The Kitten, the Witches and the Bad Wardrobe - Willow & Tara Forever

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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2002 8:34 pm 
*steps away from the whip o' grammar*
*chan(ges out of mistress outfit into(surprisingly) much more modest cheerleading uniform*
yah, jomarch! *cartwheels*

that was sooo sweet. Happy for x/a. Happy for what this implies for W/T. There's still that pesky prophecy, though. yargh!
As beta, I feel that i should have special way-ahead-of-everyone-else, not-nervous-about-prophecies priveledges. But then again, I kinda like it... funny, that.
Very well done, as always.
Gearing up for more beta goodness before I begin a long stint away from the computer tomorrow... yee hah!



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2002 8:48 pm 
Owl – Why do I feel the urge to bow before the whip o’grammer? I think I need more beer. Re-reading this story has me all silly. Hey, and have a wonderful time with your family; save some flourless chocolate cake for me!

BM- still working out her intricate choreography for the pleasure of jomarch

Blame the beer

[This message has been edited by Bobo's Mom (edited March 27, 2002).]



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2002 8:58 pm 
quote:
Originally posted by Bobo's Mom:
Owl ?Why do I feel the urge to bow before the whip o’grammer?
BM- still working out her intricate choreography for the pleasure of jomarch

Blame the beer

[This message has been edited by Bobo's Mom (edited March 27, 2002).]


HI BM, join the club. I too have bowed before the whip of grammar! And wow, intricate choreagraphy and Owl's Mistress outfit has given me all kinds of ideas. Too bad I've written Ch 7 and sent it off.
quote:



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2002 8:59 pm 
Glad that X-man and Anya hooked back up
-Will

------------------
"Hear that, baby? You're my always."



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2002 9:06 pm 
Jomarch - there's always future chapters to write that can feel the force of the whip! Perhaps an idea for the next story? Willow and Tara diagramming naughty sentences together. Hell. Willow and Tara could be doing anything together, and I would read about it. Who am I kidding?


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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2002 10:24 pm 
Just read through this in one so far and I have to say how impressed I am with the writing of it (you said it was your first fic?). I love where the story is going Jomarch and I look forward to reading the rest

------------------
Beep, beep



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2002 10:25 pm 
Great update Jomarch. Getting over my earlier reaction to seeing Willow hurt. I can see now that it may have been a blessing in disguise. Willow and Tara seem to be closer to each other (if thats possible). Great job...looking forward to the next part. Keep up the good work.


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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2002 11:22 pm 
jomarch, that was great!! Yay, X/A. Very sweet moment for them. And yes, I agree with Owl, I'm worried about that pesky prophecy. Owl, honey, you're lookin' all kinds of yummy in your mistress of punctuation outfit - I think it's the combination of the whip and the librarian glasses.

Edited to add: Woo hoo, I have sassy eggs!!! jomarch, in the spirit of smitten camaraderie, I'm so glad I can share them with you first! *Pixie does the dance of sassy joy, careful not to wake up her parents.*

[This message has been edited by Pixie (edited March 28, 2002).]



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2002 11:48 pm 
Wow, again I am amazed at the feedback so I really like to thank everyone. Have just come back from lunch so will skiv from work a bit and reply to feedback

*LeatherQueen* - Yes, and there is more than one type of big bad too.

*ForeverPiper* - I'll teach you my happy dance if you teach me yours . Glad you enjoyed this chapter.

*Drakkenfyre* - You're welcome. Always glad to be of service.

*Bobo's mom* - I am so sorry for insinuating that you would have done it with the panties. Carry on . yes, you are a great smitten.

*Owl* - As previuosly stated, will have unending appreciation for your beta'ing. I do bow before the whip and mistress outfit and the new plaid cheerleading skirt is all sexy too. Am glad you like the beta privileges. Please don't scream after reading Ch 7.

*wilntlover* - I'm glad you're glad.

*Bobo's mom* - Another fic,another fic!!! (said in Anya- like voice) I think I just want to finish this one.

*Puff* - Thanks so much and yes, this is the first time I've actually written a fic. To be honest, I only started reading them a few months ago and have beed sucked in ever since. Am proud to be minoin to a few writers on the board.

*wolflord* - I am glad you're not angry anymore. Yes, Willow and Tara will always love each other.

*Pixie* - Ohhhh, my what sassy egss you have. I am so glad you shared that with me. Nice sassy dance as well. Perhaps we should incorporate that into the smitten squad routine. I could write a cheer! And sweetie, sometimes the prophecy is not the only thing to be worried about.



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Thu Mar 28, 2002 12:56 pm 

Have just finished betaing chapter seven.

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHH!



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Thu Mar 28, 2002 1:17 pm 
Hey Jomarch! Here I had promised myself not to start any new fics, y'know? Because between keeping up with the two or so that I've already been reading, and getting any writing done, I've been a little busy.

But - ! I'm glad I started this one ... I really like it *G* You've done some neat things with the Scoobs (and I'm an AngstMonkey ... I love the Super Wheelchair Action Willow thing), you've got a great set-up with the new demon, and the portal needs to be closed again and all that.

And, of course, I love what you did with X/A ... because we all know how much I like X/A *G*

*happy sigh* This fic is really sweet - good job!

-Sass
PS Oooh ... check that out *G* I'm the 100th post - welcome to triple digits, Jomarch *G*

[This message has been edited by Sassette (edited March 28, 2002).]



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Thu Mar 28, 2002 2:29 pm 
*Owl* - Hi Sweetie, please have a good day today and I'm so sorry you had to beta this without Ch 8(said in Willow's pouty voice).Will send it soon.

*Sassette* - Oh, God, more pressure. I am absolutely flattered you like this. And well, you wanted angst right??? ok. Hope you write more. I'm on edge on my seat as it is.

Notes : Well, here we are at Ch 7. I did not want to post this unbeta'ed because it is sort of rated NC-17. I have never written fanfic before, much less smut and I only started reading it a couple of months ago. Anyway, I definitely think I should leave writing and writing smut to the professionals (Ruth's stuff is a great example as is Sassette's). So what I have written, is not too descriptive and I probably glossed over a lot(Owl has been great and says it ok). It is integral to the story though so I could not, not write it. And another warning is needed - it ends in a cliffhanger - It's not a gentle drop. Please don't shoot me.

Notes II - The Next Tara Maclay (if you're still reading), since Pixie pointed out that you're 13, I will write you a PG-13 version (and even add a new scene for you) if you want (just e-mail me).

Notes III - Feedback would be good. I really hope this goes over well. Thanks for reading.

Spoiler Warning - It has some spoilers up to Normal Again.
Disclaimer - All characters, names etc belong to ME. I am just borrowing them for this short while in order to make them do what I want for a change instead of waiting to see what happens every Tuesday.
Rating - NC-17 (I thnik, but I did gloss over stuff) .

Title : For All your Good Intentions


Chapter 7

It was decided that Giles would camp out on the couch at Buffy's while Xander and Anya would make their way back to his apartment. They had a lot to talk about and he did not want to intrude. Buffy had once again made up the couch for him and he had bid all of them goodnight. He watched as Tara lovingly carried Willow up the stairs, with Buffy following closely behind, hauling up her wheelchair. What amazing people they were - utterly remarkable, to be able to live and love amongst such adversity. He was indeed lucky to know and love them all - to be able to once again be a part of their lives.

In Willow and Tara’s bedroom, they began their nightly ritual, readying themselves for bed. Tara started by patiently laying out their nightclothes, a pale blue shift for her and snoopy pajamas for Willow. She had already placed Willow on the bed and the red-head was leaning against the headboard, slowly unbuttoning her top.

Tara watched her fumble with the buttons and finally remove the top. She watched as Willow slowly unhooked her bra and let it fall to the way side. Despite all that had happened, the one thing that had not changed drastically was their love for each other and their physical expression of it. Seeing Willow in front of her, she could feel the heat beginning to form at the pit of her stomach and spread in all directions. She slowly unbuttoned her jeans and slid out of them, never losing eye contact with Willow.

Willow for her part, had done all she could. She needed help with her jeans and waited patiently for Tara to finish. She couldn’t complain at all. She was thoroughly enjoying the view. Tara had lost some weight, which worried Willow but she could still make out some of the luscious curves on the blonde. They never had any trouble connecting physically. It was the last remaining vestige of their relationship. She may have lost the use of her legs and they may have lost their psychic connection but they could always come together, always.

“What are you looking at?” Tara asked playfully as she pulled the nightgown over her head. Her undergarments had been discarded to the side. “See anything you like?” she smiled as she made her way over to the bed.

She gently pulled Willow’s jeans down, taking her panties with them. As they reached Willow’s thighs, she bent down and gently place small kisses there despite knowing that Willow couldn’t feel them - she didn't care. She wanted to express her love in as many ways as possible and as many times as possible. She did not notice Willow’s expression of pure rapture as she kissed her way downwards, slowly, languorously. After, she reached for the pajama bottoms and helped Willow into them.

“It’s been a long day. Are you tired, Sweetie?” Willow ventured as Tara made her way to her side of the bed.

“Well, there is a lot to do tomorrow. We have to read up on the spell and plan when and how but..”

“But??” Willow repeated hopefully.

“I could use some snuggles….. and maybe something more?” Tara finished shyly.

“As you wish” Willow looked at her, the promised echoed in her words and her eyes.

Tara moved to the center of the bed. After the accident, they had adapted to the fact that Willow could not move her legs. Tara would move to the center and curve around Willow’s lithe but still form. She concentrated on caressing Willow’s upper body as much as possible. Her hands would roam a seemingly unstructured path across Willow’s body. But her hands and mouth had sense memory, she remembered which soft touch or kiss could ignite Willow’s passion. She could be blind and know exactly where to caress her lover and when to do it. Willow's body was a map that she had memorised by heart - every trail, every hidden treasure found , every pleasure shared.

Nibbling behind her ear would send shivers down the red-head’s spine. Slowly cupping her breast, her tongue flicking in and out around her nipple, could elicit such moans of pleasure from Willow. Moans that sounded like music to her ears - both an affirmation and a request. One that she complied with - would always comply with.

As her fingers trailed downwards, she could feel Willow try and arch her back - so she raised herself and slowly lowered her body, fully draping Willow’s, as her fingers found the soft wetness it was seeking. She was so intent on her exploration of Willow’s mouth, that she did not notice that Willow had curled one of her legs around Tara’s.

Willow was so lost in the rapture that was Tara. She could feel her spirit soar- she felt exalted - exposed to the knowledge of all things divine and of Tara, always Tara.

But as soon as Willow realized that she had moved one of her legs, ever so slightly - she kissed Tara with more fervor - more ardor. She used her own hands to explore the planes and curves of Tara’s body. Tara can’t find out, she thought to herself, as her hands made their way downwards along Tara’s spine. Oh Goddess, she could feel her orgasm building up.

Tara was lost in her, the blonde was concentrating so hard on exploring Willow’s body with her mouth and her supple hands, that she wouldn’t have noticed if Buffy had come in to watch. All she could feel was Willow - all she wanted was Willow, now.

Tara’s gentle stroking rhythm was sending waves of pleasure through Willow’s body, she could feel herself fly, her senses exploding around her and she increased her own rhythm, keeping in time with the blonde - always in sync, always together.

Tara’s final gift to her was their coming together, their timing perfect - Their love physically realized. Both tired but fully satisfied.

“Mmmmnn, I love you” Willow whispered in Tara’s ear as she once again settled by her side.

“I know” Tara whispered back “Now go to sleep, I’ll be right here in the morning”. With that, they snuggled together arms wrapped around each other and drifted of to sleep, sated and happy.

Tara used to love waking up early and greet the sunrise. But after Willow’s injury, she had dreaded it. Waking up meant acknowledging the ugly wheelchair at the side of the bed. Waking up meant she had to remember that Willow could not walk. But today… Today was slightly different. Last night, her dreams were not visions of Willow on that horrible night. Last night, she dreamt of their future - of children’s laughter and stolen kisses. Of being called mommy and visits with family - Giles, Xander, Anya, Dawn & Buffy and their own families. Such wonderful visions of love, Of life and being whole. Such dreams may come, she hoped silently sending up a prayer to the goddess.

She sensed Willow stirring beside her and turned to study her profile. She loved that beautiful face, her freckles, her pert nose. She wanted to wake up to that all the days of her life.

“Good morning, sleepy head” she whispered and leaned over to kiss Willow on the side of her mouth.

“Ummm, Tara-kiss, nothing better” Willow murmured, yet to open her eyes, “More” she pouted.

Tara soon complied and touched her lips to Willow’s, her tongue slowly probing them open and being accepted into Willow’s warm mouth.

“We should get up soon” she whispered breathlessly when they had both come up for air.

“Yeah” Willow conceded and opened her eyes, happy to be greeted by Tara's beautiful visage. She motioned for Tara to help her to her chair and Tara complied.

Today was a good day, she could feel it in her bones. She found herself wanting to whistle some nameless tune. Things were again looking up. Tara looked so happy and unguarded last night and especially this morning - she did not want anything to change, she did not want to acknowledge any change. Willow started to whistle something as she slowly maneuvered her way to the bathroom.

Tara, looked around the room and smiled as she heard her lover whistling. She was looking for an excuse - Anything. Yes! She rejoiced, Willow had forgotten to take her face towel, which was still on the dresser. She quickly grabbed it and went after Willow, maybe they could conserve water, maybe they should shower together.

Willow was so lost in her reverie that she did not notice the side table along the wall. Her left leg hit it full force and she cried out.

“Ow!!, Ow, Ow!, ohh! Owie” she muttered to herself while she slowly rubbed her shin with her hand.

She did not notice Tara standing in the room doorway, she only heard Tara's surprised gasp. She turned in time to see Tara drop her face towel on the floor as she raised her hand to her mouth. Tara’s head was shaking from side to side, a look of utter disbelief on her face.



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Thu Mar 28, 2002 4:11 pm 
I'll meet what Owl said, and raise you a: WTF!?!? AHHHH!


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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Thu Mar 28, 2002 4:34 pm 
Really liked it. And the story just keeps getting more interesting. Keep it up

------------------
Beep, beep



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Thu Mar 28, 2002 4:52 pm 
Look, you know, anyone can write dirty smut. Heh. It's true. But you've managed to communicate the real tenderness between them here, and it's beautiful. I love reading about them being with one another, how much they genuinely care aside from all the sexual stuff. The physical manifestation of their love is just a welcome side effect of how they feel. And you've managed to capture that here.

And woo! Willow hurt her leg! That's so cool! (and how often do you get to be happy about Willow in pain eh?)

------------------
You know I've been through hell...Joss can't you see, there'll be nothing left of me. You made me believe...



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Thu Mar 28, 2002 5:30 pm 
That was wonderful, extre kudos to Owl for betaing( is that a word????) on Passover.

This story keeps getting better and better, and just when I think I have it all figured out you go and change the rules.... does this mean Will may walk again??????

------------------
"As God as my witness I thought Turkeys could fly." L.Nesman, WKRP

[This message has been edited by Karzia (edited March 28, 2002).]



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Thu Mar 28, 2002 9:58 pm 
Lovely love scene One question, and this can't be a good thing, why is Willow lying to Tara adn everyone. I only come up with bad conclusions, things that would lead to more heartache Please update soon I have to know what happens!
-Will

------------------
"Hear that, baby? You're my always."



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Thu Mar 28, 2002 10:26 pm 
Hey Sweetie, what can I say but, "WOW." This story just gets better and better. I love all the twist and turns. Sorry, I am not quite myself this evening got some bad news and your story helped me through it. Thanks.
I need all the goodness I can get right now.
------------------
"We few, we happy few.."
"We band of buggered.."

[This message has been edited by Drakkenfyre (edited March 29, 2002).]



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Fri Mar 29, 2002 12:00 am 
Woo hoo! Willow's in pain! *Pixie looks at this sentence* Yeah, Ruth, that is weird. Jomarch - this is so good, sweetie!!! That was a lovely scene - not too graphic, just enough to show the physical manifestation of their connection. Very sweet and well done. Uh oh, watch out for that cliff - aaaaahhh...*swish, snap, boing* It's a good thing I have my harness.


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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Fri Mar 29, 2002 12:08 am 
quote:
Originally posted by jomarch:
But as soon as Willow realized that she had moved one of her legs, ever so slightly - she kissed Tara with more fervor - more ardor. She used her own hands to explore the planes and curves of Tara’s body. Tara can’t find out, she thought to herself, as her hands made their way downwards along Tara’s spine. Oh Goddess, she could feel her orgasm building up.

jomarch: Um, so Willow's hiding it from Tara? Am I missing something? But why?

This is really great, BTW. I'm loving it.

--Sela

quote:



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Fri Mar 29, 2002 12:33 am 
Hi Everyone. Wow, at least no one wants to kill me (thanks for that BTW). So many questions!! I have just finished Chapter 8. I had to cut an 18 hole golf game down to nine in order to write it today but I was playing like s**t anyway .

*MoMack* - Well does a "it will all be explained in Ch 8" beat the WTF???

*Puff* - Hi again. Thanks for the encouragement. Will try and keep it up!

*Tommo* - Hi sweetie, I must say that I am learning from the best. (note to self - read Final Exam, take test *written not oral*, write Ch 7)

*Karzia* - Thank you and no, no rule changing. And I would love it if Willow could walk right now but things are never easy and take time.

*willntlover* - Chapter 8 will explain a lot, I promise. Previuos chapters had some resolution but not all.

*Drakkenfyre* - Hi Hon! * jomarch sending good thoughts to Drakkenfyre* Hope things get better.

*Pixie* - Happy Seder and have a good Passover. So are you Mistress of Punctuation and Pain now??? Glad you're still enjoying the story. Good job on wearing the harness.

*Sela* - Do you want me to send you Ch 8? It will explain stuff. But then my Mistress of Punctuation, Owl may get all kind of mad. She had these previleges see. So I guess I have to send it to her instead.

Thanks for reading!



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Fri Mar 29, 2002 7:26 pm 
Hullo.
I'm off to go beta the next bit now, but I wanted to pop in and give a bit of commentary before I get all relieved (please, please?) feeling and whatnot.
Jomarch-- congrats indeed on the triple digits! I didn't mean to frighten you with my screaming, but you yourself anticipated it, and very correctly. That's all. And, you know... Nice warning for the kittens never hurt anyone.
The bitter herbs at seder tasted extra-bitter tinged with the gorkii taste of confusion left by your update. Now i need something real geshmak. Pixie, mein ziskeit, pass the manishewitz?
Speaking of passover, I just wanted to clear something up, as some folks are being extra nice to me 'cause I beta'ed on Pesach. This is much appreciated, though, I feel, undeserved, as Passover is not a religious holiday for me, but a be-with-some-of-my-best-friends-try-to-sing-things-in-hebrew-and-play-with-bouncy-plastic-plaguey-frogs holiday. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE holidays and all. still important, just, ach... i don't know what I'm trying to say, and am debating erasing this whole tangent.

Right. Jomarch, you don't know how proud i am to call myself your beta and Mistress of Punctuation. Proud to wear the uniform. and... bowing before the whip-o-grammar? intricate dancing? *waves to Bobo's Mom* A girl could get distracted thinking about such things...

Right. Fresh betaage, comin' right up!



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Fri Mar 29, 2002 9:24 pm 
Its nice to come back from the wedding from hell - part 1 (My brother in law just got married) and find the Chapter all beta'ed. I have been up since 5.30am (its now 12pm on Saturday here) and have to go back at 3 pm to help out again. And we don't even like him and he had to do it during Holy week which is difficult for me - Since he's not catholic, there is no church service and I can't go for any cause of helping out. Ok, sorry about rant.

Anyway, tomorrow is Easter and I will be taking a break so no update till the next week. Owl has to drive back to Ohio as well so I will just send her the Ch on Monday (my time).

*Owl* - so sorry abt the mix up with you celebrating Passover with your family as opposed to your friends. And I will always bow to the Mistress of Punctuation.

On with the story


Notes : Ok, why Ch 8 was written was due to the fact that I thought that Spike’s and Giles’s talks were good and important but still did not solve everything. Willow and Tara had to talk to each other. Hence I needed a catalyst and a resolution. The catalyst was Ch 7 and the resolution is Ch 8, hopefully.
Spoiler Warning - It has some spoilers up to Normal Again.
Disclaimer - All characters, names etc belong to ME. I am just borrowing them for this short while in order to make them do what I want for a change instead of waiting to see what happens every Tuesday.
Rating - PG .
Title : For All your Good Intentions


Chapter 8

“Tara” Willow called out as the blonde rushed passed her and down the stairs. Willow quickly wheeled herself towards the steps but stopped just in time, to avoid falling. “Buffy” she called at the top of her lungs, “Buffy!, I need you, NOW!”.

Meanwhile, Giles was awakened by Tara’s rush into the living room. She was crying, that much he could see but she did not look physically hurt. He heard Willow yelling for Buffy and immediately jumped to his feet.

‘Tara!” he called out, catching the blonde as she tried to run pass him, “What’s wrong, where’s Willow?”. At that question, she stopped struggling and looked into his eyes. He was taken aback at the raw pain he saw there - at the despair. He slowly led her back to the sofa. As she sat down, he saw her curl into herself. It was a gesture of profound surrender - he was indeed worried.

He saw Buffy coming down the stairs looking just as worried as she carried Willow in her arms. Dawn was behind them, trying to rub sleep from her eyes.

“Tara” Willow called out “Please, I can explain, please, look at me, please baby. Please!”. But Tara was still curled up on the sofa.

“Buffy, could you please put me down”

“What, here?” Buffy indicated to the ground.

“Yes” Willow insisted. “Now, I need to do this”

As Buffy placed her down, Tara lifted her tear-stained face. She looked like she was going to bolt at any minute. Willow slowly began to drag herself to the couch. “Baby, I wanted to tell you but I couldn’t. I didn’t deserve to….” Willow continued, tears streaming down her face.

“H-h-how, long have you known?” Tara asked timidly, not wanting to hear the answer she was dreading. A major part of her was thrilled that Willow could feel something but the fact that Willow had hid it from her. The fact that she didn’t want Tara to know. She realized that this meant that Willow has never forgiven her for that night. Willow loved her but had not - could not - forgive her.

Buffy, Giles and Dawn stood there transfixed. They knew that they were intruding but could not bring themselves to leave - not if two of their friends, were in so much obvious pain.

“I started having small tremors in my left leg six weeks ago but I couldn’t really feel anything. Nothing - not until today” Willow answered softly. She wanted to know why Tara had reacted so badly to the news. Yes, she should have told the blonde immediately, but what of her own fears. She was so afraid that Tara had only stayed with her out of pity. But she loved her so very much and accepted that - if it were the case. What would happen is she no longer needed the chair? Would Tara stay then?

“S-s-six weeks and you never said anything” Tara stated “W-w-why.., why Willow? I know you love me and I guess now I know that you haven’t really forgiven me” she looked down, not wanting Willow to see the hurt and distress in her eyes.

“What!, Tara, no, you don’t understand” Willow cried out “That’s not why…, I mean….God I love you so much!” she had reach the front of the sofa and was reaching out to the blonde but Tara pulled back instinctively.

Willow had to make her see, had to make her understand, “Don’t you see, I don’t deserve to walk. Not after all I’ve done, I don’t deserve you….” Willow broke down in huge gasping sobs.

“No” Buffy whispered in the back “No” she stated more vehemently, “How can you say that?” she asked looking at her best friend on the floor and at Tara's desolate look. She really did not want to see the return of THAT look or of Willow crying. "NO" she stated again.

“YES” Willow answered through her tears, “This is my punishment, don’t you understand? After what I’ve done - to Dawn…To everyone. I could have killed Dawn and then the spells I did on Tara and the gang - I never thought of the consequences. Do you want me to continue? Do you want me remind you that I was the one who pulled you out of heaven. It's all me. I don’t ever deserve to walk!” she choked out “Never!”

Tara slowly reached out to touch her lover, Willow's self flagellation made her want to ease the red-head's pain - to try and take it upon herself. She slowly caressed Willow's head, “But, It’s my fault. You got hurt because I called you. I… I started the chain of events. You should not have been there. I und…, I understand if you can’t forgive me for that. I can’t forgive myself.” Tara hung her head but did not want to stop touching Willow so she let her hand drop to Willow's shoulder.

“No” Dawn interjected, “This is not happening! You love each other, why can’t you just work it out? It’s not fair!” she cried as she rushed to the kitchen. Buffy made after her but Giles held her back, “You make sure they’re alright” he indicated to Tara and Willow, “and I’ll see to Dawn”. Buffy moved forward and knelt next to her best friend as Willow once again tried to explain to Tara.

“Tara, I was going to you anyway” Willow held on to the hand Tara had reached out with. “I was going to go to where you and Buffy were. I had finished re-routing the system and all Xander had to do was call the police as soon as the gates were opened. I could not leave you and Buffy to face Warren and his gang. I figured out that two witches were better than one and three against three evened the odds.” She took a deep breath and continued, “I’m sorry I did not tell you about the tremors in my leg. I was frightened that you stayed because you felt bad for me and it was so easy to love you and have you here with me. I didn’t want that to change. I’d rather be a half person with you than a whole person without” she finished.

Tara looked into Willow's eyes. She really looked this time and began to understand Willow's thought processes. The hiding was due to the hacker's own doubts, it was not about trust or forgiveness. Doubts that she should not have had if Tara had been more open, if she had not become mired in her own pain.

“I guess we are a pair aren’t we?” Tara sniffed “How could two people who love each other so much not realize how much we were hurting each other and ourselves?”

“It happens to the best of them” Buffy added helpfully “I mean, Romeo and Juliet, Anthony and Cleopatra, umm… Tom & Nicole”.

“Those were all tragedies” Willow exclaimed, also sniffling.

“Um, Wesley and Buttercup” Buffy once again volunteered and earned a small smile from Tara.

It seemed that the storm had passed and they had once again gained another breakthrough. Buffy just hoped that this was the last. Her heart couldn’t take any more aches of this nature. These two people belonged together and she would make sure nothing stood in their way. Even if she had to kill it. She was the slayer, after all.



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Fri Mar 29, 2002 10:25 pm 
not you, silly! actually meant karzia.
and not offended, just not wanting to take credit when credit is not due....

i can't believe i have to wait 'til monday now! (the pain! the pain!)
Sorry to hear about your real life pain, *transatlantic hug* and Happy Happy Easter!

[This message has been edited by Owl (edited March 30, 2002).]



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Fri Mar 29, 2002 10:32 pm 
Hello Mistress beta.

Actually, Monday for me is Sunday for you (but you'll be driving back then).

Check your e-mail!

Jomarch.



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Fri Mar 29, 2002 11:30 pm 
No heartache!! Well minimal, but that can be over looked. Loved it, and now there is a light in the horizon
-Will

------------------
"Hear that, baby? You're my always."



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 Post subject: Fic -For All Your Good Intentions
PostPosted: Sat Mar 30, 2002 12:36 am 
thnx so much... I loved this chapter... just what I needed

I´m just sad there are only 2 chapters left..... do I have to beg for a sequel or new story????

------------------
They were suppose to be my light at the end of the tunnel. I guess they were a train.



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