Actually I should work on another fic but this one just wanted to be written.
Title: Ordinary Life
Author: mirage
Email: miragesdream@gmx.net
Disclaimer: Joss Whedon owns the “Buffy”-characters, you know the ritual
Distribution: You can have it
Feedback? would be nice.
Spoilers: no real spoilers only if you haven’t seen any episode from season 6
Summary: Takes place somewhere before ‘Tabula Rasa’.
The first rays of sun broke through the dark as they made their way back to the Summer’s house. Buffy pulled her jacket closer as the wet, cool morning air hit her skin sending a chilling shiver through her bones. She had fallen back a few steps and watched her friends strolling along. It had been a long night. Or at least she thought so, assuming that they had left early this night and now suddenly the sun was back, taking the world from the dead ones and giving it back to the living. Living humans like the three in front of her.
Having been dead had taken her sense of time away. But at least the birds still knew when to wake up and begin their morning song. And they were really enthusiastic with their duty as they filled the silence with the first songs.
Enthusiastic like her friends. They had insisted on accompaning her. She seldomly slayed alone these days. They were too afraid she might go missing again. Might be dead again. But then she wasn’t really living right now, wasn’t she?
She didn’t even remember how it was to be alive. She only knew that she hadn’t felt the same emptiness before her death.
Or so she hoped. But then she wasn’t even able to feel hope anymore. Even remembering being alive wasn’t easy these days. Her memories of heaven overshadowed her past emotions. She knew how she should feel. Being together with her friends and being alive should make her feel happy. It should but it didn’t.
Once she had felt alive after taking the unlife from vampires. Taking and receiving. Energy was never lost, just transformed. It had given her an extra rush of life. Pure energy rushing through her veins. She missed it. But then missing was another emotion she wasn’t able to feel anymore.
And she missed being close to her friends. How could she miss something she didn’t even remember exactly?
A small sigh escaped her lips as she eyed her friends again. They still felt the rush after the slaying.
Potato chips circled between them as they compared their interpretations of the night. For the fourth time Xander repeated how he killed a vampire. It had been a new one. Still disoriented and too unfocused for the hunt and the real kill. Only a few hours old. But with every time Xander told his triumph it grew, became taller, with more muscles and a dangerous gleam in his feral eyes. In a week his teeth alone would be 6 feet tall.
Willow was proud too. She had killed two vampires at once with one of her spells. Only her audience wasn’t as much interested in the incredencies of the spell as she found appropriate. Even from behind Buffy could see the redhead pout.
Anya wasn’t as much interested in the killing as in the money they didn’t make for rescuing the city from them. Her idea was to take taxes from the citizen for their (and the slayer’s) effort in giving them a safer city. And every night she reminded them of this very important part of the slaying. Her ‘lost money’ and the taxes she would take grew with every killed vampire.
Buffy feared (just another phrase she used were a true feeling should be) for the day Anya would consider to became the next mayor of Sunnydale. One demon or ex-demon mayor in the history of the hellmouth was more than enough.
They hadn’t changed. Still her same old friends. Then why couldn’t she feel the same for them? Because of heaven?
Willow’s giggle stopped her train of thoughts. Obviously Xander had told one of his jokes.
“This is so not funny, Xander Harris.” The redhead proclaimed in mock severity as she smacked his arm.
“Well, I just don’t get the joke.” Anya interjected. “Why would someone do something stupid like this, if he ....” with a look at Willow, she added. “or she could just have sex with the girl?”
Willow rolled her eyes, or at least Buffy assumed that Willow rolled her eyes at Anya. It was her typical answer to one of the ex-demons questions.
“Ahn, it’s the joke.” Xander explained to his girlfriend as she snuggled closer into his arm, their fingers entwined.
“Ohhh.” It looked as if Anya would get the joke but then shook her head. “No, I still don’t get it.”
“Honey,” Xander sighed. “I still love you, nevertheless.” He pecked a kiss at her cheek.
“You love me cause we have great sex.” Anya summed up the most important thing.
Even in the little light of the morning Buffy could see the blush that crept over the boy’s face. “Uhmmm... what have I told you about....” He gulped visibly.
Anya waved her hand dismissively. “Oh, about public sex-discussions. I know, only talkshows are allowed to do it, not me. But we aren’t in public.”
Willow interrupted. “Hello. Public here. I’m so public if it saves me from listening to your sexcapades.”
“Look who’s talking.” Anya’s eyes glowered. “But we have to listen to your spell-talk all the time.”
“Hey, you can’t compare spells with sex.” Willow said, her arms resting on her hips.
“Whom do you try to mislead? I know everything about ‘spells’. I’ve seen enough ‘spells’ in my time as a vengeance demon.” Anya grinned mischievously before she took a potato chip and crunched it.
Xander had grown silent, lost in his pleasant own ‘spell’ world. His mouth was slightly open, a small trickle of drool running down his chin.
Smacks from both sides of his head brought him back painfully.
“Hey!” He screamed out. “Why did you hit me. I didn’t do anything.”
“Shut up, Xander Harris. You had this porn-gaze at your face you’ve always get when watching one of your............” The last part of Anya’s sentence was muffled through Xander’s hand over her mouth. “Private sex-talk, baby. Private, something so not to share with others.”
“Too late for the others.” Willow shuddered. “Thanks for the visuals.”
“Change of subject please.” Xander pleaded with big puppy eyes.
“Right, change.” Anya and Willow nodded. They gazed at each other in search for a new not compromising subject.
“Uhm.”
“Oomph.”
“What’s life for you?” Buffy asked suddenly into the silence, causing the eyes of her friends to turn at her. “Being alive. When do you feel alive?” she answered their questioning eyes.
“Uhm, not being bitten by a vampire.” Xander shrugged his shoulders.
Willow tilted her head, to take a closer look at her friend. Ever since Buffy came back from death the witch would suddenly take on this expression. Like trying to look into the slayer’s soul. The blonde avoided her questioning gaze, afraid Willow might really be able to read her secret.
“Buffy, are you okay?” Willow asked. Her voice thick with concern.
“Sure.” The slayer cleared her throat before she shook her head, to chase away her inner demons. In defense she pushed her hands deeper into her pockets.
“It’s just... a lot of slaying and sometimes on a beautiful day like this after a night full of slaying I’m wondering, what life really is.” A weak smile whooshed over her face and for a second she looked like a lost child. “Call me little philosophical slayer. Too much time spent with Giles I’m afraid.”
“Sex.” Anya stated serious. “Believe the oldest but not oldest looking person here...” There was an extra look at Willow’s direction. “.... Sex. You feel most alive having sex. There’s nothing like this pure energy that rushes through you when you have sex.”
“Leave it to the ex-demon to go straight back to the subject we wanted to avoid.” Willow’s hand shot out in front of her to accentuate her words.
“Then it’s money. If I can’t have sex, I’ll take money.” Anya continued. “Money can buy you everything you need to have a beautiful life.”
“Money?!?” Willow asked in disbelief. “Even you can’t be so dumb.”
“The ‘game of life’ is all about collecting money. Life, money. It’s that simple. They wouldn’t call it ‘game of life’, if it wasn’t true.” Anya explained her simple but striking logic. “But enlighten us Willow. What’s life for you? Doing spells?”
Willow suddenly didn’t show the superiority she had had a second ago any more. The witch dwindled as she lowered her head. A gesture that reminded Buffy of Tara.
“We’re waiting.” Anya remembered the redhead impatiently. “Humor the stupid ex-demon.”
“Yeah, come on Willow. Spill it.” Xander supported his girlfriend, maybe in hope for more visuals about ‘spells’.
“Ordinary life.” Willow answered shyly, her voice nearly inaudible as she gazed at her feet, watching them drawing small circles into the ground.
She took a deep breath before she looked up again, meeting the questioning looks of her friends.
“I didn’t know you liked housekeeping that much.” Xander tried to lighten up the situation. His own face lit up as he had his own version of‘ housekeeping containing a barely clothed female housekeeper.
“No that’s not what I meant.” Willow shook her head frustrated about her inability to find the right words. “Ordinary life with Tara. That’s being alive for me. Sitting next to her on the couch while watching a film, just feeling her close to me. And making breakfast in silence. The same rituals every morning, just to know that she makes me pancakes funny size, while I pour coffee. She likes hers with a lot of milk.” A smile brightened up her face. “Facing each other at the breakfast table. She reads the politics and I get the science part of the newspaper. Everything in perfect silence. Just a small word now and then and the ruslte of the papers when we turn them. It’s..... peaceful. Stops the noise in my head. Yeah..” She grew more content as she nodded. “The daily routines. When I do them together with Tara I’m feeling more alive then ever. Nothing compares to that feeling. Not even slaying. Before Tara I felt alive while slaying. Now the best part about the patrols is to come back to Tara and our life together.”
They had reached the Summer’s house and stopped at the path to the front door. Willow closed her eyes and inhaled deeply. “She’s still up. I can smell the pancakes. After a long patrol like tonight I always get pancakes alarm-clock size.” She smiled.
The front door opened to reveal a sleepy blonde. “Willow?” Tara leaned at the door frame her arms crossed in front of her against the cold air.
“We’re coming.” She answered just loud enough for her girlfriend to hear, before she turned back to her friends. “And coffee with a lot of honey.” She added in a whisper.
“I’ve made coffee for all of you.” A proud smile curled around Willow’s lips as she mouthed ‘told you’.
Then she ran up to her lover who had already opened her arms up to pull the redhead into a loving hug.
In silence the other followed them into the house.
the end.
Well Much Love to all, 
/ Amber 4 Life 