Title:Speaking To Silence
Author: Umgaynow aka Sandi aka That Big Tease...
Spoilers:None really...it takes place AU a year after Seeing Red...and moderators, please don't delete me...Tara turns up eventually...I swear...I promise a happy ending...anyway, aside from using characters and vague references to canon plot incidents, it's all mine
Disclaimer:Mutant Enemy dudes, Even though the characters are yours, the ideas are mine and do you really want to be so petty as to sue over a few characters? Keep in mind I am a single unemployed starving artist type...
Rating: Pretty much G for now...but you know me...it'll be NC-17 (or more) eventually
Pairing: Willow and Tara...eventually...although I refuse to say how eventually
Angst:Hear that tinkling noise? Those are the bells on the angst truck pulling into town...it's going to be making the rounds for a while...I mean, hello...Tara is DEAD when the story starts...but I promise there will be fabulous creamy goodness for all by the end...so pretty please Mistress Moderator...don't erase me!!
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Speaking to Silence: Chapter 1
Tara had been gone for a year...one year exactly, as a matter of fact...but a fact of which Amy Madison was not aware. As she lurked in her usual spot behind the big tree, she watched quite intently while Willow Rosenberg rocked back and forth, saying Kaddish over the grave of her lover. Of course, Amy had no idea of precisely what it was that she was seeing. The only thing the dark-eyed witch knew for sure was that this was something new. In all the months that she had been following Willow, observing Willow, this was the first time that she'd witnessed her performing the ritual and she could not tear her eyes away from it. Truth be told, any change in the unending sameness of the redhead's ordinary routine was cause for excitement. In fact, it was damned near a miracle.
In the beginning there had been the periodic visits from friends...Buffy, of course...her annoying "kid sister"...that geek Harris...even the demon chick who owned The Magic Box...or what was left of it once the Red Witch was through with it anyway...now, no one came. Well, no one who wasn't delivering pizza, groceries or the occasional FedEx package. Amy could only assume that through the passage of time and liberal usage of the hefty weight that was her all-consuming guilt, Willow had finally managed to wear down her friends and push them away.
These days, the redhead spent the bulk of her time in self-imposed isolation. As a techno-geek she could unproblematically work from home and so, found it quite easy to avoid venturing out into the world, where actual human interaction might be required of her. As far as Amy could tell, there were only two reasons why she ever set foot outside her door at all.
The first and most frequent, was to visit Tara's grave, something that she did each and every day without fail. Quite often she would sit and read aloud or talk in her usual animated fashion, as though it was indeed her own very dear departed sitting beside her and not some inert chunk of granite. Then there were the other days...days when she spent hour upon hour silently crying and running her fingers over the grooves where her lover's name had been incised in the stone, until their tips were red and raw.
The only other reason she would deign to leave the house was to attend those stupid Spellcasters Anonymous meetings. Generally she'd go once or maybe twice a week, but every now and then she'd go through a phase where she was doing the Wiccan 12-Step, as the watchful witch liked to call it, every single day. Those were the times that gave Amy hope, the days when she searched oh so carefully for a glimpse of the Red Witch behind those sad, sad green eyes. She just to believe that one day, sooner or later...but preferably sooner...she'd find her there, otherwise she'd...well, she'd just lose it.
It drove her absolutely batshit that mousy little Willow Rosenberg had been gifted with such phenomenal power...power that she wouldn't even use, mind you...and she, the daughter of one of the most powerful witches Sunnydale had ever seen, had to work her ass off to manage even the simplest of spells. Of course, that hadn't always been the case...and that was Rosenberg's fault too.
If the juiced up redhead hadn't sucked him dry, Amy could have gone on getting power boosts from Rack as often as she liked. Well, as often as she was willing to trade kinky sexual favors for spells, at any rate. She fingered the jagged scar on her hip that served as a constant reminder of it, hating the fact that her one chance for any sort of regular fix was now in the hands of the one person she detested most. Well, aside from Cordelia anyway...but everybody hated her.
Still, if she could somehow regain the grieving witch's trust...then maybe...just maybe...she could find a way to leech off some of her power...even if it meant flat out pushing her off the wagon. Mmmmmmmmmm, Rack said she tasted like strawberries...I'm sure that with a little extra work I could still manage that spell that I used for her "birthday present"...and this time she doesn't have her little slayer watchdog to protect her...oh yeah...I can't wait...I've always loved strawberries...
Amy was broken out of her reverie when the sounds of chanting stopped. She smiled as Willow leaned forward and set a small stone on top of her lover's marker, placing a single kiss upon her name.
"Well, that's my cue," Amy snarked to herself, knowing that this act signalled the redhead's imminent departure, "It's showtime..."
TBC? Or is it too sad? Feedback me, kitties!
Umgaynow/Sandi
I like it! Please continue!!! 
Hope she falls flat on her face one of the times she's spying on Willow. 
Or falls down a tree. 
Her isolating herself is understandable after Tara dying, which hopefully they get and therefore are giving her some space. 
)
Oh well...I guess I'll just have to wait and see.
And Amy...well I just want to kick her scrawny ass. OOO you could make her be dead! She could get hit by a truck or something. That would be great! Would serve her right for spying on Willow and plotting to make her all dark and evil again. 
will not be far off.
