Okay, I promised the Tara conversation and then realized that I still had to spend a little time with Buffy and Dawn. But I am a woman of my word so here is a double post, to keep the integrity of the story and my promise to you all. Again, thanks for your feedback. It does become kind of addicting. **********************
"They promised to call us after they talked to her. So that should be any minute now. If she is willing, we are going to meet with her tomorrow. She has the day off and Dawn does not have any Friday classes so we are going to meet around lunch.."
"Great and you will call me. Maybe you can just keep the cell phone all day. Then I could talk to her and be a part of the conversation. If she remembers anyone, it would me. After all, I was her best non-orgasm giving friend. We were in the psycho pep squad together. She is still my made of honor even though the wedding never went through. I have rights. I should have been told. I would have closed the shop. You know how important she was, I mean IS to me. She was the only one who would sit and listen to me talk about money and how angry I was at that person who's name I don't like to say but am still going out to patrol with in an hour. She was the one who listened to my dreams of starting chain stores. She even..."
Anya talked on but Buffy held the phone away from her ear and rolled her eyes at her sister. She had known that she was going to get an earful but she had expected Anya to be upset over the closing of the self-defense studio for at least week. Anya was the only one who could inform her students and she knew that would be a hassle. But the closed studio and the loss of income ws not the issue that had upset her business partner; Anya was upset to be left out of the loop. Buffy put her ear back to the phone in time to hear Anay say, "... After all, I didn't erase her memory two times. I didn't turn my back on our relationship so that I can do black magic. Even when I was reconsidering my career as a vengeance demon, I kept talking to Tara. Why does Willow get involved but..."
"Enough!" Buffy sharply spoke into the phone. She knew that once Anya started on her a Willow tirade, she might never stop. "We have to tell Willow. She has been miserable for the last five years. Sure, we have missed Tara terribly but we have gone on with our lives. You have the shop and Dave, Dawn has school and the hopes of possibly someday having a normal relationship, and I have the school and .... um... the school which has been really successful. Willow has been buried in work for the last five years. The only thing Willow has done since Tara disappeared has been to subsist. For the last five years, she has been like how I was when you guys first resurrected me. There has been no joy for her. She sticks around out of responsibility but she is only half there. Maybe now she has another chance. You know that she deserves it."
The other line was silent for a moment, Buffy could only hear Anya breath. "Your right. It would be good to have them back together. It would be good to have us all back together. I don't just miss Tara, I miss Willow, even when she is in the same room. So, what's the plan?"
"As I said before, Julie and Betsy should be telling her about us right now. If she takes it okay, we are going to meet Julie and Tara for lunch tomorrow. Betsy, the doctor has to work. We gave them some pictures to show Tara. We had different ones of all of us. Julie wanted Tara to have some time to adjust to the news. She said that it was possible but not likely that Tara will remember things right away."
"I should be there to test for witchcraft. Maybe she is under a spell and that is why she can not remember anything." Anya's mind was turning as she was thinking of the different ways that Tara could have lost her memory. She had felt guilty for having avoided everyone after the wedding. Maybe if she had spent more time with Tara, she would have been able to protect her better. "Buffy, I could still fly out there."
"Anya, I appreciate the offer but can we just wait to see what happens tonight and tomorrow. I promise to call you and let you know how things go. We are going to have our hands full with Willow. I just don't know how she will react when we give her the news.:
"Alright, I will wait but I am not happy about it. Do you want me to tell Xander what is happening? He should be here in about an hour so we can go patrol."
"Yes please. I was going to call him after I talked to you but if you can tell that would make things easier. Tell him he can call with any questions that he might have. Thanks for taking care of everything at home."
"No problem. I am glad I can help. Buffy, good luck. Give Dawn a hug for me and when you see Tara, please tell her that I love and miss her very much. I need to calm down. I guess I will go count my money." And with that, the ex-demon hung up the phone.
Buffy turned from the phone and faced her sister. "That was probably the most normal conversation I have ever had with Anya. She didn't mention evisceration once. I believe our ex-demon is really getting good with this human stuff."
"Well, it's only been almost nine years. We probably should have a big party for her when she celebrates her 10th year." Dawn's smile began to fade as she thought of less pleasant anniversaries that they were during the late winter and spring. "Buffy, it has been five years since we saw Tara. Do you think we will be blessed enough to get our friend back?"
Buffy sat down on the bed next to her little sister and began to play with her hair. "I do believe we will get her. This time, we are not resurrecting the dead. This time, we are not trying to alter the forces of nature or fate. This time, we are going to see a friend who has been lost. People get lost."
"But what if she still doesn't remember us. What if we bring back only the bad memories. The memories of her being attacked by Glory and hurt by Willow. What if she looks at us and says, I don't want to know who you people are?"
"I have considered all those possibilities and you know what, little sister? If she remembers, then that means she will remember us. We helped her face her fears before and we can do it again. And if she doesn't remember us, that does not mean she has changed. You heard all the things Julie and Betsy said. Terri is still basically Tara. We did not love her for her memories. We loved her because she was family to us. She took care and loved us. And we took care and loved her. Whether she needs us or not, she needs to know us. Okay?"
"Yes but you realize you are going to have to give that speech to me about twenty times tomorrow."
"Well, remember it because you may have to give it to me also."
"That's a deal."
*******************
From the living room, Besty heard the shower shut off. She stood up and stretched, trying to prepare herself for the conversation that was moments away. She walked over the the kitchen and watched her girlfriend standing at the stove staring at the tea pot. The room was so quiet but so loud with her girlfriends thoughts. Betsy was carefully spoke with love and affection. "Julie, we have to put aside whatever is happening with us right now and get ready to tell her the truth. You do the talking and I'll work on my silent but supportive girlfriend persona. It's a new thing that I am trying, I am hoping it will be more effective than my pushy, controlling side."
Looking at the one person who she needed at that moment, Julie immediately responded by crossing the room and wrapped her arms around her girlfriend. She wondered how she had gotten so lucky to find the perfect woman for her and whispered "You are always what I need. Thank you."
"That's why we have each other. We will always have each other." Betsy hugged her lover tighter and rocked back and forth, finding comfort and peace in the embrace.
Tara stood uncomfortably in the doorway. Her roommates intimacy never bothered her, at times it made her long for that same type of intimacy. Tonight as she stood at the entrance of the kitchen, her heart ached over the scene. She was not sure where such emotions came from. Maybe she be sad because she knew that they were going to ask her to move out. She felt for her friends because she knew that they would feel bad about asking her to go. This must be so hard on them. She decided to cough softly so that they would know she was in the room. "I don't want to bother you two. We can talk tomorrow."
The two women looked up at there friend and then without breaking their embrace, they shuffled across the room to include Terri. They opened there arms and pulled there friend into the embrace. Julie spoke first. "Do you know how much we love you. Do you know how important you are to use. We love you, Terri!"
Terri, a little thrown but happy to be caught in this moment chose it to make things easier for her friends. "It's okay. I am prepared. I always knew that one of these days I would have to move out. I have stayed here for way to long. You two deserve to have the house to yourselves. You are a couple, you do not need to be sharing a house with me. I can start looking for apartments tomorrow. Maybe I can find one closer to the stable."
"What, why would you move out?" asked Betsy.
"Well, I know that you two wanted to talk to me and couldn't help but hear you say how much you were going to miss me. It's okay, really, it is probably time for me to be out on my own. I am just so grateful I have had this home for so long. But I can ..."
"Terri, we did need to talk to you but it is not about you moving out. This is YOUR home and we never want you to leave. If the time comes for us to move, we would want you to move with us. This is as much your home as it is either of ours. Okay?" This time it was Julie who spoke slowly, emphasizing each word.
"Really? Thanks. I don't know how I ever got so lucky to find you two." Terri hugged her friends, but as she pulled away her expression went from being relieved to perplexed. "Then what did you two want to talk to me about?"
"Um, could we sit down. Julie, is that tea ready? "
"Yeah, just pick a tea bag. The water is still steeping." She poured the steaming water into three mugs and handed them out. For the next couple of minutes, Julie and Betsy busied themselves with preparing there tea. Terri just sat and waited. Her deepest fear, her fear of being with out her family had been relieved. Something was definitely up but she knew that what ever it was, they were going to face it as a family.
Betsy turned and looked at her girlfriend, waiting for her to speak. Following her lead, Terri also turned to Julie. Julie opened her mouth to speak, shut it, opened it again, took a deep breath and finally asked. "Terri, does the name Tara McClay sound familiar to you?"
They watched there friend's face closely, looking for signs of understanding. Instead, they just saw confusion. "Tara McClay? Is that someone I should know?"
"You are Tara McClay." Julie couldn't believe she was being so blunt but she didn't want to test Terri's memory. She just wanted to give her the facts.
"Tara McClay. How did you find this out?"
"Do you remember that college kid who went camping with us last weekend? Well, she was showing pictures of the trip to one of her friends up at school and someone recognized you. Her name is Dawn Summers. I met with her Monday night. She told me that she knew you when you lived in Sunnydale, California. You were a junior at the university when you disappeared. Am I going to fast?"
Tara thought that Julie was going both too fast and too slow at the same time. She couldn't believe that after all these years, someone had finally recognized her. She tried the names in her head. Tara McClay from Sunnydale, California. It seemed odd, she would never have imagined living in California. It all sounded so foreign to her. Why didn't those names sound familiar?
She looked up at her friends and realized that they were waiting for a response. What could she tell them? Why did they look both hopeful and scared at the same time? "Could you just go on? If I start asking questions, I won't stop."
Betsy jumped into the conversation. "Julie went up to meet Dawn and learned that you had lived at the Summer's house for about six months. In the house, it was you, Dawn, her older sister Buffy and Willow."
"Wait a minute, I lived with people named Dawn, Buffy, and Willow. How could I forget those names, no matter how hard I was hit in the head!" Betsy and Julie snickered at this comment. They didn't want to admit that they had made fun of those names on there way to meet Buffy and Dawn. To them, the names reminded them of a Gidgit movie.
"Yes, you somehow forgot those names. Do you want to hear more. This is so much." Betsy didn't want to push her friend. They had told her enough but Terri immediately started nodding, ready for more. "Okay, what else did we learn. Um, well, when you first started hanging out with them, you were very shy and you stuttered. As you continued to spend time with them, the stuttering went a way. Here is a picture. That is Dawn, you, Willow and Buffy. That was taken at Buffy's birthday party, it was about a month or two before you disappeared."
Tara looked at the picture. They appeared nice enough. She was smiling and looked happy. The picture didn't trigger any memory. She looked at it and the image of herself was of a stranger. "How did I meet them?"
"Well, apparently you and Willow became friends through a campus Wicca group." Julie held back from explaining that Willow was her girlfriend. They had agreed that they would not try to force Terri into the patterns of old relationships. She would only meet them as friends. "Oh, yeah, you're astrological sign is Scorpio. You are now 26 years old. You were studying Art Therapy..."
"I was a witch? I'm a Scorpio? I'm old? Damn, I was hoping I was 24. Wait, I WAS A WITCH?"
"That is what they told us. We also learned that you were always extremely sensitive. You were able to sense people's feelings very quickly. You took very good care of Dawn. She was just a teenager and her mother had died. You made sure she that she ate healthy and did her homework. Even after you moved out, you kept a very close eye on her. She loves you like a sister."
"What about my family?"
Betsy and Julie looked at each other with concern. Julie leaned over and said, " The truth is that they are your family."
"No, what about my parents?"
"Apparently, You had run away from home to go to college. You supported yourself on a scholarship. Your father and brother, Donnie came to take you home when you were about to turn twenty. Your friends wouldn't let them take you against your will. Because you refused to leave school and your friends, your father basically disowned you."Julie hoped that the harsh truth would satisfy Tara but it did not.
"What about my mother?"
"You mother was a wonderful, kind, caring woman. We know that because that is what kind of woman you are." Betsy could see that Tara had caught her using the past tense so she continued. "She died when you were seventeen. We really do not know anything else. I'm sorry."
Tara put her head down in her arms. Julie and Betsy wondered if this last bit of news had finally brought there friend's memory back or if this was all too much. They each reached across the table and placed a hand on Tara's shoulder. The were startled as Tara quickly sat up, brushing there hands off. "Why can't I remember? What happened? I have always wanted to know who I was. I always thought just knowing my real name would bring back the memories. Why can't I remember? I look at this picture and see strangers. Julie, Betsy, what is wrong with my head. Why can't I remember?"
"Honey, we don't know why. It is so complex. It.."
"I'm sorry. I don't mean to put you on the spot. I have heard all the promises. That maybe one day I will look at a bird and remember. So I look at ever bird I see. I have heard that one day I will hear a song and remember, so I constantly listen to the radio. Or one day I will see a picture and remember, so I look at every picture. I search every face I see. Now, I look at these pictures and can remember nothing. I have heard all the maybe's and I am beginning to realize that I will never remember."
"Your right, you may never remember."
"BETSY!"
"No Julie, it is the truth. I may never remember."
"Right, Terri may never regain her memory but we did not tell her about Dawn and everyone to just help her remember. Ter, we told you because we want you to have options. We want you to know that there are people out there who are still looking for you. There are people out there who are missing you. Buffy flew out here yesterday so that she could possibly see you. What I have learned and heard in the last three days is that we were not the first persons to discover you. Ter, you are loved, not just by us but by these people from California. They would like to see you. How would you feel about that?"
"When?"
"They would like to meet you tomorrow for lunch. I have taken the day off so I can go with you. How would you feel about going?"
"Feel, feel... I feel scared, excited, nervous, sick to my stomach. But I can not not go."
"Good. I will be with you the whole time. Okay? And Terri, I still think those memories are somewhere in your head. I still think you will remember what you need to. Just look at the name you chose. Did you know that Stevens is the name of Dorm that you lived in for your first two years of college. I don't think you just chose that name as a coincidence. I believe that you have to trust your instincts. And you had better remember that we are there for you at all times. Okay?"
"Okay."
"So, do you want to talk some more?"
"No thanks, I just want to just have another cup of tea. You two should go to bed, its okay. Really. I am fine."
"Okay, good night." Julie stood up and hugged her friend. Betsy followed suit and the two head out the door. But then Betsy stopped and turned around and asked, "Do you want us to call you Tara?"
Her friend's consideration made her smile and she shook her head and said, "No, to you , I will always be Terri."
"If you ever change your mind, you just let us know."
"Thanks and good night." Tara continue to sit at the table. She looked at the picture and the people in the picture. Buffy, Willow, and Dawn. She reached for a peace of paper and a pen and sat and wrote out all their names. Dawn Summers. Buffy Summers. Willow? Tara McClay. No bells went off in her head and she decided to take that as a positive sign. There could be two types of bells and one of them would be a warning bell. She was scared and confused but she knew that she was not in danger.