Time and Time Again.Author: Citanul
Feedback: Be kind, rewind? Seriously though all feedback is welcome.
Spoilers: Just about all of them. Go watch the show. And Angel too. Also Agents of Shield a little bit. You know what, if a name you don’t recognize pops up most of the time you can find dozens of pages of character bio if you type that name and the word comics into Wikipedia. It’s almost scary how much page space comic book fans have taken up on that site.
Rating: NC-17 = Smutty smut smut smut. Seriously though they make love quite often.
Pairings: W/T, B/F, G/J, D/J, F/G, A/?, X/A. Also D/C (Though not till they’re older and even then maybe not so much with the graphic detail.)
Disclaimer: You all know I don’t own the rights to characters you’ve seen on TV.
Summary: A story of reincarnation and interdimensional travel made possible through the power of love. What misfortunes will our two favorite love birds be able to prevent with the aid of experience from countless past lives?
Author’s Note: And we've made it to Lois and Clark's wedding day. I know I might be giving too much screen time to an ancillary straight couple but it will pay off soonish. Also I may have gone and added a few extra characters to an already sprawling cast. Honestly, don't worry if you don't recognize most of them. Most of them are like the Dwarves in The Hobbit. There's a dozen but only three have names you need to remember.
If you really want more in depth knowledge of the supporting cast I actually recommend watching both seasons of Young Justice on Netflix and the first season of the new Supergirl show. But it's not necessary. The extra players are really set dressing for the main couple and their love story.
Also I had to break the meet and greet scenes before the ceremony and the reception scenes into two entries. I'll try and post the follow up as soon as possible. Until then, enjoy.
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Primer: Sirens
Willow = Dr. Harleen Quinzel = Harley Quinn = the blonde/blue eyes
Tara = Dr. Pamela Isley = Poison Ivy = the redhead/green eyes
Xander = Bruce Wayne = Batman
Anya = Selina Kyle = Catwoman
Buffy = Death of the Endless = From Neil Gaiman’s Sandman series and a few of her own trade paperback story arcs.
Dawn = Kyle Rayner = Green Lantern
Rupert Giles = Shade
Joyce = Joyce Rayner
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Sirens: Wedding Day Hijinks: The Preshow “So are we doing this thing or what?”
“Yeah Tim.” Dick said as he went over the security feeds for the wedding and reception halls one last time. “We’re good to go. The guests are arriving and both the Titans and the Birds of Prey are in position.”
“Great work boys.” Bruce said as he walked up behind two of the orphans he had taken in. “Any signs of trouble so far?”
“No, but between the constant scanning from Cyborg, Raven, Red Tornado’s human looking drone, Kyle and the other five lanterns here, Kyle’s psychic girlfriend, J’onn’s psychic niece, and Jamie and his Blue Beetle tech we have the place covered.” Dick rattled off the excessive front line of the day’s security detail. He had no doubt that the lineup would be able to spot any trouble coming from several miles away. “We’ll be ready no matter what happens.”
“Good.” Bruce said as he let out a relieved sigh. “Good, Lois and Clark deserve for this day to go off without a hitch.”
“Don’t you mean with just the one hitch?” Tim asked, a sly grin on his young face.
“Very funny smartass.” Dick muttered as the butler who had raised them all walked into the room.
“Ah, Master Bruce, Masters Dick and Tim, I have just returned with Ms. Kyle, Ms. Isley and Ms. Quinn.” Alfred said as he strode up to the billionaire and the boys clustered around the security monitors. “They were quite amused to find out the location of the Metropolis waypoint.”
“I figured they’d get a kick out of where Star Labs stashed Clark’s personal teleport pad.” Bruce chuckled as he looked up to see his girlfriend on the security monitors. The blonde cat burglar was accompanied by the two infamous women who had made this day possible. Clark had been all too thankful for the motivational nightmare inflicted by the alien plant creature Harley had summoned. Bruce pondered whether the wedding had been a part of their plans all along or simply a happy coincidence. He could only hope that no such manipulations happened with his own relationship.
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“I can’t believe the Metropolis Zeta tube is in the back of a dive bar owned by a retired prize fighter.” Harley said as she, Ivy and Selina walked through the front door of the large reception hall. The venue attached to one of Metropolis’ most extravagant hotels would soon host a wedding with the most peculiar guest lists in history.
“Yeah, Bibbo is always going on about how much he likes having the League eat at the Ace o’ Clubs.” The cat burglar said as she led her friends through the main entrance to the luxury hotel into one of the halls running off the back of the lobby. They walked past a row of open ball rooms on their way to the main wedding venue. “He loves telling random people he’s Superman’s biggest fan and then showing them the picture on the wall of him bro hugging the big guy when they don’t believe him. The fact that it’s signed in Kryptonian gibberish always flies over people’s heads though.”
“So I take it the League eats there after missions.” Ivy said as she clasped Harley’s hand.
“Once a month at least.” Selina replied. “Soops himself eats there weekly. Bibbo gets a kick out of how none of the other regulars notice him order more or less the same meals in and out of costume.”
“Those glasses are probably the best mask in the business.” Harley admitted as they reached a changing room.
Selina opened the door and both women following her let out a surprised gasp. The dresses on the rack along the far wall were stunning. Neither woman had ever expected to see such tasteful gowns for such an occasion.
“Those are our Bridesmaids’ dresses?” Harley all but shouted in surprise.
“They’re beautiful.” Ivy whispered.
“And we’ve got you to thank for that.” Selina said as she led the psychiatrist and botanist into the changing room. “Lois was adamant about not having the dress colors clash with a certain eye catching redhead.”
“Oh.” Ivy said, cringing slightly at the admission. “I didn’t think.”
“Hey, don’t feel self-conscious about it Baby.” Harley whispered into a green ear hidden behind long red locks. “It just means she cares. Besides, you didn’t really want to wear some ugly pastel mess for the rest of the day did you?”
“I like them.” Selina said as she picked out the dress with her name printed on a tag clipped to the hanger. “You can never have enough strapless black ball gowns. Plus this little red sash at the waist is cute.”
“I bet the other girls are glad we’re in the bridal party.” Harley added as she grabbed both her dress and Ivy’s. “I once saw a wedding magazine with eighty pages of frumpy bridesmaids’ dresses, each one more of a frilly eye sore than the last. We’re lucky the reporter chose something that goes well with your gorgeous green curves Baby.”
“Alright, I get it.” Ivy said as Harley led her into the changing stall next to the one Selina had disappeared behind. “I won’t get all mopey over my looks on the one day when they actually help.”
“You are so unbelievably beautiful Baby.” Harley assured her Love. “Anyone who can’t see that is a moron.”
“I Love you Sweetie.” Ivy whispered back as Harley helped divest her Love of her red button down shirt and tight fitting shorts. Ivy joined in the effort by stripping the jean shorts and skin tight jersey tee shirt off her Love’s lithe frame. As they stood staring at each other in an awed daze a loud coughing came from the other side of the thin wall.
“Ahem! Don’t get too distracted in there with all that lesbianism and witchcraft you two!” Selina called out sarcastically. “We have to check in with bridezilla after changing. Plus they wanted Harl to check in on the groom and his boy band before the ceremony.”
“That’s not at all ominous.” Harley muttered with equal sarcasm and a deliberate eye roll.
“Come on Sweetie.” Ivy said as she stepped into her dress and pulled it up her long legs and curvy thighs. The emerald woman let out a surprised gasp and sucked in a short sigh as her Love’s nimble fingers trailed along her torso and helped secure the dress in place so that it best showed off Ivy’s ample assets. “Ha-Harley.” She let out in a whimper full of lust and frustration. “Of c-course you know this means war.”
“Promises, promises.” Harley said with a lurid smirk as she stepped into the puddle that was her own dress. Before the slender blonde could even think to lift the gown green hands delicately took over the task. Harley all but shrieked as her Love’s tongue trailed upwards well in advance of the bust line of her dress. The former psychiatrist couldn’t help but shudder as the teasing went well beyond anything she had hoped for that morning. “No fair.” She whimpered piteously as green lips trailed from her thighs all the way up to the most sensitive spots her neck had to offer.
“You’re right.” Ivy whispered as she trailed kisses up to Harley’s jaw and over to her lips. “This isn’t fair.” She said while zipping up the back of her Love’s dress. “But when has that ever stopped either of us?”
“You are so lucky you’re gorgeous and sexy and fuckable and kind and loving and hot and mouthwatering and fuckable and smart and witty and perfect in every way imaginable.” Harley warned her Love with an enthusiastic babble as Ivy took a step back.
“You said fuckable twice.” Selina called out form the other side of the curtain shrouding their changing stall.
“It bears repeating!” Harley shouted back. Ivy could only let the wide smirk put on her face by Harley’s words run its course. She couldn’t help but swoon a little as the enthusiastic fawning of her everything took on a decidedly ribald tone.
Ivy sighed as she took her Love’s hands in her own. “As much as I want to make you back those claims up we should really get out there.”
“Oh, right, yeah of course Baby.” Harley rattled off as she resigned herself to the busy schedule ahead. “Why are we doing this again?”
“Because two people who are very much in Love want to share their happiness with all the people who made it possible, and we kind of played a big part in helping the groom get over his cold feet.” Ivy replied as she took a moment to straighten Harley’s long blonde pigtails. “Also being on friendly terms with the guest list of this little hootenanny is of the good. We don’t need any more of them looking over our shoulders.”
“Curse the importance of our various and sundry nefarious schemes!” Harley shouted in overly campy mock indignation.
“You know the groom can probably hear you two, right?” Selina reminded them.
“Yeah we know.” Harley admitted before a playful smirk crossed her lips. She went on to talk in a slightly raised voice while looking towards the changing room ceiling. “Congrats on your big day Clark, and don’t worry about tonight. Just remember that the clitoris is the tiny nub hiding at the top of the vage and once you get it to come out to play just keep sucking on it. Then take two of your fingers and curl them in a come hither motion on the inside of Lois’ cooch. Most people use their pointer and middle finger but I’m a fan of the middle and ring fingers. The G-spot is inside along the top, about two knuckles deep, and feels like a round, bumpy, kinda spongy patch. Just keep running two fingers over the G-spot while sucking her clit as far down your throat as it will go and you’ll drive her crazy.”
“Oh my god!” Selina shouted as she and Ivy began to cackle at the groom’s expense.
“And for the Goddess’ sake swallow when your wife comes in your mouth!” Harley added in a more indignant tone. “No one likes a spitter!”
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“You okay son?” Jonathan Kent asked as he noticed a stunned and vacant look on his boy’s face.
“What’s the matter Clark?” Bruce asked as he and several of the other groomsmen gathered around the reporter. “Did someone off the guest list get past Barbara and the boys?”
“Oh god.” Clark Kent whispered before schooling his emotions and filing the helpful advice away for later. “I mean, nothing, I’m fine.”
“You look like you’ve seen a ghost Kent.” Perry White said as he looked the groom in the eye once more. The older chief editor of the Daily Planet had the same small smirk on his face that had been there all day. He more than suspected that his reporter had overheard something particularly interesting. Or possible mortifying if the expression on the man’s face was anything to go by.
“No, everything is good.” Clark assured the now worried men standing around the groom suite. “I just got some really great advice is all.”
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“I can’t believe you actually told that boy scout how to plow his wife later tonight.” Selina said with a laugh as she led Harley and Ivy down the hallway. They stopped at a door just a few yards away form the changing room. With yet another chuckle the cat burglar threw the door open and waltzed inside. “The love birds have arrived ladies.” She called out to the cluster of women in matching dresses around the room.
“Hi.” Harley said with an easy wave and a smile as she clutched Ivy’s green hand. “Long time no see…”
“Finally!” Lois called out from across the room as the two women at her side shot her withering glares while applying her makeup.
“You made it!” An overjoyed voice sounded off as the couple was engulfed in a devastating hug. “I still owe you girls drinks for freeing my dad.”
“We missed you too Zatanna.” Ivy assured the raven haired magician. “We were actually looking forward to meeting him for the first time.”
“He’s here!” The black haired magician said with abundant cheer in her voice. “He’s one of the groomsmen. He wants to thank you both himself.”
“As would I.” Another familiar voice said from behind Zatanna. Harley and Ivy looked up in surprise to see Wonder Woman smiling back at them while wearing one of the same bridesmaid dresses. “I have yet to properly thank you both for bringing Amy into my life.”
“Really?” Harley asked in clear astonishment. “Amy?”
“That’s wonderful Diana.” Ivy stepped in quickly before her Love’s questions could set off the Amazon’s mood.
“Amy Madison?” Harley asked again as Diana only laughed in return. “The witch that we ripped Circe out of?”
“Trust me Harley.” Diana said as she regained her compose. “None were more surprised than I, but after taking her to my homeland, helping her train her body and refocus her mind, Amy has more than won over my affections.”
“We’re so happy for you both.” Ivy said as Harley shook the confused look off her face. “It’s good to see all of you again.”
“Especially after the way things went sideways last time.” Harley added with a chuckle that was hastily returned by one blonde sitting off to the side.
“And boy did they go sideways.” Dinah Lance said as she stood to greet Harley and Ivy with a forced smile. “Ollie and I never even saw it coming.”
“You weren’t the one picking leaves and twigs out of your hair for what seemed like days.” Selina grumbled as she recalled the one sided struggle she and the rest of the League suffered while under the control of the Legion of Doom.
“Sorry Selina.” Ivy replied with just enough concern to sound sincere. “The plants seemed like the best chance I had to end things peacefully.”
“I’m over it.” Selina said as she strolled across the room and took a vacant seat beside Lois and the two unknown women.
“I should do a sweep, just in case.” Dinah said as she gave Harley and Ivy another smile. Her second attempt seemed much more sincere.
“I’ll join you. Can’t have too many Lanterns on patrol.” Carol Ferris said a she quickly moved to join the other woman.
“Oh please, we’re safe as houses. There are six lanterns from two different color guards here.” Lois said with an amused laugh. “Plus all the kids and sidekicks are sweeping the building nonstop.”
Carol let a smile play across her lips at the bride’s faith in the heroes throughout the building. “Still.” She told the bride, knowing full well that as the leader of the Lantern Corps powered by Love she bore a greater duty than most to ensure that the ceremony went smoothly. On her way out the leader of the Star Sapphire Corps gave both of her fellow Lanterns a nod and a smile. “It was good seeing you both again.”
“Likewise Carol.” Ivy said as Harley snapped to attention and saluted the retreating brunette.
“What the hell was all that about?” Asked the slightly older blonde at Lois’ side. “She was completely normal until you two came in.”
“Oh don’t blame Carol.” Harley said with a smirk that could terrify most witnesses. “She’s just worried we’ll stage a coup and steal her job.”
“She’s kinda supposed to be our boss.” Ivy added at the wide eyed looks of astonishment on both women standing beside Lois. “She’s in charge of our Corps but we don’t really bother reporting in.” A slight pause in the botanist’s explanation drove the point home. “Ever.”
“Plus we know all her best tricks and a few that she’ll probably never figure out.” Harley added with a smug grin as she walked closer to the bride and the two unknown women. “Hell, I bet she’s still trying to figure out all the neat stuff the Love Star can do.”
“That giant pink Death Star parody in the night sky was you two?” The shorter brunette at Lois’ side was all but overcome with shock as she just stared at the two women who had waltzed into the Bridal Suite like they owned the place.
“One of my network affiliates covered the battle in Belém.” The taller blonde said. “You two ladies caused quite the stir that day.”
“Thank you stranger.” Harley said with a flourish and an exaggerated bow. “So Lois, were you going to introduce us to your charming and flabbergasted friends?”
“With pleasure Harley.” Lois said as the two women paused in their prep work. “I needed some help rounding out my side of the wedding party. So after getting shot down by old college friends I was completely surprised and relieved when Cat Grant and my little sister Lucy stepped up.”
“Like I’d miss your wedding.” Lucy Lane said as she straightened out her big sister’s dress. “We may not have been on the best of terms after college but you’re still my sister LoLo.”
“I love you too Luce.” Lois replied with a warm smile.
Cat simply rolled her eyes. “How touching Lanes.” The gossip columnist turned dour CEO said. “Seriously though. If you want this finished in time stop fidgeting.”
“I can’t believe I’m getting married in a few hours.” Lois said as awe snuck into her voice.
“I can.” Harley said as Ivy took a seat by Selina. The former psychiatrist quickly plopped down in her Love’s lap.
Ivy smiled as she stroked Harley’s back. “You both deserve all the happiness in the world Lois.”
“Gives a whole new meaning to the term star-crossed.” Harley added with a laugh that was joined by Cat Grant’s snide snickering. Before anyone could ask just what the media mogul found so amusing the door opened to reveal two new redheads.
One of the new redheads was in her mid twenties, with glasses, carrying a small tablet device. She wore a modest black dress that was distinct from the ones sported by the women in the wedding party, yet conservative enough to not steal attention from the elegant white gown the Bride wore. The other woman was taller, dressed in a long flowing light blue gown with a small gold tiara atop her head and carried herself with an odd combination of aloof dignity and gravitas that set her apart from the other women. Her swollen belly also added something to her entrance.
“Queenie!” Harley shouted in joy as she leapt up to greet the pregnant redhead. “You don’t call you don’t write. Plus you’re about ready to pop. Your hubby get the nursery ready yet?”
“Dear Harley.” The regal woman said with a light laugh and a kiss to each of Harley’s cheeks. “It has been too long. My boorish husband hardly ever brings dinner guests to the palace anymore. Even with the added security during my pregnancy I am lacking in good surface world gossip.”
“That might be my fault Queen Mera.” Ivy said as she stood to clasp hands with the Queen of Atlantis. “I can get a little crabby when I go without sunlight for too long.”
“More’s the pity.” Mera said as she kissed two emerald cheeks just as easily as she had pale ones an instant ago. “Still, you two always have a standing invitation to tour the royal palace. After the gift you bestowed to my nation our people have entered into a new renaissance, and renewed contact with the surface world is nice too.” With a sly grin the Queen turned to face the bride sitting across the room. “Contact which has allowed me to join in wishing two dear friends all the happiness in the world.”
“I’m honored that you came your highness.” Lois said as she tried to stand and greet the Queen properly.
Mera simply put out her hands and halted the reporter’s movements. “It is my pleasure Lois.” She told the bride with a smile and a reassuring hand on Lois’ bare shoulder. “I am honored to be invited to bear witness to your betrothal. And you will call me Mera. Women like us are too few these days. Rare are those who could hope to tame such bold and headstrong mates.”
“I’ll drink to that.” Selina said as she raised a tall thin champagne glass from one of the side tables near her chair.
“Are you sure you’ve completely tamed Bruce?” Zatanna teased the cat burglar only to turn her head as Ivy and Harley burst into laughter.
“Oh she’s got him wrapped around her finger alright!” Harley told them all. “Always has, but old Brucie isn’t nearly as whipped as Clark. Kudos for that Lois.”
“Thanks Harl.” Lois replied as Cat switched out makeup brushes.
“What about just now when Harley called you Queenie, your highness?” Lucy asked. For a moment she wondered how the Atlanteans viewed the relationship shared by the two odd Star Sapphires.
“She has tamed the great Poison Ivy has she not?” Mera asked in turn with a sly smirk.
“Oh yeah.” Ivy agreed as her hands found their way to wrap around Harley’s waist. “And then some.” She then turned to the younger redhead who had entered along with Mera. “And how are you doing Ms. Gordon?”
“Can’t complain Ivy.” The young woman said as she walked over to take a seat beside Zatanna and Diana. “Though I’m sure you and your Girl Friday there have something in the works that will no doubt supply me with a massive headache before turning out just fine in the end.”
“Maybe later Babs.” Harley admitted with another grin. “But for right now we just have to get Little Miss Thang here down the isle and off to the honeymoon. World domination can wait a day or two. Am I right Cat?”
“Damn straight!” Cat grant shot back with a laugh.
“So you’ve met Barbara before?” Lucy asked Harley and Ivy. The chuckling coming from the blonde was enough to raise her concerns until Ivy volunteered the obvious answer.
“I’ve had my share of run ins with her father over the years.” Ivy said. “How is the Commissioner by the way?”
“Daddy is doing just fine Ivy.” Barbara Gordon admitted. “He’s here as my plus one by the way and mentioned wanting to see the two of you.”
“Got any outstanding parking tickets Baby?” Harley wondered out loud.
“Maybe a few arrest warrants.” Ivy admitted with a sheepish smile.
“Pretty sure he wanted to thank you girls for making his job easier.” Barbara went on as she found a champagne glass of her own.
“How did two reformed criminals make Gotham City’s police commissioner’s job easier?” Lucy asked as Zatanna and Diana shared a look.
“Taking out the Joker for one.” Barbara said. “With him gone the city is on the mend and he can focus on rounding up lesser crazies like the Queen of Hearts.”
“Ooh, I don’t think we’ve heard of her.” Harley asked the cop’s daughter with renewed interest. “Is she new on the scene?”
“Not really anymore.” Barbara replied while barely suppressing a smirk. “The Queen popped up about a month of so after you two moved out of the city. Wasn’t really that active until Batman took out a few of the crime families and you took out the Joker.” She paused for a moment to consider the odd villain. “But it’s nothing the Birds of Prey or the Gotham arm of the Titans can’t handle.”
Cat cut in with a brief chuckle. “Speaking of child soldiers and how much they can handle, I was surprised to find so many kids around Carter’s age on the guest list.”
“Well you know how orphans are with strays.” Lois told her maid of honor. “Clark and his buddies practically draw the poor kids in like magnets. I know all the ones adopted by Selina’s boy toy and I wanted at least a few more loving families in the crowd today.”
“I don’t know if Bruce Wayne counts as a boy toy.” Lucy said as she went to work on her sister’s hair.
“Oh he so does.” Barbara said with such certainty that Cat, Harley, Ivy, Lois and Diana couldn’t help but laugh. Selina only smiled smugly as the odd praise of her relationship status lifted the spirits of everyone in the room.
Lucy looked around the room and realized just how many members of the bridal party ranged from high profile to downright infamous. “So Sis, what was the excuse you had for this incredibly odd guest list again?”
“Well Lucy, I just so happen to be a world renowned reporter who is marrying another reporter that is only slightly less renowned for his reporting.” Lois had an almost smug grin on her face as she told the younger brunette. “And we just so happen to have interviewed a lot of high profile individuals. If anyone asks why we invited them to stand by us at the altar well, we’re going with the story that we both like the drama.”
“You’re a terrible liar Lane.” Cat said as she took a break from applying Lois’ makeup and joined Lucy in the effort to get the Bride’s hair just right. “So is your farm boy now that I think about it.”
“Speaking of your betrothed I recall a few of his groomsmen wished to speak with Harley.” Mera said as she stood once more. “It is also high time I collect my King to make the rounds among the other guests. I shall escort you my dear.”
“Duty calls.” Harley said as she climbed out of Ivy’s lap. Before the green skinned woman could protest her Love spun around and captured her lips in a delightfully possessive kiss. “I’ll see you before the ceremony Baby.”
Ivy let out a slow whimper as she watched her Love saunter out of the Bridal Suite on the arm of the literal Queen of the Mermaids. A moment passed before she recalled just how many other women were still in the room with her.
“Wow.” Lucy Lane said with a surprised whistle. “I didn’t actually believe it until just now.”
“Be nice Luce.” Lois warned her sister as Ivy schooled her emotions and leaned back in her chair.
“No, I’m just saying I had no idea.” Lucy went on. “The media coverage from two years ago when they first ran off together never really showed that the relationship was so…”
“Real?” Cat asked as she fixed the younger brunette with a glare.
“Intimate?” Diana asked as she leaned back and continued to watch with pride as the women of man’s world bantered back and forth about things other than men for a rare moment.
“Loving!” Lucy snapped back with just a hint of challenge in her voice. “I was going to say loving.”
“Well Harley is so easy to Love.” Ivy whispered almost to herself. Her voice had a shy quality to it that stole the fire from the chatter going back and forth just above Lois’ hair. “Incredibly easy to Love.”
“You guys make a great couple.” Zatanna assured Ivy just as it seemed the botanist would lose herself in thoughts of her Love.
“I know.” Ivy said at last before looking up to the bride and other bridesmaids with a smile. None of them truly understood the depths of her commitment to the slender blonde. Her utter devotion. Even so, it was still nice that the odd assortment of old friends and new acquaintances was more than supportive of the relationship that defined Ivy’s ever evolving cycle of lives.
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“So on the way here we noticed the fleet sitting in the Metropolis Bay.” Harley said as she walked beside the pregnant queen. “They must have wanted to pull out all the good toys for your protection detail. I’m a little surprised you managed to come to the surface at all with your due date being so close.”
“I was as well.” Mera admitted as she let one hand rest on her swollen belly. “At first the Admirals wouldn’t hear of it. But after Orin told them of the bride and groom’s guest list it was easy enough to convince them of the safety measures in place. That and our own forces lending aid to the security here.”
“How are Tula and the boys by the way?” Harley asked Mera as they turned a corner and walked down one slightly narrow hallway.
“Tula is magnificent for her age.” The Queen said with more than a little pride in her voice. “She is one of the most gifted students I have ever trained in the mystical arts. Garth and Kaldur’ahm are progressing as well, though they are still a couple of brash young men so one can’t expect miracles. Though all three are gifted in their own unique ways. My husband only had to tell the Admirals that the trio would be joining the Batman’s children in guarding this wedding hall and their concerns for my safety evaporated.”
“That’s great.” Harley replied with a genuine smile. “I always get a kick out of how you and your husband’s squires hold such high ranks when it comes to your military. Plus the fact that your ranking military leaders know not to question the Bat and his kids is fun too. I can’t tell you how many surface dwellers have lost everything by underestimating those kids.”
“Believe me, my husband has spent hours drilling into those old men the need to respect the members of the League.” Mera added with a sigh. “Not one of them is foolish enough to ignore a tactician like the legendary Batman. And if any simpleton ever makes that mistake there are countless naval officers waiting to ascend the ranks.”
A moment passed before the Queen looked to Harley again. “I am unfamiliar with surface world bonding rituals. My husband and all the other groomsmen will be walking down the aisle beside you and the bridesmaids correct?”
“Yes Mera.” Harley said. “I think they have a lineup planned but I have to check.”
“I was wondering about who would be on Orin’s arm while I am watching from the crowd.” Mera said in a more speculative tone. She sighed before looking down to her belly. “Not that I wished to stand for the duration of the ceremony in this condition. Otherwise I’m sure Lois would have asked for my participation.”
“Of course.” Harley said before giving the question more thought. “I think they’re gonna have Ivy on your hubby’s arm for the walk up to the altar. Get a kinda feng shui balance thing going on. The King of the high seas and the Goddess of the earth and forests ushering in new Love.”
“I hadn’t thought of that. How poetic.” Mera admitted before giving Harley another glance. “So your Ivy is a Goddess now?”
“She’s always been my Goddess.” Harley replied in a voice that provided the Queen with absolute certainty as to the depths of their Love.
The two women came to an unmarked door. Harley paused as Mera knocked before speaking in a loud and authoritative voice. “I hope you surface men are decent in there! The penalties for flashing the Queen of Atlantis are as gruesome as they are bloody!”
The door opened to reveal an older man with short trimmed white hair and a reserved yet polite expression. “Greetings your highness. Ms. Quinn.” Alfred said as he stepped aside to allow the two women entry.
“My Queen!” The King of Atlantis shouted as Mera came into his view.
“My King.” Mera said in a demure yet noticeably upbeat tone. “It is time for another royal tour, and my child and I have been without companionship for too long.”
“It would be my honor my love.” King Orin said as he linked arms with his wife and turned to face the blonde psychiatrist. “A pleasure as always Harley.”
“You too big guy.” Harley said with an overt wink to the flamboyant royal couple. The King and Queen strode from the groom suite and towards the reception hall where guests were gathering in large numbers. In their wake they left the former psychiatrist with the groom and more than a few groomsmen who were still visibly shaken by the Queen’s grizzly threat. “Well she’s as fun as she always is.” Harley said before turning to face the flabbergasted men all dressed in matching tuxedos.
“I’ll say.” Bruce Wayne replied with a slight nod towards Harley. “Good to see you again Quinn. I take it your other half is here as well?”
“You know she is Bruce.” Clark Kent said as he struggled to straighten out the bow tie at his neck. “Glad you two could make it Harley.”
“Hi Clark, Bruce. Glad to be here for the big day.” Harley greeted the two before giving the other groomsmen a second glance. “Well damn you’ve got just about all the founding members in here don’t cha?”
“How did she?” Asked one nervous looking red headed man standing off to the side with a dour looking square jawed brunette man and an equally dour looking ebony skinned man with a crew cut.
“She can read auras.” A much more pleasantly smiling ebony man with even shorter hair said as he extended a hand in greeting. “It’s good to see you again Harley.”
“You too J’onn.” Harley replied while taking his hand in both of hers. A moment passed before Harley glanced over the Martian’s shoulder to find a dapper looking older man with a thin mustache and jet black hair that was just starting to turn gray at the temples. “I hear you’ve been looking forward to meeting me and my girlfriend.”
“Quite right Dr. Quinzel.” Zartara said as he bowed to the woman who saved his life. “I have so much to thank the both of you for.”
“Please call me Harley.” The woman said as she stepped forward and placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. “I know a few things about losing yourself inside of an ancient mystical force. It sucks.”
“Indeed.” Zatara said with a smile as he straightened up and looked into the woman’s eyes for the first time. “Nabu may have been necessary for a few of the League’s battles, but I can’t say I miss him.”
“Well it’s a good thing that there are two semi professional witches willing to take up any magical subcontracting work the League has to offer.” Harley replied with a smirk that actually drew a slight smile from the magician. “Plus the magical father daughter team already on the roster of course.”
“Of course.” Zatara agreed with a lighthearted laugh.
Harley then turned back to the groom and the two new faces at his side. She smiled as she realized just who the men were likely to be. “So we haven’t met, but I’m sure Clark was going to introduce me to you two gentlemen.” She said as she approached the tall muscular man with a clean shaven head and light mahogany skin and the much older man with a similar skin tone offset by his almost shaved off graying black hair and thin beard.
“Where are my manners?” Clark asked as he pulled his attention away from the struggle with his bow tie. “Harley these are two of my closest friends from the Daily Planet. Jimmy Olsen, our prize winning photojournalist, and Perry White. Chief editor of the entire operation.”
“A pleasure.” Jimmy Olsen said as he stepped forward to shake Harley’s hand. “Clark hasn’t really said all that much about you.”
“Oh what’s there to tell.” Harley replied with a dismissive wave. “I’m the disgraced psychologist that helped Poison Ivy escape from Arkham Asylum and then disappeared with her on the high seas for months on end before accidentally getting our hands on two alien super weapons of unimaginable power.”
Silence fell across the room as all eyes turned to the grinning woman. No one knew how to respond to that particular stretch of babble. The looks of horror and bewilderment on the faces of both Green Lanterns, the Flash and Green Arrow were enough to still any reply. That they were joined by mixtures of incredulity and chagrin from Superman, Batman, Martian Manhunter, Zatara the Magician and Jimmy Olsen only added fuel to the fire. It was a minor miracle that Alfred maintained a stoic bulwark throughout the conversation and the ensuing silence. Thankfully the unsettling miasma of quiet dread was shattered by jovial laughter.
“Oh my god!” Perry White said after letting out deep guffaws of laughter that stunned the other men into diverting their eyes from the lone woman. “You and Lane were right Kent! This guest list is going to be better than any fireworks show I’ve seen in years.”
“I aim to please Mr. White.” Harley said as she pulled up a chair. The mood settled as everyone returned to watching the one bit of odd entertainment in the middle of the room. The strongest man alive was trapped in a ceaseless grudge match with an uncooperative length of black fabric.
“Damn this bow tie.” Clark muttered as Bruce and Jimmy suppressed the urge to chuckle at the Kryptonian and his daunting task.
“So just before I left the Bridal Suite Carol and Dinah said they were going to mingle with the crowd before the ceremony starts.” Harley said while deliberately not looking at Hal Jordan and Oliver Queen. “It would be a shame if some suave billionaire or statuesque Amazon were to sweep either of those ladies off their feet before the day even got started.”
“Shit.” Hal Jordan muttered to himself before standing and almost racing out the door. Oliver Queen looked from the now open doorway the man had disappeared through and then back to Harley who casually sipped from a wine glass Alfred had offered her on a serving tray. The archer’s head swung back and forth between the doorway and the woman. A moment of frantic hesitation passed until he scurried out the door before anyone could tell him otherwise.
“That was mean.” J’onn said with a far too amused undertone to his voice.
For his part John Stewart, the remaining Green Lantern in the room, sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose in exasperation. “Well I might as well go do another scan if those chuckleheads are that distracted.” The ebony skinned Lantern marched to the door and closed it on his way out. Laughter filled the room almost the instant the door was shut.
“Oh that has got to be your best superpower.” Perry White said as his laughter burst forth yet again.
“It’s up there.” Harley admitted with a wicked smile. “My Baby is way better at it than I am, but that might just be because of her whole weaponized pheromone thing.”
“So what else was going on in the Bridal Suite?” Jimmy asked with renewed interest. “I can’t imagine things are going easy between Lois and Cat.”
“Oh it can’t be all that bad.” Clark said as he renewed his struggle with the bow tie. “Lois and Cat like to put on a big show of actively despising each other, but when no one is looking they are as open and kind as two friends can be.”
“No way!” Jimmy said as Perry simply nodded along with the groom’s sentiment. “Really?”
“Oh yeah.” Perry told his best photographer. “Big time.”
“They may act cold and distant or indignant and contemptuous, but they really just have this close, kind of scary, bond.” Clark went on before undoing the bow tie and starting over from scratch.
“I’ve known a bunch of chicks with relationships like that.” Harley said causing more than a few heads to turn her way. “But I’m still always shocked when I find out that they’re just gal pals.”
“Just gal pals you say?” Bruce Wayne asked as he looked to the psychiatrist. “As opposed to what?”
“On the down low.” Harley replied but paused as she took in the wide eyed expressions of the men all around her. “I mean something more than just friends, you know? More intimate like, like…”
“Secret girlfriends.” J’onn said as the woman’s explanation trailed off.
“Exactly!” Harley practically shouted before going on. “I’m always surprised when I figure out that they aren’t secretly dating each other.”
“Thank god Cat isn’t Lois’ type.” Clark said as all of his groomsmen took Harley’s explanation with varying levels of bewilderment and surprise. An uneasy quiet fell over the room as more than a few men wondered just what else might be going on in the Bridal Suite.
********************
“Everything checks out on this sweep.” Cyborg said as Dick Grayson came up to stand beside him. “I’m gonna calibrate my scans to a higher spectrum.”
“Great work Victor. I just checked in with Barbara before she escorted the Queen to the Bridal Suite. She has Raven doing with magic all the things you’re doing with tech. So far there’s no sign of trouble.” Dick assured the ebony skinned young man. “And it’s good to see that you got the hologram running in time.”
“Kaldur, Garth and Tula offered a magic spell fix but I wanted to prove I could do this myself. Couldn’t let the sight of a dude with half a metal face and way too many robot parts mess up the wedding album.” Cyborg admitted before looking over Dick’s shoulder at a group of three boys rapidly approaching. “That seems like trouble.”
“What’s going… well crap.” Dick began to ask but faltered as he turned around and saw the boy he had passed the mantel of Robin down to. “Hey Tim, who’s this?”
“Dick!” Tim Drake practically shouted as he and two other boys ran up to the young man. “You know Billy Batson right?”
“Howdy.” Billy said with a quick wave and a far from inconspicuous wink to Dick.
Dick just rolled his eyes. The reveal that Captain Marvel was a magical construct conjured from the dreams and aspirations of a ten year old boy was just one of many recent turns that had shocked the entire League as well as the two support teams. “Yeah I know all about Billy.” Dick finally told Tim while staring at the third boy of the group. “Who is your new friend?”
“Hi.” The new boy said with a timid wave. “I’m Carter grant.” He all but whispered his name. The quiet admission was still loud enough to noticeably widen Dick’s eyes. The young man who led the Titans did not expect to find the son of the infamous media mogul mingling with his teammates.
“Carter is awesome!” Tim went on to gush about his new friend. “You think Bruce and Alfred will let him hang out the next time his mom comes to Gotham?”
“I don’t know.” Dick admitted as he looked between the three boys staring up at him with ever more pleading looks in their eyes. “You’ll both have to ask Bruce and Ms. Grant.”
“Probably Selina too.” Victor chuckled as another young couple walked up to the group. “How’d things go on your end Kyle?”
“We’re clear on the outer perimeter.” Kyle Rayner said as he and his fiancé Cassie shared looks with Dick and Victor. “We were gonna check the gifts table one more time before the groom’s parents get here. I’m pretty sure the big guy wants me to hang around them for the rest of the day.”
“God knows we can’t let anything happen to the Kents while this powder keg of a wedding is set to go off.” Dick grumbled to himself.
“I have a good feeling about today.” Cassie said in a tone that almost concealed the extent of her foreknowledge. The mild cover was quickly undone as she looked directly at Dick and gave him the most blatant and glaringly obvious of winks.
“Come on Carter, Billy.” Tim said as he realized his foster brother was more than preoccupied with running security for the big event. “Lets go watch the band set up for the reception later.”
“Cool.” Carter said in a way that left the young heroes all around him thinking he was far too easily impressed. Before anyone could question the young trio they were off and running.
“Oh no.” Cassie muttered under her breath.
“What is it Babe?” Kyle asked the young blonde. “Vibes?” Before she could answer her feet were carrying her across the floor of the reception hall. The young men followed in her wake and quickly found her looming over the gifts table.
“Oh no.” Cassie continued to mutter to herself as she began to sift through the piles of wrapped presents. “No. No this is no good. This will not do. Not at all.”
“Kyle what is it?” Dick asked in a more concerned tone as he noticed both Raven and Jamie Reyes walking up to join them. Both had dour looks on their faces.
“We just got a ping.” Jamie said as his hands were quickly covered by a dark blue substance that formed gauntlets over his skin. The visually striking shift in apparel looked like something out of a cheesy sci-fi movies.
“Ah ha!” Cassie shouted as she lifted a small, unassuming box above her head. Her voice lowered several octaves and grew desperate as the heroes stared at her in confusion. “We need to get rid of this right now!”
“What’s in the bo…” Dick’s question was cut off as a loud beeping sound came from Victor who stood by his left side and a low humming sound came from Jamie off to his right.
Raven’s eyes filled with shadows as they often did while she worked her magic. “Oh Goddess no.” Raven said as the color returned to her eyes. “She’s right. Get that thing out of here this second.”
“My Blue Beetle tech is picking up very low level radiation coming form that gift.” Jamie said as he raised one slightly glowing blue glove up to the box cradled in Cassie’s hands. “Why does it feel like I’ve studied this chemical structure before?”
“Because you have.” Victor said as his own scans finished. “It’s kryptonite.”
********************
“Well the kids just reported in a threat they’ve already handled.” Bruce told Harley and the rest of the groomsmen still in the room. “Somebody thought it would be funny to give Clark a sampler pack of Kryptonite.”
“Oh, I just got word of what Barbara is saying to Ivy and the girls.” Harley said as her ring let out a soft pink glow. “There was a note with the gift. It said, “Hey there buddy congrats on getting the girl. Here’s a little something in case her ex comes sniffing around again.” She paused to consider what her ring was showing her alone. “It looks like it was written in professional calligraphy.”
“Well thank god the kids took care of that whole mess.” Said the redheaded man standing off to the side.
“It has already been stored in John Smith’s shielded chest cavity.” J’onn J’onzz added as he got a far away look.
“Oh, is that the tall, white, bald guy who doesn’t have an aura?” Harley asked. “We passed him on the way in. He’s Red Tornado’s remote controlled drone or something isn’t he?”
All around the room stunned men shot more than a few horrified looks Harley’s way. The redheaded man practically cringed as his head snapped back and forth between the woman and Perry White. “She’s not wrong.” The ebony newspaper editor said in a casual tone as he checked his phone.
“So wait, he has an empty chest compartment for storage, like Bender from Futurama style?” Harley asked the room. J’onn, Bruce and Clark burst into another fit of laughter that was soon joined by Jimmy and Zatara. Alfred let a slight smile curl his lips while doing his best to maintain a professional demeanor. Even the yet unnamed redhead did little to hide his amused reaction.
“Oh, I needed that.” Clark said as the laughter died down. “Thanks Harley. Bruce, tell the kids they did great. It would have really sucked to die while opening presents with Lois.”
“Might not have just killed you.” Bruce said with far less cheer in his voice. “It was a sampler pack.”
“Oh, right. There are a bunch of different flavors of kryptonite.” Harley said as she did her best to recall ancillary facts from old comics she had been shown many lifetimes ago. “Everyone in the multiverse knows what green does and most also know about red. I’m blanking on the others.”
“Everyone in the multiverse? What the hell is that supposed to mean?” The redheaded man asked with a more than incredulous tremor to his voice.
“It’s a past lives slash alternate dimension thing.” Clark said, only drawing further confused looks out of some of the men present. “Apparently most of us are famous cartoon characters in a bunch of Harley and Ivy’s past lives.”
“No way.” Jimmy Olsen said as he and Perry White shared concerned looks.
Harley smiled before going into an explanation that would surely cause a few of the men around her to question their world views. “In most worlds Superman’s comic book has been in publication on and off since the forties.” She paused to think the dates over for a moment before going on. “Maybe the late thirties. I can never remember. Batman’s too now that I think about it. People know about kryptonite. Many people refer to things they can’t handle, can’t overcome or just plain make them horny as their own personal kryptonite. For example Ivy’s smile is my kryptonite.”
“Apparently the gift contained green, red and pink.” Bruce said as he tried to overlook the absurdity of the conversation.
“Oh god those are my three least favorite flavors of kryptonite.” Clark muttered as it looked like he was about to finally get the upper hand on his bow tie.
“I heard about red and what happened to Superman after his exposure.” The redheaded man said before looking back to Clark. “What does pink do again?” He asked. Harley couldn’t help but smile as she noticed Jimmy visibly cringing at the mention of the rare substance.
“Oh you guys have no idea how annoying my last run in with pink kryptonite was.” Clark began to explain.
********************
Loud cackles of laughter filled the Bridal Suite. Anyone passing by the closed door would have grown concerned if not for the fact that the Bride was the source of the loudest laughter.
“So then I walk into our apartment and the lights are turned down low. I turn a corner and right there in the middle of our living room is a shirtless Jimmy Olsen tied to a chair!” Lois went on to tell the women gathered around. “I’m about to run up and untie him when Clark in his full costume floats between us. He had this panicked look in his eyes and he starts talking in this concerned monotone. “Lois, this, this isn’t what it looks like.” He said just as Jimmy screamed out “Lois! Help me!” I was about to shove my way past Smallville when he says the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.”
“What did he say?” Selina was practically on the edge of her seat.
Ivy and Cat shared a look as they noticed Lucy Lane’s horrified grimace grow more and more tortured as her sister’s story went on.
Lois smirked wickedly before she continued with the tale. She immediately put a dour expression on her face and lowered her voice to try and portray the stern yet confused tone her fiancé had used that day. “I was thinking we could have a three way.”
Nearly all the women in the room burst into laughter once more as the tale of Clark’s last encounter with pink kryptonite was retold. Even Lucy failed to stifle a giggling fit of her own. It was a long time before they each stopped long enough to draw in fresh breath. Lois continued once all eyes were on her again.
“So I just look at him and roll my eyes.” The bride explained. “I said, “With Jimmy? Clark we talked about this! Did you even try to contact with Zoe Saldana or Halle Berry?”
“Oh my god you didn’t.” Zatanna cried out with another laugh.
“Oh she did.” Cat said with a delighted smirk. “You girls have no idea what Lane is capable of.”
“Quiet you!” Lois snapped at Cat. “I can’t have you spreading lies about old times around all these ladies. Where was I? Oh, that’s right. Jimmy was tied up and screaming, “Lois! Help! He’s crazy! Get me out of here!” So then Clark just puts a finger on Jimmy’s lips and whispers “Hush now my chocolate Adonis.” in the deepest come hither voice I’ve ever heard. I seriously think pink kryptonite messes with his voice box of something while messing with his libido.”
Laughter erupted again as Lois wrapped up the story. Few of the women in the Bridal Suite could contain themselves once they learned the embarrassing story about the iconic hero.
“Well at least you both have the same type.” Diana said with a smug grin as she sipped from her glass.
“Yeah, who would have thought that these two have a thing for gorgeous African Americans.” Cat added with just as much smug satisfaction as the Amazon. Several women continued to laugh at the bride’s expense.
“Yeah, yeah.” Lois muttered as Cat came close to finishing her hair.
Barbara realized something as the laughter went on. She gave both Cat and Lucy an appraising look before turning back to Lois with what seemed like a pertinent question. “Lois, is it really a good idea to talk about kryptonite and your ex on your wedding day?”
“What?” Lois asked as she looked to the redhead. “Barbara, Cat and Lucy are both in the know.”
“Please.” Cat scoffed. “I spotted that over muscled alien masquerading as a farm boy in our newsroom weeks before you caught on Lane. What an all powerful alien is doing rubbing his secret identity in the faces of the international press all day is beyond me. I could hardly stand my time there. Why he would willingly subject himself to it for so many years is beyond me.”
“Everyone needs a hobby.” Ivy said with a much softer expression. The possible explanation raised another laugh from one of the bridesmaids.
“Can you imagine if he had picked stamp collecting instead of being a news reporter?” Zatanna practically fell out of her chair at the absurd idea before going on in an equally absurd monotone. “What is that fiendish Lex Luthor doing now? I can’t stop him today. I just found the last blue jay stamp for my… what the hell do they call their stamp, book, things? Scrapbooks?”
“God that would suck for all of us.” Cat muttered as Lois and Lucy just nodded along. “Can you imagine trusting the fate of the entire planet to an anal retentive stamp collector from Kansas? There would be rioting in the streets if people ever found out.”
“And when did your sister find out Lois?” Selina asked as she watched Lucy fidget nervously.
“A few months ago.” Lois went on in a much more restrained tone. “She came by to bury the hatchet and Clark was, well…”
“It’s not important.” Lucy said as a panicked look crossed her eyes.
“Oh my god.” Selina let out a gasp as she closely watched the two sisters’ expressions. “She walked in on the two of you idiots while he was still in his costume!”
“Just the cape and the boots.” Lucy admitted quietly.
“Lucy!” Lois all but screamed in a panic.
“Oh enough with that.” Cat snapped at the two of them as a round of uncontrollable giggling swept through the room. “So your little sister got to see his big, muscular, farm boy ass. Everyone has an embarrassing story about walking in on family. It’s called having a social life!”
“You guys would not believe the number of times Harley and I have almost been walked in on.” Ivy muttered in between sips of champagne. “Thank the Goddess for mystical alarm wards.”
“That sound like cheating.” Selina shot a glare at the green woman.
“It is.” Zatanna said before raising one hand in the air half way between Ivy and herself. The green witch met her half way and many of the other bridesmaids just rolled their eyes at the far too proud high five.
“Anyway, I was worried at first but got over it.” Lucy went on. “He makes my sister happy. That’s all that matters. Plus she’s totally got him whipped.” Lucy added with a sharp whipping sound and quick flick of her wrist through the air over her head. “Why would I ruin that for her?” Laughter filled the room once more as Lucy’s rhetorical question went unanswered. A moment later Lucy gave Barbara a pointed look and asked her own question of the redhead. “And just what did the daughter of Gotham City’s police commissioner have to do to be included in the big secret?”
“Oh don’t worry about Babs Lucy.” Ivy said in a far too casual tone that silenced Barbara’s retort. “Her night job is a lot more exciting than she lets on.”
“And just what would you know about my night job Poison Ivy?” Barbara asked with a newly threatening edge to her voice.
“Oh please Sweetie.” Ivy replied with a dismissive wave. “Harley and I pretty much know about everyone important who dons a mask.” She paused for a moment before admitting the one major identity that hadn’t concerned them as much as the others. “Except for maybe the Flash, and that’s just because his mask gets passed around more than most.”
********************
“So Clark, is it really a good idea to be openly talking about Superman stuff with so many people in the room?” The question came from the redheaded man whose name Harley had yet to hear.
The groom just laughed the man’s concern off before looking him in the eye. “Barry, don’t worry about it. Harley is good people. She and her girl figured it out months ago and haven’t said a word about me to anyone.”
“That isn’t really what I was…” Barry tried to say before being cut off by an outburst from the slender blonde.
“Barry Allen!” Harley shouted. “That’s who you are! Oh man, I’ve been trying to figure out which one you were since I walked in the room.”
“Excuse me?” Barry asked as he turned to face Harley.
“Oh hey, don’t worry about it.” Harley told him. “I’m not interested in outing anybody here. Your secret is safe dude.”
“What, I don’t have a secret.” Barry tried to derail the conversation to no avail.
“I could totally tell you were a speedster by the bits of lightning trailing off your aura. Plus this room was full of founding members.” Harley went on. “But so many guys have worn that red suit in the stories from other worlds that I didn’t really give much thought to your street name until I sat down across from you.”
“What do you mean so many guys have worn my suit… I mean.” Barry tried to ask but quickly realized the corner he had backed himself into and tried to backtrack.
“Hey don’t worry about it too much.” Harley assured him. “The things teams of writers come up with in other dimensions rarely play out the same in worlds like this one. Hell, in the comics Batman has a son with Talia al Ghul, both he and Green Arrow get courted by Ra’s to lead the League of Shadows, Lex Luthor gets elected president a few times, Ivy ends up a mass murder with a god complex and I’m hopelessly infatuated with the Joker. But none of that is ever going to happen here.”
“I had a son with Talia?” Bruce asked just before all the air left his lungs.
“You might have if things played out differently in this world Bruce.” Harley told him as she realized what she had let slip. “But now you are much more likely to have one with Selina. Is that really something you didn’t see coming? Didn’t want?”
“I… I do.” Bruce admitted. A moment passed in silence before a wide smile took over his face. “Oh god I really do. I never dreamed of, but I want that with her so much.”
“There.” Harley said in a moderately proud tone. “And now that the seed is planted all we need to do is sit back and wait for you to get your act together.”
“What do you mean by that Harley?” J’onn asked as he glanced between Bruce and Harley with concern in his eyes.
“I mean I have stood by and watched Bruce and Selina fall in love and break each other’s hearts more times than I can count.” Harley told the Martian. “You still remember those first few lives, don’t you J’onn? How badly the man we call Bruce here screwed things up there.”
“Oh.” J’onn let out in a whisper as the truth hit him. He looked upon the billionaire with a truly mournful gaze in his eyes.
Bruce saw the sadness and pity there and was instantly on guard. “What is she talking about?”
“The first time through your proposed and went through all the steps a normal couple is supposed to take.” Harley explained with regret heavy in her voice. “But we were all so young then and you both had the worst families and guest lists imaginable. You were shown a vision of a future based on a lie. You thought you would eventually become an abusive drunk like the man who raised you. So you took it on yourself to save her from that life.”
“Oh Master Bruce.” Alfred said as he let a hand rest on Bruce’s shoulder. The butler fought back the tears building in his eyes. He couldn’t imagine the boy he raised ever raising a hand to a loved one. The fighting that ensued when young Jason returned from the dead had almost destroyed Bruce Wayne’s sense of self. Alfred had stood by and did everything in his power to heal the grown man he had raised since the loss of his former employers. Yet it never seemed to be enough.
“You left her at the altar because you believed the words and illusions of a liar.” Harley told Bruce. “And that’s why you’re a dummy.”
“But what if that other version of me was going to really…” Bruce began to ask.
“Stop!” Harley snapped. “I know you Bruce. Even with a completely different childhood and life you don’t have that in you. I have stood at your side each and every time you actually get around to marrying that woman and I will for every time you do in every world I awaken to. I know that you guys belong together. Sometimes it takes a little prodding on my part to get your head out of you own butt, but she is the one thing in any world that makes you happy. I’ll never regret helping you find your way to her.”
“Am I always so easily manipulated?” Bruce asked as he tired to quell his own emotions.
“Yes.” Harley admitted with a smile. “And I won’t lie. Having a doctorate in psychology from before I came to my senses in this world helps. But you two were already living together when you met me. So you can’t say I forced you into anything you didn’t want. Same goes for you Clark.” She finished with a glare at the groom. The reporter simply gulped nervously as he paused his efforts with the half done bow tie.
“Wouldn’t dream of it Harley.” Clark replied before refocusing on the tie. “More than happy with how far Lois and I have come.”
“As confusing and enlightening as all this is, that wasn’t what I was talking about.” Barry said as he once more looked to Clark. The reporter looked up and followed the speedster’s gaze to Jimmy and Perry standing at either of his sides.
“Oh.” Clark said before his eyes widened. “Oh! No Barry, relax. Jimmy knows. He’s one of my most loyal friends.”
Jimmy Olsen just smirked at that sentiment. “Aside from Bibbo you mean.”
“You know that’s an overstatement.” Clark said with a grin.
“And your boss over there?” Barry asked.
“Hmmm?” Perry White said as he looked up from his phone for the first time since Barry had asked about Superman directly. “I’m sorry I didn’t hear the question. I had something retarded in my ear.”
“Ouch.” Jimmy whispered as he smirked at his boss’ jibe.
“What?” Barry asked in confusion.
“Oh were we talking about Superman?” Perry White asked the room as if he hadn’t been standing there listening to the far too personal tales of Bruce Wayne’s love life. “Our official stance at the Daily Planet is that Superman does not have a secret identity. He’s always Superman. Obviously he hangs his cape up somewhere, probably the North or South Pole considering how good his ears are and how loud our species can be.”
“But I am not about to send my people out on some wild goose chase to find out every one of the big guy’s deepest darkest secrets. Whoever he might be!” Perry paused and winked at Clark. The overt gesture brought out a loud cry of laughter from Harley and a far from professional smirk from Alfred. Bruce, J’onn and Zatara couldn’t help but chuckle.
“No, the Daily Planet and all my people there are journalists. Not like the vultures over at TMZ or the National Enquirer.” The chief editor went on. “I’m not gonna have Lane ask the big guy boxers or briefs and I’m certainly not sending poor Jimmy here out at night to sift through his garbage cans. His private life may be the story of the century but after all the dust settles it’s just one story. And if anyone ever reported that story it would mean the big guy couldn’t flit around the sky pulling senior citizens out of trees and pet cats out of hostage situations. All while smiling for Jimmy here in those nice, juicy, front page worthy, candid shots.”
“Hell outing him might force him into retirement altogether, and my paper can’t take that hit to over half of our business model.” Perry went on in a far more harsh tone. “Whatever he does in his downtime is his business. Same for all the other nuts in that League of his. So long as he goes out of his way to keep the world turning he’s entitled to any day job he can hold down when out of the uniform. And it’s like I said, breaking the story of the century gets us exactly one story no one will care about a month later and makes too many enemies. I don’t know about any of you but I’m not going ruin the personal life of a man who can throw anyone who pisses him off into space! Am I right Kent?”
“Yes sir Mr. White!” Clark sounded off with a wide grin on his face. The reporter had grown to love the little willful ignorance game Perry had come up with a few months after Superman stories became a regular fixture in the papers.
“See? Kent gets it!” Perry White all but shouted to the now giggling men around the room. “And he’s hardly ever around when the big guy shows up at the office!” Loud cackles of laughter filled the room and the playful smirk on Perry White’s face was all too evident.
********************
“So comic books.” Zatanna said after a long lull in the conversation.
“And movies, television shows, cartoons.” Ivy went on. “The next lifetime where we meet Bruce he’ll probably faint when we tell him he lived one of our past lives as “The Batman!”
“He’s a big fan of himself?” Barbara asked with a sideways glance at Ivy.
“Batman and Superman are two of human history’s most popular fictional characters.” Ivy said as if the information was obvious. “Right up there with Han Solo, Jesus and Hercules.”
“The fact that my people’s greatest enemy is remembered so fondly vexes me to no end.” Diana grumbled as she downed the last of her champagne.
“You have no idea how much his life’s story has been cleaned up to be sold to modern audiences.” Ivy went on. “On the plus side most of the worlds that give him his own tv show also make a spinoff show about an unstoppable warrior woman. She meets up with a plucky blonde sidekick that eventually becomes the plucky blonde queen of the Amazons.” She paused with a slight smirk before adding one last detail. “And the warrior woman’s not so secret lover.”
“Really?” Diana asked with renewed interest. The idea of such a character, seemingly built up from her people’s core values, intrigued the princess. “And the people of man’s world really lionized such a woman in the fictions they use to distract themselves?”
“Men liked the show because the lead actress looked good in a leather skirt and bronze trimmed leather corset.” Ivy said before a sly smile played across her lips. “And women well, the show had a very devout lesbian following.”
“But comic books?” Selina asked as more of the redhead’s confusing stories of parallel dimensions came to light. “Featuring pretty much everyone at this wedding?”
“Have Harley tell you about the embarrassing Aquaman Underoos story from her and Bruce’s Kindergarten days.” Ivy replied with an almost wistful smile. “His name wasn’t Bruce Wayne our first time through but she and I still see so much of our old friend in your fiancé Selina.”
“Fiancé?” Selina all but shrieked. “He hasn’t even asked…”
“He will.” Ivy cut her off with a promise.
“So you’re saying you and your girlfriend know our future from books you read in past lives.” Barbara drew the conclusion she thought the green woman was leading her towards. She couldn’t know how far off she was.
“Goddess no.” Ivy said with an almost horrified shiver. “Nothing in any of Xander’s old books is going to happen here. Not if we have anything to say about it.”
“Could that be the reason you took out Lex Luthor and the Joker the way you did?” Cat chimed in.
“We didn’t kill Luthor!” Ivy protested in an agitated tone the other women hadn’t quite expected. “We just trapped him in a giant crystal and dropped him on an alien planet. And that clown was a menace to all life on this planet.”
“Really?” Lucy asked as the assertion silenced each of the women present who had suffered through prior encounters with the Joker. “I get that he was a mass murderer but…”
“No, you don’t get it.” Barbara shot the brunette down. “That fucking clown had it coming. What Ivy and her girl did to him was a public service.”
“Listen, I could tell you all about the ways the Joker might have ripped the League in half by killing or crippling some of the women in this very room.” Ivy drew attention away from the staring match between the other redhead and the bride’s sister. “I could tell you how if you ever wake up in an alternate dimension branching off of this one you will probably run into President Luthor and a version of Superman who is mourning the loss of his wife. I could even talk about how an affair between Aquaman and Wonder Woman would drag the entire planet into world war three.”
“I would never lay with a man!” Diana shouted in disgust.
“Not even for a three-way with me and Bruce?” Selina asked with just a hint of hopefulness in her tone. Everyone but Ivy stopped what they were doing and stared at the cat burglar in shock. Diana titled her head to the side and gave the blonde sitting across from her an appraising look. “What?” Selina asked as she noticed the looks she was getting from the other bridesmaids and the bride herself. “She’s on both of our free pass lists. I figured if I ever needed a really good last minute birthday present for Bruce it wouldn’t hurt to ask her.”
“I thought you were like super straight Selina?” Zatanna asked as she eyed the woman up and down.
“No one is that straight.” Selina replied. “Besides, if I ever want to try being spit roasted by my man and a beautiful woman I might as well ask the queen of all the lesbians to do the honors.”
“Just because she’s an Amazon princess doesn’t necessarily mean she’s the queen of all the lesbians.” Lucy remarked only to receive a head shake from Cat.
“No that’s exactly what it means.” The media mogul said. “There was a floor vote at the last big gathering, you know, Dyke-Con, and we all decided that Diana here is the undisputed queen of all the lesbians.”
“We all chipped in a dollar each to get her a tiara and a little sash that reads “Queen of all the Lesbians!” Ivy added while sharing a playful smirk with Cat. “Anyway I could go on and on about things that happened in stories from other worlds. But that’s a little like telling you that I know the Empire will be defeated by a rag tag group of rebels and some Ewoks.”
“Whoa there, spoilers!” Cat cried out. “There are some children here that might not have seen the classics.”
“Oh my god Cat how old do you think I am?” Lucy grumbled at the blonde.
“Barely old enough to know better but still young enough to make all the fun mistakes with what you’ve got.” Cat said after giving the girl a careful assessment.
“That’s my sister you’re talking about Grant.” Lois muttered.
“Which is why I’m trying to advise her against giving Olsen all the goods right off the bat.” Cat told the scandalized bride.
“Oh that’s interesting.” Ivy said as she gave Lucy a closer look. “Her aura did a little fluttery jump when you mentioned the photographer. Let me test something.” Ivy then held up her ring and studied its soft glow for a second. Little did the other bridesmaids know what she had set in motion.
********************
“Oh would you look at that.” Harley murmured as her ring let out a soft glow. She then turned her widest grin on the photographer at Clark’s side. “So Jimmy, have ya met Lucy?”
“Huh? Wha… I mean.” Jimmy began to stammer out a reply only to fall short as Harley began cackling.
“Awesome!” Harley cried out as she turned back to her ring, ignoring the confused looks from the men in the room with her. “The girls are gonna get a kick out of this.”
********************
“Oh yeah, he’s just as smitten as she is.” Ivy said as she watched the glow from her ring. “Harley just mentioned her name and his aura shot through the roof.”
“Well damn if that isn’t a ringing endorsement.” Zatanna said with a laugh.
“In knew it all along.” Cat said with a board huff.
“No!” Lucy protested. “There is nothing to know going on here!”
“Oh honey.” Lois said while trying valiantly to hold back her own laughter.
“Hey, why don’t we just go back to the fact that Ivy over here knows all about everyone’s secret identities and just blabbed about it in front of the “Queen of All Media”? Huh? That sounds like fun.” The frantic pleading note to Lucy’s voice did little to force the change in topics but Ivy decided to go easy on the poor young woman.
“Oh like Cat was going to do anything about it.” Ivy dismissed with a wave of her hand. “She may have some of you fooled with the Ice Queen act but she’d never go through with publicly outing anyone here.”
“CatCo has no plans to dig into the personal lives of overly civic minded busy bodies.” Cat droned out a response as if she was reading off a teleprompter. “I won’t out anyone for being secretly gay, straight, transgender, costumed vigilante or republican.”
“Pretty sure you’ve outed people for that last one.” Lois chimed in.
“Oh hush you slut.” Cat snapped as she reapplied the faintest layer of makeup to Lois’s cheeks. “None of those egomaniacs were secretive about any of the lies they spewed. I’ll gladly rake any out and proud right wingers over the coals.”
“So how many of you girls brought dates to this shindig?” Lois asked as she saw Cat was finished with her last minute preparations. “Aside from Ivy of course.”
“Of course.” Ivy said while raising a new glass of champagne that seemed to appear out of nowhere. “Zatanna are you magicking these drinks into existence?”
“Don’t give me that look Ivy.” The magician complained. “The boys have Alfred in there with them. If one of you ladies had a full blown man servant half as good as him I wouldn’t have to bother.”
“I’m sadly between assistants.” Cat remarked as she sipped from her own glass.
“Thanks for your help Zatanna.” Lois added.
“You’re welcome Lois.” Zatanna replied before giving the bride’s last question some thought. “I came stag unless you count my father.”
“Ditto.” Barbara added.
“I brought Brucie.” Selina chimed in to no one’s surprise.
“Amy.” Diana said.
“I always bring Carter to events like these.” Cat admitted. “He helps remind me that it’s less about schmoozing with socialites and more about small talk with actual friends.”
All eyes turned to Lucy for a moment. The bride’s sister all but cringed under the weight of that scrutiny. It was a long, tense moment before she openly admitted the truth. “Okay, fine, alright. I came alone because I was planning on leaving with Jimmy.”
“Like there was ever any doubt.” Lois said before looking to the woman who had given the flimsiest answer. “Have anything to share with the class Barbara?”
“Nope.” The redhead said as she sipped champagne.
“Not yet anyway. We’ll have to scope out the honeys together.” Zatanna added with a playful smile before a frown clouded her gaze. “Didn’t you come with Dick?”
“That’s what she said.” Selina cried out in a far too pleased tone as all the other women groaned. “Oh come on. That was a classic.”
“Ivy you’re her friend right?” Lucy pleaded. “Any advice on curtailing her dirty mind?”
“Oh there isn’t anything you can do about that.” Ivy stated as she gave Selina an almost proud smile. “Plus that was pretty tame by Selina’s standards. Hardly the dirtiest thing I’ve heard her say this lifetime. It’s not ever the dirtiest thing she’s said this morning.”
“No I didn’t come here with Grayson.” Barbara said in a clipped tone that hid her emotions only partially. “But I have promised several dances to him, Tim and my dad.”
“Aww, that’s no fun.” Zatanna grumbled. “Now it’s just Lucy and me doing the bachelorette thing and she’s already called dibs on her piece of man candy.”
“Don’t blame me Zatanna.” Barbara said before a more playful smirk cropped up. “Blame Lois for stacking her big day with monogamous lesbians, whipped boy toys and almost married spinsters.”
“Hey now!” Selina protested only be cut off by Ivy’s laughter.
Ivy continued to chuckle for a long moment before she fixed the cat burglar with a disarming smile. “She’s not wrong.” Her eyes then found Barbara’s across the room and the two redheads shared a warm smile. They both knew the other had no interest in weeding through lonely men at the reception.
********************
“Right this way Mr. and Mrs. Kent.” Kyle said as he and his fiancé led the older couple through the back halls of the reception area. “The wedding hall is beginning to fill up with guests. Once both wedding parties are ready we can start.”
“Of course you two will get front row seats.” Cassie added as she walked with one arm intertwined with Martha Kent’s. “You both must be so proud.”
“Lois is a wonderful woman.” Martha said with noticeable pride in her voice. “I know she’ll make Clark very happy.”
“I’m just glad our son finally wised up and sealed the deal before anymore mad scientists or bored billionaires threw their hats in the ring.” Jonathan Kent added as they entered the wedding hall and began the long walk to the pews at the front of the wide open room.
“Oh like Clark would ever be bone headed enough to watch her slip away.” Martha dismissed her husband’s worries with a laugh. “My boy knows a good thing when it falls into his lap.”
Kyle and Cassie shared an amused smile as the proud tone in the woman’s voice came through loud and clear. The young couple couldn’t help but be charmed by the older pair who had raised the world’s strongest hero. As they seated the Kents Kyle and Cassie wondered just how much the world owed these two people for their lifetime of work spent molding the man of steel.
********************
“Ah ha!” Clark shouted triumphantly as his hands came away from his neatly centered bow tie.
“Finally.” Bruce said as he set his champagne glass aside. “I was almost ready to call Barbara in here to tie the damn thing for you.”
“Why not just have Alfred do it?” Jimmy asked while glancing over at the smirking butler.
“Then he would have lost the bet.” J’onn said with a chuckle. “The founding members all took bets on just how long it would take Clark to finish dressing himself without help from one of us.”
“I’m not that helpless.” Clark complained in an annoyed huff.
“Yes you are Kent.” Perry added with a chuckle of his own. “Well it’s probably about time I checked in with the bride. Care to join me Ms. Quinn?”
“I’d be delighted.” Harley told the older reporter.
“Tell Diana she won the pot while you’re at it.” Bruce added as Harley and Perry linked arms and strolled out the door.
“Sure thing Brucie.” Harley called out just as the door closed. “So I take it you’re giving the bride away.” She said once they were out in the service halls that led back to the reception and wedding areas as well as other prep rooms.
“That would be correct.” Perry White admitted with a sigh as he thought of his few brief confrontations with General Sam Lane. “Politics aside, I just don’t understand that man.”
“I’m sure Lois and Lucy feel the same way.” Harley lamented as they walked back to the Bridal Suite. “It wasn’t too much of a shock when Ivy and I figured out that the general wasn’t here today.”
“So you’ve met the man?” Perry asked in a newly curious tone.
“Oh no.” Harley admitted with a sly smile. “Let’s just say Ivy and I have more than our fair share of reasons to distrust the military. Too many worlds have slipped into chaos because a handful of generals decided to play god in secret underground compounds.”
“I’ll bet.” Perry agreed with a solemn nod. “But enough talk about jack booted thuggery. I’m much more interested in how you and your partner met.”
“It was my freshman year of college and I had gone as far as I could practicing witchcraft on my own.” Harley began in a tone of reverence and awe. “One of the student groups that met weekly was a Wicca group. I went to one meeting, got bored out of my mind from all the empty headed talk of bake sales and sisterhood empowerment clichés, and met the most amazing woman to ever walk the earth.” A sly smile crept across her face as she recounted the story yet again. “She was just as fed up with all the blessed wannabes and we started holding nightly meetings of our own.”
“That must have been fun.” Perry said suggestively as he nudged her shoulder. Harley only sighed and shook her head at his innuendo.
“Not as much as it sounds.” She lamented. “I was hopelessly straight and just barely getting over the fact that the werewolf I dated in high school cheated on me with another werewolf.”
“Werewolves?” Perry asked as he stopped dead in his tracks. “Seriously? Werewolves are real?”
“Long, totally different, story.” Harley said before forging ahead. “She was so patient with me. I put her through hell with all my indecisive second guessing. Even when the wolf came back to try and rekindle our relationship she was willing to step aside and let me be happy with someone else.”
“I can’t even imagine.” Perry said as a lull in Harley’s story dragged on. For a few silent moments they walked the back halls of the reception area. Perry almost jumped when Harley spoke up again.
“I chose her of course.” She said with a much lighter air. “Even when my friends and I had to storm one of those secret underground military chop shop compounds to save my ex I still chose her. I told him I’d always care but I couldn’t be in love with him and then I sent him on his way.” Music began to pick up in the distance as the wedding hall filled up. Word must have spread of the groom’s bow tie because Hal Jordan, Oliver Queen and John Stewart raced past Perry and Harley on their way back to the groom suite.
“I came to her dorm.” Harley went on in a whisper. “The whole town was under a black out I caused because we needed to storm the secret base so I had this extra flamey candle in my hands and I was ready to finally come out to the world. She was waiting up for me. Even though she was convinced I’d choose him, that I would break her heart again, she was waiting for me. I swore I’d make up for all the pain I put her through, and she took me in with open arms.”
“That’s beautiful.” Perry said as he held back more than a few tears. It was another minute of silent walking before he realized there was something he was missing. “But if you two met in college how did Ivy become a plant person?”
Harley stopped in her tracks and stared at the man. She blinked once. Then she laughed. Full throated belly laughter poured from the slender blonde as she doubled over in her mirth. Perry White stood in shock for a moment before Harley looked up to him once more.
“Oh Mr. White.” Harley chuckled as she came back up for air. “I needed that. This all happened in our first life.”
“So I’ve heard.” He said as he gave the woman an appraising look. “To be honest I didn’t actually believe what Lane and Kent told me you said in the interview about other dimensions. I even called up a scientist or two to explain things slowly a few more times. I was beyond confused when Professor Hamilton said that the existence of magic was scientifically proven and documented.”
“In that first life I spent a few short years loving her with all my heart.” Harley went on as if his doubts and confusion mattered not. “I screwed up and ruined things but she still took me back. Then I lost her forever.”
“But you found her again.” Perry said as if the current fact could negate the pain of the distant past.
“I spent the rest of that life struggling to find meaning without her.” Harley countered his claim. “It was all in vain. I cast a spell on my deathbed and cast my memories and a shard of my soul into the void. I eventually found her and did everything in my power to prove I was worthy of her. And she took me back with open arms. Again. This world marks a hundred and forty two times where she has done that. I wasn’t about to let a little thing like her criminal record stop us from being together.”
“So you helped her pass a psych evaluation and sailed off into the sunset on a second hand cargo freighter.” Perry repeated the very public story he had heard from Gotham City’s floundering news outlets.
“What can I say?” Harley asked as they came to a halt outside the bridal Suite. “I’m a hopeless romantic.”
“Yeah you are.” Ivy agreed as she opened the door and pulled Harley into her arms. “Goddess I missed you Sweetie.”
“I Love you Baby.” Harley promised as she nuzzled into Ivy’s neck.
“How did she know her girl was coming back?” Lucy asked as Perry made his way into the Bridal Suite. “Is it a Star Sapphire thing?”
“Maybe.” Carol Ferris said as Zatanna just shook her head.
“It’s definitely a witch thing.” The magician began to explain. “But they’ve done something that is way beyond what the average magic user is capable of.” She paused for a moment to consider just what the couple had already accomplished. “You know, aside from all the other impossible magic stuff they’ve done that literally no one else can do.”
“Oh it’s not that difficult.” Harley announced as she and Ivy walked arm in arm back to one of the chairs around the room. “First you have to find the one girl in all the world that you are meant to be with for all eternity.”
“Just for starters.” Ivy chimed in with a playful smirk.
“Then you have to practice traditional witchcraft with her for decades on end.” Harley went on. “Mostly spells with candles and floating roses in the air as you both telekinetically pluck their petals one by one. Of course naked dancing is a crucial step as well. You need to set aside time during at least three full moons a year and one or more moonless weekend nights to go out into the wilderness and dance naked as a couple around a giant bonfire.”
“Are they making this up?” Lucy asked Zatanna with a mildly disturbed frown on her face.
“Nope.” Zatanna replied with a knowing smirk. “Sounds pretty standard so far.”
“There’s other stuff but the final step is to bind your souls together in a mystical ritual that defies all the laws of both man and god.” Harley went on as if she was explaining commonly known details about mundane occurrences. “Once all that is done you can really get to work on undermining the fabric of society by promoting the homosexual agenda and forcing all citizens into mandatory gay marriages. Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha!” She finished with overly clichéd maniacal laughter. Only a handful of those present got the joke.
A few of the women around the room froze as they stared at the babbling blonde in complete shock. Fortunately, some recognized the outlandish statements and cartoonish villainous cackles for what they were and burst into laughter of their own.
“That took a turn.” Lucy said as she watched Cat Grant practically double over while cackling. “You okay Cat?”
“Oh, god Lane.” Cat asked in between gasps once she was able to stop laughing. “Where have you been hiding these two?”
“Sadly they keep to themselves far too much. Otherwise I’d hire them to work the room at all the parties I hate attending.” Lois said as she stood up from the seat where Cat and Lucy had kept her prisoner for the past few hours. “Perry, thank you for coming out today.” She greeted her boss with a warm smile.
“It’s my pleasure Lois.” Perry said as he walked up to the bride and gave her a quick hug. “You look amazing.”
The bride smiled as she stood there in her sleek white dress. Her shoulders and arms were bare as the dress stopped a few inches below her collar bone but well above her bust line. As the dress trailed down her body it accentuated her curves until it expanded outward half way down her thighs. Her hair was up in a bun that gave way to torrents of tight curls that matched the dark brunette strands framing her face.
“Thanks boss.” Lois said with an almost bashful grin.
Perry smiled at the bride once more before looking over her shoulder to the familiar woman who had toiled over her hair and makeup. “And it’s good to see you too Cat.” He said with a nod and a slight smirk.
“Perry.” Cat greeted the man with a restrained smile and a curt nod. The mild response was well practiced between the two media titans. Cat had spent the early years of her career working for Perry alongside Lois. The fact that her media empire now matched, if not outright eclipsed, his own was actually a point of pride for the chief editor.
“I think the boys are ready.” Diana said as Bruce and Jimmy appeared in the open doorway.
“Oh by the way Diana, you won the pot.” Harley added just as the Amazonian Princess was about to leave the room.
“Ha!” Diana shouted in triumph. “Victory has never tasted sweeter!” She laughed in the faces of each of the other founding members waiting in the hall. Each man had the good sense to avert his gaze.
“That’s our cue.” Cat said as she put on a bright smile and patted Lois on the back. “I’ve done all I can with what little you’ve given me to work with Lane. Try not to embarrass yourself before you actually seal the deal with your farm boy.”
“Love you too bitch.” Lois replied with a matching smile of her own. Though the back and forth left some of those present wondering about the need to separate both women it was clear to Ivy and Harley that the odd friendship was built on a strong foundation of scathing back and forth banter.
“Come along Other Lane.” Cat ordered Lucy in a self assured tone. “I believe you and I are at the front of this train wreck.”
With that the Maid of Honor and the Bride’s sister waltzed out of the room. They were soon followed by Carol and Dinah who had returned just before Harley and Perry came back. Selina and Barbara shot Lois a pair of encouraging smiles before heading out the door so Barbara could check in with the others working security, and Selina and Bruce could line up the other Bridesmaids and groomsmen that would march down the aisle before the Bride made an appearance.
One of the last five people in the Bridal Suite shared a warm smile with the bride. “You will do wonderfully out there Lois.” Diana said as she walked up to the bride once more. “Though I’d never partake in such a relationship I can more than see the appeal in a man such as Clark. Be proud of the love you have found, but never forget one important thing.”
“What’s that Diana?” Lois asked in an almost awed tone.
“Your place as a woman is to, as your people would say, call the shots in the relationship.” The Princess of Themyscira said with a conspiratorial wink to the stunned bride. A beat passed as Lois stared back at the strange woman before bursting into laughter yet again.
“I’ll remember that Princess.” Lois assured her with a proud grin. “I’ve been doing that with Smallville since day one I might as well keep it up.”
“I am proud to hear that.” Diana said before bowing her head slightly and turning to leave the room.
“Come on Ms. Thang.” Harley said as she and Ivy faced Lois and Perry one last time. “Let’s get you hitched.”
“I can’t wait.” Lois said in a quiet voice that did little to hide the ear to ear smile spread out across her face. With that the Bride and the Chief reporter followed the last of the bridesmaids out of the room. The music picked up as the groom and best man made their appearance in the nearby wedding hall. Two by two bridesmaids and groomsmen marched out of the entrance hallway of the wedding hall and down the aisle until the Bride and the man giving her away stood just outside the wedding hall. Through it all nothing dampened the all consuming happiness that filled Lois’ heart.