Disclaimers etc. are same as before.
This part is rated R – and there is some AngstThoughts in
italicsChapter 14The morning after the memorable night before, Willow was the first to stir awake and soon a blissful smile appeared on her face when she found herself spooned around Tara’s beautiful sleeping form. Both witches were naked under the bed covers with their legs tangled up in a show of intimacy that gave testament to their night of passionate lovemaking.
Willow felt so incredibly good and was unable to resist stroking her lover’s smooth and enticing skin. She knew she had to get up soon to start her day – but she needed to savour the snugly closeness to her baby for as long as possible.
Just as Willow sighed inwardly and made to pull away to get out of bed, Tara who had started to stir mumbled a sleepy protest and grabbed hold of Willow’s retreating hand.
“Go back to sleep love, don’t worry I’ll hold you” Willow cooed soothingly into Tara’s ear and settled fully back unto the bed. She started to stroke Tara’s arm gently and lovingly – soothing her back to sleep.
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About thirty minutes later – Willow was sat on her bed now fully clothed. She was watching her lover start to stir fully awake. Earlier, she had finally managed to extricate herself without waking the sleeping blonde. Then she had showered and gotten dressed in record time, packed the things she needed for the day into her bag, then noticing her baby was stirring had moved back to the bed.
Blinking sleepily and then trying to focus, Tara started to smile when the first thing she focused on was her beautiful redhead sat by her side obviously watching her.
“Morning my sleeping beauty” said Willow leaning in to kiss her baby sweetly on the lips.
“Mmm – morning baby, what time is it?” replied Tara after fully kissing Willow back.
“About eleven”
“Wow that late? On second thought I’m not that surprised - you wore me out last night!” said Tara who by now had sat up and was giving a sultry half smile as she sought her lover’s eyes.
Only problem was – her lover’s eyes had wandered downwards and were now gazing with desire at her gloriously naked breasts.
Suddenly Willow seemed to snap out of her daze and frantically she grabbed hold of the sheet around Tara’s waist with both hands and pulled it up to cover Tara’s ample breasts. Then still holding the sheet in place Willow scooted closer and leaned in to lock eyes with her bemused looking girlfriend and then she spoke in a rather husky tone of voice.
“God baby! Can you blame me? Just looking at you can make me lose control of my senses…. you’re just so tempting!” Willow paused to kiss Tara’s ever so tempting and pouting lips before pulling back to continue.
“And you are such a vixen! – flashing your sexy breasts at me, making me forget what I wanted to tell you…. you know you make me wanna stay right here and start with the lovemaking again, oh yeah I would so love to do that – but I need to be responsible and take care of my girl properly and that means I mustn’t let my hormones get the better of me – I mean I’ve already worn you out, so for now no more…. Hey! you’re laughing at me….” Willow breathlessly tacked on to the end of her babble fest when she noticed her lover’s eyes start to sparkle with mirth.
At that last statement from the redhead, Tara’s mirth turned into full-blown laughter. Using one hand to secure the sheet to her chest, she pulled Willow into an awkward hug with the other and then trying to quell her laughter she spoke in an adoring tone.
“God Willow I love you so much! But I’ll um, stop being a tempting vixen and listen to what you have to tell me”
Willow pulled back with a slightly perplexed but adorable look on her face – she still wasn’t sure exactly what she’d done to cause such mirth in her girlfriend.
“Oh. Okay baby – er, I guess that’s good…. and I love you so much too, you know” said the redhead, whilst mentally shrugging off her slight confusion regarding Tara’s mirth.
“I know” replied Tara contentedly, having almost succeeded in composing herself.
Tara was totally besotted with her cute babbling love. Sometimes she felt as if her heart would burst from the love she had for and received from Willow – it was just so amazing how her heart would swell with even more love over things like Willow’s unique babbling thoughts and the quirky way she expressed what she was thinking. Plus the fact that the redhead could sometimes get perplexed over not knowing how amusing her babbling could be - made Tara love her Willow even more.
The lovers shared a sweet moment as they pulled out of their embrace, but still gazed at one another with an air of contentment that lingered even when Tara spoke, thus breaking the silence.
“So Sweetie – what did you want to tell me?” asked the blonde
“Oh yeah, well I just wanted to tell you what I’ve got to do today and plan the rest of the day with you – you’ve got a paper to finish writing don’t you baby?” said Willow
“Uh huh” Tara acknowledged with a slight groan then continued with “But what do you have to do today?”
“I’ve got some course work I want to submit early and then I need to go sort out administrative stuff for my new job – luckily the office is not too far from campus. Then I’m meeting Oz at the Espresso Pump at three – he called me yesterday, said he wanted to talk to me.” stated Willow noting that Tara had perked up attentively and was about to respond.
“Oh? Sweetie how come you didn’t tell me… did he say what he wanted to talk to you about?” asked the blonde.
“No he didn’t baby. Sorry I didn’t tell you – I was more focused on celebrating with my birthday girl yesterday” said Willow with a quick smile, then she had to add “You’re okay with my meeting up with him aren’t you?” in a gentle questioning tone.
“Yeah sweetie I’m okay with it…. if it turns out to be something major we’ll deal with it together as we decided.” Tara replied looking back unwaveringly at Willow who was now satisfied that Tara was indeed okay with the impending meeting.
“Okay, that’s cool. So are you gonna work on your paper at home or will you come to campus with me and work in the library?”
“Uh uh sweetie – as much as I’d love to be with you for a while longer, I think I’ll opt for home – you really did wear me out, you know – but in a very good way!” Tara gave a sexy little smile and batted her lashes a little at her lover.
Willow could never resist that come-hither look. In a slight daze she leaned forward to cup her lover’s cheek as she fervently kissed those sexy lips - then forcing herself to pull away slightly and with her eyes closed - Willow spoke in a slightly husky tone.
“Tara – you totally gorgeous vixen of mine, before I dare open my eyes…. promise me that when I do open them – you’ll give me a sweet little kiss on my cheek after which I’m hoping you’ll let me go make us a quick brunch – because right now I’m SO close to dumping today’s plans in favour of surrendering to your vixen-y ways!”
Having said that – Willow cautiously opened her eyes and scowled good humouredly when she saw Tara’s eyes sparkling with barely controlled mirth. To Tara’s credit though - she managed to keep a straight face as she spoke.
“I love you Willow. I know you’ve got important things to do today, so I’ll be good and go take a shower while you make us brunch, then I’ll come join you downstairs” Then she gave Willow a sweet little kiss on the cheek that somehow felt erotic to Willow. After a tiny pause and with a hint of mirth still present - Tara had to say
“Um, you’re not moving sweetie – go on now, so I can get out of bed without your saying I’m a vixen for flashing my naked body at you!”
“Oh right, yeah moving…. to go make brunch…. it’ll be ready when you come downstairs baby… and I love you too” Willow said trying to shake thoughts of her naked lover out of her head as she scurried off the bed, grabbed her bag and scampered out of the room fast.
Tara for her own part finally released the giggles that had been dying to erupt from her - it wasn’t until moments later that she was composed enough to get out of bed and all she could think was
God how I love her!!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Meanwhile outside the Summers residence - at about the same time as Willow got downstairs to prepare brunch – Xander Harris pulled up in his car. He made sure he parked his car farther down the street than he normally would, such that he could see anyone leaving the house without being seen himself.
Xander had taken an early lunch break and was more than happy to spend it waiting outside Buffy’s house. He wanted to speak to Willow in private and had come up with a plan – a plan that was dependent on if anyone came out of the house whilst it was still his break time. So he sat in his car and watched and waited.
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By the time Willow and Tara had finished their brunch, it was almost twelve noon. Tara walked Willow to the door as the redhead was saying that she was glad Buffy’s note said she would be back home by two o’clock, meaning that Tara would have someone to keep her company. Tara agreed that it was perfect timing because that would give her just about enough time to finish writing her paper and then she leaned in to share a goodbye kiss and a hug with Willow as they stood by the front door.
As Willow stepped out of the house – Xander who had been watching, started up his car and drove towards his more usual parking spot – making sure to stop not quite directly in front of the house. He couldn’t believe his luck that Willow was alone – he had been expecting both witches to be together as usual and had already thought up how he would get to speak to Willow alone. But Willow had just made things easier for him by stepping out on her own. Parking his car by the kerb, he called out to the redhead.
“Hey Will – need a ride somewhere?”
“Xander – what are you doing here?” asked Willow slightly startled to see her friend.
“I was just coming to the house to see you” he lied, wanting to make it seem as if he wouldn’t have minded Tara knowing he was there to speak privately to Willow – when in reality he had actually planned to make sure Tara didn’t know.
“Really? What’s up Xand – shouldn’t you be at work?” the redhead asked.
“I’m on my lunch break and I’m hoping you can spare some time – I need to talk to you about something.”
“Sure – I’ve got some time – particularly since you’d be giving me a ride” the redhead walked around and settled herself into the passenger seat, then turned to her friend who asked ‘where to?’ as he started up the car and started to drive – Willow told him UC Sunnydale campus then it occurred to her to ask “Say, how did you know I’d be home?”
“Oh I saw Buffy this morning as I dropped Anya at the Magic Box and she mentioned something about you and Tara saying you didn’t have an early start today – so I just decided to try my luck” responded Xander, truthfully this time. He then asked after Tara and listened to Willow’s response followed by further small talk. They chatted in their usual manner all the way to the campus agreeing that they would find somewhere convenient to talk after Willow had dropped off her course work.
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Later that day at about one in the afternoon – Willow Rosenberg was one aggravated redhead. If anyone had asked her at that precise moment how she was feeling – she wouldn’t have been able to answer exactly. What she did know was that after her talk with Xander – she had eventually decided that the best thing to do was to try to put the discussion out of her mind for the time being. So, five minutes after she’d left Xander - she was walking to the office of her new employer and she was reminding herself to stay calm, as it definitely wouldn’t do to get there feeling all riled up or whatever…. because of Xander….
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Meanwhile at home – Tara had been diligently writing her paper. Actually typing was a more appropriate word because she was sat at the dining table typing it up on Willow’s laptop. She was quite pleased at her progress and in fact just before two o’clock she had finished and had even read over and edited her work to her satisfaction.
As she waited for the pages of her write-up to finish printing - it came as no surprise that her mind drifted to her girlfriend.
She smiled when she thought about her Willow and how totally loving and wonderful she was – the passion and desire they shared took Tara’s breath away. Just thinking about last night and the other indescribable times they’d made sweet love brought goose bumps to Tara’s skin. Regardless of the rough times life threw at them, the blonde knew she was so blessed to be with Willow – she could spend hours on end recounting the reasons why.
There were also the many little things that mattered so much. For instance it hadn’t skipped her notice that Willow had found time to hook up the printer to the laptop for her. That was her sweetheart, always taking such good care of her, in fact spoiling her - for instance with her birthday surprises…. and always thinking ahead and doing such thoughtful things…. and in general always wanting to help others….
Tara continued to sit with a besotted smile on her face as she thought some more about how amazing her girlfriend was.
But soon Tara’s smile changed into a slight frown. Unfortunately, sometimes when one has lots of time in which to think – the mind can conjure up unpleasant thoughts.
And right then Tara was thinking about Willow’s meeting with Oz later that day and a worrying thought emerged from her subconscious. She tried not to panic but to think things through rationally, but the conclusions she was coming to were not helping at all.
Tara was so immersed in her troubled thoughts that she jumped when she heard Buffy call her name.
“Tara? – are you okay?” then “Oh sorry - I didn’t mean to startle you….” said Buffy who was worried at the expression on her friend’s face and the fact that something must be wrong if Tara hadn’t even heard the front door shut as she came in just now.
“Oh H-hi Buffy, I didn’t hear you come in” Tara said distractedly.
“Yeah I figured that much…. has something happened? You look worried….”
“No nothing happened – It’s just…. I’m just… I’m worried about Willow.” Tara finally blurted. She had decided to just take the plunge and she knew she could confide in Buffy especially since they had become much closer lately.
“Why? What’s going on…?” Buffy asked as she moved to take a seat.
“Willow’s meeting up with Oz at three and I’m worried something might happen…..” the blonde witch trailed off with a frown as she seemed to get lost on a particular train of thought going on in her head.
“What do you mean Tara? You trust Will right?” Buffy asked trying not to sound judgemental, while hoping that the faith she had in Tara wasn’t about to be shaken – she was quite relieved when Tara’s next words allayed that particular concern.
“Of course I do Buffy – it’s Oz I’m not so sure about….“ Tara paused and then gathering her resolve she proceeded to confide in Buffy that she’d mentioned to Willow how she suspected that Oz was still in love with the redhead. Then she explained how a sudden niggling fear about Oz not being able to control the werewolf in him had surfaced.
Tara was quick to point out that she knew Oz was a good person, but she also pointed out that though Oz said he now had total control of the wolf in him - she was now all of a sudden worried. Worried because the last time he had come back he had also thought he was in control and yet things had gone horribly wrong that day he had changed and attacked Tara.
Hating to have to remember that awful day again – Tara steeled herself and told Buffy how it was essentially Oz’s emotional state of mind over Willow that had triggered off his changing into the wolf in broad daylight.
So, as much as she wanted to trust Oz now and believe he had control of the wolf – she couldn’t help be worried because no one but Oz can actually know what he feels for Willow – and what if he isn’t in as much control of the wolf as he thinks.
Buffy could feel the anxiety coming off of Tara in waves and she was about to say something when Tara beat her to it and piped up again after quickly checking the laptop for the time.
“It’s just twenty minutes past two – Buffy I want to go over there….” Tara started to say but was interrupted by Buffy.
“Whoa Tara hold on, let’s think about this. I do understand your worry - but trust is an issue here - I don’t think it’s a good idea to just barge in on them. I was with Will when she got the call from Oz and I actually asked her if she had a reason to be worried since Oz didn’t want to say what he wanted to talk about. Will said no and that even if there was she could deal – so I.…” It was Tara’s turn to interrupt Buffy.
“But Buffy, Willow probably meant deal with emotional stuff about maybe how he feels about her and not deal with him changing into a werewolf. Look I know what you mean about trust being an issue and not to just barge in – I know Will can look after herself mostly, but I don’t want to take a chance only for things to go wrong and she gets hurt!” said Tara in an anxious tone, then she paused to calm herself before she continued.
“It’s only a few minutes ago that I started thinking what if Oz can’t really know how well he can control the werewolf.… but you’re right I can’t just barge in, I mean Will and Oz are friends and I don’t want him to think I have a problem with that or make him feel bad knowing I’m worried about the werewolf thing – of course it’s Willow I plan to tell my worry to and not him…. What if I go and just hang out somewhere nearby to make sure they’re okay – then after I could talk to Will about it?”
“Tell you what Tara…. what if I go? Hopefully nothing happens that would need slayer intervention… then um, let’s see… whenever Will and Oz leave I could get Will alone and explain that you were a bit worried – but you guys can talk about it properly when she gets home. I’ll probably give her a ride back if she has no further plans. So, what do you say? – I think it’d be somehow better if I turn up and not you”
“Yeah Buffy, I think you’re right – thank you. I’m so sorry I’m dumping this on you, I just can’t seem to stop worrying… I don’t want to leave even the smallest chance…” Tara was interrupted gently.
“It’s okay Tara – you know you don’t have to explain - we all agreed to take good care of each other” Buffy said patting Tara’s hand kindly, then getting up she added “Speaking of which – I’m kinda glad you’re going to be home when Dawn gets back from school – you’ll make her eat proper food and not junk!”
“Count on it Buffy” Tara replied with a smile.
“Right - I’ll be off real soon, I just need to go freshen up quickly. I’ve been training at the Magic Box all day” the slayer said as she headed upstairs.
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Much later – Buffy was seated in her jeep drumming her fingers on the steering wheel. She was parked in a by-road facing the Espresso Pump coffee shop. It was situated across from her on a main road and at the same time tucked in a corner of another by-road perpendicular to the main road. Buffy was certain that she was out of sight of anyone who left the coffee shop – at least anyone who didn’t know to look for her there.
When she had arrived it was a minute to three and she wasn’t surprised that the ever-punctual Willow was already in the coffee shop. Willow’s fiery red hair made her easy to spot through the window – the redhead had her side facing Buffy and she appeared to be reading something as she took a sip of what could only be a cup of her favorite mocha.
At exactly three, Buffy spotted Oz walk into the coffee shop, pause to look round and then walk over to Willow’s table. At that point Buffy relaxed a little, because she no longer had to worry about Oz driving by and seeing her – he had obviously walked or parked his truck elsewhere on some other road.
Once Oz and Willow looked settled into talking – complete with whatever food and drinks a waiter had placed between them – Buffy decided that even though she was outside, she still needed to give them as much privacy as possible – so keeping the two in her peripheral vision, she settled on watching the shop’s door.
Diligently Buffy stayed watching in that manner. Music played in the jeep – but the slayer wasn’t really listening to it. Instead she sat staying alert whilst drumming her fingers at intervals and thinking idle mundane thoughts so as not to become too bored. She also glanced properly at Willow and Oz once in a while just to be sure – and once or twice she noticed Willow seemed to be gesticulating quite a bit with her hands – but otherwise everything looked alright.
A long while later - Buffy was thinking that she would definitely have to score herself a mocha once her friend came out of the shop. She was also thinking that she would need to time things properly whenever she saw that Will and Oz were about to leave the shop - she planned to sprint over to join them and make it appear – for Oz’s benefit - to be a casual chance meeting.
Little did Buffy know that the next few minutes were about to prove that sometimes the best laid plans did not always go smoothly.
The slayer jumped a little when she heard a rap on her passenger side window – she looked across and used the auto switch by her side to roll the window down when she saw that there was an elderly man standing in the street wanting to talk to her.
The old man politely asked if Buffy would be kind enough to reverse so his equally elderly friend would find it easier to park their own car in the parking slot in front of Buffy’s.
Buffy could see the car in question was halfway alongside hers waiting in the middle of the road. So after a quick glance at Willow and Oz she nodded and said ‘sure’ to the old man who thanked her and went to get back into his own car as Buffy started up the jeep.
After another quick glance at the coffee shop, Buffy turned round after putting the jeep into reverse gear and reversed a little distance and then waited for the other car to pull in front before she drove forward again - back into place.
Unfortunately, at the exact moment Buffy had turned her head – Willow and Oz had chosen that moment to stand up and leave the Espresso pump - parting outside the door and going in opposite directions.
Needless to say – Buffy totally missed seeing them leave. Looking through her windshield back at the coffee shop once she had returned to her original spot – Buffy groaned out loud when she couldn’t see any sign of Willow and Oz.
“Oh man! Would you believe it?” said the slayer out loud as she pulled the jeep’s key out of the ignition and scrambled out as fast as possible, so fast that the elderly chaps hadn’t even had a chance to climb out of their car and say thanks to her as they had planned to.
The slayer wheezed past in the direction of the Espresso pump and when she got to the junction of the by-road she was on and the major road, she immediately looked to her left and scanned the road that way first - seeing as that was the direction she’d seen Oz emerge from earlier.
Buffy heaved a huge sigh of relief when she saw Oz walking alone in the distance. She watched him for a while just to be certain – and sure enough she saw him reach his truck and get into it and drive off alone. This made Buffy conclude that for whatever reason Willow was walking home or walking anywhere else she needed to be.
That sorted - Buffy decided to still go get a much-needed mocha. She knew that she would still get home before Willow or even catch up with her and be able to give her a ride.
The slayer had just crossed the road and was about to head through the coffee shop’s door when she was totally startled to hear Willow call her name from just a few feet away to her right.
“Hey Buffy – fancy meeting you here” said the redhead who had just rounded the corner right next to the shop.
“Will ! – you came back….um, I just want to get a mocha….” said Buffy whose brain wasn’t at its most alert at that exact point in time.
“Yeah I forgot my….” Willow started to say, then after an abrupt pause she segued into saying “Hey, what do you mean I came back – how did you know I’d been here?”
“Well ‘cause I was watching you.…” Buffy could get no further.
“What?! You were watching me - why? What do you mean watching me, what’s going on….?”
“Calm down Will, let me explain. See, Tara was worried….” Buffy stopped abruptly when she saw the expression on Willow’s face and she mentally slapped herself for not thinking how that would sound even worse to Willow.
“Huh? Tara sent you? Buffy what’s going on?” asked Willow in a stricken voice.
“Willow please listen, look I promise it’s nothing bad – yes Tara was worried but….” Buffy had to stop this time because she found she was speaking to Willow’s back as the redhead had turned and was heading into the Espresso Pump. Buffy felt like screaming in frustration at her very own stupid tactlessness…. it was just that her friend had caught her off guard - but dammit she had to fix this and get through to Willow.
So she followed and found Willow bending down to pick up a rather large brown envelope that was against the wall next to the table she’d been sitting at not long ago. Buffy figured that was obviously what the redhead had forgotten. As Willow straightened Buffy went to stand next to her and spoke gently.
“Will please – I was saying it all wrong. It’s not what you think…. I wish you’d just let me….” once again she had to stop when Willow interrupted her.
“Um Buffy, I figure from the keys in your hand that the jeep is here somewhere – so could you please just take me home? I need to hear this from Tara” the redhead said in a flat voice whilst fidgeting with the strap of her shoulder bag and trying to avoid direct eye contact with her friend.
“Sure Will – the jeep is just across the road” Buffy said with an unhappy sigh, as she pointed. The redhead was already moving when the slayer added “It’s open, I’ll join you in a minute”
As Willow left the shop Buffy hurried over to the counter and pushing some money across to the person serving she said “One large mocha please”
Barely a minute later, Buffy took two large gulps of her drink before getting in her car to join her friend. One look at the redhead was enough to tell the slayer that Willow was in absolutely no mood for any kind of conversation. She hated to think that she was the cause - however unintentional - of her friend’s current air of dejection and she silently vowed she would make it up to her. But Buffy knew that Tara would make things better - so she wasted no time in pulling the jeep out and driving off. The sooner she got Willow home to Tara the better.
It was a very somber ride. Willow sat in subdued silence with her mind stubbornly fixated on the single thought that her already wonky day had just gotten wonkier and crappier. While Buffy tried to listen to the music playing to take her mind off the unhappy vibes she was getting from Willow.
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Meanwhile at the Summers house. At about the same time as Willow and Buffy had started their journey home – Dawn and Tara who had finished eating about twenty minutes ago, were seated together at the dining table.
Tara was helping Dawn with her History homework. They were almost through with it when Dawn just had to put her pen down and look worriedly at Tara.
“Tara – what’s wrong?” asked the teenager.
“Nothing Dawn – why do you ask?”
“All through lunch you were distracted and you kept glancing at my watch… and now that we’re almost done with my homework you’re acting the same way – please tell me what’s wrong… I mean has something happened.”
“No Dawn, nothing’s happened” replied Tara whilst thinking
Please let nothing have happened!“If you say so” was Dawn’s despondent comeback – she just knew something was up but Tara thought it best to leave her out of it.
Dawn kept silent for a while and then thought to try another tactic. So she perkily said
“I had so much fun at your party last night! Willow show knows how to plan a great party” and she was relieved to see Tara brighten up and smile at her before saying “Yeah – she sure does. Everything was so amazing yesterday”. With an answering grin Dawn went back to her homework thinking in relief that at least it sounded like all was well with Willow and Tara – and in her mind that meant anything else could be sorted. Anything, including the ‘unknown issue’ that was making Tara find it necessary to pretend to read her boring History textbook!
Tara’s obvious pretence was further highlighted by the way she sprung out of her seat when she heard the front door open.
“Buffy – is that you? Did everything go okay…. Will….!” Tara’s questions came to an abrupt halt with a squeak of her girlfriend’s name, because as she rushed into the entrance hallway to talk to Buffy – she instead came face to face with and almost collided with the redhead but somehow managed to stop in the nick of time.
Tara’s heart constricted and her breath hitched as she saw a look of such hurt and disappointment etched in the emerald eyes of her love.
“Will? Baby – what’s the matter….?” She instinctively reached out to comfort - but to her dismay Willow turned away abruptly and walked into the living room without uttering a single word.
It was then that the blonde witch noticed Buffy hovering uncomfortably by the door – looking like she wanted to blend into the plaster work of the nearest wall.
“Buffy? Please - what happened….?” Tara started to ask in a desperate voice, but the slayer interrupted her.
“Tara – I’ll tell you how the plan went wrong later, but right now Willow needs you to explain why I was there… please just go to her” Buffy said coming forward a little after finally finding her backbone once again.
As Tara all but flew in the direction of the living room, Dawn cautiously walked into the hallway clutching her pen in her hand.
“Buffy what’s happening? Why is Willow mad at Tara and what have you got to do with it?”
“Hey Dawn – come on, let’s go to the kitchen and I’ll tell you…. damn I need another drink!” replied Buffy who had downed the rest of her lukewarm mocha in the brief and awkward walk from the car to the front door.
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As Tara walked into the living room, her heart took another lashing when she saw her darling redhead standing facing the window with head slightly bowed and shoulders slightly slumped.
Tara wanted to rush over and enfold her girl in her arms – but something told her to take things slowly. So instead she walked closer and noticed there was about a foot of space between Willow and the window. So Tara moved closer still and tried somewhat to catch Willow’s gaze as she quietly and tentatively said “Will?”
Tara frowned a little when Willow turned and moved away a little more and then her heart skipped a beat when she thought she caught a tiny sniffle coming from the redhead. The mere thought that Willow could be crying or about to cry whilst trying to hide it by turning away – made Tara feel sick.
“Willow? Honey please I….” she was interrupted when Willow spoke.
“Ta-ra…. don’t you trust me?” asked Willow in a very forlorn sounding voice.
“Oh baby. Of course I do – I swear I do…. I can….” once again Tara was interrupted.
“Then why did you ask Buffy to…. to spy on me” asked the redhead in what could only be described as a brave little voice.
Tara could stand it no longer. She needed to banish every single bit of hurt she had caused and she needed to do it now. So she walked purposefully right next to her girl and placed her hand on her shoulder gently.
“Baby, I swear it wasn’t like that - I just needed to know you’d be safe. Willow please look at me – let me explain.…” Tara implored circling halfway round to face Willow and noting with relief that she was being met halfway. Next she gently used her right hand to lift Willow’s face up so she could gaze at the emerald eyes she loved so much.
Tara’s breath hitched in her throat and her heart lurched when she saw that indeed Willow had been extremely close to tears. She engulfed her baby in a warm embrace and whispered brokenly into her ear.
“Oh Willow – darling I’m so sorry…. I never meant to hurt you…. not ever! I love you so much – you must know I would never deliberately do anything to hurt you.” she then pulled back a little and placed a fervent kiss on Willow’s brow then she said
“Baby come on – let’s sit and I’ll explain”
Willow felt Tara clasp her hand almost desperately and she allowed Tara to lead her to the couch. They both sat and Tara didn’t let go of Willow’s hand but instead clasped it in her lap as though it was her lifeline – then she started to explain as best she could why Buffy ended up doing what she did and she also made sure she let Willow know that it had all been her own idea and that Buffy had actually been the one to point out that they needed to ensure trust wasn’t broken.
Tara realised that for whatever reason – Willow must have discovered Buffy before Buffy had a chance to explain that she was in no way there to spy on Willow secretly.
So with that in mind she made sure to state every single detail of her discussion with Buffy and how Buffy was supposed to catch up with Willow immediately and let her know what was going on and she also mentioned how Buffy also helped her realise that Oz was a friend and they needed to consider his feelings and try to ensure he didn’t have to know of any worry(however little) they might have about him.
Willow listened attentively and didn’t say anything until Tara had finished – and then looking far more composed and much calmer than earlier Willow had to ask
“But Tara – why didn’t you just tell me you’d been worrying about Oz being able to control the werewolf around me. I mean this morning I even asked you if you were okay with my meeting up with him and you said you were….” Willow trailed off waiting for a reply.
“I know baby, but I didn’t start getting worried until I had time to think about it. I guess it probably was niggling subconsciously until today. So, because I only found out today that he’d asked to meet up with you and without knowing exactly what he wanted to talk to you about – my mind just went to a scary place and I just didn’t want to take a chance that could lead to your getting hurt…. I just kept worrying over how Oz had also thought he could control the werewolf before….
Willow – right now I just need you to know that I trust you completely, I really do. Today was just about me needing to know you’d be safe” Tara ended with a very sincere voice.
Willow was silent a long while and seemed to be making her mind up about something then she looked up at Tara and spoke.
“You know what Tara? I’ve had a really weird and very long day, I need to go take a shower and we can talk later” that said Willow got up and in the process her hand was dislodged from Tara’s.
Tara for her own part felt quite bereft by the loss of contact and also quite anxious, so after a brief moment she sprang up from her seat and hurried after Willow.
“Will? Will wait! – baby are you mad at me?” Tara asked sounding a little desperate as she caught up with Willow near the foot of the stairs. Instinctively the blonde reached for and took hold of the redhead’s hand again.
“I’m not mad at you Tara… I just… I need some time alone to think about stuff…. like I said I’ve had a really weird day and I just need to sort through everything, then when we talk I’ll tell you about it” with that Willow once again unclasped her hand from Tara’s and turned to climb up the steps without a trace of her usual bounciness.
Tara just watched her go, this time feeling totally bereft. When Willow disappeared from view, the blonde witch slumped dejectedly to sit down on the last but one step. Elbows on her thighs – Tara dragged both hands through her hair and ended up more or less holding her head in her hands while she succumbed to depressing babbling thoughts.
God she IS mad at me! Dammit I never even got a kiss - she must be really mad at me…. and god I hurt her…. I hurt my Willow…. oh baby please believe me - I never meant to hurt you, never.… I just wanted you to be safe….Soon Tara felt a gentle hand on her shoulder and looked up to see Buffy gazing at her sadly with Dawn hovering behind and looking on anxiously.
“Tara – I take it things didn’t go too well….” Buffy quietly stated the obvious.
“Oh God Buffy, I’ve hurt her! I never meant to… I just wanted to make sure nothing happened to her… but god I’ve really hurt her…. I don’t know what to do… she looks so sad and she ….” Buffy interrupted gently.
“Tara let’s go into the living room – come on…. it’ll be okay” said the slayer squeezing her friend’s shoulder in a comforting gesture.
Tara stood up and followed Buffy to the living room with Dawn once again hovering behind while trying to quell her anxiety at the latest turn of events.
Buffy sat next to Tara on the couch while Dawn sat on a chair trying to be as unobtrusive as possible.
“I’m so sorry Tara – it’s my fault” said Buffy quietly - whilst vowing to herself once again that she would definitely make things up big time to Willow. Then she proceeded to tell Tara how things had gone wrong when she got distracted by the old guy and how she constantly put her foot in her mouth when she was caught off guard by Willow.
Tara listened and then told Buffy not to blame herself because she couldn’t have known things would pan out that way.
Dawn couldn’t keep quiet any longer.
“Tara, what did Will say when you explained it all?” the teenager asked.
“She said she’d had a weird day and needed sometime alone to think and that we can talk later…. she also said she’s not mad at me…. but she must be if she doesn’t want to talk to me now or be around me….” Tara trailed off unhappily.
“Don’t worry Tara – it’ll be okay. I’m sure Willow knows you trust her and that you really just wanted to keep her safe… and you know she said she had a weird day…. I mean you don’t know what Oz said and stuff….” Dawn said quite insightfully.
Tara hoped Dawn was right and then she started to wonder what exactly Willow meant about having a weird day.
“I guess I just need to do what she asked and give her some time alone” Tara said with a heavy sigh.
After an uncomfortable silence – Dawn decided that they should watch some TV and hope Willow would join them when she was ready.
But within five minutes Tara decided she couldn’t just do nothing - she needed to fix this and now! She said as much to Buffy and Dawn in a determined tone and then headed upstairs with a purposeful stride.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TBC.
Questions? Comments? – are greatly appreciated.
Oh and in answer to an obvious likely question – in the next update I hope to do flashbacks to the Willow/Xander, Willow/Oz talks. Couldn’t do so now - it would have made this update too long.… Okay – fine, I admit it was sorta a cliffhanger too
Sorry….
(Not sure exactly when the next update will be ready – but hopefully soon.)
WFB
Edited by: WannaFriendsBe at: 4/24/04 8:26 am
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Not that there is anything wrong with long updates of course, heh.
.
Look look, there's an update! ::Jeanne jumps around like a hyperactive over-excited child::
for standing up to Spike and telling him to leave her alone. Question is, has Spike got the message? We know how persistent Spike can be & he's not good at taking no for an answer when it comes to Buffy.
Oh, you've got me all intrigued now. I shall be reading this particular plot line very carefully.
too! 
So hot and steamy (no pun intended) & sweet & wow! You're writing skills blow me away sometimes, & when you create scenes like that one it just amazes me how good you are! 
Uh-oh, that's like heresy, I'm sorry 
please don't hurt me 
.) It's just, how much like Willow-babble was this?:
Definitely very interesting, I'll keep an eye on that one 
. Thanks for all the updates and long ones at that. And the shower scene was just ...
I'm missing my favourite fic 
saying my fic is your favorite.
for being so kind and for being a most gracious 'feedback-giver'. BTW I still can't get over part of your sig being from my fic - sincere thanks again for such a huge compliment.
no I don't. I just, tell you what I think, that's not award worthy. 
to do any editing - and believe me I need to do some major editing! I type in Microsoft Word and Ch. 13 is 12 pages long while Ch. 14 is 18 pages (my longest chapter yet!) - So that makes 30 pages that I need to edit & rid off all those ugly typos and yucky structuring!
As for Tara's intuitive feelings on Oz - please read on to find out more.... I'm glad the shower scene was to your liking - I wonder why such scenes are popular 
and 
make up soon.
