FF: RW Season Ep 7.6 "Past"

[KathleenWolf]

Continued from 7.5:



Hello to all the dedicated RainbowKittens, Kittens en mass and lurkers alike...



After everyone being so patient while Beth and I had a little down time I finally got some editing done and I wanted to share the teaser and first scene for the next ep in our season... I'm not sure at this time how frequently we'll be able to be with the updates but we'll try to be as consistent as we can... the best part is we know how wonderful and patient everyone on the board is and we so appreciate that...



so without further adieu... episode six... the teaser:



Scene: Glory sitting beside Tara on a park bench, her hand grips Tara’s. The Wicca turns to face the Hell God her face resolute and her lips firmly shut.



“Fine. Let’s get crazy.”



Glory caresses the side of Tara’s face with her other hand as Tara whimpers and tries to pull her face away.



Voice Over: When you think the madness has stopped…



Scene: From a tall rickety structure, Buffy throws her self off towards the dimensional rift.



Voice Over: When you think the pain has ended…



Scene: Willow knelt on the ground beside Buffy’s grave mid resurrection spell.



Voice Over: When you think everyone is back to how they should be…



Scene: Tara looks through a book. She holds the piece of dried herb up to a picture of the same herb. Closing on the book.



“Lethe’s Bramble. Used for augmenting spells of forgetting and mind control.”



Voice Over: And that what has been done is over and gone…



Scene: Tara walks down the stairs holding a box. The front door of the house is open. She walks out onto the porch where Dawn is but she reaches out for her but the teenager runs inside.



Voice Over: That’s when it takes you most by surprise…



.... and now commericals over... to the show



COPYRIGHT DISCLAIMER: Buffy The Vampire Slayer, Willow, Tara, Xander, Anya, Giles, Dawn, Spike and all other characters who have appeared in the syndicated series Buffy The Vampire Slayer, together with the names, titles and back story are the sole copyright property of Joss Wheldon, Fox and Mutant Enemy. No copyright infringement was intended in the writing of this fan fiction. All other characters, the story idea and the story itself are the sole property of the authors. This story cannot be sold or used for profit in any way. Please contact the authors for permission to reproduce this story on any other fanfiction site.



LOVE/ GRAPHIC SEX DISCLAIMER: This story depicts a love relationship between two consenting adult women. If you are under 18 years of age or if this type of story is illegal in the state or country in which you live, please do not read it. If depictions of this nature disturb you, you may wish to read something other than bthis story. (Please note this may not apply until much further parts but it will be an integral part of the storyline.)



TIMEFRAME: Season Seven done Rainbow Writers Style… we are taking all that has aired up until Grave as gospel and working with what the bad evil Josh has given us… the difference WE LOVE WILLOW AND TARA… so we’re going to fic all the horribleness… the theme is still “Back to the Beginning” as hinted at… but with a total focus on fixing what was done to our gorgeous lovely couple.



PAIRING: Willow and Tara… obviously!



BIG GIANT HUGE ANGST/UNHAPPINESS DISCLAIMER: So if you’ve seen season six… you know… ME sucks… they took us all down a road we never wanted to go… but now we have to get back… so the ride will be bumpy… but we promise this time the light… its daylight and NOT a train!



WORK OF THE RAINBOW WRITERS WARNING! … If you know our stuff you know we can OWN pain and suffering when we want too… stock up: tissues, chocolate, have loved ones near… we’re going to get to a happy place but we’re not going to gloss over the damage ME has done.



YELLOW CRAYON XANDER WARNING: In the vein of trying to be nice… we’ve decided its time for Xander to clean up some of his act and take on some responsibility… no he’s not turning into super Xander, but maybe a more respectable guy.

Episode 7.6



Past

By: The Rainbow Writers



Tara opened her eyes slowly, aware that the bed beside her was empty and that the soft sunlight was trying to struggle through the cream gauzy linen curtains over the window. She flipped slowly over onto her back and then stretched out fully in the bed trying to work out how long she had been alone.



For a long, long moment she almost forgot everything that had given her the troubled night she had had but then she recalled with clarity the broken images and ghost-like memories that had drifted through her dreamscape.



“Willow?” Tara said softly testing if the redhead was in earshot.



“Hi baby.” Willow poked her head out of the bathroom with a toothbrush in her mouth.



“Morning.” Tara smiled at her girlfriend. “You’re up and awake.” She pointed out.



“I am.” Willow moved over and sat down. “I guess almost getting eaten by a direwolf makes me wants to just live life.”



“Very commendable.” Tara nodded. “But remember you were injured.” She added softly.



“I thought we could go to the mall. Do some shopping, maybe have lunch at some cute little restaurant?” Willow offered her idea of a good day.



“Is that wise?” Tara frowned gently.



“Why wouldn’t it be?” Willow frowned slightly with her.



“Direwolf, nearly rearranged various bones in your body.” Tara pointed out reaching out to gently stroke up and down Willow’s arm.



“What do you want to do with the day?” Willow questioned distracted by the soft touch.



“No, I mean if you feel up to the mall...” Tara didn’t want to disappoint the redhead.



“No, if you don’t... we could hang out here and watch Xander rebuild the living room.” Willow tried a light smile.



“You want to go shopping I can tell you have that I want to go shopping gleam that I feel sure I got used too.” Tara smiled lovingly.



“Did someone mention shopping?” Suddenly the half-ajar door swung open and Dawn’s fresh face poked around it.



“I had mentioned it briefly but Tara thinks we need to rest.” Willow turned to the teenager.



“Rest smesht.” Dawn giggled as she blew off the worry.



“Why don’t you two go shopping.” Tara came up with the idea. “You could take Buffy along.”



“But what are you doing to do?” Willow questioned worried.



“Take it easy, pass Xander nails and cold beer.” Tara made a few suggestions with a smile.



“Do you want to go Dawnie?” Willow looked at the teenager wanting to do her best not to crowd Tara all the time. “Is Buffy even up yet?”



“I don’t think so.” Dawn shook her head. “But I’ll go jump on her.” She hurried off and then reappeared briefly. “That was a yes I want to go by the way.” She explained before dashing off again.



Willow laughed as the teenager darted away before turning back to her girlfriend.



“Are you sure?” She checked in a soft voice. “Though if you don’t go I could bring you home a present.”



“If you’re sure I’m sure.” Tara pointed out though she felt a little guilty inside for almost wanting Willow to leave. She just needed a little time alone to think and get her head together.



“I’ll bring you home the best present.” Willow leaned forward and kissed Tara’s forehead.



“You don’t have to stay out long, come home whenever you like.” Tara pointed out quickly tipping her head up for the affection.



“Do you want lunch brought back?” The redhead questioned thinking that was what Tara was hinting at.



“That would be nice, something with cheese and lettuce.” The blonde smiled lovingly.



“Oh I know just want you’re craving, the Super Salad Bar’s speciality mix.” Willow beamed.



“Something I have a thing about huh?” Tara smirked as the name sparked a slight feeling of familiarity.



“You had a little frequent purchaser card.” The redhead giggled. “I’ll get them to start you a new one.”



“Perfect.” Tara giggled at the idea that she had a frequent buyer card for a salad bar. “Willow?” She said after a moment as the redhead moved back slightly.



“Yes love?” Willow stopped.



“I love you.” She said seriously.



“I love you too.” Willow leaned forward and hugged her. “More than anything.”



“More than anything.” Tara echoed holding on possibly too tightly.



***



till the next update... thank you all for reading

kathleen and beth

Edited by: Repost Moderator at: 2/23/03 11:47:02 pm

[Urn of Osiris]

Ahhh your back.



It seems like it's been forever.



I'm all stocked up for the angst. Bring it on!

Urn of Osiris
_________________**

"Ninety-nine percent of the failures come from people who have the habit of making excuses."
— George Washington Carver "Bite me Harris." Anya Beneath you
Voice your opinion about Tara http://www.petitiononline.com/Tara/petition.html

Edited by: Urn of Osiris  at: 10/11/02 5:45:47 am

[saule77]

Yay!!! The Rainbow Writers are back!!!

Take as long as you need... As you said, we're patient...



Nice scene. Can't wait for more!



Look what you've done... You've made me all excited and bouncy!

"You are Willow Rosenberg, vixen-y lighter of the flame and keeper of my heart.”

(Camp Flutie by Rane)

[WiccansIllusion]

And yet another good thing to help the fact I had to get up four hours earlier, and then go to work at 3 again. Thank ya ladies, glad to see everyone's alright on your ends.

Tara nodded in agreement "She has magic fingers." TheWisdom of War, Chris Golden

" When things get ruffy, he hides behind his Buffy" Anya Once more with Bitterness- er....Feeling.

[barnabasvamp]

Kathleen and Beth;

Hope you both had excellent R&R and so glad your back!



Great start, will be waiting....

BV

"In front of total strangers won't you kiss me, Flowers for no reason but you miss me - OOH, I wanna be in love"

Melissa Etheridge-Skin

[Grimaldi]

yay a new episode looking forward to the next part

Dude, we're surrounded by perverts!

2nd place??? That's just a fancy term for loser!

Screw you triangle thief!

[little wicca dude]

yay and big woo hoo

a new update



cant wait 4 more, glad u guys had a good break



luv jill xx

"Of all the Charlie Browns, ours is the Charlie Browniest!"

My Scooby Page

[Grimlock72]

Hmm... Tara home without Willow and those diaries still lying around. Why does this not sound like a good idea ? I wonder if Dawn still thinks Willow shouldn't tell Tara about their past troubles... (bad idea really). I want Willow to tell Tara in person damn it, have her at least get that part right.



Ah well, guess I'll have to wait for more updates then . I *can* be patient, honest... I can...



Grimmy

"Why w-w-would anyone leave Willow?" It was a concept Tara just could not grasp. -- I Dream of Thee by Jomarch

Edited by: Grimlock72 at: 10/13/02 2:32:37 pm

[MissQuirky]

YAY!! The new eppy! Starting off very good! A wonderful lil morning. Some nice shopping and Tara helping Xander out could be good they usually don't hang out much. Can't wait 4 more!



~Ashley~

Willow: We can come by between classes. Usually I use that time to copy over my class notes with a system of different colored pens. But it's been pointed out to me that that's, you know... insane.
Tara: I said quirky.

[Wolflord]

Whoo Hoo......the Rainbow writers are back in action. Glad you were able to get some R & R for yourselves....good for you. Take your time if you need it....we'll be here.







Good start....although I have a feeling I need to put the Angst Helmet and safety gear on now. I thought it was sad that Tara wanted Willow to leave....although I can understand her point. After all doesn't absence make the heart grow fonder? Although I have a bad feeling at what Tara is going to be doing to occupy herself while Willow is gone....damn diaries. Well keep up the good work.



_______________ WOLFLORD ___________________

Sometimes I think of them doing spells and I do a spell myself. Xander in Restless

[spazz07]

I'll add to the joy jumping that Kath and Beth are back on board I must say it seems forever but a RW's story is always worth the wait



As for the new part, it has me filled with worry already, like so many others i want Willow to be the one to tell Tara about her previous misdemeanours and not let her find out through the diaries Hopefully Tara doesn't get the chance while they're out to get to the bad parts before Willow can tell her herself As always, hoeplessly waiting for more



Cheers

Nath

Isn't it funny how you feel your most tired five minutes before you have to get up.

[The Rose24]

I am glad you ladies are back and bringing the excellent updates!!!!

Tara: My heart doesn't stutter.

Tara: Willow, I got so lost.
Willow: I found you. I will always find you.

Willow: Hi, um Tara. I was wondering maybe you want to go out some time for coffee? food? Kisses and gay love?

[katydid]

Woo hoo...its back. Can't wait to read what you have in store for us.



Katie

--------------
She practically had genuine molded plastic stamped on her ass.

[mocha fiend 22]

there back! there back! oh yay! ok ill stop shouting im waking the neighbor. cant wait for the next up date

The word "gulp" comes to mind.

[Miss1234Kitty]

Yay yay yay yay yay yay yay yay yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!







Hi RW's! Sorry, am now very hyper as have drunk lots of coca cola and come online for updates - not a good combination! I'm very glad that you're back, and don't worry if there's infrequency between the updates. I think you can probably tell from the replies that this one will keep all kittens happy until the end of the month or longer.



Gem

Tara: There's just so much to work through... and can you just be kissing me now?

[bulldog tidnab]

oh yay! you guys(gals) are back! take your time with updates. I think I speak for many a kitten when I say we would wait any amount of time for any of your fics.



*woof*

I will go put some clothes on, ok.




Oh sweet Cheez-Its yes!

[KathleenWolf]

hi everyone,



well lots of love to everyone who is so happy to see us and is vowing they patience as we are a little slow with updates... I had actually hoped to update over the weekend but then I forgot all my edit discs at work so... I made sure that first thing this morning I pushed the big pile of work over to the side on my desk and got a post out...



thanks for reading

kath and beth



oh and a belated happy thanksgiving to all the Canadian Kittens







***



“Buffy! BUFFFFFYYYYY!” Dawn yelled but she made sure to make her call light and not worrisome as she jogged down the stairs. She’d flittered from room to room having not yet found her sister and it was starting to concern her a bit. A check of the main floor gave her nothing so she reluctantly crept down the open basement door towards Xander’s territory.



“Mmmm.” A light indistinguishable moan came from under the covers on Xander’s bed.



“Sorry Mads, but have you seen Buf...” Dawn began but her words stopped as she paused at the bottom steps into the basement.



“Dawn?” Buffy sat up scratching at her head as she yawned. As she sat up the blanket pulled up showing the Spellcaster still asleep beside the Slayer. “It’s early.”



“Buffy?” The teenager squeaked as she looked at the two of them. “What are you doing?” She turned slightly and stared at the sleeping Spellcaster. “Oh God! You make me sick!” She announced suddenly turning and stomping up the stairs.



“Dawn?” Madalene was finally awakened by the girl’s horrified condemnation though she didn’t quite catch all the words. “What’s going on?” She looked at Buffy.



“I’m not sure I know.” The Slayer admitted as she struggled up and out of the bed. “I’d better go and find out though. Dawn! Dawn!” Buffy called as she hurried up into the kitchen trying to slow her sister down.



“Don’t talk to me, you’re disgusting!” Dawn stomped her way around the landing on her way to the second set of stairs.



“Will you please just stay still and let me explain.” Buffy was gaining ground on the teenager though she wasn’t sure exactly what she was going to be explaining.



“Explain what?” Dawn turned her hands on her hips. “That you have nothing better to do that stalk Madalene now that Willow is okay. Have her be another notch for your belt.”



“Stalk Madalene?” Buffy stopped too with a hard frown. “A notch in what belt?”



“I’m not a child Buffy, I know about these things.” Dawn glared at her sister.



“Wait.” Buffy finally felt her brain slip into gear. “You don’t think...” She stopped and glanced over her shoulder back down the stairs.



“How could you? She doesn’t really know who she is, she’s here trying to help us and you repay her by taking advantage of the situation?” Dawn kept condemning her.



“You really think I would do that?” Buffy frowned harder as a dark horrible feeling sunk into her as Dawn’s accusations hit home.



“You were in bed with her.” Dawn pointed over the railing.



“Fully clothed.” Buffy pointed out quickly



“Cuddled up together.” Dawn felt a little of her anger calm a bit as she realised they had been in clothes.



“It’s cold in the basement, we should buy one of those miniature heater things.” Buffy thought her tension softening.



“So you didn’t?” Dawn stepped down one stair towards the Slayer.



“No Dawn, I didn’t. Why would you think I did?” She asked honestly interested.



“Because...” Dawn slipped down to sit on the stair. “She’s beautiful and intelligent and you spend lots of time with her.”



“I spend a lot of time with her because she’s my friend, you spend a lot of time with her too and no one would think you wanted to date her.” Buffy tried to reason.



“I’m only sixteen I can’t date her.” Dawn squeaked at her sister.



“See how dumb it sounds?” Buffy laughed softly and reached out to touch her sister’s arm.



“You don’t like her? Like, like-like her?” Dawn looked into her sister’s eyes.



“No!” Buffy laughed and exclaimed. “Dawn, I think Riley and Angel and well, others, kinda prove my straight preference.”



“But Willow was with Oz now she’s with Tara, it’s not a one or the other forever thing.” Dawn reasoned logically. “And she makes you happy.” She pointed out not sure why after being upset earlier she was now trying to prove the merits of this to Buffy.



“She’s a friend Dawn, I need friends right now more than anything else. To be honest I don’t think any love interest is what I need.” A hard shiver ran through her as she thought of Spike and the parting memory of him in the bathroom upstairs. She felt the colour blanch from her cheeks



“Oh... sorry.” Dawn offered feeling bad for freaking out now. “Um... I was coming to see if you wanted to go shopping with Willow and me. She’s all excited about getting out in the big wide world.”



“So you don’t feel like the odd one out with her and Tara?” Buffy forced herself to relax a little trying a smile.



“No, Tara wants to stay at home and rest.” Dawn shook her head. “It would just be us three.”



“Is Tara okay?” Buffy felt the worry creep in again.



“I think she’s just tired after last nights commotion.” Dawn admitted.



“You should run down and ask Mads to keep an eye on her for us. I need to wash and change.” Buffy gave her vote to go shopping.



“Okay.” Dawn smiled at her sister. “I’m sorry I snapped at you.” She reached up and hugged Buffy.



“No problem.” Buffy held her sister softly for a moment.



“You know if you are looking for someone...” Dawn grinned as she moved downstairs. “You could do worse than Mads.”



“Funny girl!” Buffy called shaking her head gently.



“That’s if she’d even have you.” Dawn giggled as she went into the basement.



“BEAST!” Buffy’s voice just about carried down to reach her.



***

"I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine."

To The Land of The RainbowWriters

[Urn of Osiris]

Oh so good. I think B and M could be very interesting. Damn the RW's for making me like Buffy. Not literall damned.



So lets dive into the journals. **cough soon cough**



Ohh I've missed your story. It's wonderful to have it back.

Urn of Osiris
_________________**

"If you see someone without a smile, give them one of yours!" My 5 year old

[saule77]

Ah, the joy of having sisters !!! The bantering, the teasing, the fighting, the hair-pulling…

I’m actually glad nothing is going on between Buffy and Mads. I tend to prefer my “straight in canon” characters to remain straight for some reason… But it was interesting that Dawn raised the issue…



Did I mention how glad I am the two of you are back?



edited cause my English grammar has just gone out of the window...

"You are Willow Rosenberg, vixen-y lighter of the flame and keeper of my heart.”

(Camp Flutie by Rane)

Edited by: saule77 at: 10/15/02 9:47:51 am

[mocha fiend 22]

yay!!! update... good update...Dawnie moods change so quick its odd but hey that's Dawn right

The word "gulp" comes to mind.

[Grimaldi]

cool update

Dude, we're surrounded by perverts!

2nd place??? That's just a fancy term for loser!

Screw you triangle thief!

[chronic]

Its good to see you two back in action, i've been missing my rainbow writers fix.



I wonder what Mads' reaction will be when she hears about Dawn's assumption?



looking forward to the next update

-----------------------------------------------------------
"Kiss rocks? Why would anyone wanna kiss... Oh, wait, I get it"
- Willow, Band Candy

[barnabasvamp]

I have definitely missed this story.



Tara staying home, things going on, *grabs tissues and 1 chocolate bar-for now and heads back to computer*



Can hardly wait to see where this ride is taking us.

BV

"In front of total strangers won't you kiss me, Flowers for no reason but you miss me - OOH, I wanna be in love"

Melissa Etheridge-Skin

[tiredsoul]

Great to see you back. I've missed my fix as well.



Great start. Ah, the memories of living with my sister **shiver** Okay, not so fond memories ....



--celia

---------------------------------

"That was just rude. Now I forget what I was saying."

[Pixie gishmock]

Woo hoo!!!!



I really liked Dawn's reaction. You've already heard all my thoughts on the subject.





Hugs, food, meds, and lots of love!

Life is full of changes...The better you are at letting go of things, the freer your hands will be to catch something new. ~from Off The Map by Joan Ackerman
"It's good to be a chicken casserole," Tara murmured before passing out. ~from "Answering Darkness" by Sassette

[Grimlock72]

Errr.... now where the heck did Dawn's reaction come from ? It's not like she hates lesbians now is it ? As for the "I am not a child" part... keep on saying that and you might actually believe it yourself.



Then again I've never liked Dawn so I might be a tiiiiiiiiiiny bit biased .



bit confused but happilly waiting for more updates...



Grimmy

"You hurt Tara," Willow said too calmly. "The last one who tried that was a god. I made her regret it." -- Unexpected Consequences by Lisa of Nine

[Kalita]

Hm. That's an... interesting... response from Dawn. I know, teenager, entitled to it... still.



But, hey, the subject is broached! I can remain somewhat hopeful.

"Numfar... Do the dance of shame."

[The Rose24]

Nice update. Tara should rest.

Tara: My heart doesn't stutter.

Tara: Willow, I got so lost.
Willow: I found you. I will always find you.

Willow: Hi, um Tara. I was wondering maybe you want to go out some time for coffee? food? Kisses and gay love?

[spazz07]

Tee hee, i'm not sure abot the others but i loved Dawn's reaction to the whole B/M situation. She's all mad and upset before she gets a chance to think about it, and then when she does, she kinda likes the idea. Plus i love how she baited Buffy at the end, leaving the question lingering in Buffy's head if she'd be good enuf... if she were to slide that way of course.



Cheers

Nath

Isn't it funny how you feel your most tired five minutes before you have to get up.

[KathleenWolf]

Hi Everyone,



Just me dipping in with another update.... oh and angst warning to everyone... it's about the already scary journals!!!







***



The Summers’ house was silent as the Spellcaster made her way upstairs. The happy trio of women had left to go shopping and Xander had even phoned to say he’d be by in an hour or so after picking up building supplies to fix the front window. Being the only two left, Madalene wanted to check on her cousin and having made it down the hall without hearing a noise she poked her head around the doorway of Tara’s room.



“I’m going to go do my meditation now that the shopping crew is off. Do you want anything?” She smiled at the blonde.



“No, I’m kinda having a bedroom day.” Tara admitted motioning to her position sat crossed legged on the bed.



“I can make you lemonade or something though.” Madalene came into the room a bit.



“I don’t want to put you to any trouble.” Tara said softly.



“Please, it’s my pleasure.” Madalene smiled at her cousin.



“I don’t know if I did before, but I love lemonade now.” Tara let herself smile softly.



“I like to think it’s because I’m a master at making it.” The Spellcaster laughed. “So what are these?” She glanced at the books piled up next to Tara on the bed.



“What?” Tara looked to where the Spellcaster was looking having completely forgotten what she had out on the bed. “Oh they’re books, just books.” Moving her hand too quickly Tara caught one and knocked the pile spreading them over the comforter.



“Are you okay?” Madalene saw how flustered the blonde was suddenly as the books sprayed out.



“I...” Briefly Tara considered lying to her cousin but as she caught the Spellcaster’s eyes she knew she couldn’t. Sadly she shook her head and picked up a soft rainbow coloured book. In her preliminary sort Tara had worked out that this had been the first of her journals. Silently she handed it to Madalene.



Madalene took it and flipped it tentatively open to the first page seeing a picture of Willow and Tara before she flipped to the next and saw a full page of fluid handwriting.



“Journal?” She surmised softly.



Tara leaned forward and eased the first page back again. Like it had when she opened it, the first wafer thing page had stuck. Peeling it back a pretty decorated bookplate held the words:



“This book belongs to Tara Maclay.”



“Sweet Goddess.” Madalene took a staggered breath as she quickly counted the four other journals and a thought cleared in her head. “Your memories.”



“Anya kept them.” Tara nodded pulling her hand back.



“Have you read them?” The Spellcaster ran her finger over the words not reading just amazed by their existence.



“I was going to start.” She revealed shaking her head. “But I didn’t want Willow to be here.” She made the admission a bit ashamed.



“I can’t believe you have this.” Mads looked at the books again in awe. “I’ll make you lemonade.” She nodded feeling the importance of this.



“Would you...” Tara stopped what she was about to ask and let her eyes drop back to the books. “Yes thank you, lemonade would be nice.” She whispered instead.



“Would I what?” Madalene jumped immediately at the words.



“It’s just…” Tara looked up again as Madalene had answered so swiftly and so gently. “I don’t know if I can read them.”



“Do you want company?” Madalene offered softly.



“Would you?” Tara’s blue eyes brightened a little.



“Cousin, you could ask me to walk to Istanbul and get you a local sandwich and I’m sure I’d consider it.” The Spellcaster assured her. “Well you know I did come from Argentina this time alone so that would have been a good example also.”



“It’s just that, I have this strange feeling…” Tara looked at the books.



“Do you want me to read them too you?” Madalene could understand the blonde’s hesitation. “It took me three days to get the courage to read the note that was with me and it was only a page long.”



“I couldn’t ask you to...” Tara shook her head but her voice held no conviction.



“Why not? Do you not want me to know what’s in them?” Madalene didn’t mean any malice just wanted to clear up any worry. “I won’t tell anyone anything Tara, I promise you.”



“No, no it’s not that.” Tara shook her head and paused. “Would you read them to me, please.” She held out the first one again



“Okay.” Madalene took it and pushing the over a little moved up to sit beside her.

“This book belongs to Tara Maclay...” She began reaching down and slipping her hand into her cousin’s.



“I know that it will be hard to ever forget the things that I have been through but I never ever want to forget again all the beauty in my life that I almost lost because of Glorificus. I guess that is the best place to start... Glorificus as everyone knows now is a Hell God ... though maybe I should start back a bit further... it was a normal day until I finally got the courage to mention to Willow the fears that were playing in my mind about her growing powers...”



The world seemed to shift a little for the cousins as Madalene’s voice went on. A scene of a room, most probably a university dorm room filled out around them.



Clad in denim, Tara sat on the edge of a bed, talking at length with a shorthaired Willow.



“Oh, but you’re way beyond me there! In just a few… I mean ... it frightens me how powerful you’re getting.” Tara pointed out to her lover, not truly expecting the look she received in return.



“That’s a weird word.” Willow’s eyes were hard and her frown pronounced.



“Getting?” Tara tried to bluff with a nervous smile.



“It frightens you, *I* frighten you.” Willow clearly pointed out exactly what part of Tara’s praising she was referring to.



“That is *so* not what I meant. I meant I-impresses - impressive.” The words tumbled from Tara mouth as she shot up off the bed, shaking her head.



“But it was what I meant…” Tara’s narrative voice took over from the point but the scene played on for the two cousins who were both present but at the same time merely observers.

“But soon none of that would matter or wouldn’t be important at any rate.” The narration went on.



“What wouldn’t matter?” Madalene held the book to her as she looked around the unfamiliar room.



“Any of it.” Tara’s voice changed slightly as the Wicca moved from her place next to Madalene, uncrossing her legs and stepping off from the bed she shared with her cousin directly into the scene. Her white-socked feet treading silently on the door room floor.



“Tara, should you be...” Madalene watched her move. She was surprised when nothing seem to stop even though Tara stood up.



“Everything changed about an hour after this or maybe a little longer.” Tara walked across the room her hand catching hold of the closet door that hung slightly open from Willow’s hasty and angered retreat from the room.



“How? What changed it?” Madalene slowly pushed off the bed and stood up almost afraid the floor wouldn’t hold her. Her body felt light and tingly, almost that strange feeling that came a moment or two before your limb went numb when you sat on it funny.



“Glory.” Tara whispered the name, her blue eyes instantly haunted by the name.



At the prompting Mads moved her eyes down to the text of the journal again.



“It was supposed to be a simple day... just a sunny day in the middle of the week and then she was there.” Madalene whispered almost feeling pain in the words as the world shifted again and she was sitting on a bench with Tara.



Balloons and paper lanterns hung from trees. People walked around, some in costume, some holding carnival prizes. Cheerleaders waved pom-poms and chanted in order. A group of Chinese men danced, holding a large paper dragon aloft as they moved through the crowds. Flags of many nations hung from wires above the masses around them.

Madalene looked up to see a blonde in a red slip dress walking towards them a feral look on her face.



“Tara, we have to get out of here.” Madalene felt a sickly wave pass into her body and she grabbed the blonde’s hand trying to pull her.



But Tara remained seated as the woman slipped in unnoticed to sit beside her sliding her hand across the bench she slowly threaded her fingers into Tara’s, squeezing them softly when her hand was fully in place. A soft beautiful smile crossed Tara’s face as she looked down at the hands.



“I thought it would be Willow.” Tara whispered turning her head to glance at Madalene.



“Its not.” Madalene stood up alarmed and quickly she looked down into the book.



“I didn’t have a choice, I couldn’t, I wouldn’t give up Dawn to Glory’s horrible desires. I couldn’t let anyone be hurt, so I just sat there. I just sat through the pain and the agony.” She read on as best as she could as she heard her cousin yelp in pain. “I knew some part of me believe Buffy would come and save me, or Willow... Willow would just somehow know I was in trouble and make it all stop. But neither of them came and then it went dark.”



Madalene shivered as the narration continued and the world started to dim around them.



“The days I was lost there in Glory’s madness, I do not wish to recount here. Maybe I will, in a separate place and maybe when I do, the images and memories of that time will cease to haunt my mind.”



“But for here and now I will put only this. I recall every moment, every hour of every day that I spent there. Insane maybe, but like looking through a dirty window, everything that went on around me I saw, I felt and I bleed for.”



“Tara we should stop this, whatever this is.” Madalene looked up at the scene changed fully and they were encased in a dark night at the base of a tall strange metal structure looming nearby. Forcefully she shut the book in her hands and breathed out as the world spun again.



***

"I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine."

To The Land of The RainbowWriters