by Katharyn » Tue Apr 23, 2013 10:33 pm
Title: Tara and Willow – Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda – Chapter Seventy-Four-B
Author: Katharyn Rosser
Feedback: Absolutely, yes please. That’s why I write for this place, to engage in the discussion about the story.
Spoiler warning: Not sure why I am bothering, really, but Season 4 and Season 5 of BTVS.
Distribution: This story was written for Pens. Pens is its home. No archiving off Different Coloured Pens and the Kitten Board please. No conversion to eBook or other formats please. Enjoy it here.
Summary: The very beginning of a different version of ‘Buffy vs. Dracula.’ But set after the previous chapter’s volleyball game. It’s the same day on the beach.
Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the copyrights or anything else associated with BTVS. All rights lie with the production company, writers etc. I am making no money from this series of stories however all original characters and situations remain my property. As this is a missing scenes and alternate reality fiction lots of scenes are new versions of those seen in the show, as such dialogue and situations are taken from the show. I’m sure you can tell which. All credit for those aspects goes to the original writers.
Rating: Occasional, tasteful, adult situations and contextual bad language. However by and large equivalent to the show.
Couples: Tara and Willow forever, that’s all I’m bothered about.
Text convention: Use of italics denotes either special emphasis if used for a single or a few words in a sentence OR first person thoughts if used for a whole sentence.
Notes: The notes below were largely written before I decided to add the volleyball game into this day on the beach so this - 74B - was originally the very start of S5 proper and the BvsD episode. Sorry for the broken nature of them!! Think of it like time-travel. Oooh! Story idea!
I am back to redrafting after an extended period for NaNoWriMo and due to the end of S4 natural break. Feels like coming home, but also feels like ‘there’s still all that to do?’
So here we go, we’re into Season 5 proper. Some of the reason behind the summer parts was trying to establish who was where and when over summer as – in canon - we don’t see Tara and Willow moving into dorms until ‘The Real Me’ so I count ‘Buffy versus Dracula’ as the very tail end of summer. The episode showed us a little of that and there were nice moments, so I’ve left them – in a new version – here… We’ll get into the Dracula stuff as we go on deeper into the episode.
One consequence of the new way in which I’m approaching these episodes, may be that we’re somewhat longer going through the new versions of the episode events, and other episodes skipped almost entirely. Not sure how this is going to go yet… but everything’s still from the girl’s point of view (except for one section coming up not too far in the future for a very necessary reasons (those who remember the show may be able to guess why, who and how that is presented!)
There’s a little repetition of the description from the prior part as they were written months apart, but there’s no harm in that so I’ve left it there.
Thanks to: My Nanowrimo collaborator for giving me a much needed break Nose to the grindstone again.
“The tank’s a good call,” Willow leaned over and said conspiratorially, “a very good call. I mean, I was pretty sure things couldn’t get better than that striped bikini – Have you ever noticed how the stripes, running the right way, really bring out curves and when we were playing volleyball you were all… you were getting jiggy with it and then when you went swimming the water was all cold and you were – what was I saying?”
“Tank top?”
“Oh, but that’s even better. When it was clinging to the bikini, when it was wet…” Willow sighed.
Tara shook her head and laughed. Calling this a tank top was stretching the truth so far that it was practically broken. It was just a top that was a little more substantial in the strap department than, say, Buffy’s. That Willow liked to characterise that as a ‘tank top’ said much more about her reading and research (not to mention her fantasies) than it did the top itself.
Willow loved her as she was, that was abundantly clear, but really wouldn’t have minded if she got a little butch. Just for an evening. Or a whole night.
“I love your tee,” was all she said as she replied.
Willow shook her head and then straightened her oversize hat. “I look like a ginger girl hiding from the sun. Because… guess what!?”
“Doesn’t mean that I don’t like it,” Tara said, seeking a kiss.
“Hey, hey! We agreed. No sloppy stuff,” Buffy called. Since this had practically turned into a couple’s day out then the rule might seem a little out of place. She and Willow, Buffy and Eddie – similarly wary of the sun but for different reasons – and Xander and Anya.
Of course the ‘rule’ was really aimed at Faith, who hadn’t come out here with anyone, though Willow had tried to set her up with someone. Namely, in this case, a girl.
Why? She’d ask that later, but… Willow didn’t do much without a plan.
In addition to not coming with anyone, Faith hadn’t brought much to wear either. Once she’d stripped off the belted, oversize tee and revealed her swimsuit that’d been all she needed.
Now they were sitting around, it kind of made her glad she’d covered up a little after the game. Her bikini was much more modest – though it had distracted Willow - but… there was no competing with Faith. No one else was even trying. Not anymore. Even Anya - who regularly scowled at all the male attention the Slayer was getting and wasn’t being mollified by the fact that she had a man of her own – had pretty much given up.
Of course, her man wasn’t as buff, muscled, twelve-pack abs-worthy as the ones Faith was attracting. And – despite the amount of time she’d spent with Paige earlier – the Slayer was still lapping it up, just off a little way on her own from their group. Within calling distance, but far enough apart that they didn’t have to be introduced to anyone Faith actually picked up.
“Just a peck then,” Willow said and gave her what she’d been seeking.
“I thought there were rules,” Anya complained.
“There are rules,” Buffy replied. “No public displays of affection. No talking shop and no talking about what happens in the bedroom.”
All of those rules were aimed at different people. The PDA was intended for Faith more than anyone because she defined ‘affection’ differently. The bedroom talk for Anya and the shop talk was just a general thing, to avoid the tension they’d left behind in the summer. Oh, and there was a rider on the ‘bedroom’ definition to include whatever other places Anya and Xander – or Faith – had been indulging themselves.
Since the end of the game of beach volleyball that had initially attracted so much attention to Faith – who’d pretty much insisted on authentic uniforms since that was all she had – nothing else had really involved Faith at all.
It was, largely, Faith’s choice. Okay, Buffy hadn’t enjoyed losing to her – again – and maybe giving them a chance to be competitive hadn’t, in hindsight, been the best idea, but things were relaxed. Just… Faith wasn’t quite with them. Even if she wasn’t quite apart from them either.
Buffy and Faith were getting along much better; the game hadn’t really set that back in any lasting way. Willow thought dodge ball was bad? But volleyball at full Slayer power was… dangerous. She was surprised they’d all come through it without scars or blood being shed.
Including the spectators.
Some choice – very loud - remarks by Anya about the likelihood of the Buffy/Faith rivalry all being due to repressed sexual tension between the two hadn’t helped anyone. The former-demon was doing too much reading but an explosion of sand as the ball had smacked into the beach in front of her had left her spluttering, wiping sand off her newly sub-blocked skin and Buffy glaring at her.
Faith had seemed more amused by Anya’s conclusions, but that had been the end of the competitive events. Not even Xander had dared to back his girlfriend up, perhaps because – like her and Willow – he didn’t believe it for a moment.
“I’m adding another one,” Buffy said. “No talking about me and Faith because that is so not happening. Look, she was hitting on that girl – Paige – earlier. Nothing to do with me!”
Buffy needn’t have worried, Willow was pretty sure that if Faith wanted anything like that, there was only that one girl she was going to. Paige… Strangely, she didn’t actually see the need for every girl in the world (or even just all their friends) to be into girls but… Maybe they would be a good match. Paige hadn’t seemed like she’d take any S.H.I.T from anyone, and Faith always needed people like that around her.
People who’d put up with her. Of course, she needed people who’d get horizontal with her too.
“I don’t know,” Xander said, speaking before he’d engaged his brain as he was often caught out doing. “I think it’d be hot, am I right Eddie? Eddie? Right? Back me up here, man?”
Wisely Eddie said nothing and everyone was avoiding Xander’s eyes.
“Can you imagine the… cat…fight.” Xander paused, seeing Buffy’s glare. “So… yes, a new rule has been called for vote. All in favour say ‘Aye’ Aye!”
“They say being overly defensive is a sure sign of denial,” Anya commented, somehow thinking she was sticking up for her man as well as her own opinions.
“I’ve never denied anything,” Willow said, kissing her one more time.
“But you’d already admitted it to yourself by the time anyone else knew - ”
“Aye!” The chorus went around the circle before Anya could take things any further.
“Look at her,” Buffy said, looking over at Faith and her bevvy of male admirers. “What’s she got that I don’t? Girls and guys… I didn’t mean that the way it sounded, guys – a guy. This guy, that’s all I need.”
“She’s got availability?” Tara tried. “You’re happy and unavailable.” It felt like she should be asking a question there, but it’d be impolitic for sure.
“There’s also a certain degree of hotness,” Xander added, “not that anyone here’s lacking that quality, but when you put it together with the FHM swimsuit shoot hair and – well – the bikini? Yeah… I’m really shutting up now.”
“You should, unless you’re asking for abstinence for your birthday,” Anya told him. She hadn’t thought about that at all.
He mimed a zipper across his mouth. Not a peep would be heard. Though the look Willow gave her suggested she didn’t believe Anya could manage that for any prolonged period anyway.
“You know?” Willow asked. “I actually thought she’d be more… European.”
“Hairy?” Buffy asked, glancing over to where Faith was adjusting her hair flirtatiously, giving a chance to see her pits.
“No! Sheesh, I meant free spirited. You know… European.”
“I’m pretty sure,” Anya said. “That if you want to see her boobs, you only have to ask. She doesn’t obey the law unless it’s convenient.”
Willow shook her head. Tara knew she had her own feelings about both American prudishness but also about an over-abundance of boobs. “I’ve got all the boobs I need, thank you. Recent evidence suggests that every girl should have four. Hers and her girlfriend’s.” Once again they broke the rules with a peck.
“It's confidence,” she said quietly to try and get them away from Faith’s chest. And so everyone looked at her so she wished she hadn’t. “Umm – it’s not – well, it’s not a lesbian thing. Not much anyway – I mean, I just think, well, I recognise what I don’t have a lot of…”
“You had enough confidence to ask me out,” Willow said. “While we were being attacked by the Gentlemen. Without words, you did it without words so – yeah, eat it. I mean – not that you said that, just… damn it… when will this stop happening to me?”
“Confidence,” Xander gallantly came to Willow’s rescue with half an eye on the threat of abstinence. “It’s true, that’s a big – underrated – thing.”
“Xander also has a big, underrated thing,” Anya said, not wanting to be left out. She was beaming too. “Well, underrated anyway. When a girl’s gone troll - ”
“New rule - ” Willow started.
“Carried,” everyone else chorused.
“I thought the rules were all aimed at Faith?” Anya asked, scowling.
“Guess not,” Buffy replied.
“So it’s confidence,” Willow asked, trying to change the subject.
“I’m guessing, I’ve never been that confident though,” Tara said.
“Do you think that confidence is directly correlated with teenyness of swimsuits?” Buffy asked.
“There may be a correlation,” she agreed. You had to be confident to get away with that and not just look desperate and slutty. And that was the remarkable thing, despite the insults they through around. It wasn’t slutty or pornographic. Just… barely there. Somehow.
“It’s really not that tiny,” Xander said. “It’s just… well cut. Not that I’ve been looking.”
“I’m surprised you can even see her,” Willow told him.
Buffy nodded. “It was like the tide going out when she went into the ocean, all the guys followed her down to the water’s edge.”
“Ah, yes. No doubt they were anticipating the effects of cold water,” Xander said. “Oh – God, please just shoot me and kill me. I keep walking into this…”
“Keep going, you won’t need to call on your God,” Anya said so sweetly there was a definite threat that went beyond her previous one.
“So, it’s great that we’re all here,” Tara said, hoping she was doing a better job of changing the subject this time around.
Willow backed her up. “We’re all having a good time right?”
“Some of us better than others,” Buffy said archly, looking at Faith one more time. “Yeah… I shouldn’t bitch. She just makes it so damned easy. Which is appropriate, being as she is - ”
“I’m having fun,” Anya said.
“Really?” Xander asked.
“Every time you open your mouth I am getting to think of many unusual punishments,” Anya volunteered brightly and not helping Xander’s mood. “I’ve not had to do that for a while, I think I’ve been missing the vengeance.”
“So… everyone’s happy,” Tara said. “Come on… it’s been a good day.”
“I’m with you, Tara,” Eddie said, speaking up for the first time in a while. His nerves around the rest of them – when they were being so tight-knit and having these sorts of conversations - reminded her of how she'd have been a few months back. “Today’s been… cool. It was great to spend time with you all.”
She grinned with pleasure at his accordance. It was too easy for them to focus on what was bothering them now, but they’d already had a lot of fun so far, just hanging out had been nice and Faith had occupied them only since the unfortunate grudge volleyball match. Up to that point… good times had been rolling.
It was his very genuine enthusiasm – and perhaps that he didn’t speak up that often – which seemed to make Buffy relent and where Buffy led, the others were inclined to follow. “Mister Ed’s right,” Xander said. “No one can say this isn’t good times. Good weather, sand, ocean without those damned jellies that swarmed me last time we came down here. Good food too – more to come. I’m looking forwards to the barbecue because who doesn’t love barbecue?”
“Why do they call you Mister Ed? Anya asked Eddie. “Is it because you’re hung like a - ”
“No! Rules, people! We have rules!,” Buffy said. “Please. I mean… seriously. Just… no.”
Anya mouthed ‘speedo’ to them when Buffy wasn’t looking. Honestly she hadn’t looked when Eddie had been wearing one earlier. Before he was gently reminded that he should put his shorts on again. It was so far down her list of things to look at. Besides, she’d been slathering Willow in sun block.
“You having fun, Willow?” Xander asked.
Taking her hand, she was well aware that Willow wasn’t about to say ‘no.’
“Good company,” Willow added to the pile, squeezing her fingers and rubbing her palm.
“So say the sidekicks,” Tara teased.
“What do you mean?” Xander asked, totally unexpected. She’d been hoping to unite the rest of them in cheering Buffy up and instead she was being questioned?
“Well, we’re all kind of… sidekicks. I mean, I know that – that if I kicked anything it’d be all sidey and things. That’s why I don’t think we kick much – we’re sidekicks. Slayers need sidekicks. Right?”
“I know this one does,” Buffy said.
“See, but you’re the one here who’s not a sidekick, baby,” Willow told her.
“Me?” A flutter of panic went through her. She felt like she was being separated from the herd. She didn’t want to be the one who stood out from this group of friends. Not really. There was a reason the herd herded. Safety in numbers and all that?
“Willow’s right, Tara. You’re the essential one,” Xander said, nodding at the suggestion. “Buffy’s a well-adjusted – kind of – young woman. We hang out with her because she makes us look better than we would and a little of her cool comes our way. But you… Nah.”
“I don’t get her cool?” It’d be nice to get someone’s cool.
“You don’t need her cool,” Xander corrected. “Not that way.”
So… I’m cool enough? No, that didn’t feel right. What were they saying?
“He’s right,” Anya said and Willow nodded too. What was it that they all – apparently – knew and she didn’t?
“Got to admit it,” Buffy said, shaking her head. “You’re just not sidekick material, Tara.”
“Don’t worry, sweetie. It’s a good thing! If it wasn’t for you, Faith wouldn’t be helping and she wouldn’t be under control either,” Willow pointed out.
“If you call that control,” Buffy complained, glancing back at Faith who was getting sun screen rubbed into her bare back by one of the guys. “But it’s a point, Tara. I wouldn’t care if she wasn’t helping just so long as she’s not part of the problem. That’s all you. You’re like a Giles for the new generation.”
“No - ” she started to say.
“With a vagina,” Anya added helpfully.
Willow, who Tara had been looking at, silently pleading for help, went all big eyed. Apparently her vagina was something no one else was supposed to be talking about. And that was very cool with her. She could absolutely live with silence on that topic apart from Willow and, one day, a gynaecologist. No one else needed to mention it.
“It was a comment, Willow, not an invitation to fantasise - ” Anya started.
“Anya!”
“What? Aren’t I allowed to say anything now?”
“Can’t you say anything… I don’t know, more appropriate?” her boyfriend asked. “I love you but – we talked about this, remember?”
“You talked, but I’m not allowed to,” Anya bit back and Tara had to wonder about why it was that it was only since they’d started talking about having a good day that things started to go wrong with it. “Remember what I said about what goes into my mouth?”
“Okay! That’s enough of that one - ” Willow said, cutting off anything further.
“You can say anything you want,” Tara reassured her, before anyone took their bat home and just refused to engage with the rest of them.
“Really?” Anya asked hopefully.
“Sure,” she agreed while Willow made frantic ‘no’ gestures. But she wasn’t afraid of anything Anya might say. Embarrassed, sure. But not actually afraid of it.
She had much better things to be afraid of.
“I know you’ll… try to be sensitive to what people want to hear,” she finished, hoping that would work better. Nothing more, please, about Anya’s conditions for giving oral – Just nothing more on that. And maybe she did get it? Because she didn’t try to finish the thought that Willow had interrupted.
“Thank you, Tara. And that’s why I’m right about you. You know what to say, you pull people together. You listen to me, too. Without telling me off. And you have a vagina, I stand by that point.”
“Umm… thanks?”
“You’re welcome.”
“I’m sure Willow likes your vagina a lot.”
She whimpered as jaws dropped. Even for Anya… yeah.
“I’m about ready to start the barbecue,” Willow said, determined to change the subject herself this time.
Tara shook her head. “Not unless you’re doing it with a proper taper you’re not.”
“Aww.”
“You’re not doing magic, not when you’re all… het up.”
“She’s het up thinking about Tara’s - ” Anya started confiding to Eddie, as if he needed it explaining. Maybe she wasn’t quite so under control…
“Uh, thanks,” he managed to stop her.
“You’re welcome too. But I don’t know why everyone has a problem with the word ‘vagina’? Especially the lesbians, they must be more in touch with their vaginas, and each other’s, than almost anyone else?”
Okay, it was plain that setting rules had ceased working and – actually – Anya had kind of a point. One that everyone wished she didn’t have, but a point all the same. They were a group of five girls and yes, if conversation turned to – well, they should be able to use the word freely. Why not?
“But here’s the thing, honey,” Xander said. “There are things that you just don’t expect to say at a day on the beach.”
“Why?”
“You… just don’t. It’s a people thing,” Buffy said.
“And… now that you’re a real, beautiful person,” Xander said and making her beam at the compliment, “you need to fit in with the people things.”
Tara nodded, smiling. Her boyfriend had found the right lever. Maybe. She'd thought she had too though. Fail.
“I think I understand. So is Willow not going to light the barbecue anymore?”
“I’ve been waiting,” Willow moaned.
“And you’ve been practicing.”
“I’m pretty sure that that any Giles, female or not, would suggest using the proper tools for the job right now.” Xander was backing away from the kit that they’d picked up from the store.
“Have a little faith, will ya?” Willow said.
“Me, I’m having as little faith as possible,” Buffy said under her breath but everyone but the girl herself must’ve caught it. Faith was otherwise occupied. Or just didn’t care, flirting now with a different guy who’d done her back.
“Willow’s g-got this,” Tara said, confident that her girl would make her proud. She wanted to be the supportive girlfriend. She did. But… safety first. “But… just in case, you might want to get a little further away from it.”
“Further? Really?”
“Singed eyebrows are never pretty,” Willow said, turning her focus to the barbecue and – wisely – everyone did what she said and backed off a little further.
“Faith!” Tara called. The other Slayer was down to just the one guy now, which bode well for his chances, she supposed. “Fire in the hole!”
When she looked back to the group, they were all looking at her with some sense of wonder. Even Willow. “I… My Dad was a m-marine. He always used to say that when something was being let off, like a fire cracker, but I’ve never had the chance to say… Never mind.”
“‘Fire in the hole’, it sounds like really hot Thai - ” Xander broke off and let out a high pitched yelp as Willow ignited the barbecue with a rush of flames. They quickly died back but… damn. Caution had definitely been merited.
“Don’t do that!” Xander finished. “Not without warning people, by which I mean me.”
“It’s what ‘fire in the hole’ means,” Willow pointed out.
“Right… That.”
“I just didn’t think there’d be so much ‘boom’, you should be a registered lethal weapon, Will.”
“Just sticking up for the sidekicks,” Willow said. “Now, which of you men is going to stand over it and cook our burgers to perfection.”
“I’m having sausage,” Anya said.
“Of course you are…”
Anya looked over to where Faith was actually smiling. She only did that for guys she was seriously considering giving a chance to and might’ve been put off by her more natural sneer.
“I think maybe Faith is too.”
----------------------
“So it went ‘boom’!” Willow said. Okay, so she was proud of that. And why not? It was another of the practical applications of magic. Number three – lighting the barbecue. And it was an all-weather solution too. Even if she hadn’t – exactly – meant it.
Not that you’d be having a barbecue on the beach on the rain but, totally unaffected.
Giles didn’t seem to be quite as impressed as she wanted him to be. In fact he seemed quite distracted.
“Sounds very… flamey,” he said absently as he turned the page in the book he was meticulously scanning while she worked on the metadata to build into their search capability. Extra-indexy.
“You should’ve been there,” Willow said. “Everyone agreed that the meat was extra-tasty too. Though now I think about it, some people might’ve meant something different. But maybe the magic gave it an extra… something.”
“Actually, I’ve had a very productive day,” he said. “I’ve made considerable progress.”
“So I see,” Willow said. She was having to skimp on the time she’d ordinarily have spent browsing some of Giles’ most dangerous books in order to catch up with his scanning. Yes, she’d blown it off to go to the beach with her Tara and their friends. About all she had time for now was to ask him for his thoughts on additional search terms. “Gray’s Demonic Anatomy?” she said, showing him the cover.
“Exactly what it sounds like, really,” Giles said. “One of the first comprehensive examinations of the anatomies of a number of demon species, with some rather wilder speculation as to the sources of their powers thrown in.
“Madame Gray - note the Americanised spelling - had an unfortunate tendency to add rather too much significance to genitalia, or what she assumed was genitalia, but despite that her work was ground-breaking in that’s she took things further and – with her husband who’d studied in China – found some uses for demonic body parts you wouldn’t have expected. It actually established a rather grizzly market and offered significant power to those who could secure them and… Well, it usually involved grinding the parts up.”
Fortunately for her sanity, her focus had been lost at ‘genitalia’ simply coded it under ‘demon –anatomy – parts.’
“So why the sudden rush to move into the twentieth century?” she asked.
“First of all, I noticed what you did there,” he said. “I’m well aware that we’re now in the twenty-first century. If your recall I was with you at the millennium.”
Yes, he had been… Shivering on top of the tomb of Heinrich Korgamom who prophesied his own return at just that time. A man who’d been reputed to have enough power to make it happen but ultimately… hadn’t. Which was unfortunate if you were him and wanted to wreak havoc as the world entered a new – arbitrarily designated – millennium but quite lucky for everyone else.
Unless you’d wanted to celebrate that millennium’s arrival. Such was the life of a sidekick.
“But why the move?” she pressed.
Giles hesitated for longer than he usually would just to consider his response, but then pushed ahead and gave his answer. It wasn’t something you saw every day, not that he rushed into his words, but that flicker of doubt about whether he would tell you or not. That was… worrying.
“You’ve put that quite well,” he said. “I’m actually planning on making a move.”
“A move? To new digs? Because as a representative of the team, I have to say that we all think this place is great, home from home really. Central and - ”
“A move back to England, Willow.”
She stopped, thinking through the ramifications of that. Nearly speaking up a couple of times, but then not. But she had to say something. “I want to ask if you just mean for a visit, a cup of tea and a cucumber sandwich, but you don’t. Do you? You planning to take your books, you’re planning to take everything.”
“Everything,” he agreed. “But I didn’t want to leave you all without the benefits of the library so I… conquered my fears of these infernal machines and here we are.”
Now she wanted to argue, wanted to beg him to stay but… he seemed resigned to it. Not firm, not angry, nor disappointed. And she thought that, maybe, she understood. He wasn’t sure of his place here anymore. That was something they’d all wondered about. More than once. His Slayer was her own woman, all grown up and his employers had forsaken him (that was what the paperwork said ‘forsaken’) and there was Faith.
Faith, who also had Tara. Kind of.
She didn’t want him to go, that was the obvious thing. But… he knew that. “I think Jenny would be proud of you,” she said. It seemed like a good compromise, and true too. In more ways than one, they both understood that. Sometimes, sometimes what would’ve happened if Miss Calendar had… survived?
Sometimes she wondered whether Miss Calendar had been her first girl crush too. Tara thought ‘maybe’. Just an innocent one.
“I didn’t think Principal Snyder would mind if I used the software from the old library,” Giles said, moving the conversation from what would be uncomfortable ground.
“What with the being dead and all, I’d guess not. Do you want me to ask you why?” She thought it was better to check. Even though she kind of knew.
“You will eventually, but you can’t say anything to Buffy and the others. It – I need to make sure that you all have everything you need. I need to break it to them in the right way.”
“You want me to keep it a secret?” she asked, an edge of panic fluttering through her.
“I know you’ll find it difficult, Willow, but for now. Yes, I’d rather you did.”
“Okay,” she said, trying to sound confident. “You think we don’t need you, don’t you?” She’d been willing to – well, enquiring minds. She had a very enquiring mind. Like she was going to be sleep now she had a secret? She’d be asking herself the whole time so -
“Everything’s changed,” he sighed. “Even before Diana’s arrival and the change of circumstances that wrought, I was contemplating my future. Buffy doesn’t need a Watcher anymore.”
“We were just talking about this – well, not this, but this kind of thing. Buffy’s still alive, when most other Slayer’s wouldn’t be, because she had friends, because she had a good Watcher. She knows that too. She’s not going to be happy.”
“Yes, actually, she will be. She has gentleman friend - ”
“You mean Eddie?”
“Yes – one who isn’t likely to try to end the world. And her friends will still be here, last year’s shenanigans simply demonstrated that I don’t serve much of a purpose here anymore. She’s grown up and she has all of you – more of you in fact than ever before.”
Aha, better argument right there. “Faith! Faith needs a Watcher, if there was ever a girl who needed a good Watcher then its Faith. Whoever saddled her with Wesley was - ”
He shook his head, denying that. “They weren’t a good pairing, but Wesley was simply unlucky. I think perhaps that I’d have struggled with Faith too. Fortunately I had a readymade excuse for not doing so. Now Faith has Tara, you all do – though you most of all.”
“Tara?” After the conversation on the beach, the terrible phrase ‘Giles with a vagina’ entered her head and she swallowed, horrified that was now associated with her girlfriend… From close, personal experience (on one side) she could clearly state it was inaccurate.
“Tara wouldn’t – Tara would be horrified if you said that to her. You know, apart from the 'having me' part. Which she does – I mean, romantically and supportively not having having – well, not just having having but… Tara would be horrified.”
“Which is precisely why she’s a good choice, if she’s willing to continue to shoulder the burden? She’s not a Watcher, she’s not been trained and I’ll wager that she has no interest in being one either. And I truly believe that if Faith survives, if she’s going to survive, then Tara will be the key to that. She’ll leave that girl able to walk alone. Without ending the world.”
Actually, she couldn’t argue with that. Her girlfriend had another woman in her life. Faith Lehane. And Tara was about as likely to leave either of them as the other – which was to say it wasn’t going to happen.
“But when all is said and done - between you all - you have all the components necessary for success.”
“Name one!” she said. And I wasn’t planning to argue with him?.
“I’ll name several. Buffy’s an independent young woman now, as well as a Slayer, and I couldn’t be prouder of her for that. Both she and Faith will occasionally need advice, a level head and that’s where Tara is already stepping up to the wicket. She’s doing that for Faith and Buffy gets on well with her too. She bridges the schism between them rather neatly.”
“Research?” Willow challenged, then remembered what she was doing. “Oh.”
“Exactly and for the more esoteric knowledge, there’s always Ethan. I trust him about as far as I can throw him, but he does seem loyal enough to Diana and to be following Tara’s lead – for now. Everyone else has suffered in his dedication to his God… now he’s met her and I think there’s a level of trust that you can have in him, so long as you remember there are limits to that.”
“Limits, check. Tara… check.”
“And then there’s Diana herself. No one can be quiet certain of her, or her motivation, but it’s plain that this Darkness she’s warned us about is - ”
“Aha!” Willow interrupted. “Yes, the Darkness. Glorificus. What about that?” They needed him for that, right?
“She’s a Goddess, Willow. Immortal. Her timeframes are not ours. We could all spend our lives waiting for that to come around and never find ourselves confronted with it.”
“Or,” she suggested, “it might happen next week. What? It could happen that way, and you can’t deny it.”
“Everything I’ve said still stands, and the leadership of Diana, Goddess of the Hunt, will surely surpass anything I can add to it. I don’t trust her, not entirely, but that’s because I don’t understand her, I don’t think any of us can.”
“I think Tara feels the same way,” Willow said.
“Which just goes to show that she’s an excellent choice to step into that role of coordinating your efforts. Making sure that the two Slayers work together. And the rest of you, I’m sure, won’t abandon her to that.”
“No… but you’re going to at least ask her right?”
“There’s no need,” Giles said. “She’s already doing it. It’s not a job, not something you sign up to. I was always told that a good Watcher was one who represented discipline and control, continuity of ancient trusts and regimes. That’s twaddle. What makes Buffy a success is – I’m certain – friendship and a level head. Both things I’m proud to have given her.”
“She’ll still be horrified you’re saying she can do that. She won’t think she can.”
“I dislike modesty as a trait,” Giles said. “Which is fortunate in this country of yours. But I much prefer someone who doesn’t understand how valuable they are. That’s Tara, I’m quite convinced of it. And – after all – there are phones, electronic mails and aeroplanes. To paraphrase Buffy – something I never thought I’d do – if the world ends, you can still beep me.”
She smiled, that was certainly true enough. He could be here in a day and most of what he offered – at least in supernatural terms – was knowledge he could provide from anywhere.
He paused, thought for a moment. “Do you really think Jenny would be proud?”
“I think Miss Calendar would be the first to tell you that you were doing the right thing,” Willow said. And that made her even sadder.
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If I wanted a little pussy, I've got my own to play with.
Chance in *Chance*
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