Fic:Early Love

[CEsgirl13]

Title-Early Love

Disclaimer-I do not own any of the Buffy-verse characters but any others, i do own.

summary-Willow and Tara fall in love while Willow is in eight grade and Tara is in 7th. Willow is still brainy, but has a tougher time tapping into her intelligence. It is set in Willow's point of you.

Dedication-to my girlfriend, Callie.



Chapter 1

My heart was beating faster than usual and a full out babble war was raging in my head. I was starting at a new school today, with new people to hate me, new classes and teachers, and I was terrified. The only people I knew were seventh graders, so I wouldn't have any classes with them which terrified me even further. I had no one to hang with during classes, so I would seem like such a newbie.



After rummaging through my drawers for the fiftieth time, I finally decided that what I was wearing was going to do, unless I wanted to be late. Grabbing my light bookbag, I flew down the hall and down the stairs and to the car.



As we pulled up to the school, groups of students were swarming off buses and from cars. The first person I saw was a tall girl, sporting a trench coat, and short black hair. I decided that later on, when I had the chance, I'd talk to her. Finally pulling up the courage, I escaped from the safety of the car and walked up the steps to meet Avrie.



We stood on the steps and waited for the rest of our small group to appear, and finally I got to meet the girl everyone talked about all summer and kept assuring me that I would like her. Tara. She walked up to us and smiled, with a "hiya" directed toward the little group. I took her in, so beautiful and she seemed so bright and joyous, but I sensed a hidden pain, somethiing I knew, that I wouldn't learn about it until later, when we were closer.



We trudged up the steps and entered the hell hole that is junior high. As Tara departed, I knew that even though I had just met her, that I was going to get to know and like her even more. I just didn't know how much just yet.

<><><><><><>

Comments are muchly appreciated.

When you choose to hold the rose you are also agreeing to bleed.

Edited by: CEsgirl13  at: 5/15/04 12:23 pm

[sam darls]

Ooh, I love this so far..can't wait to read more. Love sammi xx

"Sometimes things happen between people that you don't really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong. And those are the ones that change your life." - Jessie Sammler (Evan Rachel Wood)

[littlecrazy80]

I like start. Wanna read more.



*lil´c*

"Okay, we’re here, we’re queer, let’s kick this shit into gear," Five by Five (Taras Shadow)



SweetAmber

[CEsgirl13]

Chapter 2

The first day of school went pretty well. Using a map and making at least one friend helped me get through. I made two new friends in my gym class when I needed to know where the band room was. They quickly introduced me to other people and I made more new friends.



I began to learn more about the mysterious girl in the trench coat, and her name turned out to be Jen. From what a lot of people said, she was cool, and was very accepting toward a lot of people. I wanted to get to know her, and I wanted to do it soon, but with the small amount of courage I held, it didn't happen until two weeks later.



(two weeks later)

Me, Anne, and Tristen were sitting against the bleachers in the gym, waiting for the bell to ring. I kept asking Tristen about Jen, and how much she knew about her. A shadow fell across my form and I looked up.

"Hello, short one." I looked up and there was Jen, tall as ever, with a smirk spread across her face.

"Well thanks for criticizing my height, but hey anyways," I replied trying to uphold some of my dignity.She smiled back at me and pulled a stray blonde bang back behind her ear.



We exchanged a few more quick comments and then retreated the large room as the bell rung. As I walked to my next period, I saw Tara walk by me, her eyes cast to the ground, and her hands tightyl wound around her books. She looked scared in the large group of people swarming around her.



I began to form a small crush on Jen, but knew it was pointless. She was striahgt, had even confirmed her old relationship with one of my guy friends, but what if she did like me? No, it couldn't happen and I knew it. But I was wrong.



As me and Jen sat out in front of her house talking, wiht her trying to figure out my secret(that i was gay), I found out that in fact, she didn't like guys either. My hert jumped at the thought that maybe, just maybe I had a chance.

HALLOWEEN

Jen was going to come to my house and we were going to meet up with Tara, Sara, Danielle, and Avrie. I saw Tara and my jaw dropped......



TBC

When you choose to hold the rose you are also agreeing to bleed.

[Yellow Crayon]

good job buddy.

storys going mad good. i can only imagine where the inspiration came from...

haha.



good job.

-tori

[sam darls]

I loved this part, so lovely. Love sammi xx

"Sometimes things happen between people that you don't really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong. And those are the ones that change your life." - Jessie Sammler (Evan Rachel Wood)

[littlecrazy80]

Liked this part.



*lil´c*

"Okay, we’re here, we’re queer, let’s kick this shit into gear," Five by Five (Taras Shadow)



SweetAmber

[Sheba]

Very interesting....how blind can WIllow be?!?!?! Looking forward to an update...I just love this AU first time meeting fics! Kudos to u!

[CEsgirl13]

Tara was in a coat very much resembling the one Trinity from the Matrix wore, and her hair was pulled back in a parted ponytail. She smiled at me and of course screamed "Willow!!" at me and launched herself at me in a crushing hug. My heart warmed up at the small contact and I fell into her embrace.



All too soon, Jen tapped me on the shoulder and looked nervously around, clearly stating with her eyes that she was unsure of what to do. I motioned to her to follow me into the 'haunted garage' and we slipped behind the wall covering and into Avrie's house.



Avrie ushered us back outside to show us the fog machine which I enjoyed running around in, while watching Tara in the strobe light.



We all decided to start leaving to go around the neighborhood but me and Avrie stayed at her house for a little while. After a few minutes of just standing in her driveway, we gave up and ran down the street talking in British accents about scones and tea. After what seemed forever, we caught up with the small group and I tagged along slightly behind the rest. Tara noticed this, and saw how sad I was. She draped her arm around my shoulder and yet again, I felt myself falling into her embrace.



I told her about the cutting and how much it hurt to like Jen, when I was certain she didn't like me. When we reached Jen's house, we caught up to the other's with me still in Tara's arms as we walked. The night ended all too soon, and I knew that there was something there between me and Tara, something new and exciting.



Later that night I was talking to Jen on the net and something was clearly bothering her. I told her about how I felt about Tara, that it all just seemed to fit, and how perfect it felt. I stopped short, when she told me that she liked me. Immediantly I went into panic mode, telling her I was sorry about talking about Tara to her.



We spent the rest of the conversation talking about different things until we both noticed that at three am we were both too exhausted to say anything else.



I woke up the next day, my mind whirling with thoughts of Jen and Tara, not sure what to do. I knew that I had absolutely no chance with Tara, so I made a daring move that day. On one of our online journals, I asked Jen if she would go out with me, her reply-I'll answer you in health class on Monday.



Instead of getting an answer, all I got was an uncomfortable silence. The rest of the day, I was panicking. What if she said no? Would I be alone forever? My heart stopped at these thoughts and I almost sobbed in the middle of the hallway.



The answer finally came to me on the walk home from school. As Jen was about to depart to her house she looked at me and said the words that pierced my heart. She told me that she didn't feel that way about me, that she wasn't ready to be in a relationship. I held back the tears and said I understood as I left.



I stumbled home, my heart now with a hole embedded deep. I had to find somebody to like, so it would just hurt a little less. Something to just take away a little bit of the pain away. I beat myself up the rest of the week, telling myself that I wasn't good enough for anyone.



This continued even onto that Friday when I was at skating. I propped myself up against the outside wall, my eyes downcast, my heart hurting. Tara came over to me and asked me what was wrong, and I told her how much I hurt after what Jen had said. Her cousin came over and they both declared that I was going home with them for the night.



A small smile spread across my face at the thought of hanging with Tara for the night, and I rushed to the payphone in the snackbar. My grandmother confirmed that yes, I was allowed to go. Nothing could have prepared me for the good and bad feelings awaiting me that night.



TBC

When you choose to hold the rose you are also agreeing to bleed.

[CEsgirl13]

Tara linked my arm with hers and we followed her cousin out to the van. As we piled into the car, we found out we had a slight problem-not enough room. Tara volunteered for me to sit on her lap, so I did yet I felt a tad awkward. The darkness outside prevented me from seeing the outside world. Against my back, I could feel Tara's every breath, every heartbeat, and for the first time in that entire week, I felt comfortable. Soon enough, her dad pulled up to the front of her cousin's house and let us out. I chuckled with them nervously, unsure of how to react because I had never been here and had never met her cousin's parents.



We entered, Tara still holding my arm against her, and it was quiet. Tara and her cousin led me upstairs to her room, and I leaned up against one of the walls. I did this occasionally when I was unsure of what to do, as to not let on too easily that I was scared. They both noticed to my disadvantage and they tried to fight me into pajamas but I simply refused and stood my ground. There next challenge-to get me into the bed so we could sleep since we were all tired. Well them at least. I was too excited at having Tara so close to me at that moment that sleep was a far away illusion.



Everytime they told me to get on the bed, I would reply with ,"Make me." With my not too bright mind, I figured out that saying that to a tired sixteen year old cousin was not good. She got up, dragged me to the bed-literally-and plopped me down halfways on Tara. I struggled to escape the confines of the bed, but Tara held me down and threatened to tickle me. Hearing this threat, I immediantly relaxed and stayed as still as possible. There would be no tickle-torture tonight. Instead I inflicted the torture on her cousin, which almost resulted in her falling off the bed.



Tara put on one of her mix cd's and Daniel Beddingfield's voice flowed through the speakers. The lights were shut off, and Tara slipped in next to me, grabbing my hand.



God Tara, don't let go, please don't let go.



She cuddled up next to me and took in a deep breath of air.



"You smell good. You smell like...hmm..Willow." A smile passed her lips and my heart warmed up at its power.



>If you’re not the one then why does my soul feel glad today

If you’re not the one then why does my hand fit yours this way

If you are not mine then why does your heart return my call

If you are not mine would I have the strength to stand at all<



Tara, can't you see? I love you. If only you knew...If only you knew.....



The songs changed as I felt Tara's breath soften, the only breathing that is let on by sleep. I turned slightyl sideways and watched her beautiful face. Even in sleep she amazed me. With a sigh, I turned back over and squeezed her hand lightly.

An hour went by, maybe more, when I felt myself shatter. She had wimpered and yanked her hand away, and even though I knew that maybe she wasn't conscious of doing it, the pain spiked through me.



God, oh god. She hates me. She thinks I'm disguisting.....



I heard her murmur a few more words, and then I slowly fell off into my own sleep. I awoke to the sun shining dully in my face. All the covers had been stolen by her cousin, and I was left chilled. Tara still lay asleep, but from the way she was moving, I could tell she was about to wake up. Out of habit, I sat up before she woke up and looked around. The music had finally clicked off sometime in the middle of the night.



Tara and her cousin led me downstairs and tried to convince me to eat something, but I refused as usual. Her cousin ventured off to the bathroom as she ate cereal and then put the bowl away. When she was finished she went and sat in a chair while I stood against the door frame. SHe looked up at me with something hidden that I couldn't identify.



"I wish I could be the one, but I'm just...I'm just not like that," she finally said after a prolonged silence. I don't know why, but those words pierced my heart like a newly sharpened knife.



"I kn-know." It took me forever, but I finally choked out those two words.



"I know how it hurts Willow. I've had so many guys play around with my heart and my mind..." Her eyes fell to the floor as the memories of those who had hurt her, rushed through. At that moment I wanted to kill anyone who had caused her the pain I now saw etched across her face.



"It's different with girls. Guys...they're just...They don't usually stop and consider how much pain they're going to cause. I don'd know why. It hurts so much. I like her, but she doesn't like me...back." The last few words only came out as a whisper as my eyes fell to the cat scuttling across the floor.



Silence wafted through the air like a deadly disease as my heart broke into smaller and smaller pieces. Why was I feeling this way? I was supposed to like Jen wasn't I? Yea, I liked her, but Tara. Wow. These feelings were so strong and powerful that I didn't know what to do.



A while later, after helping with a garage sale, I was dropped off at my house. Alone and confused I was as always, but even more so than usual.



Oh geeze, what am I going to do? I thought...ah man....Tara's so perfect and sweet and lovely and....



I stopped my mini-babble inside my head, and raced up to my room, looking for something to get my mind off of Tara.



*********

Well I hope you all liked this update. And if you kittens only knew where the inspiration for the story comes from. But that is a secret, that I must keep. So keep that feedback comin!

~Jamie

I LOVE CE

When you choose to hold the rose you are also agreeing to bleed.

[Spikeizmine87]

hiyas! I love this fic! I need it and i crave it and i most have more! Its oh so cute! Thanks for writting! More soon please??? I dont wanna pout!

-Rose

Feeling unwanted and hated is the worst feeling in the world.

Stop treating me like the kid Im not!

[Stroke of Luck]

Oh, just found ur story and i have to say, that i really like it I hope that Willows pain will go away and that Tara will discover her feelings for Willow



Cu

SoL/Natti

Even in death Baby, i´ll never leave u!

[Yellow Crayon]

Good job buddy. Good story, timely updates, good writing... better than I could ever do.

Understandable since you're cooler than me like whoa.



-Tori

[Taras Shadow]

Loving this story. very interesting.



I agree with the others, I hope Tara realizes her feelings for Willow. They're cute together.



Can't wait for more



~Holly~

Baby, baby, baby when all your love is gone, who will save me from all I'm up against out in this world

- Bright Lights - Matchbox Twenty

"Show me where to touch you." - Tara, It Ain't Fickle (Luciddream)

[CEsgirl13]

Monday came, and I drearily got ready, my mind still whirling from Friday and Saturday's events. It was clear that Tara didn't like me, that she didn't have any interest in me, cause of course, she lived in boys town.



Always fall in love with the straight ones don't you Rosenburg?



It had been almost as hard as last year when I had fallen for Lexi. She was the first girl I had ever loved, but as usual, she didn't love me back. Journals upon journals were filled up with my pain and heartache over her, and she had no idea.



Grumpily, I took my shower and got ready for school. I slipped into the car and was dropped off five minutes later, after picking up Avrie. We sat on the steps, me with my head perched lightly ontop of my hands which were sitting on my knees. I sighed deeply, but Avrie was oblivious to the action as she listened to Simple Plan while I kept going over what to do in my mind. Out of nowhere, an excited shout rang across the small junior high campus.



"Willow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Before I could register what was happening, I was flat on my back, Tara crushing me with a hug.



"Woah buddy, warn me next time right?" I quirked up an eyebrow at her, and she smiled at me laughing. I could feel her beath on my face. She was so close, and as I started to move forward, Sarah called out her name and she jumped up to greet her.



In your dreams brainy-type babbling, idiot-dykey Rosenburg. Only in your dreams would someone that perfect let you kiss them.



I hid my face behind my hands and let a tear slip down my cheek. I always had to fall for the ones I couldn't get. They were always the best people, but were never going to be mine. The rest of the day went by in a blur, nothing really registering. I needed to find somebody I could be with. Somebody that at least liked me back. And then it came to me...



Jill. She has her boyfriend Don, but she told me that she liked me a few days ago.....



I excitedly jumped onto my computer when I got home and immediantly awaited Jill to sign on. When she did, I told her that I liked her, and I told Jen too. Maybe Jen could see how she had hurt me, how she had torn me up. And Tara, she would see too. She would see.



The week went by, me happier than usual at finding someone to at least like me back. Tara kept telling me about how she was so in love with John, how beautiful his long hair was, how sweet he was. Yuk. Everytime I saw her hug him, I would always think, that could be me. Tara, I can give you so much that he can't. Please come to me....please....



No matter how loud the silent cries of pain were in my head, she was oblivious to their pain and anguish. For that whole week and onto the next, I tried not to allow Tara to invade my mind anymore.



Let only the thoughts of Jill in, then you can forget about Tara. You won't have to go through that pain everyday.



The next Tuesday when Jen and I were walking home, I was shocked out of my painless little world.



"I....the truth is Willow....I do like you. I just..." She stopped and then told me about how she was just so scared of how she felt. Oh god, this turned things around. My little world was falling into pieces.



"No...no..no" I whispered quietly, mainly to myself. This made everything so confusing, when I had just made it all un-confusing.



And then that night, what I had wished for most of all happened, but I didn't know if I wanted it anymore. Tara told me she liked me, definately more than a friend.



Oh god, oh god. She likes me. Beautfiul, loving, sexy, nice, sweet Tara likes me. But no, I've had this act with me liking Jill so long, that I've actually started to fall for her. Oh god, what am I going to do?



The next night Tara asked me if I wanted to spend the night at her house after skating. I almost didn't agree, but thought, What the heck, might as well. At least I'll get to see her.



******

Well I hope you kittens like this. Might I add-there is a LOT of angst in this story, but it all prevails. Don't worry.

When you choose to hold the rose you are also agreeing to bleed.

[sam darls]

Ooh, I missed updates They were so good I loved them. Even though your insperation is a secret, I'm happy for you Love sam xx

"Sometimes things happen between people that you don't really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong. And those are the ones that change your life." - Jessie Sammler (Evan Rachel Wood)

[CEsgirl13]

Friday came and at twenty minutes until eight o'clock, I was jittery as hell. Trying to calm my nerves, I pulled out all three of my yearbooks and began to leaf through them. Leah and Jin from fifth to seventh grade. Wow had they changed. And so had I. I had begun to shrug off my geekiness, well actually, it was like my intelligence just decided to get on an express subway out of Willow-brain.



School was harder and it wasn't getting any easier. I was constantly being pressured about my grades and how my mother had been a straight A student. They always ended with the same comment, "Why can't you be like your mother?" But what they were really saying was, "You're not bright enough to make it through middle school. You're a failure Willow and that's what we're really saying."



I excelled in Language Arts, which was ironic since I had passed with a D in that class the previous year. So many stories and ideas came to my mind, and because of that, I was constantly writing stories, making up my own worlds. Every week for our vocab test, we would have to write two paragraphs with the words in them. I could go anywhere with these stories and I did. I expressed my pain and sorrow behind the words and the fake names.



My Evenascence cd skipped a bit and I cursed at the damned cd player. It was always giving me trouble and one of these days, I knew it was going to end up thrown out of my second story window. I had my grandfather always nagging me because I was quite advanced in technology. I think this intimidated him, so we didn'y speak that much anymore.



My grandmother yelled up to me that Tara had finally arrived. Instantly, I panicked.



Oh, goddess, how do I look. Ak! I look horrible, well that's everyday but geeze...what is Tara going to think....



Have a full-blown babble war raging in my head, I grabbed my ice skates and started down the stairs. What awaited me, put me into shock.



Oh, wow. She's so...beautiful. Oh god, I just want to touch her face....Bad Willow, Bad. You're going skating with her and you're thinking about how beautiful she is when she doesn't even go for your gender.



Mentally kicking myself, I stuttered a greeting which she replied with a, "Hiya!"



After telling my grandmother goodbye, we made our way to the van and went on our way to skating and to get her cousin. When we got there, the first noticeable thing was the cold outside. It was ripping through my clothes and tearing at me.



After what seemed forever, we walked into the huge rink. The first thing I noticed was Jill.



YES! she's here. JILL'S HERE!!!!!



Now I could partly get my mind off of Tara, who was currently so close I could've kissed her right then, but didn't even have the courage. I flung my arms around Jill's neck and we talked for a few minutes about the current social issues at school and home. Judging from the way Tara was acting, she wanted to get out of this situation and fast. Telling Jill that I'd talk to her again in a few minutes, I dragged Tara away to a secluded corner.



"You okay Tare?"



"See this," she pointed to her smile," painful smile."



"Aww, Tara. I'm sorry." I hugged her tightly to me. I could smell her, god she smelled so good.



"Come on, let's go have us some fun." I took her hand and pulled her to the snackbar. As usual our little group of friends was scattered around the warm room. Ace motioned over to me and Tara, telling us to come and sit with her and Jill.



Jill saw me and knocked on the glass, indicating for me to come out. I did so and happily. Tara was closer to me than she had ever been and it had been driving me crazy while Ace had been ranting about how much her school sucked.



"What's up Jill?" We said a few more things and then I made a remark about how I could take her any day.



"Oh, yeah. You could take me right? In your dreams buddy." To show her that I could, I jumped onto her back and held onto her throat. She floundered about, trying to pull my arms off, digging her nails in my arm during the process. As I jumped off, I looked into the snackbar and Tara's eyes met mine. A flicker of hurt reared its ugly head inside her eyes.



No, I hurt her. God, I didn't mean..I....I was just trying to make it hurt less.....



I reentered the snackbar and took a sit next to Lauren. Tara had done a dissapearing act before I had come back in.



"Where's Tara, Ace?" I nodded toward the empty space where Tara had been only minutes before.



"Uh, I think she went to go find Jill." Big, flashing neon signs pointed out that this was bad. This was really bad. Fighting the urge to head off and find her, I sat there and worried. Five minutes later, tired of the feelings penetrating my skull, I retreated to go sit on the bleachers where no one would bother me.



I bowed my head. I was sad. I wanted Tara, I wanted her bad. But if I wanted her so bad, then why didn't I just take the chance and be with her? I couldn't even answer my own question. Gently, a hand touched my should and I pulled up my face slightly to acknowledge Tara.



"Hey, you okay Willow?" I shook my head with unshed tears glistening in my eyes.



I questioned her on what she had told Jill. Tara had told Jill how she felt about me. She also told her that she should dump Don to be with me, because I obviously liked her. Tara told her that she cared about me so much, that even if being with someone else would make me happy, she would deal with it. As long as I was happy. I hugged her then, amazed at her strength.



I looked up in shock at the glaring red letters on the clock. It was ten o'clock already? That was incredable.



"Hey Tare?" I nodded toward the clock and she picked up that it was time to leave and head on to her house. She returned her skates while I went in search of her cousin. All three of us met up at the doors and we went outside to pile into the van. The ride was silent, only when her cousin left did we say anything.



When we finally reached her house, she pulled my hand and directed me up the stairs to her room. I could tell it was her room immediantly because of the Matrix poster taped to the door. I smiled. She was so unique and so special, and so...perfect.



She sat cross-legged on the floor and told me I could do the same. I sat next to her, tyring to get closer as she showed me loads of pictures. On her cd player was a sweet song on repeat. Her sister apeared in the doorway and yelled at her to shut it off or she would shut Tara off. Oh, the greatness of sibling rivalry. They bickered back and forth until her father settled it.



"You wanna go downstairs now so we can watch a movie?"



"Sure, Tare." I followed her down the stairs and into the room. Her brother sat on the couch and as we walked in she told him to leave. He did so reluctantly and I was grateful for us being left alone. Tara went to fiddle with the VCR as I plopped down onto the couch. When she had finally figured out, she joined me, sitting close.



I pretended to be completely into the movie but it wasn't working. To ease the tension I stole her glasses.



"Hey, thats not fair. I'm blind without those."



"Well, I'm blind too, but you don't see me wearing mine." To prove my point, I took the glasses off and handed them back to Tara.



"See, wait. No, I can read that one gameboard. It says.....rummicub." I laughed excitedly at my small triumph.



"Willow, that says Rummikub."



"Oh, darn. Told you I was blind." She chuckled at me and I knew I was blushing. Sadly, we went back to watching the movie and her cat Angel curled up in between us. Absentmindedly, I began petting the cat and so did she. Our hands came so close to touching, but by whatever chance it was, they never did. That was, until we slowly laced our fingers together.



Oh Goddess, she's touching me. She's actually touching me....



Occasionally we would squeeze the others hand, letting each other know that our hands were still linked. And everytime, it shot white bolts of energy through my veins. The movie finally ended and we let it shut off by itself. I twisted myself sideways so that I was looking at her.



We talked about how life was, about our issues and such. Finally, I decided it was time for third-person speaking to tell her.



"Willow is trying to muster up the courage to do something."



"Oh, and what would Willow be trying to do?"



We bantered playfully back and forth and after a while, I pretended to start falling asleep. The atmosphere in the room changed, something was different.



"I was wondering if this was what you were trying to do," Tara whispered before softly kissing me. I kissed her back, for the first time feeling loved. I hugged her and she held onto me tightly, refusing to let go. Our breathing was ragged as we kissed again and again. And everytime it was like a dream.



"Jill can have Don for now. Actually, ya know what? Jill can have Don forever."



Tara pulled back and looked me in the eyes.



"Does that mean you'll go out with me."



"Yes." Tara pulled me in for a bone crushing hug and we sat there, holding onto each other. Eventually we fell alseep, with Tara leant against me on the couch.



She's so beautiful, look at her. And mine, finally mine. Goddess, I love her.



To her sleeping form, I whispered, "I love you Tara," and kissed her gently on her forehead. I drifted off to sleep and dreamt of her, only her.



*******

I hope everyone liked the update. I think it's a bit longer than the others. Love you all!

~Jamie

I LOVE CE

When you choose to hold the rose you are also agreeing to bleed.

[Yellow Crayon]

ohhh kisses!



good job jamie. you're the best. much love.



-tor

[Spikeizmine87]

i love this! with the cute hand holding! awww!

so cute! and the smoochies! i need more!!

-Rose

Feeling unwanted and hated is the worst feeling in the world.

Stop treating me like the kid Im not!

[girlfriends actually]

Great story so far!!

[Stroke of Luck]

YES i liked the update But my fav part was when Willow and Tara linked their fingers and when they kissed *Sigh*



Cu

SoL/Natti

Even in death Baby, i´ll never leave u!

[sam darls]

Aww..so lovely. And they finally kissed..so sweet. Great update. Love sam xx

"Sometimes things happen between people that you don't really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong. And those are the ones that change your life." - Jessie Sammler (Evan Rachel Wood)

[CEsgirl13]

hey kittens! I'm sorry for the lack of update, but I'm trying to figure out how to do the next one. Well my love told me to reveal my inspiration so here it is. The story is based off of me and Callie's relationship. Good and bad, but most of the personal stuff is staying between us as it should be. Tori being the good friend she is, kept it a secret for us. Love ya Tor! Anyways, expect an update in the next few days. I love you all!

~CEsgirl13

I LOVE CALLIE

*ETA-Willow is me and Tara is Callie

When you choose to hold the rose you are also agreeing to bleed.

Edited by: CEsgirl13  at: 5/9/04 4:59 pm

[LoverofLesbianCharacter2]

I really like this story. I especially enjoy the fact that Tara was the one who thought she was straight. It makes for an interesting twist to the story. They are so cute, especially when they finally kissed. Can't wait for more.





Peace out

[CEsgirl13]

The light spilled through the window across her soft features. Her eyes fluttered open, but closed again. I looked down at my feet, noticing my shoes were still on.



Smart Willow. You didn't even take them off. Oh look, she still has your jacket on...



A loud thump announced the arrival of her dog and it woke her up. She stirred slowly, opening her eyes slightly and they opened faster as she saw me.



"Hey," she croaked out. Sleep was still evident in her voice.



"Hey back," I said smiling. Her dog trotted up to us and jumped onto my lap, and considering his size, hurt a little. Tara shooed him away as we heard her family getting up. That morning went by in a blur. We did a lot of things and worried over telling Jen about us.

****

I woke up on Monday excited and for once happy. I sung in the shower, amazed that me-brainy, geeky, dorky, Willow Rosenburg, actually got the girl. I practically skipped up the steps to the school building that morning and Avrie could tell something was up.



"Willow, what's with all the happy?"



"What do you mean? I'm just being normal."



"Well if you consider skipping around and whispering to yourself 'i got her, i got her' normal, then I guess you're fine. But Will, this is the real world and something's up. So won't you just get with the info-giving?" She gave me a hopeful look but I wasn't giving in.



"You'll find out as soon as she gets here." She looked at me quizzically, more than likely trying to figure out who 'she' was.



A van pulled up and out of it came Tara.



Oh Goddess, she's more beautiful than I remember...Heh I didn't think that was possible.



Her eyes made a quick sweep of the school and found mine. Locked onto the other's, she walked up to me and hugged me fiercely.



"I could always use a good 'hello' like that. I think I can get used to this." Tara pulled a strand of hair back behind my ear.



"Ohhhhhh, now I get it," Avrie piped up. Everything clicking neatly into place. I smiled hugely, bursting on the inside with pride and love. Here was the most beautiful person in the world, hugging me like there was no tomorrow. This happiness couldn't end. But that one false assumption was to give in to something so painful that I wanted to die.

***

Sorry for the lack pf update lately, I've been a little busy. This update was short because this is kind of how it went. I was extremely happy and then BAM! out of nowhere something happened that broke my heart into tiny little shards. anyways, hope everyone liked the update!

~Jamie

J C

When you choose to hold the rose you are also agreeing to bleed.

[Yellow Crayon]

amazing bud, you may think its too short, but i loooved it.



good job buddy, i love you.

[sam darls]

I agree with Tori..amazing job. I loved it . Love sam xx

"Sometimes things happen between people that you don't really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong. And those are the ones that change your life." - Jessie Sammler (Evan Rachel Wood)

[CEsgirl13]

I ran even though the only thing chasing me was the gathering darkness. Something told me I needed to get home, needed to run to the warmth away from the cold that was threatening to rip me to pieces. The chilling wind stung my eyes as I ran faster and faster. Finally, I yanked open the door and the warmth of my home welcomed me in. Some unknown force was pulling me in, telling me that something was going to happen tonight, something I wouldn't like.



I sat down on the couch, sinking into the fabric. I switched the TV on and put on my favorite show. The pillow I had snuggled up against, felt like Tara. So soft and welcoming and safe. I clicked off the TV and walked upstairs, sitting in my chair and logging onto the internet. Nothing could have prepared me for what was to come. tara was on and my heart lept into my throat, excited to be able to talk to her. A frown made its home on my face as she IMed me.



RosesLuv: Willow, we need to talk.

AthenasChild:I have a feeling I won't like this.

RosesLuv:I told my mom about us Willow....

AthenasChild:She doesn't like it does she?

RosesLuv:Listen Willow, my mom doesn't want me to date...anyone. It's not because you're a girl....it's just she doesn't want me to date yet. Maybe in a few years Willow, but right now I'm not stable.

AthenasChild:oh god, oh god....no please Tara no

RosesLuv:I'm sorry Willow, I love you.



Tara logged off after that, and my heart had decided to stop beating. Tears tracked down my face as I thought about how I was alone...again. I knew it was too good to be true. Everything good was always taken away. I cried for hours, wanting to die. Tara and I were meant to be. Why didn't her parents see that? I cried myself to sleep that night and vowed not to go out with anyone ever again unless it was Tara.

When you choose to hold the rose you are also agreeing to bleed.

[sam darls]

That was so beautiful, and so sad. I loved it though. Love sam xx

"Sometimes things happen between people that you don't really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong. And those are the ones that change your life." - Jessie Sammler (Evan Rachel Wood)

[her BRIGHTeyes]

wtf... what the eff just happened??



they broke up?

what??? why??/ stupid parents...



*hypervenilating** update soonish??

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

she had eyes bright enough to burn me --conor oberst