I have no idea what happened to my computer. I've been trying it for days and nothing worked and then all of sudden it did. Don't you just love it when that happens.
The good news is that I can post the update now.
Hope you all enjoy it.
Day 5b
Tara sat at the table unable to think of anything, but her earlier phone conversation with Willow. She knew things were moving way too fast, well not things exactly, but feelings. The feelings were moving way too fast. She had this little voice in the back of her head that kept telling her it wasn’t real, things like this don’t really happen, but all Tara wanted to do was shut that little voice up because she wanted to believe it was real. And why shouldn’t she believe that, after all she’d been through enough, didn’t she deserve this little bit of happiness? Willow made her so happy. Just thinking about the cute redhead put a smile on her face. She couldn’t help but daydream about the day when she would finally meet Willow face to face, hold her in arms and just kiss her for a million years. Tara let her mind drift back to the phone call when Willow had said she thought she was in love with her, Tara sighed and couldn’t stop the smile from erupting.
“Are you ever gonna get up and dance?” Marie asked, wiping her brow as she plopped down next to Tara and sipped her drink.
“No,” Tara said still smiling.
“You’re seriously just gonna sit here all night?”
“No, not all night, at some point I’m going to get up and go home,” Tara said looking at her friend.
“There’s something you’re not telling me, I can tell,” Marie said staring intently at Tara. Lately she had been smiling non stop, and sometimes it looked like Tara was just off in lala land. “You met someone didn’t you? So who is it? What’s he look like?”
“I didn’t,” Tara said denying it rather than confront the truth. She wasn’t ashamed of being gay she just liked to keep her private life… private.
“You so did,” Marie said shaking her head disapprovingly. “You have to tell me about him, and then you have to tell me where you met him so that I can go meet someone too.”
Tara paused looking at her friend. It suddenly hit her that if Marie really was her friend telling her the truth shouldn’t matter. It wasn’t like she had ever said she liked men, that was just something Marie had assumed that Tara had never corrected.
“Okay, I did meet someone,” Tara confessed.
“I knew it, so spill.”
“I will, but keep an open mind, okay? This might be a little bit of shock,” Tara said watching Marie’s face scrunch up in confusion. “The person I met is a woman, I’m gay.”
“Oh… I just always thought… cause you’re so pretty and everything,” Marie said as if those thoughts had come out completely and Tara was able to understand.
“I’m pretty so I’m straight?” Tara asked.
“No… well… yeah,” Marie said. “ I just, I don’t know. I guess I just thought attractive lesbians were only something you see on television. I didn’t think they were real.”
“Okay… I think,” Tara said.
“I’m totally okay with it,” Marie said quickly, “I just, you know, never thought you were, but it’s cool that are. So where did you meet this girl?”
“Really?” Tara asked skeptically.
“Yeah, really, maybe she has a brother,” Marie smiled.
“She doesn’t, only child,” Tara said, “Ummm… also she lives in Southern California.”
“When did you go there?”
“I didn’t… we… we met online,” Tara said uncertainly.
“That’s something I’ve never tried,” Marie said, “you’ll have to let me know how it works out cause if it’s good I’m not too proud try it.”
“I will,” Tara said smiling at her friend, her actual friend who knew everything and still wanted to be friends.
“Okay, I’m dancing, come with me,” Marie said pleading with her friend.
“No way, I do not dance,” Tara said, ready to defend herself more when her phone vibrated, “Saved by the bell,” she said holding up the phone. Marie walked off back to the crowded dance floor. “Hello,” Tara said, her finger stuffed in her other ear.
“Hi… is this Tara… the… one… my… mom… talks… to,” Taylor asked crying.
“Yes, Taylor is that you?”
“Yes… I … need… my… Mommy,” Taylor cried.
“Your Mom isn’t with me, sweetie,” Tara said wondering how Taylor even got her number, and how Willow would feel knowing that her daughter had called her.
“I… know… she’s with… Buffy. But… I… don’t feel… good, and … I want … her to… come… get me.”
“I bet your grandma and grandpa could call her for you,” Tara said.
“No… they said… I just need… to… to… to rest.”
“They’re probably right, maybe you should lay down and try to sleep,” Tara was totally stumped at how to handle this particular situation.
“I am, but… I need… my Mommy… please call her,” Taylor pleaded as she continued to cry.
“I can do that, but I’m gonna need to hang up so I can call her, okay?”
“NOOOO… don’t… hang up.”
“Honey, I can’t call without hanging up,” Tara said scanning the dance floor for Marie.
“Please… don’t… hang… up,” Taylor begged.
“Okay, okay… no hanging up,” Tara said, biting her lower lip she tried to think of a way to call Willow without hanging up on Taylor. “Okay, I’m gonna go find another phone to call your Mom on.”
“And she’ll… come… and get… me?”
“I can’t promise that, but I can promise that she loves you and if she thinks you really need her, I know she’ll come get you.”
“Grandma says I don’t need… her,” Taylor said getting her tears more under control now that Tara was going to call her mom.
“I know that when I don’t feel good I always want my Mom, and I’m a grown up,” Tara said trying to comfort the little girl.
“You do?”
“Oh yeah, everyone does.”
“Does she come and get you?” Taylor asked.
“No… my mom… well… How do I say this?” Tara said.
“She died,” Taylor said knowing that sometimes those things happened, because it happened to Buffy.
“Yeah, but it doesn’t stop me from needing her, and when I need her I always think of her in my mind and I remember her holding me and telling me that everything is gonna be okay, and she would sing this song to me every time I was sick and it would always make me feel better. Does your Mom have a something special she does with you when you don’t feel good?”
“She sings me a silly song,” Taylor said smiling for the first time all night, “and she acts really silly too.”
“I think that would make me feel better too,” Tara said. “I found a phone so I’m gonna call your Mom now, but I’m not hanging up okay?”
“It’s okay, Tara, I feel better now.”
“You do?”
“Yeah, I think I feeled bad cause I missed my Mommy so much that it made my heart hurt, and that made my tummy hurt, but you made my heart feel all better. Now I know why my Mommy loves you so much. Can you come to my house and play with me sometime?”
“Yeah,” Tara said, trying not to cry. Kids could just be so darn wonderful, “I’ll come play with you sometime, I don’t know when I’ll be able to, but I’ll come, I promise.”
“And you always keep your promises right?” Taylor said.
“Always,” Tara smiled.
“I’m tired now okay, so I’m gonna go to bed. If you talk to my Mommy tell her I miss her and I love her and I want her to come back soon.”
“I will sweetie; you try and get some good rest.”
“Okay Tara, I love you.”
“I love you too, goodnight and sweet dreams.”
“Yeah, and don’t let the bed bugs bite,” Taylor giggled hanging up the phone.
Tara hung up her phone, and walked back over to the table. Marie had returned again for more of her drink, and had found the table empty.
“Don’t tell me you actually danced?” Marie said.
“No, phone call, remember?”
“Yeah, but I didn’t know you had to leave the table for a phone call,” Marie said winking, “It must have been your mystery woman.”
“No… it was her four year old daughter,” Tara said.
“Get out now… you do not want the complication of a child, trust me, I’ve been there and done that.”
“Taylor is not a complication, not to me anyway. She’s a very sweet little girl.”
“For now,” Marie said. “Just wait until she gets a little older and you’ll see what I’m talking about. Always trying to get in the middle because they don’t think they’re getting enough attention, so then it turns into a battle. Who can get the most attention, and trust me, you’ll lose. The kid always wins that fight.”
“Good, because they should,” Tara said. “I don’t think I could ever be with someone who put me first over their child. I want to be a Mom, and I know that no matter how much I love the person I’m with, when I have our baby, that baby comes first.”
“Ugh… you’re so sappy,” Marie said. “I guess you still believe in true love and all that jazz too.”
“Of course I do,” Tara said, “I’m going to get the fairy tale.”
“Know what? I think you really will,” Marie said.
The scene at the beach could only be referred to as complete chaos. There was a large bonfire centered between thirty to forty tents. Around the bonfire a large group of people were gathered dancing to absurdly loud music blaring from large speakers placed in the bed of a pick up truck. Other people were hunkering in the shadows using the dark, and the loud music as a cover for their illicit goings on. And despite the late hour and the crispness in the air several people were splashing around in the surf. A red head emerged from the water clad only in a pink and green bikini turning heads as she made her way back to her tent. She laughed as she watched the tent next door rock, threatening to lose its grip on the sand.
Willow ducked into her tent searching for a pair of shorts to throw on over her bikini bottoms. As she searched for just the right pair she came across her cell phone. She had been wanting to call Tara all night, but she didn’t want to call her while the blond was at the club. Willow didn’t like the thought of having to compete for Tara’s attention. On the other hand it was midnight and Willow was dying to talk to her girl. Putting the search for the shorts on hold she dialed Tara’s number.
“Hello.”
“Hi, it’s me… Willow.”
“I know,” Tara said giggling. “Didn’t I tell you to call my cell tonight?”
“Oh…yeah… I kinda just dialed on reflex,” Willow said. “I guess it’s my lucky day since you’re home.”
“It seems that way,” Tara said so glad to be talking to Willow she almost forgot she had something to tell her. “Oh… I almost forgot. Taylor called me earlier.”
“She did? How did she even get your number? Was something wrong?”
“She missed you,” Tara said. “I can relate to that. I talked to her and told her I’d call you, but before I could she was feeling better and she just wanted to go to sleep. I did call you though. I left a message, did you get it?”
“No, but then again I didn’t check them either,” Willow admitted. “She is okay though?”
“Yeah, she was fine, I promise.”
“I trust you, but I think I’ll call first thing tomorrow just to check on her. She usually doesn’t get that way when I go. She loves staying with my mother and father.”
“Do you go away often?” Tara asked trying to sound nonchalant.
“Do I detect a hint of jealousy?” Willow asked coyly.
“Maybe.”
“No, I don’t go places often, and you don’t need to worry about me, I’m yours.”
“Mine?” Tara questioned hopefully.
“All yours,” Willow replied.
“That works out perfectly cause I’m all yours,” Tara said.
“Are you sure? Cause you did go out tonight, getting your groove on at the club. You didn’t meet anyone did you?”
“Oh, that was nothing. Just a quickie in the bathroom.”
“WHAT!!!!”
“Willow, I’m kidding I swear,” Tara said laughing. “There is only, and always will be only you.”
“That was so not funny.”
“Not even a little?”
“Well yeah, if I was the one teasing you,” Willow said, “but my heart dropped right out of my chest.”
“I’m so sorry, I thought you would know I was teasing you. I didn’t mean to hurt you,” Tara said near tears.
“It’s okay, baby, I’m fine now, I promise. No more lost heart. I know exactly where it is. It’s in Seattle with you.”
“How is it possible to love someone so much?” Tara asked.
“Well it’s incredibly easy. I mean, let’s face it, I’m an unbelievable catch. It’s not every day you meet someone with charm, personality, beauty, and just the right amount of geek to balance it all out.”
“Don’t forget your humbleness,” Tara said.
“That’s right, I don’t know how I could have possibly left that out,” Willow giggled.
“I don’t know, though, I haven’t seen any geek yet.”
“It’s there,” Willow said. “My brain houses an extraordinary amount of useless facts and trivia. There’s a whole chunk dedicated to star trek tng, and I can’t forgot the whole Xena section, and there’s also a bunch of school stuff still in there, science, math, and computer stuff. I’m sure something will come flying out of one of those places sometime. It always does.”
“Well then you can consider me a geek too. I love Xena and in my opinion tng the best of the star trek spin offs,” Tara said.
“Really? Me too,” Willow said excitedly. “When you come or I come, I’ll have to make sure I have all my tng dvd’s. We could have a marathon.”
“Speaking of coming.”
“Ummm… were we speaking of that. Cause I’m pretty sure that our conversation was totally rated G,” Willow said.
“No… not… well you know, but me or you coming to visit the other,” Tara said trying hard not to laugh at Willow’s mistake. Tara felt certain that Willow’s thoughts about her were not always as mild as she had originally thought. It was nice knowing that she wasn’t the only one having some xxx rated dreams.
“Now I’m embarrassed,” Willow said. “Okay, I’m moving on and acting like I never said it, so visiting, yes that sounds wonderful.”
“Yes it does, but how are we going to do it?”
“Well… I wouldn’t be able to for at least a few weeks. My mom and dad are going on a three week trip to Europe so I’d have no one to watch Taylor and I really don’t want to bring her with me, cause she’s no good on long road trips.”
“You wouldn’t fly?”
“Ugh… not unless I really had to, I’m a big baby about flying.”
“I can come to you, if you don’t mind that.”
“Why on earth would I mind that?” Willow asked.
“Well… I don’t know. Some people are weird about people coming to their house. Plus I didn’t know about meeting Taylor, if you’d want me to, you know?”
“I don’t really care about people coming to my house, because of Taylor, I figure anyone who knows anything about kids realizes that it’s nearly impossible to keep a house spotless with a preschooler, and you’ve talked to Taylor so she knows you exist, and obviously feels comfortable enough to call you when she can’t reach me, so I’d say there’s no real point in you not meeting her. I think it’s really great that she likes you so much. She’s not like that with everybody. She’s terrified of Xander’s girlfriend and she’s known her since she was born. I’m excited to have you come here and get to meet everybody and of course to be able to hug you and touch you and kiss you, if you want me to that is.”
“Oh I want you to,” Tara said a bit too eagerly.
“Yay,” Willow said. “Do you know when you might be able to come here?”
“Not for sure or anything. I have to check my schedule at work. Every now and then I have home visits scheduled on the weekend. And I also have to find someone to check in on Miss. Kitty for me, “Tara said. “My tummies all fluttery right now thinking about seeing you.”
“I’m so excited I think I could jump right out of my bikini,” Willow said fidgeting wildly.
“Bikini?”
“I was swimming before I called,” Willow said.
“In a bikini?”
“Yes,” Willow giggled. “I needed a new swimsuit and was stupid enough to take Buffy with me and she talked me into buying this bikini, which I’m not one hundred percent comfortable in, but I think I look okay in it cause I’ve gotten a lot of compliments on it.”
“Compliments from who?” Tara asked slightly jealous.
“Just random people here. Hey, no worries, I don’t care how many boys whistle at me.”
“Of course you don’t you’re a lesbian,” Tara stated a bit sharply.
“Or girls,” Willow said. “You’re it for me, and if you need proof of that, I’ll model it for you when you come here.”
“Okay,” Tara said perking up.
“You really want me to model it?”
“Oh yeah,” Tara said. “It’s only fair, I showed you a little skin, remember?”
“I remember,” Willow said. “I still owe you for that, and not in a modeling a skimpy bikini kind of way either.”
“Are you a ‘don’t get mad, get even,’ person?” Tara asked.
“Yes.”
“I think I’m in trouble.”
“Yes, you are, but good trouble,” Willow said. “I’m not some big scary crazy person. No evilness here.”
“I beg to differ. You are flaunting the fact that you are in a skimpy bikini when you know I can’t see you. That’s evil if I’ve ever seen it.”
“It would only be evil if I weren’t going to show you, and I will show you someday. If you can be a good girl until then of course.”
“I can be good, but there isn’t much fun in that, now is there?” Tara said coyly. She loved flirting with Willow. It just came so naturally when talking to the red head.
“Okay, this conversation is definitely bordering on spicy talk,” Willow said fanning herself with her unused hand. “I think I need another dip in the cold ocean.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Tara giggled.
“Really? Let me see if I can explain it… being bad is fun, there’s nothing better than slipping out of a wet bathing suit and laying in the sun to dry off, especially laying there with someone else, bodies touching ever so lightly, glancing at the silhouette of her body out of the corner of your eye, smelling the faint scent of lavender in her blonde hair, thinking of all the things you’d like to do to her… “ Willow trailed off.
“Ummm… I get it now,” Tara said swallowing hard.
“I’m glad you understand,” Willow smirked. “Do you need a cold shower now?”
“Forget the shower, I need a plane ride to you,” Tara said before she could stop herself.
“My job here is done.”
“Not yet,” Tara said. “Did I say that out loud?”
“Yes,” Willow giggled. “I hope I can turn you on as much in person as I can on the phone.”
“You don’t have anything to worry about,” Tara admitted blushing.
“Really… are you having naughty dreams about me?” Willow asked boldly.
“I think I’ll plead the fifth on that, I’m blushing enough already.”
“You are too cute,” Willow said. “No pressure or anything, but I hope you come ASAP.”
“I’ll do my best,” Tara said. “I think I might need that cold shower.”
“I guess I should get back to my friends. I told them I’d just be a minute. I came back to the tent for some shorts. I’m gonna go get my dance on.”
“While you’re dancing you can picture water dripping off my wet, naked body. I’ll talk to you tomorrow, Willow.”
“Umm… yeah… naked… tomorrow,” Willow managed to squeak out.
“Sweet dreams, my love,” Tara said hanging up the phone. Pay back did feel pretty good.
by Zampsa1975 » Wed Jul 04, 2007 8:42 am 
Thanks for being so patient. 
Please update soon!
Hooked , I am soooo Hooked I cant wait for more and I really cant wait for them to meet in person this is wonderful. I love the fact that Tara wants to be a part of willows child's life that means the world to a child to be wanted and loved. 
And Tara's going to go and visit Willow which makes more sense, since she's the one without a child.
Quoting Willow, Irony is kind of ironic that way. Well, I hope that the problem gets fixed soon 'cause I am really anticipating this fic.