Author : Eirn Love
E-Mail : eirn_love@punkass.com
Feedback : PLEASE!
Setting : No one is dead, Tara left Willow, Willow ran away, no one knows where she is. It’s been 4 months. Tara is living with the Scoobies.
Summary : Willow goes down, deep down and Tara pulls her out.
Distribution : Who would want this?
Rating : R, I guess.. I’ll let you know when it’s NC-17.
Couples : Willow and Tara.
Disclaimer : No spoilers, a lot of angst.
Help Me.. – Chapter One
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22.01.1998
Wednesday
Today, is the fourth month I had to go through without Willow. I never wanted lose her. I wanted her to get better. I left her to give her a chance get a grip of her own life, but she totally lost it. Now I know. I made the wrong choice, the one that made no sense, when there was the option of standing beside her, supporting her until everything was okay.
For the two months, I waited, looked for her. She’s not in Sunnydale, nor in LA. If she was around, someone would definitely have heard of her.
Buffy already gave up looking for her. I see her crying in guilt everyday. She says it was her fault, because she wasn’t beside her when Wilow needed her help.
Me? My sorrow is beyond crying. When I cry, it’s blood that comes down from my eyes.
There is only one thing that I’m sure. She’s alive. How do I know? Easy. Because I’m still alive. If she was dead, my heart would have stopped beating.
I’m absolutely sure about it.
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23.01.1998
Thursday
I felt her.
But still, no sign of her, not in my spells, no news from underground. I check for her everyday, in hospital registries. It’s very easy for her to hide from locator spells, we would have heard of her from someone.
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RING-RING
“I’ll get it!” the slayer hurried towards the receiver. “Summers’ house… Yeah..” She frowned. “Okay.. We’ll check..”
Tara looked up.
“It’s Clem. He says someone told him that the felt a power existed once was weakening.”
“Oh my god, that’s her! That’s why I can feel her now! Her glamour spells are weakening!” Tara shouted. She looked up to Buffy.
“Now I can locate her. We have to find her! She’s not okay!”
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Everyone was in Buffy’s house, and Buffy was telling all about it to Xander, Dawn and Anya, while Tara was casting a spell to locate Willow.
“How come Willow got here without we knowing about it? I mean we have Clem, Spike and their friends around to get us information. And a small sized redhead with the powers of a goddess isn’t something unnoticable.” Said Xander. He was at the edge of bursting into tears.
“Don’t know. Tara’s not okay either. She’s locating Willow now.” Buffy replied.
At that moment, Tara rushed down the stairs.
“Get your coats. We’re going. She’s at the docks area.” she said.
“Isn’t it where homeless drug addicts live?” Dawn asked. Tara’s only reply was a look that wouldn’t be expected from her, that made Dawn be quiet.
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When they arrived, Tara was the first one to get off the car.
“Huh! It’s cold out here!” said Xander, when everyone got off the car and started rubbing their hands. That exclamation made Tara shift uncomfortably
“Let’s go, we have to get to her!”
“Tara it’s a huge area, how are we going to find her here, in the middle of the night?” Buffy asked.
“I feel her.” She mumbled. As a reply to Buffy, but more to herself said.Then she ran, obvious that she knew where she was going.
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After a ten minutes of running that felt like an hour, Tara slowed down.
“She’s just around here, but her glamour spell is still working. I can’t fully locate her. We have to do something!” Tara panicked.
Xander looked around to look at the homeless people gathering around a fire in a barrel. He put his hands around his mouth to form a megaphone, and shouted.
“Hey! Look up for a minute!”
I few people looked at him, but turned away shortly. One of them slowly responded.
“What are you people doing here?” he said. Xander walked towards him and told him what they were looking for. The guy stood up and came near the group.
“You’re looking for the redhead?” he asked. Tara nodded quickly.
“Well,” he said, “Jenna is with her. Your girl is not really in a fine condition. Her cabin is very close to here… But, what are you going to do with her?”
Something was happening to Tara. She came along, grabbed the man by the neck, and held him a feet high from ground. Her other hand was covered in green flames, and she was crystal clear.
“Where is Willow?”
“S-She’s i-in the the smallest cabin, The second piling… Please let me down!”
Tara closed her eyes, opened them again. The fire was gone, and the man was on his feet. He ran away instantly.
“Let’s go.”
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When they found the cabin the guy told about, they found another girl sitting in front of the cabin. When they came nearer, they noticed that the girl was asleep. They were about tor rush in, but the girl woke up and asked them what the hell were they doing.
“Who are you?” asked Tara.
“My name’s Jenna, I’m taking care of someone here… Why were you going in? Do you have anything to do with her?” she said.
“We do… We used to, I guess… How’s she?” Tara asked, while the others waited impatiently, wondering why just Tara doesn’t rush in to Willow.
Jenna looked at Tara’s deep blue eyes.
“Not good at all.” Tara winced, Jenna didn’t notice and continued. “She’s ill, we don’t have much food here, nor medicine, she’s exhausted all the time, she can’t get up to walk. She has this same dream everyday, that doesn’t tell it to me, but I guess I know what is it. She holds a paper in her hand, never drops it, never puts it aside, and we tried to pry her hand open to get the blood flowing through her hand, but it’s impossible. I think it’s about her religion or something. Sometimes, when she’s conscious, I see her putting it to her heart and praying to it. She doesn’t pray to a god, she prays at the little paper she holds.” Jenna was quiet for a moment. Then went on.”I don’t know why am I telling you about her, but you have something in your eyes that is just like she has.”
Tara wondered about this piece of paper, knowing that Willow is wiccan, but asked something else.
“What do you think she dreams?”
“It’s easy. She dreams her best friends coming here and picking her up. She hopes for this every moment. I know she’ll never go herself, she’s dying of guilt.” Jenna replied.
All of the Scoobies looked down, terrified. Tara was the one who first recovered from the shock.
“Inside, now.” she ordered. She tried to open the door, but it was locked. Xander came forward, gently pushed Tara aside, and kicked the door down. They hurried in, and gasped in horror at what they saw.
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Edited by: eirnlove
AGHHH. What happened here? I want to know more. How is Willow? What the scoobies will do? Upload soon please. 
oh no...whats happened to our sweet willow?i see that this fic is just as painful as i dont know what.oh god...
oh here we go on an emotional rollercoaster that has no breaks right? okay i changed my mind.i want off this ride.
i think the doctors are still
. I love any story that takes a new direction with the cannon. hopefully we will see more soon. 
