|
|
Note: This hasn't been beta-ed, cuz I'm being an impatient arse, so blame any and all mistakes on me.. cheers  Chapter 7: Bloody ReunionsPart C "Maybe this wasn't such a good idea," Tara said quietly as she opened the door to the motel room. She walked three steps forward and found herself standing in the middle of the small room. She didn't have to look around to notice the lacking accommodations. Tara took in the double bed to her right, pushed up against the far wall, with light brown covers and matching drapes that covered the window hanging on the wall next to it. There was an open cabinet at the foot of the bed, with an old TV on top. And that was it. Tara cringed slightly, not looking forward to spending the night here. But then again, she had spent many nights in places much, much worse than this, and she had Willow by her side now—Willow who made all things better and brighter. "Well, I think it's a little late to change your mind," Buffy said and walked past her friend. She looked closely at the bed covers before sitting down on the bed. "We've already paid and all." She bounced a little on the bed and smiled. "Ohh, bouncy." "Yeah," Willow agreed as she stepped in last, and closed the door. She turned the dead bolt and locked the chain. "Besides, it's the only motel in town baby...where else could we go?" Tara turned from Buffy and looked at Willow, her feeling of hesitation becoming stronger. "No, I mean...being here. Not here in this room, but here here, in this town here." More quietly, she said: "Meeting my family."
"Oh," Willow and Buffy said at the same time and shared a look. Willow cleared her throat and stepped away from the door towards Tara. She gently held Tara's hands and pulled them to her lips, kissing both her knuckles. "I don't blame you for having second thoughts baby. But are you sure you wanna leave?"
Tara shrugged her shoulders and pulled a little on Willow's hands, needing to feel the other girl closer. "I don't know," she said quietly, more to herself than anyone else. "I don't know if..." she trailed off and turned her head to look at Buffy. "I don't um..."
"You want me to leave you guys alone?" Buffy asked, seeing how uncomfortable Tara was.
Tara shook her head, and released Willow's hands to turn around more fully. "no...that's not...um, no. Please don't go. I'm just..." she shrugged again and looked down on the floor for a second, before bending her knees and dropping down to the floor, taking a seat next to the open cabinet. She leaned up against the wall behind her and crossed her legs in front of her. Willow was quick to pick up two pillows off the bed and hand one to Tara, as she took a seat next to her. They both placed the pillows behind their backs at the same time and leaned up against the wall more comfortably. Buffy almost smiled at the synchronicity.
Tara took a deep breath and tried to clear her mind. Too many thoughts were fighting for supremacy at the moment and she desperately needed to sort them out. Willow and Buffy sat still, waiting patiently for the other girl to speak.
"I'm not quite sure if I'm as ready as I thought I was," Tara finally said, quiet yet seemingly composed. "I thought I could face them, you know. I want to face them. To tell them that I know what they did. But also to tell them I'm okay now...I'm better than okay now, no thanks to them."
Willow smiled, sad but proud at the same time. "And that's good right? That you want to tell them that."
Tara nodded, "I think so. I just...don't...think I can." Tara said and started to turn her head towards Willow.
"Oh." Willow looked down quickly when she saw Tara move. She knew her expression held the slight disappointment she felt and she didn't want her girlfriend to see it.
Tara noticed Willow's reticence to face her, and did her best to hold back the tears. She knew she was being a coward. And so did Willow. "I just...I don't know what's going to happen Will. If I tell them and they don't believe me, and then he'll..." Tara sniffled and drew her knees up. She hugged them close, resting her forehead on top of them. "I'm not ready," she admitted.
Willow looked up at Buffy, her green eyes, shining with unshed tears, clearly showing the struggle she was going through. Buffy gave her a sympathetic smile, but shrugged her shoulders subtly, helpless, as she knew it wasn't her place to speak right now.
Willow nodded at Buffy, knowing it was her own turn. She processed her thoughts quickly, knowing she had to, and as she did, she placed an arm around Tara's shoulder and drew her close. "That's...uh...That's okay baby." As much as Willow wanted to help Tara face her family—as much as she wanted to stand face to face with those bastards that supposedly shared genes with Tara and spit in their faces—her protective instincts came out on top, and she knew she'd choose whatever Tara wanted, to keep her safe. "If you're not ready, you're not ready. Maybe some other time, huh? Whatever you wanna do, whenever you wanna do it. It's your call." She pulled Tara even closer and kissed her temple. "Okay?" She felt Tara nod her head and smiled briefly, although not completely happy with the situation. Just as long as you're safe.
"Um," Buffy said and Willow looked up and gave her friend a questioning look. Buffy bit on her left thumb nail as she tried to find the words she needed to say. She'd listen sympathetically to Tara, going through the motions with her, and biting her tongue until she knew she had to say something. Buffy had faced enough demons in her life, real or not, to know exactly what Tara was going through. And she'd been afraid as well, not feeling like she was ready or strong enough to face them. She understood exactly where Tara was coming from, and why she wanted to leave. But judging by her experiences, Buffy knew running away was the last thing Tara should do. She'd wanted to run away from the Master, and Angel...Angelus, and even after stabbing...No. Buffy shook her head. That was one demon she hadn't faced yet, and she smiled slightly, the irony was not lost on her. She took a deep breath, knowing what she had to say.
"Look, Tara..." she started and stood up from the bed to take a seat in front of the two girls on the floor. With Anya's comments the day before, in the forefront of her mind, she continued. "I think I know why you want to run away, and I get it...I really do. But I don't think it's the um, right...thing to do."
"Buffy!" Willow hissed and glared at her friend, throwing a protective arm around Tara, and pulling her into a full hug. Buffy winced effortlessly and lifted her hands up. "I'm sorry...Will, just hear me out okay. I think I actually have a point to make."
"It's okay sweetie," Tara whispered and gave Willow a nudge on the shoulder. She looked up at Buffy, smiling shyly, a faint glimmer of hope in her eyes. "Please continue."
"You're afraid right? Of your brother...and father?" Buffy said hesitantly, not wanting to overstep her boundaries. Tara looked down immediately, hiding behind her hair and Buffy waited a second to see Tara nod her head. "Because they...hurt...you?" she said softly and placed a gentle hand on Tara's knee. Again Tara nodded slightly and Willow tensed at the final confirmation. "What?" she whispered, not wanting to accept it but having no choice. "They..." she sucked in her breath as the delicate dam she'd been building out of denial and ignorance burst quickly and forcefully. Willow swallowed repeatedly as she tried to hold the lump in her throat down. She tightened her hold on Tara and buried her face in Tara's hair, hoping the faint scent of Tara's herbal shampoo mixed with pure Tara would help her find the strength she needed right now.
"It's okay," Tara whispered but Willow shook her head. "It will never be okay."
Buffy held back her own tears, and moved further back, wanting to give the two lovers in front of her more time. She clasped her hands in her lap and looked down, feeling a little overwhelmed.
Willow moved her head back a few moments later and Tara did the same. They gazed into each other's eyes, then leaned closer together and shared a sweet, loving kiss. "You're so beautiful, you know that?" Tara murmured when she pulled away and Willow smiled her thanks, blushing thinly as she blinked away more unshed tears. "I know," she whispered. "You show me, and I just know."
Not for the first time was Buffy rendered speechless as she witnessed once again the love that existed between Willow and Tara. If she didn't think her tear-filled eyes were playing tricks on her, she could have sworn they were practically glowing. She wiped her eyes discreetly and looked up, noticing both witches looking at her expectantly.
"What? I had something in my eye."
"Um, you were trying to tell me something?" Tara said with a smile, wanting to hear what the slayer had to say.
"Oh, right. So it's my turn again?" At Tara's nod Buffy cleared her throat. "Right...where was I? Oh." Buffy frowned, not wanting to bring this up. "I can't begin to imagine what it must feel like Tara. To be um, hurt, by someone who's supposed to be your family." Tara and Willow both frowned, but Buffy kept going. "And I am so, so sorry you had to go through that. No one deserves that, least of all someone as kind and amazing as you."
Despite her resurfacing anger, Willow couldn't help smiling softly at Buffy's words. Darn tootin' she's amazing!
"But I do know what it is to be afraid. So afraid you can't breathe or move or do anything but wait. It's a horrible feeling, and I hate myself when I feel it, cuz it makes me feel weak..." The slayer swallowed audible, her eyes closing for a brief moment. Then she smiled weakly, "and hello, slayer here, I'm not supposed to feel weak." Buffy joked, trying to lighten the mood a little. It didn't work.
Buffy sighed and looked down in her lap. "What I'm trying to say is...I've faced hundreds of demons and I'm afraid every time it happens. But just as I'm about to run away, something inside me says 'you have to face this Buffy, or it will haunt you for the rest of your life.'" Buffy paused, letting her words sink in. "It kinda sounds like Giles actually, but that's beside the point..."
Tara actually chuckled a little at that and looked up at Buffy. "So what you're saying is I should go home and face my father or I'll regret it for the rest of my life."
"Um, yeah." Buffy nodded.
"I think you're right." Tara smiled thankfully. Buffy smiled back. She didn't often hear that. Then she smiled sheepishly. "I probably shouldn't have used so many words huh? I blame Willow..."
"Hey!" Willow exclaimed, who was by that time smiling proudly at both her girls; Buffy for helping Tara and Tara for accepting that help. Sometimes that's the hardest thing to do, Willow mused. "I don't use many words..." she argued. Both Buffy and Tara gave her a 'are you kidding me' look and she started backtracking. "Okay, okay...but I don't use many words often. Um, sometimes?" Willow sighed, "Seldom?"
Tara laughed and kissed Willow's cheek. "I'll give you seldom."
***
Few minutes later Buffy had stepped through the door leading to the adjoining room and said her goodnights. Willow and Tara got ready for bed quickly; both feeling physically and mentally exhausted. Glad in shorts and pajamas, they stood in front of the unmade bed and stared.
"You think it looks okay?"
"I don't know sweetie. It doesn't look not okay...but um, looks can be deceiving and all that."
"And all that, yeah." Willow took a hesitant step towards the bed and placed a hand on the mattress, pushing it down. "They feel clean." She shrugged her shoulders and climbed onto the mattress, lying down on her side. "Speaking of, when they say 'and all that' what do you think they're referring to? What were you just referring to?"
Tara shrugged, "it's just a saying, I guess." She climbed in after Willow and lay down next to her, pulling the covers over them as she did.
"Right, but don't you ever wonder about it? And all that...do you think it refers to all other words that mean the same as, well, in this case, deceiving? Like could I say 'looks can be deceiving and misleading and deluding and beguiling' etc and it would mean the same?"
Tara smiled, loving the way Willow's mind would work. Always wondering. "Um, I suppose so. I think 'all that' means everything of that kind, so yeah, I think it's just a short way of combining things that mean the same."
"That's what I was thinking." Willow rolled onto her back and held her arm out for Tara who smiled and settled her head comfortably on Willow's shoulder. She yawned and closed her eyes, feeling more than ready for bed. Willow, as tired as she was, had other plans, however. "So?" she asked.
"So?" Tara echoed and looked up briefly.
"So don't you think it's time you told me about your family?"
Tara's face fell and a deep frown settled over her features. "Oh."
"Yes, oh. Tara, please...tell me. I want to know. I need to know."
Tara sighed and nodded her head. She knew it was time. "Well, I guess it started when I was six..."
"Six?!" Willow interrupted, perturbed with that information. "But you were just a kid," she argued weakly; knowing whatever she had to say wouldn't change the past.
"I know," Tara whispered and closed her eyes.
***
13 years ago
"Mama, mama, mama!" A six-year-old Tara ran into the old estate and bounced into the kitchen. "I'm magic!" she exclaimed, and her wide smile lit up the entire room.
Margaret Maclay smiled happily at her baby girl and put down the oranges she was slicing. She bent her knees and faced the happy child. "Well, I know you're magic sweetheart," she said and playfully swiped her daughters nose with her index finger. "You've always been my lil' magical angel."
"No, mama," Tara giggled and swiped at her mama's finger, "not that kinda magic." Her bright blue eyes looked from left to right before she leaned closer to the older woman and whispered quietly: "I mean real magic."
"Real magic?" Margaret whispered back and dropped back on her haunches. She smiled weakly at her daughter, her eyes clearly troubled, though she tried to hide it.
Tara nodded and climbed into her mother's lap, wrapping her little arms around her neck. "Like fixing people magic mama."
"What do you mean sweetheart?" Margaret questioned, wondering what kind of magical abilities her daughter must have inherited, yet wishing to the goddess it wasn't so.
"Well, me and Jimmy were climbing up the trees in Mr. White's yard to get peaches when he fell down and hurt is hand and he was crying and I didn't know what to do so I gave him a hug like you do when I hurt and then I touched his hand gently and gave it a kiss and he stopped crying and said his hand was all better now." Tara finally took a breath and smiled proudly at her mother. "Did I do good?"
Margaret laughed and nodded her head to her daughter. "Yes, sweetie, you did real good." Phew, she thought to herself and sent a silent thank you to the goddess. "It was really good of you to help Jimmy until he felt better. Was his hand hurt real bad?"
"Oh yes mama!" Tara nodded vigorously. "He had a big owie in his palm and there was all this blood but when I touched it all just went away. And, and, and," she said excitedly, "now he's all good."
"Oh." Margaret was speechless; her eyes wide open in surprise. She was expecting a 'yes, he had a tiny scratch on his finger’ kind of a story...not 'mending flesh in seconds' kind of a story. She hugged her daughter tight to her chest and looked out the kitchen window. What am I going to do?
***
"And that was the first time you did magic?" Willow asked for clarification. Tara nodded and looked up at Willow. "What are you thinking?"
"I'm thinking..." Willow said before she rolled to her side to face Tara. "I'm thinking that you are way more powerful than you let on. I mean, healing people at six? Just how powerful are you?"
***
In the other room Buffy paced around aimlessly, swinging her hands in the air. She jumped up and down, loosened her neck a few hundred times and even walked around the room on her hands. She looked like a lion in a gage. Desperate for a...
"Man I need a good lay...Slay! Slay, I meant slay." Buffy corrected her own mumble. "Although..." She shook her head and dropped down on the floor and started doing pushups. "One Mississippi, two Mississippi, three Mississippi... where's another slayer when you need one. Sparring would be so good right about now."
***
11 years ago
"Daddy!"
Jack Maclay spun around at the sound of his daughter's voice and smiled widely when he noticed his 8-year-old girl come running towards him at breakneck speed. He put down his briefcase and held is arms open for Tara to jump into.
"There's my little girl," he said sweetly and hugged his daughter tight to his chest, spinning the two of them around in circles.
"I missed you daddy. Where have ya been?" Tara whispered, burying her face in the crook of her father's neck. The faint scent of Old Spice on her daddy always soothed her and she sighed happily. Her daddy was home.
"I'm sorry honey, but daddy had to do some work away from here. But I'm back now."
Tara nodded and hugged her daddy tighter. She wouldn't let him go for the world.
"So where's your mama?" Jack asked as he walked them up to the house. He looked around the farm and noticed all the animals were inside. Parts of the fence were broken and the big red barn could really use with a new coat of paint. He smiled, looking forward to working again with his family.
"She's inside daddy. I think she's making pancakes."
"Pancakes? At five in the afternoon? What is she thinking?" Jack said, with a teasing tone and Tara giggled. "I think she's thinking that you are probably missing her pancakes more than anything."
"But that's ridiculous," Jack said continuing with his teasing as he opened the door to the house. "Her pancakes aren't anything to brag about. Why do you think I always want bacon with mine?" Tara shrugged. "To have something to wash down the pancakes with."
"Daddy!" Tara laughed. "Don't let mama hear you say that…she'll be mad."
"Oh, that's too late now sweetheart." Margaret stepped out of the kitchen, a spatula in one hand and a pan in the other. She mock-glared at the pair.
"Oops." Jack and Tara said at the same time and smiled sheepishly.
"Well, don't just stand there. Come on you two," Margaret nodded her head towards the kitchen and turned on her heels, "Donnie should be down any minute."
Jack and Tara followed at a sedated pace, giggling to themselves and eventually joined Margaret in the kitchen. Jack put Tara down on the kitchen counter and walked over to his wife and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "And how are you darling?"
Margaret turned to her husband and gave him a lopsided smile. "Things are looking up."
Tara looked down smiling, feeling almost shy around her parents at that moment. Then she heard Donnie come running down the stairs and her smile widened.
"Hey squirt," Donnie said when he bounced into the kitchen. He ruffled Tara's hair playfully, and tickled her sides making her laugh. Then he saw the new addition to the kitchen.
"Dad? You're back!"
"Yup," Tara nodded, happy as a clown.
***
"Um, the same Donnie we met tonight?" Willow said skeptically.
Tara nodded, "yeah, the same one. Seems hard to believe doesn't it?"
"Very. Did your dad know about magic?"
"Yeah, he did. And it didn't bother him, if anything he was proud. Donnie was too. They wanted to learn how to practice magic with mom and I. Things were great for a while. I was happy. We were all happy. But then it changed."
"What changed?"
***
6 years ago
"Are you sure you two will be alright? I know Scout's been complaining lately, I can hear him. I can stay behind and help with the healing process."
"Margaret, darling..." Jack stepped closer to his wife and took both of her hands in his. "We'll be fine. Scout's coming along great, and what he needs right now is some rest and a whole lotta hay."
Margaret chuckled and looked towards the barn enclosure, where her horse Scout was chewing on fresh hay. His front left leg was wrapped in white bandage with two wooden splinters on each side, where a rock had cut into him after a fall, fracturing his bone in the process. She and Tara had spent 3 weeks performing healing rituals and prayers in hope that Scout would come out of his injuries alive and well. The bone had mended well for the most part, still weak in some parts, and Margaret was convinced a week more of rituals would make him right as rain again. Unfortunately she had a meeting with her coven in a day, and had been requested to bring Tara with her, for her daughter's witch trials, and hopefully by the end, her acceptance into the coven.
"Yeah mama," Tara said as she walked up to her parents, carrying a heavy book bag on her back and a stuffed dolphin under her arms. "Dad can take care of Scout. And Donnie will be home in two days, he'll be able to help as well."
Jack nodded at his wife and smiled, his eyes wide as he tried to convince her. Tara blinked her big blue eyes innocently and smiled brightly to her mom as well. "Please, can we just go? Please? Please, please, please?"
Margaret couldn't resist the pair and rolled her eyes. "Oh, alright. You two always gang up on me. It's far from being fair."
"Yay!" Tara squealed quietly and ran towards their blue pickup truck. She opened the passenger door quickly and jumped in, closing the door behind her.
Margaret rolled her eyes again and bent down to pick up her bag. "No running or exercising yet, the bone is still soft in some places. Any jumping might displace it."
"I know, I know. I'll walk him around the enclosure a few times then put him inside. He'll be safe."
***
"Horses?" Willow squeaked out, her muscles tensing up at the thought. "You had horses? Like teeth that could take your arms off horses?"
"Uhmm...yes? We still do...I think." Tara answered hesitantly; unsure of why Willow was so agitated all of a sudden. "Are you okay? And by the way, most horses don't like arm very much."
"I had a bad birthday party pony experience when I was 4. I see horses and I see really big ponies."
Tara smiled sympathetically and gave Willow a quick kiss. "You should ride with me sometime, I promise safety and fun."
"Uhh..."
"Which is totally up to you, of course." Tara amended, seeing the fear in Willow's eyes.
"Oh good." Willow exhaled, relieved. "So anyway...you were saying?"
"Well, me and mama went to the coven meeting, and I spent a week preparing for the trials. The trials themselves took 3 nights and afterwards, there were 3 nights of celebration and initiation. So when we came home, we'd be gone for 2 weeks." Tara paused, a shiver running down her back, as the memory of their homecoming rushed to her. "You wouldn't believe how much things had changed."
TBC
x Tinna Karen
"You're not gonna jokey-rhyme your way outta this one." - Willow in Pangs
|
|
Login
FAQ
Search
. And you two are so frigging adorable 
I'm buried in work...but it was worth it!! 
Not like I would've accomplished much anyways. 
