled as Tara instantly blushed crimson.

“I have absolutely no idea what that means. Just remember, Xander, Willow needs you as much – more – than she does any of the Scoobies. And it may seem that she didn’t like Anya from the start, but that was only because she was terrified that she’d hurt you like she used to punish men. She knows now that she makes you happy, and when Anya isn’t telling us about her sex life, Willow’s happy for you.” Tears had welled up in her own eyes as Xander had gently started to cry.

He hugged Tara gently. “Thank you Dr. Maclay. I know now why Willow, quite rightly, loves you so much.” He didn’t even bother to backtrack as he knew how mutual the love was. “You want me to leave you alone with her?”

“No, I’d better go in case she wakes up and bans me from visiting for even longer. I’ll see you soon. And you know, if you do ever need to talk, I may not have a confessional in my room, but I do have a chair. And I can ‘hmm’ and ‘and how did that make you feel?’ with the best of them.” She squeezed Xander’s hand and left. Looking back from the door, she saw him smile at Willow as he took her hand, still crying softly.

[writerfreak]

i have honestly never seen a better portrayal of interaction between xander and tara. i really liked that. its great.

writerfreak

[Willowtree252]

more more please!!

[caz]

Why couldn't Joss Whedon have written stuff like that.

This was excellent, just how I would imagine Tara and Xander talking. Tara does seem to be able to get people to 'open up' to her.

Hey leipreachan11 - the weather here is crap too. I don't think i've been this cold in a long time. Somebody needs to tell the Arctic that it doesn't need to share its weather with us!

Can't wait for your next update.

Caz

[Candleshoe]

Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant. In fact, it was abso-flippin'-lutely brilliant.

[boball]

What they said...


I absolutely luv this fic. I got fired a couple days ago so Ive just been at home bored & reading the board. And I have to say that this is certanly up there with my top 5. ur so funny but at the same time you do the emotions and how they interact and think of eachother really well.
Theres so many quotes I could use, like Anya worrying about giant bunnies eating her money and Willow telling Buffy how Tara used to jump her. But I think my favourite is what i told my sister yesterday: that i had the galloping shites. She looked at me very strangely. I've learnt a wonderful new term!
Then of course, there's the fact that youre an updating wonder! And I hate bosses too, doing no work eventually bites you in the ass, as I've learnt recently. Bastards.

[leipreachan11]

Well, I'm back. A busy fortnight: the last two months' worth of work to be made up in a busy few days of endless brainstorming and article writing. And homework! Homework! A nervous, sweaty time which hopefully is over. All in all, an unusual March: work, nearly 3 weeks minus chocolate and snow on St. Patrick's Day.

So anyway, on with the tale. The usual disclaimers regarding the grey area that is my use of Buffyland apply.


Chapter 17


Willow groaned.

Buffy looked up from her magazine at the sound. “You alright?”

“Just thinking that I never, ever want to be in hospital again. You go into one minor coma and they want to ‘observe’ you for like forever. I’m fine! Plus you have one minor eye injury and you can’t read or watch TV!”

“Sweetie, think about what you just said. It may have been minor, but you were still in a coma. And it may have been small, but a shard of glass in your eye could do some pretty bad damage. Anyway, aren’t you out of here in a couple of days? Dr. Danny told me yesterday that patients very rarely recover as fast as you have from stuff like a zillion broken bones and muscle injuries and all that. He’s very proud of you and him. And Nurse Emy is very proud of you and her, she told me this morning that she’d been sending you a lot of positive energy and even prayed for you when she went to mass. Besides, your stay could’ve been a lot worse; didn’t a certain blonde spend a significant amount of time here? I don’t know what that means for you guys, but still. Plus you may not have been able to read yourself, but wasn’t Anya very nice bringing the books on maths theorems and all that crap? And I’ve never met anyone so willing to read gay porn out loud in a public place. You know, she looked up ‘porn on tape’ on ebay, but decided that you should probably have a limit as to how much erotic fiction you heard a day. Plus she enjoyed reading it to you.”

“Oh my God, I thought Xander was joking when he told me that. That’s very… considerate of her. And I know you’re right about staying here, it’s just that… Well, I know I’m not exactly Joe Workout when I’m at home, but I’m going mad lying here hardly moving for 3 weeks. And then I’ll need a wheelchair when I finally break outta here. Plus, I was in pretty good shape ‘til like a month before I was locked in here but I totally lost that. Put it all together and when I finally lose all the splints and casts I’m gonna be so unfit I can hardly walk.”

“Yeah, you were in pretty decent shape. Bagged a good few vamps when we went out together. Did you join a gym or something?” Buffy noticed Willow’s blush. “Ah, I see. Well, I guess that does count as exercise, especially when you worked out as much as you did... Anya’s pretty fit too, come to think of it.”

While Willow liked having company, even if they just sat quietly reading, like Buffy, they often interrupted her Tara daydreams, an important part of her day. That wasn’t to say she didn’t still have them, it was just that it could get awkward for her visitor if she let herself get totally immersed in memories of a certain genre - and it didn’t take much to remind Willow of something she and Tara did. At Buffy’s comment, Willow slipped off into the past again. They really had been an active couple, she and Tara, and pretty much anything could set them off.



“I have to learn to sew.”

“A valuable skill. As is knitting, you should learn that now in case you turn into an OAP tomorrow.”

“I’m serious. Look at this.” Willow held up the shirt she had worn that night for a grand total of half an hour. “I mean, we’re apart for 4 days, you see a cocktail involving whipped cream and 10 minutes later I’ve been pulled from the Bronze and 2 buttons remain on my former totally button-down shirt. In fact it should be you learning.”

“Yes, it did take an awful lot of persuasion to ‘pull you’ from the Bronze. And fine, so I might have damaged a few shirts in my time, but last week you managed to tear my belt in two.”

“That was a freak accident. I was only trying to loosen it. Buffy would be proud at how strong I’ve got. All our workouts I guess.”

“Yes, we’ve got very fit indeed. Who needs a gym when you’ve got a bed and a beauty?”

“Well, floors, tables, walls and bathrooms are also needed.”

“And who can forget counters?”

Willow turned to Tara, an eyebrow raised and a sleazy grin on her face. “Let’s test the bed again.”


“Where’s the headboard?” The next day, Buffy stood at the end of the bed, puzzled.

“Oh, yeah, that sorta broke,” Tara mumbled nervously.

“How? Wasn’t it made of like really thick wood?”

Willow came into the room to help Tara out. They’d only broken it that morning; they hadn’t had time to get their stories straight.

“Uh, we were trying to move the mattress. You know how they say you should turn it monthly. Well we do, but obviously not very successfully today, we probably should’ve asked you, what with you being all stronger than us put together but we didn’t want to bother you, I mean seeing as it's the first of the month you might’ve turned yours this morning and maybe even Dawn’s as well so you might’ve been all turned out ‘cause it’s not a particularly interesting activity. Though I suppose it’s not so much an activity for you as it is for us because you can probably lift it and whoosh! It’s turned. Takes us longer, obviously. Well, we know for the future to book you in advance.” Willow finished with a nervous high-pitched laugh.

Buffy nodded slightly. “Sure. I’ll pretend to believe that explanation as long as you get the headboard fixed and never tell me the truth.”

“Deal,” the energetic couple answered at once.

“Okay, I came in to tell you that me and Dawn are going to L.A. tomorrow. My dad has something he wants to tell us. I’m guessing someone’s pregnant, engaged or moving. We’ll be leaving in the morning, early. And dinner’s ready now. By that I mean the pizza’s here.”

“Down in two.”

Buffy left the room, sighing gently. How long had it been since she had someone to break the headboard with during lively morning sex?

[beanie]

DIBS

That is freaking hilarious. Sorry I've never commented before, I suffer from chronic laziness and I would get my pills for it, but they're over there. Somewhere.

I just want to say that this story gets better and better every time I read. I really like how the hospital staff has almost become liek a second family for Willow. It's a welcome change after reading so many stories where the doctors are like BOO HISS lesbians. Yay for Nurse Emy, she's hilarious. I also admire how you've brought together all of the gang after the horrific event. I mean even Willow and Anya are getting along! It's a not so Christmas miracle.

The part when Tara was Dr. Maclay was really touching. We rarely get an insight into the psyche of Xander and this was, well, it was really sad. But yay for Tara who makes everything better.

Who can also break headboards with energetic sex. WOWIE WOW, and also HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Fun it is the sex.

Can't wait for more!!

-beanie

[WillowRulez]

Waaaaaah! How could I miss TWO updates?? Well, one. Good that I checked the thread today.
Your portrayal of Xander is dead-on. Really liked the conversation with Tara. My fav part:

“No, I’d better go in case she wakes up and bans me from visiting for even longer. I’ll see you soon. And you know, if you do ever need to talk, I may not have a confessional in my room, but I do have a chair. And I can ‘hmm’ and ‘and how did that make you feel?’ with the best of them.” She squeezed Xander’s hand and left. Looking back from the door, she saw him smile at Willow as he took her hand, still crying softly.

Tara! Visiting Willow when she is totally drugged and asleep! Hihi
And the headboard.... do I need to say more?
Great as usual. Hope more updates soonish!

[Willowtree252]

I like this story alot cant wait for more.

[boball]

leip, I too once complained about being given too much work (by my stndards). Then I got fired and it isnt really an issue any more. But enuf about me- still lovin this fic. Nomatter how bad a headache you get outta it, breaking head boards is always fun.
More! (Id say screw your boss and give us more but Ive found out what happens in that scenario.)

[caz]

I love all the 'flashbacks' that you do in this story - a great way to find out about Willow & Tara's life together before they broke up. The headboard one was hilarious.

Buffy telling Xander about Willow's dreams was brilliant! I could picture Xander's eyes getting wider as his dirty little mind went into overdrive.

So, Willow is now going to leave hospital and I have to ask - Is Willow gonna need constant nursing and will Tara be the nurse that is doing it?

More soon please!

Caz

[leipreachan11]

Thanks a mil for all the compliments: nice to know this is going down well. And updates aren’t as regular as previously because I’m doing honest-to-goodness work here. Having too many meetings with my boss though, who I think thinks I have a problem because I nervously sweat so much every time I see her.
Also, I’ve added in a couple of bits here and there that weren’t in the original story and it takes me a long time to cover the process of thinking up the ideas, deciding where to put them, writing, proofing, rewriting, proofing, proofing, rewriting and finally posting them. But there is more to come shortly, as soon as I finish this ridiculously long presentation layout.

[The person she loves]

wonderful just wonderful please update soon!

[leipreachan11]

Here we are; another chapter courtesy of busy boredom (that's when you're busy but your work is boring). I was going to split this up but then I decided I was too lazy. And also I don't think it'd be possible from a making sense point of view.


Chapter 18

“Willow, sweetie, I’ve got someone to see you.” Nurse Emy breezed into the room. “Now, Dr. Dempsey told me earlier that I’m not to give you your meds until 6 today, which I’m sure you’ll be happy about because it means you’ll be awake for Tara’s daily visit at 5.”

“Tara has a daily visit? She’s under orders not to!” Willow was simultaneously delighted that Tara ignored her instructions to stay away and worried about her possible failing grades.

Emy quickly remembered the oath she’d sworn to not tell Willow about her girlfriend’s (if she had anything to do with it) visits. “Oh, no, sorry sweetie, I mean Anya. Anya’s daily visits.”

Too happy and hopeful that Tara kept coming even when she was banished and Willow was asleep, she didn’t even bother to remind Nurse Emy that Anya’s daily visits were at half two, something made evident by the fact that Emy had greeted her two minutes ago as she walked out of the room with her mystery novels (Thursdays were Agatha Christie days).

“Anyway honey, the visitor. I was telling you how Mary’s brother’s only after coming out, and him 26. And I told you that he doesn’t really know any gay people so it might be nice if you had a chat with him, tell him how you’re doing, where you go, all that sort of thing. Mary was supposed to introduce him but she’s down with the flu today so I volunteered. So, without further ado, here’s her lovely baby brother, Morgan.” She ushered in a very uncomfortable-looking Morgan, who could be Mary’s twin, if she was a tall, 26-year-old man.

“Morgan, this is Willow. Okay sweetie, now you be kind and fill my honorary nephew in on the ins and outs of being gay.”

Both Willow and Morgan paused a moment, trying to figure out if they were expected to laugh. Realising that this basic definition of the term double entendre was unintentional, they managed to restrain themselves.

“Hi.”

“Hey. Listen before we start… whatever it is we’re supposed to be doing here, I just want to make it clear that this wasn’t my idea. I didn’t ask my sister to set this up, but I think she kinda considers me her project now. It’s getting weird; she’s bought me every gay magazine subscription available, got all the sex-line numbers, membership of every American Gay Alliance… She even came to a gay club with me in L.A., though we weren’t there long before she pulled me out, which I thought was weird ‘cause it was her idea to go in the first place.”

“She didn’t tell you why she pulled you out?” Morgan shook his head. “Apparently she saw one of our nicer doctors here ‘enjoying crotchless trousers’. He’s married, so I’m guessing the need to share this with Emy was pretty immediate. As you may’ve guessed, the pair of them together can be pretty lacking in the discreetness.”

“I was wondering how a total stranger’d know I just came out. I suppose I shoulda just thought ‘Right, she’s Emy’s patient’. Do you actually know what the idea of this little meeting is? Besides me learning the ins and outs of gaydom.” He smiled, showing Hollywood-perfect teeth.

Wow, if I were a straight gal, I’d be wishing I was a gay guy. A thought occurred to Willow. “Hey, the doctor Mary saw in the club, did you see him?”

“No, I didn’t even know about him ‘til you told me. I reckoned she was just freaked or something, and she bought me a multiple DVD set of gay porn the next day outta guilt.”

“Okay. Well his name’s Johnny Fox, or Dr. Foxy as my straighter friends have dubbed him, though even I can tell you he’s a looker. The pair of you’d make a nice couple, if you forgive me sounding like your honorary aunt.”

“How does that sound like Emy?”

Willow sighed. “Well, I’m pretty sure she’s trying to hook up me and my ex again. Not that I’d mind that, quite the opposite, but I don’t want to scare her off with thinking I’m paying my nurses to make suggestive comments or something.”

“She’s Tara, right? Yeah, Emy was filling me in. She really would like you to get back together. ‘A perfect couple’, I’m told. And a very keen visitor.”

“Well, whether all that means is ‘Get well soon’ or is an actual hint of a future, I have no idea. And at this point in time, the idea of asking is far too radical.” She sighed softly.

“You’re the dumpee, huh?”

“Yeah, but I could hardly call myself blameless in the matter. What about you? Any relationships yet?”

“No, I too think that’s a bit radical at the mo. It was actually my now ex-girlfriend of 4 years who managed to smack me to my senses and pull me out of the closet a few weeks ago. I told Mary, and my friends, but it’s not quite an announced fact everywhere yet. Takes a bit of getting used to. Was it Tara who made you realise or did you know all along or what?”

“No, no, I was a firm fan of boystown until a couple of years ago. Had the crushes, had the relationships. Well, relationship singular, but there was some definite second-fella kissing too. The closet-exiting was pretty much out of the blue for everyone, me most of all. But I guess it just takes one person, right? And it did. I never believed in fate until I met her. I had early entry offers from every Ivy League school, a few in Europe, but I stayed with my friends and for a couple of other reasons. So I stayed, I went to UC Sunnydale and I met Tara.”

“Did you know straight away when you met her? I always thought I loved my ex, but in the last couple of weeks when she finally told me I’m gay – how weird does that sound – I realised she was right, it was pretty much her flatmate I was interested in. He’s a he, by the way.”

“No, at first I thought there was this connection ‘cause we were gonna be really good friends, you know? Then I guess we just started hanging out more and more, and at the same time I was kinda growing apart from my high school friends, like you can do in the first couple of months of college. Then one day all the denial that’d been building up in me just imploded and I snapped: I’d fallen in love with a girl. Actually, that’s how I saw it for like 5 minutes – after that, it wasn’t an issue whether she was a girl or not, all I cared about was whether she wanted me too.”

“Did she? Well, I guess that’s a pretty stupid question seeing as she’s now your ex.”

“Yeah, but it took long enough to find out. Months and months. Well, maybe not quite that long, but it sure felt it. A couple of months of all this experimental flirting and sexual frustration before we got going. Worth it in the end, though, no doubt about that. Until…”

“Hey, from what I hear, there’s still something there between you two, so I’d say stick it out. I’d like to meet her though, if she’s anything like her description. And anyway, you liking her for months is hardly as bad as me unknowingly being in love with my girlfriend’s guy flatmate for four years. I was finally stripped of my straight badge when we got footless drunk with him and his girlfriend and played a four-person spin the bottle. Landed on me and him and when I realised my delight I took Susan’s advice and just admitted it. No proper gay kiss yet though, I’m sorry to say. When was your first with Tara?”

Willow smiled. “Well, I’d been staying over in her dorm room a lot, saying I was afraid to walk back alone at night. Sunnydale’s dangerous, you know, a lot of… muggers. Rapists, too.”

“It’s okay, Willow, I know. About the vampires, the demons.”

Willow stared at him. “What makes you think I’d know about that?”

“Mary told me she’s heard you talking about it with your friends. Especially – Buffy? No offence, but what kind of name is that?”

“I dunno, I’ve always been too polite to ask, though I guess I’m not really in a position to, with a name like Willow, and neither is Xander. And as for Rupert, Dawn or Anyanka… Plus I’ve hung with an Angel and a Cordelia, so no-one’s really ever had the right the comment on ‘Buffy’. Tara’s really the only one I know with a vaguely normal name, I must get her to do some gentle inquiring. Come to think of it, I don’t know who the hell is naming people in this town - I’ve known a Percy, a Harmony, a Devon...”

“Yeah, I never liked Morgan, but compared to Angel... Anyway, Mary says the doctors and nurses here are a little more clued-in than the Sunnydale PD. They tend to guess something unusual’s happened when bodies come in skinned, or with bits and pieces missing from their insides. And come on, endless neck ruptures?”

“Yeah, we always wondered if they believed their own explanations. Barbeque forks have been blamed, too. I mean, it’s bad enough if the town’s cops are stupid, but you generally want smart doctors operating on you.”

“Yeah. So, you guys help fight the demons, right? I’ve seen a couple of big guys do that in the less classy parts of L.A. Mary has very good hearing, in case you’re wondering: always close the door tight when you guys are talking about stuff like that if you want it to stay a secret.”

“Thanks for the tip. And yes, that’s kinda Buffy’s job. Besides the Doublemeat Palace, which she considers to be the greater of the two evils. And that’s the main reason I stayed here for college. So I stayed in danger but met Tara. That more than balanced in my favour.”

“Your lack of blamelessness in the break-up, anything to do with demons?”

“In a way. A way that I’m trying to occasionally not think about.”

“Okay, so happier times: the hook-up.”

Willow’s face cleared, the thought of earlier, happier days taking the place of more recent times.

“Ah, the hook-up. So I’d been out of Denial Land, but still firmly in Closet Land, for nearly 2 months, and I’d been gradually upping the ante on research into possibilities of her liking me back. And seeing as you know about the demons, I may as well let you know that magic is real. So me and Tara used to practice witchcraft together and there used to be this great connection buzzing between us afterwards. Plus, we’d usually be holding hands, though half the time we needn’t have been. Basically, one night we did this one spell where we were both sitting on the bed, levitating it. It was really intense, our hands linked, sitting really close together. Then we opened our eyes and looked down, and there was this gorgeous deep red light shining from underneath the bed, and the whole rest of the room had all the colours of a beautiful sunset, blues and yellows and oranges. Okay, I’m not exactly Descripto-Girl, but the whole room was stunning. But then there was us, it was like we were in this bubble of pale light, just a capsule with the two of us inside, the rest of the world left behind. And I just stared at her for the longest time. Believe me, you would too if you were that way inclined. And eventually, it just seemed the logical thing to do to kiss. So I leant in, and she leant in… And we kissed. And we kissed, and we kissed, and we kissed. But you probably don’t need to hear the details, except it was the best thing I’d ever done. She’s the most beautiful kisser, so soft and warm, and she smells of vanilla, which I never liked until I smelt it on her.”

“So, after that, were you like formally together?”

“No, right about then, events began to conspire against us. Just as I was gonna move past kissing territory, Buffy comes a-bangin’ on the door. You have no idea just how awful Buffy’s timing is, always. So there’s Buffy, slamming on the door while Tara’s trying to unlevitate the bed, I’m trying to shoo away our miniature sunset and we’re both trying to regain our general composure. I start this very high-pitched babble when I’m nervous, and Tara stutters, so I dunno what Buffy must have thought was going on when the two of us started chattering away. Luckily, she can also be very blonde at times. So, she dragged me away, extremely unwillingly, to do something for her. So, next day, the second my classes finished I headed over to Tara’s to talk and, well I’ll be honest, to make out. But the second – I mean literally, the second I stepped in the door, the phone rings. Buffy wants us. So over we went to meet the guys, and after the most pointless and boring waste of perfectly good kissing time, I was about to break the hell outta there, when who walks in but my ex-boyfriend. He’d left town with scarcely a goodbye a few months before, and came back suddenly wanting to get back together. So he walks in, and Tara takes off, and I’m left standing there barely knowing my own name. Then, long story short, we talked all night, Tara thought me and him had got back together, then he found out about me and Tara and got pretty crazy, I told him I loved Tara, he left, and I told Tara I loved her. And, not to be tasteless or anything, but I guess we became official girlfriends that night. Or are you only official when you tell other people? Whatever, that came a few days later during a big unrelated fight between me and the guys.”

“Overall, did the coming out go okay? Apparently no-one I told was surprised, in fact all my friends had a bet going to see who guessed right when I’d come out. The pool was up to $456 when I finally did it. Even my parents knew before me. My granny’s being kept in the dark, though.”

“Yeah, I was lucky too. I told my parents a few months ago, my mom doesn’t mind ‘cause she ‘knows’ it’s a college phase and my dad pretty much thinks what my mom thinks because things have always been a lot simpler that way. I was really close to Buffy’s mom, she died about a year ago, and she took it really well, the ‘as long as you’re happy’ approach. It helped that she got to love Tara. In fact, once everyone got over the shock, they were all cool with it. Xander’s been my friend since kindergarten so he’da preferred if I told him before, but got why I didn’t. Giles was drunk when I said it first so didn’t remember it when I announced it properly, then he broke his glasses wiping them so hard. Buffy had a bit of a heads up and her boyfriend had been made an honorary member of the Lesbian Alliance in college so he was cool too. So, all in all, I was lucky.”

“How long were you together?”

“Nearly two years. And as I look back on them, they just flew by. And we’ve been broken up a couple of months, and I know it sounds corny, but it seems like a lifetime. All I can say, Morgan, is that if you ever find anyone that you care about as much I do Tara, never let him go. One screw-up and that could be it.”

“So that’s what I should be aiming for. Get me a Tara. I’d love to meet her, Emy said she usually comes in around now. Mind if I stay?”

“Of course, maybe she can help come up with ways to hook you and Dr. Foxy up. And anyway, once you go, you should keep in contact, I’d love to know how my new protégé’s doing. Well, speak of the devil.”

Tara walked in, a little hesitant as she saw this stranger laughing with Willow. She then cringed when she remembered that this was supposed to be a secret visit. There was no way she was going to be banned entirely from seeing Willow. Why wasn’t she drugged?

“Tara, hey! Remember how I was telling you that Nurse Emy asked me to talk to Mary’s brother? This is him – Morgan meet my good friend Tara-” she snuck a glance at Tara looking for a reaction to this description, but she seemed a little preoccupied “-and Tara, this is Morgan, Mary’s baby brother.”

“Lovely to meet you, Tara, I’ve heard a lot about you.”

From who? Tara wouldn’t be surprised if Emy and Mary had filled him in on everything they knew about her – after all, they’d told Willow a lot about him – but from the blush on her face, it looked like a little info, hopefully good, had been contributed by her ‘good friend’.

“You too. Wow, you’re the spit of Mary. In a tall, younger, male way.”

“Yeah, I get that a lot.”

“So Tara, Morgan here’s a young, tall, gay, single man. Reckon there’s anyone, a doctor for example, we could set him up with?”

“You mean Dr. Foxy?” Tara paused for a moment. “Buffy’d go crazy, but once we point out that she’s most certainly neither tall, gay, nor a man, and so doesn’t have much of a chance, she might accept it. So, not to sound too much like Emy, you should try and check him out, Morgan. I don’t approve of cheating though, but then these are kind of extenuating circumstances. So look for a ring, and if that finger’s empty, you have my blessing. I’ll point him out.”

[Missocki]

Oh Yay! I love this story to pieces and pieces!

I agree with Morgan- (or was it Malcolm? I got confused with that)
We all need to find a Tara, well, not Tara specifically but you know what I mean.

Can't wait for you next timely update!

[leipreachan11]

Ooh, thanks for that. This is what happens when you write your fic while feeling guilty for not working to such an extent that your co-worker Malcolm has to pick up the slack.

Gosh darn it, missing italics also added.

[WillowRulez]

[blockquote]"Especially – Buffy? No offence, but what kind of name is that?”

“I dunno, I’ve always been too polite to ask, though I guess I’m not really in a position to, with a name like Willow, and neither is Xander. And as for Rupert, Dawn or Anyanka… Plus I’ve hung with an Angel and a Cordelia, so no-one’s really ever had the right the comment on ‘Buffy’. Tara’s really the only one I know with a vaguely normal name, I must get her to do some gentle inquiring. Come to think of it, I don’t know who the hell is naming people in this town - I’ve known a Percy, a Harmony, a Devon...”
Priceless!!![/blockquote]
Great update. I really love this story!

[Guppy]

Awesome update! I love the whole dialogue between Willow and Morgan. And yea for hearing Tara and Willow's beginnings. Always a good thing to hear about!

[leipreachan11]

It's been a while since I did the pre-tale info, so:

Disclaimer: I don't own a few the characters. They belong to JW, ME, WB and various other acronyms.

Summary: There was an incident... or was there? Yes, there was, in the Magic Box. Willow got hurt quite badly so she's still in the hospital. She gets visited a lot.

Timeline: Willow and Tara had been broken up and Willow had been off magic for about a month before this happened. Willow's been in hospital for about 3 weeks.

Note: It would probably make more sense if you read the previous chapters before this to get a proper idea of what's happened.


Chapter 19

The 'three happy gays', a collective nickname decided upon by Nurses Emy and Jenny, who were both under Mary's orders to earwig as much as possible, chatted away for almost an hour before Emy reluctantly came in to tell them it was time to drug Willow. Having found out he was a fellow art fan, Tara had offered to take Morgan to her favourite local gallery after their visit, so they said their goodbyes, and headed out, before Willow called Tara back.

“Hey – thank you so much for still coming even when you were banned. It means a lot, though I won’t be happy if your grades go to hell because of it.”

“Don’t be silly sweetie, I could hardly desert you for a week. And don’t worry, I brought my books with me. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

With that she smiled and squeezed Willow’s hand, before walking out the door, leaving behind a drugged-up but ecstatic patient falling asleep, ready for some wonderful dreams.


A gallery visit later, Tara and Morgan sat in the Espresso Pump, chatting away. Tara was delighted that she’d found a friend in Morgan, and one who appreciated the same styles of art as she did. She’d brought Willow to galleries and shown her her art books, but she no more enjoyed just staring at pictures for hours than Tara did hacking into various governmental systems, despite having an eager teacher. All in all, the idea of having a gallery-buddy was very appealing.

“So, did you really not know you were gay until last month?”

“Well, thinking about it, I can basically describe it as my having been in the deepest depths of Denial Land. Like, when I’d be sitting in a restaurant and some good-looking guy walked by, I used to think ‘wow, that guy is hot’. But when I caught myself thinking that, I’d basically try to convince myself that I was a New Age man or something, one who could appreciate other guys without being gay. People underestimate the power of denial. How ‘bout you? Was it Willow who turned you or did you already know?”

“I guess I knew, but not for long. I suppose I accepted it around the end of high school. Willow was my first real crush though. I don’t really believe in love at first sight because that’s more or less based on looks, but it was certainly lust at first sight, very quickly followed by love. I got to know her first through magic, she’d come to my room to do spells and stuff. The more we hung out, the more I fell for her. And right from the start she was always really friendly, and I’d accepted that we’d never be anything ‘cause, well, look at her. But then it was weird. One day she just suddenly changed. We’d arranged to go to a film and she was all cool about it, it was her idea actually, but then when we went to it she was really jumpy. She does this really high-pitched, lightening-speed babble thing when she’s nervous, and she did it all through the night. When I asked her if she wanted popcorn or sweets she spent over five totally uninterruptible minutes going through the various ingredients in both, then she told me about the process of making popcorn versus sweets, the calories in each, which would match her dinner and much, much more. I then made the fatal error of asking if she wanted a drink. I learnt all about the ingredients of Coke and Diet Coke, then the human digestive system, how the bladder works... I honestly thought she was on speed.”

Morgan laughed. “What did she go with in the end?”

“Ice-cream. Thank the Lord that the film started just as she was about to explain why various ice-creams freeze at different temperatures. Anyway, months later, I discovered that this hyperness was because she’d just realised she had a crush on me. But she calmed down after the film, though I went half-way across Sunnydale to get back to my dorm without passing this place: I’m pretty sure she’d still be bouncing off the ceiling if she’d added coffee to her mind in that state. After that night she started some light flirting with me, though I didn’t know that’s what it was until she told me when we’d got together. She took her jumper off a lot, always very slowly, but whether that was for my benefit or not I had no idea. Not the highest self-confidence over here, though I did find it strange that she’d take it off and only have a T-shirt or string top on, then she’d have goosebumps all over. When she thought I wasn’t looking she’d be rubbing her arms like she was freezing, so I bought an extra heater so she wouldn’t be cold when she was sleeveless. But she liked it when the heater was up to the max because she’s naturally a cold creature. Then I was hot, because I’m a hot creature but I didn’t like skimpy tops showing my arms, so I sweated a lot, and was constantly drinking water... and I had to be polite every time I took water out of the fridge so I’d offer her some, and she was being polite and accepting it, but she wasn’t sweating and apparently has a very small bladder, so she was constantly running to the loo... Jesus, we were disasters.”

Morgan was in fits laughing at this stage, and Tara joined in at the thought of her crazy early relationship with Willow.

“It’s just ridiculous, we were such morons. She was half stripping for my benefit, I used to pretend to be asleep before wrapping myself around her in bed, we messed up a couple of otherwise perfect spells by pretending we thought we had to hold hands when we both knew that was exactly the reason the spells weren’t working, and still neither of us took the plunge and did anything about what had to be pretty darn obvious crushes. And her with a practically four-figure IQ.”

“So, what finally copped you on to do something about it?”

“I dunno, it’s not like I had an epiphany or anything. I’d just been waiting for her to make some move because Lord knows I wasn’t going to. And, naturally, turns out that’s exactly what she was waiting for. So I guess it was fitting that neither of us really initiated our first kiss, it was just natural.”

“So how did it happen?” Morgan was interested to hear Tara’s side of the story.

“Well, Willow had seen this levitating spell in a book. I’d been trying to come up with various spells that’d involve us sitting close together, and this one did just that. Plus it promised some very pretty colours. So we sat as close as physically possible when you both have your legs crossed, and we were holding hands. Then the bed lifted about 2 feet off the ground and we opened our eyes and we were surrounded by all these beautiful colours. This deep, crimson red looked like it was radiating from underneath the bed, and from the shades around us we could’ve been looking at an incredible sunset. These soft oranges and pale yellows were streaked through the air, like they were taking over from the fading blue. But then right in the middle of it, we were in this white cocoon. Willow looked... unbelievable. The white was reflected on her hair and she may as well have had angel’s wings, she looked so perfect. So there she was, glowing and beautiful and staring at me with such wide eyes, which I’ve since discovered are her ‘super-horny’ eyes. And I just thought, what if she’s walking home tomorrow and gets attacked by a vampire? Or if I do? How could I die never having at least tried to kiss her? So I took a really deep breath and leaned in as she did too and we kissed. And kept on kissing until, just as I’d plucked up the courage to move my hand south from her hair, her friend Buffy starts hammering on the door. So we restored everything to how it should have been and wiped the other’s lipstick off our faces and opened the door and a babble and stutter-fest began. Willow looked like she was on speed again, how Buffy didn’t realise something was up I have no idea, but she can be pretty clueless sometimes. She pulled Willow away and I was left sitting on my bed in an utter panic in case Willow never wanted to see me again.”

“Presumably she did.”

“Yes, incredibly, she came over the next day with her horny eyes on. But then the bad luck started. First, literally the very moment her feet hit my bedroom floor, and just as my arms had reached her, Buffy called for an update meeting. A meeting to update us that nothing was happening in the demon world, and Willow and me were twitching like bunnies wanting to get out of there. There’s me sitting happier than I’ve ever been but pretending to be interested in what little Buffy had to say, and trying to get Willow out of my mind when Anya starts talking about sex. And then, just when I’d thought of a diversion that could get us out, comes the worst surprise of my life - in walks Willow’s ex. They didn’t part on the best of terms, and Willow had been in pieces when he left. I always knew in the back of my mind that if he came back, they’d get back together, though I did think it was pretty presumptuous of him to arrive after months without contact and expect her to be waiting for him when she could have any guy she wants. But it just hit me like a tonne of bricks, like he’d come in and punched me in the gut.”

Tara sighed softly, and seemed to Morgan as if she was going back to how devastated she was that day. “But hey, it all worked out, right?”

"Yeah, eventually. I was sure they were back together, so I was just sitting in my room crying when Willow came over, I presumed to say ‘Hey, let’s be friends’. Which was better than nothing, but still awful. Then she kind of told me she loved me, then she did properly and that was the biggest, best surprise of my life, like a really nice punch in the gut. I guess the equivalent of a punch if you’re into S&M or something. Since then, it got better every day. Until...”

Morgan didn’t want to lose her again to her memories of whatever it was that Willow had done, and suspected that the subject of their break-up was every bit as upsetting for her as it was for Willow, so he tried to shift the subject. “So, I have a Foxy Doctor to woo, huh? I might need some tips on that.”

Tara was more than happy to move on from brighter topics than her stormy ending with Willow. “Yeah, right, we should get on that. He’s not Will’s doctor so it might be tricky, but Buffy can be very sneaky when she tries. And Willow’s probably gonna be out in a couple of days, so we really are on the clock. But someone around here deserves a love-life, so don’t worry, Morgan, we’re all on the case.”

[WillowRulez]

"When I asked her if she wanted popcorn or sweets she spent over five totally uninterruptible minutes going through the various ingredients in both, then she told me about the process of making popcorn versus sweets, the calories in each, which would match her dinner and much, much more. I then made the fatal error of asking if she wanted a drink. I learnt all about the ingredients of Coke and Diet Coke, then the human digestive system, how the bladder works... I honestly thought she was on speed.”
Priceless! Aren't these two the cutest?
Oh, everyone deserves a love-life? Your words in your own ears, Tara hehe.

[beanie]

GOD SO CUTE. IT'S DISGUSTING. Oh, speed. Nervous-Willow on speed with mochas? I don't think we'd be able to see her long enough to write a story about her. The "flirting" thing was HIGHlarious. HIGHHIGHlarious. I'm rolling on my mental floor right now grabbing my mental sides. Oh look, an elephant.

And now after that non-sequitur, how are you? You're fackin fabulicious that's what you are. Your story: yum. In my tum. I really can't wait to see how the gang plans on wooing Foxy Doctor. They're all so crazy and awkward, it'll be great!!!!

[Insert plea for update here]

-beanie

[Guppy]

Super-horny eyes! five minutes about nutritional value of snacks! LOL! Awesome awesome update!

[Willowtree252]

Tara needs to listen to herself things can still happen and the world could come to an end tomorrow she need to get back to those horny eyes fast. I love this story more please.

[tarebear]

fabulous updates... the other kittens are right, tara should listen to her own words.

...someone around here deserves a love-life...

if someone here deserves a lovelife, that would be them... they have gone through so much and it seems that they still love each other, they should give each other another chance soon or (by her own words):

...what if she’s walking home tomorrow and gets attacked by a vampire? Or if I do?

can't wait for find out what they have cooking for dr foxy and morgan... soon i hope!

[Candleshoe]

I go away for a few days and look what I miss - two wonderful updates!

My favourite line was actually from chapter 18:

my dad pretty much thinks what my mom thinks because things have always been a lot simpler that way

it reminds me of my dad!