First Fic - Warring Heart (Temporary Title)

[A-Rob]

Well, I was listening to some songs and I suddenly got inspired. Let's see where this will take us. Hey, anyone got good ideas for a title? I'm pretty sucky at it.

Title: Warring Heart (I'm looking for a new one)
Author: A-Rob
Rating: R just to be safe
Disclaimer: I don't own anything remotely like Buffy the Vampire Slayer, but the plot is all mine! The songs I used were Like Toy Soldiers by Eminem and The Blood on My Hands by Morbid Angel.


Chapter 1 – Field of Blood


Step by step, heart to heart, left right left
We all fall down like toy soldiers
Bit by bit, torn apart, we never win
But the battle wages on, for toy soldiers


Scent of blood and sweat.

Swords clashing, warcries, screams of pain.

She tuned it all out, focusing her mind on her opponents. Her sword was an extension of her arm, it slashed, parried and racked across her foe’s chest. He fell. She crouched, reaching for her boot dagger and buried it on another’s throat. He also fell. She was covered and blood and bits of flesh and bone. Hers, her enemies, she couldn’t really tell. Eyes wide with bloodlust, she jumped on another soldier, slicing his head clean off his shoulders.

Death was all around her. She wondered in the back of her mind who was it that she was fighting now. Barbarians, farmers? She’d stopped caring a long time ago. Her life was the battle field. Blood, pain, death. That was her destiny. Her past, present and future. She knew that, so why care?

Her sword buried in a soldier’s gut while her free arm snapped another’s neck. A javelin came for her chest, she caught it in a gauntleted hand. She spun and whacked the offending soldier on the neck with his own weapon. He fell unconscious or dead. Whatever. She parried a sword blow and headbutted her next foe. Her dagger slashed his neck and blood flowed down her arm. She snarled and went on.

What was she fighting for, one might ask. Her people? She had no one, not since her village was raided when she was just a kid. She was the only survivor. The Gods? She didn’t believe in them, not anymore, not in this world that seemed to be so driven by greed and war. Honor? Please. There was no honor in war, no glory. At all. Everyone speaks so highly of the glories of the battle field and in truth there was none. They were all puppets, mere pawns. She held no pride for the blood on her hands. She had so many battle scars, but the ones that hurt the most were those no one could see. Those invisible, almost imperceptible scars on her soul.

Focus.

Find your center.

The outside world is inconsequential. Embrace the nothingness. Become the nothingness. Live as the nothingness lives.

Concentrate, but do not think. Do not think of the lives you’re taking, of the widows and orphans you’re making. Do not think of the families you’re breaking, of the tears that will be shed. Do not think of blood painting the ground. And most of all, do not think of the eternity in Hella's Hall.

She faltered. She was so tired of it all. A sword came for her neck and she almost let it. It would be so easy to end it, to let herself fall. One among many, who would care? She doubted even her brother-in-arms would take notice of her death. In the end instinct won out and her sword blocked the slash. A flick of her wrist and her dagger was lodged in the soldiers heart. He looked almost surprised for a moment. Then he fell. She retrieved her bloody dagger and went on.

She set her sights on another soldier. He looked young. Too young for the battlefield. They always are, came the unbidden thought. His eyes widened when he saw her coming for him. The sword quivered in his hand but he squared his jaw. She wondered what he saw when he looked upon her bloodied figure. Was he praying for his Gods to save him from this beast? Her sword clashed against his, sending it flying. He looked terrified for a second, then resigned. He accepted death.

Suddenly she couldn’t do it. She couldn’t bring up her blade and end the life of this kid. He looked no older than sixteen summers. He was too young to die. Just as she had been. She grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and brought him to her eyelevel.

“Go home, kid. ‘Tis no place for you.” She rasped. He looked about to protest and she growled menacingly at him. “Do it or I will kill you.” He nodded quickly and she threw him to the ground.

She returned her attention to the battle, but out of the corner of her eye she could see him running out of the battle field. No one cared about a kid. Good, he was safe. Maybe she just saved him of becoming her one day. She remembered herself at that same age, picking up a sword to fight for the first time. Her father’s sword. She barely remembered him now, he'd died at her village’s raid. She could only remember his ruggedly handsome face, eyes just like hers. He was a soldier too, a warrior. His sword was the only thing of his she had to remember those old times. The same sword that was now on her hand, dripping with her enemies’ blood.

Another man rushed her with his sword extended and she easily parried the sword thrust with her own, twisting his sword out of his hand with a well practiced flick of her wrist. She smiled coldly as she embedded her sword through the man’s stomach and out his back. She quickly yanked the sword free by placing her foot on the man’s chest and pulling, shoving him backwards as he clutched at his gaping wound. She quickly jumped forward as he fell and buried the sword in his throat, pinning him to the ground.

She thought about her first battle. She survived through sheer dumb luck, she’d been so broken after her first kill. She had nightmares for weeks, but she survived. And she fought other battles, countless battles. Eventually she got used to it. She learned to fight and to stay focused. She learned to be a killer. She knew how her brothers-in-arms thought about her. A dark, un-talkative, un-socialized, insensitive, impossible… what was the word?

For some reason, ‘girl’ didn’t suit her. At all. She was youngest of them, but no one could bring themselves to call her a girl. Not someone with eyes like hers. Eyes that have seem so much, much more than anyone should. But wouldn't they be surprised if they knew everything which goes around in her head? Wouldn't they be surprised if she introduced them to all the emotions she had? Every single one. They thought she was a great warrior because she didn’t feel anything. The thing was, she did feel. She just didn’t let any of it show because that would be a show of weakness. Would make her a target, would make her less… Less what? Gods.

Here she was, a supposedly fearless fighter, indulging in self analysis. The Skull-Splitter, as some of her more brave companions called her in reference of her breaking many opponents’ skull with the pommel of her sword. The others just called her Sunset. She had no idea who invented the nickname, but she never told them her given name, so it stuck. They didn’t know her origins, many thought her a rogue Amazon. She didn’t want any of them remembering her, so she never talked much. This army was just transitory for her. Like all previous others.

She’d been wandering for so long, she didn’t even know where exactly she was. Somewhere in Greece. They thought her a mercenary, maybe she was. She just wandered, fought some battles, received her money and moved on. In truth, she didn’t know what else to do. There wasn’t much a woman could do and every one she met was either a soldier or a wife. And she certainly wasn’t fit to be anyone’s wife. She was challenging Death, waiting for it to catch up with her. She had no purpose, no objective. Maybe she started out wanting to avenge her family, but then everything lost their meaning and she just went through the motions. Once you’ve got blood on your hands there’s no way to wash it out.

She didn’t even enjoy the thrill of battle anymore. She was just so tired of it, but had no way to escape. It was her cycle. There was nothing that could break it. So she waited for death to break her.

Her sword slashed once more, killing one more. Then came the silence. For a whole moment the battle field was eerily silent. And suddenly it wasn’t anymore as her companions broke into cheers. They’d won. Her eyes surveyed the field, taking in the slaughter that was done today. Bodies everywhere, the field was painted red with blood. She looked down at her hands, also bloody. It seemed her life revolved around blood.

[hr]

Several candlemarks later the camp was made, the huge bonfire roasting the hunted boar. The soldiers lunged around it, laughing and boasting stories of their victory. They asked her to join them but, as usual, she didn’t. She was clean, her sword properly sharpened and cleaned up, her light leather armor was once again mended and spotless. She was ready to collect and move on.

A bag of golden coins was tossed at her. The Warlord, Brakkus, if she remember correctly, looked at her through narrowed brown eyes.

“Here you go, paid in full.”

She nodded and tied the pouch to her belt. She turned to go.

“Are you sure you want to go? You could stay with my army?” He offered, like so many others before him.

“I don’t have any business here anymore.” She said without turning around.

“How do I know you’re not going to come back with the Athenian Army behind you?” He asked suspiciously. “I should just kill you now.”

She remained unphased. “They’d kill me just like they’d kill you. Besides,” she rested her hand on the handle of the sword strapped to her back. “I can draw this and kill you faster than you can scream.”

He didn’t answer, but she sensed her point had gotten across. She walked out of his tent, heading for the string of horses tied to a rope line. She went for Raven, her black mare. Deep brown eyes stared at her as she stroked a long nose. Raven was a large, war trained horse but her gentle manner belied her fearsome appearance.

“Hey girl, ready to move on?” Raven snorted and nuzzled her shoulder playfully. “Yeah, me too.”

She secured the saddle, making sure the saddle bags were well tied. Then she cut the rope tying Raven to the string and vaulted herself on top of the tall horse. She grinned slightly, remembering the first time she tried to mount Raven. She was dumped on her back so many times it hurt for days. She patted Raven’s neck and grabbed the reins.

“Let’s go, girl.” She nudged Raven’s flanks with her booted feet and they trotted off without looking back. No one noticed they absence and it was better that way.

She sighed, enjoying the silence for once. The only sounds that filled the air were Raven’s hooves beating on the path. She liked the silence, but also dreaded it. In the silence her mind would run rampant. What was it that they said? Silence is loud when all you hear is your heart. She looked down at her hands, staring at the blood only she could see. It would never come off.


Affliction
Forced unto all
Human Vexation
Transcend with blood on my hands


To Be Continued…

So, what do you think of my sucky attempt at a battle scene? Yikes, I'm not good at this at all. Oh well, I'll keep trying. I like this kind of setting, makes me think 'Xena'. Maybe I'll make this into a crossover. What do you think? *imagining Lucy, Renee, Amber and Aly together*
Eh, right. So, any suggestions for a title? And who can guess who's this warrior that starred the first chapter?

[silentinformer]

Okay I loved this story and you can tell cause for the last few months I have been a lurker even with my favorite stories but I couldn't not respond to this story it is very attention catching a change of pace and I assume this first part focused on Willow it just seemed to fit her more, also the sunrise nickname i thought gave it away. Anyway I hope to see more soon and yes having the four of them together should be very interesting.

Silent

[TemperedCynic]

Realistic, bleak, world-weary and honest. Helluva start!

So this might be a Xena-crossover? Oh hell yeah, bring it on! That would be a first, I think. Looking for more like this.

[wiccanbotanist]

Well first of all I think you calling your battle scene 'sucky' is about as wrong as you could get. I like how it is focused on our warrior, and her own thoughts in the heat of a battle so much going on yet only the space around her is important. As for the movement of the battle, the kills that our warrior inflicts, it is done so with ease...now one may think that the ease is merely out of as you say "sucky" writing, but I'd rather think of it as that is the way it is for the warrior, the battle is nothing, just 'going through the motions' as it were, with such ease that she can contemplate the meaning of it all throughout the battle.

Which lends itself to my favourite quote

Here she was, a supposedly fearless fighter, indulging in self analysis

So, the battle scene, not sucky. You are a good writer, and this being your first fic and all, colour me impressed. Love the setting, I'm huge Mythology and Ancient Greece fan, always enjoyed it, but know well enough that I wouldn't be able to write it very well (so once again, I'm impressed). A crossover would be fun, and maybe it won't even have to be a full crossover, maybe just a guest appearance of Xena and Gab would make for a fun chapter. I have no title suggestions (as of yet) and Sunset = Red = Willow is my guess.

Keep up the good work and I'll be waiting for an update.

-wiccanbotanist

[negraoreo]

WOW... ...that was a great start to a story with great potential. Everything was just so detailed and I felt like I was there with her. Your battle scenes were the exact opposite of 'sucky', they were really very good. I liked them. And the warrior? I'd have to agree with everyone else and say Willow. I mean, sunsets are often red in color and Willow's hair is red so I think it's Willow. It'd be cool too, if you had a crossover with Xena. Keep it up, it's really a good story.

[A-Rob]

Oh, wow, I'm surprised with the response I got. Better than I expected. But then, to follow Xena's motto, 'if you expect the worst, when less happens, you're pleasantly surprised'. Nice, guys, thanks for reviewing my story.

silentinformer: Oh, I delurked you? I'm flattered Aw, shucks, seems everyone caught the Sunset hint, guess I'm not as subtle as I'd like. Oh well. I'm giving a serious thought to this crossover idea, it might spice thing up, don't you think?

TemperedCynic: That pretty much summed it up, yeah. Ya know, that's true, I've never read a BtVS/Xena crossover with W/T as the main pairing. That just sucks. Who knows, maybe a certain Warrior Princess and a young Bard just might make an appearance in future chapters.

wiccanbotanist: Wow, I think you understood it better than I did. The idea was to make Willow (damn, everyone caught that one) detached from the battle, but focused at the same time. Kinda like she was on automatic. the self analysis bit was a modified (and dark) mental babble. I don't think Willow will really babble, but she will be very introspective. Thanks for the pep, I kinda needed that, but I may get a big head if you keep it up. I LOVE to study Mythology, any Mythology, but my favorites are Greek and Norse. They're just so complex, full of mystery. And I'm a huge Xena fan, can you tell?

negraoreo: Thanks, I'm writing more already. Don't you just love warrior stories?

Chapter two is in the making, it will be posted ASAP. Oh, and I edited Chap one to fix some things that would end up making no sense. The Hella's Halls reference is from Norse Mythology, I put it there so it would be clear that Willow is most definitely not Greek. Her looks make her seem Scandinavian, maybe Germanic.

Well, I'm off to write more. Thanks for the feedback all!

[A-Rob]

Yay, I finished this faster than I thought. I think I developed a new way of not getting writer's block: three gallons of hot chocolate and music, preferably rock. It does wonders.
Well, a new character is introduced in this chapter, so things will get a little more interesting as I unfold the mystery that is Willow's personality. Let's hope I don't screw up.
See if ya like it.

Title: Warring Heart (This title is the lamest thing my mind came up with)
Author: A-Rob
Rating: R cuz I still don't think it's mild enough for PG-13
Disclaimers: I do not own BtVS characters, if I did Faith wouldn't have gone psycho, Spike would have his undead ass staked, Angel would have the nice idea to sunbathe and Willow and Tara would live happily ever after with lots of chocolate and whipped cream.
Songs: Evanescence - Field of Innocence
Finger Eleven - Sick of It All


Chapter Two – Meeting a Chance


I still remember the world
From the eyes of a child
Slowly those feelings
Were clouded by what I know now

Where has my heart gone?
An uneven trade for the real world
I want to go back to
Believing in everything and knowing nothing at all


She’d been on the road for less than a candlemark. Normally on these times her mind would wander, but there was something bothering her. A small prickling in her senses. Something she would ignore if she hadn’t just left a Warlord’s campsite. Her hands itched to reach for her boot dagger, but she waited. She was a good hunter, she’d wait for her pray to come to her.

Forcing her stance to remain casual, she guided Raven out of the beaten path and deeper into the forest. It didn’t take long for her to find a small clearing. She swiftly jumped off Raven’s back and pulled her towards a tree. She took her saddle bags and let Raven free to graze, knowing that the smart warhorse could take care of herself. Putting the bags beside a convenient fallen tree trunk, she went to gather firewood.

She could practically feel eyes on her as she bent down. She sensed only one person, whoever they were they were keeping their distance. Observing, but making no move to attack. Surprisingly, she didn’t feel threatened. Her left eyebrow twitched, she was curious. Still, she waited, taking her time with the firewood. Sooner or later they would show themselves.

She put the firewood in a little mount and got her flint and striker from her saddle bag. Soon there was a small fire blazing and she settled herself against the tree trunk, purposefully keeping her back to her watcher. She took her scabbard from her back and drew her sword. It was a simple double-edged long sword. A well handled leather grip, a heavy pommel and a unadorned guard. The fire gleamed off the blade, highlighting the inscription on the fort.

Stolz und Ehre

Pride and honor, her father’s most prized traits. She allowed herself a small smile, vaguely remembering riding on his broad shoulders, pulling on his hair and laughing. Her smile faded as the image of their burning cabin came to mind. His shouts for her to run, her mother’s terrified screams. The smell of blood as the villagers tried to defend themselves. Their small village didn’t survive the raider attack, but she managed to escape. She’d been fourteen winters then. She squeezed her eyes shut, thinking of those seasons of wandering alone with only the clothes on her back and her father’s old sword. She shook her head, unwilling to dwell on those memories.

She took a whetstone from her bag and started sharpening her sword. The sound of the stone running along the metal soothed her nerves. Her keen ears picked up a rustling behind her, but she gave no outward sign of it. She finished sharpening her sword and put the stone away, but kept the blade in hand. She picked a random pebble from the ground and closed her eyes, extending her senses. Her eyes snapped open and she tightened her grip on the sword. She threw the pebble towards the tree line and tensed.

“OW!”

Her eyebrows raised in surprise. That wasn’t what she’d been expecting. She lowered the sword, feeling irritated as the same kid she refused to kill stumbled into the clearing. He followed her. How typical.

“Did you have to do that? It hurt!” he complained, massaging his shoulder.

“What are you doing here?” she growled and stepped forward.

He backtracked and the oversized helmet he was wearing tipped forward onto his eyes. “I… I…”

“Why are you following me, boy?”

“I’m not a boy!”

Her eyebrow lifted at the protest. She studied the gangly kid before her intently. The dirt smudged face, too delicate to be a boy’s. Small hands, baggy clothes hiding developing curves. It was obvious now. In a swift move, she snatched the helmet and watched a long brown ponytail fall from under it.

“What do you want then, girl?”

“My name is Dawn!” she said hotly, forgetting briefly about the deadly sword on the warrior’s hand. “I… wanted to thank you.” she finished meekly, looking down at her scruffy boots.

“What for?”

“You saved my life.”

“No, I didn’t.”

“Well, you didn’t kill me.” Dawn shrugged.

“Which I’m not sure it was such a good idea.” The warrior grumbled, sheathing the sword and putting the scabbard beside the saddle bags. She sat on the log, resting her elbows on her knees.

“So, um, what’s your name?”

The warrior stared at her, pondering what to answer. Dawn squirmed under her intense green eyes. It was as if they saw right through her.

“In your language, it would be Willow.” She finally answered.

“Er, right.” Dawn cleared her throat. “Why- Why did you do it?”

“A battle field is no place for a child.” she said firmly.

Dawn opened her mouth to protest that she wasn’t a child, but a glare from the soldier made her snap her mouth shut.

“What were you doing there anyway?”

“I…” Dawn hesitated. “I wanted to avenge my father’s death. Drakkus killed him and most of my village's men last season.”

A short silence followed.

“That was a very idiotic thing to do.” Willow finally said, acutely aware of how close it was from her own history.

Dawn glared sullenly, but didn’t add anything.

“If it means that much to you, you’re welcome. Now go.”

“Go where?”

“I don’t care, just leave me alone.”

“I don’t have anywhere to go.” Dawn mumbled.

“And what am I supposed to do about it?” Willow raised an eyebrow.

“I- I could stay here?” Dawn offered in a small voice.

“No.” Willow said firmly.

“But-“

“No.” she repeated. “I’m not a babysitter.”

“I’m not a baby!”

“Whatever.” Willow shrugged, she didn’t want this child with her, it was far too dangerous.

“Please! I can- I can help you! I can cook and clean your stuff and-“

“I don’t need a cook and I can clean my things myself.” Willow interrupted Dawn’s desperate rambling.

“I could help you fight, be your sidekick or something!” Dawn deflated then. “But I lost my sword.”

Willow’s eyes hardened. “I don’t need your help and you shouldn’t be anywhere near a sword.”

“Why not?? I want to protect myself!”

“You’re better protected unarmed.” Willow said.

“But-!”

“Shh!” Willow cut her off, her shoulders tensing. Her skin crawled and the hairs on the back of her neck stood on end. Something wasn’t right.

“What-“

“Silence!” Willow whispered harshly. “When I shout I want you to get behind a tree, protect yourself, you hear me?”

Dawn nodded, sensing the seriousness of the situation. She was scared.

Willow slowly walked to her sword, picking it up almost casually. It all happened very fast. Two men jumped into the clearing, swords bared. Willow shouted her warcry and Dawn dived for cover, watching covertly from behind a tree.

Willow ducked under a sword slash and buried his sword quickly into the ribs of her attacker and threw up her left arm to block another sword, wincing as it impacted against her gauntlet. She didn’t miss a beat, kicking out with her left leg and catching the other man on the solar plexus. He backed off, clutching at his torso and she took the chance to recover her sword.

Her eyes were without emotion and alert as she circled her opponent. Anticipating the man's rush, Willow simply spun on one heel and avoided his blade. She ducked the defensive round slash of his sword and slashed his calf. Willow quickly dived out of reach of his sword as he attempted to slam his fist down on the crouched fighter and bring his sword back around and down. She came up behind him and slashed across his lower back with her sword, just where his armor didn’t protect.

He roared and went to his knees, but apparently wasn't going to give up anytime soon. Willow parried a sword swing and danced out the way of a second thrust as he regained his feet. Her opponent pulled out a dagger to compliment his sword and attacked.

Willow kept out of his reach, barely turning his sword strikes aside with her own sword while dancing out of reach of the dagger. The man was breathing heavily and sweating while Willow kept her breathing as normal as possible. The man let his anger give him a flash of energy and charged the smaller woman. She stood her ground until the last moment and dived forward into him, rolling his legs out from under him. As he fell on his face and lost his breath the small woman scrambled out from under his legs and jumped on his back, sword poised over his neck.

“Now,” she growled as the man stilled his movements. “Who send you here?”

“B-Brakkus.”

Willow nodded to herself, she’d suspected that. She raised her sword to strike down on the fallen man’s neck.

“No! Don’t kill him!”

She stopped mid strike and looked up at Dawn, who was staring at her with wide fearful eyes.

Willow’s eyes narrowed. “And why shouldn’t I?”

“Because… Because you’d be no better than him!”

“And who said I am?”

“Please!”

Willow dropped her eyes from the pleading girl to the shaking man under her. She rose to her feet, roughly pulling the man with her.

“Leave the weapons and take that scum with you.” She pointed to the dead man. “You owe your filthy life to that girl.” She threw him towards the corpse, watching dispassionately as he stumbled, clutching at his wounds.

The man did as told and gathered his dead companion.

“And give a message to Brakkus for me. If anyone else attacks me, I’ll come for him and his whole army won’t be able to save him from my blade.” Willow said coldly.

The man nodded and scurried out of the clearing, dragging the body behind him. Willow watched the trail of blood left by the gapping wound her sword left on the dead man’s chest. She stood still for a moment, making sure there was no one else around. There wasn’t. She turned back to the silent Dawn, she knew the girl was fearing what she would do to her.

Willow didn’t say anything, she just got her bedroll from her saddle bag and tossed it to the girl, who caught it by reflex. Dawn looked at it incredulously.

“W-What?”

“You can sleep there.” She pointed to the other side of the campfire.

“You’re letting me sleep here?” Dawn blinked.

Willow just nodded, sighing resignedly.

“Y-You’re not mad?”

“No.” she answered simply, settling herself against the fallen log. “I don’t have anything to eat, you’ll have to wait until breakfast.”

Dawn’s eyes lit up and she jumped into Willow in a spontaneous hug. The warrior stiffened, but didn’t push her away. Dawn pulled away, blushing slightly.

“Sorry.”

“Go to sleep, kid.”

Dawn smiled brightly, extending the bedroll on the ground. She took off her boots and laid down.

“Goodnight Willow.” She said, turning over and closing her eyes.

“‘Night, kid.”

Willow picked up her sword and started to methodically clean it. She looked over at the slumbering Dawn and the tiniest smile curved her lips. Maybe, just maybe she had a chance.


How far down would you fall
If you never came up again
'Cause you're so sick of it all
And you want to change everything
Just how deep would you go
To see through it all?


To Be Continued…


So... Good? No? Title suggestions?
This fic will progress real slow, I'll write almost every single day and there will be very few time jumps, so be warned. Tara will be introduced later, so I'll keep you guessing how it's gonna be for some time. Theories anyone?

[wiccanbotanist]

And here I was just about to head back to bed, and I thought naw I'll check the board one more time. Good for me yay, an update!

I like the introduction of Dawn, and Dawn being in a similiar space as Willow had once been, young and looking for revenge. Only I suspect Willow won't allow Dawn to become a fearless warrior, and Dawn will get to have her childhood (more or less) unlike Willow.

As for theories, I suspect we'll get a bit "wizard of oz"-y and pick up a few more characters along the road. As for which ones, and in what order, and the final destination, that I'm unsure of. The only thing I do know is that Tara will show up, and they will live happily ever after (sorry didn't mean to spoil it for everyone )

As for Warrior Willow, yeah you made it easy enough for us to figure it out, but I like that you never used her name until the second chapter, created a bit of mystery despite the fact that we all knew who it was. I enjoy it when writers do things like that. Which by the way, having Dawn be that 'boy' that she saved was excellent. Plus there is the whole idea where I don't think I'd like Tara to be the fearless warrior, that persona doesn't fit well in my head, and any other fic were she is a 'warrior' she never losses that Tara-ness. And I'm wishing to put that into better words right now but am currently failing to do so.....

And I'm glad to be on your pep squad. Gladly will do it any time. Because you are a good writer, and I like how this is written, and I want to see more, and to make sure that I get more I have to make sure that you know that your stuff wants to be read, so you need to write it. (Did that make any sense?, I think I was verging on Willow-Babble-esque). So what I mean is again nice job with the update and looking forward to more.

-wiccanbotanist

[onelesstraveled]

I love this! Wonderful start to a great story, and I really like the way your words flow so seamlessly and effortlessly. I haven't read Chapter 2 yet (more to read, yay!), but I want to leave feedback before moving on.

I love how you've shown us the carefully suppressed emotions inside Willow's mind. Detached, yet involved, the inner musings compliment the battle scenes very well. This is a very different Willow (I think) from the one we know and love, and I can't wait to figure out more about the mysterious Willow Rosenberg!

I'm not too well-versed in the world of Xena, but you've left me very intrigued. Looking forward to the introduction of the rest of the scoobies!


And here I am back again after reading the second chapter!

Strangely, my first response to this part was "Awww, Willow, you big ole' softy". The introduction of Dawn was brilliant, and her being the "boy" Willow saved in the previous chapter, didn't see that one coming. It seems that their similar backgrounds allowed the warrior to be more open and trusting towards Dawn, I was surprised when she disclosed her real name right away. I think that's the main reason why Willow was willing (whoa, try saying that ten times fast) to keep Dawn around, the parallels between herself and the young girl.

I haven't developed any theories yet, I'll wait for you to give us more clues (how's that as a subtle request for an update ) I'm really sucky with coming up with titles as well, so sorry for not being any help there.

Hot chocolates are the best during the winter months! They warm you right up. I love them even more if they are the key to unblock your muse and give us more wonderful chapters to read

[terra21]

First, I don't think you should change the title. Why? Because it'll confuse me when I'm looking for updates. Second, I think it's a great start. It's kinda like Xena meets Ice Age with a side of Lord of the Rings. Don't ask, I don't understand me either sometimes.

So is Tara gonna be a warrior too or is she gonna be the damsel in distress?

[negraoreo]

So is Tara gonna be a warrior too or is she gonna be the damsel in distress?

Oh! Let her be the damsel in distress!! It'd be so cool to have Willow be saving Tara from something and Tara falling in love with her. I don't think I could see Tara as a warrior, so into it or as violent as Willow. She's much too loving and peaceful for that, I think.

Will any of the other Scoobies be making some appearances later on? And will they all be allies or some be enemies?

Anyways...please update soon, I can't wait to find out what Willow will do with Dawn and where she'll go next.
___________________________________
W: "No dancing naked, huh? *sigh* It just won't be the same."
T: "That's all right, we can save it for later."

[Foomatic]

Your imagery, characterization, and dialogue do not reflect this being your first fic! I kinda get the image of Willow as Achilles in Troy (much sexier than Brad Pitt I might add)

You've got all the components for a great and compelling story. Can't wait to read more!

[A-Rob]

wiccanbotanist: Hello there! Glad you made the time to feedback even though you wanted to sleep.

Only I suspect Willow won't allow Dawn to become a fearless warrior, and Dawn will get to have her childhood (more or less) unlike Willow.

Right you are, Willow will try to maintain Dawn's 'innocence' the best she can. As for Willow's childhood, well, she had a very good one, but it was cut short so violently that she can't bear to remember the good things without the really bad ones interfering. Does that make any sense?

As for theories, I suspect we'll get a bit "wizard of oz"-y and pick up a few more characters along the road.

Maybe, maybe not. I'm still deciding if Dawn will even stay with Willow. Being the badass warrior she is I doubt she'll want a kid tagging along.

The only thing I do know is that Tara will show up, and they will live happily ever after (sorry didn't mean to spoil it for everyone )

Aw, did you have to ruin the ending? Now I'll have to thin of something else!

Which by the way, having Dawn be that 'boy' that she saved was excellent.

I'm going to tell you a secret, I didn't plan to make that 'boy' into Dawn, but the idea hit me and I couldn't just let it go.

Plus there is the whole idea where I don't think I'd like Tara to be the fearless warrior, that persona doesn't fit well in my head, and any other fic were she is a 'warrior' she never losses that Tara-ness. And I'm wishing to put that into better words right now but am currently failing to do so.....

No, I get it. Tara, even with a crappy home life and all that, would never lose her 'light'. I tried to picture Tara as my warrior, but I always imagined her so gentle and caring that it just didn't fit with what I was going for. Willow is more... I don't know, susceptible to darkness? She'd never be evil, don't get me wrong, but I think she has more potential to this kind of dark personality, do you get what I mean?

And I'm glad to be on your pep squad. Gladly will do it any time. Because you are a good writer, and I like how this is written, and I want to see more, and to make sure that I get more I have to make sure that you know that your stuff wants to be read, so you need to write it. (Did that make any sense?, I think I was verging on Willow-Babble-esque). So what I mean is again nice job with the update and looking forward to more.

I just had this vision of mini-skirts and pompoms. Seriously, though, thanks a lot, you have no idea how much it means to me. Things like this that makes me want to keep writing.

onelesstraveled: At this rate I just know I'm going to get a big head.

I love how you've shown us the carefully suppressed emotions inside Willow's mind. Detached, yet involved, the inner musings compliment the battle scenes very well. This is a very different Willow (I think) from the one we know and love, and I can't wait to figure out more about the mysterious Willow Rosenberg!

At first I really didn't know if I expressed my intentions right. I didn't want to make Willow into an unfeeling killer. She kills, but she can't muster enough care for a world that took everything from her. She doesn't enjoy being a warrior, but that's all she ever known and she doesn't believe she can change (at least not yet).

Strangely, my first response to this part was "Awww, Willow, you big ole' softy".

I doubt Willow would appreciate the sentiment, but it's awfully accurate.

The introduction of Dawn was brilliant, and her being the "boy" Willow saved in the previous chapter, didn't see that one coming. It seems that their similar backgrounds allowed the warrior to be more open and trusting towards Dawn, I was surprised when she disclosed her real name right away. I think that's the main reason why Willow was willing (whoa, try saying that ten times fast) to keep Dawn around, the parallels between herself and the young girl.

You know, I didn't see that one coming either. The 'boy' was there just to show that Willow is starting to change her ways, but the idea to make 'him' a real part of the story just hit me like a mack truck. I thought for a long time who could be this boy, at first I thought Xander, but he really doesn't fit for what I was looking for. Then came Dawn, the perfect sollution. She's young and impressionable, I think she fit just right in the young-girl-avenging-dead-father thing. As for the reason Willow gave Dawn her real name... She doesn't even know why, it just came out. Dawn has an interesting effect on Willow, as you will soon see.

terra21: I don't know, this title just doesn't do justice to the story, I wanted a better one. Ice Age? As in Disney's Ice Age? Now that's an interesting thought. I really hate The Lord of The Rings, it's too complicated, overly dramatic and Frodo is ridiculous. You won't be seeing any elves here, that I can assure you. I think the background is better compared to Xena and Hercules really, cuz those were my inspirations for the setting.

So is Tara gonna be a warrior too or is she gonna be the damsel in distress?

Who knows? Maybe neither. Tara is still undecided in my head, I have no idea how to introduce her, so it may take a while. But she will show up. Eventually.

negraoreo: Tara won't be a warrior, of that I'm sure, but she may not be a damsel in distress either. I think Tara's character is too deep to be simply labeled like that, so I'm not giving any hints.

Will any of the other Scoobies be making some appearances later on? And will they all be allies or some be enemies?

Maaaaaaaybe. I don't really know if I want to add more Scoobies right now. I think I'll let Willow get used to Dawn first. That is, if she even is going to allow Dawn to stay with her. Guess you all will have to wait and see.

Foomatic: Thanks, glad you like it. I'm just leading you into a false sense of security. This is my first fic, so expect me to mess up a lot.

I kinda get the image of Willow as Achilles in Troy (much sexier than Brad Pitt I might add)

I agree with Willow being way sexier than Brad Pitt, but that Troy movie... *shudders* That was just so wrong in so many ways. Hollywood loves to slaughter Greek Mythology, it seems. First Disney Hercules then this Troy thing. Urgh, it's enough to make me swear off these absurd attempts at retelling myths. Xena and Hercules make up for it, thank God.

I'm writing more and you can expect an update sometime this week. Hope you all keep putting up with me for a while longer.

Rob

[A-Rob]

Boo ya! I finished the third chapter faster than I thought. Nothing really important here, just some Dawn-Willow interaction. Hope you like it.

Title: Warring Heart (up to suggestions)
Author: A-Rob
Rating: G this time, very mild.
Disclaimers: I do not own BtVS characters, if I did Faith wouldn't have gone psycho, Spike would have his undead ass staked, Angel would have the nice idea to sunbathe and Willow and Tara would live happily ever after with lots of chocolate and whipped cream.
Songs: Air Supply - The Eyes of a Child
The Hollies - He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother

Chapter Three - Sharing


When you look to the past for life's long hidden meaning
For the dreams and the plans made in your youth
Does the thrill to achieve match the warm hidden feeling
That lies so still and lives in you


Her eyes slowly opened as the first rays of sunshine hit her face. She blinked. Her back felt stiff and sore. She had fallen asleep sitting against the log. Wonderful. Gingerly, she pulled herself on her feet and stretched. Her spine realigned with a satisfying ‘pop’ and she sighed in relief. Stiffening a yawn, she evaluated the situation. She had a bag of gold, a homeless kid and sore muscles all over. What to do?

Willow glanced over at the slumbering Dawn. A slight snoring sound was coming off her mouth and for some reason that brought a half-smile to Willow’s face. She didn’t understand what was it about that kid. Maybe it was those doe eyes looking at her pleadingly or maybe the similarities of their stories. Probably both, she admitted ruefully.

She recalled last night’s fight and how Dawn had asked her to spare that man’s life. She probably shouldn’t have done it. She knew men like Brakkus didn’t give up that easily, specially when angered. Well, it was done now. What puzzled her was why she had conceded Dawn’s wish, she usually had no problem killing her opponents but something in the girl’s eyes stopped her. She said that if she killed him she would be no better than him. No better than him… Who does this kid think I am? I'm a soldier, a killer, I am no better than that scum.

The warrior sighed. No use dwelling on that now. She frowned. The kid could cause her a lot of trouble. Sighing, she decided she would find her a place to stay as soon as possible. For now though, they had to remain inconspicuous as to not attract unwanted attention. Willow looked down at herself with a self-deprecating smile. Boots, black trousers, a white shirt underneath her chest armor, shin guards and gauntlets. Very subtle.

Shaking her head, Willow went for her bags. With practiced efficiency, she unbuckled her armor and replaced it with a plain brown sleeveless tunic. She took off the shin guards and gauntlets and put on leather bracers instead. Any fool would know right away that she was no villager, but at least now she could blend in a little more. She packed the rest of her stuff and went in search for breakfast.

Willow didn’t have to walk long. She soon spotted a stream not too far from her temporary camp. She knelt down by the margin and splashed her face with the limpid water. It was cold, but it felt wonderful on her skin. She spied a few trouts swimming around. Perfect.

Willow looked down at her distorted reflection. Hair reaching below her shoulders, straight and red like her mother’s. Her father’s eyes, only with much less joy behind them. The pale skin that’s characteristic of her people. Soft features, almost gentle.

I don’t have a warrior’s face, she thought suddenly. Then she looked down at her arms, well muscled and strong. The long, thin scar running almost the whole length of her left forearm. Rough, callous hands that were deceptively small. But that doesn’t really matter, does it? A gentle surface can hide a poisoned pound. Willow shook her head, dispelling this line of thought. It’s too early for this. She walked back to the camp to wake up Dawn.

This proved to be unnecessary, for when Willow arrived at the camp she was greeted by bleary, but definitely awake, blue eyes.

“Morning.” Dawn yawned.

Willow nodded, as if to acknowledge the greeting.

“Come.” she called and started her way back to the stream.

Dawn quickly stumbled after her. She was a little miffed at the warrior’s attitude, but decided that keeping her mouth shut was the best course of action. She did have a big sharp sword after all. And she didn’t want to give Willow a reason to send her away either.

“Go wash yourself.” Willow pointed to the stream and walked back into the woods.

Dawn shrugged to herself and started washing the grit out of her hair and face. Her clothes were also dirty, but she didn’t have anything else to put on, so the battered shirt and pants would stay as they were. As she was wringing her now relatively clean hair, Willow came back carrying a long tree branch. The warrior sat herself against a tree and took a knife out of her boot. Dawn watched interested as Willow started whittling at the end of the branch, shaping it into a sharp point.

“What’s that for?”

“Fishing.” Willow answered without looking up.

“Oh, like a spear?”

“Yes.”

An uncomfortable silence followed. “Er, so, what’s that you’re wearing?”

“Clothes.” Willow smirked mentally, feeling Dawn’s frustration at her one-word answers.

“I can see that.” Dawn huffed. “What I meant is why did you take off your armor?”

“To blend in.” Willow answered simply, putting the now sharpened stick aside and taking off her boots.

“Oh.” Dawn sighed. “You think there will be more guys attacking us like last night?”

“Probably.” Willow rolled up her trousers to her knees and got up, walking into the stream.

“Am… Am I going to cause you trouble?” Dawn asked in a small voice.

“Undoubtedly.” Willow muttered, poising her make-shift spear to strike.

Dawn lowered her head. “Sorry.”

Willow glanced at her. She looked so pitifully sad. Damn, I know I’ll regret this. “Don’t worry about it, kid. It’s nothing I haven’t dealt with before.”

Dawn brightened up a bit. “Really?”

Willow sighed mentally. “Yeah.” she turned her attention back to the stream.

Dawn smiled, watching silently as Willow’s eyes surveyed the water intently. Then, in a swift movement, the redhead warrior threw her arm down and came up with a fish speared through the sharpened branch.

“Wow!” Dawn exclaimed. “Where did you learn that?”

Willow turned her eyes to the excited kid, wondering if she should answer. Why not? “My father taught me when I was ten winters old.”

Dawn grinned at the new information. “Can I try?”

Willow paused, then shrugged. “Alright, I’ll clean this one.” She took the fish and passed the spear to Dawn, who immediately took off her boots and run into the stream.

The warrior chuckled at her enthusiasm and sat down with her knife to clean the fish. She covertly watched Dawn bouncing around the stream, trying to fruitlessly catch a fish.

“Don’t move around so much, you’re scaring off the fish.” she called out before returning to her task.

Dawn followed Willow’s advice and stilled her movements. After several tries, she still couldn’t manage to spear a fish and sighed in frustration. Maybe I'm just not cut out for this fishing thing. She jumped when a hand touched her arm. I didn’t even hear her coming! Blue eyes stared at Willow questioningly.

“You have to calm down, the fish can sense your frustration and they won’t come closer if they feel you’re a threat. Take a deep breath and close your eyes.”

Dawn did as instructed, feeling Willow’s hand over her own holding the spear.

“Now concentrate on the flow of the stream, it’s constant, unchanging. Do you feel it?”

Dawn nodded.

“The fish disturb this pattern, it’s a very small change, but you can feel it. Focus on this.”

Willow let go of her hand and Dawn firmed her grip on the spear. She concentrated, looking for the small changes on the water flow. A few moments passed and then… There! The spear came down, impaling a trout. Dawn brought the spear up and watched with wide eyes as the fish struggled for a second before finally stilling.

“Oh my Gods, it did it!!” she jumped up and down, squealing excitedly.

Willow half-smiled, stepping out of the stream. She didn’t know what possessed her to teach the kid how to fish, but now she was glad she did. At least she can be useful now, she reasoned with herself.

“Come on, let’s clean this one too.”

Dawn practically skipped out of the water, she was so happy at her accomplishment. She sat down beside Willow and offered her the fish.

“No, you do it.” Willow handed Dawn her knife.

Dawn gingerly took the knife, looking at it uncertainly.

“Cut off the head first, then open it here and take out its insides.” Willow instructed with uncharacteristic patience.

In a few moments the fish was clean and they took everything back to the camp. Willow put the fish in a pot she took from her pack and told Dawn to get firewood, since the fire from the previous night was long gone. Soon there was a fire and the fish was cooking along with a bit of water and some herbs Willow had stashed. It would be a good enough stew.

“Thanks for teaching me how to fish.” Dawn broke the silence.

Willow paused on her stirring of the stew. “It was nothing.” She shrugged.

“Of course it was!” Dawn protested. “It was a very nice thing, you didn’t have to do that, but you did.”

“I’m not nice.” Willow growled, not liking where this was going. I’m not growing soft.

Dawn smirked mentally, but decided to change subjects. “Where are we going?”

“I don’t know.” Willow answered truthfully, she really didn’t know. “North, I think.”

“I think there’s a village not far from here, maybe a day’s ride.” Dawn mused.

Willow nodded, handing Dawn a wooden bowl of stew and a spoon. I’ll have to buy more utensils, Willow thought as she ate directly from the pot. And another bedroll.

“You’re not from here, are you? You don’t look Greek to me.”

“I’m not.” Willow agreed, but didn’t offer anymore information.

Dawn took the warrior’s silence for what it was and let it alone. They finished eating and Dawn went to wash the utensils on the stream while Willow packed up. Willow then gave Raven a good brush down, talking softly to the horse.

“This kid is going to get us in trouble, girl.”

Raven snorted, shifting on her hooves.

“And we already get into enough trouble by ourselves, huh?”

“Hey!” Dawn came beside her. “What a beautiful horse, what’s his name?”

“Her name is Raven.”

“Oh. Sorry then.” Dawn smiled sheepishly. “Can I touch her?”

Willow glanced at her for a long moment, never halting her brushing. “Let her smell you first, if she likes you she may let you pet her.”

Dawn looked from the warrior to the horse, then cautiously extended her hand for Raven to smell. Raven stared at her with big brown eyes and sniffed offered hand. Dawn couldn’t help giggling as Raven nuzzled her palm.

“Oh, you’re just a big softy, aren’t you?” Dawn cooed, stroking Raven’s long nose.

Willow rolled her eyes and but the brush back into Raven’s pack. She checked the saddle and the sword firmly strapped to it and nodded to herself.

“Come on.” she took the reins and let Raven’s back to the path.

Willow pulled herself onto Raven’s back and guided her into a slow paced walk. Dawn walked beside the tall horse, occasionally glancing up at Willow. She looked up at the blue sky and started humming an old herding song.

“What is that?” Willow raised both eyebrows.

“It’s a herding song. My dad was a shepherd, he taught me this song when I was little. Want to hear it?”

Willow grunted and Dawn took it as a ‘yes’.

Said the little lamb to the shepherd boy:
Do you hear what I hear?
Do you see what I hear?
Gods, I fear I've gone mad, said the boy
Did I hear a lamb talk?
Did I hear a lamb talk?

The warrior laughed despite herself. Dawn stopped her off-key singing and smiled, somehow she knew that it wasn’t easy to make the redhead woman laugh. Willow shook her head, still chuckling.

“Come here.” Willow extended her hand to Dawn.

Dawn blinked, but grasped the outstretched hand and squealed when she was hauled onto Raven’s back behind Willow.

“What-“

“This way is faster.” Willow said with a shrug.

“Thanks.” Dawn smiled, holding onto Willow’s waist.

“I just don’t want you to slow me down.” Willow said gruffly, but there was an almost imperceptible smile on her lips.


The road is long, with many a winding turn
That leads us to who knows where, who knows where.
It’s a long, long road
From which there is no return
While we’re on the way to there, why not share
And the load doesn’t weigh me down at all


To Be Continued…

Good? No? What do you think? Well, I don't know if I'll be able to write more before the weekend, but I'll try. You may have to wait a bit longer for the next update. Oh yeah, Dawn's 'herding song' is actually a parody of Bing Crosby's "Do You Hear What I Hear". I didn't find a herding song on Google, so I had to improvise.

Rob

[wiccanbotanist]

Right I'm going to skip my usual wordy feedback because it is 3 in the morning here and I need sleep. So....

Nice interaction with Dawn, a very sweet chapter. Can't wait for the next update!

-wiccanbotanist

[negraoreo]

AAAAWWWWW!!! That was so sweet! That whole scene with Willow teaching Dawn how to fish was fabulous. I could easily picture that whole interaction in my mind. Not to mention the part where Willow's riding on Raven and Dawn is singing that herding song, even I had to laugh out loud cause of the lyrics. Dawn is really growing on Willow, I think. And it looks like she'll be sticking around now, what with Willow planning to buy another bed roll and more utensils. YAY!!! I like Dawn in this fic. It's kinda like a big sister-little sister relationship with her and Willow and it's soooo cute.

In other (shorter) words....THIS IS ONE OF THE BEST FRICKIN FICS I'VE READ IN A LONG WHILE!!!!

....and it's only like three chapters long, so far... it could also be because of how Willow is portrayed here or cause I just love any warrior fic starring and , and there aren't enough of those kind either. But now, I'm going to head to bed cause it's really late here and I'm talkin too much due to my being . Keep up the wonderful writing with this great story, I'll be anxiously waiting for more.
C ya!!

[A-Rob]

wiccanbotanist: Well, I must admit that I kinda missed your wordy monologue, but short and sweet works for me too. I really like Dawn as a character, even when she's acting like a bratty teenager. She just grows on you and even badass warrior Willow isn't immune to her endearing charm. Thanks for feedbacking and I hope you have a good night's sleep

negraoreo: It came out better than I hope then. Willow's reluctant acceptance and begrudging liking for Dawn was a matter of some worry for me. I was trying to make Willow a badass with some deep hidden mushy roots.

That whole scene with Willow teaching Dawn how to fish was fabulous. I could easily picture that whole interaction in my mind.

Thanks, I had been wondering what could be a good way to start a bonding section. So I thought something thought fondly about her childhood would work.

Not to mention the part where Willow's riding on Raven and Dawn is singing that herding song, even I had to laugh out loud cause of the lyrics.

The herding song gave me some problems cuz I wanted to put a real herding song, but Google didn't help me any. So went in search of something that remotely resembled one. I just had to tweak it a little to add the comic factor.

Dawn is really growing on Willow, I think.

Like a fungus.

I like Dawn in this fic. It's kinda like a big sister-little sister relationship with her and Willow and it's soooo cute.

If you watch the series you can notice that that's pretty much the way they act around each other. Dawn looks up to Willow, who is kinda a surrogate sister, in some ways even more than Buffy. I wanted to portray this bond, cuz I think this Willow really needs someone to love her unconditionally in this fic. Dawn will soften Will a bit and then there will be Tara.

Thanks so much for the thoughtful feedback, my faithful readers. I'll be writing some more the latest on this weekend. My muse is working overtime so I'm still not out of ideas.

Rob

[Foof]

I've read quite a few AU stories in which these characters exist in a world of warriors, sorceresses, etc. This, happily, is the first fic in which Willow is the warrior and I must say I like this reversal. (I might be speaking out of turn since we haven't met Tara yet and she may well turn out to also be a warrior).

I also happen to be a fan of Xena and find that, when reading the settings and especially the fight scenes, I am brought back to the world where "a land cried out for a hero."

There's a definite Xena - Gabby (non-subtext version) going on here with Willow - Dawn. Dawn's wide-eyed view of Willow is also quite true to the Willow - Dawn friendship of the series -- Dawn was always quie fond of Willow and seemed to look up to her.

I'm quite interested to learn how Tara comes into the story and what the addition of her character into the plot will do to the friendship that may (if Willow lets it) grow between Willow and Dawn.

I'm actually quite verbose. All of the previous simply means, I am enjoying this story very much and look forward to the next update.

[wiccanbotanist]

Now that I'm a bit more awake I'll provide the wordy feedback. We've gotten into quite an interesting Dawn discussion and I'd like to add a few words, inspired by others (in particular Foof) comments and awakeness.

A great scene, Willow teaching Dawn to fish. There is so much this scene says that I'm not even sure I could touch upon it all. Instead I'll just inform you about the two scenes from the series that came to my mind.

The first is when we first see Dawn interact with Willow to which the redhead replies "How's my favorite chess partner, still leading with your knight?" That line in turn spurred my imagination and I saw a scene similar to this one where Willow teaches Dawn chess. Now take from that what you will, but the visual you created in my head was very sweet.

The second idea that inspired me, was

“The fish disturb this pattern, it’s a very small change, but you can feel it. Focus on this.”

Now they never showed Willow teaching Dawn anything about magic, only showed the young girls interest interest in it. Feeling energies, flow...it is the root of magic, the focusing also a big part in magic. Although fishing wouldn't be considered magical by most people (you even been down on the river at night with the moon and stars, crickets and frogs making noises....that is magical), the scene itself shows excellent interaction between the two, something that I believe was implied of 'memory'-Dawn but neglected once she arrived.

As for Dawn happening into your story accidently, I know how that goes, the original plan of your fic takes a slight meander when you get an indea that you can't ignore. I'm glad you took it too, because I'm enjoying Dawn. As for the does she stay or does she go idea.... It would be easy (for you) to drop her off in the next town, make sure she gets herself a nice happy life (which Willow would ensure), and be done with it. It would also be good for Dawn as growing up in that sort of life, and bringing trouble to Willow had many implications. It is Buffy's "I'm being over-protective for you own good" idea because being around monsters all the time is a bad idea. But what is best to protect Dawn, keeping her locked in a tower or letting her learn how to take care of herself? Also I'm curious as Foof, in wondering about the interaction of Tara and Dawn. Though that gets complicated as well because Tara and Willow had a while to adjust before taking on the parental role over Dawn, an obvious and natural role, but I don't see an adjustment period available in this fic. (Again not sure if I explained that right, hope you got what I mean).

And I'll be on your pep squad but there is no way you are getting me into mini-skirt and carrying pom-poms. I think I can get ahold of an old marching band uniform though....or maybe we'll go with some good old fashioned t-shirts. "A-Rob Pep Squad!" We need to pick a color though....

-wiccanbotanist

[A-Rob]

Foof:

I've read quite a few AU stories in which these characters exist in a world of warriors, sorceresses, etc. This, happily, is the first fic in which Willow is the warrior and I must say I like this reversal. (I might be speaking out of turn since we haven't met Tara yet and she may well turn out to also be a warrior).

Yes, I've noticed that too. I've read several of those AU's, but very few make Willow the warrior. I remember reading one where Tara was this shy but kick-ass amazon warrior and Willow was a sorceress, it was pretty cool and Tara's characterization was spot on. She was still shy and kind, I don't think she could ever be a hardened warrior. Willow is more like it, so I put her as my warrior. And no, Tara won't be a warrior, that's already decided. What she will be though... only time will tell.

I also happen to be a fan of Xena and find that, when reading the settings and especially the fight scenes, I am brought back to the world where "a land cried out for a hero."

Oh, excellent! I'm also a Xena fan, but sadly I wasn't able to watch the whole series. I've watched some episodes here and there (downloading or raiding my friends' video collections mostly) so I wasn't sure if I got the setting right.

There's a definite Xena - Gabby (non-subtext version) going on here with Willow - Dawn. Dawn's wide-eyed view of Willow is also quite true to the Willow - Dawn friendship of the series -- Dawn was always quite fond of Willow and seemed to look up to her.

You know, when I started writing the fishing scene I was really inspired by Xena and Gabrielle's early friendship and my greatest fear was that someone would ask about subtext between Will and Dawn. That would be so wrong in so many ways that my poor mind would be scarred for life. Thank God no one did. Willow and Dawn's friendship will be purely based on sisterly love, anything else would be too ew to write.

I'm quite interested to learn how Tara comes into the story and what the addition of her character into the plot will do to the friendship that may (if Willow lets it) grow between Willow and Dawn.

That's the million dollar question. What will happen when Tara comes in. Who knows?

wiccanbotanist: Hello! Good to see you back among the living. Welcome, welcome!

The first is when we first see Dawn interact with Willow to which the redhead replies "How's my favorite chess partner, still leading with your knight?" That line in turn spurred my imagination and I saw a scene similar to this one where Willow teaches Dawn chess. Now take from that what you will, but the visual you created in my head was very sweet.

I remember that one, it really shows the bond that is between them. Dawn looks up to Willow, who in turn thinks of Dawn as her little sister. Someone to teach chess to and explain math problems. It's cute really, in some ways Willow is more like Dawn's big sister than Buffy herself.

Now they never showed Willow teaching Dawn anything about magic, only showed the young girls interest in it. Feeling energies, flow...it is the root of magic, the focusing also a big part in magic. Although fishing wouldn't be considered magical by most people (you even been down on the river at night with the moon and stars, crickets and frogs making noises....that is magical), the scene itself shows excellent interaction between the two, something that I believe was implied of 'memory'-Dawn but neglected once she arrived.

Actually, you're spot on. My fishing scene was inspired by some teaching of 'magic' and tai chi. It's all about energy. In future chapters Willow will teach Dawn more about it, how to feel the flows of energy around you to, for example, anticipate someone approaching. That, of course, needs some more thinking on my part.

It would be easy (for you) to drop her off in the next town, make sure she gets herself a nice happy life (which Willow would ensure), and be done with it. It would also be good for Dawn as growing up in that sort of life, and bringing trouble to Willow had many implications. It is Buffy's "I'm being over-protective for you own good" idea because being around monsters all the time is a bad idea. But what is best to protect Dawn, keeping her locked in a tower or letting her learn how to take care of herself?

It's all about perspective. Willow could ensure Dawn has a happy, relatively normal live by arranging someone to take care of her. Or she could keep Dawn as her traveling companion and show her how to take care of herself. Dawn would gain much more knowledge and life experience with the second option but the first one would be safer. Which to choose will cause some dilemma for both of them as Dawn will fight tooth and nail to stay with Willow. Plus the puppy dog eyes are really effective too.

Though that gets complicated as well because Tara and Willow had a while to adjust before taking on the parental role over Dawn, an obvious and natural role, but I don't see an adjustment period available in this fic.

As you will soon see, Willow won't exactly take a 'parental' whole in Dawn's life. And when Tara comes... Well, let's just say that there will be some friction (and not of the good kind) there.

And I'll be on your pep squad but there is no way you are getting me into mini-skirt and carrying pom-poms.

Aw, there goes my mini-skirt fantasy. You sure you don't want to reconsider?

I think I can get a hold of an old marching band uniform though....or maybe we'll go with some good old fashioned t-shirts. "A-Rob Pep Squad!" We need to pick a color though....

Oh, nice! Can we have a theme song too?

Rob

[Tawilove]

Bravo really it's a wonderful start, I read it all in one gulp

The battle scenes took my breath away, my heart was pounding in my chest, I was stuck in the motion like an invisible bystander, holding on my breath. The way you described the fightings is so realistic and dynamic, really amazing!

She tuned it all out, focusing her mind on her opponents. Her sword was an extension of her arm, it slashed, parried and racked across her foe’s chest. He fell. She crouched, reaching for her boot dagger and buried it on another’s throat. He also fell. She was covered and blood and bits of flesh and bone. Hers, her enemies, she couldn’t really tell. Eyes wide with bloodlust, she jumped on another soldier, slicing his head clean off his shoulders.

You wrote it like a roller coaster but with a great fluidity in the movement that makes it seem so alive.


I like it how you described Willow’s inside turmoil, it’s a very good parallel with the craziness going on around her.

Concentrate, but do not think. Do not think of the lives you’re taking, of the widows and orphans you’re making. Do not think of the families you’re breaking, of the tears that will be shed. Do not think of blood painting the ground. And most of all, do not think of the eternity in Hella's Hall.

This is so touching for it shows how much pain she had to go through to keep in control and for what? She says it herself

What was she fighting for, one might ask. Her people? She had no one, not since her village was raided when she was just a kid. She was the only survivor. The Gods? She didn’t believe in them, not anymore, not in this world that seemed to be so driven by greed and war. Honor? Please. There was no honor in war, no glory. At all.

I love the dichotomy in her, like an impossibility to stop the fight and to go on at the same time!

So I think that’s where Dawn comes along with her vulnerable yet very strong nature, she’s the sign for Willow even if she doesn’t want to admit it yet that she should finally let it go, all her pain all her sacrifices, all her wounds and start living.
Dawn appears to me like the trigger (partly because Willow sees so much of her young innocent self in Dawn), the necessary beginning that is preparing Willow for her real savior : Tara…….sorry I got a little carried away!!

I love the Dawn/Willow interactions

“I could help you fight, be your sidekick or something!” Dawn deflated then. “But I lost my sword.”

This one cracked me up….and at the same time is so moving

“No! Don’t kill him!”
She stopped mid strike and looked up at Dawn, who was staring at her with wide fearful eyes.
Willow’s eyes narrowed. “And why shouldn’t I?”
“Because… Because you’d be no better than him!”
“And who said I am?”
“Please!”
Willow dropped her eyes from the pleading girl to the shaking man under her. She rose to her feet, roughly pulling the man with her.

I think that in those few sentences you managed to synthesize the whole current state of mind of the two of them and the premises of what’s to come.

Willow picked up her sword and started to methodically clean it. She looked over at the slumbering Dawn and the tiniest smile curved her lips. Maybe, just maybe she had a chance.

Not maybe my dear not maybe

Finally the whole fishing « lesson » was a pure moment of a building friendship….at least that’s what saw in it.

It’s a fantastic fic, one going directly on the top of my list cause I’m definitely hooked.
I’ll be waiting very patiently ….as much as Willow could be …..for your next installment.

[sam7777]

I like the idea of Willow and Tara in a Xena-esque universe. Willow as the darker one than Tara certainly makes sense but I don't really see Willow as being that dark (just a dark streak more gray than black). I could never believe Willow as being really evil though certainly angry and hardended to death. The difference between them that I see is a matter of empathy which prevents Tara from being a hardened warrior. Dawn doing the Gabrielle thing is interesting but I'm looking forward to seeing Tara meet Willow without a "chaperone" around, ya know.

[A-Rob]

*singing to the tune of I Feel Pretty*

I feel sleepy
Working sleepy
I'm conceding I'm needing a bed
But they say
Always write your fics, sleepy head!

As you probably have noticed, I seriously need some shut eye (cuz when I start to sing things are really ugly) . But I made an effort to finish the chapter I was writing and here it is. Ain't I such a little responsible writer?

Tawilove: Thanks, dear, I'm glad you liked it. Now I'm the one that can pose as a tomato. I'd give a more throught response, but as of now I can barely think and what I do manage comes out slurred. Sorry about that.

sam7777: Thanks, sam. I really miss Xena, so this is a good way to let out that nostalgic energy, huh? I hope you like the next chapter.

Songs:
System of a Down - Soil
VNV Nation - Fearless

All Disclaimers Apply

Chapter Four - Decisions


Making a decision of death,
While everyone around you pled,
Now you fly in peace,
I hope, my friend,
A man can't avoid what he's meant to do,
When he's meant to do it,
Even if he doesn't really want to,
My memories are of fun and friendship,
Of weakness within the strength of youth,
For reasons undefined, reasons undefined,
Reasons undefined, reasons undefined.


The sun was just setting over the treetops. They had been traveling for several candlemarks and Willow was happy with their pace. Raven didn’t seem even close to tired and she hoped to get to a town before it got too dark. Dawn had fallen asleep sometime ago with her head between Willow’s shoulder blades and the redhead warrior found herself not minding it too much.

That in itself is worrying, she thought to herself. She knew she shouldn’t get attached to the girl, who would probably get over her misplaced hero-worship soon enough. One could only take so much of sleeping on the ground, bugs and bloody fights, after all. And she didn’t want to keep the kid with her, it was too dangerous for both of them. The kid could get one or both of us killed, she reasoned with herself. She will distract me in a fight and I’ll end up with a missing body part. It would really be better if she got herself a nice home in a safe town.

Most importantly, though, was that Willow didn’t want to have Dawn’s death on her conscience. She had already too much blood on her hands without adding the girl’s. And it was bound to happen, of course. She was a warrior, it was her life. She didn’t want that for Dawn, getting caught up in a war once was damn enough in her lifetime.

It was then that her eye caught something on the road ahead. Someone or rather four someones on horseback heading their way. Her senses prickled and her hand went instinctively to the sword strapped to Raven’s saddle.

“Kid, wake up!” she hissed, trying to jostle Dawn from her slumber.

“Huh? Whaa?” Dawn yawned, blinking sleepily.

“Trouble ahead.” She motioned with her head to the approaching riders.

Dawn looked over Willow’s shoulder and frowned. “Trouble? How are they trouble? They look like common travelers to me.”

“They’re not.” Willow said resolutely. “Probably horse thieves.”

“And you would know that, how?” Dawn asked, barely containing her sarcasm.

Willow ignored it. “The horses look well cared for, but their clothes are ragged and worn. They’re carrying swords and riding double. They probably stole those horses from some travelers and they’ll want to steal mine too.”

Dawn raised both eyebrows, impressed. “You saw all that just by looking at them?”

Willow shrugged, not really thinking anything of it.

“Listen carefully, kid.” Willow started seriously. “I’m going to stop Raven and you’re going into the forest, like you need to use the bushes or something. Do not come out, understood?”

Dawn stilled, fear gripping at her. “You’re going to fight… all of them?”

“Yes.” Willow answered simply.

“But… There are four of them!” Dawn protested.

“I’ve had worse odds.” She said noncommittally.

Dawn was incredulous. How can she be so calm about it? She could die! She was about to voice her thoughts when the warrior turned around to face her, eyes hard like the steel of her blade.

“I’ve fought in more battles than you can count, kid. Don’t pretend to know more about the risks than I do. You’re going to do as I said, end of the discussion.”

Dawn lowered her head and nodded quietly. Willow felt a bit bad for her harsh words, but she had to keep Dawn out of the fight and right now they didn’t have time for a sugar coated version. She slowed Raven down and stopped, purposefully not looking at the approaching quartet and she helped Dawn to the ground. The girl looked at her, wanting to say something, but instead shook her head and walked into the forest.

By then the riders were within earshot.

“Greetings!” bellowed one of them.

Willow didn’t answer, keeping her eyes firmly on them as her left hand moved to the dagger on her boot, shifting Raven so they wouldn’t see the movement. They were close now, hands moving to their swords. Willow’s muscles tensed. The four riders were momentarily shocked when one of their companions felt to the ground bleeding profusely, a dagger sticking out of his left shoulder.

Then they reacted. Swords drawn, they jumped from the horses and charged. Willow gripped her own sword and pulled on Raven’s reins. The black horse reared, delivering a crushing kick to one of the thieves’ chest, who fell to the ground trying to bring back the air to his lungs, probably with several broken ribs.

With a wild warcry the redhead jumped from Raven’s back and clashed her sword against another blade in an overhead strike. Her arms vibrated from the impact she was sure the man felt too. But rather than weaken her grip on her sword she tightened it and let the momentum carry her into a sideways slash across the man’s side.

The second man met Willow's boot heel fiercely in the jaw, sending him spinning back. He grunted in pain. Shaking his head to regain his orientation, he lifted his sword and she met it head on. The other man had quickly recovered too and both launched an onslaught against the warrior. She parried and countered each of their blows, keeping her eyes on both of them and never turning her back to either.

A blade came dropping toward her head, but she deftly shifted her head and torso to one side to avoid the blow. At the same time, she reached out with her free hand and grabbed the man's sword arm, using his momentum to pull him toward her. As he came within range, she raised her leg high and kicked him square in the face. Fortunately, her strength was ample enough to topple the large man onto his rear end. While he was confused and disoriented, the pommel of her sword hit the back of his head hard with a distinctive cracking sound.

Not missing a beat, she turned to the remaining thief and faked an overhead strike. As he went for the opening in her torso she twisted and kicked his legs from under him. He tried to kick her at her legs but she avoided it easily. His sword swung at her but it was useless, she blocked it and then delivered a swift kick to his head, knocking him out cold.

“Hey, harlot!”

Willow spun around and saw one of the thieves holding a struggling Dawn. The one Raven had kicked, she recalled. Damn, I thought he was unconscious. He had a knife at the kid’s throat and there was a trickle of blood running from his mouth. Pierced lung, she noted with some satisfaction. Her blood boiled at the sight of Dawn’s terrified eyes.

“Help me!”

Green eyes narrowed. She watched the man’s every move carefully. He was cornered and alone, she knew he would panic at any sudden movements and it was Dawn that would pay.

“Drop the sword, you bitch!” he ordered, his knife almost piercing the skin of Dawn’s neck.

Willow lowered her sword, but didn’t let it go. Her other hand made a sign that was missed by the man, but not by her horse.

“Drop the damn sword!” he yelled.

Raven reared and neighed loudly, her hooves missing his head for a hairsbreadth. The injured thief yelped, instinctively loosening his grip on Dawn, who took the opportunity to wrench herself from his arms. Willow didn’t even blink. The dirk on her bracer came to her hand and a second later the man was on the ground, clutching his throat.

Dawn stared wide eyed at the dying man. She jumped when Willow’s hand touched her shoulder. Her eyes teared up as they met Willow’s. True, she had seen the redhead kill before, but had never been this close to it. Somehow she felt it was her fault the man died.

“I-I’m sorry.” she stammered.

Willow shook her head. “Not your fault.”

“But I should have… should have…”

“There’s nothing you could have done.” Willow took her arm and started leading her back to Raven, who was waiting patiently for her mistress.

Willow took the reins and, motioning for Dawn to follow her, went to the other horses. She grabbed the reins of one of them and turned to the kid.

“Can you get the other?”

Dawn looked at her and nodded, taking a hold of the second horse’s reins. They started walking in the direction the thieves came from.

“What are we going to do with them?” she asked quietly.

“Take them that way, if the owner appears, give them back, if not I’ll just sell them at the next town.” Willow answered with a shrug.

“Are… Are you going to send me away?” Dawn asked in a small voice.

Willow sighed. “I should.”

Dawn lowered her head.

“This life is too dangerous for a kid like you. You saw what I have to face on a daily basis, do you want that for you? Wouldn’t it be better to settle down in a quiet town and lead a safe life?”

Dawn shook her head. “I want to stay with you.”

Willow glared at her. “Do you want an early grave or something??”

Dawn glared right back as her resolve strengthened. “I want to live. In a safe little town I would be just another girl. I’d end up marrying a farmer and being a farmer’s wife with half a dozen of farmer kids.”

“It’s better than ending up with your throat slit.” Willow countered, nodding to the small cut on Dawn’s neck.

“At least I’d have done something. I want to be free, like you.”

“Free?” Willow laughed bitterly. “This is not what I call ‘freedom’, kid. I don’t live, I merely exist. This is not an adventure, little girl. People get hurt, get killed. Do you want to be responsible of someone’s death? Do you want to have blood on your hands? Because, trust me, if you walk my path you will. The blood on my hands will never come off.”

Dawn was silent for a long moment and inwardly Willow sighed, maybe she’d finally managed to push the kid away. She felt strangely sad about it, but it was for the best.

“Maybe…” Dawn started tentatively. “Maybe you null your kills with lives. What if you save people instead of killing them? Like you saved me?”

“And what? Be a hero? I’m no hero, kiddo.”

“You are to me.” Dawn whispered.

Willow recoiled as if from a physical blow, her chest constricted uncomfortably. “You’re crazy, kid, I’m as far from being a hero as I could get.”

Willow almost did something rash when Dawn flung herself at her. Her muscles tensed, her instincts screamed at her to shove the kid away from her. But she forced herself to relax, not accepting Dawn’s hug, but not refusing it either.

“Please, don’t send me away, please.” Dawn murmured against Willow’s shoulder.

Internally, Willow struggled. She had no idea what to do. Pushing Dawn away from her, she was confronted with tearful blue eyes. She sighed, her decision made.

“It’s your choice.”

“W-What?”

“It’s your choice whether to stay or go.” Willow repeated.

Dawn looked at her hopefully. “So I can stay?”

Willow nodded.

“Thank you!” Dawn flung herself at Willow once more and this time the redhead didn’t flinch.

Willow patted Dawn’s back awkwardly. “Alright, kiddo, let’s go.”

Dawn let go and they resumed their walking.

“Can you teach me to defend myself?” Dawn asked a little hesitantly. “Not a sword, just… To be able to handle myself, you know?”

Willow glanced at her sidelong. “Perhaps.”

Dawn grinned. “Thanks.”

“Crazy kid.” Willow shook her head in exasperation, concealing a grin of her own.


So many little things followed me
So many little things that bothered me. But I found my answer.
From all the chaos that followed me I have found my answer.
I've told you before don't follow me because I am not your
answer.

I am not alone, I am not afraid, I am not unhappy.
These are the words I say to myself everyday.
I am not alone, I am not afraid, I am not unhappy.
Tell me what ritual I should have today.
But I'm not alone. I've resolved so many things and set myself free.


To Be Continued…

Sorry if this has tons of grammar mistakes and typos, but I'm barely awake as it is. I'm going to catch some Z's now.

Rob

Edited to correct a few mistakes.

[terra21]

Yep, yep, coming along nicely here. And yes, Disney's Ice Age...doesn't Dawn bear striking charteristic resemblance to the Sloth? Anyway, I'm enjoying this fic and I can't wait until Tara shows up. Whether she is a damnsel in distress or a warrior princess, I don't care just as long as there are W/T smoochies and gay love.

[negraoreo]

Hey...just wanted to say that I loved this last part, especially the fight scenes. They were so detailed and it was like I was seeing it all in my head. Anyways, it was a great update and I can't wait for the next part.

[Foomatic]

Hey, the fight scenes were awesome, very vivid. Your Willow is definitely a bad ass. Great job, and I look forward to more!!

[VixenyTarasHot]

Oh man it's almost 3AM, but I had to stop by and say this story is amazing. I love the bond Willow and Dawn have even so suddenly... and it's good to see Willow isn't completely turned to stone

It just means Tara can come along and soften her up even more and give her some good lovin right?

I can't wait to read more of this. After the wonderful sleep of course.

Ashleigh

[wiccanbotanist]

Wow, look at me and my feedback lateness...looks like if I would have checked it before bed I could have been first again....darn.

Oh well you'll just have to get your feedback now.

So another excellent chapter, and we now know that Dawn is going to stay. I really like that you made it her choice, and that there was a discussion. Willow made it perfectly clear that it was a dangerous life, and heck even happened upon a demonstration for the girl. Which also was another excellent fighting scene. I'm jealous, I don't think I could write those.

loved this by the way

In a safe little town I would be just another girl. I’d end up marrying a farmer and being a farmer’s wife with half a dozen of farmer kids.”

I'm glad Dawn got to voice her opinion and choose....staying of course being her obvious choice.

I'm tempted to quote that entire end dialogue between them because I really enjoyed it. Ah, what the heck....I'll just do some bits.

I don’t live, I merely exist.

I've had days where I've felt like that. Also brings to mind a lyric from Jewel's Deep Water "Your standard of living some how got stuck on survive." I like that song, which the line of "It's nothing without love" will play nicely into the part where Tara and Willow get together! (Darn I'm ruining the ending again aren't I?)

“And what? Be a hero? I’m no hero, kiddo.” “You are to me.” Dawn whispered.

In particular Willow's reaction to it, something emotional being almost more physical to her than actual physical contact, of which her status as a warrior tends to happen frequently.

Also funny that Willow keeps calling her kid. I'm used to the character responding with "I'm not a kid" or "Stop calling me that." I wonder if Dawn either doesn't mind her nickname or perhaps even likes it.

Right so nicely done again and can't wait for the next update!

-wiccanbotanist

[A-Rob]

Ah, now I'm properly rested and not a zombie. Yay for comfy beds and gallons of coffee!

terra21: Hello again! Nice to see you're still with me.

And yes, Disney's Ice Age...doesn't Dawn bear striking charteristic resemblance to the Sloth?

Ohmygod! That visual was priceless!! Gods, how do you come up with these things? Dawn as Cid? That was too funny, maybe I'll right a parody about it or something.

Whether she is a damnsel in distress or a warrior princess, I don't care just as long as there are W/T smoochies and gay love.

Well, smoochies are a given! Of course there will be smoochies, lots and lots of them. But these things take time, it's a long and important process... and I can't just skip it.

negraoreo: Thanks, I try to give as much detail as possible to get my readers into the scene, you know? I just hate those fight scenes that consist of 'and she kicked their asses', that just doesn't cut it.

Foomatic: Don't you just love Willow all large with the butch? I need to find some more fics with Willow being a badass, it's good inspiration. No Evil Willow, that's too much even for me. Suggestions?

VixenyTarasHot: Welcome aboard! And thanks for foregoing your hours of sleep to feedback.

It just means Tara can come along and soften her up even more and give her some good lovin right?

Lovin' is definitely on the horizon for our brave warrior, but it's not gonna be easy. Dawn's helping her mellow a bit, but she's still tough as nails and she ain't letting anyone thing she got soft, that's for sure. Tara will have some work on her hands, but that makes it even more fun (well, at least for me )

wiccanbotanist: Hey there, better late than never.

I really like that you made it her choice, and that there was a discussion. Willow made it perfectly clear that it was a dangerous life, and heck even happened upon a demonstration for the girl.

I think I couldn't have done it any other way. It would be just too OOC for Willow to simply let her stay without trying to give her a scare. Willow is kinda divided, part of her wants Dawn to stay, but the other part wants to leave her in the next town to keep her from harm. Making it her decision was her way of making it clear that she could leave anytime, kinda like it didn't matter to her (even though it does).

Which also was another excellent fighting scene. I'm jealous, I don't think I could write those.

I love fight scenes! Specially sword fight. I have some small knowledge in that area since I took up fencing in High School and now I'm praticing kendo. It gives me a perspective when I write these kind of scenes.

I'm glad Dawn got to voice her opinion and choose....staying of course being her obvious choice.

I think if Willow simply dumped Dawn somewhere she would rebel and follow Willow anyway. That could have been interesting but I decided for another approach. Dawn wants to make a difference and she doesn't think she belongs in a small town living a normal life. Kinda like Gabrielle too.

I've had days where I've felt like that. Also brings to mind a lyric from Jewel's Deep Water "Your standard of living some how got stuck on survive." I like that song, which the line of "It's nothing without love" will play nicely into the part where Tara and Willow get together! (Darn I'm ruining the ending again aren't I?)

I liked that song, maybe I'll use it in a later chapter. And you have a nagging habit of spoiling the ending, maybe you should sit on your hands? *mock glare*

In particular Willow's reaction to it, something emotional being almost more physical to her than actual physical contact, of which her status as a warrior tends to happen frequently.

That's because it's been so long that someone showed Willow any positive emotion that she kinda finds it difficult to deal with, you know? Physical contact for her was mostly in battles (thus the almost throwing Dawn away) and she's not used to PDA's.

Also funny that Willow keeps calling her kid. I'm used to the character responding with "I'm not a kid" or "Stop calling me that." I wonder if Dawn either doesn't mind her nickname or perhaps even likes it.

You know, that just gave me a nice idea for the next chapter. How would you like to see Dawn's POV on the story?

And I'm off to write some more.

Rob

[Tawilove]

Loving it, loving it, loving it!!
Oops you did it again….. you’ve got me speechless with your battles description, so intense so precise. In a lot of other fics I’ve read I never had a better vision of the action unfolding. It’s like a movie to me so visual!

I definitely am addicted to your Dawn and her interactions with Willow, it’s touching in the tender awkwardness that takes place between them.

Dawn had fallen asleep sometime ago with her head between Willow’s shoulder blades and the redhead warrior found herself not minding it too much.
That in itself is worrying, she thought to herself. She knew she shouldn’t get attached to the girl, who would probably get over her misplaced hero-worship soon enough.

This part is cute….and shows that Willow is starting to let go, good point for Dawn!

Her blood boiled at the sight of Dawn’s terrified eyes.

Definitely getting attached to the younger girl there, I think she’s also afraid to keep Dawn with her because she’s sensing that her own instinct of survival is slowly being replaced by an instinct of protection. Hard to deal with all those new feelings.

“At least I’d have done something. I want to be free, like you.”
“Free?” Willow laughed bitterly. “This is not what I call ‘freedom’, kid. I don’t live, I merely exist. This is not an adventure, little girl. People get hurt, get killed. Do you want to be responsible of someone’s death? Do you want to have blood on your hands? Because, trust me, if you walk my path you will. The blood on my hands will never come off.”

Both point of view are understandable! Willow is trying to shield the « kid » from a hard life that is totally « not an adventure » like she said, that’s her protector side and she’s right! But I’d be wanting exactly the same thing as Dawn, and anyway freedom has always a price!

Willow almost did something rash when Dawn flung herself at her. Her muscles tensed, her instincts screamed at her to shove the kid away from her. But she forced herself to relax, not accepting Dawn’s hug, but not refusing it either.
“Please, don’t send me away, please.” Dawn murmured against Willow’s shoulder.
Internally, Willow struggled. She had no idea what to do. Pushing Dawn away from her, she was confronted with tearful blue eyes. She sighed, her decision made.

I love this part, it’s raw, painful and beautiful all into one, so human!
It’s so hard for Willow to accept love, especially when it’s so instinctive and honest, but she’ll make it because she has to ….right?


So again wonderful update, and I sure I'm the latest of the two for the replies....damn RL

Julie