ooooooooookaY! SO! Double drama’s cancelled and Bell is home alone again and very very bored
yes.. its true.. after LOOOOTS of delay! IT IS pointless unhelpful babbling feeeeeeedback time!!! GATHER ROUND!
Okay, warning, this is gna be daaaamn long! You can expect no less from miss G’s number one fan! That’s right! I am u know *proudly shows off her badge* she maaaade it for me! Oh *glares* stay back.. ITS MINE!!!! Hmm? What? *looks at editor* feedback? Oh.. riiight..
Lets go from the beginning shall we? Own.. *sighs* when I first read ur lil installment of poems I sat there goin
she. can. write. poetry?!?!?! And well lol, u know ur an awesome writer, but this really was an exceptional way to start out..
And the nominee for Favourite Part is:
Quote:
Skin so silken
Hair so soft
Body so weilding
Owning me to the point where I no longer recognise
Who I've
Become.
Ugh.. that ending, u do it with most of ur poems, the last few lines just cut so deeply,
all painful and stuffs..
I’m just in love with the style you write in, it’s so damn emotive, even when it’s structured, like with Fade, the rhyming and stuff, even when you do that.. I can’t explain it, every single thing you’ve ever posted just has such amazing fluidity to it, and even when that fluidity is jarred because of the emotions behind the words, well, u still get it, and it just makes the overall affect that much more touching.
And the nominee for Favourite Part is:
Quote:
So you close your mouth tightly
And give up the fight
And allow yourself, ever so politely,
To fade slowly from sight.
Like I said before, you always do it, just those last few lines, they take my breath away and I almost slump and go ‘oh oooow! daaamn ow!’
I actually really love it when you rhyme your poems. Some people, they kind of force the words to fit and it ends up ruining the whole poem, you’ve never done that, everytime you rhyme, like oh! Innocence shattered! Love that one! Anyway, everytime you do it, it just fits so well, like the words were meant to be written, you don’t even think about the individual words, but the meaning they’re putting across, and that’s the whole point of poetry right?
And the nominee for Favourite Part is:
Quote:
Innocence shattered
My heart a constant ache
My body battered
You left this in your wake.
Conjures up such a powerful image, so destroyed *sighs* looove reading ur poems
Another of my favourite’s has to be taken, god, especially this bit:
Quote:
I hear you scream so desperately
Shaken, as you're torn away
Your nails scrape my skin
As you're taken anyway.
I feel you gone
Eternally
Ever
Taken
Gooooooooooooooooooooooooooodddd daaaaaaaamn! Fricken amazing.. all of it.. Eternally, ever, taken. Perfect way to end it.. just.. wow.. amazing.. nothing more I can think to say about that.. its just.. its awesome
And ooooooooooooomfg! My favourite lines EVER in any of ur poems are these from Bribes:
Bribing me
With kisses so soft.When I read that in my head, even the words are whispered, its like this really sad.. defeated line.. *sighs* shifts everything inside me and makes me go all mushed lol!
*is prodded out of her swooning over the lines* ….huh? hm.. oh.. *glares at editor* IM FEEDBACKING OKAY! YES I KNOW IM TAKING MY TIME! JUST BUGGER OFF! *rolls her eyes* git..
Oh.. *grins* here’s a niiiice poem, yes, very nice indeed..
Quote:
Agony
At the memory
Of how I became yours
To play with.
No more
Never
Ever
Again
I'm my own.
Geeeeeeee… more important lines have never been written.. try reading over them whenever u feel ur weakening dammit! Listen now.. You’re. Ur. Own. *grins and nods* u got that? gooooood! Now lets say it together…
...okay okay.. moving on.. another example of your awesomeness.. just this line from Pool: as your eyes glint mistrust, cold skin against mine. When you look at it, there’s no big words.. its not worded in a particularly complicated way.. but honestly it’s one of the best lines I’ve read. I love that bit.. ‘eyes glint mistrust’ its so foreboding, ominous, very very cool indeed.. I think u deserve many claps for that one.. *claps*
Oooooooh.. onto my favourite ever.. Hiiiiiiidddeeen Truuuuuuuuth
Pretty sensitive subject matter for me so I guess that explains why I love it so much, but honestly, how could I not?! Its damn awesome! If you just skim over the lines, not even pay much attention to them they STILL make you feel like crying.. you can’t ignore words like these.. :( they make me so sad..
Quote:
Face hurting, cracked from lies
And forced down
Feelings.
aaaaaaaaaaaaaand…
Quote:
And forced to wander
How soon until you have to
Hide it
The true emotions
All away again?
aaaaahh.. the universal question lol
aaand hey hey hey hey! This next one! Tease! That better not be bout the song I was telling u about! coz if it is! I will so NEVER be able to talk 2 u about music EVER again!
eeeh.. sooorrryy but hey.. atleast you made an awesome poem out of it..
And the nominee for Favourite Part is:
Quote:
Playing with a conscious mind
To dip and sway; to fade away
Unravelling what was made
Especially the last part ‘unraveling what was made’ woooooow..
*cowers in the face of ur awesomeness*
BUT OMG! BEST YET WWWAAAASS:
Quote:
Laugh
I laugh
And, God, it's real
A real laugh
A smile
That's pure
And true
And not faked.
I'm confused
That's not happened before.
:D:D:D:D U LAUGHED!??!?! UR SERIOUS?!?!?! *giggles* this is AMAZING! You gotta do it again! What did it? did u fall over?
WAS IT WHEN U ALMOST TOOK MY BADGE AWAY AND I GOT SAD?! I can’t believe u laughed at me
meeean..
But okay! Enough is enough! The editor (who is ‘the editor’ u ask? Well.. I don’t know.. *whispers* no body does…) is prodding me aaaand I gotta eat yogurt cooz im hungry
:D sooo! Hope you’ve enjoyed my extensive feedback! Please excuse the delay
Farewell lil G; my Australian compadrè!
*gallops away*
- bellness