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 Post subject: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 02, 2003 8:45 pm 
This is something i wrote when i was a teenager, and i was going through a bad time. I had a few other problems that might come up in my other poems if i ever find them.

Here it is.



My Quiet Rage.



The mask hides my rage,

you never see it,

It's in a cage.

This happy mask that I wear,

Has never shown the pain,

If you even care.

Inside me is a storm,

Always a raging storm,

And there was never any calm.

This quiet rage will never go away,

Too bad my self-control didn't stay.

I've lost myself in that rage.

And there was so much of it.

I had to let it out.

The anger burns me on the inside,

I don't know what to do,

But hurt on the outside

The results of my rage are unseen,

I cover them when they are clean,

And the blood is washed away.

I feel better but only for a little while,

Until another feeling of anger,

Makes my mind turn vile,

But the anger blocks the pain,

So I'll never feel a thing.





Ok, that's it. That's what was inside my head in my teen years. It scares me now, that I could ever do what I did to myself. Anyway, if you don't like it, just tell me and i'll fix it. If you do like it then thanx for actually reading it. I may have more on the way if i can find where i stored them.

See ya,

Redvampire





Edited by: RedVampire at: 9/13/03 12:26 pm


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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Tue Jun 03, 2003 2:46 am 
That's pretty dark,thanks for sharing :read



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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Tue Jun 03, 2003 6:37 am 
Wow... :paranoid



That was veery scary and angsty... but I liked it ;)



Though, it's good that you've overcome that teenage time :grin



Thanks for sharing and I'd like to read more, since this poem is really interesting, I hope there are more :pray



Thanks :moo



:peace -Viv-

Medicine, law, banking – these are necessary to sustain life. But poetry, romance. love, beauty? These are what we stay alive for!



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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Wed Jun 04, 2003 10:59 am 
Wow, people actually read it? Thank you, People!



SJ- Glad you liked it! It was dark but that's what I was feeling at the time. Hell, I even scared myself half the time with my own thoughts. But I'm over it.



PACOU- I'm glad you liked it. My family was so happy when I hit my twenties and decided that I didn't want to live in the dark anymore. I was much happier for it.



I found one of my other poems, and it's called Lost At Sea.

It's about an ex-girlfriend that left me without a word.



Lost At Sea

You left me here

Drowning in my tears.

No one can offer the comfort

That you can give.

Why is it cold, so cold?

Where am I?

The sun has disappeared

And it's not coming back.

You left me here

In the dark

Those cold tears surround me.

Lost ships of past and forgotten love

Sail aimlessly through tears cried by thousands.

But I have no ship

And I'm drowning in my tears.





Ok, hope you like this one too. Now I gotta go, there's a storm that's right over my house and I don't want to have my computer struck by lightning.

Peace out,

Redvampire

Edited by: RedVampire at: 7/18/04 1:37 pm


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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Wed Jun 04, 2003 12:05 pm 
OMG :thud



Now that was even better :grin I REALLY, REALLY liked it ;)



I can really understand what you mean, well, I was never left without words but I understand the desperation that you've felt :sigh



Thanks for sharing :)



:peace -Viv-





Medicine, law, banking – these are necessary to sustain life. But poetry, romance. love, beauty? These are what we stay alive for!



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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Thu Jun 05, 2003 12:56 am 
Wow :bow

You have a real talent,great use of words :clap





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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Thu Jun 05, 2003 11:23 am 
Hey! Feedback! It's a wonderful thing.

PACOU- I'm gonna take a shot in the dark here, You're name is Viv, right? lol. I'm glad that you liked this one too. I'm also glad that you were never left without words, it's something that no one should have to go through.



SJ- That great use of words came from all the english teachers I ever had. When I was actually paying attention, I learned stuff, lol.



Anyway, I don't have anything else today but hopefully tomorrow.

Have A Nice Day!

RedVampire



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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 09, 2003 10:06 pm 
That first poem was dark & haunting. I loved it. i'm sure many of us can identify with being in the dark, unfortunately not all of us can be quite so eloquent about it. :spin Also, I too loved how you spun your words in "Lost at Sea", I could feel the raw pain in every line. Thanx so much for sharing.

"Oh, I'm never really nice," Anya replied matter-of-factly. "I'm just the voice of truth in a world of artifice and social convention -On Second Thought, by AntigoneUnbound



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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Tue Jun 10, 2003 7:06 pm 
Wow, those are very powerful poems. I know that I can relate to it. If you can find more please keep sharing them with us.



Best of Wishes,

Shanna



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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 16, 2003 8:22 pm 
Just dropped in cuz my computer sucks and doesn't want to work(:rage ) for very long so I have to be quick. I love seeing feedback. I have another poem, its short but I like it. It's not quite as dark but mentions death.



Life Questions



I sit alone on a hill

Staring at the empty sky

Where they say the answers wait for us

Way up there so high

Its written in the stars

And drawn on the moon

Pictures unseen and words unread

All revealed as lives pass

Unknown in life will be known in death

And peace of mind is all that's left




Hope everyone likes this one.

Good night Kittens.:moo

Redvampire

Edited by: RedVampire at: 6/16/03 8:48 pm


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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Tue Jun 17, 2003 11:44 am 
Wow RedVampire :thud



The whole poem was just...*left speechless here*



The images that you've described...so powerful and with a great use of words... :grin



Really, I'm veeery impressed :)



Thanks for sharing, I hope to see more soon :lol



:peace -Viv-

Medicine, law, banking – these are necessary to sustain life. But poetry, romance. love, beauty? These are what we stay alive for!



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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Wed Jun 18, 2003 12:33 am 
Great poem :bounce



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 Post subject: yippee i updated.
PostPosted: Sat Sep 13, 2003 1:48 pm 
Well its been almost 3 months since i updated. Long time. I thank the people who reviewed. I'm glad you actually read what i had to write. oh speaking of poems. Here's one.





Anger In My SkinMy heart is cold as ice

My mind, black with anger

The hatred is so nice

It made me feel,

Feel like I never did

And I hate you so much

That it feels good inside

For once I don't have sadness

Holding my soul down

All I have is my anger

Hot as Hell's fire

Seeped into my blood

Endless wounds that will not heal

But you can't see them

They're inside of me

Never to go away



Ok, so it's depressing. But I've never written happy poems. I'm just not a happy person.

Anyways. I'm sorry for not updating in so long. I just got busy with life and house things that needed to be fixed. No I have no money. :(

Laters.

Redvampire



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 Post subject: Re: yippee i updated.
PostPosted: Sun Sep 14, 2003 4:49 am 
Glad you posted a new poem :)

Doesn't matter that it's not a happy poem,like that poem a lot :clap

Passionate,expressive writing :read



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 Post subject: your poems
PostPosted: Sun Sep 14, 2003 1:02 pm 
I'm enjoying your poetry. Very raw. It's nice to see brutal honesty put down in words. But I am glad to hear that you are a happier person now. Depression makes for wonderful art, but lousy quality of living. Keep writing your poems be they happy or sad.



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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Thu Dec 11, 2003 5:37 pm 
Oh God. It's been a very long time since i've been to the board. I'M SORRY. If anyone is still checking this thread, i'm sorry for not updating! my computer got a killer virus thingy and DIED. I had to find a cheap one that moved faster than molasses, then i had to get the money to pay for it. But anyway, Thank you to everyone who reviewed the last poem. Nothing new right now, Christmas is too close, but i'll update shortly after New years. Thanks! Happy holidays everyone!!

Much love and thanks.

Redvampire



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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Fri Dec 12, 2003 3:02 pm 
Well, RedVampire, in fact I still do read lol And I bet a lot other kitties do, too :grin



Well, I liked that last one, I've kinda missed reading it :blush



Although I have to agree with you, dark, very depressing stuff :paranoid I hope your life gets better soon so that you'll please us with happier poems every now and then, too ;) Happiness can be a good thing lol



Thanks for sharing those private feelings :)



:peace -Viv-

"Love is an irresistable desire to be irresistably desired."
Robert Frost



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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Fri Dec 12, 2003 4:41 pm 
WOW!!! :eek . That was some strong writing. I see you are awesome at writing with anger. I wonder what happened if you wrote something in a happy state??? I know that you said that you don't write anything in a happy mood, but I was just wondering. Anyhoo, I'm impressed with your update. Really, I am. As Pacou said, I pray that something great, awesome, fully of happy-happy joy-joy, comes your way soon. Once again, great update. =)

Aaron

'TaraBaby77'


"It's about two people,
regardless of sex, who love each other and treat each other with compassion and
respect."



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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Wed Dec 17, 2003 9:34 am 
I see you also write with passion in your words well done



from

Buffy Willow

Buffy Willow H



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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Fri Jan 16, 2004 8:08 pm 
Thanks to everyone who reviewed, i'm just popping in to leave something behind, i gotta go to work.

Okay, its after New Years, and guess what? I HAVE A HAPPY POEM. Well, more like a little rhyme. Its about five lines and doesn't talk about death, blood or depression. Heh. Heres the poem, rhyme thingy.





I'll make you mine

You'll make me yours.

We'll make love tonight.

So kiss me baby

And hold me tight.



It doesn't have a title, its just there. Maybe i'll give it a title later, i haven't decided.

later,

Redvampire



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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Sat Jan 17, 2004 1:45 am 
Nice poem :read



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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 3:32 pm 
Hello people... i hope there's still people checking this. I know i haven't updated. I have reasons for that though. I had not one death in the family, but two. Two of my uncles died of cancer within three months of eachother and my mother is a total wreck. Her only brothers are gone forever, and they were always so close to eachother. So I was staying with my mom for a while to help her out a little. But she insisted she was fine, so I came home.

I don't have any poems to post now, but hopefully next week.

Gotta go clean out my moldy fridge.

Sincerely,

Redvampire



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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Mon May 31, 2004 1:47 am 
Sending condolances to you and your family.





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 Post subject: Re: A poem from my depression.
PostPosted: Mon Sep 06, 2004 2:35 pm 
Sorry to hear about you loses. My condolances to you and your family.



I also really like your poems and words. They show an edge, something raw and real that seems to strike a nerve in me. Thanks for sharing.



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