I will post replies to feedback a little later. In the meantime, the much anticipated update.
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When we arrived back at my apartment, the first thing I did was get Joshua ready for bed. I usually tried to have him tucked in between eight and nine so that I was certain he was getting a full night’s rest, and also so that I could have some quiet time in the evening for myself as well.
At the time it was only a little bit after seven, so it was too early to actually put him down, but at least having him in his pajamas already would make it easier once the time came.
While I had been washing J.J. up and getting him ready to retire, Tara had waited patiently in the living room, flipping through one of my Women’s World magazines. I had groaned internally when I had seen her pick one of the copies up, thinking she must think me so sadly domestic at only 23 years old. Honestly, I had only started reading them because my mother had purchased a subscription for me. I don’t even remember her reasoning except I think she saw a picture of Ellen DeGeneres on the cover once and thought that they had somehow become a lesbian magazine or something to that effect.
At one point Tara had called out from her seat asking if I needed any help. Of course I politely declined her offer, but let her know she could watch TV or whatever she liked until I had finished up with my son.
When Joshua and I had finally re-emerged from his room, with him looking as dashing as ever in his Captain America PJ’s, we found Tara doing the dishes from that morning, up to her elbows in soapsuds.
“Sorry,” she had said, looking up to me and blushing deeply, “I just…wanted to feel like I was doing something useful.”
“That’s okay,” I chuckled. “Can I get you anything else to clean?” I asked jokingly.
“No, I think I’m good here,” she replied faux-serious, flashing me a flirtatious smile. I felt my insides happily shiver a little at the sight.
I sat Josh down in his high chair and scooted past Tara to get to the fridge. “I was going to share a pudding cup with Joshua,” I announced, “did you want one?”
“Sure,” she replied amiably, pulling the plug from the bottom of the now dish-free sink and rinsing her hands off under the faucet. “What flavor?”
“Oh, it’s just vanilla,” I said, pulling a couple of the small foil-topped containers from out of their cardboard packaging. “We don’t get too crazy around here with those new fangled chocolate concoctions,” I teased. Truth was I just didn’t want J.J. to get too hyper before bedtime. “Can I get you anything to drink?” I offered.
“I think I saw a couple of beers in the fridge last night,” she commented, leaning against the countertop, “I’ll have one if you will.”
“That sounds great,” I exhaled, but then the disastrous flavor potential crossed my mind, “but… won’t that taste kind of gross… beer with pudding?”
She shrugged, “only one way to find out.”
I smiled, pulling the bottles out of the fridge and handing them to her, “Here, you crack these open while I put some juice in J.J.’s Sip-E-Cup.”
Tara used the lip of her shirt to protect her hands from the rough edges on the bottle caps as she twisted them off. She crossed over to my little dining room table and sat down across from J.J.
“So, Josh, let me ask you something,” she said playfully. “Would you say that you have the prettiest mommy in town?”
I did my best to keep my attention on filling my son’s Sip-E-Cup and not give in to the urge to look up at them. I could feel Tara’s eyes on me, her smile glowing at me, waiting for my reaction. I heard Joshua giggle and clap his hands happily in answer, causing me to blush.
“I’d have to say that I agree with you,” Tara approved, I blushed even more. I snapped the top of the cup into place and joined them at the table, setting the pudding cups down with a couple of spoons and placing J.J.’s juice cup on his highchair tray.
“You don’t have to do that, you know,” I stated, pulling the foil cover off of the pudding and setting it aside.
“Don’t have to do what?” Tara asked, doing the same with hers.
“Flatter me,” I explained.
“Maybe I feel you’re worth flattering,” she countered with a charming smile.
I laughed a little self-consciously and offered Joshua a small spoonful of pudding. “So,” I said, taking a bite for myself, “Are you going to school at all?”
“No,” she replied, “I take on the job training courses and stuff. I just… haven’t yet settled into the idea that this is what I am going to do for the rest of my life.”
“But you’re so good at it,” I said, continuing to share my pudding cup with Josh. He bounced happily in his seat, a true pudding fan.
“I know,” she shrugged, “and I love what I do. Especially now, working with the kids. But… I don’t know… I guess, I just don’t see myself doing this ten years from now.”
“What do you see yourself doing?” I asked, taking a sip of beer. I winced, not the best flavor combination in the world. I decided to save the rest of it until after I was through with the pudding.
Tara let out a breath that was half laugh and half sigh. “I don’t know,” she admitted.
“Painting?” I offered, referring back to her statement at dinner.
“Maybe,” she said again, as she had before. “I just… haven’t been that inspired lately. Most of my watercolors lately have been…all wet.” She laughed at her own pun.
“Ah…ah…ah…!” Joshua exclaimed, slapping his hand on his tray three times. I realized that I had been holding the spoon with pudding on it just out of his reach as I had listened to Tara.
“Sorry, sweetie,” I apologized, finally bringing the spoon to his mouth; he sucked on it happily.
“He likes his pudding,” Tara commented, smiling.
“He does,” I affirmed, “I’ve created a monster.” I looked down to see the cup empty. “Oh, all gone,” I announced, “All gone, little man, you ate it all up.”
“Ah!” he said again with another slap to his tray.
“Nope, that’s all you get,” I said, helping him to hold his two-handled Sip-E-Cup. “Here, have some juice and then bedtime.” He brought the cup to his mouth with shaky hands and began to suck on it greedily. I sighed as I looked at him, my precious son, my baby. I ran my fingers gently through his hair as he drank. “Do you really think he has CP?” I asked sadly.
Tara took a drink of her beer, also grimacing at the awkward taste of pudding and fermented grain. “Might as well get him tested and prove me wrong,” she said. “I’d much rather be proven wrong,” she added softly after moment. I nodded.
Joshua started to cough a little from drinking too fast. I quickly and delicately pulled the cup’s spout from his mouth and rubbed his back, encouraging him to take a deeper breath. I took the cup from him and set it on the table once he had calmed down and stood, lifting him from his chair and into my arms. “Okay, bedtime, J.J.” He whined a little bit, but nothing that could qualify as an actual protest. “You can follow me to his room if you like,” I offered to Tara.
She smiled and stood, following us down the hall to Josh’s bedroom. I laid him on his bed, tucking him in and pulling up the side rail as I always did, and because he was still awake I turned on the electric mobile that I had attached to his headboard. It began playing Brahms’ lullaby on a soft tinkling music box while lit up figures of sleeping animals began to turn in a clockwise circle above his head. I leaned down and kissed him softly on the forehead whispering, “Goodnight, Joshua, I love you” in his ear. I pulled back and he looked up at me with the same wide expressive eyes he had the day he was born. I felt my heart squeeze inside my chest with emotion.
Letting out a sigh of contentment I stepped away from his bed and looked up to see Tara standing next to me with Clifford, J.J.’s favorite plush toy, in her hands. “I thought he might like someone to keep him company,” she said, indicating to the stuffed animal.
“He’d love that,” I smiled. I moved aside far enough for her to squeeze by in front of the bed.
“Here you are, handsome,” she said, placing the red dog in his arms, “sweet dreams tonight.” She touched her hand to his forehead and then stood up, looking back to me. I grinned at her and she followed me back into the kitchen so we could both retrieve our drinks.
We sipped on our beers and talked for a little while about menial things; the weather, our jobs, hobbies, etc. I found out that she liked to play tennis sometimes, which excited me a little because I did too, but couldn’t seem to find a partner to play with. There were tennis courts in the apartment complex and she and I agreed to meet the next day to play a few rounds. We continued to flirt throughout our conversation and I became increasingly aware of my attraction to her and the desire for her that was creeping into my veins.
After a while we started talking about Joshua again. It seemed like it was impossible for me not to bring him into every conversation at some point. After all, how can you easily leave out your entire world? I related cute stories about him from after he had just been born. Somehow we came, not surprisingly, to the subject of baby pictures. I eagerly announced that I had several albums of photos in my bedroom, and she followed after me as I went to retrieve them.
I stood in front of my bookcase, looking for a particular album that had most of my son’s newborn pictures in it, when I felt Tara’s arms wrapping gently around my waist from behind, her body pressed up against my back and her lips descending on my neck just below my ear.
“Let me know if this is too soon,” she whispered against my lobe.
With any other woman, this would have been too soon. With any other woman, this would have been a total breech in proper dating etiquette. But with
this woman, it almost didn’t seem soon enough. Something about her, something intangible, was pulling me toward her, the inevitability of it all inescapable, not that I even thought of wanting to escape.
I tilted my head to the side, exposing more of my neck for her to taste. After a moment more, I spun in her embrace, my arms coming up to curl around her neck, resting on her shoulders, my lips seeking to capture her own. We kissed deeply and with opened mouths, skipping all pretenses, our tongues quickly finding each other to feel and explore. Her tongue felt soft and textured against my own and tasted of sweet pudding and bitter beer, the combination now much more delectable then it had been before.
Her arms, deceptively strong, tightened around me, her hands pressed up against my back, pulling me to her.
I was hyperaware of everything going on around me, against me and inside me. The feeling of her breasts pressed firmly against my own, her thigh inching its way between my legs, the hot breath from her nostrils against my cheek as her heavy, aroused breathing mirrored my own. My hands came up tangling in her long, blonde hair, cupping the base of her skull in my palms as I learned her flavor.
I felt her hands slide down my back to the edge of my blouse. She slipped her fingertips under the material, coming into contact with the skin of my low back. I let a moan of pleasure escape into her mouth through the kisses we continued to share. Her hands caressed upwards, dragging my shirt with them, until she had lifted it, along with my chemise, up and over my head disturbing our kisses for a moment, as I pulled back to let the garments fall to the floor.
Now, with my upper body clad only in my black lace bra, I leaned forward again, recapturing her lips in a heated exchange as my own hands drifted to the base of her red-colored polo shirt, tugging it up her body and pulling my head back once again to free it up over her head and toss it aside.
Her strong hands grasped my waist and drew me to her, our semi-nude upper bodies pressed together, as she dipped her head to my collarbone and began to suck gently. I clung to her frame, giving myself to her, once again letting her take the lead.
Nimble fingers found the clasps of my bra, and quickly had it undone. I felt the thin straps fall down my front and free of my body. As soon as it was gone, Tara’s mouth descended on my right breast, licking and sucking. I arched into her, unable to control my body’s response; I let out a breathy sigh of excitement as I felt the skin of both my nipples grow taut with desire. My hands moved, almost magnetically, to her head holding it in place. I felt her teeth delicately graze the engorged tip of my right nipple and I let out a small cry of pleasant surprise at the sensation.
Fearing she might misunderstand me, Tara pulled away for a moment, looking into my eyes, “did I hurt you?” She asked.
“No,” I replied breathlessly.
“Do you want me to stop?”
“No,” I answered again.
“Would you tell me if you did?”
“Yes,” I admitted. She gave an almost imperceptible nod and went back to her task, this time sucking my entire left breast almost fully into her mouth. My head lolled back on my neck, my jaw dropping open in pleasure as my fingers gripped her hair tightly. I was more aroused than I had ever been in my entire life.
After she had finished thoroughly satisfying my breasts, she stood up and pressed her lips once again to mine. My hands fell from her hair to the fastening of her own bra, undoing it quickly and practically yanking it off. She chuckled into my mouth at my actions and pressed her upper body to mine. The soft skin of her breasts, so much fuller than my own, tantalizingly caressed my still hardened nipples as they rubbed against each other almost roughly.
Her hands still gripped me by my waist and I could feel them slide to the middle of my low back, just above my ass, her fingers finding the zipper to my modest length black skirt and pulling it down, the metal teeth undoing themselves with their familiar sound. Wanting to be fair in keeping things even, I reached between our bodies and undid the button of her khakis, unzipping them as well.
Much as she had done with my blouse, she slipped her fingers under the edge of my skirt, and pantyhose as well, bending at the knees and sliding them down my body. Placing my hands on her shoulders for leverage, I prepared to step out of the offending articles of clothing, when I heard Tara chuckling, that rich and throaty sound, from below me. I looked down at her quizzically, and feared she found something about my body to be humorous.
She smiled up at me from her position on bended knee. “Shoes,” she explained with a wry grin. I felt my face flush with mild embarrassment. How strange that I had never taken them off when we got home. She carefully removed them from my feet, before helping me step out of my skirt and hose, leaving them as a puddle on the floor.
Tara stood back up, kicking off her tennis shoes and shucking her pants off in the process. Only a pair of panties each kept us from viewing each other fully.
She placed her hands on either side of my head, as she had the first time we had kissed, and once again drew me to her. Our lips met again passionately. It seemed as though no matter how we tried, we could not get enough of kissing each other.
I felt her begin to move backwards to the bed, sitting when her calves struck the edge. I followed her, straddling her thighs and sitting on her lap, my hands gripping her shoulders, steadying myself. Tara wrapped one strong arm around my waist, her other hand coming up between us to massage my left breast. I moaned again into her mouth. It was as if she had knowledge of my body that was more thorough than my own.
She slid her hand from off of my breast, around to firmly hold my upper back, surprising me again with her hidden strength as she pushed backwards up and off of the floor with the balls of her feet, toward the head of the bed, somehow twisting our tangled bodies in mid-air so that we landed, I on my back, her resting gently on top of me, her thigh coming up and pressing between my own into the heated wetness there. I gasped, my head pressing back against the sheets, my body arching forward and down, hips pushing against her firm quadriceps, seeking further purchase on their own accord.
As our bodies began to rock against each other, sending bolts of white-hot electricity upwards through my veins, Tara brought her left arm that was resting under my upper back, to cradle my head, my neck resting in the crook of her elbow. Her other arm she pulled free of its confinement beneath my low back and raised her right hand to tenderly cup my face as our lips and tongues continued to dance. I curled both of my arms underneath her own so that my hands now rested against her back, gripping at the musculature of her shoulders, holding on to her tightly as her lower body made slow, deliberate and sensual movements against my excited center.
Tara moved slightly off the midline of my body so that she now rested against my right side, using her left thigh to spread my right leg open to the cool air of my bedroom. My hips flexed, missing the pressure of her thigh, I whimpered against her lips, communicating my sadness at the loss. I did not have to wait long for her remedy as I felt her right hand slide down the skin of my neck, down my body, caressing my breasts, lower still across my abdomen, now tensing with anticipation of what I knew was to come. I clutched more tightly at her shoulders, a shuddering breath escaping my mouth, a semi-audible cry of pleasure let loose from my lips as she slid her long and agile fingers under the elastic of my panties and through the molten heat of my drenched center. Tara played her fingers over my sensitive flesh, her digits growing damp and sticky with the evidence of my arousal. She sought out and quickly found the swollen proof of my lust, tickling the tips of her fingers over it, causing my body to arch suddenly against hers in surprise at the sensation which had been until that moment long absent from my life. Long absent, but never forgotten, and still wonderfully familiar.
I grew suddenly impatient with the pace Tara had set up until then. I reached down with my left hand and hooked my thumb into the band of my underwear trying to pull it down off of my hips almost frantically. Seeing my urgency, Tara quickly moved to help, her right hand temporarily leaving its home between my legs to tug my panties free of my right hip. I assisted in lifting my ass from off the bed as we both pushed the material down to my knees where I was able to pull my left leg up and slide the offending cloth the rest of the way off. The other half stayed looped around my upper right leg, my thigh still pinned to the mattress by Tara’s own. I was content to let it stay there; satisfied that it was at least out of the way.
Tara wasted no time returning her fingers to their mission. My arm returned to its previous position, my fingers clutching against her shoulder and back. My breath arrested, frozen in my chest and throat, as I felt her push two fingers up inside of me, filling me completely. I pulled my mouth from her lips, resting my left cheek against her face, my breath coming hot and fast now, mixed with soft whimpers of delight, played across the contours of her ear, encouraging her actions.
I let out a loud and sudden grunt as the tips of her fingers inside me found the hidden ridge deep within the confines of my valley. Pleased with her discovery, and my reaction to it, she skillfully began to lightly rub and massage the secret within my core.
I clung to her urgently, my cries and whimpers growing in intensity as I felt the gathering storm beginning to manifest within me. My hips bucked wildly at her attentions until suddenly my entire body arched into a rigid pose, slamming hard against hers, my jaw locked open in a silent cry as my release washed through me, more intense than any sensation I had ever felt in my life. Wave after wave crashed against my soul, my body shuddering with each new crest, until finally I lay exhausted, spent and limp in her arms, breathing deep and labored breaths as I slowly recovered. I felt Tara carefully withdraw her fingers from within me, my hips pressing down involuntarily, not wanting to let go of her. She wiped her fingers against the sheets before bringing her hand up and lovingly brushing my hair away from my eyes as she gazed down at me, her eyes filled with love and peace.
“Are you okay?” she asked softly. Too weak to speak, I merely nodded. “You needed that,” she accurately observed. Again I could only nod in affirmation. Taking pity on my exhaustion, Tara rolled onto her back, and pulled me with her so that I curled against her side, my head pillowed on her breast. My breathing slowed and my eyes fluttered shut. I felt her place a tender kiss on my forehead as she soothingly ran her hand up and down my back, caressing me into a deep and dreamless sleep.
*****
TBC...
"Promise me you'll never be linear." "On my trout."
Edited by: DarkWiccan at: 4/19/04 10:53 am