Posts: 420
Registered: Sep 2000 posted November 25, 2000 00:08
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hey hon! merry unbirthday to you. as soon as i read what you wrote about the fanfic dropping post *family* i wrote this little diddy for you, and anyone else who'd like to read it. I asked a while back whether this was legal and i think someone said yes. so if it isn't then just read it and delete miss moderator fantastica! hope you like.
Willow and Tara during the mini patrol of the episode *Shadow*, if that's what it was called. i refer to is as *snake* . They are walking around the cemetery, holding hands of course.

Tara- Umm, Willow…
Willow- Yes?
Tara- Why are we out looking for this huge serpent cobra thingy, at dusk, alone?
Willow- Good question. We have enough to worry about in Sunnydale don't we?
Tara- Well, it just seems silly for us to risk our lives to find something we can't really fight. We could get killed and that would be - not cool.
Willow- (looks over to her) Are you having mortality issues?
Tara- Willow, I never thought I was immortal. I just thought I was a demon. Not all demons are immortal.
Willow- Really?
Tara- Uh huh… So this is what you guys do most of the time? When you patrol? Walk around. Talk to each other?
Willow- Well, we brought chips last time but soldier boy made us get rid of the bag.
Tara- Kinda hard to stake a vamp with oily fingers, huh?
Willow- I don't even understand why we went along with him.
Tara- I guess the writer though the audience needed some comic relief.
Willow- Yeah it was a pretty heavy episode wasn't it?
Tara- Yeah… What was it about again? Oh, Spike's past.
Willow- He was such a ninny.
Tara- Yeah.

Harmony jumps out at them all vamp faced. Transforms back to human when she realizes its just Willow.

Harmony- Oh, it's you.
Willow- Harmony… Hey! How come you didn't attack us?
Harmony- Like I'd want t you to be my minion.
Willow- You are aware that's not the only reason you can attack people right?
Harmony- Oh! Right, thanks Willow. (vamps out again)
Willow- (jumps back) Wait! That's not fair.
Harmony- (stopping) How come?
Willow- Cause I came up with that idea.
Tara- (confused) This is Harmony?
Willow- Yeah.
Harmony- (back to normal) What do you mean? Of course I'm Harmony. Do I know you?
Tara- No.
Harmony- Who are you?
Tara- Tara.
Harmony- Oh you're Willow's "special" friend. Spike talks about you two all the time. He's a sick puppy but I love my honey bunny.
Willow- Eww I don't wanna know.
Tara- (to Willow) Maybe we should ask him. He might know.
Harmony- What?
Willow- Harm, have you seen a giant cobra running around lately?
Harmony- Oh my god. Where?! I hate snakes!
Willow- It's probably after Buffy. We're trying to find it.
Harmony- Well, if it's after the Slayer then I'll be sure to give it directions to her house.
Willow- Harmony we used to be friends.
Harmony- No we weren't.
Willow- Ok, but… You know you've changed since high school and I don't like it. Wait until Cordelia hears about you.
Harmony- You know what the difference is between me and you, Rosenberg? Besides the your whole lack of fashion and good taste - I can kill you. (vamps out again)
Tara- Hey!
Willow- Harmony you don't want to mess with us.
Harmony- Really why? You're just a silly human. You were always were such a nerd Willow. You and Amy thinking you could be witches. As if.
Tara- She's a great witch.
Willow- Don't mess with us. I may not be so powerful yet but I have staked a vampire with a floating pencil.
Harmony- Really? Do you see any writing utensils here? Besides why are you two out alone without even a stake? It's like- dumb.
Willow- Tara's a really powerful witch.
Harmony- Is she? Then she does have a reason for the horrible wardrobe and hair color. Yuck-o.
Tara- Hey! It's not my fault Xander messed up the mixture.
Harmony- You let monkey boy dye your hair? G-d you're a dumb witch. Plus that doesn't even begin to answer your makeup.

Tara, angry, stares at Harmony and quickly averted her eyes to a bush. It burst in flames.

Harmony- (back to normal) Ok. Hi, I didn't mean anything I just said. It's all this peroxide I use to keep my hair blonde. Kills brain cells.
Willow- Just take us to Spike.

Entering Spike's crypt.

Harmony- Love bunny I'm home. We've got human visitors.

Spike was sniffing Buffy's underwear.

Willow- Is that Buffy's underwear?
Harmony- SPIKE!
Spike- What? No, luv, these are for you. (holds it out to her)
Tara- (to Willow) How do you know they are her underwear?
Harmony- Eww!
Spike- (to Harmony) They aren't. What are wiccie Ellen and Ann doing here? (to Tara) And why wasn't I invited to your shindig? That hurt.
Harmony- (still mad at him) I read it in a magazine that they broke up. So did Melissa and Julie.
Tara- (to Harmony) What are you talking about? When did they break up?
Spike- What is going on here?
Willow- (getting a better look at the undies) Hey! That is Buffy's underwear. I gave them to her for her birthday! What are you doing with them?
Tara- (to Willow) You what?
Willow- As a joke. For Riley.
Spike- Yeah right. You've been jonezin' for the Slayer since the moment you laid eyes on her.
Willow- (to Spike) What? No! (off his look to Tara) Ok so I thought she was cute but I never… I was obsessed with Xander remember? Harmony back me up.
Harmony- I'm still trying to figure out why you bought her sexy lingerie.
Willow- It was a joke plus we're off topic.
Tara- (crossing her arms) You haven't bought me any sexy lingerie.
Willow- Oh honey…
Spike- It'd only come off as soon as you'd put it on. Wanna try these?
Harmony- (to Spike) That's it! Out! I want you out! (starts throwing clothes about) I cannot take anymore of this. First you bitch and moan about Barfsilla all day and night. Then you drool all over the Slayer, and don't think I haven't noticed the striking resemblance between your little mannequin and Buffy mister. You probably fantasize about her when you're making love to me. And I'm sure you've got naked threesome fantasies with these two-
Spike- I've never dreamt about these two - naked - ever. Hey, where'd they go?

Willow and Tara are walking back to the Magic shoppe.

Willow- This patrol was such a bust.
Tara- A-are you going to tell Buffy?
Willow- Maybe if we'd come up with something.
Tara- I meant about Spike.
Willow- Oh… No.
Tara- So, are you ever going to get me sexy lingerie?
Willow- Spike was right. They'd only come off as soon as you put them on. If they even got that far.

And just cause there needs to be a close up of them kissing…
Close up of them kissing.

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*a few thoughts on the subject by a lil' nothing*, Rasputina

Queen of Denial
Doll's eye crystal

Posts: 89
Registered: Oct 2000 posted November 25, 2000 00:52
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LOL rane! great stuff as always. Love it when tara gets jealous and of course that smooch at the end *sigh*


xita
Ms. Moderator
Fantastico

Posts: 3340
Registered: Sep 2000 posted November 25, 2000 00:54
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Hey Rane, you rock! Giving me sweet w/t fic with a kiss at the end. Harmony, gotta love that girl. I like your humorous fic. And in my mind now are visions of w/t kissing and Tara in sexy lingerie! Thanks Rane! Feel free to give me more early birthday presents


Rane
Willowhand

Posts: 420
Registered: Sep 2000 posted November 25, 2000 01:20
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*g* glad you all enjoyed it. i always get a little silly when the new moon rolls around.
oh, g-d. i just realized it's my ex boyfriends b-day. i need to write him an email.

g'night!

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*a few thoughts on the subject by a lil' nothing*, Rasputina

fell
Cool Monster Fighter

Posts: 213
Registered: Nov 2000 posted November 25, 2000 02:41
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Rane- LUV your excellent fic. I'm still laughing. You've really got the voices down. More, more, more!


Kiwiccan
Nether World Anchor

Posts: 508
Registered: Sep 2000 posted November 25, 2000 04:16
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Great short Story Rane. This is funny stuff. Question for ya: Now that you have finished your stories for season 4(which I loved), will you be writing any for season 5?
Hope so.

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Paula
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Amber FanGirl #1a
May the Amber Force be with you.

ryanpunker
Doll's eye crystal

Posts: 80
Registered: Oct 2000 posted November 25, 2000 11:11
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Awesome fic, Rane!!
That was hilarious and you really did get Tara's personality down accurate.

Please write more...please...ok, good. Thanks

Rane
Willowhand

Posts: 420
Registered: Sep 2000 posted November 25, 2000 18:18
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thanks for the boost! i'll write some season five stuff soon i promise. this was just a fluke though. i'm still trying to finish my velvet web series first (if i ever finish it) maybe i'll just kill it and continue on our merry way since i wanna write dawn... stay tuned, i guess. thanks again!
[This message has been edited by Rane (edited 11-25-2000).]

april
Gay Now!

Posts: 1452
Registered: Oct 2000 posted November 25, 2000 23:03
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tee hee...rane, truly excellent fic! i've always thought that harmony, spike and the "loverwiccas" should have a bit of interaction...
i like, i like!

wolliw
Cool Monster Fighter

Posts: 263
Registered: Nov 2000 posted November 26, 2000 11:33
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What a wonderfully satisfying read for something relatively short! It has great humor, romance, sauciness, emotional realness -- all through spot-on dialogue. Thank you ).

Rane
Willowhand

Posts: 342
Registered: Sep 2000 posted November 30, 2000 17:07
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episode: the creepy cockroach alien one
scene: library...
spoilers: not really... i dunno
feedback: much appreciated
delete: if you want to
notes: in my TYG fic i had willow enroll in astronomy so that's why she has a book, and etc... you'll understand what i'm saying once you start reading
Willow, Tara, Anya, Giles and Xander are walking into the library. Xander is looking through Willow's astronomy book. A look of confusion is clouding face and is walking quite wobbly.

Giles- (sitting down) Well, we'll need to find out if there have been any other meteorites that have crashed recently.
Willow- (sits by the computer) Oh! I can search the extragalactic database on the web.
Tara- (stands next to Willow) I can check newspapers.
Xander- Your textbook is a little too technical for me Will. I'll just go look for some grade school astronomy books I can flip though. (walks off)
Anya- (sitting down) And I'll just color me bored.
Tara- Umm, Anya why don't you help me?
Anya- (thinks about it a sec) Oh, all right.

Anya follows Tara to the microfilm section of the library. Tara begins to look through the logs.

Anya- We're actually going to research? I thought you were being smart and getting us away from the research musketeers. (off Tara's *angelic* look =) So what do we need to do?
Tara- Umm, scan through periodicals? Maybe we should look at other countries. See if anything has happened internationally?
Anya- But that's just too many! I miss colonization and the one flow of information. Can't we just do one or two countries and pretend we're really researching? We could go for coffee.
Tara- (smiles) No.
Anya- Oh you're no fun.
Tara- Look, we'll compromise. We'll research now and then go for coffee. We'll even use this thing to make the process go faster. (pointing at the microfilm machine)
Anya- Ok, but do you know how to use this? Looks like a deformed computer.
Tara- Not really. (off her look) I used it once.
Anya- Great. We'll be here all night.

Xander- (arriving with books) Look! Astronomy for Dummies! Tickle me pink! (off Giles look) I'm quiet!
Giles- So is what you're doing legal?
Willow- Do you have to ask me cause, you know, I can't lie to you.
Giles- I rescind the question.

Anya- (smiling as the plays with one microfilm roll) So these teeny rolls have every single newspaper?
Tara- You know what? We can't use this. (sets down the log) Newspapers are dailies. This stuff is more for magazines.
Anya- Our job is done! To the Espresso Pump!
Tara- To the internet.
Anya- Again, you're not fun.
Tara- Come on.

As they walk over to the row of computers.

Anya- I like your hairdo.
Tara- Thanks.
Anya- Did Willow do it?
Tara- No.
Anya- I like it.
Tara- Thanks.
Anya- You know I did vengeance for a woman once who looked just… Nothing.
Tara- (turning on two computers) What?
Anya- Oh nothing. I'm just getting all nostalgic and what not. Don't mind me. Just point and click me in the right direction baby. Umm, I meant technologically speaking not otherwise. Though don't get me wrong. A really, really long time ago I was drunk in this island in Greece and…
Tara- Anya…
Anya- Yes?
Tara- Yahoo.
Anya- What?
Tara- Search engine… International newspapers. Recent meteriote crashes.
Anya- Right.
Tara- (sitting down and smiling) We can, umm, talk about your Greek orgies another time.
Anya smiles at her remark. She then looks at the computer screen in front of her and frowns.

Willow- No recent crashes. (to Giles) Something I don't understand is that that meteorite was huge. A thing that big should have devastated Sunnydale - half of California even. We should be a huge impact crater right now. (just stating the obvious)
Giles- Yes, well let's thank the gods for that then. I did not just say that.
Xander- You've been hanging with the wiccies huh?
Willow- What's that supposed to mean?
Xander- Nothing. I don't think there even is a god so it doesn't matter.
Willow- No god? At all? Belief in powers that be and organized religion is different, Xander. What do you think created us?
Xander- We're stardust. (points to a book) It says so right here.
Willow- And who do you think created startdust?
Xander- (chuckles) David Bowie.
Giles- (smiles at the remark but soon gets his patented Giles look) In the beginning there was always something… before the beginning. (sighs) Can we please just get back to researching. I'm starting to talk like you two.

Anya- (strikes the enter key and gets frustrated) Am I doing this right? How come I keep getting stuff on meat?
Tara- (looks over) You spelled meteorite wrong.
Anya - I knew that looked funny.
Tara- M-e-t-e- orite.
Anya- Thank you. I still don't know how to write English very well.
Tara- What was your first language?
Anya- I don't remember. Aramaic, maybe. What about you?
Tara- What do you mean?
Anya- Considering your background... (off her look) Your lineage. You're from a bunch of witches right?
Tara- Oh…
Anya- Well aren't witches all about Latin?
Tara- Yeah. But I learned English first. We were forbidden to, umm…
Anya- It must have sucked to have your father lie to you like that.
Tara- I don't think it was entirely his fault, he was taught the same thing. I mean, it is his fault. He blindly feared what he didn't comprehend. (pensive silence)
Anya- A lot of people do. I just accept and move on. Except when I lost my powers.
Tara- But you have moved on. And you're better for it.
Anya- What?
Tara- You now have Xander.
Anya- Yeah, I do. And you have Willow. I'd say that's more than a fair trade on both our parts huh?

45 minutes later.

Xander- (shuts a book loudly) Ok. I'm getting crosseyed. These terms are so not to my understanding. I don't even know why you are taking this astronomigilogical class.
Willow- It's fascinating. So much space and matter out there. And miles and miles of, umm, emptiness.
Xander- (stretches out and sees the universe tied to the ceiling) Wow. Check out the model. (walks over to it)
Willow- (smiling) You remember when we had to make that model of our solar system in fourth grade?
Xander- Yeah and my dog actually ate my homework. I got detention cause no one believed me.
Willow- (frowns) And then he died.
Giles- What pleasant memories.
Xander- Well that's all we had in the Harris household. Darn tootin pleasant memories…

continues on to the scene where Xand says *look at...* i'd transcript it but it's not posted yet.

hope you liked! more to come... some day!

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*a few thoughts on the subject by a lil' nothing*, Rasputin

[This message has been edited by Rane (edited 11-30-2000).]

april
Gay Now!

Posts: 1191
Registered: Oct 2000 posted November 30, 2000 17:18
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rane, it's way cute! i like i like!
thanks for posting it for all of us kitties! oh and here, have some bouncies!

Teresa
Doll's eye crystal

Posts: 72
Registered: Sep 2000 posted November 30, 2000 17:42
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That was sooooo cute. Thanks for sharing it. I especially loved the scenes with Anya and Tara.
Teresa

hopey
Cool Monster Fighter

Posts: 147
Registered: Nov 2000 posted November 30, 2000 22:44
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ok rane ... i love your fictions ... i was wondering ... can i be on your mail list?


xita
Ms. Moderator Fantastico

Posts: 2674
Registered: Sep 2000 posted December 01, 2000 00:25
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My very own series! Thank you Rane, thank you thank you!
I am so happy today and the fic was great. I love Tara/Anya scenes. They are just so different.


fell
Cool Monster Fighter

Posts: 155
Registered: Nov 2000 posted December 01, 2000 00:55
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Nice job with the voices, Rane. You've really got them down.
Now on another possible fic topic, W/T could have been up on that roof for hours before the meteorite fell, Hmmm? Whatcha think?

Rane
Willowhand

Posts: 342
Registered: Sep 2000 posted December 01, 2000 11:09
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i'm glad y'all liked it. i'd love to have my own personal email list (tee hee) or website (queen, me!) but my comp sucks and therefore i don't. that's why i started that computer advice post. but i'll just keep fixin' you for as long as i can churn out these little fics and i'll send them off to the sites when i'm done with them so i dont have another huge series.
OH! i wrote a ditty for *Real Me*, Tara/Dawn and Willow/Tara. After revising it for the 100th time i'll post it on this thread or not... maybe i should start an email list cause i feel bad posting on this board... but this is sort of willow/tara oriented huh? i just need the kitten now...

ryanpunker
Doll's eye crystal

Posts: 80
Registered: Oct 2000 posted December 01, 2000 14:25
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Great fic, Rane!
Love the Anya/Tara scenes. You always seem to get the characters dialogue down perfect; alwasys so in character.

Can't wait fer the next one.

ryan

*reposted at new board