Yay! Addiction!
I've said it before, but it merits saying again: I love that you guys enjoy this. It makes me feel good about it, and I appreciate all the feedback I've gotten about this story.
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Title: Play It From the Heart
Author: Nixel (formerly Big Dummy)
Rating: PG-13 for some depictions of teenage girls in love and kissing and feeling stuff...
Feedback: It's addictive, and I like it. So yeah, go ahead.
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“Wow, it sounds exciting,” Diana gushed over the phone.
“Yeah, it is,” Krista agreed, smiling despite her exhaustion. She had not been prepared for the day to be so emotionally grueling. There were times during the session when it had seemed that they had practiced for nothing. Recordings were brutally honest, and every flaw that had slipped under their radar in the Hoffa’s basement had come out in stark clarity. The day seemed a series of endless retakes, and she knew that the others were feeling the same by the day’s end.
“I don’t think I could do it. Playing the same songs over and over again.”
“Yeah, I thought it’d be like practice, y’know? You play it a couple of times, and then you move on. But it’s like, when you’re recording you get more self-conscious about what you’re doing, and you mess up, and Brian stops the recording and you start over at a certain spot, but then you’re even more nervous about it and you just mess up even more. I think I might not like either of my songs any more after today.”
“Mmhmm. Soooo…” A sly note crept into Diana’s voice.
“So what?” Krista played innocent, although she had a good idea what Diana was asking.
“What happened with Taryn? Did you guys talk yet?”
Krista stretched her legs out in front of her and adjusted her position on the floor, preparing for the onslaught. Both Marshall and Diana had been adamant in their opinion that she and Taryn should talk about what happened and get past it, if for no other reason that the good of the band. “No, we didn’t. But,” she continued, cutting off what she knew was the beginning of a rant- she could almost hear Diana clamping her lips shut to keep quiet, “It was weird. Last week she didn’t say much to me at all, and it was awkward and awful, but suddenly today she starts talking to me, all normal and stuff.”
“Well, that’s good, right? Sounds like
she’s trying to get over it.”
“I guess so, if you can call giving me dirty looks ‘trying to get over it’. It was like, I’d be talking to Brian, and I’d catch her giving me these looks, like she was mad that he was talking to me and not to her. I almost wanted to yell ‘I’m a lesbian, stupid! You can have him!’” Diana laughed, and she couldn’t stop a small chuckle from escaping her. The whole situation was so ridiculous: she was mooning over Taryn, and Taryn thought she was trying to horn in on Brian. “God, it’s so frustrating.”
“Nothing that a little honesty couldn’t fix,” Diana snarked.
Krista blew a raspberry in response.
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Sunday the group returned to Phoenix. They spent the first part of the day polishing up leftover rough spots from the previous day’s work. They took a short break to eat lunch at the Student Center, where their attempts at planning the rest of their afternoon were failing- miserably.
“Hey, could you pay a little attention?” Krista asked frowning in annoyance. Jay met her look with guilty eyes; Sergio merely smirked and shrugged.
“I can’t help it. I’m a man.”
“You’re a tool,” she retorted. He smiled and shrugged again, unfazed.
“Guys, come on. We don’t have a lot of time to get this done.” Taryn attempted to keep the peace between her bandmates; she could see that Krista was less than amused. They were supposed to be discussing the recordings and getting their ideas to together for the mastering process that would happen after their break. No sooner had they entered the building, however, than Jay and Sergio had risked serious neck injuries, constantly twisting and turning their heads to get a better view of the many coeds who had come out for lunch. Even as the boys gave in and leaned over the piece of notebook paper upon which they had been jotting their ideas, Taryn found her curiosity getting the better of her, and her own eyes roamed the room. She watched as groups of women passed by, observing every detail: their hair, their eyes---their bodies. She was curious to see if she found any of them attractive, if she felt anything by looking at them.
And what does it mean if I do, she wondered, averting her gaze as one woman almost caught her staring. She was uncertain of what she was trying to prove to herself in the impromptu experiment. Was she hoping that another woman would make her heart thump the way Krista did? Or was she hoping that her attraction, her feelings, for Krista was an anomaly.
“Taryn?” Her head snapped back to the table and met the eyes of her brother, who was looking at her with barely disguised amusement. “Care to join us?”
Her heart raced as she realized that everyone at the table was looking at her- including Krista. Had she been caught? Did they know?
“See? Here you are lecturing us, and you’re checking out guys,” Sergio crowed. He gave Jay a look as if to say ‘Can you believe this?’, and they laughed at her discomfort.
“I wasn’t---,” she began, and stopped herself. She couldn’t bring herself to meet Krista’s eyes, but she felt her gaze upon her face.
Great. “Never mind. Let’s get back to it.” She returned her attention to the paper pointedly, and was grateful when Jay and Sergio seemed content to let it be and joined her. They spent the remainder of lunch finalizing their thoughts on the final mix, heading back to the studio to master the recording with Brian and have a new demo under their belts.
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"What's that smell?" Jay sniffed the air in suspicion as he stepped through the front door. Taryn and Krista entered behind him, looking around in confusion.
"Mom?" Taryn called.
"In here!"
Taryn and Jay looked at each other, their faces questions, and walked towards the source of their mother's voice. Krista followed a few steps behind. "What's wrong?" she asked. "Is that spaghetti?"
The Hoffa siblings stepped into their kitchen and stopped in surprise, nearly causing Krista to plow into them. There was silence as they took in the scene before them. Cheryl Hoffa stood in front of the open oven, removing a large casserole dish. She placed the hot glass on top of the stove and threw a glance at the gathering. "Close your mouths! You're gaping!"
"What are you doing? Are you
cooking?!" Taryn asked, staring in disbelief.
"You never cook," Jay chimed in.
"I thought I would tonight. It's a special occasion." She removed her oven mitts, and leaned over to smell her creation. "And a great opportunity to use one of my cookbooks. I don't have to reduce any of the measurements. I don't know why they write them with so many servings. It's infinitely simpler to augment a recipe than to reduce it."
Taryn looked at her brother, who shrugged helplessly and asked, "What're you making?"
"Umm…" Cheryl walked to the center aisle and consulted her open cookbook. "Potato kale casserole." She turned and smiled proudly at them.
"Oh my God." Taryn went to the cupboards and started to rummage through them.
"What are you looking for?"
"A back-up."
"Very funny. Why don’t you make yourself useful and get out some silverware and plates."
"Alright, but this is not a good idea," Taryn warned, and removed a stack of plates from the cabinet, which she handed off to Jay.
"We could lose all of our friends after this," Jay muttered.
"I heard that!" Cheryl pointed at Krista, who was trying to stifle a giggle. "Go on. You help too."
"Yes ma'am."
The teens grabbed the necessary dinnerware and took it into the dining room where they prepared the table for dinner. Jay and Taryn chatted easily as they worked. Krista chimed in when she was addressed, but otherwise remained quiet. She was nervous about the impending evening. They were having a listening party of sorts at the Hoffa household, an idea born of Sergio's brainstorm coming back from Phoenix on Sunday. Brian had given them a cd of their demo and advised them to listen to the mix at home, away from the expensive sound equipment of the university and to give themselves a little window between actually recording the music and evaluating the sound. Sergio thought it would be a good idea to gather up some of their friends for fresh ears. Krista would have preferred to keep it within the band.
Stupid Sergio and his stupid ideas. Of course, they would have had to put it out there eventually, but---
"Hello? Krista?" Her head snapped up in surprise as she realized that Jay was standing in front of her, waving his hand in an attempt to get her attention.
"Sorry. I was…zoning, I guess."
"I was just talking about the jazz trio. I asked how you thought the rehearsal went?"
"Oh, it was great," she gushed. She was speaking honestly; the rehearsal had gone very well, despite her initial misgivings about spending extra time with Taryn. Tension was present when she first walked into the jazz room, but as soon as they had started playing their focus was on the music, and interpersonal problems had been forgotten- or at least temporarily ignored.
"Great? That's it? What did you think about---"
"Leave her alone, Jay," Taryn interjected. She fixed Krista with a searching gaze. "You're nervous, aren't you?" Krista gaped in surprise; how did she know her so well?
Jay looked from girl to girl in confusion. "Nervous? What would she be nervous about?"
"Nothing." She shook her head dismissively and refused to meet Taryn's eyes. The time for that kind of intimacy had passed. She was amenable to the idea of trying to reestablish their friendship- to a certain level. Her feelings were too raw to allow anything more.
The chiming of the doorbell cut the strained atmosphere, and Jay excused himself to answer it. He seemed almost relieved to be able to leave.
Gotta watch that, she thought as she placed the last of her silverware on the table.
It would suck if he knew what happened. She looked around for a means of escape. It had been some time since she and Taryn were alone, and she was not feeling too comfortable with the situation. She was saved the trouble.
"I'll go see if mom needs some help," Taryn said, her voice small. Krista watched her as she went into the kitchen.
Chattering voices announced the arrival of their first guests, their test audience. Shelly and Candace entered, and Krista went to greet them. Their arrival started the flow; Sergio showed up shortly thereafter with Will, whom he introduced as a classmate from Chelton; Billy was next, and Krista realized that they were in the same Biology class. She was chatting with the group, gathered around the dining room table, when she felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned to find Marshall standing behind her.
"Hey! Glad you could make it," she greeted, favoring him with a hug.
"Marshall. Hi." Krista turned, one arm still around Marshall; Taryn was emerging from the kitchen. She had an odd look on her face as she regarded them.
"Hey. What smells good?"
"My mom's cooking," she said. Her voice sounded strained. "Um, how did you…I mean, I meant to call you and ask you to come but I forgot."
"Krista invited me."
"Oh. Well, good."
Krista watched the interaction, confused at Taryn's attitude.
I thought she liked Marshall. She had no more time to ponder it, though, as Cheryl chose that moment to come into the dining room, steaming casserole dish in hand.
"Everything's ready? Are we all here?" She placed the dish in the center of the table and looked around. On cue the doorbell rang, announcing the last arrivals of the evening. Krista's shoulders slumped and she disengaged herself from Marshall and turned to greet her parents.
"Bill, Janice, so nice to see you again," Cheryl said, moving forward to shake their hands.
"Thank you. It's nice to see you too." Janice looked at her daughter. "We're very excited to hear what it is Krista's been working on."
"Yeah. I want to see if she takes after her old man," Bill said, advancing into the room and giving Krista's shoulder a squeeze. She grimaced and turned away in embarrassment. This was doing nothing to dispel her unease about her parents' presence for the evening. She had had no choice but to tell them what the evening was about since it meant missing dinner at her house, and they had surprised her by suggesting that they come too. She had tried to dissuade them, but they claimed eagerness to hear the results, and would not listen to her protests.
"Well, dinner's all set, so shall we?" Cheryl gestured to the table, and the room of people made their way to their seats. Dinner was a rather raucous affair, and Krista suspected that just about everything in the Hoffa household was. Conversation was plentiful, and she was surprised to find herself participating in it wholeheartedly, sharing jokes and jibes with the others as if she acted this way all the time. The adults conversed amongst themselves as usual, with occasional attempts to join in the teens' conversation. Cheryl's meal was actually very good, despite the teasing she received from her offspring about her skills in the kitchen, and there were no leftovers to be seen by the end of the meal. Everyone joined assisted with the cleanup, and when they were done Cheryl portioned out slices of cheesecake (not homemade) for everyone to take with them into the den where they would listen to the recording.
While the gathering settled in, some seating themselves on the floor, Jay passed out sheets of paper and pens, which he informed them were to be used to jot down notes if they needed. Krista settled herself on the floor with the stereo to one side of her and Marshall on the other. She sat with her legs crossed, her hands massaging her knees as her nervousness grew. She watched as Jay placed the cd into the stereo and picked up the remote.
"Okay," he started, turning to face the room, "what we're looking for here isn't criticism about the songs or the instruments or anything like that, cause we're done recording, and it's kinda too late to go back and change any of that stuff. We want your opinion on the sound quality. Like, if something sounds too loud, or isn't loud enough, or the balance seems off…stuff like that. Okay?"
The room nodded in understanding.
"Cool. Q demo take one then." He sat, pointed the remote at the stereo, and pressed 'Play'.
For the next 20 minutes the room was silent save for the music emanating from the stereo. Krista kept her eyes fixed on the floor in front of her, not wanting to see anyone's reaction. She was having a hard time listening to the recording, and waited with bated breath during the intervals between the songs. She was terrified of hearing a bad note, a cracking vocal- anything wrong. Her shoulders were tense with anticipation. As the time passed, however, she found herself relaxing as note by note, the songs seemed to be nearly flawless. She still did not dare look at anyone, but she began to feel more confident in the quality of what they had done, even allowing herself to nod her head in time with the music. By the time the last note was played, she was smiling with pride. They had done well. She had some ideas for the mixing, but no complaints on the quality of their performance.
It seemed the others felt the same as she was brought out of her reverie by the sound of clapping as the non-band members in the room expressed their enjoyment. She blushed, unused to such attention. Marshall elbowed her and grinned widely at her. "Wow. You guys…that was awesome."
"Yeah, you were tight!"
"When can I get a copy?"
"The quality was excellent."
The room was abuzz as everyone laid on the compliments, and Jay raised his hands for attention. Smiling, he said, "Thanks, you guys, but, y'know, what'd you think of the mixing? Any ideas for improvement? Is it fine like it is?"
"Well, on the second track, that guitar solo? It was a little too loud, like it was overly distorted," Billy commented, looking around as if nervous to express his opinion. The others quickly joined in though and voiced their agreement, and with that the ice was broken and people began to freely comment on the areas that they felt could use improvement. Jay feverishly jotted down the suggestions, and the band discussed the points as they came up.
The conversation was beginning to die down when Cheryl said, "I'd like to hear Krista's backing vocals a little more on that last song."
"Yeah, I was thinking that too," Taryn agreed. There were nods around the room, and Krista pressed her lips together and shrugged, unsure of how to act under the attention. She had had the same opinion, but thought it unwise to agree lest it should seem egotistical.
"I had no idea that you…had this in you," her father said, looking at her in awe. "You amaze me." Her mother, seated beside him, shook her head as in disbelief.
"You are so talented. I mean, you all are," she amended, her glance sweeping the room to include the other band members, "but Kris, this is a quite a departure from jazz band."
Krista smiled and was about to respond when Shelley interrupted. "I know. She comes off as so shy and quiet, and then when she performed at the party I was like, 'Who is that?'"
Oh no. Krista's mind froze, and the smile on her lips faded. She closed her eyes as she heard her mother ask, "What party?" And just like that, the room was silent. She sat still, her thoughts warring. Part of her wanted to throw herself across the room at Shelley to beat her senseless, while the other wanted to jump up and run as far away as possible.
"Oh…umm…" Shelley stammered. Krista finally opened her eyes to level her gaze on Shelley, who was looking at her, wide-eyed and mouth open in surprise. She could feel everyone's gaze on her, could almost feel the sympathy issuing forth from them. She was in big trouble.
"Krista?" She sighed, knowing there was no way out of it. Even if she could have thought of some big excuse, some way to cover up Shelley's slip, the time had long passed where it could have helped. She turned to her parents.
"Halloween."
There was a brief pause, and she watched as her mother's lips tightened, saw her father's eyes narrow, as they comprehended what that single word meant. Her father cleared his throat and stood. "I think it's probably time for us to go home." He turned to Cheryl. "Thank you for dinner." His voice was cold, and she winced as both of her parents turned disapproving eyes on Taryn and Jay.
Cheryl nodded wordlessly. Krista rose from the floor to stand by her parents. She couldn't bring herself to say good-bye to anyone; her eyes were glued to the floor. She was both mortified and frightened.
I'm going to be grounded for years for this, she thought, following her parents as they made their hasty escape from the Hoffa house.
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