Seder Crusader
God Only Knows What I'd Be Without You
Tara watched, concealing a smile, as Anya continued to check her appearance on any shiny surface she passed.
“You look really nice,” she reassured softly.
Anya shrugged it off.
“What do I care?”
“Okay,” Tara nodded knowingly, “They’ll be here soon.”
Anya shrugged again.
“Don’t care.”
Despite her protests, as soon as there was a knock on the door, Anya jumped about ten feet.
“I’ll get it,” Tara said in a light, sing-song voice as Anya checked her hair in the toaster yet again.
Tara answered the door and was surprised by the rush of red that ran in.
“Willow,” she said, quickly looking out behind her before closing the door, “You’re early.”
Willow was pacing up and down all in a fluster.
“Tara! Disaster!”
Anya rolled her eyes and went off to the bathroom, uninterested in whatever was happening. Tara quickly approached Willow and took her hands.
“Darling, what’s wrong?”
Willow paused and looked at Tara with wide eyes. She gulped.
“I may have invited my parents for a Passover Seder.”
Tara’s brow furrowed.
“Invited them…where?”
Willow gave a pained, awkward smile. Tara’s eyes widened.
“Here?!” she asked incredulously, “You invited them here? When?”
Willow bit her lower lip.
“Tonight?”
“WHAT!?” Tara exclaimed, her jaw tensing.
“I PANICKED! THEY WANTED ME TO COME HOME!” Willow replied in a louder, distressed tone, before dropping her voice, “And I…I wanted…”
She looked at Tara meekly.
“I wanted to have sex this weekend.”
“Willow,” Tara clicked her tongue, folding her arms on her chest.
“It was a long week!” Willow whined.
Even though Anya was in another room, Tara took Willow’s elbow and brought her to the furthest corner, out of earshot.
“I put that video you asked for on our app,” she said quietly.
“Why do you think I need
it so badly this weekend?!” Willow retorted with her facial muscles bulging.
Tara’s hands covered her face and with perfect timing, another knock went at the door.
Willow’s head flew toward it in horror.
“No! They can’t be here already!”
Tara exhaled and strode across the room.
“They’re not,” she said as she threw open the door, “They are!”
On the other side, Buffy and Xander stood, looking awkwardly at each other at whatever scene they’d just walked into.
Willow blinked heavily.
“Huh?”
“Nice to see you, too,” Xander quipped.
Willow shook her head and came over to hug her friends.
“It’s so good to see you guys.”
From the bathroom, Anya came hurrying out and waved frantically.
“Xander! Hi!”
Xander smiled bashfully and waved back.
“Hi Anya,” Buffy greeted and was ignored, so turned the other way, “Hi Tara.”
“Hi Buffy,” Tara greeted back and they leaned in for a brief but sincere hug.
Willow finally seemed to get her bearings.
“Hi Buff,” she said and glanced briefly at Xander but he and Anya were still making googly eyes so she focused back on her other friend, “What are you doing here?”
“Tara invited us,” Buffy replied with a smile.
Willow frowned.
“For Passover?”
“Huh?” Buffy asked, brow furrowing.
“Is that like the Mescal in Mexico?” Xander finally looked over to them, “Because I’m not such my constitution could take it.”
Anya started laughing uproariously.
“That was a joke, a funny joke!” she announced, beaming at Xander, “You made a funny joke.”
Xander smiled sheepishly.
“Thanks.”
Buffy glanced around the whole room.
“Should we…not have come?”
“No, of course, you should have,” Tara said softly, “I’m glad you’re here. It was supposed to be a surprise for you, Willow.”
“Mission accomplished,” Willow smiled awkwardly, “But I have to tell you guys, you just walked into a crisis.”
“It can’t be any worse than Dawn screeching to take her with me,” Buffy quipped, leaving out ‘or holding my mom’s hair back while she pukes after treatments’.
Tara seemed to know though, patting Buffy’s shoulder, who gave a little, gracious smile.
“Willow invited her parents here for us to host a Passover Seder, apparently. We have — how long?”
Willow glanced at her watch and grimaced.
“Maybe three hours?”
Tara tried to breathe evenly.
“Okay. Are we supposed to cook during that time? Do you even know how to cook the right food?”
Willow frowned.
“We can’t do anything leavened so no wheat, barley, rye, oats or beans, peas, rice, corn…”
“Sounds like paleo,” Buffy interjected, “I tried it once. It…sucked.”
Willow suddenly clicked her fingers.
“We’ll get take out from the Jewish deli in Fairfax. We’ll empty it into dishes, my parents will never know. I’ll go right now.”
“What can we do?” Tara asked as Willow fussed around for the bag she’d dropped upon entering.
Willow popped up with her wallet and looked around.
“Make the table look nice. Spring-like. Use the blue and white tablecloth. And can you make five bowls look pretty on a plate? I’ll explain later,” she said to Tara before smiling eagerly at Buffy, “You, burn some eggs. I entirely trust you to be able to do that.”
While Buffy frowned, Willow spun to Xander and Anya, who were now whispering to each other on the couch.
“And you two…” she paused and shook her head, “Are not even listening to me anyway.”
She turned toward the door and Tara held a set of keys out.
“Take my car.”
“Right,” Willow nodded and grabbed them.
“Don’t speed!” Tara called after her but Willow was already practically spinning.
On the couch, there was a giggle from Anya as Xander leaned in with a goofy smile on his face. Buffy and Tara shared a pained look.
Over two hours later, Willow returned with white paper bags on her arm.
“I have gefilte fish, I have brisket, I have knish and I have matzo! Ooh, can’t forget the horseradish,” she announced as she dropped the bags at the corner of the kitchen, “I also have the worst neck cramp in the world because it took me that long to get through 4 square miles of L.A. traffic.”
She stopped, took a breath, and immediately inhaled deeply.
“How does it smell so good in here?”
Buffy was using two bags of flour as weights while she did lunges while Tara was in an apron in the kitchen stirring a big pot.
“I roasted a chicken and now I’m making a soup,” Tara explained, taking a quick water break, “It has to at least seem like we tried to cook.”
“I’m helping by staying out of the way,” Buffy smiled, “But I burned those eggs up good for you!”
“I’ve been learning a lot about The Bachelor,” Tara added with a fond smile for Buffy.
“Great!” Willow replied, looking unsurely between her girlfriend and best friend, “Where are Xander and Anya?”
A silence came upon the room.
“We sent them on a walk,” Tara said softly.
Buffy shuddered.
“It was uncomfortable for us all.”
Willow suddenly had a memory of being in the parking lot and feeling like a car that looked suspiciously like Xander's old jalopy was rocking back and forth. Assuming it was her vision giving out after her scurrying around to get supplies and/or dehydration from her state of panic, she had continued without looking but now she paled.
“So, um, did you say chicken soup?” she said, and then her head shot up with an idea, “Hey, we can make matzo ball soup! I got the mix and everything!”
“Okay,” Tara replied, taking out a new bowl, “I’ve never made them before.”
“I’ll help,” Willow replied, eager to impress, “It’s super easy.”
Buffy came over to help Willow unload the supplies while Willow showed the box of matzo meal mix to Tara.
Together they started to mix it up per instructions, sharing natural flirty glances and giggles along the way.
Buffy took a step back out of their space.
Between Xander and Anya unable to keep their hands off each other and Willow and Tara unable to keep their eyes off each other, Buffy felt her body parts lacking a partner.
“Should I go get some flowers?” she asked, feeling like some air wrapped around her would be second best to some hunky male right now.
“That would be so helpful,” Willow looked over her shoulder with a big nod, “Tulips if you can find them.”
She bumped Tara’s shoulder and lowered her voice.
“They won’t beat your two lips but they’ll look good on the table.”
They giggled and didn’t hear Buffy leave.
The matzo ball making was a pretty easy endeavor with the mix involved and in a few minutes, they were in the pot of boiling water, cooking. Once Willow washed her hands, she turned around and finally registered the set table.
Tara had utilized the blue and white tablecloth as Willow had requested and on it had placed white plates with the silverware wrapped up in twine. Empty wine bottles with lights inside sat either end of the table and in the middle was the plate Willow had requested Tara make up with the little bowls.
Willow would fill them with the specific items that were significant to the story of Passover soon.
Two big, yellow-y/orange-y candles sat next to the bottles waiting to be lit, and at each place-setting was a mason jar for a glass.
“Wow, this table looks great!” she exclaimed and took out a little brown bag from inside another bag, “I just need to put the Haggadah out.”
Tara frowned at the wording.
“I know Hecate but not so sure about Haggadah…”
“It’s like a ceremony booklet,” Willow explained quickly, “I found a Judaica store a few blocks away, thankfully. And please don’t say other God or Goddess’s names in front of my father.”
Tara nodded quickly to indicate she understood but frowned even deeper when she saw Willow placing the little booklets at each place-setting.
“Willow this says The Stonewall Seder,” she read aloud and flicked through it, her eyes widening, “It’s LGBTQ themed.”
“I didn’t have many options; we're in West Hollywood!” Willow protested, looking at the back of the booklet before setting it back down, “It can’t be that gay.”
As she set the final one in place, she noticed the mason jars each had a little piece of brown paper attached by twine with a name scribbled on it.
Willow touched one and looked up at Tara.
“Did you put name tags around these mason jars?”
“Yes?” Tara asked unsurely, wondering if she’d made a Passover faux-pas.
Willow strode over to Tara, grabbed her cheeks, and pushed her against the nearest wall.
“I’m so horny for you.”
She started kissing Tara ferociously but Tara had to push her off.
“Well, you have to wait because of the mess you’ve dropped us in.”
Willow opened her mouth to protest but then it suddenly dropped further in horror.
“WINE!”
“What?” Tara asked with a frown.
Willow’s hands clutched her head.
“I didn’t get any wine! There has to be wine!”
“You can’t get any wine,” Tara replied in a soothing voice, “Nowhere will serve you. I’m sure your parents will understand.”
Willow’s hands dropped and she looked at Tara pleadingly.
“Just let me touch your boobs once,” she said, her eyes almost bugging out of her head, “For anxiety relief!”
Tara was very close to allowing Willow to cop a feel, such was the alarming look on her girlfriend’s face.
Before she could decide, there was a knock on the door and Willow jumped.
Tara answered the door cautiously and breathed out when she saw who was on the other side. She stepped aside to let her in.
“Buffy!” Willow exhaled, throwing her head back.
Buffy looked confused but Tara tried to calm everything down.
“These are lovely, Buffy, thank you,” she took the tulips from her to find a vase, “Willow, do you need to do your plate…thing?”
“Shit!” Willow exclaimed, turning herself around on the spot, “Where are the burned eggs?!”
Buffy proudly directed Willow to the eggs and began helping her prepare the Seder plate. Each little bowl had food items arranged that had significance to the telling of the story of Passover — The Exodus from Egypt by Israelite slaves and their deliverance from slavery by Yahweh.
Willow’s items were a little bit more thrown-together than the Seder plates she’d grown up with, but technically all there.
Once again there was a knock on the door and again, Willow jumped.
“Buffy hide the flour!” she said, and Buffy ran to grab the vase sitting on the counter, “Now the flowers, the flour!”
She flapped her hand in the direction of the bags of flour still sitting on the floor from earlier.
Buffy bent down with wide eyes.
“Is it against Judaism? Should I bring it down to the dumpster?” she asked Tara, her eyes growing in concern, “Should I burn it?”
“I-I think just put it into the cabinet,” Tara advised gently and with an unsure glance at Willow.
Buffy picked up both bags with ease but as she pushed them into the cabinet, a puff of flour fell out of an opening and covered her hands and sleeves. She stared down at them in alarm.
At the door, Willow adjusted her shirt so it was crease-free and opened the door with a big, albeit forced, smile.
“Hi—” she started, but immediately deflated when it was just Xander and Anya, sharing coy smiles and red faces, “Ugh!”
“Fine, we won’t come back to help!” Anya said indignantly, looking up at Xander, “Why did you make me come back? They’re not even paying us to help!”
Xander just looked sheepish while Tara rubbed her temple as Willow’s head fell against the door.
“Can you guys just start shining some glasses or something?” she requested softly.
“And wash your hands first!” Willow yelled back, trying not to shudder.
Xander and Anya went to the sink but just used it as an opportunity to play ‘handsie’ and splash water at each other.
Whatever animosity had been hanging between them had clearly been well and truly ‘banged’ out.
The door knocked again and Willow threw it open without preamble.
“And who’s this, a lost delivery boy?” she asked with a heavy eye roll before standing up straight with a squeak when she saw who was on the other side, “Mom! Dad!”
“And what kind of a greeting to guests do you think that is?” Sheila asked with her nose turned up.
Ira entered the apartment more jovially.
“Gut yontiff!” he greeted and smiled to see all of the different faces, “Oh, wonderful. A full house. Just as the holiday prescribed.”
He placed his hand on Tara’s arm and shook her hand warmly.
“My dear, thank you for inviting us today.”
“Mmhmm,” Tara nodded quickly and tried to smile.
Ira approached the next closest person, Buffy, who backed away, holding up her white hands.
“Don’t touch me! I’m unclean!”
“We’re also unclean,” Anya informed them helpfully, “But we washed our hands.”
Willow started laughing almost maniacally.
“They’re doing a bit,” she said, her eyes boring into Buffy, Xander, and Anya in that order, “And now they’re going to go
clean up as a symbolic show of respect for the holiday. So, uh, go right ahead guys!”
She kept laughing and hugged her father as cover while the three scurried off to the bathroom.
Tara closed the door and took Sheila’s coat, who also offered a bottle of wine. Tara held it up, hoping it would calm her girlfriend down a bit.
“Oh, Willow, look.”
“Wine!” Willow exclaimed as if she’d just received the greatest gift of her life.
Tara brought the wine over and pressed it into Willow’s hands while whispering in her ear.
“Take a breath, love.”
Willow met Tara’s eyes and copied Tara as she took in a slow breath.
She mouthed ‘thank you’ and adopted a more natural smile to go and hug her parents.
“Thanks for coming,” she said, stepping back as the others returned from the bathroom, “Um, you remember Xander and Buffy and Anya, Xander’s…uh, Tara’s roommate.”
“Chag sameach,” Anya greeted brightly.
Ira smiled, impressed and even Willow’s eyebrows shot up.
“What a respectful young woman.”
“I briefly lived in a Hasidic Jewish community in Monsey when I was younger,” Anya explained with an even nod.
“How fascinating,” Ira replied, closing his arms on his chest in interest, “Are you of the faith?”
“We’ve tried them all out at some point,” Anya said in that same, bright tone, “My favorite was the Christian sect that originated the story of Santa Claus. He didn't traditionally bring presents so much as, you know, disemboweled children, but otherwise…”
Ira’s arms slowly dropped. Willow quickly cleared her throat.
“Why don’t I get everybody drinks?”
Ira, still slightly taken off-guard but remaining stoic, caught Willow by the elbow.
“Willow, I hope you don’t find this presumptuous but I brought my Kittel.”
Referring to his religious robes usually worn on this occasion, Willow just quickly nodded. She was quite happy for him to take the lead tonight.
“Yeah, go ahead Dad.”
“After the candle lighting, of course,” Ira smiled easily.
“Yes!” Willow replied, glancing out of the kitchen window to see how close to sunset it was, “Yes, I’ll get that set up right now. Um, Tara!”
Tara was quick to Willow’s side.
“Yes, dear?” she asked and didn’t see Ira’s mustache twitch in amusement.
“Those, um, candles?” she asked, her smile painfully wide, as her voice became pleading, “You have those candles we talked about, yeah?”
Tara looked terrified for a moment, before going to the table to pick up two single candlesticks in their holders that had been sitting either end.
“…these ones?” she asked hopefully.
Willow nodded, quick and relieved.
“Yep, there they are!” she said too loudly, grabbing them as she leaned in to kiss Tara’s cheek and whisper, “IloveyouIloveyouIloveyou.”
She took Tara’s hand and brought her over to the window to set the candlesticks down.
“Uh, Buffy,” she called over, and then, reluctantly continued, “And um, Anya? Would you sit here with me while I light the candle? And mom, of course.”
The women all came around and Anya looked like she was going to comment but thankfully stopped.
Willow didn’t see Tara staring Anya into submission from behind.
Willow cleared her throat and lit the candles, then waved her hands over the flame and brought them up to cover her eyes.
“Baruch attah a-donai e-loheinu melech ha'olam, asher kiddeshanu bemitzvotav, vetzivvanu lehadlik ner shel yom tov,” she sang with perfect intonation.
She offered a smile to all of the women, even Anya.
“Baruch attah a-donai e-loheinu melech ha'olam, shehecheyanu vekiyyemanu vehiggi'anu lizman hazzeh.”
She turned back to smile at Tara and leaned back into her for support, which was readily given.
“As we bathe in the light of these candles, we remember all of the candles we’ve lit as the chosen people,” Ira spoke in a soft but purposeful tone, “As we share in this light we see the reflection of the creator’s light and use it as our beacon in work and in our lives. Together we give light to the hopes and dreams of all people.”
The faith might not be the same, but the sentiment was shared with them all.
Once night fell Willow, with a couple of looks from Ira, invited everybody to the table. Ira naturally sat at the head of the table, having adorned his robes, and Willow thought this table full of feminists was not the best place for this, but nobody said anything.
Ira seemed amused and pleased that Willow had sourced her own Haggadah and lifted it as he stood to read proudly.
“Tonight we gather to fulfill a new mitzvah by making sacred the celebration of a Jewish LGBT Pride Seder,” he read, then seemed to hear his own words and frowned, clearing his throat, “Well, um, yes. We celebrate not only as Jews but take pride in our faith but in being…”
He paused again, looking at the words in the booklet carefully.
“Gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender or in some other way different.”
Willow wanted to die.
She really should have proofread.
She couldn’t bear to look around to see what kind of look her mother was giving her. Under the table, Tara squeezed her hand.
Ira stopped for a long moment, then he locked eyes with Willow and appeared to stand taller, reading again, strong and proud.
“That includes looking at our Jewish heritage through the lens of our love, and at our heritage as LGBT people through our spiritual lens. It means remembering those who wore pink triangles in the death camps, and the Jews at the Stonewall Inn. And it means honoring the memory of those who fought for our full equality before the law for our relationships, and for our love. It means calling forth the words and wisdom of the ancestors and elders of our community, often ignored or forgotten by the wider world. Tonight we honor our whole heritage, by sharing stories of our predecessors, stories of our own lives, and the stories we have yet to live. We seek to be our whole selves before god and know that no part of who we are is unacceptable.”
Willow’s heart was beating out of her chest and she could just about manage to share a small smile with her father.
Ira closed the booklet in front of him and continued to speak of his own volition.
“On Passover, we celebrate our liberation as Jews of the Jewish people from Egypt and the slavery endured there, together with the abominations of Egypt and their way of life. So today, we celebrate our physical liberation and our spiritual freedom. One cannot be without the other and no real freedom exists without accepting the Torah and its guidance in our daily lives. It is holy life that is true freedom. It is love that is true freedom.”
He continued for a long while in speaking of the importance of faith. Buffy did her best not to fall asleep, Xander and Anya did their best to keep their hand-play under the table and Willow listened as raptly as she ever had; feeling a connection to her faith that she rarely did after listening to her father stand up for her with his words.
Tara had put her arm around Willow and was getting annoyed glances from Sheila, but it was hard to tell whether or not that was just her resting face. Still, she assumed Willow would tell her if she was making some faux pas so she didn’t let Sheila intimidate her into showing less affection.
Finally, Ira finished speaking and everyone was jolted back into the moment by Willow and Sheila standing and lifting their small cups of wine. The others gave confused looks before joining and did well to keep a neutral face as Ira began recounting a long blessing.
When he finished, he leaned to the left and drank from the cup. When both Willow and Sheila did the same, everyone cottoned on and did the same and sat down again.
And then immediately stood back up; some staggered in confusion.
Willow silently brought a basin to the table with another small cup and Ira poured water over each hand three times, then passed the basin to the side for Sheila to do the same. They continued around the table; the simple motion picked up by the non-Jews quickly enough that no one needed to ask what to do.
The next while consisted of a lot of blessings over various foods before Ira began to recount the story of the escape from Egypt.
And that took a long time.
It was a big story.
Willow asked Ira prescribed questions about why this night differed from all others and Ira answered with his own added accounts from the Torah; a retelling of old accounts and a discussion of the four types of children: the wise child, the wicked child, the simple child, and the child who doesn’t know enough to ask a question. He poured a second cup of tine but he didn’t drink; instead, he used his finger to transfer ten drops to his plate.
And then a song began to be sung, waking a few at the table up.
Tara did her mightiest to keep the tune and hum along to encourage everyone else at the table.
Finally, Ira said another blessing and drank the wine.
There were relieved looks on Buffy and Xander’s face but Anya knew it wasn’t over and squeezed Xander’s thigh, who jumped.
The basin came out again there was more silent hand-washing.
“We already did this,” Buffy whispered.
“Bunny, ssh,” Sheila spat across the table and Buffy shifted uncomfortably.
Sheila rolled her eyes.
After the second hand-washing, there were more blessings over increasingly odd kinds of food that most were very glad only Ira sampled. Finally, Buffy watched with horror as Ira dipped one of her burned eggs in saltwater and ate it with a smile.
“Now we can eat,” Willow smiled for everyone.
“Food?” Xander asked with a squeak, “Eat now? Food?”
“Food,” Willow confirmed and Xander snatched up his fork.
Willow and Tara quickly brought the food over to their very hungry and extremely patient guests, who began eating hungrily.
Willow beamed at Tara, who smiled back at her, pleased that not only had the dinner been pulled off, but seemed to have been a real hit.
“What a beautiful tzimmes,” Sheila complimented cordially as she ate some of the root vegetable casserole Willow had bought, “Did you make it, Tara?”
Tara cleared her throat softly.
“Willow took care of it, actually.”
“Really?” Sheila raised an eyebrow.
“Tara made the matzo ball soup,” Willow quickly deflected.
“Well it’s wonderful,” Ira smiled and Tara noticed for the first time that Willow had her father’s smile, “I’m very impressed. We’ll have to have you at every Passover.”
Sheila made some noise at that but Tara just smiled at the compliment.
“Thank you, sir. I’d love to. I found this very enlightening and joyous.”
“And long,” Anya added with a sure nod, “Very, very long.”
Xander groaned but it was lost through all of the food in his mouth.
“Almost as long as—” Anya began to continue, but Buffy took the lead in quickly stepping on her foot, “Ow!”
“Shalom!” Buffy covered and then very quickly ate some brisket to deflect the eyes on her.
“Chag Pesach sameach,” Willow further deflected and while Ira and Sheila looked over them all like they were crazy, Ira offered a placating smile.
“Indeed,” he nodded, “These latkes could be my mother’s! Willow, you must have made them.”
“I did,” Willow replied shyly, “I had Bubbe’s recipe saved on the cloud.”
“Willow’s an excellent cook,” Tara complimented, linking their fingers on the table.
“That’s how hag-gad-ah,” Willow quipped, then trailed off in embarrassment when only blank faces looked back at her, “How I…got…her…”
She looked down and crumpled up her Haggadah in silent protest of her unperceived joke but couldn’t help but smile when she felt a kiss on her cheek a moment later.
She looked over at Tara, who had pulled her hair into a messy but tight bun in some reverence for the occasion and had a moment of just utterly falling in love.
Tara laughed when Xander told an inadvertent joke about dogs attending Synagogues (inadvertent because it wasn’t actually a joke, it was a real question) and Willow truly knew what it meant to swoon.
All Tara had done to help pull this together, not to mention the inviting of friends which she hadn’t even touched on yet with everything else going on — Willow was just so in love with this powerhouse of a woman and she found herself unable to keep it inside.
“Um,” she said as she stood, her body acting before her mind, “Uh…”
Everybody duly paying attention to her now, Willow dropped back into her seat and took both of Tara’s hands.
“Will you move in with me?”
Sheila began to cough and Tara’s eyes widened.
“W-what?”
Willow lightly panted; her heart beating out of her chest.
“I guess it’s more, will you let me move in with you?” she amended with a nervous smile, and swallowed a lump as she took a cursory glance around the table, “I-I should have done this in private.”
Tara was present entirely with Willow, ignoring the stares.
“Willow, I don’t understand.”
Willow shifted in her chair but didn’t drop Tara’s hands. She looked her in the eye.
“I don’t want to be here at the weekends. I want to be here every day. I want it to be our place.”
“Does that mean you’ll pay more money?” Anya interjected brightly.
They both ignored her.
“What about school?” Tara asked, brow furrowed.
“Yes, indeed,” Sheila huffed, “A pertinent question.”
Willow didn’t break Tara’s gaze.
“I can arrange my labs on one day and do virtual classes. I’ve already looked into it.”
Tara’s lips twitched on one side.
“Are you really serious?”
“Every night of your life,” Willow answered, smiling in the same way.
Tara’s grin broke out in full.
“Of course, I want to live with you.”
They threw their arms around each other and there was a small clap from their friends.
“You can’t possibly—” Sheila’s voice started to berate but she was interrupted when an unexpected visitor jumped up on the table.
“Miaow!” Miss Kitty Fantastico greeted everyone and snarfed some gefilte fish.
“Miss Kitty, no,” Tara scolded and quickly plucked her up and set her back down on the floor.
Willow chuckled nervously.
“Oh, yeah…we got a cat.”
Ira cleared his throat and raised his glass, apparently choosing to ignore what just happened.
“L’chaim.”
“Bless you,” Buffy answered.
Ira smiled at her.
“And bless you,” he replied sincerely, “All of you. This was an unexpected and truly wonderful celebration. What fine young adults you’ve all grown into. Chag Pesach kasher vesame’ach.”
Willow took Tara’s hand tightly and squeezed the life out of it; unable to even begin to express her glee. Tara smiled at her; crooked and full of joy.
The night went on as did the Seder. Ira asked Willow to go to the kitchen to ‘find’ some matzoh he’d hidden earlier and then broke it for everyone; performed more blessings; drank more wine and participated in a few ritualistic observances but nobody minded as much with fuller bellies.
When it was over, Ira announced he and Sheila would be heading back to their hotel but pulled Willow and Tara aside as Sheila went to the bathroom.
“Girls, I am very impressed with what you’ve done tonight. A small token of my appreciation.”
Into their hands, he slipped two little pouches with a coaster made to look like matzoh, star of David socks, and some $20 bills folded up as well as a card with a blessing.
“Thank you so much,” Tara said sincerely, understanding this was another ritual of the many performed tonight.
“Thanks!” Willow added and looked to Tara, “Um, when I was little the whole finding the matzoh thing was a big deal. It’s called the afikomen and I’d get a little pouch like this with the matzoh and the goodies.”
“I’m honored,” Tara replied with a quick nod, “Ira, your Seder was beautiful. I truly do look forward to the next one.”
Ira nodded cordially and gave Willow a big hug. Sheila came up to them and Tara got an unrelenting stare to leave. What was most impressive about this stare was that Sheila never actually looked at her.
Still, Tara went to clear plates to the sink, forcing Xander and Anya to break apart on the counter.
Anya huffed out a breath of annoyance, then glanced at her bedroom and back to Xander with a soft vulnerability in her eyes.
“I don’t let just anyone in, you know,” she said, eyes searching his, “To my bedroom.”
“I may be dumb but I’m not stupid,” Xander replied with big eyes, “Just talking with you these past few weeks again has been the best part of my day. I’d rather talk all night with you than do anything with anyone else.”
Anya put her palm flat on Xander’s chest.
“I hope that includes dirty talk.”
Tara cleared her throat and tucked some hair behind her ear.
“If you two want to, um,
retire for the evening, nobody would mind.”
Anya scoffed.
“What, only you can defile the public spaces?”
“I have
never defiled this kitchen,” she said, though had thought about it, “And certainly not with you in front of me.”
“May as well with how loud you are,” Anya retorted.
Xander’s ears perked up.
“L-Loud?” he asked, blinking rapidly, “Like you can hear from out here?”
Anya rolled her eyes.
“It’s boring,” she lamented flatly, then started to grin, “Not like when you do that thing—”
Before Tara could express more horror, Anya suddenly changed tack and softened her voice.
“I’m ready for you to see my bedroom now.”
Xander smiled goofily.
“I can’t wait.”
Anya jumped down and took Xander’s hand and they ran into her room together. Tara exhaled a soft breath and glanced over to Willow, who had her arms folded on her chest. Tara could guess what Sheila’s parting words were.
“Can I help?”
Buffy’s voice broke through Tara’s thoughts and she looked over to the other woman. Seeing Willow hugging her parents goodbye, Tara quickly shook her head.
“You’ve been such a trooper. Thank you so much for the help but you and Willow should go have a catch-up. If you guys pull out the couch I’ll get you sheets.”
“Sweet, thanks,” Buffy smiled and turned back to Willow, who was just closing the door. She smiled as she saw her friend.
“Buffy! I feel like we haven’t even said hello!”
She threw her arms around Buffy.
“Tara says we should pull out the couch,” Buffy said.
“Right!” Willow nodded and brought Buffy over to the pull-out, “Looks like you won’t have to share with Xander.”
“My body won’t, my ears might,” Buffy shuddered.
“I’ll give you earplugs,” Willow replied seriously.
They pulled out the couch and then both sat on either side. Willow smiled softly.
“I’m so pleased you guys came down to see me. I can’t believe it’s the first weekend we’ve done in L.A. Sorry for the…wackiness.”
Buffy smiled back.
“Felt like old times. Having a crisis to solve before our parents found out.”
Willow nodded quickly, then slowly.
“It is different though,” she said, looking up to Buffy, “Sometimes I wish I’d gone to USCD. Kept the gang together.”
“Life moves on,” Buffy shrugged one shoulder, “Why would you want to be stuck in Sunnydale?”
Willow frowned slightly.
“Because you’re my best friend. You and Xander. And I miss those ‘old times’. I miss the three musketeers.”
Xander came out at that moment and Willow smiled.
“Speak of the candy bar.”
“Dehydration break?” Buffy teased.
Xander grinned and perched down near them with a blush on his cheeks.
“I’ve never been happier.”
“I’m glad for you,” Buffy replied, squeezing his arm.
“Me too,” Willow added, then arched an eyebrow, “But if you fuck it up again and I have to deal with a mopey Anya…”
“Is such language
kosher on a high holiday?” Xander waggled his eyebrows.
Willow rolled her eyes.
“Oh shut up.”
“Xander!” Anya’s voice called out.
“Coming,” Xander replied with a wicked grin and dashed into the kitchen to grab a spatula, “Goodnight ladies.”
Before he could dash, Tara started waving her hands.
“No, no, no!” she exclaimed, taking the spatula back, “I need that for eggs.”
There was a pause and Tara acquiesced with a sigh.
“Just take it. I’ll never be able to trust it again.”
Xander actually giggled and took it back; disappearing into the bedroom moments later.
Tara sighed as she crossed the kitchen.
“I guess it’s cereal in the morning.”
She got the sheets and a spare pillow and left it on the end of the pull-out.
“Goodnight, Buffy. I hope to have a less crazy chance to speak to you tomorrow,” she smiled and looked to Willow, “See you in bed, honey.”
“I love you,” Willow returned and brushed Tara’s hand before she left.
Willow insisted on doing up the bed for her guest and once she’d fluffed up the pillow, she laid on the bed alongside Buffy.
“How’s your mom doing?” she asked quietly after they’d been silent for a moment.
Buffy thought about lying but didn’t have the energy.
“It’s really hard,” she admitted, “But she needs to lean on me. And her treatments are almost over. She can go back to work and maybe I could get back to school. This year was a write-off but I hope I haven’t attended my last frat party.”
“I think that would be really great. Getting back into school I mean,” Willow said with a serious nod, “We can talk about your options and stuff if you want. You and me, we’re going on a date tomorrow.”
Buffy arched an eyebrow.
“Does Tara know?”
“She will approve of this brief fling,” Willow replied wryly, “She’ll be at school and then working the evening. I have a morning class I have to do online but then I’m free. I’d love to hang out and then go to Tara’s work and watch her DJ after.”
“What about Xander?” Buffy asked.
“Something tells me he’s going to be tied up,” Willow replied, then shuddered at her own wording, “We’ll have a movie night on Saturday, the three of us. You guys are here for the weekend, right?”
“All weekend,” Buffy confirmed, “Brian has practically moved in, so that’s helpful when I need a break.”
“He’s nice, right?” Willow nodded hopefully.
“He’s nice,” Buffy said, picking some lint off her sweater, “Helping a lot with bills right now so…yeah, good guy.”
“It’s probably still weird,” Willow said understandably, “I know it was weird for Tara. You know, with her mom and Mr. B and stuff. But he’s also a great guy so I know she’s happy about it.”
Buffy nodded.
“That’s pretty much how I feel.”
“You should talk to Tara about it,” Willow suggested.
“We have,” Buffy smiled, “We had a chat earlier in between craziness.”
Willow’s face lip up.
“That’s…so great,” she said, feeling her heart full, “I kept her from you all for so long. I’m so happy you can be friends with her too. And I’m glad that you can run away from the house for a while.”
Buffy smiled and nodded toward the bedroom door.
“Why don’t you go be with her.”
“I could stay here,” Willow offered sincerely, “You know, slumber party it up.”
“I wouldn’t keep you from your honey,” Buffy shook her head and grinned, “Besides I haven’t missed your snoring.”
“Oh, whatever,” Willow flipped her hair dramatically and smiled back at her friend. “You sure you’re okay here?”
“TV to myself, kitchen beside me?” Buffy gestured at both, “I’m perfect.”
“Sorry, that’s my girlfriend,” Willow quipped back and Buffy gave her a playful push, “Alright. I'll stop giving you a hard time.”
She paused and grinned from the corner of her mouth.
“Runaway.”
Buffy’s eyes widened at the unexpected accusation.
“Will!”
Willow continued to smile and let out a little giggle.
“I’m sorry,” she said, then her lips popped again, “Quitter!”
Buffy pushed her chest out.
“Whiner.”
They began to exchange barbs, each more bizarre than the next.
“Bailer.”
“Harpy.”
“Delinquent.”
“Tramp.”
“Bad seed.”
“Witch.”
“Freak.”
They fell over laughing; neither even fully sure at what, but it was them. Buffy pulled Willow in for a hug and let her go again.
“Go get your girl.”
Willow rested her hand on Buffy’s and squeezed it.
“You’re the best. I’ll see you in the morning.”
Buffy lifted her hand in a wave and Willow stopped off in the bathroom to brush her teeth because something told her that as soon as she set eyes on Tara she wouldn’t be taking her gaze off of her for a while.
Teeth freshly cleaned, she went into the bedroom and closed the door softly. Tara was folding laundry into her dresser and hadn’t heard her, so Willow sneaked up to wrap her arms around Tara’s waist from behind.
“Hello, gorgeous light-of-my-life and pull-er-off-er of excellent last-minute Seders.”
“You sure know how to throw my life into disarray,” Tara chuckled lightly, “I prefer the kind where we go off and travel the world for a year. We must have done okay, though. Did you hear that invitation I got for future Passovers?”
“I did,” Willow smiled on Tara’s shoulder, “You’ll have to show up now.”
“I will,” Tara replied definitively, “Though I’m not sure your mother would be too pleased.”
Willow’s tongue clicked and she pushed away from Tara to pace.
“What is her deal?” she said, flopping down onto the bed, “Sometimes I really think she gets that I’m gay and has accepted it but then…”
“I-I think she has,” Tara replied softly.
Willow sat up.
“What do you mean? You heard those disapprove-y noises. And I got a ‘think about your future’ speech when she was leaving.”
Tara closed her dresser and came to sit next to Willow.
“That’s the thing. I don’t think her problem is with you being gay,” she said, taking Willow’s hand, “I think her problem is with me as a person. Not with me as a girl.”
Willow’s brow furrowed deeply.
“What could she possibly think is wrong with you? You’re a perfect angel with zero faults and she should be lucky to be in your presence every second.”
Tara smiled softly and gave Willow a soft peck.
“You’re sweet and while slightly biased, I don’t think it’s a personality thing. I represent something she doesn’t like. I don’t know if it’s my family or my art or something else entirely. But she seemed to be okay with how things were with us until you made it clear how serious we were.”
Willow took that in, slowly. Instead of saying anything, she just leaned in and rested her head on Tara’s chest. Tara stroked Willow’s hair down her back and just held her there. After a minute or two, she lifted her head again and smiled nervously.
“Hey, do you remember the part where you agreed to move in with me?”
“I do,” Tara replied, splaying her fingers out on one of Willow’s cheeks, “Do you want to…recant?”
“What? No!” Willow replied quickly, frowning, “Do you?”
“I don’t,” Tara shook her head, “You just seemed to ask on impulse.”
“Well…I did,” Willow admitted, “But also, I didn’t! Because I had been looking into it. I was just going to wait until classes finish for the summer since I can’t amend my classes until then anyway. But I just…”
She stopped and swallowed deeply.
“I was just so caught up in…the
Taraness. Not just of you but the stamp you put on the evening and the décor and the food! My dad was right, that’s seriously the best matzoh ball soup we’ve had since Bubbe died. I just wanted to know that could be every day.”
“Please don’t make me do a Seder every day,” Tara laughed.
Willow laughed too.
“No Seders. Just meals. And homework and housework and all the boring stuff. And even the figure-y out stuff like bills. We grew so much traveling by working all of those kinks out and I want to keep growing together.”
Tara let her palm rest under Willow’s chin and tilted it up to kiss her.
“I want all of that too.”
Willow wrapped her arms around Tara and they fell back onto the bed together. They lay on their sides, legs tangled together with their heads on the same pillow.
“I dare say, Ms. Rosenberg, that we are about to live in sin,” Tara smiled crookedly.
“And sin daily, I say,” Willow replied, “Twice a day if we’re up for it. May as well go for broke.”
“My overachiever,” Tara said, tapping Willow’s nose.
Willow tried to bite Tara’s fingertip and Tara teased her by twirling it about Willow’s face.
Finally, Willow caught Tara’s wrist and mock-chomped at her hand before rolling on top of her and doing the same to her face.
Tara giggled and ‘fought’ it but when their lips connected by accident it wasn’t even a split second before they’d pulled each other into a kiss.
“Your lips are like honey,” Willow suckled Tara’s bottom lip into her mouth, “Just like somewhere else.”
She reached down under Tara’s pants and caressed the course hair there and further below into warm, slick arousal.
“God, one kiss can get you this wet?” she whispered through a moan.
“If it’s you kissing me,” Tara replied with a soft pant, twisting her hips into Willow’s hand.
“Oh, I’ll kiss you,” Willow breathed onto Tara’s lips and popped her hand out from beneath Tara’s pants to tug them past her hips.
Tara didn’t object to a quick disrobing and spread her legs for Willow as soon as she was free to do so. Her neck arched back into the pillows when Willow’s tongue landed between her legs. A shiver started at the base of her spine and made her hips buck into Willow’s mouth.
She really didn’t care what she was grinding into, as long as it was attached to Willow.
But it was hard to deny how skilled Willow was with that hot, wet mouth on her hot, wet flesh. She moaned to express her enjoyment and had to hold herself back from just rutting against Willow’s face.
“That feels so good. Oh, that feels so good!”
Willow felt a little throb between her legs as Tara called down to her and wasn’t sure how long she could last with the scratchy feeling of her clothes against her hot skin. Her plan all week had been to come up to L.A. and get down and dirty with Tara before they even had dinner if Tara was receptive (and their text exchanges all week indicated she was) but the emergency Seder had put paid to those plans.
But now the dam had been reopened and she wasn’t even entirely sure she needed Tara to touch her; she was so turned on she could probably get there from dirty talk alone.
And praise, to Willow, was dirty talk.
“You’re so good at this. You’re so good at eating my—” she cut herself off with a loud moan and ended up tugging on Willow’s hair a bit.
Truly unable to take it anymore, Willow threw herself onto the bed alongside Tara and started desperately trying to pop the buttons on her pants.
It took Tara a moment to react to cool air where warm breath had been but only a second after that to see the state Willow had worked herself up to. She quickly rolled onto her side and took over the job of helping Willow out of her pants.
She curved two fingers along Willow’s outer lips and gave her just enough pressure to ease that desperate thumping.
Willow let out a soft sigh of relief and tore her own shirt from her body. Only her bra remained but it tortured her taut nipples and she had to twist out of it, exposing the engorged nubs to the air. Tara quickly ducked her head and took one in her mouth.
Willow’s tongue hung out of her mouth and she tried to move her hips against Tara’s stationary fingers because she was sure it would be all she needed.
Tara released the nipple and did the same on the other side, causing a hiss from Willow.
Tara kissed Willow’s collarbone up to her throat and fell off at her chin. She sat back, straddling Willow, and reached up to let her hair fall free.
“Oh,” Willow groaned at the mere sight, “Oh, mmm…”
Willow’s legs squeezed together but Tara parted them gently with her hands.
“I’ll take care of you first, okay?”
Willow wanted to scream ‘yes, yes, yes’ but her lips were still wet with Tara’s arousal and she could feel the pulsation coming from Tara’s core almost as much as her own.
She licked her lips.
“You wanna…” she glanced down and up again, “Together?”
A quiver came from inside Tara, letting arousal spill from her and out onto her thighs.
“Yes, I would like that very much.”
Willow nodded eagerly for them to start and Tara began to turn herself on top of Willow.
They
had done this before but it was never the most graceful position to adopt.
This time, they were both too horny to even begin to be embarrassed.
Willow pulled Tara down to her mouth before Tara had even settled her knees properly and Tara allowed herself to unabashedly rub herself on Willow’s face for a moment before she began to return the favor.
This position afforded them some muffling of their moans and so neither worried too much about whatever sounds left their tongues to be lost inside each other.
Willow bucked into Tara so hard that her butt was in a position of permanent clench but she didn’t care. Her tongue just rolled around Tara and swallowed her arousal while feeling Tara doing the same with her. It felt like a closed loop of utter pleasure and didn’t take long for that knot in Willow’s stomach to explode out into all of her extremities.
Tara felt Willow shake beneath her and it sent a shiver of her own down her spine. She licked at Willow gently but she was utterly engorged and looked sensitive. Testing, Tara pressed the same two fingers as before against Willow’s clit.
Willow’s leg jerked but she didn’t make any sounds of pain so Tara did it a little bit harder and in literal seconds, loud cries were vibrating between their bodies.
Willow’s body utterly collapsed under her second orgasm, right after a moment of such taut tension that Tara technically got headbutted between her legs.
Tara turned around and sat up, smiling in amusement and arousal at the spent, sated look on Willow’s shiny face.
After a moment, Willow’s eyes flicked open and she seemed surprised to see Tara sitting there.
She frowned, her tongue poking out to lick her lips.
“Did you?”
Tara shook her head softly.
“No.”
“Do you not want to this time?” Willow asked, biting the corner of her lip.
Tara smiled shyly.
“I thought this might be easier?”
It took Willow a moment, but then she caught on.
“Oh! Yeah, definitely! Yeah!”
Tara eagerly shuffled up the last few inches and positioned her knees above Willow’s shoulders. Willow quickly continued from what she’d been doing before and flattened her tongue to press into Tara’s opening.
Tara’s head flew back while her hands splayed out on the wall to give her something to hold onto.
“Mmm…just like that.”
Immediately Willow’s hands took handfuls of Tara’s ass. She rubbed over one cheek and then brought her hand down with a resounding smack. Tara began bouncing as those little sparks started to hit below her stomach.
“I’m so close.”
One, two, and then three smacks and a well-timed suck of Tara’s clit sent her right over the edge and somehow managed to do so with just a strangled moan that wouldn’t give them away.
She flopped back down on the bed with both hands thrown over her head and let her body do a slow, luxurious stretch.
She let out another little moan and turned her head to Willow, who was grinning. Tara reached a lazy hand over to her girlfriend and tickled her cheek.
“What are you thinking?”
Willow looked over innocently.
“That maybe I should buy us a spatula of our own…”
Tara arched an eyebrow.
“For cooking…?”
Willow grinned cockily.
“You’re right. Better make it two.”
In the living room, feeling like she was caught between two dens of iniquity, Buffy slipped her jacket back on and went to find some immorality of her own.
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Not so tender but so Anya - and I'm sure she didn't intend to tease Tara but meant it as a real compliment.
Awww on Tara's side, 
I'm wondering where she hid before - she really is a sneaky cat.