Sick. Severed. Shots! - A Drinking Game for the Embittered

[maudmac]

Are you bitter? Do you feel betrayed? Have you recently been exposed to a whoppin' ton of complete and utter shit from your former favorite show? Dread Tuesday nights now?



Here's a little something to wash the bile down with.



The Season Severed Drinking Game. You'll laugh! You'll cry! (And all forum rules and guidelines still apply!)



Anyway, here's how it works. Drink (sip, gulp, finish it off, whatever, you decide) when some stupid-ass ridiculous fucked up shit happens. Drink when something incredibly unlikely happens. Drink whenever. It's up to you. Basically, drink when the show is on.



But do try not to get alcohol poisoning. (Don't drink alcohol if you're underage! Drink water or something. It's good for you, anyway.)



For example, every time:

• Someone says, "From beneath you, it devours," drink.
• Someone says, "Who's got the power?" drink
• NotWillow's eyes go black, drink
• Xander saves the day, with or without his crayon, drink
• A woman dies, chug
• Someone should mention Tara, but doesn't, sip
• Someone alludes to Tara in some way, drink
• Someone actually says Tara's name, finish it off

There must be a million others we can come up with, Kittens.

---------------------------
NO MORE SYMBIOSIS JUST PSYCHOSIS---CONSOLIDATED

[BytrSuite]

Ooh, fun topic. By these rules I shall drink myself into a stupor every Tuesday night.

• Every time a death is reversed, drink
• Every time the writers have someone try to tell us it's okay to be gay, but never show us, drink
• Every time a woman is shown to need a man for her well-being and happiness, drink

————––

"There's a whole lot of singing that's never gonna be heard

Disappearing everyday without so much as a word somehow"

[Triscuit7]

Yay - a game I can play on Tuesday nights and one I can do with alcolhol when I'm off on the following Wed. And hey, I think I even understand the rules.



Ciao, Melissa

**********************




I brought marshmallows!

[Shewolf]

That's a great idea! Beeing paralytically drunk is one way to get through a Buffy episode these days...





Here's a few suggestions:



-Buffy gets on her moral high horse-sip

-Dawn gets a themed episode-jug

"When authorities warn you of the sinfulness of sex, there is an important lesson to be learned. Do not have sex with the authorities."



- Matt Groening

[urnofosiris]

It's a good thing I am not watching anymore or I would be permanently intoxicated.



Cheers

[Dumbsaint]

*stumbles into thread, grinning sloppily*



I love you, man.

"And never let it be said that I left a Tara craving unsatisfied." Willow, Wilderness Pt. 1

[AutumnT]

Quote:

---

#

# Every time the writers have someone try to tell us it's okay to be gay, but never show us, drink

---

This alone with the "not that there's anything wrong with that" (except of course you are miserable or die) attitude could lead to alcohol poisoning.

Autumn

-----------

BUFFY: I could wrestle naked in grease for a living and still be cleaner than after a shift at the Doublemeat.

WILLOW: Plus, I'd visit you at work every single day.

[tyche]

(For all of the below, take a maximum 20 sips per episode - don't want y'all to end up in hospital.)

* Every time Spike starts to whine about how hard things are for him, what a bitch Buffy is and how we should all feel his pain - sip.

* Every time Buffy, Dawn or Xander jumps to conclusions about Willow / acts like Willow isn't their friend / acts like they've had a convenient morality bypass - sip.

* Every time patriarchy saves the day - sip.

* Every time a woman gets degraded, tortured, raped or killed - sip.

* Every time someone who isn't Tara gets brought back to life - down drink, curse Mutant Enemy and their fucked-up sense of morality.

* Every time there's a new development in Willow's magic addiction storyline which makes what's gone before completely nonsensical - chug.

* Every time you can hear Joss's feminist film studies tutors wailing and gnashing their teeth in despair - sip.

* Every time you start to think that maybe Riley wasn't so bad after all compared with Xander's current behaviour - chug.

* Every time you see a clip from a previous season/episode that's obviously there to save money and pad things out - sip.

* Every time you want to slap somebody (doesn't matter if they're a character, writer or producer) - sip.

* The episode you're watching is a rip-off of another Buffy/Angel/Firefly episode - down drink. (You'll need it.)

* Every time whatever's on screen makes the Initiative arc of season 4 look like a work of art - chug.

* Every time you think that reading the phone book/chewing off your own arm might be more interesting/less painful than watching what's on screen - chug.

* Somebody treats Willow like a human being, as opposed to a piece of dirt - drink the bottle.

* Somebody actually acts like Tara was more important than a one-episode Mary Sue - down drink, fall off chair in shock.

Edited by: BytrSuite at: 10/24/02 1:23:13 pm

[kyraroc]

Everytime a character makes a sanctimonious moral speech to another character, sip.



If they're arguing against doing something that they themselves have done in the past, and fail to acknowledge this in any way, drink.



If it's Xander, chug.



--- KR

Lost in Ecstacy

[circular reference]

This game is the BEST!



--CR

"Hold the fire... I'm coming in."

[Pipsqueak]

BWAH HA HA HA HA! Oh, what fun.



I've got some more rules:



- Buffy keeps a secret from her friends - drink.

- We are introduced to one of Dawn's boring high school classmates - drink.

- Spike mumbles some crazy dialogue that nobody understands - drink.

- Xander talks about his construction job - drink.

- Someone makes up a word by adding a "y" to the end of an existing word - chug.

- People sit around and do nothing but talk for longer than 60 seconds - chug.

- Xander goes vampire/demon hunting with Buffy (why???) - chug.

- The episode ends on a depressing note - finish the bottle.



This game won't help me as much as it helps some of you, since I don't drink alcohol and must therefore watch the show while sober. On the other hand, even if I use water, I'll still have to pee every 3 minutes. Maybe this game can be used to keep me in the bathroom for the full hour.

~~~~~~~~~~
"Nothing in the world is the way it ought to be. It's harsh, and cruel. But that's why there's us. Champions.
It doesn't matter where we come from, what we've done or suffered, or even if we make a difference.
We live as though the world was what it should be, to show it what it can be." -- Angel

[Taz]

Cool game.



Everytime Buffy actually kills a vampire-sip.

Everytime Xander is a nice-drink.

Everytime Buffy remembers Willow is one of her best friends-drink and be shocked.

Everytime it looks like Dawn might get her own show-drink heavily.

Everytime Willow looks lost and lonely-drink to forget.

Whenever you get a hint of our old Willow-sip.



Now I can'r wait till next week.

I refuse to believe that this is all. ~~Xiren Everything

[sparrow]

There;s not that much alcohol in the world to help me get through an episode.

And yet, I just can't seem to care
What no hug

[WiccansIllusion]

* every time Dawn tries to give advice -shot



*everytime Buffy tries to give advice -sip



* every time Anya mentions money- sip



* every time Xander is seen in his hard hat -shot



* every time someone is in the basement, despite the fact that they KNOW about the hellmouth -sip

Tara nodded in agreement "She has magic fingers." TheWisdom of War, Chris Golden



You don’t really think this is like… Psycho Buffy Cheer Squad central, do you?-Xita ala Julia "Lessons Parody"

[4WiccanLuv]

Great game!!



Everytime Xander brags about how successful he is - drink

Everytime Spike sports his "redemption" hair - drink

Everytime Willow discovers a dead body - chug

Everytime Buffy changes her outfit - drink (you'll need a very large bottle)

Everytime Anya sings - chug (that last song was just awful)

Everytime Giles wipes off his glasses - drink

Everytime Dawn researches - drink

[Spice Faerie]

Dude, this game RULES! I can't wait for Tuesday. I'm gonna be SO FUCKING DRUNK!!! Woohoo! Finally, a reason to look forward to Tuesday again...



Spice

"No candles? Well, I brought one. It's extra flamey..."

[Zippy]

Sky won't be showing Buffy until January.



So based upon what I have read so far about what's going to happen in season severed, I shall be applying the following rules to my drinking game.



Rule 1, Sky one anouncer states Buffy will be on after the break. Get up, leave house, walk round corner to pub, buy pint and drink. Continue to buy and drink pints at will whlist enjoying my thursday evening.



Actually, I'm looking forward to season seven now, bring it on!

'This better be good Ross, I could be at home, flicking off to Trisha'
Pauline from The League of Gentlemen

[tommo]

How about



Everytime Buffy opens her mouth and says something, drink.



Everytime Xander is onscreen, club yourself over the head with your empty wine bottle.



Everytime NotWillow lets her friends talk about her when she's there, fill your bath with gin and get in.

You exquisite little tart!" ~ Diana Letharby

[AutumnT]

Quote:

---

Everytime NotWillow lets her friends talk about her when she's there, fill your bath with gin and get in.

---

Um Ruth?



Question.



Can I substitute vodka instead? Can there be olives?

Autumn

-----------

BUFFY: I could wrestle naked in grease for a living and still be cleaner than after a shift at the Doublemeat.

WILLOW: Plus, I'd visit you at work every single day.

[EffieBlue]

Every time Xander speaks.. drink



everytime xander speaks.. drink....



Oh I said that...sorry i drank after typing it...





This is one I put in the old drinking game but I think it still works..



Everytime someone spills something down themselves when chugging..



Stand, point... and shout "Your shirt"



everyone has to drink then..lots..and lots



***************************

Well fuck me over a hostess trolly!! You don't say!..Eleanor when being told Love has the most deffinitions in the dictionary.. in Born Romantic

[tommo]

Autumn, I believe that any suitable spirit will do. As long as there's lots of it. And olives, well, yeah, of course. Dancing girls too, if they're available.



Speaking of which, get your drinking gear in order, okay? Hee.

You exquisite little tart!" ~ Diana Letharby

[starlitefaeriegrrrl]

" Every time whatever's on screen makes the Initiative arc of season 4 look like a work of art - chug."



This rule alone would have me drunk off my ass within five minutes after the credits. No. I mean, really. As soon as a character started to explain what this week's very special episode was about I would be downing the bottle. I feel that I wouldn't last long.

[AutumnT]

Quote:

---

Speaking of which, get your drinking gear in order, okay? Hee.

---

Like that's hard for me.

Autumn

-----------

BUFFY: I could wrestle naked in grease for a living and still be cleaner than after a shift at the Doublemeat.

WILLOW: Plus, I'd visit you at work every single day.

[Taz]

My girl says:

Everytime Buffy tells Spike they could never be together and that she doesn't love him-drink and roll your eyes.

Dawn-drink lots and lots.

I refuse to believe that this is all. ~~Xiren Everything

[NoveltyAct]

Autumn wrote:

Quote:

---

Can I substitute vodka instead? Can there be olives?

---

Um...*tap tap*



Could I *have* your olives?



Then, you can start adding bar condiments to the drinking game, so instead of sip, drink, chug, you could have:



eat an olive

eat a marischino cherry

tie the cherry stem into a knot with your tongue

eat the olive, pimento stuffing first...



On second thought, that's too good to waste on a show like Buffy. *thinks* hey! could we have a fanfic drinking game instead? (olives for every time ruth mentions landscapes; cherries for every mention of strip chess in sass's fics... ) i rather think that would be time better invested...

---------------


Whisk, woman!

[AutumnT]

Quote:

---

Could I *have* your olives?

---

You say that like you've seen me drink a martini before.



I do like the idea of a fanfic drinking game, but then we would need Ruth and Sass to get writing.

Autumn

-----------

BUFFY: I could wrestle naked in grease for a living and still be cleaner than after a shift at the Doublemeat.

WILLOW: Plus, I'd visit you at work every single day.

[tommo]

Right now, there's more chance of Tara coming back, I think.

You exquisite little tart!" ~ Diana Letharby

[NoveltyAct]

*cough*



hey, don't look at me, sitting in my office, working away on a saturday afternoon...surfing the kitten...



and seen you drink a martini, autumn? no, i think i must have dreamt that...cos there were an awful lot of trout swimming around, and then albert einstein fell over in the ladies' room, and...



uh, never mind.

---------------


Whisk, woman!

[iceprincess2076]

well now, here my friends and I have just been sitting around the last 5 tuesday nights getting drunk off our butts, laughing at how pathetic this show has gotten and trying really really hard not to throw the tv out the front door.



WE COULD HAVE BEEN PLAYING THIS GAME AND REALLY HAD SOME FUN! Oh well, we wont be watching this tuesday cause who wants to see a repeat? It was bad enough the first time. But come Nov 5th were actually gonna enjoy tuesday night again. Thanks for the game. it will be put to very good use. I do, however, think that I will need to go to the liquor store much more frequently now.



here's an idea: everytime Xander speaks or even comes on screen down bottle. that way you can forget it ever happened.





ICE

I'm not bitter. I'm not bitter......yeah....riiiight!

[hush30]

I haven't seen season severed but I'm sure this will happen at some stage (it has every other season).



Buffy saying 'WHAT DID YOU DO! WHAT DID YOU DO!' like she's never done anything wrong......ever.



When this comes up let me know and I'll have a drink. Oh what the hell it's a sure thing so I'll have a drink now. This game is fun

"I think this line's mostly filler" - Willow in OMWF