ok, i forgot where i left off and had to look on the thread. how crazy am i?this next part has no tara... just thought i'd tell you up front. well, there's thoughts of Tara and what they did in the meadow... *AND* there is some Oz/Willow angstyness so be warned. i'm just tyring to set up a backstory here. this part is just a filler to the upcoming t/w goodies or angst. i'm not sure yet.
its kinda weird posting without a beta so if something doens't make sense please let me know since it's kinda hard to beta yourself. i dont mind frankness. Oh and i cant write harmony. just letting you know now.
so, i hope you like this next installment.
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The instant Willow reached the camp she knew she’d be in trouble for being tardy to the staff meeting. Crossing through the grounds, passing the touch football game in the open field and various activity shacks filled with campers, she thought about how she’d never been late to anything in her life. Never. She was always five minutes early. Ten sometimes. And now she was late again. Time spent with Tara warped time on earth. Why couldn’t real time slow down as it did when with the blonde?
As she ran up the steps to the assembly hall Willow could hear Harmony’s voice loud and clear. “Any questions so far?” she had just asked enthusiastically as if addressing a group of children.
Willow tried to make a quiet entrance but failed miserably. The old door creaked and shut behind her quite loudly once she stepped inside. The gathered group of counselors quickly turned their heads over to Willow and stared.
Willow felt a powerful blush coming on. “Hi?” she meekly voiced as she looked over the room for an empty chair. Luckily, Buffy had saved a seat next to her and waved her over.
As Willow walked across Harmony rolled her eyes and handed her a packet of stapled papers. “Willow, finally, here’s your role.” she said with the type of annoyed tone she normally regarded the redhead with.
“Role?” Willow asked her eyes widening in fear.
“Duh, for the production.”
“There’s a production?” Willow’s heart stopped. This was all she needed. She had terrible stage fright; it even haunted her in her dreams.
“Yah. God, you make it sound like you’ve never been to camp before. We always have a play at the end of the session.”
“Play?” She still couldn’t grasp the fact Harmony had just given her a part in a play. She hadn’t even auditioned for it. She *never* would have auditioned for it.
“Hello? Do you have amnesia or something?” Harmony looked at her queerly. Some counselors chuckled at the comment.
“It’s not ‘Death of a Salesman’ is it?” Willow questioned evoking an unpleasant memory of one of her frightful thespian dreams. “Or ‘Madam Butterfly’?” she asked recalling another.
Harmony fabricated a faux laugh. “Why don’t you just sit down and… Just sit down.” She turned to the rest of the group. “So…” she continued to address those gathered.
Willow quickly sat besides Buffy and with her eyes wordlessly asked her what was going on. Buffy grinned and patted her knee, “We’re stage hands. Don’t worry.”
As relief spread over her face, Willow sighed. “Thank the lords.”
“Where’ve you been?” Buffy whispered. “Flutie was here and I think he noticed you weren’t. Why do you smell like sage?” she asked candidly.
“Um, excuse me, Buffy. Willow.” Harmony interrupted their quiet conversation. “I’m the one talking here right now, ok? Pay attention to me.”
Both Willow and Buffy huffed and rolled their eyes at the same time.
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Harmony had gone on and one about how she wanted this year’s play to be professional and that she didn’t want anyone taking their roles lightly. They would have auditions on Monday and rehearsals after lunch, three times a week. Miss Post brought up a couple of other topics to discuss as well. Apparently one cabin had raided another one and stolen all their underwear a few days ago and still hadn't returned the garments, a group of kids were caught smoking pot behind the infirmary, and someone had stolen Flutie’s pot bellied pig from his hut. It was starting to feel like last summer all over again.
After the staff conference, Buffy and Willow headed over to the other side of the camp to pick up their campers. Buffy had dropped them off with the music instructor once she realized Willow was going to be late to the meeting. Willow was never late and it worried Buffy a bit but she knew Willow could take care of herself. She sure proved it to her last night. And besides, what demon ventured out during the day?
As the two girls crossed the camp, Buffy asked, “So, off handling your herbs again? Did you get all trance-y and lose track of time?” she chuckled thinking how absurd that sounded. Willow smoking anything was a laugh. ‘Could you even smoke sage like that?’ she wondered.
Willow was gently biting one of her nails with a small grin on her lips, lost in other thoughts and didn’t reply.
“Hello? Earth to Willow Rosenberg. Come in, Rosenberg.” Buffy spoke after staring at Willow for a second.
“Huh?” Willow was snatched away from her pensive state. “What?”
“Where were you? What happened?”
Willow was a bit hesitant to reply. It wasn’t only because she had been with Tara, its just she knew that since after accidentally torching Buffy’s favorite sweater one night last year, Buffy didn’t like her dabbling in the witchy arts without proper training. So, she lied, “Oh, you know how I get when I’m doing research.” Willow was a terrible liar yet somehow she pulled this one off.
“With Tara?”
Willow’s heart skipped a beat. Maybe she hadn’t pulled it off as smoothly as she thought. “Um, yeah. How’d you know?” she nervously asked as her thoughts wandered to Tara. Willow could still feel Tara’s lips on hers and her own thin fingers smoothly traveling over her shoulders blades, down the blonde’s back. She could still hear Tara giggling in her ear.
“Slayer nose. You smell like vanilla.” Buffy registered Willow’s look of longing. “You ok?” she asked her a bit baffled by her friends expression.
“Yeah, fine.” Willow sighed. There was so much she wanted to tell her best friend but couldn’t find the words. She was scared of what she’d say, of what she’d think of her, of what she’d think of Tara.
“Will-“ Buffy began to speak but was interrupted when a soccer ball hit the ground just in front of their feet. With her Slayer reflexes Buffy quickly snatched it up before it bounced elsewhere.
Riley hastily ran up to them smiling widely at Buffy, “Eyes open, ladies. You never know when a ball will cross your path.”
“Yeah, we don’t want to get knocked out or something.” Buffy grinned as she kissed her boyfriend. “We’re off to get our kids.”
Riley chuckled. “Are you sure they’re ours? I don’t recall-“ Buffy playfully tapped his arm. But her Slayer strength unfortunately still packed a punch. “Ow.”
“Aw, baby. I’m sorry.” Buffy stroked his arm in a soothing gesture.
Willow was getting restless. “I’m going to go ahead. I’ll see you there, Buff. ” she said as she bound for the music room.
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Later that night, no matter how hard she tried to pay attention to her task at hand, Willow’s thoughts roamed back to Tara and their afternoon together. Her cherry lips, her azure eyes, her gentle hands, and satiny skin. Coming down from the magick high of the little ritual, Willow had held on to Tara and snuggled. She thought about how she cherished caressing all the generous curves of the girl’s body, slowly memorizing each womanly curvature with her hands, even over fabric. And the way Tara said her name with every touch, how she reverently whispered it in her ear.
“Willow… Willow?” Oz voiced again.
Willow’s musings were abruptly interrupted and she quickly realized it was Oz’s voice. She was in Oz’s hut, the one he shared with Devon. His laptop was perched on her knees and a private website on demonology she’d hacked into was up on the computer screen. She noticed the table in front of her was littered with books on demons they’d brought from home just in case they needed to research. That’s what she was doing, she was researching. Or had been until she began to fantasize about the blonde witch.
“You ok?” He asked looking at her peculiarly.
“Uh…” Willow was so flustered she couldn’t think of what to say to him. Had she said anything out loud? Was she drooling? “I-I’m fine. Did you find something?” She questioned trying to get back into research mode.
“No.” he smiled. “It’s just you went all trance-y there for a few minutes and
I didn’t know whether to interrupt you or not.”
A few minutes? “Did I say anything?” she asked as she bit her lower lip.
Oz chuckled and shook his head. “No, just a couple of sighs here and there.”
“I sighed?” Willow’s eyes widened. “What kind of sighs?! No, you know what, don’t tell me. I don’t want to know. Let’s just get back to business.” She looked down to the laptop. “Demons. Yay.” She began to read a paragraph at random and grimaced. “Yuck. They don’t have to be that descriptive.”
Oz sat the book he’d been reading down on the table and grabbed another one. “There’s nothing in this one. Besides Buffy’s ‘yucky, yucky’ and ‘wicked strong’ description can you remember anything else about the demon? A marking maybe?” Oz asked reclined in his chair.
The redhead shook her head. “No... It was just yucky, yucky and wicked strong.”
Oz nodded. “I’ll be sure to tell Giles to initiate a whole subdivision for yucky, yucky and wicked strong demon categories.”
“Oz.” Willow groaned as she looked over to him. He never took anything seriously. He was always so controlled, so calm. Once in a while he’d burst out with a funny wisecrack but usually he was just quiet.
“Sorry.” He smiled as he proceeded to scan the book in front of him.
Willow watched him read. She remembered how she’d run her fingers through his short hair and how his five o’clock shadow would sometimes scratch her chin when they kissed. How she was so proud to be dating a guy in a band and how he always protected her whenever they patrolled with Buffy. He had been so loving and sweet, and patient.
She couldn’t believe she had been totally in love with him a year ago and now she felt nothing for him in her heart like that. She still loved him, always would, but her heart now belong to another. She never imagined she could ever fall in love so completely and so hard all over again, and certainly never thought it would have been with a woman.
“Oz?… Can I ask you something?” Willow tentatively asked.
“Of course.” He answered never looking up from the book he was reading.
“It’s kinda personal.” She quietly mentioned.
Oz looked up at her. “What?”
Willow could feel the blush rising. “We went out for over a year before we… You know.” She looked down to her hands when she couldn’t get the words out.
“Made love?” He grinned softly.
“Yeah…” Willow said remembering their first time together. She had been so nervous, so scared but he’d been nothing more than gentlemanly with her. “And then four months later you broke up with me. Was I- Did I…” ‘Suck?’ she thought.
Oz chuckled lightly. “I know what you’re thinking and no. You weren’t ready before.” He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. “But then, after that, I realized I wasn’t what you really needed.” His features held no ill will, his lips were still curled.
Willow didn’t understand. “But you still… We still-“
“Oz, my man!” Devon entered their hut interrupting the ex-lovers’ conversation. Although he noticed Willow’s ticked off eyes and Oz’s restrained look he plopped on his disheveled bed and asked, “What’s going on?”
Willow quickly stood up and placed the laptop on the table, she gathered her things to leave.
“Willow, wait.” Oz stood up besides her.
“No, I gotto go.” She said dejectedly as she began to walk away.
Oz reached out and held her back. “Let me walk you to your cabin. Ok? Please?”
Willow knew Riley and Buffy were patrolling and she didn’t want to risk running into another demon all alone. She slowly acquiesced to his request and they headed out together.
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Neither one said a word during their walk across the camp towards Willow’s cabin. There was nothing to say. Oz was used to silence but never with Willow. He knew things were changing. He knew something was happening. He just wished he’d be able to control his emotions even though he knew he couldn’t. Not when it came to Willow. He was still in love with her but he had to let her go. He knew that much.
The night sky was illuminated by a half moon and as they neared cabin 7 Willow noticed a small figure shadowed on the steps. The body was curled forward as if it were crying.
“Jamie?” Willow asked as soon as she neared the cabin.
The thin girl quickly sat up and wiped her tears away. “Hey.”
“Honey, what’s wrong?” Willow asked as she quickly sat besides her and pulled her into a hug, mindful of the sprained elbow.
Oz nodded realizing this was a girly moment that probably shouldn’t include him. “I guess I’ll… See ya later, Willow.” He half waved before shoving his hand in his jackets pockets.
“Bye, Oz. Thanks.” She smiled softly.
“Sure.” He replied and headed back down to his side of the camp.
Willow turned her attention to Jamie. “Did something happen?”
“No.” Jamie sniffled and wiped her nose with her good hand.
“Liar.” Willow chuckled.
“I want to go home.” Jamie’s voice trembled.
“Is it your arm?” Willow asked wondering what could make her want to leave.
“No. I don’t fit in here, Willow. I don’t like not fitting in. It sucks. They make fun of my glasses and clothes, and now they make fun of this stupid sling I have to wear because I was silly enough to fall off a chair.”
Willow knew exactly how Jamie felt. “Can I tell you a story?”
Jamie rolled her eyes and smirked. “Is it one of your never ending ones? I’ve heard you and Buffy talk at night. You babble a lot, you know that?”
Willow was shocked dumb by Jamie’s straightforwardness but pretty soon she felt a ripple of laughter building inside her. Her whole body started to shake as she began to laugh. She hadn’t laughed this hard in a long while, and began to turn red as her breathing became obstructed by her laughter spasms. Diminutive tears began to fall down her face.
Jamie stared at her, perplexed by Willow’s reaction. “Geez, it wasn’t *that* funny.”
“Oh my god.” Willow was able to pant in between laughs. If only Jamie knew the emotional roller coaster she’d been on the last couple of days and how this was a much needed break. “That was hilarious.” She said as Jamie smiled lightly even though she shook her head at the same time. Willow controlled herself and sighed. She reached over for Jamie’s hand and stood up. “Come on, sweetie. Let’s have us some chocolate.”
As they stepped away from the steps into the cabin, Jamie stared Willow down, “I knew you guys wouldn’t throw out the candy you took from us.”
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TBC...
