Ok- here is the next part. Technically Chapter 4, since the last post was supposed to be a short prelude to Chapter 4. So Here we go - ENJOY!!
• Title of the story: Guardians of Light
• Author name or Pseudonym: Marcenik
• Feedback: Yes, please. This is my first fic so all feedback is appreciated.
• Distribution: Please, just let me know when and where.
• Spoilers: Everything thru end of Season 6. Yes, Tara dies , but in my reality, NOTHING is forever, not even death.
• Rating: Probably PG right now maybe pg-13 later- I am not a smut writer, sorry….I could give it an R for “RAW” angst….
• Pairing: W/T eventually, but there will be major angst getting there
• Disclaimer: ALL CHARACTERS FROM BVTS BELONG TO M.E., UPN AND JOSS, I AM JUST BORROWING THEM THRU MY IMAGINATION. Also, I will be borrowing some words and phrases from the literary works of Mercedes Lackey, mostly because when I began writing this in my head, some terms from her work seemed to fit with W/T's love and connection.
• Summary: Willow still dealing with grief over Tara, We have met the Guardian and are learning more about her. This chapter, Jessies story, and Buffy and Anya find out Jessies secret.
Did I say this chapter would be lighter than the last ones…I may have not been telling the truth…sorry.
• Note: This is my first Fic attempt, and aside from creative writing classes in college, I have never written any stories for public consumption. I am a singer/ songwriter by trade, and any songs that appear in this fic were written by, and are owned by me, and are Copywritten as such. I have a CD coming out this Fall so you can e-mail me if you want one.
The real Chapter 4- Common Bonds
Willow sat at a table at the Espresso Pump, textbooks open, studying furiously for her exams. Classes had been difficult this year, even for a brain like hers. She had to take the first semester off when she went to England with Giles to get better. But she really wasn’t better was she. She struggled through her studies. Still getting straight A’s of course, but it wasn’t easy. Concentrating on anything these days wasn’t easy at all. And as the days pressed on, and it got closer to the actual date, it became increasingly difficult.
‘Day 362.’ She thought, ‘and my heart loses another piece each day.’
She couldn’t believe it had been almost a year since Tara was ripped from her life. She felt somehow, that it was her fault. That it was her price for her magic addiction. Her price for bringing Buffy back. A life for a life. And then her spiral down. She called on the darkness so easily when Tara was killed. Ironic, as Tara was all about the light. Tara hated the dark magic, hated what it did to her Willow. She had lost Tara for a while because of it. But she needed Tara so much more than the magic. Tara was the most essential part of her. Now she felt….empty. Empty and guilty. Willow knew she has lost hope. She knew that she betrayed her love. Her heart sank.
‘If I only had another chance to…..’ her thoughts were interrupted by the feeling of someone behind her.
“ Hi! Willow, right?”
The redhead turned to see Jessie, the singer from the band at the Bronze, smiling at her.
“Oh, hi…yeah, Willow? Oh, I mean, yeah, my name is Willow. Because that’s what my parents named me when I was born, which is strange, because I’m Jewish and Willow, hmmm, never saw that name in the Old Testament, and…I’m babbling aren’t I?”
Jessie laughed, “ Yeah, only a lot.”
“Oh, sorry.”
“No, don’t be…its….cute.” Jessie said sincerely. “ Can I join you?”
Willow hesitated for a moment, “um…yeah…sure…ok..But I was….”
“Studying, yeah I noticed.” Jessie looked over at Willows notebook. “I didn’t know that they were teaching a class now called ‘I miss Tara,’” she said with a puzzled look.
“Um, well, I….um…hmmm.” Willow stammered.
“Listen, I saw you when I was passing by, and you looked so, I don’t know, sad. And I was just gonna keep on walking, but something told me that maybe ….maybe you might want some one to talk to.” Jessie looked at her with the most honest gray-blue eyes.
Willow looked back at this woman who she hardly knew, and something told her that it was ok. That she would be safe.” I…I don’t know where to start.”
“Well, it’s obvious by the doodling that you lost someone, someone that counted.”
“She was my everything….” Willow started. “She was ….my world.” The tears began to flow as Willow told Jessie everything. She talked of how she and Tara met, their first connection in the laundry room, the late night visits, the spells. Their first kiss. Their first ….everything. She told her about how she lost her because of an addiction, and how they found each other again. And finally, she told her about Tara’s last day with her. Through her sobs she told her how Tara’s light had been violently extinguished by one tiny bullet. She left out the part about tapping into the darkest magics and trying to destroy the world, just saying, “Lets just say, I had a really hard time dealing, I wasn’t quite myself.”
Jessie nodded, as if she understood everything perfectly. “Losing someone you love is never easy Willow. Believe me, I know.”
Willow looked up at the singer, “You mean you…..?”
“Yeah.” Jessie said solemnly. “ A very long time ago.” She hesitated, “Can we get out of here? Take a walk?”
“Sure.” Willow replied, gathering her books and putting them in her backpack.
“Let me carry those for you. After all, I was the one who wanted to walk.” She smiles, a bit guiltily, as she took the back from the redhead and slung it over her shoulder.
They walked in silence for a few moments, when Willow looked over at the woman. “So….are you gonna tell me about it, or am I the only one who gets to be all divulgey with the deep personal info?”
Jessie smiled.” Yeah, its’ just …well, its been a very long time. But in my heart it still feels like yesterday. I’m not sure that ever goes away.”
“I know what you mean. I keep thinking that one day I will wake up and this ache will be gone….that it wont…hurt so much anymore.” Willow said, sadly. “But I’m not sure I want it to go away…and here I am going on about me again. I believe it’s your turn.”
“Kerowyn…..Kerry. That was her name. She was…..beautiful, like heaven. Not that I know what heaven looks like,” she faltered,” but it must be somewhere close to her beauty. I think I was in love with her before I even knew her. We were from different vill…, um….towns. Rival schools and all. Our clans, um, I mean families, didn’t get along, that’s another story in itself.”
“Clans??” Willow said, puzzled.
“Um, yeah, we, my family that is, are Scotch-Irish, some of the old folks still use the old words.”
“Oh….sorry, go on.”
“So anyway, I was out riding my horse one day and I came up over a hill and there she was, bathing in the river. I lost my breath at that moment, and I told myself that if I died then and there, that my life would have been complete because I had seen the true face of love in that river. I knew I was in love the moment my eyes found her. I felt as though I had ALWAYS loved her. I couldn’t explain it, but she knew it too. She looked up from her bath and her eyes locked with mine and the world . just . stopped.”
Willows eyes crinkled for a moment, “Horsies. Nope. Don’t like horsies. All those little party pony nightmares.”
Jessie laughed.”Yeah, Kerry didn’t like them either. In love and all, I still had a hard time convincing her to ride with me on my horse. But she trusted me, completely.”
“Tara wanted me to go riding with her. I would have gone anywhere and done anything with her.”
“Yeah, love makes you do the damndest things. That’s where is gets bad.”
Willow stopped, “Bad?”
“Yeah, really bad.” Jessie took a deep breath, “ Remember how I told you that our families didn’t like each other? Well, it was worse than that. Our families had been enemies for generations. I know it sounds like a Shakespeare play, star crossed lovers and all, but its true. When her brother found out about us, he was, well he was in a rage. Her whole family was, and mine wasn’t much better, so, we ran away. But, eventually, they found us. We were hiding out in a small cave in the cliffs. The climb up was dangerous, but we were both expert climbers. I don’t know how they found us but they were coming, fast. I knew that on the other side of the cliffs there was a river, and if we could only get to it, I knew a guy who had a boat we could use, and we could put more distance between us, we could finally be free. So we climbed. Up and up and up. We were fast, but they were gaining on us. I thought my heart would stop when I heard Kerry cry out, and I watched her lose her grip. She started to fall and I grabbed her arm, trying to pull her up to me and hold on at the same time. I wasn’t…..I wasn’t strong enough…I couldn’t….” Jessie paused, tears flowing, “I felt something in my arm….rip..and I let go….she….I watched her fall…it was like…slow motion. I descended to the ground , trying to reach my fallen angel. By the time I got there her family had gathered her body and taken her away. Her brother was waiting for me. He told me that she was dead, and that I would never see her again. At first my grief was overwhelming, and then it turned into …..something else, something….worse. And I did ….horrible things. I blamed her family for taking her from me. I blamed my family for driving us away. If they could have just accepted it, she would still be alive. And most of all, I blamed myself, for not being able to save her. So I destroyed it all. I called upon rage that I never knew I was capable of, and I destroyed them all. My family, hers, and anyone else who got in the way. And when I was finally finished. When I was finally, and completely all alone, that’s when it hit me.”
Willow looked at her, incredulously, “What??? What hit you?”
“In my attempt at avenging my beloved’s death, I betrayed everything that she stood for. She was the most gentle of souls, and I lashed out with violence. She could never speak a cross word to another, yet I killed. She was the very essence of beauty, and in my rage I became more than ugly. I think, if could have been given another chance, I would do it differently. I would be true to my love, even after death. Because, Willow, the one thing I have learned…is that love…well….it lives on.”
Willow thought about this for a moment. “Yeah…me too. I mean , I know that I might not have been able to save her, to keep her from …you know….dying…but, I feel now, as thought I somehow don’t deserve to feel her love anymore, because of the horrible things I did.”
The air was silent as they stopped at the corner across the street from the Magic Box.
“It’s never too late to have faith. To get your hope back. If you try, if you open yourself up, I know you will feel Tara’s love for you. I know you haven’t allowed yourself that in a very long time.”
“How did you….?” Willow asked.
“I just know. Trust me on this. I know.” The singer put her hand on Willows shoulder. “Have faith in your love Willow. Who knows, you may get that second chance.”
Jessie handed Willow her backpack and turned to go. All Willow could do is watch her walk away as she stood there pouring over what the other woman had said to her. She so wanted to believe in second chances.
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Across the street in the Magic Box, Anya stood by the window and watched the interaction between the two women.
“Does Willow have a new orgasm buddy?” Anya asked.
Buffy, startled awake from her research cum napping. “Huh? What? Anya, what are you talking about?” She walked over to join the vengeance demon at the window.
“Her.” She said as the brown haired woman touched Willow’s shoulder before turning to walk away.
“Oh?” then “OH! No, Anya, that’s Jessie…the singer from the Bronze the other night. I guess Willow must have given her the “tour de Sunnydale”
Anya’s eyes widened as she got a good look at the other woman’s face. “Um, Buffy….we need to talk.”
“Talk about what?”
“ I know her.” Anya said.
“You mean like you know her from the Magic Box? She’s a customer?”
“ No, I’ve known her a little longer than that.”
“How much longer?”
“About a thousand years…” the vengeance demon said, a bit sheepishly.
Buffy looked out the window, suddenly concerned for her friend. “So she’s a demon?”
“No, a demon can be killed. Her kind are immortal. She is a Guardian.”
“Are we talking good guy or bad guy here Anya?” Buffy asked , impatiently.
“That depends on how you look at it.”
“Well,” Buffy said, fully in slayer mode now. “I guess we are just going to have to find out.”
TBC
****Coming soon: Chapter 5 - Buffy confronts the Guardian and Tara gets through to Willow.****
Willow is so heartbreaking! 
I'm curious too about the guardian! Can't wait for more! 
What's up with that Jessie chick? I'm curious!