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 Post subject: FIC: The Crying Game (AU)
PostPosted: Wed Aug 14, 2002 8:00 am 
Title: The Crying Game

Author: ViX84

Feedback: I love feedback...so feed away!

Summary: Alternate universe! W/T meet in a different (only slightly angsty) situation. Not a supernatural story, except for some witch-craft...

Disclaimer: These characters are not mine *sniff*, they belong to Joss Whedon. I just needed to let them have some more smutty fun, and quality time together, since in their Buffy world they haven’t been treated very well…

Rating: R, for now...

_____________________________

Part One



The red-head looked up in surprise when she heard footsteps. It was nearly one in the morning and the place had usually been empty for several hours. It was Sunnydale after all; you were either healthy and asleep, or lying dead somewhere with a hole in your neck. So the Hospital didn’t do great business.



She saw a tall figure rush past, too quickly for her to see her face, and into the bathroom. She sighed, this was something she was used to. People seemed to think that the bathrooms were soundproof, and that no one outside would be able to hear a thing. She waited, tilting her head slightly. Then she heard the sobbing begin.



She’d been working five-hour shifts at Sunnydale Hospital for a few months now. At first she volunteered now and then, as a way of giving back to the community, as a candy stripper. Then one of the nurses ‘disappeared’ and they desperately needed someone to tend to the patient. She was a bit anxious at first, but slowly got used to the place. But the crying always got to her.



The girl in the bathroom was obviously trying to control the sobs, they were coming out jagged, painfully. The red-head was about to go in and see if the girl needed help when a heavy hand fell on her shoulder.



She turned to see one of the younger doctors, Doctor Stevensen, grinning at her. “Ms Rosenburg, how are you doing this evening?”. He winked at the young woman. She almost laughed out loud at his facial expression. He reminded her of a character out of ‘The Bold and the Beautiful’…not that she watched any of those shows. Well, not often…



“Uhh great, thanks”, she replied hesitantly. The sobs in the bathroom were louder now, slightly hysterical, and she really wanted to go in. She didn’t want the girl to do anything drastic.



He didn’t get the hint. “You finish at one, don’t you? Wanna go get a coffee?”



“Umm, well, see, I would...but, it’s Sunnydale, and things are closed early, and I don’t drink coffee anyway, so even if there was a place open, I wouldn’t be partaking in coffee drinking. And I don’t think…”, she paused for breath, “that’s a good idea”.



He tightened his grip on her arm. “I like it when you talk like that. Rushed and confused. You’ve got the school-girl thing happening, and it definitely works for you…C’mon, I’ll make us a hot drink at my apartment.”



She shook her head firmly. “Sorry, Doctor, you’re drinking on your own. I have to get home now.” She picked up her bag, tied her thick hair back with a ribbon, and smiled insincerely at him. “Thanks for the offer, though.”



On her way out, she quickly stepped into the bathroom. As soon as she opened the door the crying stopped, and was replaced by heavy, controlled breathing. She couldn’t see the girl anywhere, but one of the cubicles was locked. She walked slowly over to the door and asked quietly “are you OK?”.



A small voice, torn with misery, responded. “I am. Thank you.”



***



“Xand! What the hell are you doing?” A wide-eyed Buffy faced her friend confrontationally. She’d called him in the middle of the night, when she heard the pipes downstairs burst. He came over, after complaining bitterly, to her house to fix the bathroom plumbing, and after a while he closed the door. She had ignored the closed door at first, until she heard heavy breathing from the inside, and she began to worry. Then the walls started to shake, rhythmically, and she started to freak at the thought of him, well, pleasuring himself in her bathroom. She burst into the bathroom dramatically.



He stared back at her, trying desperately to come up with a witty, or at least realistic, response. What the hell was I thinking, he wondered gloomily, doing that in her bathroom of all places! Shit shit shit shit shit…



Xander’s terrified internal shitting was interrupted by the entrance of a sleepy Dawn. “Hey you guys”, she said before noticing the scene before her. “What are you up to…OH my GOD!”



She turned to Buffy accusingly. “I can’t believe you’d be with him, of all people!” she almost screamed. “He’s almost as bad as Spike!”



“Hey!” Buffy and Xander responded in unison.



“My ‘hey’ first” said Xander loudly, “thanks a lot, Dawnie!”



“As IF I’d be with Xander,” Buffy continued, repulsed by the thought.



“Then what’s with the breathless Buffy and the sweaty, pantless Xander, together in the bathroom?” Dawn answered stubbornly.



***



Joyce awoke to the sound of voices. She listened to her two daughters’ laughing, and Xander responding defensively, and smiled in the darkness. Dawn had only lived with them for about five months and she and Buffy were already great friends. Dawn had been living with Joyce’s ex-husband for the past fifteen years, and only seen Buffy and her mother during school holidays. But her father had re-married, and tried to ‘subtly’ ask her to leave. He felt that he presence would bring bad luck to the new marriage. Joyce hated him for the way he had treated her youngest daughter, but couldn’t help being pleased at having Dawn around again.



Joyce and Buffy had spent a lot of time preparing for Dawn’s arrival, planning different things for her to see and do, and people to meet. But in the end the plans didn’t work out, and Dawn ended up being babysat by Xander all the time, who was unemployed. Little did she know that Xander was employed, and Dawn had actually been spending a lot of the time with Spike, a vampire. Buffy, who trusted Spike – well, until he decided to tell Dawn all about his brief affair with her sister – didn’t think her mother would understand somehow.



***



Willow awoke the next morning to a loud knock at her front door.



“Ms Rosenburg, may I come in?”



She blushed, looking down at her nightgown. It was a summer nightie, made of thin blue lace, and didn’t leave much to the imagination. She decided he wouldn't make any advances. Well, not sexual ones. And she had capsicum spray around, in case he did. She let him in.



“Call me Willow,” she said, smiling.



“As you probably know, I’m the head of the HR at Sunnydale Hospital. I’ve been looking at your file closely, Ms Ros – sorry, Willow – and I have to tell you how impressed I am at your work for us. See, we’d love to give you a better job, or better pay at least, to encourage you to stay on with us. But you don’t seem to have any training, in being a nurse, or a secretary, or anything really. Yet you do so well...”



Willow looked down, ashamed. She felt like showing him her Magic Intermediate High Distinction Certificate from the local Witches Committee, but realised he would probably have a bad reaction. How could she tell him that a lot of her ‘comforting’ and ‘healing’ patients came from strong spells?



“Uhh, well, my mother was a psychologist and my father a doctor. I g-g-uess I just learnt naturally from them.” She couldn’t help the stammer.



He smiled a kind smile, that verged on patronizing. “Mm, that’s great. But perhaps you’ll consider doing a course at the Tafe? It’s only fourty minutes from here. And it’d do wonders for your resume!” He cleared his throat and adopted a more personal tone. “And the pay rise will be dramatic, and immediate!” He shook her hand and stood up to leave. “I hope you decide to take my advice”.



***



The pale light flickered in the small waiting room. The two inhabitants flicked through magazines, their faces etched with misery and pain. From the nurses’ common room, the radio station finished playing an REM song and began a Cat Stevens’ song, ‘Sad Lisa’. One of the nurses in the waiting room looked enquiringly at one of the girls. She knew that the girl was visiting a 'Liz'.



“Do you want me to turn the music off?"



The girl lifted her head from her lap and smiled weakly. “That’s OK. It’s a beautiful song, and my mother loves it.”



'Lisa Lisa, sad Lisa Lisa.

Her eyes like windows, trickle in rain

Upon the pain getting deeper.

Though my love wants to relieve her.

She walks alone from wall to wall.

Lost in her hall, she can't hear me.

Though I know she likes to be near me.

Lisa Lisa, sad Lisa Lisa.



She sits in a corner by the door.

There must be more I can tell her.

If she really wants me to help her.

I'll do what I can to show her the way.

And maybe one day I will free her.

Though I know no one can see her.'




The nurse nodded and left the room. Ten minutes later a doctor entered and looked at the two patients, as though assessing which was which. Eventually he came to a decision and approached the younger girl. “Miss Maclay”, he said quietly, “your mother’s awake if you want to see her.”



***



Anya came home that day in a fierce mood. Her university professor had publicly humiliated her, outdone her of all people, using unfathomable sexual terminology. They’d had a duel in front of the amused students, until Anya lost her cool and nearly attempted a vengeance spell.



She unlocked the door to the apartment she shared with Xander and looked rather dismissively at the note on the hall table: ‘at Buff’s, fixing toilet, back soon’ and began to make herself a cheese sandwich. Momentarily, she wondered why he was still at Buffy’s, and what his definition of ‘back soon’ must be. ‘Didn’t he go there in the middle of last night?’ she thought to herself.



Taking her first bite, the phone rang and she swore. She ignored it, it stopped, then began to ring again.



“What do you want? I’m eating a cheese sandwich.”



“It’s Xander.” He was out of breath, and she got a shock at how different he sounded. “Dawn’s had a bit on an…accident.”



“What? Where are you, and why are you talking about such strange, irrelevant events?”



“I slept over at Buffy’s last night, I was really tired and there was a bed made up. Then in the morning, Dawn begged me to take her for driving practice and, well, suddenly she slammed on the brake, and started screaming about a car. But I never saw a cat!”



Anya thought about a few things. Firstly, did he have sex with Buffy. Secondly, did he have sex with Dawn. Thirdly, did he have sex with Joyce. And, forth, was he, Dawn, and the cat alright. She decided the last question was the safest, judging from his emotional state.



When she asked, there was a long silence. Then he told her that Dawn was crying unstoppably, quite hysterically, and according to her, the cat was dead.



Anya said “OK” and hung up. She took another bite of her sandwich.



***



Willow was walking down the hallway, deep in thought, when she heard voices from one of the rooms. She slowed down and peeked into the room. She saw a beautiful woman lying in bed, her skin pale and her eyes closing with drowsiness and pain. A younger, even more beautiful woman, presumably her daughter, sat on the bed holding her hand. Willow struggled to hear, and made out just a few words. “I believe in you, Tara. You will do such good in this world. Thank the Goddess I have you as my daughter.”



Suddenly, Willow felt overwhelming guilt for listening, and sadness, that these two had to be separated. Willow and her mother hardly ever saw each other, whereas these two seemed so close. ‘It’s so unfair’, she whispered.



She went to the waiting room and picked up a magazine, looking for a trashy story. Anything, to distract her from the misery of death. She was deeply immersed in a story about Portia DeRossi’s breasts when a slight cough made her look up.



The girl she had seen in the room with her mother was standing before Willow, looking nervous but friendly.



“Hey, don’t want to interrupt. That looks like a quality article.” She smiled, a cute, lopsided smile, and waited hopefully.



“That’s OK. It wasn’t important, just, well, interesting, to see how they structured the story, I mean they talk about her love life, and compare it to her breasts, and I just wondered…wait, why am I telling you this. I mean, you’re all with the sad…are you doing alright?”



Tara, who had tried not to laugh during Willow babble outburst, now looked solemn. “Yes. I wasn’t last night, you know, when you asked me in the bathroom?”



Willow gasped. “That was you? But wait, how did you know it was me, coz you were, y’know, all with the locked-inny.”



“I peeked.”



The two shared a knowing smile.



TBC...

Edited by: vix84 at: 4/10/05 1:09 am


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 Post subject: Re: FIC: The Crying Game (AU)
PostPosted: Wed Aug 14, 2002 9:46 am 
ooh, and they meet :) this is an interesting au you set up here, and a very neat start :D



loved anya eating her cheese sandwich ;)



this is a very interesting start, please continue soon?



steph

"I'm not gay - I'm just Trevor's bitch." - some drunken guy about his sexuality
"Oh, bugger off, you BROLLY!" - Anya to Giles on his use of the english language
"We'll all be a lot happier without the constant whining....Mom, Buffy, Tara, Waah" - DMW to Dawn



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 Post subject: Re: FIC: The Crying Game (AU)
PostPosted: Wed Aug 14, 2002 11:01 am 
:pray "Update soon, update soon, update soon" :pray



JD

"I smell the smelly smell of something that smells smelly!" (SpongeBob Squarepants)



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 Post subject: Re: FIC: The Crying Game (AU)
PostPosted: Wed Aug 14, 2002 1:26 pm 
Good start i is liking it and yeah update doon please!

Willow: Oh, um. Various sounds of hesitation.
Tara: She was just a friend.
Willow: Friends are nice.



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 Post subject: Re: FIC: The Crying Game (AU)
PostPosted: Wed Aug 14, 2002 1:54 pm 
Aww this is sweet! I really Loved the start! And I too say Yes to an update soon, Please!! :grin

"Don't warn the tadpoles!...
I-I have frog fear."



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 Post subject: Re: FIC: The Crying Game (AU)
PostPosted: Wed Aug 14, 2002 2:06 pm 
Vix84: Very interesting fic, I really like the way that they meet, very funny about Xander pleasuring himself in Buffy's bathroom, LOL. Like everybody else I hope you update soon. I can't wait to read more.



Lonewolf



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 Post subject: Re: FIC: The Crying Game (AU)
PostPosted: Wed Aug 14, 2002 2:38 pm 
AU yes! For a second I was concerned given the title of this story, all I could think of was the movie. This is def. interesting, and xander's a bad bad boy.





- - - - - - - - - - - -

Childie -"Not all girls are raving bloody lesbians, you know!"

George - "That's a misfortune of which I am perfectly well aware."

The Killing of Sister George



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 Post subject: Re: FIC: The Crying Game (AU)
PostPosted: Wed Aug 14, 2002 5:26 pm 
I love it when peeps do AU stories! This is so cool :) Your Anya is neat. i hope you include her often.



-Will

"Hear that baby? You're my always."

"well, you know, when you play a lesbian witch you've gotta get killed in this fun kind of exciting way, so the heart was the way to go..."

"we have the most amazing fans though they LOVE us."




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 Post subject: update coming
PostPosted: Thu Aug 15, 2002 3:59 am 
hey all, thanks for the feedback, and you get your wish for an update...



loco2: yes, the idea of Anya and her (skeezy) cheeses sandwich is easy to picture, huh?



jdcioffi: here you go, an update just for you!



umadamber: thanks for reading and replying :)



missquirky: I was determined to have them meet in a random place/situation, hence the hospital.



Lonewolf22: yeah it was fun (and repulsive) to describe xander's little party in the bathroom. glad you..rnjoyed it



Xita: hehe i was wondering who would comment on the title! well there's a reference to the movie in this update, specifically in honour of you!



willntlover: Anya is a muchly fun character to write/describe. thanks for commenting



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 Post subject: update
PostPosted: Thu Aug 15, 2002 4:21 am 
Part Two



Joyce stroked her daughter’s hair, whispering comforting words to the effect of ‘it’s not your fault, dear.’ She cooked chicken soup, made green jelly and cordial, and sung childish songs. Dawn continued to cry.



“I have to go and tell Mrs Jarell about her cat”, she sobbed, horrified at the prospect.



“I’ll come with you honey. You just have to be very calm. We’ll talk to her, and apologize, and maybe you won’t feel so bad.”



The two walked down the street, hand in hand. They knocked on the maroon door and waited patiently. Dawn wiped the tears from her eyes. Eventually, a middle-aged lady opened the door and smiled when she saw who her visitors were. “Come in, I’ve been waiting for you.”





***



“It’s just, I don’t know if he likes me, so I don’t want to be too bold.” Buffy turned to face her best friend, waiting for the usual flow of helpful advice.



“So? What do you think? Umm, hello? Will?”



“Oh sorry, Buff, my mind went somewhere. Yeah, so we were talking about…some guy, err, Daniel?” Willow chose a male name at random, hoping for the slim chance she would be correct.



“Close enough. Wow, you were listening, Will! Just not with both ears.” Buffy, looking satisfied, continued.



Willow’s mind, meanwhile, was far from the world of boy’s names. She couldn’t help thinking about Tara, the girl from the hospital. The two had stayed in the waiting room for at least another hour just talking, about anything from icecream flavours to the unfairness of sickness. And they’d still had plenty more things to discuss, but Tara had had to leave. Willow thought about Tara's departure for a moment, remembering the look the blonde had given her before she ran out into the night.



What was that look, she wondered. It could have been a friendly goodbye glance, a yay-we're-friends-now look or a grateful expression, but something made Willow think it was more than that.



Buffy stamped her foot, coughed, shrieked, and then finally pulled Willow’s hair. She noticed the slightly dazed, almost lovestruck expression on the red-head’s face, but decided to leave that conversation for another day. Willow was obviously incapable of conversation at that point. She wondered who the ‘potential’ could be.



***



Mrs Jarell talked in a soft voice. “Mrs, er, Summers, was it? Could I please talk to your daughter alone?”



Joyce turned to Dawn to check, and when she received a nod, got up to leave with a shrug of her shoulders.



As soon as the door closed behind her, the woman moved closer. “You see, Dawn, you’re not like other girls. You’re quite unique. I knew that, as soon as you moved to Sunnydale. You’ve got power.”



Dawn looked at her, wondering how this related to the dead cat.



“You’ve passed the first test.”



***



“We meet again.”



Willow’s voice, warm and relaxed, caused Tara’s heart to beat much faster than it had been the previous minute. “Do you want to go and have lunch? We can talk some more.”



Tara wanted nothing more than to have lunch with the gorgeous red-head, and answered “I’d love to. I just want to see my mom first. Can we meet later?”



“Anytime.”



***



Xander sat at the table, avoiding eye contact with his girlfriend. She’d asked the dreaded questions - which of the three Summer’s women he had had sex with - and he’d responded a little more angrily than anticipated. Now the kitchen was filled with an angry silence.



“I’m going out now. Bye.” Anya left without a second look.



She caught the bus to the nearest shopping mall, and fished through her wallet for Xander’s credit card. When she found the shiny card, she grinned for the first time that day.



Taking the escalator to the fifth floor, she entered ‘Aurora’s Dress Shop’ and headed for the black sparkly number she’d had her eye on for weeks. She held it up to her body in the mirror, flickered her eyes up and down only twice, then marched over to the counter proudly.



The young sales woman gave Anya an appraising look, then repeated the price, “$1800”. Her voice indicated her feeling of superiority toward the young woman with bleached hair. But she took the credit card and made the purchase.



As Anya left the store, she heard a couple bickering near the sales rack. She gave them a scornful look, then had an idea. She pretended to look at the rack, but listened intently. “You’re a mean man. Why can’t you treat your wife for the first time ever? It would mean so much to me if you bought me a present, or even thought about it, but you just say flat out no. I wish you could know how it feels to really desperately want something, so much that your heart bleeds for it, and never get your desire.”



Anya took a step closer to the couple and said, with a bright smile, “here’s my card. Not a bad wish, Madam, but with my help you’ll do a lot better. Give me a call.”



***



Willow licked the froth from her lips, enjoying the sweetness of the warm milk, as she watched Tara eat her soup. She was mesmerised by it all: the soft, full lips opening, the tiny perfect white teeth underneath, the jaw widening to fit in the spoon and the smooth, sensual tongue checking the soup wasn’t too hot. Tara was well aware of being watched but pretended not to notice. She didn’t want to embarrass Willow, who seemed easily embarrassed. Plus, she was kinda enjoying it.



She found the red-head incredibly attractive but couldn’t make a move. Willow would never know if Tara loved her, or loved the comfort of having someone to hold and kiss when she was upset about her mother’s illness. Also, she didn’t know enough about her to judge if Willow actually liked her, or was just checking her out. A bit of harmless fun. So Tara kept it cool.



But deep down she knew there was definite potential, and this gave her something in her life to actually look forward to. Before meeting Willow, life without her mother loomed like a revolting black pit.



“Umm, Tare, I feel kind of uncomfortable asking you this, but what does your mother have? I mean, I have access to all the files but it doesn’t feel right, I mean now we’re sort of friends. I’d rather know from you.”



“She has breast cancer. They only found it at the end stages when it was, t-t-too late.”



Tara choked on the words. She wasn’t used to talking about it, only thinking about it over and over again in her own mind. “She has less than a month to live.”



A tear ran down her cheek and Willow, without thinking, wiped it away softly, tenderly, with a tissue. She left her hand on Tara’s soft skin, hoping that her warmth and love would make her feel better.



Both of them enjoyed the contact, until Willow thought of something and pulled away.



“God, I’m so sorry, Tara. Here I am, making you eat soup, and taking time away from you two when you could be…”



“No, Will, don’t think that." Tara interrupted the red-head quickly. "I love my time with you. I treasure it. It's what keeps me sane. Otherwise I’d go a bit mad, spending all my time in that depressing hospital. Besides, she's asleep most of the time now from the medication.” She was silent for a moment. “I can hardly bear to think of what she’s going through. I act like I’m the one deserving of hugs, when she’s the one leaving this world, and in such a horrible, painful way.”



She slowly opened Willow’s hand and took the tissue, wiping her eyes and sniffling. “Thanks, Willow, for being here, and talking to me and everything.”



“I’ll always be here.” Willow looked at Tara, noticing the continual flow of tears. She stroked her friend's hand for a minute, letting a comforting silence fall over them. “Tell you what, let's play a game. Umm, the Crying Game.”



Tara looked up, startled. One of her perfect eyebrows arched at Willow in surprise.



“No, not the creepy film. A game just for…us.” She smiled. “Every time you cry from now on, I have to give you a hug.”



“But that’ll just encourage me to cry more”, said Tara, honestly.



“That’s fine with me”, replied Willow with an even bigger smile.



***



Mrs Jarell – who Dawn was now allowed to call Tegan – had been explaining things to Dawn all morning. About the cat, which hadn’t been a real cat but a hologram, and all the other strange things that had been happening in Dawn’s life.



“So, that time in school, where we were singing about math and stuff, didn’t really happen? No wonder everyone thought I was loony, and here I was thinking they were all going denial on me…”



Tegan smiled. “Yes, things do make more sense to the Wanderer once they know about their gift. But as soon as the cat incident occurred, I knew I had to meet you. You see, if you didn’t have the gift, you wouldn’t have seen the cat.”



“Wow, this is so Harry Potter”, said Dawn with a giggle. “So what’s the next test?”



“The next test is the really important one. The magical SATS, in a way. I have a woman, very sick – and this is real, not a hologram – and she’s agreed to be part of the test.” She watched Dawn’s face, as the young girl looked both nervous and a bit disgusted with the idea of using a sick woman for the test. “Dawn, don’t worry, it’s a really nice thing for her. A beautiful thing. I can’t really tell you what it is, but you’ll soon understand why she wanted to do it. And I have faith that you'll do it perfectly.”



Dawn sighed. “OK, so when do I do this bizarre exam?”



***



Anya knew she’d call. They always did. Sure, they’d give her a strange look when they got the card. They’d pretend to rip it up, or leave it behind. But in the end, curiosity – and a need for revenge – always pulled them in.



The phone rang one morning, when Xander had gone to look for a new job. The woman on the other end of the phone was cold, distant at first, yet warmed up quickly. After ten minutes, she was incredibly passionate, revealing all sorts of interesting tidbits about her marriage and libido. “Yeah, would you believe it? He calls me menopausal, when he’s as sexless as a castrated goat!” The two women giggled, and then Anya took over. She began her usual shpiel, stopping occasionally to answer the woman’s questions. Two hours later they’d reached a deal.



“OK I’m really excited about this!” exclaimed Anya. “Rarely do I meet a client so ready, so uninhibited about wanting revenge! Let’s meet tomorrow. I’ll bring all the ingredients, you bring the check. Is that OK, Mrs…wait, I don’t know your name!”



“Oh whoops, sorry about that. It’s Sharon, Sharon Rosenburg.”



Anya calmly hung up the phone, then screamed ‘shit’ as loudly as she could, and went to find the Vengeance Demon’s FAQ. She flicked immediately to the ‘When Vengeance Becomes Personal – Family and Friends’ section and read the words as fast as she could. ‘What the hell is Willow going to think?’ she wondered. She shrugged her shoulders and began to prepare for the spell.

       

***



Dawn arrived at the hospital just on time. She’d told her mother she was doing community service, in retribution for the cat. Her mother was quite confused when Dawn left the house smelling of patchouli and ylang ylang, with silver (magical) glitter on her eyelids. She shrugged it off as teenage experimentation.



Tegan Jarell met Dawn out the front of the hospital, and put her arm around the young girl. She could see how tense she was. “OK Dawn, you’ll begin with a relatively simple exercise.” They walked together to the room and Dawn saw the name on the door “Liz Maclay”.



"Wait, Dawn, I forgot to ask. You don't know this woman in any way do you?"



"No, not that I know of..."



After they were introduced, Dawn was instructed to paint the magical glitter onto Liz’s eyelids, like her own, and put two drops of each oil onto her forehead.



“OK, Dawn, you take her hands in yours.”



Dawn slowly moved her tanned, small hands towards the larger, pale hands.



“Now you shut your eyes and I’ll read the spell for you. Eventually you’ll know it off by heart.



In the eyes of the Wanderer

May memory meet mind

May life be transparent

Onto each kind.”



She lit an incense stick and began to chant Latin words under her breath. She didn’t want to disturb Dawn during her test, but the words needed to be audible.



Images began to fill Dawn’s mind. Slowly at first, then one after the other in quick succession. Some of the images were beautiful, some horrifying painful. All very vivid, intense, and Dawn began to breath loudly and quickly. Tegan was slightly concerned but allowed the spell to continue. Dawn started to speak out loud. Sometimes in sentences, sometimes one off words.



Finally, Tegan blew out the incense and the spell ended. Dawn and Liz’s eyes met. Only they knew those images, those deepest thoughts and feelings. Dawn had experienced each one as though it were her own.



“Well done, Dawn. I can tell that you did brilliantly. Now that you are definitely a Wanderer, I can explain your gift to you.” She began to lead her out of the room, but Dawn lingered for a moment. Then she bent down to the dying woman and kissed her hand.



Edited by: vix84 at: 10/1/02 7:46:43 am


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 Post subject: Re: Part Two
PostPosted: Thu Aug 15, 2002 2:27 pm 
Very good update!! Its interesting that Dawn is this Wanderer thingy, lookin 4ward to hearin more bout that! Did they cure Tara's mom, if thats wut they did then thats just so awesome! YAY!! And i'm glad W/T r gettin closer, their soo cute!! Can't wait 4 ur next update!! :)

"Don't warn the tadpoles!...
I-I have frog fear."



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 Post subject: Re: Part Two
PostPosted: Thu Aug 15, 2002 3:21 pm 
More, more! Shall I ask nicely...



*clears throat*



I would appreciate it very much if you would update this terrific story as soon as huimanly possible. :D



Seriously though, I really like what you've done with the plot and I love the W/T interaction.



Caz





Tara: I got so lost
Willow: I found you... I will always find you



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 Post subject: Re: Part Two
PostPosted: Thu Aug 15, 2002 4:13 pm 
If I cry ... can I get a hug too?



This is such a touching story ... please update soon.



JD

"Was there a voice unkind in the back of your mind saying, "maybe..." (Jeff Buckley - The Last Goodbye)



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 Post subject: Re: Part Two
PostPosted: Fri Aug 16, 2002 1:45 am 
Hmm, an interesting AU you've set up here. Our girls meeting under different circumstances. Dawn as some mysticl wanderer, and Anya's a vengeance demon. Most intriguing.



I really like Willow's crying game!

Adding up the total of a love that's true, multiply life by the power of two
Indigo Girls



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 Post subject: Re: Part Two
PostPosted: Fri Aug 16, 2002 8:57 am 
Quote:
When Vengeance Becomes Personal




LMAO! that's so cool. :lol



how did i miss these last two sections? :spin i hope anya doesn't do anything too horrible...

"I'm not gay - I'm just Trevor's bitch." - some drunken guy about his sexuality
"Oh, bugger off, you BROLLY!" - Anya to Giles on his use of the english language
"We'll all be a lot happier without the constant whining....Mom, Buffy, Tara, Waah" - DMW to Dawn



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 Post subject: Re: Part Two
PostPosted: Fri Aug 16, 2002 12:44 pm 
:) :) :) :) :) :) Great update! Willow and Tara are absolutely adorable, i love how you write them. And what about Dawn? Doesn't she indirectly know Tara's mom? I bet she's going to connect with tara, coz of the memories and all. Thanks for the awesome fic!



-Will



"Hear that baby? You're my always."

"well, you know, when you play a lesbian witch you've gotta get killed in this fun kind of exciting way, so the heart was the way to go..."

"we have the most amazing fans though they LOVE us."




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 Post subject: update...
PostPosted: Fri Aug 16, 2002 6:27 pm 
It's way too early for me to be up (10am Australian time), since I was woken by my little doggie vomiting in my room. *shudder* soooo not a nice way to wake up!!



Miss Quirky - Uh oh, you wanted me to cure Tara's mom? :eek

We'll have to see about that! I had it all planned out, but now I'm not so sure... :confused



Centauri2002 - It was you asking so nicely that got an update! I was so sleepy :yawn but couldn't say no...



jdicioffi - Yeah I suppose you get a hug too. :willow Wait, there's no emoticon for a hug? Will a kiss do? :kiss



Mollyig - Thanks for the comments! I wish I had a Willow too, to give me comfort hugs when I need them. :love



Loco2 - Nahh Anya's way too nice to do anything horrible. IMHO. Now I'll use this space to force you to update your story! :pray



Willntlover - Hey, thanks for the nice comments and the row of smilies! Yup, Dawn's going to know Tara pretty damn well by the end of this fic.



Edited by: vix84 at: 8/28/02 7:34:16 am


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 Post subject: Part Three
PostPosted: Fri Aug 16, 2002 6:35 pm 
Willow and Tara skipped along the path at the back of the hospital. Willow continually watched Tara to see how she was doing. When they’d met up earlier that day, Tara’s eyes were red from crying, so Willow had given her the promised hug. But for now, she seemed to be doing pretty good. She told Willow some of the many stories about her mother as they walked along.



“And I was only three!”



Willow laughed, delighted with the story. “Wow, she’s really into the sexual education, isn’t she?” She giggled, then felt a bit embarrassed when she saw Tara blush. “I mean, not any more, now, since she’s, well, umm, yeah. But, so, want to buy hot chocolate?” She quickly changed the subject as she realised she was making things worse, then felt a shiver run down her body when the blonde placed her hand on Willow’s arm.



“Will, please don’t feel afraid to talk about anything. I mean, I know she’s sick and all, but she’s the exact same person to me that she always is. Say or ask whatever you want.”



For the next half hour, Willow did exactly that. The two chatted about all different things, and Tara seemed ready to talk about anything until Willow said “so what about your love life? It must be hard to have any privacy from a mother with a mischievous mind like Liz’s, she must want to know every detail…”



She trailed off, mentally deleting the words “of your sex life”, when she noticed Tara inhaling sharply.



“Oh, sorry, it’s OK, I shouldn’t be so nosy”, she said apologetically.



“No, it’s funny you ask. It’s just…that’s the one thing I haven’t been honest with my mother about. My love life. I spent hours describing my – well, now former – lover to her. My mother knew everything, Sam’s eye colour, pets’ names, university subjects, and ambitions in life, but I never introduced her to Sam. She begged me to, but I, couldn’t.”



Willow’s eyes never left hers. “Oh, I see”, she said although she didn’t, really.



“You do? Yes, Sam’s a girl.”



“Oh, well, that’s nice.” Willow smiled, then realised she was late for work. “I better run, Tare. Catch you later.” She rushed off without noticing the stricken look on the blonde’s face.



***



Anya checked her outfit for the third time that minute. Small, sophisticated Gucci sunglasses. Hair out, brushed and glossy. A simple black fitted shirt, with expensive blue jeans. And her favourite boots. She nodded at her reflection approvingly. “I would trust you with a gory wish, Anya”, she said aloud.



“Ahn, are you OK? Becoming unglued?”



“Huh?”



“What’s with the talking to your reflection? A worrying sign, psychologists say.” Xander came in looking authoritative, in the middle of pressing his hair down with a clump of cheap gel.



“Ohh I’m just…happy, that’s all.” She smiled, a full, supermodel type smile, and enjoyed seeing the glint of her teeth. Then she applied lipstick, picked up her leather handbag and headed to the door. She stopped when Xander called her name.



“I just wanted to check, that things are OK between us. You know, after the fight yesterday?”



She nodded briskly. She had better things to think about, after all. Such as Willow’s mother’s bank account.



***



Dawn sipped the pale green beverage, trying to hide her disgust. “It’s, umm, real nice”, she informed Tegan.



Tegan laughed. “Don’t lie, Dawnie, it tastes like a sick animal pissed in the cup. And looks like it, too. Come to think of it, it smells like that too!” Her eyes narrowed thoughtfully, “I wonder if…”



She was cut off by a repulsed Dawn. “Please, Tegan, no more guessing where it came from! I just drank it down coz you told me to, so at least pretend it does something good.”



The older woman nodded. “It does, for you at least. The Wanderer. All right, remember what I talked to you about this morning? About leading people on their journeys. You’re a vessel, an instrument of passing on love and truth. You have the opportunity to do wonders for people. The Wanderer is an esteemed, but dangerous job.”



“Dangerous? In what way?”



“Well in the past, well-meaning people have begun to feast on their magical insights. The visions and messages they take from other people, which are supposed to be passed along – a magical inheritance, in a way – they cannot let go of. Soon they become greedy, and…then problems begin.” The lady turned away from Dawn for a minute, and an unreadable look fell over her face.



“But I know that won’t happen to you Dawn. You’re so full of good intentions, and love for the stranger.”



“So that woman, that I ‘read’ today? Who am I passing her messages along to?”



“What you did today was sort of an introduction. Next time, it’ll be a lot stronger. But I’ll help you, and you’ll do a great job. Then after she passes away, you will meet her daughter, Tara.”



***



Buffy and Willow left the cinema with big smiles on their faces. “What a nice ending. If only real life was like that! Hey talking of that, how’d the date go the other night?” asked Willow, looking at her friend curiously. Buffy had not even mentioned if she wanted to see the guy again, whereas she usually liked to tell her best friend every little detail.



“Ohh…” Buffy’s eyes instantly gained a dream-like quality. “He’s perfect. Well almost. The only thing that’s wrong with him is that he’s never home. And he doesn’t really like to talk about himself.” She paused, thinking. “But yeah, I’m sorry that I forgot to tell you about it, I’ve been replaying the night over and over in my head since Thursday.”



She then proceeded to tell the story with her usual vigour. When she finished, she turned to Willow with an appraising look. “So how about you, Will? You’ve been rather cheerful lately. You getting some?”



Willow gave her a surreptitious look. “No. I’ve made a new friend. Her name is Tara, and she’s always at the hospital visiting her mother. We’ve gotten to know each other really well, and it’s great having her to chat to. But on the getting-some front, an emphatic no!”



Buffy looked sympathetic. “Mr Perfect will come along soon, don’t worry.”



The red-head nodded, somewhat distractedly. “Yeah, I guess. Meanwhile, I hope Tara’s OK. I’ve been trying to call her all day now, but she seems all avoidy.”



She paused, thinking about her new friend. “I don’t know what I did…unless, oh no! I'm such a bitch...” She waved goodbye to Buffy and ran off to find Tara.





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 Post subject: Re: Part Three
PostPosted: Fri Aug 16, 2002 7:00 pm 
i hope she realised what upset Tara. Another great update :) I'll just sit back and wait for the next. ::whispers:: please let it be soon!



-Will

"Hear that baby? You're my always."

"well, you know, when you play a lesbian witch you've gotta get killed in this fun kind of exciting way, so the heart was the way to go..."

"we have the most amazing fans though they LOVE us."




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 Post subject: Re: Part Three
PostPosted: Fri Aug 16, 2002 7:17 pm 
I'm soo glad Will is going to go find Tara!! She did act kinda weird when Tara told Will bout Sam! And now Willow is finally noticing her screw up, took her long enough!! But they need to have a chat! Can't wait 4 more! :)

"Don't warn the tadpoles!...
I-I have frog fear."



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 Post subject: Re: Part Three
PostPosted: Fri Aug 16, 2002 7:54 pm 
Aww, poor Tara! I know if I came out to my friend and she ran away, I'd be a bit avoidy too. Glad to see Will's on her way ...



Looking forward to more ... as usual. JD



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 Post subject: Re: Part Three
PostPosted: Fri Aug 16, 2002 8:14 pm 
oh very good. i like the whole dawn storyline aswell, i usually dont like her character but i think that she is searving a better perpose in this fic, shes not just the whiney little teenager.



hope that willow and tara sort things out! i relaly feel for tara, i know its like to have to visst someone you lve knowing that they dont have long left and are in pain, but having willow ill make it so much easier.



more soon please.



xxelliexx

**"Damn gayly forward!"** Anya- into the woods by blameburner.



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 Post subject: Part Four
PostPosted: Sun Aug 18, 2002 5:42 am 
Since you've all been good little kittens (and I'm avoiding uni work), you get an update.



PART FOUR



“Hi Dawn.”



Liz sat up in her bed and smiled fondly at the young girl. Dawn had come alone for the first time; Tegan finally felt that after all their training she was ready to try the spell on her own.



“Hi Liz. How you doing today?”



“Actually, I do feel better. Not so sleepy, which is good. Listen, I thought we could try something different today. When you do my reading.”



Dawn looked worried. “Uh Liz, it’s great that you have confidence in me, but I don’t know if I have enough confidence in me! What if I stuff up? I mean, I’ve only done this five times with you, and that’s following the proper way that Tegan taught me.”



“You’ll do great. What I have in mind today isn’t that different to normal. I want to begin by talking to you about my daughter, Tara. She’s the person that you’ll be passing along my messages to, when I’m gone. Tara and I have a really special, almost spiritual connection.” The woman paused, thinking. “And that connection goes so far that I’m worried about how she’ll cope when I’m gone. I don’t want to sound cliché, but it’ll literally be like a part of her is gone. You see, Tara is a practising witch, as am I. And we’ve on occasion shared our powers. I don’t know what’ll happen when I leave this plane. So I’m hoping that when you pass on my messages, it’ll sort of…compensate for what she’s lost. Then she'll pass along, to her father and brother, what she feels necessary.”



The young girl nodded thoughtfully, thinking about whether her power as the Wanderer would be strong enough to substitute Liz’s physical presence. “OK, so what then? After you tell me a bit about Tara, what will we do that’s so different?”



“I want you to go inside Tara’s mind.”



***



The woman’s outfit, purse and shoes reminded Anya of something that George’s mother, from Seinfeld, would wear. She wore large green and gold earrings, a green woollen vest over a gold blouse, with black three-quarter pants. Anya tried to keep a straight face, as she wondered why the hell an old woman would wear three-quarter pants.



Ignoring the pale calves, she nodded enthusiastically at the woman. “It’s lovely to meet you properly, Mrs Rosenburg.”



“Please, call me Sylvester.”



“Uhh, OK, Sylvester.” Anya almost choked on the name.



“Yes, it’s not my name, but it gives me more of a sense of mystery, don’t you think?”



“Riiiight…” Anya avoided eye contact. “Well, having discussed your husband on the telephone, I made a list of the typical vengeance themes that suit his character. Perhaps you’d like to take a look at them, and see if any appeal.”



Sylvester read the list carefully, occasionally gasping or giggling. Finally she pointed her finger emphatically. “There. That one. Perfect.”



Anya nodded with understanding. “A lovely choice. Now perhaps you’d like to adapt it, make it more personal?”



Anya took Mrs Rosenburg’s wide smile as a yes.



***



Buffy heart raced as she pressed the digits into her cell phone.



“Hey, Buff?”



“Hi…”



“What’s up?”



“Just wanted to know how you were, Don. Haven’t spoken to you since our date.”



Despite his mood, he smiled into the phone. He really liked this girl: her beautiful looks and sense of humour, and particularly her initiative when it came to their relationship. Everyone else he’d dated waited fearfully for him to call, but here she was using the number he gave her. And she was a welcome distraction from the misery of his family life.



“Now that you mention our date, I think it’s time for another.”



“Great. What about dinner at my place, this Saturday night? You can meet some of my friends.”



He thought about it. Wondered what Tara would be doing, and if their father would be OK if left alone for the night. Then he decided he didn’t really care.



“Yeah that sounds great. See you then.” He hung up and began to get dressed to go to the hospital.



***



“Tare, I feel like we haven’t spoken in weeks. What’s going on?” Donnie asked the question a little anxiously, hoping his sister was coping.



She looked up. Two pairs of crystal blue eyes locked together, a mirror of sadness.



“I’m fine, Don. Really.” She stroked his hand. “When did you see Mama last?”



“I was there this morning. She seemed different, lighter somehow…as though some of her worries had been lifted.”



Tara was happy to hear her brother’s news. “Meanwhile, Donnie, how’s dad doing? I saw him last night, but he kinda avoided my attention. I don’t know, maybe you can tell me, but he seems to me on the edge.” Her voice broke. “I’m really scared that he’s not going to s-survive mama’s death. F-fall apart, or something.”



Donnie’s normally calm face displayed anger. “Of course he’ll survive, Tara. He’s a middle-aged man, he can deal.” He opened his wallet and pulled out two dollars for his coffee, which he left on the table. “I’ll see you later. Wait, I won’t. I’ll be at my girlfriend’s house. See ya.”



He left and Tara felt the unmistakable heat of tears rush to her eyes. She put her face down on the table and wept openly.



“Call in the troops! Willow alarm is flashing, sensing Tara tears nearby! Two metres! No weapons, soldiers. Strictly recon.”



Tara lifted her head slowly and smiled when she saw the red-head, who was – of course – babbling. “Hey Will.” She stood up and looked around for a chair, and was suddenly grabbed and pulled into a Willow-hug. She hugged the red-head back for a minute then froze. She’d just remembered the conversation they’d had earlier.



“Listen, we need to talk about what happened before.”



Willow nodded. “Yeah that’s kinda why I came to find you.”



Tara feigned shock, and pouted. “Really? And here I was, naïve little Tara, thinking you came to give me my hug!”



“Well the hug was an extra enticement to come and talk to you. Anyway, what I wanted to say was that…”. She paused. “Can we sit?”



Tara looked a little lost, so Willow took her hand and gently pulled her back into her chair.



“Tara, I’m not freaked about what you told me. About Sam. I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable about anything between us. When I ran off, I actually was late for work, not being all avoidy.” Willow looked deeply into the blond’s eyes. “Then, when I thought about it, I realised how you would have interpreted it. Stupid me, running off like that! I bet that’s not the usual reaction you get when you…come out. I bet other people are all supportive, ‘Tare, you can tell me anything’, and I wish I’d said that kind of thing. Instead I run away! Clever Willow.” She pouted. “And I didn’t want you to interpret it the way I suddenly interpreted it, because that would be misinterpreting! And now I’m out of breath.”



“Sweetie, it’s not your fault. See, if I was totally comfortable with myself I wouldn’t have had any problems. No matter how you took what I said. But I’ve obviously got issues to deal with. And I’m not used to telling people about Sam. I have no other ‘coming out’ experiences to compare ours to. Will, you’re the first person I’ve ever told.” Tara hoped Willow understood the immense significance of this fact.



Willow did. And she thought about it continuously from that point on.



***



“Mmm, nothin’ yummier than this.” Buffy nodded her head towards the enormous pile of food. “Sushi, homemade vegetarian lasagne, and a big, fat moist chocolate cake. “Strange combo, but damn good.”



Willow nodded contently. Xander cut himself a large slice of cake and put the entire piece in his mouth.



“Umm guys?” Buffy cleared her throat, as though preparing for an important proclamation. “I’ve kinda got a favour to ask. It’s very last minute. I invited my boyfr…this guy I like, over for dinner, to meet my friends. And I sorta forgot the friend part. So would you maybe come over? At about 8:30? There’ll be Chinese takeaway! Lots!”



Willow and Xander exchanged a smile. They both loved Buffy’s disorganisation, and her tendency to freak out last minute.



“Yeah we’ll be there”, they said simultaneously.



“Great. Xand, bring Anya. The more the merrier. My mom orders heaps!” Buffy realised she’d forgotten about Willow’s latest crush. “Oh and Will, bring…you know who.” She winked.



Edited by: vix84 at: 8/18/02 5:18:22 am


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 Post subject: Re: Part Four
PostPosted: Sun Aug 18, 2002 5:57 am 
I was about to comment that this really is an aulternative universe as donnie isn't such a tosser...but...nope, he's stilll a tosser.

"Vampires... Always thinking with your teeth..."
~Anya: Doppelgängland



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 Post subject: Re: Part Four
PostPosted: Sun Aug 18, 2002 6:17 am 
yeah - i'm also getting the tosser vibe.



very curious as to whether willow will bring tara, though...

"I'm not gay - I'm just Trevor's bitch." - some drunken guy about his sexuality
"Oh, bugger off, you BROLLY!" - Anya to Giles on his use of the english language
"We'll all be a lot happier without the constant whining....Mom, Buffy, Tara, Waah" - DMW to Dawn



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 Post subject: Re: Part Four
PostPosted: Sun Aug 18, 2002 9:24 am 
Wills bringin Tara RIGHT!?! She just has too! Loved the update, can't wait 4 more!! :)

"Don't warn the tadpoles!...
I-I have frog fear."



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 Post subject: Re: Part Four
PostPosted: Sun Aug 18, 2002 10:31 am 
heya,



like the update and will willow bring tara to the dinner :D hehe. i like all the relationships you've got in this fic, there different and interested and i like them :D .



more soon please!



xxelliexx

**"Damn gayly forward!"** Anya- into the woods by blameburner.



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 Post subject: Re: Part Four
PostPosted: Sun Aug 18, 2002 12:48 pm 
Oh I am really enjoying this fic. Love the updates! I am curious to see what is going on with Anya and Mrs. Rosenb erg. Curious to see how that gets put together. And will Willow bring Tara? Oooh, I hope so. Btw, I like the crying game, many many hugs :)

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Childie -"Not all girls are raving bloody lesbians, you know!"

George - "That's a misfortune of which I am perfectly well aware."

The Killing of Sister George



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 Post subject: Re: Part Four
PostPosted: Mon Aug 19, 2002 1:21 am 
The trust growing between Willow and Tara. Nice twist to have Buffy dating Donnie.

Adding up the total of a love that's true, multiply life by the power of two
Indigo Girls



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 Post subject: Re: Part Four
PostPosted: Mon Aug 19, 2002 6:52 am 
So many people are connected in this fic one way or the other and they don't even know it....kinda like a Seinfeld episode :grin I'm really enjoying this story a lot....how sweet of Willow to give hugs to Tara whenever she's feeling sad. :D



--Michelle



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