New Uber - Don't fear the Reaper (conclusion posted 12/20)

[Useful_Oxymoron]

Big Blue Eyes - Thank you! Glad you like it. Update in a few seconds.

Caz - Willow doesn't give up easily, thank god. And, yeah, Faith has to go through this too, though the emphasis will be kept on Willow and Tara's struggles for a bit.

Anne - Thank you, though, btw, I post on mondays here. Time-difference and all. Willow's sleuthing's earned her Tara's position and Tara's location. And not to worry about the end approaching. I don't know if I'll be able to keep it up forever, but I have plenty of ideas for adventures left for our girls to experience left. So the end is not neigh at all.

Those tiny frogs are really cute. I don't know how rational Willow's frog-fear is, but I tend to agree on the general cuteness factor of the little treefrogs.

WillowRulez - Glad to have made you laugh. But I hope the water didn't hurt your computer in any way. Yeah, Willow turning in a tenacious knowledge hound, while Tara's withdrawning from the world. Quite a difference in dealing, though I think Willow's method is, in the end, the healthiest.

I don't think anybody needs to know what kind of potato he or she is.

I'm afraid I can't give out the phone number, though. People who do give it out tend to, uh, disappear.

Dianneswillowtree - Yep. I'm a sucker for happy endings.

Viximon - Thanks for the Aw. I think Willow could bury the CIA with her sheer hacking expertise, just as she buried the homophobic websites.

Actually, Willow being able to see faith is a boo-boo on my part. Willow is only supposed to see Faith after she had removed the hood. So, no, Willow can't see Reapers who are cloaked. My mistake, sorry.

Willowlover - Thanks! Ubercameos are fun to do, almost as fun as rewriting the lives of the main characters. Yep, there'll be more W/T and B/F centric chapters in the near future.

Paul - Yeah, sorry about the doom and gloom at the beginning. It gets better.

Is it just me, or was anyone else a little disturbed that the Reapers start training their kids at the tender age of 4? Sure, it's the best time to start training them, but ... c'mon! When I was four ... um ... I think all I was doing was crashing into stuff and playing silly buggers for the most part.

Well, they don't actually start killing people or play around with souls, but young Reapers do get to play with cloaks. They start phasing in and out of reality through kindergarten games, which prepares them for later exersizes with actual cloaks. Tara and Faith were both four when they started their training.

At the time, Buffy didn't know about Willow and Tara's problem, so Willow had not choice. :(

Yes, it's not true love if it doesn't conjure images of Call of Cthulhu!

What, didn't you know Dagon used to be a fertility god before he got the fish people gig? And, uh, no horned robot demons. I think... I hope... Besides, Willow prefers Tara to horny robotic demons, I suspect.

As usual, Faith jumped the gun a little bit, but at least her intentions were pure.

Darla was fun to include, and Tara's password, well, Willow would have a hard time guessing if her passward was 8347FSF or something random like that.

See, it lines like these that make me like your writing so much.

Thank you. I love coming up with those lines too. They look great in my mind's eye. And, uh, not only because it involves Willow wearing only a nighty obviously, ahum. *cough*

Chris - Well, maybe Angel did. I was also heartbreaking for me to write Tara being in such pain, even though I knew thing'd be alright in the end. Weird that way, hm?

The thing I really liked about this part is that it allowed Willow to shine and show off her formidable smarts. And using that, she really did find her Tara, through rain and snow and gloom of night... Thanks, I like that image.

I felt I needed an appropriate countermeasure to a macabre painting like the Triumph of Death. It took some doing, but I eventually found one that was perfect to represent Tara's role.

All other questions will be answer in part 16.

Incidentally, probably just because I'm in Australia, the whole idea of being able to take a train to another country is really strange to me...)

Oddly enough, for me it's the other way around: it's hard to imagine not being able to travel to another country by train.

Taralicious - Thank you! I took me some doing to find the right sort of paintings. I wanted to try something of Hieronymus Bosch, but I couldn't find anything that fit, but that trail led me to Breughel, at least.
The photos were indeed a torture device. :( Poor Tara. And Frogger, well, yes, I admit to clocking quite a few hours with that damn frog. What kind of frog drowns in the river anyway?

Faith means well, but she sorta jumped the gun. Well, at least she admitted her mistake. Uh, kinda sorta But, yeah, she's about as subtle as an axe to the head.

I don't think Darla's actually wearing a schoolgirl uniform, but would you settle for a nice blazer and short skirt?

I loved writing that meeting-scene. And funny you should mention make-up sex.

The person she loves - Glad you like the story. Faith really cares about Tara and the other way around. Update will be posted soon.

Erin - Thanks! Glad you liked the story. Hope you class went fine.

[Useful_Oxymoron]

Part three of the 'coming out' sequence of Don't fear the Reaper. I'm not really happy with this one, but I think it's postable. A lot of Reaper lore in this one, though. Just a warning.

Title - Don't fear the Reaper.

Chapter 16 : The Voyage Home

Author name - Useful_Oxymoron

Email Address - Viernadevir@hotmail.com

Rating - PG-13. Humor about death isn't everybody's cup of tea.

Disclaimer - Well, I don't own Willow or Tara. If I did, I wouldn't have made certain... questionable decisions in the latter seasons. In any case, Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy own these characters and I don't intend to make any money off them.

Feedback- Is cool. It's always nice to know somebody liked the crap I write.

Summary- Now that Willow and Tara have met, Tara must hide her not-so-usual profession from Willow and her friends, while, at the same time, working to build a stable and loving relationship with the lovely Willow.

Notes- Influences for this story: The wonderful film The Frighteners (which everybody should see), lightly Dead Like Me, Terry Pratchett and the Blue Oyster Cult.

Italics are thoughts and, in this part, the other speaker during a phonecall.

[hr]
Chapter 16 : The Voyage Home.

It was amazing how everything seemed so much brighter now. Tara looked outside the window of her small kitchen and saw the lovely flowers outside, in the grassy fields amidst the retreating snow. How could she not have seen them before? The log cabin seemed to much more cozy and, dare she say it, romantic now. Willow's presence permeated her surroundings and her own being.

The hot chocolate she'd put on was nice and warm now, and she poured some into a cup. Tara made her way back to the tiny... no, cozy and romantic living room, where Willow was seated near the fireplace. The love of Tara's life was still shivering from cold, even though Tara had turned up the heat and threw some logs on the fire. Willow rubbed her hands while her feet were dipped in a bucket filled with hot water. Three blankets from Tara's bed were snugly wrapped around her body.

Tara put a chair next to Willow's, while the red-head's teeth were clattering. Willow gratefully took the hot chocolate and took a few sips.

"Oh, that hits the spot," Willow shivered. "I'm not built for this climate, Tara. I don't have enough body-fat... Uncle Hershel was right, I do need more meat on my bones." Tara let Willow lean into her and hoped to share some of her warmth. "You know," Willow said, "if I'd been born a walrus, I'd be just fine."

"I don't think the tusked look is really for you, sweetie," Tara replied.

"Yeah," Willow mused. "Tusks'd get into the way. I mean, I could only drink through a straw and it would make casual conversation with strangers very awkward. And you'd have to wear a face-guard when we kiss. But I sure could use me some of that blubber right about now. Uh, as long as it goes away again when I get warmer, cause there's not so much need for blubber in Sunnydale."

Oh, how I've missed that babble, Tara thought when she wrapped an arm around Willow's waist. "How did you find me, sweetie?"

It was a simple enough question, but Tara didn't expect the torrents of words spilling from Willow's mouth.

Well, actually she did expect it, it was just a bigger-than-average-babble. The Mother of All Babbles. The Babble to End All Babbles. Explanations, research, Death, trains and taxicabs were things she only heard shreds of. Instead, Tara concentrated on such things as 'missed you', 'love you so very much' and 'never want to be without you again, baby'. And then there was the odd story about Willow locking herself out of her hotel room, and having to wake the owners while she was only dressed in a flimsy nighty.

Tara found herself twirling a lock of Willow's unbelievably soft red hair around her finger while Willow continued. "...all I'm trying to say is, you don't run away from your problems. You sit down together and talk things over... Uh, which I sorta didn't do when I ran out, but I was really sorry and came back and..."

"I'm sorry," Tara couldn't meet Willow eyes. "I just... thought I messed up. I thought you hated me. So, I... went away."

"See, that's where you're a dummy," Tara first thought it to be a snippy remark, but that faded when she saw Willow's warm smile. "I could never hate you, Tara. You're my everything. And I don't give up easily. When there's a bug in my program, I bite right down into the code until I find it."

"So..."

"It's for real," Willow said, picking up on Tara's train of thought. "I want to work things out and I want you to come home. But you'll have to tell me everything, Tara. No more secrets."

"No more secrets," Tara promised.

Tara was amazed at the amount of 'top secret' Reaper lore Willow had been able to piece together through second-hand knowledge, historical legends, paintings and conspiracy nuts. It would be more than enough to make certain bigwigs at the Head Office very, very nervous. Then again, Willow was a very smart girl, so she felt she shouldn't be so surprised. Tara only had to correct one single, yet important aspect: "Deathbringer? Uh, that's not very accurate. We're called Reapers," Tara said.

Willow, who was finally starting to warm up a little, took another sip from her hot chocolate. "So I was right on everything else? Two groups of these Reapers? Hm... So, that answers the 'what' question, but that still leaves the 'how' and the 'why'."

Tara thought for a moment. "Alright, I think we'd have to start with the beginning to answer these questions. I'll tell you the history of the Reapers as it was taught to me in school."

"They have Reaper-courses in public schools?" Willow blinked. "Cause I never noticed that."

"They have in Reaper public schools," Tara smiled. "Anyway, all Reapers serve the Powers-That-Be... and before you ask, no I have no idea who they are or what they want. They just are. And they have plans for humanity which we just can't fathom. At the dawn of mankind, they gave the power of life and death to several mortals they found the most worthy to serve their cause. These were the Eight: Ankou, Anubis, Kali, Thanatos, Azri-Dahaka, Yama, Damballah and Mot."

"Those names I recognize," Willow said. "I guess they're not so Mythological as I thought."

"Mythology surrounding them sorta got carried away," Tara smiled. "They actually all lived in the same time-period and much beyond. The Powers blessed them with unnaturally long lives."

"But obviously something changed," Willow said. "Uh, unless you're planning to tell me that your real name is Kali and that you're six-thousand years old. Cause in that case you'd really be a nasty cradle-robber."

Tara chuckled. "No. No Kali here. I'm only twenty years old, sweetie. But you're right. Something did change. For almost a thousand years, the Eight ended lives of those whose time had come, and guided their souls to the appropriate afterlife."

"Wait!" Willow broke in. "There's an afterlife? For real?"

"Yeah, there are," Tara said. "There's actually 17 different planes, but most people either go to Elysia or the Abyss. I don't know what Elysia like, but I know it's eternal bliss."

"It's a nice idea that lovers really can be together forever," Willow whispered, squeezing Tara's hand slightly while laying her head on Tara's shoulder.

"It is," Tara whispered back. The lovers enjoyed each other's closeness for while.

"So what happened to the Eight?" Willow finally asked.

"The world's population was growing too fast and too big for them to keep up," Tara sighed. "Which is a problem of all ages for us Reapers. The Eight petitioned the Powers to be able to share their powers with other mortals that they found worthy. A large number of families were chosen and trained by the Eight. The powers that the Eight had were instilled in especially made cloaks and scythes. The Eight trained the families, and then passed beyond the veil themselves."

"So anyone can be a Reaper?" Willow asked.

Tara noticed that Willow was hanging from her lips and was impatiently waiting for her to continue. Her lover's thirst for knowledge was impressive... and impressively cute.

"Sadly, no," Tara said. "Or our problems would be over if everyone could, but not everybody can safely use the powers within our scythes and cloaks, uh, as you found out. But, to continue our tale, the families grew larger and eventually more families were chosen. The families did the bidding of the Powers in secret and ended the lives of the people whose time had come."

"I sense a 'but' coming up," Willow pursed her lips.

"But," Tara mouthed in an exaggerated matter, drawing a giggle from Willow, "again, the world's population continued to grow. Again, us Reapers couldn't keep up. So the Powers decided to restructure us. We were divided into two groups, the Collectors and the Harvesters. It was decided that, to save time, it was better to let most people die naturally. A Reaper would only come at the time of death to comfort the dying and collect the soul for processing. The Harvesters would take the role of the traditional Reaper, and end the lives of people whom the Powers wanted to remove to further their plans for the human race. Most of us, about three fifths, are Collectors. One fifth are Harvesters. The rest work at the Head Office, coordinating our actions."

"Wow," Willow sighed. "This is a lot to take in, Tara."

"I know," Tara smiled. "Now you know why I had to run out on you so many times. I'm so sorry about that, by the way."

"What happens if you're not there when a person dies?" Willow asked.

"Sometimes I do arrive too late. The soul simply floats above the body, waiting to be picked up. But if a Reaper takes too long, the soul could nestle in the place of death, especially if the soul was emotionally distressed at the time of death," Tara spoke grimly. This was not a subject that she particularly enjoyed to discuss. "If that happens, the site becomes a haunting. And then it gets really difficult, because the soul has to be convinced to let go. There's a special unit who deals with freeing these trapped souls, but they're chronically underfunded by the Head Office."

"You're one of these Collectors, right?" Willow asked. "It fits you," she continued.

Every fibre of Tara's being told her to quit while she was ahead, but she'd promised both Willow and herself to tell the whole truth and nothing but. "Yes," she started optimistically. "Collector Senior, Order of Anubis."

"Order of Anubis? Does that mean anything?" Willow frowned.

"Used to, couple of centuries ago. Now all it means is that all the local Anubians have an annual barbecue once a year. I can even bring a date," she winked. "Faith is a Harvester. Order of Dahaka."

Willow chuckled briefly and held out her hands to the fire. "Yeah, I can sorta see that. Buffy's very adventurous."

"Don't laugh," Tara gulped. "I... I w-wanted to be a H-harvester too. I got q-quite f-far into t-training too."

Willow looked deep into Tara's eyes and laid her hand on her lover's cheek. "Tara, baby," Willow started, having sensed Tara's nervousness. "You're not going to drive me away. I'm here to stay."

Just wait until you hear... Tara thought sadly, but found encouragement in Willow's words, but still had no idea how Willow'd react. "I was... a-assigned a case and... I was s-supposed to e-end her life. I, um, observed her for a w-w-week, but... I just couldn't do it. I... even ended up s-saving her life a few times. I just couldn't do it, because... I fell in love with her."

The last thing Tara saw before averting her eyes was the sight of Willow blanching. "W-who..." Willow whispered, but in her voice, Tara could hear she already knew the answer.

Silence fell into the cabin, save for the crackle of the fire and the wind howling past the windowpanes.

"Y-y-y-y-you," Tara whispered, her heart constricting with fear. Had she regained Willow just to lose her again?

A splash of water sounded as Willow rose from her chair, out of Tara's embrace and hugged the blanket around her. Tara looked up to see Willow pacing between the chair and the fireplace. Back and forth. Back and forth.

"A-are you f-freaked?" Tara asked.

"Uh, no, Tara, I'm not freaked, Tara. Do I look freaked, Tara? Cause, Tara, if I look freaked, Tara, it's not, Tara, because I'm non-freaked Willow, Tara. Yeah, Tara, that's me, Tara. 100% non-freaked Willow, Tara," Willow breathed. "I'm not hyperventilating, Tara, I swear, Tara."

Tara lowered her gaze. "Then... why do you keep s-saying my name, s-sweetie?"

"Well, uh, am I still on the d-deathlist, Tara?" Willow asked meekly.

"No," Tara smiled gently while locking eyes with Willow. "No, you're not. It's been taken care of."

When Willow visibly calmed down, Tara sat her back in the chair and gently told her everything that had happened that fateful week when... well, not when they had me, but when she had met Willow. How she had started enthusiastically, but felt the doubt in her heart. How she had come to care for the person whose life she was to end. How she had saved her life and how she had stood up for her against her mentor.

"And that's the story," Tara concluded and, to her joy, Willow was leaning into her again. Her eyes were closed.

"Wow," Willow whispered. "I remember. You're my guardian angel, Tara. That week... I never felt safer in my life."

"You felt safe when I was trying to harvest your soul?" Tara smiled. "Gee, that's a blow to a girl's ego," she said, being comfortable enough to let humor slip through.

"Hm," Willow replied and suppressed a yawn. "I'm sleepy."

Tara looked at the window and noticed the sun was setting. "Yeah," Tara said. "I think it's time for bed."

"I don't wanna be sleepy, but I've had a long day," Willow yawned. "I still have so many questions, baby."

Tara smiled. "Sleep now. We'll talk more tomorrow. You, um, can take the bed, I'll put some things on the ground and..."

"Tara?" Willow interrupted. "Don't you want to be with me tonight?"

Tara frowned. "W-well, because of... how things are between us, I assumed we'd not be sleeping in the same bed."

"Tara, baby," Willow smiled. "I've had my world turned upside down today, and before that, I wasn't sure if I'd ever see you again. I just... really need to be snuggled right now."

And so, the two lovers put out the fire, turned up the heater and went into the bedroom. It was small, as was everything in this cabin, and had a low ceiling. Even though there wasn't a living soul nearby, Tara closed the curtains and changed into her preferred night attire, a shirt and a pair of boxers, while Willow changed into her night-gown. Willow shivered slightly when her bare feet pattered over the cold floor, so she quickly dove underneath the blankets and into Tara's waiting arms.

The few nights Tara had spent in an empty bed and the loneliness she had felt were banished from her mind and quickly forgotten as she held the girl she loved

---

Tara's eyes fluttered open in the middle of the night, and the first thing that hit her was just how cold she was. She concluded the heater must have shut down again and hugged herself briefly. It was then she found out that Willow had stolen the blankets in her sleep.

Next to her lay Willow, having the blankets rapped around her as if she was a caterpillar in a chrysalis. All Tara could see of Willow was a patch of red hair and a single foot sticking out on the other end. Tara came to the conclusion that Willow had instinctively reacted by wrapping the blankets around her to keep warm. Despite the fact that Tara found this to be incredibly cute, she was also faced with the risk of catching a pneumonia in this northern Canadian cold.

"Sweetie?" Tara said gently and rocked the blanket-chrysalis slightly. "Sweetie, it's getting rather cold here."

"Swimming... in a kiddie-pool... filled with syrup," sounded muffled from the blankets.

Tara saw no other option that to slowly peeling the duvet from Willow. She carefully rolled the blanket-chrysalis to the middle of the bed to minimize the risk of Willow rolling onto the floor and started to work... which was not an easy thing since Willow actively tried to roll the blankets around her body again.

Just as Tara could see the back of Willow's nighty, the other girl felt the cold creeping up her back and sprang to action. Tara yelped when a still-sleeping Willow rolled on top of her, taking the blankets with her. Willow took hold of Tara and continued rolling until the blankets was neatly wrapped around both of them.

Whoa, Tara thought. Now I know what a fly in a web feels like.

Then, she felt Willow's warmth, her body lying on top of her and her head resting on her chest.

Not that I'm complaining, Tara grinned.

---

The second time Tara woke up, it was morning. Next to her, Willow was still sleeping. That was not unusual, though. Nine out of ten times, Tara woke before Willow did, giving her the perfect opportunity to prepare breakfast. Of course, that was only if Tara'd be able to tear herself away from her lover, whose body was pressed against her, and whose hand was resting on one of Tara's breasts.

It took Tara some self-discipline to pull away, even though it was hard to ignore the sleeping Willow's mews of protest and the deep groan of disappointment when Tara finally managed to break away.

She entered the kitchen, got to work and returned to the bedroom with a tray filled with a stack of pancakes, a bottle of syrup and a pull pot of coffee.

"Hmm," said a still sleepy Willow, awakened by the smells wafting in from the kitchen. "Yummy."

"The heater is working again," Tara smiled while Willow sat up and put the tray on her lap. "I, uh, kinda kicked it a couple of times. But goddess, now my foot hurts."

"Who's that?" Willow asked.

"Who's who, sweetie?"

"The goddess you keep referring to," Willow asked while cutting a piece of pancake and popping it in her mouth. She poured coffee in a cup and handed it to Tara.

"Life," Tara smiled and took a sip from her coffee.

Willow frowned. "Reapers worship life?"

"Ironic, isn't it?" Tara smiled. "I wouldn't call it worship, though. It's more of a reverence-thing. Of course, some show more respect to life than others."

Bzzzt. Bzzzzt.

"Tara, you're buzzing?" Willow frowned.

Tara muttered something under her breath and checked her pager. "Oh, I'm sorry, sweetie, I have to go," she said while putting the pager on her nightstand.

"Someone's dying?" Willow asked with a pouty expression while Tara started to change. A few minutes later Tara appeared wearing a thick winter coat, a thick winter set of pants, a furry hat, snowshoes and her cloak draped over it all. Tara took her scythe and clicked it open. "Wait," Willow asked. "How are you gonna get there?"

Tara smiled and said that she would explain later. She pulled the hood over her head and phased away. Willow watched the spot where Tara had stood and realized she was no longer in the room. Even more questions raced through her mind, but she suppressed those urges for now. Tara'd be back soon enough to tell her everything.

Willow finished her breakfast and got dressed. She couldn't resist and hooked up her laptop to Tara's phoneline while brushing her long hair. She logged on and checked her mail. Both Xander and Dawn had sent her mails asking where she was and there was one mail from Buffy.

From : theBuffinator@GallerySummers.net
To : SpazzyspazMcSpaz@hotmail.com
Subject : Oh. My. God!!!!!1!11!!

wills, where are you, why isn't your phone switched one? i really need to talk to you and tara. this is just. wow. crazy. i'm wigged out, here, wills, but cool, i think. faith told me everyting and tara's a reaper too? why didn't you tell me? best freind clause in effect here, wills. faith's all love and support-gal, but i really need... i mean, just plaese come home soon so we can talk!

love, buffy.

Oh, Buff's world must be upside down too, Willow thought while she watched the screen and felt guilty for not being there to support her friend. Sorry, Buff, but I had to save my own relationship first.. She decided to write some mails to her friends to clear things up.

From : "Willow"
To : "Buffy"
Cc : "Xander" , "Dad" , "Anya" <$$$Anya$$$@magicbox.com>, "Dawnie" , "Mrs. Summers" , "Malcolm" , "Jenny" , "Larry"
Subject : TARA!!!

Hey, everyone. I'm here in Canada with Tara. We'll be back in a couple of days. Don't worry, we're here, together and happy.

Love, Willow.

She pressed send and immediately started to write another mail.

From : "Willow"
To : "Buffy"
Subject : Faith and Tara

Yeah, Buff, I know it's huge. I only found out just now and my head's still sorta spinny. I'm sorry you can't call me, but my cellphone doesn't have reach. Then again, I don't think this is something to discuss over the phone.

I know I love Tara very much and, well, I think this whole Reaper thing is a little scary, but also a little exciting. It's like a whole secret society living amongst us and influencing us, kinda like the free-masons but only with real power. Which is probably not what you want to hear right now.

I'm sorry I can't be there for you right now, Buffy, but we'll be back in Sunnydale soon and then we'll talk all night while we're sugared up on mocha's.

Love, Willow.

Willow clicked send and shut down her computer. She knew that someone as enthusiastically affectionate as Buffy wouldn't give up on Faith easily, but was probably a bit freaked.

---

Willow narrowed her eyes and walked through the room. She tried to sense and reach out with her mind, if such a thing was possible. Tara was here in the cabin, she knew that because she could feel her. But where?! There was a feeling in the back of her head, a sort of fuzzy tickle in her brain. Willow closed her eyes, bit her lip, then pointed at the chair near the fireplace. "Okay, Tara, you're over there."

Tara phased into reality... in the kitchen. "I was there, a moment ago, but now I'm here," she chuckled.

"You moved! No fair!" Willow pouted and crossed her arms.

"You found me all four time. So, I figured I'd make it a little more difficult," Tara whispered a brief apology, took off her cloak and invited Willow to sit down beside her. Tara had come back from collecting the soul of a person who had gotten lost in the forest and was dying of exposure. She had made his passing bearable, by being there for him so that he did not have to die alone in these cold, dark woods.

When she'd come back, Willow practically pounced on her with her questions and when Tara told her that she could use her scythe to teleport, she went completely question-crazy. Tara spent some time teleporting around the cabin, inside and outside. After hours of questions, stories, anecdotes, discussions and philosophical debates, Tara suggested a game of hide and seek. Willow turned out to be rather good at seeking.

"So," Willow laid her head in Tara's lap, while the other girl stroked her hair. "What happens when somebody dies at sea? Like in a shipwreck. Do you need diving equipment?"

Tara smiled. "Well, water has no buoyancy when we're ethereal, so it's almost as if it's not there. The soul sinks to the bottom of the ocean. We'll collect it there and teleport away again."

"What if someone falls into a volcano?" Willow asked.

"Magma's considered a solid substance, and the soul will hang above a solid substance. So we'd only have to snatch it up from the surface. Though, in those cases, we'd use our scythes to make the soul float towards us," Tara explained.

"What if someone dies in space?" Willow asked. "Do you have spacesuits? Can you breathe in space? Does the soul orbit the planet or does it fall to the surface? Does the soul suffocate?"

Tara rubbed her chin for a moment. "I... I don't know," she said. "It's never happened before. I'm sure the high-ups up at the Head Office have a scenario planned, but I've never seen it."

"What if someone is shot into the sun? How'd you get the soul, then?" Willow smiled blissfully as she nestled in Tara's lap.

Tara chuckled. "Well, he'll be on his own, because I'm not going to the sun, sweetie. And now you're just being silly."

"Okay, okay, real question this time. How long can you be ethereal?" Willow asked.

"I can manage 6 hours before it becomes uncomfortable, though some veteran Harvesters can keep it up for days," Tara said. "I'm sorry about your experience, Willow. It must have so confusing."

"It was scary," Willow said, "but also very interesting. How come you can move through walls or floors when you're ethereal?"

"It's all about belief," Tara said. "If you believe the ground beneath your feet is solid, it is. If you believe you can pass through the floor and float down to a ground below, you can. Same with breathing. Because you believe you can breathe, you can and..."

"Because if you're sure you can't breathe, you really can't," Willow finished. "I was panicking and just going 'Oh, god, can'tbreathecan'tbreathecan'tbreathe'. So I couldn't."

"You couldn't have known, sweetie," Tara continued while she sat Willow up and started massaging her shoulders. Willow had asked her thousands of questions. Well, maybe not exactly thousands but it sure felt that way. Tara didn't mind answering, since she was only to happy to sate Willow's seemingly endless curiosity. She'd asked questions about the scythe, the cloak, teleporting, Reaper history, the Head Office, Faith. She remembered Willow turning bright red when asking if it was possible to make love when ethereal.

Willow's head suddenly snapped to the fireplace. Immediately, Tara felt the prickling sensation of another Reaper standing near them and couldn't believe Willow had noticed before she did. The Reaper removed her hood.

Faith.

"You know what's the best thing to do when you're ethereal? Sex! Ethereal sex is so great because of belief, you know?" Faith grinned. "If you believe you'll have multiple orgasms, you have multiple orgasms. Cloaks tend to get in the way, though."

Tara shook her head. "You always knew how to make an entrance, Faith."

"Hi, Faith," Willow greeted. "I found Tara."

"Yeah, I can sorta see that, Red," Faith smirked. "And, before you ask, yeah, Buffy's a bit wigged, but she's willing to give us a try."

"Is that why you're so giddy and happy?" Tara crossed her arms.

"You're one to talk," Faith pointed at Willow lounging on top of Tara. "What with you having Red's head in your lap right now. Hey, don't mind me, it's just worth seeing you two turning red as lobsters in the pot."

Tara reached behind the couch and tossed a suitcase to Faith. "We were about to go home... so you can make yourself useful by 'porting our luggage for us."

Faith grumbled for a bit while Willow sat up and reached for her laptop case and Tara reached for her cloak and scythe. Tara held Willow tightly with one arm and clicked open her scythe, getting ready to teleport them back home. "Okay, Willow. You hold on to me and don't let go."

"What happens if I let go during the teleport?" Willow asked nervously.

"Nothing," Tara smiled. "I just like it when you hold me."

"Get a room!" Faith called over from the bedroom.

Willow held on to her Tara and her laptop, not wanting to lose either. She closed her eyes and felt a rush of air swirling around her, although briefly. When she opened her eyes, she was standing in the living room of her own house, back in the warm californian climes. But... they were not alone.

"Uh, hi, Buffy," Tara said sheepishly.

A surprise Buffy stood there like a statue, her cup of doublemeat fibre-free cola slipping from her hand.

---

Willow and Buffy sat next to each other on the couch in silence, neither girl looking at each other.

"I think we got a little more than we bargained for, Wills," Buffy finally said.

"Yeppers," Willow nodded. "But... worth it."

Buffy smiled briefly. "Next time Cordelia comes over to boast, I can make her wiggy. 'Oh, my new boyfriend is soooo rich and handsome, a senior office manager at Microdyne'," Buffy imitated Cordy's nasal whine. "I can say 'Oh, yeah? Well, my girlfriend's the Grim Reaper. And she can kill your sucky boyfriend just by looking at him'."

"I don't think you should do that, Buff," Willow smiled. "For one thing, Faith might actually do it."

"Hm, you're right," Buffy said. "Dead boyfriends don't go ever well at parties. It's a fact of life."

"'Well, Cordy, your boyfriend is the life of the party. Oh, uh, oops, not anymore. Sorry'," Willow giggled.

"'Cordy, have you ever seen Weekend at Bernies?'" Buffy added.

"'Cordy, I hope you weren't too attached to your boyfriend. Oh, I forgot, you're a skanky ho, so of course you weren't too attached to your boyfriend'," Willow smiled.

Buffy made a catty noise. "Check you out, Will. Claws are out, today."

Willow shrugged. "Cordelia brings out the worst in me, ever since she said to me I'd became gay to be fashionable and fit in with the popular crowd. Yeah, Cordy, that's really the reason for my broken heart and the struggles with my sexuality."

"Okay, the level of Cordelia in this conversation is way outside my comfort-zone. Let's tone it down a bit," Buffy chuckled.

"So you and Faith?"

"We're okay," Buffy smiled. "Well, I wanted an interesting and attentive lover. And, well, here she is."

---

"You did what?!" Tara gasped while she and Faith stood on the balcony, looking over the city.

"I figured the way to tell her was to show her," Faith replied with a shrug. "Well, I had to convince her I wasn't messing with her head, first."

"I don't think it was a good idea to bring her with you on an assignment, Faith," Tara said. "The Head Office kinda frowns upon that. Weren't you worried Buffy'd be freaked to see you end someone's life."

Faith shrugged, fished a folded piece of paper from her pocket and handed it to Tara. "Perfect case came along."

"Oh, I see," Tara said when she saw it was a page from a file. The man in question was a serial child-molester, who had killed several of his young victims and dumped the bodies in the ore smeltery where he worked.

"The Powers finally decided it was this A-hole's time to go," Faith said. "I showed Buffy the file and she literally blanched on the spot. I took her along, sorta showed her and told her what I usually did... as much as was possible without going ethereal. Normally I'd think of an ironic and slow death for a kind of guy like this... think along the lines of spilling hot scolding metal ore over his privates... but because Buffy was there, I just used my scythe to make him slip on the railing at the ore smeltery and break his neck."

"How did Buffy handle it?" Tara asked.

"Well, she was kinda shook up, but she actually said she thought he didn't suffer enough," Faith said. "That's a good sign. So, she thinks this is sorta my deal, you know, taking care of the scumbags of the world."

"Faith," Tara broke in. "You also drop piano's on top of old ladies."

Faith shrugged. "I sorta... let Buffy draw her own conclusions."

"Faith..." Tara started.

"I know," Faith sighed. "But... if she really has problems with me, I could always... go back to Collecting, I guess."

Tara turned to Faith. "You'd do that?"

"Yes," Faith smiled briefly. "For her."

---

"Home sweet home," Tara smiled while she plopped down on her own, comfortable bed while Willow put her laptop back on her desk.

She was home.

No more secrets.

No more lies.

Only her and Willow.

Faith and Buffy had left a few minutes ago to get ready for a date. Tara relaxed on top of her pillow. She opened her eyes to see Willow standing at the foot of their bed.

Tara yelped when Willow suddenly let herself fall on top of her and found herself being embraced, carressed and fondled in all kinds of pleasurable ways. "Willow," Tara gasped. "It'll be dinner-time soon."

"Poopy to dinner-time," Willow spoke between kisses while straddling Tara. "I'm not hungry... for food. God, I missed you so much, Tara. Never leave again... I love you."

"I love you too, sweetie."

She tried to say something more, but Willow shushed her. Tara could see a hunger in her eyes, a rabid desire. Willow had come far since that first night they had spent together only a few months back, that was for sure. She shuddered when she felt WillowTongue flick across the nape of her neck and even moreso when WillowHand slid underneath her shirt.

Willow was no longer the innocent virgin she was the night in the tent. For Tara had helped to create a monster. A sexually ferocious monster that was adept at removing bra's and dealt out hickeys as if there was no tomorrow.

It didn't take long for desire took hold of Tara, and kissed her lover back with an equal amount of ferocious hunger. And so both lovers skipped dinner in favor of breakfast the next morning.
[hr]

[MochaVamp]

dibs

_________________________________

Rare is the chance that I will be able to dib so I took advantage of it!

I have enjoyed this story from the start. You do a great job of blending two different worlds. I really like how you make the story wacky and serious at the same time -- that is extremely hard to do.

The WillowBabble and questions were extremely cute -- and so typical of her character. Good thing she has Buffy to share this with, otherwise the girl might explode!

"...all I'm trying to say is, you don't run away from your problems. You sit down together and talk things over... Uh, which I sorta didn't do when I ran out, but I was really sorry and came back and..."

Good advice for all of us

It is nice to see Tara and Willow being honest and trusting with each other. I am glad that Faith decided to tell Buffy, I hope that her spin does not come back to bite her.

[WillowRulez]

[blockquote]Willow was no longer the innocent virgin she was the night in the tent. For Tara had helped to create a monster. A sexually ferocious monster that was adept at removing bra's and dealt out hickeys as if there was no tomorrow. [/blockquote]
Can't say I mind lol.
I really loved the email addresses! Hihi. Buffy's is the best.
Also I had very much the same thought about the Reaper society kinda being like the Free Masons, being secret and all but 'manipulating' the world we know.
*Waiting for next week* Do you think its possible for a Reaper to move forward in time? Cuz... then I wanna be one

[BigBlueEyes]

Oh yay!!!! I love this, I can't get enough. This post was hilarious, I laughed. I can't wait for more, so hurry and write more. Please?

[Willowtree252]

this was a great update I love it more please.

[AlysonGoddess]

Sweet! Im glad everythings working out between them! I wouldve been scared if i was willow hearing that! are the head reaper dudes gunna find out that faith took buffy on a mission whats gunna happen there? I totally wouldve skipped dinner too if i was them! Please update soon!
Erin

[Thianne]

Tara yelped when Willow suddenly let herself fall on top of her and found herself being embraced, carressed and fondled in all kinds of pleasurable ways.

i don't know why, but i just found it so sweet....
love it. update soon

[caz]

Excellent! Only Willow could ask a thousand questions about the same subject. Tara was very honest with her lover and I think that she was really impressed that Willow had found out so much on her own.

Glad to hear that Buffy knows about Faith. I can't believe that she took Buffy on a job with her but sometimes actions do speak louder than words. Maybe this way was easier for Faith.

Can't wait to read more.

Caz

[taralicious]

UO,
WOO-HOO, Willow and Tara are reunited and it feels so good, to quote from Peaches and Herb.
It is amazing what a little perspective can do to change one's drab surroundings from what was a cold and strile environment to one of romance and wonder.
Tara had been brooding in her Canadian ice fortress until Willow, in her Sherlockian way, put two and two together and bade Tara let her in.
Tusk-laden Willow presents an interesting mental picture and could open up a zoological Willow and Tara series if one were so inclined; the Disocvery channel presents anthropormorphic Willow and Tara lovin'.
Do not fret about the expositional back story which followed the reconciliation.
Tara vowed to Willow to give her the entire picture and once again, she is a master of subtlety as compared to how Faith revealed herself to Buffy.
The difference between Faith and Tara being that of show vs. tell.
As a writer, it shows a passionate degree of dedication and love for these characters that you devised this elaborate backstory for the reapers.
Much in the same way as the great fantasists of yore fleshed out their corner of the land of fiction, you have given the reapers an elaborate origin story and a cosmology all their own; granted this usually means the origin of the universe but death being a universal force, it applies here in your story of the gods ceding their powers to mortal families and then buggering off to the great beyond.
The rest of Willow and Tara's time together in Canada can only be classified as indescribably adorably Willow as she plays 2000 questions with Tara addressing every minute aspect of the life/unlife of the Reaper.
So, is it fair to say that if someone is asked to do an overseas disposal, they are known as an International Harvester?

It's like a whole secret society living amongst us and influencing us, kinda like the free-masons but only with real power

That is my favorite sentence from this chapter and does that mean that the various subsets of reapers have a secret handshake as well?
Faith has watched a Warner Brother's cartoon in her day, it sounds like, if she drops pianos onto old ladies.
Willow and Tara are back in their house and having make-up sex and all is right with the world this night.[/quote]

[Darth Pacula]

G'day, UO.

Well, I reckon you were fretting all for nought about this update. Sure, there was a lot of back-story added to the Reapers as a whole, but that's good. I like that kind of detail far better than a barely fleshed out world.

It's so very true, our mood can have so much effect on our opinions. Witness Tara, miserable as all get out, beholds her temporary accommodations as small and dingy. Add Willow and a reconciliation to the mix however, and it magically transforms into cosy and romantic. Nice touch, mate. Loved the walrus bit too.

Willow's sleeping habits were too damn cute, albeit a tad risky for Tara in such a frigid clime. Good thing they're going back to SunnyD, huh? Though I can think of worse fates for Tara to suffer than to be cocooned with Willow in such a way.

I cracked up at the email correspondence section. The email addresses were hilarious (and I'm almost tempted to try them out ), and I especially liked the touch of Buffy's typo's and dubious punctuation.

Whoa! Cordy takes a beating in this update. I guess in this reality her ... er ... character flaws (translation: being a heinous bitch) haven't been filed down by association with the scoobies and Angel. Either that, or you just don't like her.

Faith's method of explaining her job to Buffy was ... different, but very in character. Though, I would have given the rockspider a much more lingering and painful death.

And lets all hear it for the Willow-sex-fiend Monster!

Cheers,
Paul.

[Artemis]

Awww... heart amply warmed

Willow certainly took the revelation of Tara's assignment to her well - sure, there was the initial freak-out (natural enough, given that she hadn't yet been reassured that the Powers didn't still have a contract out on her), but overall she just accepted it as part of Tara's nature, and equated it with all the positive feelings she had from that time, when she believed Tara was her guardian angel.

And Faith seemed to do pretty well with her revelation - though she had plenty of help from the assignment desk in handing her a job it'd be real difficult to take a dim view of. It remains to be seen how Buffy will react once she's had time to process everything, and the downside - the apparently arbitrary way the Powers assign deaths - becomes clearer.

(Speaking of Faith, in a roundabout way, I just found out yesterday that I have the same birthday as Peter Falk. )

I really liked the humour as it came back to Willow and Tara - little things like Tara goofily correcting herself about her cabin's 'cozy and romantic' living room, her reactions to Willow's nocturnal cover-stealing (good solution), Willow's barrage of technical queries about the mechanics of Reaper powers... and of course, walrus Willow. More on that in its proper thread

Oh, and I liked the emails - partly the challenge of coding a decent replica of hotmail on Looking-glass (so far I've only needed Yahoo Mail and GMail for other stories), and partly all the emails in Willow's address book. 'Malcolm@moloch.org', heh. And 'Dawniferous', how did you come up with that? That's my new favourite name.

[Boschi]

I do like your Faith. And the whole damn story too.
Apologies for missing fb on the chapter before this - the whole Willow playing Frogger thing gave me chuckles for days.

W and T were of course adorable (why else do we all read/post) here???

Am eagerly awaiting explanation of W's talent for sensing ethereal Reapers.

Regards,

Boschi

[Willowlover]

Sorry for how long it took me to post. Anyway I like how you had Willow and Tara Handle the fact that Tara was supposed to kill Willow. I also thought that Tara teaching Willow to find her while she was ethereal was cute.

I can't wait to see what happens next.


Thanks for recomending The Frighteners. It was a good movie. Thx.

[The person she loves]

i love it of course. its wonderful and sweet. and i love the Faith character of course i love Faith in general but anyways i cant wait to see what happens between buffy and faith. update soon plz

[Useful_Oxymoron]

Sorry I'm a day late with updating. I've been wallpapering and it's been taking more of my time than expected. I also hope you'll forgive me for postponing commenting to my wonderful feedback on chapter 16 one day. It's 0.30 here, and I, sadly, have work tomorrow. :( I prefer to take the time to sit down to reply to my feedback.

Anyway, on the with the update and then off to bed.

Title - Don't fear the Reaper.

Chapter 17 : Houseguest!

Author name - Useful_Oxymoron

Email Address - Viernadevir@hotmail.com

Rating - PG-13. Humor about death isn't everybody's cup of tea.

Disclaimer - Well, I don't own Willow or Tara. If I did, I wouldn't have made certain... questionable decisions in the latter seasons. In any case, Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy own these characters and I don't intend to make any money off them.

Feedback- Is cool. It's always nice to know somebody liked the crap I write.

Summary- The secret is out and Willow and Tara are still together. How will their life together develop from this point?

Notes- Influences for this story: The wonderful film The Frighteners (which everybody should see), lightly Dead Like Me, Terry Pratchett and the Blue Oyster Cult.

Notes 1 - This story contains direct quotes from The Eye of Argon. If you're feeling courageous, you can check out the entire story in the link below. BE WARNED: your life will never be the same after having read The Eye of Argon.
http://www.dcs.gla.ac.uk/SF-Archives/Misc/eyeargon.html

Notes 2 - This link contains the full rules to an Eye of Argon reading session. I have an Eye of Argon reading at least once a year with a group of close friends and it's great fun.
http://www-users.cs.york.ac.uk/~susan/sf/argnrule.htm

Italics are thoughts.

[hr]
Chapter 17: Houseguest!

Tara pulled the brush down the length of her hair with gentle strokes while sitting at the dresser, already having changed in her usual nightwear of boxers and T-shirt. She smiled when she watched her Willow sitting at the desk, still pouring over her schedule.

College would start again in week and the students had already received their class schedules. Willow had spent the evening studying every angle, aspect and possibility of the offered classes of the year.

"Sweetie, it's time for bed," Tara pressed softly, but already knew it wouldn't help, because Willow was really psyched up about her classes. She was actually sitting at her desk with a calendar and a calculator, trying to fit all the classes she wanted to follow into a single week.

"I know," Willow sighed. "It's just sad that there's only 24 hours in the day, baby. Oh, I'd sell my soul to the devil for 25-hour days right about now. Hey, you think the devil will give me 26 hours if I ask really nicely?"

"I don't think the devil cares much about niceties," Tara continued brushing her hair.

"Hm, I have to work 20 hours at the computer shop, that'll be 8 hours saturday and wednesday and 4 hours thursday afternoon. Of course, I need friends time, homework time and, most importantly of all, Tara-time," Willow said.

"Oh, yes," Tara said while sliding underneath the duvet. "Tara-time is very important."

"There's so many good classes in the second year, and it pains me to have to drop one or two of them, especially since I already cut back on time in the computer lab," Willow pouted heavily. "I was thinking of broadening my horizons a bit. Researching the history of your people was kinda fun, so I've been thinking of adding a few ancient history classes to my curriculum... and maybe doing drama with Buffy. I've almost got my lesson-plan ready now."

"That's great, sweetie," Tara replied genuinely. "At least you won't completely be a slave of the machine," she winked.

"Hey!" Willow replied with mock-indignity. "And here I was planning to recite Sapphic love-poetry to you. This is, if I can ever decided which class to drop. Oh, this is so hard, they're all so good... I mean, I can't drop Computer Architecture or Advanced CGI and Web Design... And I'm just getting carried away, am I?"

Tara smiled. "Well, maybe just a little."

"It's just that I can't wait to get back into college-mode, you know," Willow sighed. "All that learning, all that knowledge. I miss the 'yay'-feeling I get whenever grades are posted on the board. I even miss the soda-machine in the student lounge."

"The one that gives you a free cola if you tap it in the right spot?" Tara asked. "If you ever need a different career-path, you could always plan the Great Soda-Heist."

"Or take a soda into the ancient history class I've just picked, yay me," Willow smiled. "I can totally fit this into my schedule and I don't even have to give up computerlab time. Yay me again!"

"There's a good side to ancient history, you know?" Tara smirked. "No computers."

"Hah... hah... hah..." Willow shook her head. "You can forget about the Sapphic love-poetry now."

"Aw," Tara sighed, but there was a twinkle in her eyes. "A little quirky mythology would be nice too. Think how much more mythology you could learn in ancient history class. Because, you know, I love it when you get quirky."

Willow put down the schedule, turned to Tara and literally jumped out of her her chair. Tara grinned: her gambit had worked. Seeing Zany!-Willow was often drowned out by Scholary!-Willow, Tara had made it her mission in life to bring out Zany!-Willow just a bit more.

"This is the story of a long time ago," Willow spoke semi-seriously as she calmly strolled towards the bed. "A time of myth and legend. When the ancient gods were petty and cruel and they plagued mankind with suffering. Only one woman dared to challenge their power. Willowcles!" Willow postured and flexed to show off her musculature, fielding a rather unimpressive result.

"You're Willowcles?" Tara mock-swooned.

Willow put her hands on her hips, held her chin up and adopted a serious, yet heroic expression. "Mighty Willowcles has arrived to slay the wicked monsters! All hail the mighty Willowcles!"

Tara shot Willow her 'innocent milk-maid'-face and pretended to at the point of fainting. "Oh, mighty Willowcles, my heart is a-flutter. Slay this scary hydra that threatens me by being a nasty phallic symbol!"

"Hahah!" Willow smiled in an exaggerated fashion and put her hands on her hips. "Willowcles fears not the phallus! For it is impotent and has no meaning to me."

The 'hydra' was actually a long, round pillow that the girls used to prop themselves up on when they'd watch TV in bed. Willow shadow-boxed with the long round pillow for a few moments, while humming the theme song from 'Hercules: The Legendary Journeys'. After a brief wrestle on the floor, she triumphantly threw it off the loft into the living room below.

"Hahah!" Willow smirked at Tara. "Another victory for the mighty Willowcles."

"Oh, mighty Willowcles..." Tara swooned

"But wait! Do you think you can fool Willowcles?! For I have seen through your disguise. You are Xara, the warrior princess, seeking to lure me into a trap," Willowcles narrowed her eyes. Tara tried very hard not to laugh, but Willow never broke through the forth wall. Tara was certain she'd do well in drama-class.

"Curses, foiled again!" Tara replied, changing into 'evil warrior'-mode. "But Xara shall not give up easily, Willowcles!"

"Hah!" Willow gently pushed Tara to the bed, pressing again her. Her face was mere inches away from Tara. "Submit, Xara."

"Not without a fight, Willowcles," Tara mock-threatened and wrapped her lips around Willow's.

This began a legendary night, though it must be mentioned that Xara : Warrior Princess gained upper hand more than a few times.

---

Tara opened her eyes, found Willow nestled snuggly against her and still sleeping peacefully. As the sun was shining down upon them from the skylight, it was hard to ignore the big fat and satisfied grin plastered all over her cute face. Tara saw Bobby, Tara's beloved stuffed bear, looking on from the desk... seemingly approving of the scene.

There was bliss here. Pure unadulterated bliss.

In her own home, the sun shining down upon her, her Willow sleeping in her arms... Tara just felt so very happy.

Until the moment of bliss was rather rudely disturbed by the Leisure Suit Larry ringtone of Willow's cellphone. Willow groaned as she stirred herself awake. She shifted on top of Tara, trying to reach the phone that was lying on the nightstand. Unfortunately, Willow leaned over the bed a little too far. With a brief yelp, she tumbled forward and, because she was trying to hold on to Tara, she dragged her lover along for the ride. Both girls and the phone, all covered by the duvet ended up on the floor, with Willow trying to find her phone in the dark.

"Sweetie, I wonder why it is that, ever since I met you, I've ended up naked on the floor so many times," Tara giggled.

"Hello?" Willow asked as she answered the phone. "Huh? Buffy? Buffy, calm down, what's going on? Hm... Hm-hmmm. You and Faith... Venice Beach? What was that about Dawn? WHAT?! We'll be there immediately!"

Willow's head popped up from under the duvet as she switched off her phone. "Buffy needs our help, baby!"

---

There was trouble brewing at Casa de Summers.

"MOM!" Buffy whined in an undignified matter in the kitchen of her home, while her mother stood facing her and her angry little sister stood on the sidelines with her arms crossed. "College doesn't start for another week, it's our last chance."

"No means no, Buffy," Joyce replied sternly. "Dawn has to go to school tomorrow."

"But..." Buffy tried. "You have to take the invitation to your boring Gallery-Holders convention. And the invitation to stay a luxury hotel at Venice Beach... with the two separate rooms for family and/or guest."

Dawn bit her lip slightly. "Why don't you just say that you're trying to ditch your little sister? I don't see you lobbying for me to join you at that luxury hotel."

Joyce stepped in between the two glaring sisters. "Dawn, you have school and you, Buffy, you are being very selfish, young lady!"

Buffy sighed heavily. "That is so unfair, mom. I'm thinking of my honey, here. Come on, this is the last chance Faith and I have to go on holidays."

"Hanging out on the beach, the clubs, the boulevards," Dawn stressed. "without your little brat of a sister, right?"

"Yes! Uh, I mean, no!" Buffy immediately corrected herself. "Please, mom? You know you want to go."

Joyce paused a moment to get the toast from the toaster and pour some milk into a cereal-bowl for Dawn. "Buffy, I do want to go, it's an important conference. But sometimes, we need to make choices in life, and I just can't leave Dawn here all alone on school nights without a sitter."

"MOM!" this time it was Dawn's turn to be indignant. "I so totally don't need a sitter. I'm fifteen years old! I can take care of myself, mom. Please, give me some credit. I'm more mature than Buffy was at that age."

At that moment, the backdoor flew open and in stormed Willow and Tara. Tara looked around frantically, while Willow held ready a heavy fire extinguisher half her size. "Buffy, are you okay? Dawn, Mrs. Summers?" Willow asked.

"I don't see a fire here," Tara said.

"Willow, Tara!" Buffy said sheepishly. "Uh, thanks for coming so quickly."

"Buffy, you told your friends there was a fire?!" Joyce exclaimed.

"Uh, it was easier than having to explain everything over the phone," Buffy bit her lip.

"No fire?" Willow pouted. "But I dragged this fire extinguisher all the way from home. I thought I'd get to be all hero-gal today. Uh, but I'm glad you're all okay, of course, yeah, cause if you were hurt that'd be so not great."

"Got the perfect solution to all our problems," Buffy jumped in before anyone could react. "You go to your boring convention, Faith and I will take the other hotel-room and Dawn could stay with Willow and Tara for five days. Come on, it'll work out fine!"

The silence in the room was oppressive.

"Okay," Buffy shrugged. "Just call me Machiavelli McBuffy."

"Buffy, I'm sure Willow and Tara have..." Joyce started to say.

"It's fine!" Dawn broke in. "I'll start packing for a five-day stay."

"Sure, we'll take in Dawnie," Tara smiled.

"We have plenty of room," Willow said.

Buffy rubbed her hands together in celebration, strikingly similar to Mr. Burns when one of his evil schemes came together.

---

Monday

Dawn followed Tara in their house, carrying a suitcase filled with clothes and other supplies needed for a five-day stay. In her other hand, she held a rolled up sleeping back with a pillow stash in the middle.

"Your house is only two streets away, Dawnie," Tara said while returning to her kitchen quickly to check up on her Raspberry Chicken she was preparing for dinner.

"I know," Dawn replied when she put down her stuff on the couch. "But I want to treat this like a real vacation, a cool multi-day sleepover session. Oh, hey, Buffy!"

Dawn started to pet a happily tail-wagging second houseguest. Faith had needed a place to stash her oversized pooch while she and the other Buffy were enjoying their holidays at Venice Beach. Tara had no doubt that both were enjoying their time. Buffy the dog because there was no shortage of doggy-treats in the house, and Buffy the human because Faith had purchased the single most skimpiest bikini she could find.

"Everybody's taken off already," Dawn said. "So, I get the fold-out couch?"

"It's actually very comfortable, but I think you'll end up sharing it with Buffy in the middle of the night."

The tell-tale sound of a key slipping in a lock downstairs signified the homecoming of Willow. "Hey, Dawn," Willow greeted when she came in. "Hey, baby," she took a moment to kiss Tara on the lips.

"How was your day at the computer shop, sweetie?" Tara asked while making sure her chicken was getting that nice golden brown color.

Willow plopped down on the couch next to Dawn and let out a labored sigh. "Oh, horrible. Three cases of a virus neatly nestled into critical dll's, a fried capacitor on a mainboard, six computers that needed to be assembled and tested and Cordelia once again had an icon that clashed with her background picture. Did you know that Jenny bought color-cards especially for miss Shallow? Jenny and I spent an hour checking those cards to pick out a color she wouldn't object to."

"Poor baby," Tara stepped behind the couch and started to massage Willow shoulders. Willow, in response, closed her eyes, leaned back and enjoyed. "Well, I'll have dinner on the table in a few minutes."

"How was school, Dawn?" Willow asked. "Is crazy miss Drimple still teaching chemistry? Oh, I miss highschool. Well, except Snyder, of course. Who'd miss Snyder?"

While Dawn and Willow swapped experiences of Sunnydale High, Tara put the finishing touch on her Raspberry Chicken. Willow and Tara did not own a kitchen table, but usually settled to eat their meals at the kitchen counter, on a pale on the couch or in bed, so they didn't really one. Tara left the pan on the counter and prepared three plates.

"Oohh, breasts!" Willow raved when she took hold of her plate. "Raspberry covered breasts!"

"I know what you like, sweetie," Tara chuckled.

Dawn, Tara and Willow enjoyed a few stories of Dawn's first day at school over dinner. They discussed meeting of new friends, the start of new classes, the lunch in the cafeteria and how her friend Marci had 'accidentally' switched on the PA-system in Snyder's office, leading to a rather public display of Snyder talking to himself in his office.

"I'm pretty excited about having over our very first house-guest," Willow smiled. "We're real homeowners now, Tara."

"Wuf," sounded from the corner, over at the fireplace.

After dinner and after washing up, Dawn sat on the couch checking the TV-guide she'd brought from home. After a exciting first day at school, Dawn didn't really want to go out and instead opted for a night of movie-watching. "Oh!" Dawn grinned. "American Pie is on today. Mom never let me watch that."

"I don't like that movie, Dawn," Willow bit her lip. "That skanky band-camp chick looks just like me! It's just too darn freaky. And... and I'd never treat a flute in such a disrespectful matter."

Dawn frowned. "What'd she do with the flute that was so disrespectful?"

"Uh, sweetie," Tara shook her head.

"Yeah, yeah, that band-camp chick, um, she kinda... um... well she dragged her flute through the mud and then it didn't work anymore," Willow stammered. "So that's what so disrespectful about."

"Why didn't she just clean it?" Dawn asked.

"Because, um, because... oh, crud, that's a tough one... Uh, well, it, uh, it was mud containing heavy metals so it sorta corroded the flute till it became all rusty and stuff. Totally unplayable, in fact, it sounded totally horrible. And, see, I'd never do that, because that'd just be a cryin' shame if such a beautiful instrument was to be completely ruined."

Dawn scrutinized Willow for a moment. "She stuck it somewhere, didn't she?"

"No, no, no... NO! There was no sticking of any kind!"

"No American Pie for Dawn tonight, I guess," Dawn frowned. "Oh, hey, Hercules is on in five minutes!"

And so two very blushing and rather quiet girls watched Hercules with an oblivious Dawn.

---

After a pleasant evening, Willow had helped Dawn set up the fold-out couch, she went to the loft, got changed and dove into bed, next to Tara. She waited... and waited... and waited until Dawn switched out the lights downstairs before making her move.

"Hm?" Tara replied while Willow trailed kisses along Tara's collarbone.

"Hmmm," Willow groaned slightly when she embraced Tara, her hands starting to slide along the rim of her lover's boxers while kissing the nape of her neck and feeling Tara's nimble fingers sliding through her hair.

"Hm, wait," Tara whispered before Willow hungrily claimed her mouth again.

"Don't wanna stop," Willow replied while her hand slid fully underneath the hemline of Tara's boxers. "And you don't want me to stop either."

A sharp intake of breath later, Tara managed to gasp out a single whispered word : "Dawn."

Immediately, Willow stopped. "Oh," she said, realizing they had an open loft and Dawn was only sleeping a few feet away, on the fold out couch.

"So we shouldn't..."

"I guess..."

"We really shouldn't..."

"We're not going to... for five whole days?!"

"They say abstinence is good for the soul."

"I bet the body says it sucks."

"That's okay!" Dawn called up to the loft. "You can have sex if you want. I won't hear anything."

Tara and Willow stared at each other for a moment. "Sweet dreams," they said at the same time and put their heads on their perspective pillows.

---

Tuesday

The next day, Dawn left early for school. Willow had intended to make up for a night of pleasure lost, had it not been for Tara being on call. Seeing how many people had returned from holidays now that school had started again, there was an influx of deaths through domestic and traffic accidents. When asked why this was, Tara just shrugged and said just it happened every two weeks after summer holidays.

And because Tara had such a long and busy day, Willow ended up cooking today. After dinner, they ended doing an Eye of Argon reading. It was a story and a game that Dawn had discovered while cruising the net. The Eye of Argon was written in the seventies as an early example of fan fiction and published in a fanzine. The story, aptly known as the worst story every written, starred the mighty barbarian Grignr, looking to sate his mighty barbarian lusts but being thrown into an evil dungeon instead.

The object of the game was to read the story aloud, as is. When the reader bursts out in laughter, he or she should hand it to another to continue the reading. Reading was to be done 'as is', including mispronouncing the story's many type-o's and inappropriately chosen words. The story was so bad, it was good.

"The vile stench of the Shaman's hot fetid breath over came the nauseated female with a deep soul searing sickness, causing her to wrench her head backwards and regurgitate a slimy, orange-white stream of swelling gore over the richly woven purple robe of the enthused acolyte," Dawn read, pausing to bite her lip for a moment. Almost she gave in to the laughter. "The priest's lips trembled with a malicious rage as he removed his callous paws from the girl's arms and replaced them with tightly around her undulating neck, shaking her violently to and fro..."

It was too much for Dawn. She collapsed backwards against the couch, red in the face from laughter. "Undulating," she chuckled while handing the paper to Tara.

Tara scraped her throat and started reading. "The girl gasped a tortured groan from her clamped lungs, her
sea blue eyes bulging forth from damp sockets. Cocking her right foot backwards, she leashed it desperately outwards with the strength of a demon possessed, lodging her sandled foot squarely between the shaman's testicles..."

Tara didn't last much longer afterwards. "Between?" Tara snickered. "She, um, she's got good aim."

Willow sat up straight as she took the paper, determined to read more than just a couple of sentences this time. She sat back, stoney-faced, and started to read. "The startled priest released his crushing grip, crimping his body over at the waist overlooking his recessed belly; wide open in a deep chasim. His face flushed to a rose red shade of crimson, eyelids fluttering wide with eyeballs protruding blindly outwards from their sockets to their outmost perimeters, while his lips quivered wildly about allowing an agonized wallow to gust forth as his breath billowed from burning lungs. His hands reached out clutching his urinary gland..."

Buffy looked up on surprise when she heard something rolling off the couch onto the floor. Willow had exploded with a gale of laughter that had been building up from the first word she'd read.

"Okay, okay, time-out," Dawn called.

"I need... drink..." Willow laughed.

Tara jumped to the occasion and gathered some sodas from the fridge.

"This guy who wrote this," Dawn said. "Is a genius. No denying it. Nobody can write this bad deliberately."

"Are you kidding?" Willow chuckled. "Check out the dark corners of the internet sometimes."

"Whoever he is," Tara said. "He's brought joy and laughter to millions of people. That should be the dream of any writer."

"Okay, let's continue," Willow said, putting on her resolve-face. "I'm ready now. Completely ready. I'm not gonna laugh at all now and I know I also said this three pages, but now I really mean it."

"Urinary gland..." Dawn started and immediately doubled over.

And from Dawn to Tara to Willow to Dawn to Tara to Willow...

---

Wednesday

Willow felt the sun on her cheeks as she groggily tried to wake up. It was doomed to failure, so instead she nestled into her pillow. In the background, she heard someone walking up the stairs, followed by the tell-tale thump of somebody jumping onto bed.

"Hm, Tara," Willow murmured. "Has Dawn gone off to school yet?"

She felt a soft tongue starting to lick her face.

"Hmmm, that answers my question," Willow scooted over to the form lying next to her.

"Willow!" she heard Dawn calling from downstairs. "Tara wants to know how you'd like your omelet!"

At this point, Willow figured out that something was very, very wrong here. If Dawn and Tara were downstairs, then who was...? The licking continued, but when Willow felt Tara's body, she wondered where all the fur had come from. And she noticed before that Tara had twelve nipples.

Opening her eyes, it was revealed that Buffy had taken up residence on Tara's side of the bed.

"Eep!" Willow exclaimed. Buffy, suddenly very startled, jumped out of bed and ran downstairs, knocking over two chairs and a table in the process.

---

Buffy stirred from her sleep in her pampered, luxury hotel room while lying in her pampered, luxury bed and waited for her pampered, luxury room-service to bring them their breakfast. Everything was so wonderful here. Warm, nice, soft... and did she mention pampered and luxury. Everything was so pampered and luxury here that Faith had brought an extra bag to stuff in the soaps, bathrobes, towels, slippers, contents of the mini-bar and probably the Flatscreen TV too, given the chance.

Buffy felt Faith's arms around her. And every shred of guilt about dumping Dawn with her best friends disappeared.

"Love you, B," Faith whispered softly in her sleep. Buffy couldn't help but think what a complex person Faith was. So tough while awake, so vulnerable when asleep. So strong and yet so insecure.

Faith was the girl who considered King Kong a 'chick flick' and yet cried softly when Kong died, explaining it away by saying she had dust in her eyes.

Buffy really wanted to make this work. So far, she'd managed to drive away all the men in his life and she wasn't really clear what exactly went wrong in her relationships. She didn't want that to happen again, Buffy desperately wanted to make things work with Faith.

Luckily for her, Faith was as smitten with her as she was with Faith. Maybe even moreso.

---

"Hey, guys?" Dawn called when she opened the door and stormed in. "Guys, where are you?" she added

A crash sounded from the broom-closet. The door swung open and out came a flushed Willow and Tara, who quickly adjusted their clothing.

"Hi, Dawn!" Willow said, a little too loudly.

"We were just, um, we were... um..."

"You see, Tara was going to vacuum and, uh, she fell so I went in to help her."

"You were going to vacuum the broom-closet?" Dawn frowned.

"It's, um, a very dusty."

"Yes, very, very, very, very dusty. Dust everywhere!"

"Okay," Dawn rolled her eyes. "Whatever. Guys, Buffy wants to be walked."

---

And so three girls ended up walking through the park being dragged along by an enthused dog. Tara, Willow and Dawn, each holding one of the three leashes attached to Buffy's collar. The huge mastiff, eager to do her business, but still trying to find the right spot, dragged the three girls along as if they were made of paper.

"Geez, is this a dog or a horse?" Willow grimaced as she tugged on the leash, with very little effect.

"How does Faith keep this dog under control?" Dawn asked.

"Faith is deceptively strong," Tara confirmed.

"Faith doesn't do anything small, does she?" Willow grimaced. To the girl's intense relief, Buffy finally found a good spot which gave them a reprieve.

Bzzzzt. Bzzzzt.

"I'm buzzing," Tara fished her pager from her pocket and checked the message. "Damn, I'm sorry, but I have to go."

"You're leaving us with super-dog here?" Dawn asked.

"A train derailed just now. I have to be there for... insurance purposes," Tara said, apologized and again slowly took off.

While Dawn and Willow watched Tara leave, Buffy started to get active again. Dawn quickly suggested to wrap the leash around their wrists to have a better grip. It went well for a while, although without Tara's added strength, they could barely hold on to the dog. And then, everything went straight to hell:

Buffy saw a cat.

Buffy's gentle face twisted into a snarly, foamy, toothy mask of rage. Deep growls emanated from the depths of her lungs while her body tensed considerably.

Feeling the tension in the air, the two girls frantically tried to remove the leash from their wrists. Sadly, Buffy was quicker than them. A screaming Willow and Dawn ended up being dragged across the park for what seemed like an eternity.

And so, when they came back home, a very guilty Tara washed Willow and Dawn's dirty clothes and prepared them home-made icecream to recover after a nice warm bath.

And a rather sad Buffy was proclaimed to be a 'bad dog', a 'very bad dog' and even a 'very very very bad dog'.

---

Thursday

Thursday came the rather unique situation in which both Dawn and Willow wanted to use the laptop at the same time. Dawn wanted to work on her latest story, while Willow wanted to spend some time playing Republic Commando. And since her desktop was lying in pieces because she was in the process of physically overclocking her videocard, Willow could only play on her laptop at the moment.

A quick game of rock-paper-scissors ended up with Dawn being artistic and with Willow being disappointed and pouty.

"Hm," Dawn wondered. "What fits here? 'Strike them down' or 'Annihilate them'?"

"Who's the character?"

"Big, bad master vampire," Dawn said. "Still, I don't want him to sound too corny."

"Is he the vampire with the soul?" Willow asked.

"Nah," Dawn said. "I like to put in some more bad-boy vamps. Think Draco Malfoy with fangs. Only even more evil and not all whiny like he was in Half-Blood Prince. I need someone really evil to contrast with the vampire-with-a-soul aspect. Say, Tara's been out long, hasn't she?"

"Yes," Willow replied. "She has very irregular hours," she added. To their friends, they kept up the guise of Tara being an insurance inspector until they had decided if and when they would tell them about Tara's unusual career."

"Maybe I could put you in one of my stories."

"Do I get to be a vampire?" Willow asked.

"Actually," Dawn said, "I was thinking more along the lines of making you a witch."

"Aww," Willow pouted. "I really wanted to be a vampire. You know, a vampire who's evil... and skanky! And wears leather!"

Dawn blinked. "Wow. I just got a great idea for a new story. Thanks, Willow."

"Willow aims to please. Uh, no pun intended," she blushed.

---

Friday

"Thanks for having me over," Dawn hugged both Willow and Tara in turn. "I had great fun."

"I'm sure Buffy and Faith had too," Tara smiled. Joyce had already carried Dawn's luggage to the car and invited the both of them to dinner tomorrow as a way of thanks.

"See you tomorrow!" Dawn waved goodbye and walked out the door, leaving Tara, Willow and Buffy in the living room. Buffy, who was waiting for Faith to pick her up, lay in front of the fireplace, being as lazy a big dog could be.

"I think Dawn has a bit of a non-sexual crush on you, sweetie," Tara smiled.

"What?" Willow blinked. "Dawn can't have a crush on me. I... I... Buffy'd kill me! And she's fifteen! The words 'jail' and 'bait' spring to mind here."

"Relax, sweetie," Tara chuckled. "She just thinks you're cool. And you are."

"Me cool?" Willow frowned. "You do realize I'm a big spaz, don't you?"

"I do, but I love you despite of that," Tara smiled, earning herself a playful swat to the shoulder.

Tara walked over to the mailbox to gather their mail. When she got up again, she noticed Willow hovering seductively on the couch. "So, Tara," Willow said. "Two people. House to themselves. Five days of drought... Five long days of desires painfully unfulfilled."

But Tara's eyes were drawn to the letter that was in her hands. Something about it unnerved her. It was a letter sent by the Head Office 'to the urgent attention to ms Tara Maclay'. She ripped over the envelope and unfolded the paper.

"Collector Senior Tara Maclay,

It has recently come to our attention that you have become romantically involved with a non-Reaper. According to rule 57, paragraph 567, subparagraph 789 of Reaper handbook 12, you are required to report this to your supervisor, in this case, Collector Coordinator Darla Cooke within three months. You have failed to meet these requirements. Therefore you must report to miss Cooke who shall arrange for a proper screening of your non-Reaper paramour within a period of two weeks. Failure to comply will result in deduction of salary and further action we may deem appropriate."

"Tara?" Willow asked with some concern. "What's in the letter?"

Tara gritted her teeth when she realized who must have reported her to the Head Office. "Damn you, dad," Tara sighed. With heavy heart, she took the letter to Willow to give her the bad news.
[hr]

Thanks for reading. Sorry about the length of the story. Sorta lost control over it.

[Willowlover]

Yay! Update. Thank you so much. Ive been wanting to read this ch. since the last one. I come home from my UV Light Therapy and here it was.

Willow wanting to play Republic Commando was awsome. And buffy telling Willow there was a fire. Bad Buffy, That's a very bad Buffy.
Anyway this update made my day. Can't wait to read more.

[AlysonGoddess]

ooooo its gunna get exciting from here!!!!!!!

[Darth Pacula]

G'day, UO.

Ahh, time for more Reaper related hijinks with our favorite two ladies and their assorted loopy friends. Add this to the fact that I actually read this (covertly) at work, and you have one happy wee daft git (by which I mean me ).

We open on a scene of tranquil domesticity, with Willow indulging her delightfully quirky obsession with ordering her daily schedule. I'm glad that work and school haven't filled all of her available hours though. Tara-time is definitely a necessity, I reckon.

"I don't think the devil cares much about niceties,"

I love that! Don't know why, but it brings a big stupid grin to my face every time I read it.

The epic adventures of Willowcles and Xara! What a hoot! You know, I reckon you could start another of those little silly ubers you do so well with this. I can just imagine the adventures of the not-so mighty daughter of Zeus, always in the shadow of her arrogant brother Hercules. Or is that just a stupid idea? You can never tell with me.

Cue Buffy's interruption, and the devious ploy of crying fire. I do have to wonder, if their house really was on fire, what could Willow and Tara expect to do with just a single fire extinguisher. Also, why didn't they teleport? Would have saved them some effort, right?

The 'American Pie' discussion ... Too funny, mate!

"They say abstinence is good for the soul."

"I bet the body says it sucks."

"That's okay!" Dawn called up to the loft. "You can have sex if you want. I won't hear anything."

Tara and Willow stared at each other for a moment. "Sweet dreams," they said at the same time and put their heads on their perspective pillows.

Brilliant!

Never heard of the 'Eye of Argon' but it sounds fun, I've copied it onto my hard drive, and I'll have to find the time to read it somewhere. So much fic, so little time

I could just keep going like this, but needless to say, the entire week was great fun, especially their 'closet vacuuming' and the dog walk hijinks.

But then we finish with our girls trapped in the cruel clutches of bureaucracy, betrayed by Tara's very own father. He's not coming off as well this time as his last appearance. Before, he at least seemed to have what he though were Tara's best interests at heart, but warning against something is a world apart from actually ratting them out to the suits. Grrr! One ass kicking, coming up!

Great update, UO. Keep 'em coming.

Cheers,
Paul.

[spells42]

Scheming Buffy was very funny - as was Willow and Tara dealing with Dawn living with them for a week. Lofts are definitely a drawback with visitors.

Chuckled at the way Dawn's writing seems to follow familiar story lines and characters.

Tara ignored a rule?!?! wow! It must be love.... Hope she sorts everything out ok.

Anne

[viximon]

Where on earth did my last review go?
I just hope this one don't get lost.

Hey Oxy, great chap!! Love it. I know I repeat myself to boredoom but is true, I can't help it. Buffy (the Machiavellic one) made a smart move here and surprisely it went well. She and Faith are perfect together, Wills and Tara are more adorable though. Taking care of Buffy Baddog (it's like a middle name, isn't it? he he) and Dawn was so sweet of them.
THeir relationship go wonderful. Poor them anyway, they need to vacuum the broomcloset more times. Dawn and the fanfic fever is still great. How I would like to read something that girl writes about...

Now, the letter from hell. Again things were good and flash new problem appear.

Keep it up and update soon so we can see what's next.
Take care, see you around

[Boadecia]

Darla? oh that cant be good! cant wait!!!

[Thianne]

"Damn you, dad,"

That's exactly what i thought! Stupid moron....

[caz]

Tara's father is a meddling git!

Looking forward to the next update.

Caz

[Useful_Oxymoron]

Here I am with replies for chapter 16. Sorry for being late and thanks for your patience.

Mochavamp - Feel free to dib away, if you so desire. Glad to hear you're liking the story. I like to mix wackiness with seriousness. The contrast makes the wackiness even wackier. Maybe Faith will have problems, maybe not. I'm not decided on that yet. Willow and Tara belong with each other (well, this IS the kittenboard, after all. ) but they have had some hurdles to jump.

Willowrulez - Thanks! I had great fun coming up with the email addy's. LOL! I maintain that the Reapers are freemasons... only with actual power. I don't think Reapers can time-travel, btw.

BigBlueEyes - Thank you! New chapter has been posted yesterday.

Dianneswillowtree - Thanks! More has just been posted.

AlysonGoddess - Thanks! Faith's one one to keep to rules, so I doubt they'd find out. And dinner was eminently skip-able at that point.

Thianne - Thanks! Glad you think so.

Caz - I can really see Willow being confronted with a totally new subject to want to know every single thing about it as quickly as possible. I'm certain that Tara was impressed... and perhaps a little unnerved... that she's found out so many Reaper facts all by herself. Faith's less of the tell and more of the do, I figure.

Taralicious - Well, I haven't exactly written a discovery documentary, but it came close. Thanks for the inspiration, btw. It helped me create a fun story.

Tara vowed to Willow to give her the entire picture and once again, she is a master of subtlety as compared to how Faith revealed herself to Buffy.

LOL! I think everybody is a master of subtlety compared to Faith... well, maybe except Tom Green.

As a writer, it shows a passionate degree of dedication and love for these characters that you devised this elaborate backstory for the reapers.
Much in the same way as the great fantasists of yore fleshed out their corner of the land of fiction, you have given the reapers an elaborate origin story and a cosmology all their own; granted this usually means the origin of the universe but death being a universal force, it applies here in your story of the gods ceding their powers to mortal families and then buggering off to the great beyond.

Whoa, that's quite a compliment. Thank you very much. Yeah, I sorta pieced together a basic background for the Reapers when designing the first six parts (then four parts. Go figure), but kept expanding it. It's where my roleplaying background comes in, I suppose.

Reapers are alive, though, they're not unliving. And, I guess the people who die in international waters are collected by unassigned Reapers or trainees, I think.

A secret handshake? Hm, that gives me some intruiging ideas. And, yep, lotsa make-up sex. Best part of having a fight.

Paul - Thanks, glad you liked the background. I usually tend to fret about these sorta things because my low self-esteem kicks in easily when I reveal those deeper things I thought up.

I've noticed how everything can seem a little brighter when even a simple thing turns out positive for a person. Or vice versa, sadly.

I have no doubt that Tara tremendously enjoyed being cocooned in with Willow and is probably secretly planning a trip to Greenland next year.

Glad you liked the corrospondence. I probably should have put up a warning that I made these e-mail addy's up. I hope nobody actually uses these. And, to be fair to Buffy, she was a bit upset when she wrote the e-mail.

I hate Cordelia with a passion. Shallow, moronic, a nag... the kind of person have to deal with every day at the customer service I work with. Even though I only write letters, you can taste the bile from those Cordelia-type customers.

True, usually Faith would have come up with a more ironic death... think along the lines of that guy getting his penis dipped into a vat of molten lead... but Buffy was there, and she had no idea how she'd react, so she opted for being conservative.

Chris - Glad to have warmed thine heart. Willow remembered how she felt that week: very safe, secure and loved even then. So telling Willow actually worked in Tara's favor.

I'm still working on the developing relationship between Buffy and Faith and their possible future. I'll see how they'll take the hurdles as they come.

The same birthday as Peter Falk? Cool! As far as celebrity birthdays go, yours truly shares a birthday with Lucy Lawless and Eric Idle.

After all the tention and angst, I think it was appropriate to pump some humor and quirky romance back into the story. For my own sake as much as the reader.

I'm glad you liked the emails. And I really like how they came out on the Looking Glass. They look really cool. Dawniferous originally came from the word 'splendiferous', just slightly altered. ;

Boschi Faith is fun to write. And I'm glad you like the story. W/T is the ultimate adorable. Willow can sense Reapers slightly because many humans can, in varying levels. Many people (in RL, whose accounts this is based on) actually feel someone in the room with them when a loved one has just died. I might be a-spiritual, but I figured I could use that for the story.

Willowlover - That's okay, you're here now and I appreciate it. I wanted to put in some cute bits to compensate for the angst in the previous parts. Glad it worked.

Kudos for watching the Frighteners! That's one film everybody should see.

The Person She Loves - Thanks! More story will be posted soonish, I hope. And there'll be more Buffy and Faith too.

Thanks again!

[WillowRulez]

I wanna whack Tara's Dad with my Scythe! Granted, it's made out of plastic... but who cares!!! Rules for dating? Laws even? Sick.
You had me rolling all over the floor. Again. Willowcles and Xara? How come that fic hasnt been written yet? Also, Buffy the dog. She bears a striking resemblance to her name's sake...

And so two very blushing and rather quiet girls watched Hercules with an oblivious Dawn.

Oblivious runs in the family apparantly.
Dawn giving WT sex permission haha... that really did it for me.
Now the only thing left for me is read The Eye of Argon. Maybe I'll find some weird people to read it with me hehe.

[Grayson]

I just started reading this story a few days ago and have been catching up on it all week. I love it! The characterization is great, and I love how they're dealing with all of the pitfalls of a secret identity. Dawn writing awful Draco/Hermione slash fic was hysterical, and I really like how that's morphed into funny little nods to BTVS. Tara mystifying Willow's mom was great, and I'm glad Willow and her dad are forging a relationship. Now they just have to deal with Tara's dad...

I don't know if anyone else has mentioned this in their feedback, but this story reminds me a bit of Piers Anthony's On a Pale Horse, the first book in a series called Incarnations of Immortality. In it, the main character kills the incarnation of death and therefore must assume his job. He's like Tara - still human, but with special powers when he wears the cloak. He has the titular pale horse and collects souls, much like Tara. You should definitely check it out if you haven't read it.

[willowbaby05]

Hello,
I guess you can always count on Tara's father to fuck something up. God I hate him!! But I love the update and I hope you have another one coming..

[Artemis]

Hee, Eye of Argon rules! Where else can you find nipples described as 'sagging', in a context that suggests the author thought this was a good thing? That's a class of its own.

This was a really fun chapter - though the sting in the tail, of Willow needing to face the music, Reaperwise, is worrying, depending on whether or not her investigation leads to anyone noticing that she was meant to be harvested a while back. If not, I can imagine it might go smoothly - given what Willow's managed to work out, the Reaper bureaucracy may as well clear her, and keep her where they can keep an eye on her, rather than potentially muck things up by upsetting her. I wonder whether it'll come out that she already contacted the bureaucracy on her own, where she called Darla, and what consequences that might have? Impersonating a field agent, or whatever it was Darla thought she was? Then again, one could argue that Willow didn't actually impersonate anyone, and it was just Darla being a ditz that let her get away with it.

(By the way, I finally realised why it sounded familiar: was "That's a stupid question!" a DS9 reference? The Jack Pack?)

Anyway, bureaucracy aside... Willow and Tara's week taking care of Dawn was great. I like how you make her annoying, but not annoying, if you get what I mean. And how she's always one step more aware than the 'adults' are worried she is, with her guessing what went on in American Pie, and knowing what Willow and Tara wanted to be up to at night, and so on.

Yay for more Buffy the dog, too She needs to find a Faith-the-dog, obviously, to keep her from putting the moves on Willow

Speaking of Faith, I really liked the scene with her and Buffy in the middle of the chapter - about how soft and vulnerable she is, and that Buffy sees that (though I guess Tara may suspect). All that and sexy bikinis - no wonder Buffy's smitten

[taralicious]

UO,
Willow being a slave to the machine? So she and Tara have added toys to their lovemaking?
Oh, I get it now. Willow being a slave to the computer in a sort of 2001 sort of way.
The sentience of mankind deferring to the sentience of AI.
The Great Soda-Heist. Not exactly the Great Train Robbery or the Great Christmas Kidnapping Caper but one must play to one's strengths and an unlimited supply of caffeinated sugary beverages is like gold to a computer programmer such as Willow.
Willowcles and Xara make ancient history accessible to contemporary students and bestows a relevance which dry academic texts could never hope to emulate.
The vision of Faith clad in her dental floss bikini has ignited a fire in me which no extinguisher can put out.
Willow and Tara are such good sports and genuinely love Dawn as a kid sister or niece that her annoying teenage angst and petulance can be overlooked.
Whether it's through being the internet generation or through some other dissemination, teens today know far more than I ever did at that age i.e, Dawn being fully aware of Willow and Tara's lame excuses to shield her from their sexual deprivation and their steps to relieve the tension.
Dawn is so matter of fact and open about it that it makes you wonder if she's not one of those "Rainbow party" kids or whatever they're called.
The oral sex multi-colored lipstick girls.
Ah, The Eye of Argon.
Good times, Good times. Like reading one of the Gor novels only without the literary prestige of that series.
Isn't that the way of fate, though. Dawn leaves after a week allowing Willow and Tara to get all juiced about relieving thier tension when WHAM! the letter from the head office puts a damper on their fire down below quicker than that extinguisher Willow lugged all the way over to the Summer's household.
I believe Charlton Heston put it best in the classic final scene of "Planet of the Apes" when he said "Damn you, damn you all to Hell. You finally did it."
Imagine Willow and Tara on the beach and cursing Tara's father with every Anglo-Saxon oath known to woman.