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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 4/12/12)
PostPosted: Sun Apr 15, 2012 4:41 am 
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8. Vixen
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Yay for great update-y goodness... I'm really glad that Tara is talking honestly to her therapist... I really hope that they can work on her control issues and that she mentions them to Willow... I hope Tara and Willow very soon have a honest talk about their fears and feelings... I kinda hope that snuggle-therapy is key to their reconnecting and realizing that they really love each other and can slowly work their way into experessing that love physically...


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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 4/12/12)
PostPosted: Sun Apr 15, 2012 4:27 pm 
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32. Kisses and Gay Love
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Wow. Two quick updates. Cool and welcome back. The first was sort of nice. A bit of catch up. The second I really enjoyed. I think Tara has found a good therapist. It's almost a little like the two girls needs to start dating and see where that goes. They're both surprised to have each other and suddenly they have this new but very serious relationship. The sort of need to see if they can "fit in each other's lives" because they have lived very different lives for the last year or more. I am very interested to see what happens next and next and next.


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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 4/12/12)
PostPosted: Sat May 19, 2012 12:07 pm 
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1. Blessed Wannabe

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I just found this a couple of days ago and I absolutely love this story!! I can't wait to read the next post!! :) :banana


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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 4/12/12)
PostPosted: Fri Jul 20, 2012 3:46 pm 
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6. Sassy Eggs

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Interlude

Willow’s plan had been that she would take a quick nap and then go back to Tara for some possible “snuggle time”. But when she woke up from her headache induced sleep, it was very dark, and the lights were all out within the house, over the garage, and basically all over the neighborhood. Willow looked at the clock. The bright red letters glowed 3:25.

Shit, thought Willow. If there is any time in the world that I hate it is the hours between 3 and 5 in the morning. It is too early to get up, but often too late to keep the chatter of my anxiety at bay. Willow began to ruminate about her current worries. Rather than lay in bed, she decided to get up and write in her journal. During one of her myriad of therapies, she had learned how to identify and evaluate her thoughts, feelings and sensations. She started with the sensations. She decided to take an emotional inventory like she had learned in treatment. She focused on what she was sensing: She went through her body systems and wrote them down like an inventory.

Feet: itchy, want to move.

Legs: Knees feel funny tingly, as does my lower torso. Desire to get up and run, but too tired to.

Stomach: feels like thousands of little fireflies inside her stomach; nauseated,

Upper body: nauseated, tingly.

Neck: Heavy, like there is something hanging on the back of my neck.

Head: Tingly, tired, like it has cotton in it.

Then she wrote down:

Feelings usually associated with these sensations.

Negative: Fear, anxiety, scared, sick, worried,

Positive: Excitement, kind of like waiting for a date,

Thoughts:

I am worried that when I get to school they won’t let me register.

I am scared about having to tell people why I left.

I am scared that I have forgotten everything I learned and will have to start over.

I am worried that Professor Giles will not have a place for me in my research team.

I am worried that my parents are going to find me and figure out a way to make me leave.

I am scared that Aunt Joyce is going to decide she doesn’t want to get between my parents and
me.

I am worried that Tara is going to decide that I am not worth the trouble and I will be living here and watching her get on with her life.

I am worried that Tara is going to decide that I am worth the trouble and I am going to freak.

I am scared to have a relationship.

I am scared to get close to another person.

I worry I suck at being a girlfriend.

I am afraid that I will never graduate from college.

I am afraid that I will disappoint Aunt Joyce and Tara.

She then wrote in BIG, BOLD, letters

I AM TERRIFIED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Willow looked down at what she had written. Ok, it seems that scared or worried is the predominant emotion. Which of these things can I change: They have to let me register or tell me how or what I need to do to register. The worst thing that can happen is that they say I can’t come back until the fall. If that happens I will get a job and chill here. If people ask me why I left, I can tell them the truth, or that I got sick, or ask why they want to know…and as my therapist kept saying, most people really don’t give a shit about you or notice you are gone unless you were an important person to them. All the important people already know, so I really don’t have to tell anyone anything. I am pretty sure that I have not forgotten everything. I was reading the Bioorganic Chemistry journal and understood everything in it. So I have not lost all my brains. Plus, what is the worst thing, I could start college all over again, I AM only 18. Maybe I could study psychology or something….No, I really want to be a chemist. They will not make me start college over…She looked back at the list. If Dr. Giles does not have a place on his research team, then I will join another one…there is plenty of good research going on. Anyone who had me on their team would be lucky. Yeah, right...Positive thoughts Rosenberg…the real ones…I am almost positive that Aunt Joyce will help me fight my parents if they come and try to get me. Maybe I need to meet with a lawyer or someone to figure out legal protections. I am pretty sure that they could not claim I am incompetent and get guardianship. It will not happen. They have never worked hard to keep in touch with me, why would they start now? Aunt Joyce: She bought a house near the university so I could stay here. She made a room for me. She sent me money. All of these things are indicators that she wants me around and is not placating me, and if she does, I will figure out somewhere to live and I will be Ok. I am a survivor. …Willow blew out air from her mouth and looked at the last few fears. What can I do about them….I have no control over whether or not Tara likes me or decides to stay with me. I can survive it if we break up, and if it is too hard, I can move…but there are no indicators that she does not like me. I will not freak out if she does not want to be with me. I will be sad, I will be upset, but for months I have been preparing myself to find Tara and discover that she has moved on. I wasn’t even sure that I would find her. So I have now, it seems good. I need to focus on the present not the future. Relationships are SCARY. My therapist always said that. She assured me that they would be worth it. One day at a time Rosenberg, one day at a time, you won’t do this relationship thing perfectly, but you can do it…She sighed again, and looked at the end of the list. She was getting sleepy again. Um…will graduate from college, when? Where? Not known, but will do it. I will disappoint Aunt Joyce and Tara, but if they love me, we will get over it.

Willow got up from her desk, closed her journal, turned off the light and got back to bed. She closed her eyes and tried to think of the serene place she had created in her mind during meditation sessions, and fell back to sleep.

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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 7/20/2012
PostPosted: Sat Jul 21, 2012 7:30 am 
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Yay for great update-y goodness... Yay for great inside look on what's in Willow's brain right now... I really hope that Willow & Tara start to spend their time together and begin to have small almost accidental touches to build confidence and hope for their future together...

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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 7/20/2012
PostPosted: Sun Jul 22, 2012 3:25 am 
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I really enjoyed that. It seemed like a very good therapeutic exercise for Willow. Certainly it let her think clearly and go back to sleep. And in terms of writing, it did a very good job of reminding the reader what is going on/where we are and tiding us over.

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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 7/20/2012
PostPosted: Sat Sep 22, 2012 7:13 pm 
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6. Sassy Eggs

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Part 72

It had been a long day. It had seemed like the time had dragged more than usual during work, and then she had therapy. Tara was looking forward to getting home, changing her clothes and finding out how Willow’s day had gone. She had been surprised when Willow hadn’t come back to her apartment after taking a nap, but figured that she had really zonked out. She’d tried to stay awake, but her own fatigue had taken over, as well as, the knowledge that 6AM would come quickly.
Tara was still feeling discombobulated from her therapy session, and her knowledge that she needed to talk to Willow about how she was feeling, and what she was thinking. She was pondering this as she walked up the stairs and into her apartment. Willow must have seen her walking up the driveway, because before she could even take off her shoes, there was a knock at the door.

“Come in.” she called from the kitchen chair that she was sitting on to take off her shoes.

“So do you not even ask who it is before you tell someone to ‘come in’?” asked Willow as she walked in the door an plopped herself onto the futon.

“Nobody but your or Joyce has ever come up to my door. So it has never been an issue. How did everything go? I was thinking about you all day, wondering what had happened.”

“So that is why I kept getting those shivers… It went pretty well. I went to see Dr. Giles before I went to the registrar so I’d know if I was going to be able to be on his research team, and thus whether I needed to register for independent study. It was really great to see him again.”

“So what was the answer?”

“He said that he’d missed me and that there would always be room on his team for me. He apologized that there wasn’t any money for a stipend, but promised next year he’d be able to get one. I assured him that I was ok right now.”

“That is good. So how ‘bout registering?”

“Well, I guess they had some sort of “flag” on me, so I had to meet with the dean before I could register. I had to sit and wait to talk to her for almost 2 hours. I was glad that I had brought a book. Once I finally got to see her, she told me that I’d have to be cleared by student health services. I figured that it was just medically, but once I got there they made me meet with the head of mental health services and medical services.

“How did that go?”

“The medical was a piece of cake. Everything is good with the old “ticker”. The mental health was a little trickier, I had to agree to meet with a counselor weekly and agree if I didn’t make my appointments then I couldn’t stay enrolled.”

“They can do that?”

“I guess so… I figured that I’d talked to enough counselors in my life, one more couldn’t hurt. I suspect that it will be some grad student. I can shoot the shit. I suspect that I’m an interesting case. If I was a counseling student, I’d be interested in me.” Willow laughed.

“I’d say so. I know I am interested in you.” Tara went over and sat next to Willow.

“So how was your day?”

“Same old, same old. Speaking of counselors, I met with my therapist today. That’s why I was so late getting home.”

“I was wondering if you always get home so late. I asked Aunt Joyce, but she said that she never quite knew what you schedule was. She said that in the summer, you were home before dark, but that she wasn’t sure now that it was getting dark so early.”

“I am usually home by 6:30ish. A lot has to do with the bus routes and whether they are running on time. “

“Yeah, I noticed that they seem to run on their own schedule, rather than the posted one. “

“It gives me time to read. Not that I haven’t had plenty of time to read anyway…”

“There is never plenty of time to read in my opinion” Willow paused, “Is what you mean that you had a lot of free time. There was a pause and then Willow began again. “Oh, am I getting in the way of your free time. Me and the old ‘I’ll just go up and see her’. Maybe you want to have some time to yourself. Should I call first? Wait for you to invite me over? What do you want the parameters to be? Just tell me and I will follow them.”

Tara shut Willow up with the tried and true method. She covered the babbling mouth with her own and after a moment she felt Willow melting into the kiss. She could almost feel the anxiety leaving the small redhead woman’s body as she felt her tongue gently probing her own mouth. Tara too relaxed into the kiss and tried to remain in the present rather than to allow the anxieties that had plagued her during therapy to resurface. However, as usual, the more she tried to relax, the more the anxiety reared its ugly head.

Tara gently pulled away.

“What is the matter?” said a slightly dazed Willow.

“Wil, we need to talk.”

“Oh shit,”

Tara realized how the words had sounded so she quickly began again, “No, not that kind of ‘we have to talk’, just the real, I just think we need to talk some about what we both want, what ARE the parameters. How do we want to negotiate this?” she gestured to the two of them and the house.

Tara saw Willow shake her head and she moved a bit further away from Tara.

“Ok.” She said quietly.

“Sweetie, it is ok. It’s just that I was in therapy and she suggested that we talk.”

“About what?”

“About us.”

“Is there still and ‘us’? Do you want to be a part of an ‘us’? I hope you do, because I’d be really sad if there wasn’t an ‘us’. But if you don’t want us to be an ‘us’, I will figure out how to not be a part of ‘us’.”

Tara put her head in her hands.

“What is the matter? Did I say something wrong? It is all this ‘us’ talk isn’t it.”

Tara looked up, “Sh…calm down Willow. Obviously I have not done a good job trying to communicate what I want to talk about. Maybe I should just tell you a little about what I was talking to Carolyn, my therapist, about, ok?”

“Ok.” Willow sunk into the couch.

“Ok. It probably would be easier, if you can, I know that it will be hard, but if you can..just let me tell you when I am done, you can ask questions, ok?”

“Ok.”

“First we were talking about how you just showing up on the doorstep kind of threw me for a loop. She thinks it is about control, but I was just talking about how I keep on worrying about what could have happened to you if Joyce wasn’t home.”

“But she was. Sorry.” Willow put her hand over her mouth.

“It is ok. I know…I guess I just wish I’d had some warning that you were coming. “ Tara saw Willow struggling with wanting to make a comment. “I know, you didn’t even know I lived her. So how could you have known to warn me? It is just how I feel. I wish I had been better prepared. I feel like…It’s just…I worry. “

Tara saw Willow’s body leaning in. Listening to her every word… just cut to the chase Maclay. “ You may be...here we are…and now we can have a real relationship finally and a real relationship includes…this is hard…

“What is hard?” asked Willow quietly.

“I am not ready to have sex.” Tara exclaimed and burst into tears.

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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 9/22/2012)
PostPosted: Sun Sep 23, 2012 2:52 am 
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Yay for excellent update-y goodness... I'm really glad that they have really started to talk about the important stuff... I'm pretty sure that neither of them is really ready to have sex yet. they both need lots of therapy before they are able to express their feelings physically... I truly hope that snuggle therapy (first fully clothed and later naked snuggles) is a big part of their heeling process...

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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 9/22/2012)
PostPosted: Sun Sep 30, 2012 5:03 pm 
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Good job kids: communication is key. I'm glad that they're still doing therapy (or at least Tara is) and that they've got some new coping skills. They are making good progress considering.

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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 1/1/13)
PostPosted: Tue Jan 01, 2013 3:03 pm 
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6. Sassy Eggs

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Sorry everyone for this long hiatus. My muse did take a cruise around the world and life has been busy. I’ve been struggling with relationship ending, parenthood and health concerns. I have to take a BIG exam to get my final license and I am going to try to use getting to write as my reward for studying. Thanks to all who have stuck by me and I hope I will become a more consistent “poster”. I am on medical leave for the next week, so I will try to get a few postings done.

Meeting Expectations

Part 74

Quote:
“I am not ready to have sex.” Tara exclaimed and burst into tears.


Ok Rosenberg, take a deep breath and try to focus so you can come up with a “good” comment. She seems really upset, our head is still buzzing from the reaction to the “we’ve got to talk” and our mouth is going on auto pilot…don’t go on instinct, think what is the appropriate thing to say, what is she expecting me to say? Does she think I want to have sex right now? Does she think this is a deal breaker? Why is she so upset? Did I do or say something that made her feel like I was pressuring her to have sex? She’s the one who started this kissing…Did I do something rude? I think I kept my hands ‘in an appropriate place?’ Shit,. Is she done? She asked me not to say anything until she was done? Should I ask if she is done? Is it obvious she is done? She stopped talking… Willow looked at Tara expectantly.

“Ok.”

“What do you mean ‘ok’”

Willow shrugged her shoulders. She knew that a lot could be weighing on what she said.

“Ok, if you are not ready to have sex, then we won’t have sex. I wouldn’t want to do it until you were ready. We won’t do anything until we are both ready….Did it seem I was pressuring you?”

“No…”

“You don’t sound sure of yourself? I was pressuring you, wasn’t I? I am sorry. “

Tara moved toward Willow again. “You were not pressuring me at all. If anyone was pressuring me it was me. This is all so confusing…”

“How can you be pressuring yourself?” asked Willow.

Tara blushed, “Do I really have to spell that out?”

Immediately it hit Willow. She was not the only one who probably had an active imagination about what would happen when they saw each other again. “Oh….” She winced, “sorry.”

“Nothing to be sorry about? I know often your mouth works faster than your brain.”

“I wish” Willow blurted out. Willow’s mind flew into a thought that was totally inappropriate for the situation Get your head out of the gutter

“Huh?” asked Tara and then her brain caught up as well. She began to laugh. “Ok, so maybe the first order of business is admitting that we’ve both had a lot of spare time to think about what it would be like to see each other.”

“Yup.”

“But reality is different than fantasy…”

“Yup.”

“So you have any idea how to bridge the two?”

“Nope. You?”

“Nope.”

“Well, what would we have done if I didn’t live with Joyce? But you had found me?”

“I guess depending on where you lived, I would have tried to figure out a way to see you.”

“Well, we don’t have to worry about that.”

“Then I guess I would have come to visit you or had you come here to visit”

“What if you found out that we lived near each other?”

“I guess I would have asked you to meet me for coffee or something.”

“So you would have asked me out on a date?”

“I guess.”

“That’s how I would have figured it too. I probably would have wanted to get to know you again.”

“Sort of starting from scratch?”

“Yeah, sort of.”

“I guess we can try to do that…” said Willow, but inside she was thinking that it would be like taking steps backward instead of forward.

“That would be weird now. It would be like taking steps backward instead of forward.”

“My thoughts exactly.”

There was silence again.

“Maybe it would help if we both agreed where we are?” said Tara.

“We are in your apartment...oh, not literally. Ok. Where do you feel like we are?”

“Shit this communication thing is hard.”

“Uh huh. “ Willow bit her lip and tried to think about some of the lessons she had had in treatment. She remembered an activity in which she’d had to do with a roommate to come up with agreements about the room rules. It’s worth a shot

“I know it might sound stupid, but we could each write down some things that we want or some rules or parameters that we want and then we could trade them. Makes it easier than saying them…but we have to react honestly to what the other person writes and try to not get upset….”

“I think I could do that… How about we both do that tonight and tomorrow, we can talk about it.”

“Sounds like a plan.” Willow looked at her watch, “well, I said I’d be home for dinner with Joyce. So I guess I’d better get going.”

“See you tomorrow?”

“Can’t wait.”

“Me either.” Willow hugged Tara good bye and went down the stairs.

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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 1/1/13)
PostPosted: Tue Jan 01, 2013 4:23 pm 
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Big yay for your muse coming back from the 'round the word cruise... I'm really glad that they both recognized that they weren't ready and agreed to basically start from square 1 again to really know one another...

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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 1/1/13)
PostPosted: Tue Jan 01, 2013 6:46 pm 
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Wow. It's hard to imagine how that conversation could have gone better. I love that the girls are taking the things they have learned in their lives of therapy to help them now.

Welcome back and thanks for updating.

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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 1/1/13)
PostPosted: Wed Jan 02, 2013 12:06 am 
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HI :bigwave

Even though Willow thinks it's a step back it's really a big step forward in there relationship. And are we gonna see Sheila again to create problems for Willow?

Great Update and Welcome Back!!! :)


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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 1/1/13)
PostPosted: Wed Jan 02, 2013 3:32 pm 
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75A

Tara looked down at the piece of paper in front of her. It had seemed so easy when Willow suggested it, but in actuality putting her thoughts, wishes, and expectations down on paper seemed to be more serious than actually saying them, and that was saying something because asking for what she wanted or needed was not something that she was able to do very easily.

I want…..







The blank piece of paper taunted her.

the hardest thing that I had to say was that I wasn’t ready to have sex. What do I want? I want to see her every day. I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I want to get to a place where I can be totally intimate with her. I want to share my hopes and dreams. I want to touch her. I want to sleep with her in the same bed. I want to celebrate the holidays with her. I want to grow old with her. I want to allow myself to become vulnerable and trust her. I want to support her studies, I want to see her grow and stay healthy. I want to sit and read together. I want to date her. I want her to live with me. I want to live with her. I want her to feel that this is her home too. I want to get to know her again. I want to get to know the woman who she has grown up to be. I want to not be scared. Well, she doesn’t have much to do with that Maclay. You are responsible for your own fear and anxiety. Ok you can do it. Tara approached the paper again.

I want to get to know you.
I want to go on dates.
I want to see you every day.
I want us to figure out how to navigate the fact that we live 100 yards from each other.
I want to celebrate the holidays with you.
I want to take our physical relationship slow.
I want to kiss you.
I want to hold you.
I want to sit and read and write and watch TV or movies with you.
I want us both to stay healthy physically and emotionally.
I want us to be able to be honest with each other.

I guess that is as good of a start as any

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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 1/2/13)
PostPosted: Wed Jan 02, 2013 3:50 pm 
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I like the list a lot. I'm glad she paraphrased her desires so she won't put unwanted or needed pressure on the relationship.

It's a very good start.

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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 1/2/13)
PostPosted: Wed Jan 02, 2013 8:37 pm 
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Love Tara's list and can't wait to see what Willow has on her list


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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 1/2/13)
PostPosted: Thu Jan 03, 2013 4:01 am 
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I really like Tara's list... Can't wait for Willow's list...

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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 1/2/13)
PostPosted: Thu Jan 03, 2013 10:23 am 
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Howdy! :bigwave I just started this fic today and I love it. You have done a masterful job of discussing these topics with tact and honesty. I like that that the girls haven't fallen madly into bed. There has been too much history for that to be right for the characters you have made. I'm happy too see this continuing on. I know how much real life can drain a soul.
I hope you are doing well and that we are lucky enough for more updates! :applause

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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 1/2/13)
PostPosted: Thu Jan 03, 2013 5:07 pm 
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Missocki: I am impressed that you just started the fiction today. I hope it was worth your time. I am glad that you appreciate the honesty. It would be a total paradigm shift to have the girls jump into bed.

Zampsa19752001 & Willow Friendly: Here it is

Grimm: I knew that Tara would be unable to acknowledge her bawdy side. Thanks

I look at my writing and realize that I think in very short bursts about this story. I hope this doesn’t frustrate people too much, but it seems that this is how I write…

75B

Willow sat at her desk, all of her different colored pens neatly in front of her. All though dinner with Joyce, part of her brain had been trying to figure what she would write, while the other half worked to share her busy day with her aunt. Aunt Joyce was very happy that things had gone well and seemed somewhat relieved that the school had demanded that Willow ‘do’ therapy. Her comment had been “well, school is stressful, so it will be good for you to have an objective person to talk to.” Willow figured that her comment about being a ‘fun case’ would damper her aunt’s enthusiasm, so she kept the thought to herself.

I should have a system. Red for things that I probably can’t really write, green for safe ones, blue for ideas, purple for…lesbian things…they all are lesbian things…um… purple for things that I will put in the list for sure Willow picked up the pink pen I guess I will start with those colors and see if I need pink. Should I free associate with a black pen and then circle them with the color, or should I write them in the color if I am sure? She scrunched up her face and looked at the blank piece of paper. She picked up the green pen. safe things...what is safe things. I worry that everything has the potential to be “unsafe” She put the green pen down and picked up the blue pen.

I want to see you a lot.

I want to sleep with you that could be misinterpreted She underlined it in red and purple, then remembered that she had changed the code and covered the purple with black so not to get confused.

I would like to cuddle with you sometimes. that seems safe she underlined it in purple. I have to just write and then underline.

I want us to be able to talk about things and agree about how our relationship is going to go.

I want us to stay touching above the waist.

I want to touch you everywhere.

I want to go on dates with you.

I want to share my life with you.

I want to be there for you when you have a bad day.

I want to respect your boundaries, especially around your ‘home’.

I want us to just be able to read each other’s minds.

I want to be able to read Tara’s mind so I can’t do anything that bothers or hurts her.

I sometimes wish that I could turn off my head and just listen to my body.

I am glad that my head controls my body.

I just want to be wherever she is.

I want this awkwardness to go away and to see what it is going to be like a year from now.

I want to feel comfortable and be able to be the people we are.

I want to be with Tara a year from now.

I want to be with Tara 10 years from now.

I want to be with Tara 20 years from now.

I want to be with Tara 30,40,50,60,70 years from now.

Willow looked over the things she had written, and then the multitude of pens that were on her desk.

Red

I want to sleep with you
I want to share my life with you.
I want to touch you everywhere.
I want to share my life with you.
I want us to just be able to read each other’s minds.
I want to be able to read Tara’s mind so I can’t do anything that bothers or hurts her.
I want to be with Tara a year from now.
I want to be with Tara 10 years from now.
I want to be with Tara 20 years from now.
I want to be with Tara 30,40,50,60,70 years from now.

Green

I want to see you a lot.
I would like to cuddle with you sometimes.
I want us to be able to talk about things and agree about how our relationship is going to go.
I want to go on dates with you.
I want to be there for you when you have a bad day.
I want to respect your boundaries, especially around your ‘home’.
I want to feel comfortable and be able to be the people we are.

Willow looked at the green underlined sentences and realized that the blue and purple would be superfluous. She looked in the desk and was happy to find that Aunt Joyce had left her some stationary. Willow went about copying the green onto the stationary.

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Meeting Expectations


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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 1/3/13)
PostPosted: Thu Jan 03, 2013 6:12 pm 
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7. Teeny Tinkerbell Light
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Both lists are pretty close.

Looks like they are finally on the same page.

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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 1/3/13)
PostPosted: Thu Jan 03, 2013 9:35 pm 
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8. Vixen
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I'm very glad that they both have very similar lists... It woudn't be Willow if she didn't use her "quirky" colored pens and do multiple lists... I hope that they soon (in 3 - 6 months in their time table or possibly sooner) are able to sleep in the same bed and snuggle (fully clothed)...

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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 1/3/13)
PostPosted: Fri Jan 04, 2013 7:41 am 
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7. Teeny Tinkerbell Light
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Both of them are about the same and that make things easier for them. and love how tara's made her list simple and willow made hers into a project but thats willow for yah.


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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 1/3/13)
PostPosted: Fri Jan 04, 2013 8:29 pm 
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I really loved the last chapter and subsequent lists. It looks like they're going in the right direction and that makes me very happy! After reading Willow's list I wandered back and re-read through the entire story. I started reading this fic so long ago that I'd almost forgotten everything they've been through. You've done an amazing job moving them through all the turmoil. I kinda feel like they were stuck with a gray cloud and rain over their heads and now it's all sunshine and kittens!

I think what struck me the most, list wise, was Willow's. Tara's list flowed, but Willow's seemed to be all over the place. Especially this, "I want to be able to read Tara’s mind so I can’t do anything that bothers or hurts her." It's clear that she still has some growing up to do and needs to understand that they will hurt each other, it's inevitable in any relationship, but it doesn't have to spell disaster. I can see a discussion between them over that point in particular.

Anyway, really great stuff! I look forward to much more!!

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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 1/3/13)
PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2013 5:45 pm 
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3. Flaming O
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This is a great fic & I will definitely look forward to many updates. Thank you, for writing, it's really exceptional.


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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 1/3/13)
PostPosted: Sat Jan 12, 2013 1:42 pm 
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I too am very happy that you continue this story. The different ways they aproached the list was true to their characters. I had to smile about Willow's quirkiness with her different coloured pens... But differences aside they are pretty much on the same page with the things they dare to let each other know and the things they wish secretely, and that is a very good sign for their future in my book!

I'm looking forward to the next chapter and how they will react to each others lists.


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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 5/18/13)
PostPosted: Sat May 18, 2013 7:36 pm 
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Finey McFine: I am trying to keep the fact that Willow just turned 18 in mind, and has had a very different adolescence than the average person. She does not really know how to have relationships, and has spent most of her life trying to figure out how to keep others happy. So of course that is the way that she approaches this one. I am sure that they both are going to have to discover that arguing does not mean abandonment.
Bluepaintbox: Thanks for the feedback, and I am glad you like my writing.

Wills redemption: Sorry it took so long to let you find out how they reacted. I am going to try to finish this story. I know what I want to happen, but I am not sure how to get it to occur.

Part 76

Tara had never been so glad for a day to be over. For once the buses ran on time and she was able to get home before six thirty. All day she had been thinking about what Willow’s list would contain, and how Willow would react to her own. A smile came to her face when she saw Willow sitting on the front porch. It was clear that she was trying not to look like she was sitting there waiting for Tara, but her attempt was futile. Tara could see that a big smile came onto Willow’s face when she saw her, and could see that she was exerting all the control that she could muster not to run down the walkway like an eager puppy. There was something kind of cool to know that there was someone THAT happy to see her. Tara found her steps quickening as she approached the drive way, and the two women met in the middle.

“Hi. How was your day? Seems like the bus came in a timely manner, huh?”

“Yup, right on time. My day was fine. Glad it is Friday. Yours?”

“Fine. It was weird hanging around the house with both of you gone. But I figured out how to take the bus to the library, and found a really cool coffee shop.”

“Which one?”

“Cuppa Josie”

“Yeah, that is a good place. I used to sometimes just go there to read and be ‘around’ people without having to be with people.”

“Do you want to get settled and then call me.”

“You can just come up if you want. I don’t have much to settle.”

Tara could tell that this answer pleased Willow. She opened the door for the redhead and followed her in.
“Do you mind if I take a quick shower. I feel like I am covered with kid goop.”

“No prob. Is it alright if I look at your bookshelf?”

“Of course not, have at it.”

Tara went into her bedroom, grabbed some sweats and a tee shirt and brought them into the bathroom. She was very aware of the fact that the other girl was just yards away and it made her feel tingly with anticipation. How was Willow going to react to her list, and what was going to be on her list?

Tara quickly showered and joined her girlfriend Oh my Goddess, I really have a girlfriend on my couch. Willow had found one of Tara’s myriad of lesbian novels and was a few pages into it.

“That one is ok. I’ve read better. But it is a cute story. I wish that they were a little better written.”

“It seems ok. Can I borrow it?”

“Of course. You can borrow any book you want to. “

“Cool. That goes for you too. I mean, not that I think I can borrow you, you are a person, and you can’t be borrowed. I meant that you can borrow any of my books that you’d like. Oh shoot, I am babbling. I bet you have not missed that. Crazy babbling chick here.”

Tara put her hand on Willow’s knee. “ It is ok, and actually, the babbling is something that I have frequently missed. No one can babble as well as you.”

“It’s a skill. So….”

“So what?” said Tara with a devilish grin.

“Nothing.”

Tara could see that Willow was struggling with the desire to ask whether Tara had made her list. She could see Willow pat her own pocket, where she was almost certain the other girl’s list resided.

“Ok. I thought maybe there was something you wanted to do?”

“There are a lot of things I want to do”. Willow put her hand over her mouth. “Oops, that was not supposed to slip out. “

“Shall we just get it over with?”

“What over with?”

“You know”

“I do?”

“Do you have your list?”

Willow took the well folded piece of paper out of her front pocket. “This?” she asked.

“I guess so. Tara got up and got her own list out of her desk where she had put it.”

“So how should we do this? Give the other one the list and then we will talk, or do you want to give me your list, we can talk, and then read mine and talk some more. “

“How bout we just give each other the list.” Willow handed her piece of paper to Tara, and Tara did the same. Tara opened the creased piece of paper. She looked at Willow’s signature writing, and noted that the girl had to write in several different colored pens.

I want to see you a lot. I would like to cuddle you sometimes. I want to be able to talk about things and agree about how are relationship is going to go. I want to go on dates with you. I want to be there for you when you have a bad day. I want to respect your boundaries, especially around your ‘home’. I want to feel comfortable and be able to be the people we are .

Tara was sort of surprised that the list was so short. To some extent she had expected a very long and complicated list from the other girl. She looked over at Willow to try to gauge her reaction to her list. It seemed that she was re-reading the list. Tara could almost see the wheels turning inside Willow’s head. what is she thinking?


“What do you think?” asked Tara.


“Our lists seem pretty similar, I want to kiss you and see you every day too. I just was afraid to write it, not afraid really, um...this was a lot harder than I thought it would be. “

“I know. “

Another awkward silence ensued. “Can I kiss you now?”

That would be great.

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Meeting Expectations


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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 1/3/13)
PostPosted: Sun May 19, 2013 1:32 am 
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8. Vixen
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Yay for great update-y goodness... Yay for :wtkiss ...

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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 5/18/13)
PostPosted: Mon May 20, 2013 3:10 am 
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32. Kisses and Gay Love
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I know it's because of such a history of therapy and institutionalization but they are both doing such a great job of communicating and checking boundaries. Nice update. Thanks.

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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 5/18/13)
PostPosted: Sat Aug 10, 2013 8:40 pm 
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2. Floating Rose
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I really like this story because it's different from a lot of the others- they don't really go into abuse or anything. This is not something that I read to cheer me up, but I do enjoy it and do a little 'yay' wiggle when you update :dance

I love the character Joyce; she is pretty cool. But Willow's parents I want to :smash over the head with a shovel GUH they are so annoying.
Lots of happy feelings now that Willow and Tara are :kiss1 but I guess they need to talk a lot more to get to a happy place.

Anyway my work is kinda getting :buried so I'd better go.

-Yellow

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"Alternate universes don't stay put. Trying to send him to a specific place is sort of like ... like ... trying to hit a ... puppy, by throwing a live bee at it. Which is a weird image, and you should all just forget it."
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 Post subject: Re: New Fiction: Meeting Expectations (updated 5/18/13)
PostPosted: Sat Aug 17, 2013 7:49 am 
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I like the direction they are moving in and I'm looking forward to them finally being given the chance at a healthy relationship.

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"Transform your pain. Release your past. And ... uh ... get over it."
~Willow, Where The Wild Things Are


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