"Grey Sky" -
16th Nov 2008
Looking outside my window I see the dark sky.
Grey clouds painting the horizon, once so beautiful.
I can’t stop but asking myself why.
Is any of this right?
I see deep into your eyes,
I can feel your soul surrounding me.
You’re just a picture in my mind and though you make me blue,
I’m happy, excited and nervous only because of you.
I’m hoping for something more – a deeper connection,
While now I’m sitting here watching the sky by myself.
Why do I miss you, when I don’t know you at all?
You deserve something better I know and so they say.
Though I tried to forget you, tried to ignore what you mean to me,
I failed again and again.
At times I feel so loved, so much cared for.
And suddenly it’s all gone, like I’m putting the world’s weight on your shoulders.
Still as much as I wanted and tried not to love you, I just couldn’t.
You mean the world to me and this you know,
Make me feel so strong, so alive, but you’re only a picture in my mind.
I’d promise you forever and a day, however I’m afraid.
So I’m all by myself asking why can something, that seems so wrong, feel so right?
"Numb" -
8th Dec 2008
Why are you doing this to me?
I just told my thoughts, honest for once.
And now you turn your back on me.
Why am I doing this at all, I keep asking.
I told you I wouldn’t run, wouldn’t fall to my knees
And beg and crawl on the floor hoping to be forgiven. I won’t.
You made me mad so many times before.
I’d always give in, listen to your excuses, telling you that it’s okay.
Did you ever mean a thing you said to me?
Why do I even care?
All of this started because I do,
But now I’m not sure if I even want to anymore.
It’s like one of those bad dreams,
Where I see you leave and never turning back.
Not even to see me fall.
I think those pieces of my mind say more, than I could say right now. Enjoy.