Finish this sentence: "And one time, at band camp, I stuck my flute up my..." Most movie fans have no trouble recalling the last word of the infamous line uttered by actress Alyson Hannigan, a.k.a. Band Camp Girl, near the end of American Pie. A demure demoiselle full of boring band-camp stories for most of the underdog hit movie, Alyson transformed into a dirty-talking sexpot by the film's denouement. Band camp memberships soared across the country. Throngs of women lined up outside flute stores.
OK, maybe that didn't happen, but Alyson unchained the inner dominatrix in her squeaky clean girl-next-door image. She went on to explore her sapphic side on the vamps vs. vampires series Buffy the Vampire Slayer, when her character Willow got a lesbian makeover -- fueling the threesome fantasies of goth boys everywhere. And when American Pie 2 hits movie theaters across America on August 10, Alyson reprises her role as a band-camp instructor with the soul of a porn star.
"There's the sweet little ol' 'she's playing with the band' side," says Alyson, 27, of Band Camp Girl. "And then there's the no-holds-barred sex side. She's definitely not shy when it comes to bedroom issues."
And neither is Alyson, as we learned when we posed a dozen unashamedly prying sex questions. From the difficulty of performing oral on a "large" man to the aphrodisiac qualities of a tan to the joy of plotless porn, this racy redhead's uninhibited answers could heat a vampire's blood.
1. In American Pie, Stifler's mom seduces a guy on the pool table. Where's the wildest place you've ever had sex?
Alyson Hannigan: Well, I've done the pool table thing. But I'd say probably the wildest would be...oh, man...I guess, while driving. That was good. And it was a stick shift so it was kind of difficult. We had to maneuver. We were actually driving. We had to figure it out: One steers, one does the stick shift and the gas pedal. And one ex-boyfriend and I -- you know those sky buckets at the amusement park? Well, it wasn't hot and heavy sex, but it was like, OK, well, just so we could say we did it. It wasn't like real sex, it was more like, "OK, c'mon. Quick." I've heard that some airlines are going to start putting cabins in some planes for long flights to London and Australia. I was like, Look at that, the mile high club is gonna get a lot of new memberships.
2. Will you push a guy around in bed?
AH: [Laughs] Well, I don't get any complaints. Guys don't mind being pushed. I definitely take control. I know what I like. Not that I'm this dominatrix or anything. But yeah, I'd say I'm the more...pushy...if you want to use that terminology.
3. Does size matter?
AH: It's not the most important thing. But if the guy's not so great, but he's well-endowed, then you put up with a little more than you would the normal, regular guy. It's like, "Oh...but...." But the long haul, no, that's definitely not what matters. To just be completely bold, it's really not very good for oral sex. Guys with big...it's just not so good. I mean, yeah. I'm sure prostitutes are fine, [because] they've got better neck muscles.
4. Finally, an upside for guys with a small penis. So, do you prefer giving or receiving oral sex?
AH: Giving, actually. Not that I'm against...you know. I just love...there's nothing better than seeing my boyfriend at such a nice pleasured moment. Aaaaah. I'm so bright red right now. I just hope my mom doesn't read this. I love pleasuring him, I love to make him feel good. And that just turns me on.
5. Have you ever had a one-night stand?
AH: No, I haven't. I don't think I'm a one-night-stand type of person. I just gross myself out in my head, like, "OK, where's this been?" I'm just more comfortable with people that I love, or at least am pretty fond of. There is the whole, "Ooh it's a stranger," kinda thing. But all my friends who have done it are like, "Oh, it's not as satisfying," and afterwards, it's kind of awkward. And you're like, "OK, I don't even know this person." I've never had a friend who's a big fan who's like, "Hey, let's go have one-night stands! Woo!"
6. What's your favorite part of your body?
Click the audio link at left to hear Alyson's answer.
7. Are you into sex toys or getting adventurous in bed?
AH: Sure. I mean, as long as it's not like an animal, or something. [Laughs] There's not much that would offend me. If my boyfriend said, "Hey, honey, let's try this," I'd definitely try it. Although the mnage--trois thing I wouldn't be able to do with my boyfriend. Because I just love him so much that I think it would be too screwy. The whole jealousy thing just wouldn't work. I just couldn't see him doin' some other chick. That wouldn't work out. I can understand if it's somebody you're seeing and you're just, "Uh, whatever, it's fun for now." I totally understand it then. But not if it's somebody you truly, deeply love. I just couldn't do that.
I once looked into seeing how to make a chain-link-fence headboard for my bed. I thought, That'd be really cool to have. But it seemed like a real bitch to actually get made. I was talking to the construction guys at work and they're like, "Well, you know, it's gonna bounce around a lot, and it's gonna be pretty noisy and squeaky. And it's not gonna be great." I was like, "All right. Never mind." But wouldn't that be fun to have a chain-link bed? You know where I came up with it? I was driving past a house that had a black chain-link fence. I was like, "That would make such a great bed." There's so many different places to tie people up. You can grab onto it, you could climb it...but it didn't happen. And now my tastes have changed, and aesthetically, it wouldn't be so pleasing.
8. Was your first time everything you thought it would be?
AH: Yeah, I don't regret my first time. I mean, it wasn't fireworks or anything, but I was glad it was with the guy it was with. I didn't know what the hell I was doing, but it was all right. With age, it obviously becomes much better. It hurt. [Laughs] But it was like a good pain. It's a lot easier for guys. You just stick it in.
9. On a recent Sex and the City, a guy spoils the mood in bed with baby talk. Are you turned on by talking dirty in bed?
AH: Yeah! I'm very open to anything. As long as it's not cheesy. But in the right mood, it's really not cheesy when it's happening. Just talking about it now, going, "I like it when he talks dirty to me," it sounds a lot cheesier than when it's happening. Yeah, it's nice. But the baby talk in bed would not be so nice. At that point, you'd just have to gag him. It's like, "Hey look, this is our new game." And stuff a sock in his mouth. I don't want him to rhyme. Like, cat in the hat's fine, but not during sex.
10. There's a porn knockoff of Buffy called Buffy the Vampire Layer. What's your view of porn?
AH: I like stuff like Seymour Butts. I love that. Obviously, there's the whole porn-cheesy element. But I like the fact that it seems like it's real. There's this one where they went to Europe, and the girl's on a train, and she's, like, masturbating. I just thought that was awesome. Because you see the people walking by, so obviously he just took his video camera and videotaped her. Don't give me a story, just give me the porn. I don't need a plot. And now that porn's on DVD, it's so much better. Just the clarity. You just pop in the little disc, and you can fast-forward to the good parts without having to wait for the VCR to wind. Although it is kind of fun to watch porn on fast-forward. Then it's like, "OK, I didn't like this couple, let's get the next couple."
11. Have you had an embarrassing sexual moment on the scale of the guy getting caught violating a pie in American Pie?
AH: Not to that degree! That would probably send me to the nunnery -- getting caught by your father fucking a pie. That's pretty humiliating. I got caught, but it was by a [boyfriend's] friend, so it was no big deal. His friend had just broken up with his girlfriend, so he was all depressed. And not really wanting to see other people having sex. But that wasn't super embarrassing. But nothing really embarrassing. Oh-oh! Wait, no, that wasn't me. I don't know why I thought that was me. I've hit heads with people, and it hurt. But I actually knew somebody who broke a guy's nose during sex. She was just a little too happy. I think it was her pelvic bone.
12. We're glad you've avoided serious injury during sex. Finally, do you consider yourself good in bed?
AH: Wow. Well, I don't get complaints. But it's pretty tacky to be like, "Yeah, I'm such a great lover." Yeah. [Laughs] I definitely have a good time, and he does, too. My boyfriend and I are fabulous together. We've got it down. We've just got that extra spark in our skin, it just matches up perfectly. Our skin touching is amazing.
..... and in a way typically Aly - totally open and frank - I just love that woman 
