Okay, here goes:
Three years ago, when the updates to this story stopped, it was one of the roughest periods of my life, and I couldn't really face this story anymore without being reminded of it. Recently, though, I can't get it out of my head - and I'd really, really like to give it the ending it deserved. This was the first, and the longest, thing I ever wrote, and I'd like to finally see it through.
So here's the first update of hopefully many, right to the end. I don't know if anyone besides me remembers this story, or is even remotely interested, but I'd like to dedicate this chapter to everyone at the KB - you were all so amazing and wonderful in helping me through my darkest hours, and I owe you all a great deal. Thank you, everyone.
Chapter 9 – Forgetting Regret
Rating: R for language, I suppose.
Disclaimer: See Chapter 1
“Lindsey, Lindsey...I vaguely remember someone with that name. Bit of a moron, from what I recall.”
“You can save the bravado, Spike. You’ll notice you’re not restrained, and that I’m not armed. I only want to talk. And while we’re on the subject, I agree – he was a moron. His continual screw-ups cost me dearly.”
“If I’m not restrained,” Spike stood up from the chair he was seated in and stretched, “and you’re not armed, then what’s to prevent me beating you senseless?”
“Not a thing. Well, okay, there is one thing. The man who’s currently waiting for my instructions.”
Spike whirled around, but the room was empty beyond the two of them. “What man?”
“Not here. He’s at the hospital with your friends.”
“Talk quickly,” Spike warned, “I’m running out of bloody patience now.”
“I want what your little witch did reversed. Or, more specifically, my new...employer does. She’s thrown the world way out of balance, and it’s not good for business.”
“If you hurt her, I promise I’ll gut you.”
“Hurt her?” the man laughed. “Dear boy – she’s the only one that can fix things, so I’m certainly not going to hurt her. What I am going to do, though, is give you a deadline. I want Tara, in Rome, by the end of next week. If she isn’t, the man I spoke of earlier is going to kill your friends. And he’s going to start with Angel.”
Spike froze. “What?”
“Don’t make me repeat myself.”
“And if I kill you? Right now?”
“Then when he doesn’t hear from me, he’ll start killing them. This is a good deal, Spike – no sacrifice required, on any of your parts. She just has to take back what she did, and I’ll call my man off. I really do suggest you take it.”
“Oh, yeah – it’s a great deal. Other than the part where we end up reopening all the hellmouths and letting the demons back onto earth. How stupid do you think I am?”
“Well, you don’t want me answering that.” Spike lunged at him, and he vanished. His voice spoke one more time, from everywhere at once. “Two weeks, Spike.”
[hr]
“Anya – this is a graveyard.”
“Congrats – you win the Captain Obvious award!” Anya’s green eyes sparkled.
“Why are we here? I thought you wanted to dance.”
“Oh, I do!” She turned away, her red hair fanning out behind her. “Come on out, little creatures of the night!” she yelled into the darkness.
“Quiet!” Dawn hissed. “Are you crazy?”
“Dawn, I have so much power. It’s half the reason I have trouble staying still, sometimes it feels like I’m vibrating with it. I’d like to burn some of it off – does that make any sense?”
“I guess, but – isn’t there a safer way?”
“Maybe. This is more fun, though.” Anya grinned, and Dawn couldn’t help but smile back at her – the teenager’s energy was infectious. The smile vanished, though, as she saw the four vampires surrounding them. “Aww,” Anya pouted, “just four? You guys are hardly even trying anymore.”
“Well, now that we can’t sire more-“ one of them began, before a look from one of the others shut him up.
“Wait,” Anya laughed, “you mean the whole ‘no more demons’ thing?”
The vampires slowed to a stop. “What do you know about it?”
“That was my mom,” Anya bragged proudly. “So, this is why we haven’t had a single report of a vampire attack since we got back in town – if you lose one, you can’t replace them!”
“You think this is funny?” the one to Anya’s left snarled. “We’re being exterminated!”
“Hold on while I boo-hoo for the poor vampires, okay?” All four of them leapt then, and Anya threw a stake in Dawn’s direction. “Hold that!” she shouted. “Come on, uglies – it’s me you want!” they came at her all at once, and she responded with a flurry of magic. One vampire went up in flames, then another. The other two turned to run, and she incinerated one of them. The other froze in place, stuck fast. “Come on over, Dawn,” Anya grinned. “Stake him.”
Standing behind the motionless vampire, Dawn slammed the stake into his back. As it pierced his heart, he crumbled into dust. Dawn grinned. “I love that.”
“See? I told you we’d have fun. Now, let’s...let’s...” Anya trailed off. Dawn followed her gaze.
“Oh, god. Anya, I’m sorry – I never thought...”
“It’s okay,” Anya tried for a casual tone, but the break in her voice gave her away. “I picked the spot, after all.”
“But I should have thought – it didn’t even occur to me. I haven’t been here since we raised Sunnydale...”
“Dawn!” Anya insisted. “It’s okay. Really. It’s...” the sudden flood of her tears seemed to surprise her nearly as much as it surprised Dawn. “It’s okay,” she repeated. “It’s just – seeing that, and I’ve been so worried about her since she disappeared...”
“Let’s go home, okay?” Anya nodded silently, taking Dawn’s offered hand. The stone behind them stood mute, but the inscription – ‘Tara Maclay’ - seemed to cry out after them. “It’s okay,” Dawn assured her. “She’s okay – that was another life.”
“I know,” Anya whispered, wiping tears away with her free hand. “I really want to see her.”
“I’ll call Buffy when we get home, okay? I’ll see if you can get her on the phone. I know it’s not as good as seeing her...”
“It’s as close as I’ll get for a while, though – thank you, Dawnie. You’re...you’ve been amazing to me. Keeping me company, putting up with me being a selfish brat – thank you.”
Dawn smiled. “Nobody’s called me that in a long time.”
“Do you not like it? I can stop, if you want.”
“No, it’s okay,” Dawn assured her. They walked in companionable silence the rest of the way.
[hr]
The room was familiar, but different. Looking around, Tara guessed that it looked as it did when it was Buffy’s bedroom. “Hello?” she called into the silence. “Is there someone h-here?”
“There is,” a voice replied from behind her. She turned and took in the sight of the speaker. He was tall – nearly six foot six if she were to guess – and his build was massive. His closely shaven head caught the soft sunlight, and his blue eyes were hard. He sat down on Buffy’s bed and it groaned in protest.
“So – who are you?”
“You can call me Michael.”
“L-like the angel?”
“Like that, yes.”
“Why are we h-here?”
“Because you’ve angered some powerful forces. Set things in motion that you can’t control. And because this may well be the end of days.”
“Oh.” Tara sat down heavily. “I see. And who do you represent, exactly – the Powers?”
“Hardly. The Powers are middle management. This case has caught attention from...well, let’s just call them Upper Management. They don’t normally get involved in your affairs, but you changed the game.”
“In a b-bad way?” Tara asked, confused.
“Not at all – there’s no good or bad in change. The best word, I think, would be...profound. The scales, the balance, everything has shifted.”
“But that was months ago – why are, uh, Upper M-Management taking an interest now?”
“Until now you’ve been safe. The forces aligned against you were crushed and scattered with the destruction of the Senior Partners and the closing of the hellmouths. But now, they’ve begun to regroup. And they will be coming after you, with everything they can muster.”
“And h-how much is that, exactly?”
“Well, they’ll be led by Chaos. Not in the abstract, but literally. He walks the earth now, in the form of a mortal. And there are still enough demons on this plane to be a formidable army.”
“What do they w-want? Just to kill me?”
“Kill you? No. They need what’s in your head, Tara – the spell you used. They can sense that their time is coming to an end, and so they seek to reopen the hellmouths and tip the scales back in their favour. That’s why your children were spared – whatever happens, the Slayer line must continue.”
“That w-was you?” Tara exclaimed.
“Yes – I do apologise for using you as a vessel without your permission, but there wasn’t time to ask.” He rose, and began to walk away. He stopped at the bedroom’s door and turned back. “Know this,” he told her. “If you seek atonement, if you desire redemption, then this is your opportunity. If Chaos can be banished from the Earth, then the forces of light will hold such sway that they will never be dethroned. Every life lost in the struggle, every moment of pain will be made worthwhile. Evil will be all but powerless, now and always.”
“And will we be g-getting any help?” Tara raised an eyebrow.
“You’ve had it,” he smiled – the sight was chilling, rather than comforting. “Management will go on, however this turns out – this is your battle to win.” With that, he walked out and closed the door behind him. As it slammed, Tara jerked awake. In a panic, her eyes scanned the room for Willow – and found her, fast asleep in her bed. She pulled her chair close and took her hand.
She was still holding it when the door opened and Angel, Faith and Buffy entered. Tara greeted them with a smile that felt odd on her face. They looked warily at her.
“So – what’s new, T? When exactly did you get your mojo back?”
“It wasn’t mine,” Tara corrected. “Why don’t you sit down, all three of you – we have a lot to talk about.”
They were still gathering chairs when Buffy’s phone rang.
“Hello? Yes, Dawn – no, Tara’s here. Hold on a sec.” She passed the phone over.
“Hello?” Tara could hear shaky breaths on the other end of the line. “Dawn?”
“No, it’s...it’s me.”
“Anya? Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I just – I really needed to hear your voice, mom. Don’t tell Buffy, but we were, uh, out in a graveyard tonight, and we ran across...umm...well, we found your grave.”
“Oh,” Tara replied, cursing herself for not being able to form a more coherent thought. “I’m okay, sweetheart – I promise you. I’m so sorry for what I put you through, my baby, and seeing that must have been so terrible for you. I’ll tell you what, darling – the minute your mama feels up to it, we’ll fly back home and we’ll spend so much time together that you’re sick of me. How’s that sound?”
“That sounds great, mom – I love you,” Anya’s voice was thick with unshed tears. “I love you so much.”
Tara could feel tears sliding down her cheeks, but she waved Buffy away when she approached to see if everything was okay. “I love you too, Anya – you’re our whole world, you know, mine and your mama’s. We’ll see you soon, okay?”
“Okay – goodbye, mom.”
“Goodbye, sweetheart.” Tara listened for the click of Anya hanging up before hanging up herself. She wiped her tears away with the back of her sleeve. “Okay,” she said shakily, “where were we?”
“T, if you need a sec-“
“No. I need to tell you what’s happening, and I want to remember everything he told me.”
Faith looked at Buffy, who gave her a puzzled shrug. “Who’s ‘he’?”
“It’s a long story.”
[hr]
More to come!
_________________ "Rubi, you're like a turd in a punch bowl." ~ Malcolm McDowell, Wet
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