*Drakkenfyre* - hope you got my e-mail. Work has still not slwed down though so there may be a bit of wait until the next chapter
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*Puff* - Thanks so much. Hope you like the my take on 'Family'.
Spoiler Warning - It starts from Seeing Red and then completely veers off in all kinds of tangents. It covers both the Buffy and Angel universe for now.
Disclaimer - All characters, names and some dialogue etc belong to ME and Joss Whedon. However, due to improper usage and gross mishandling of characters and plot lines by aforementioned parties, it is with great pleasure that I (and all the other writers on the board) use them for the reading pleasure of kittens everywhere.
Rating - PG again
Feedback - Yes please. If you like the story or not or want to see something else happening. Feedback's nice and always appreciated
Notes - Well, on with the story and no more smut. This is my take on the 'Family'. Again, the story kinda took off into a direction I wasn't quite expecting but hopefully it's ok. Thanks for reading.
Title : I Dream of Thee
Chapter 6b
"Ohmygod!, ohmygod!, ohmygod! You made pancakes." Dawn's squeal of delight and dancing around the kitchen warmed Tara's heart and although she had wanted to stay in bed with Willow a bit longer, seeing Dawn so happy made up for it slightly.
"Yeah, Dawnie and Tara made funny shapes as well the smiley face ones." Willow was still daydreaming of their shower together when she heard Dawn's delighted shout. It was such a domestic scene with Tara stacking the huge number of pancakes they had made onto plates and Willow pouring out the juice and milk. Now all they needed was a horde of hungry Demon fighters, and right on cue, Angel, Wesley, Cordelia and Gunn entered the kitchen. Dawn had given off another squeal of delight and ran up the stairs to drag Buffy down for Willow and Tara's special pancakes.
"Man if we ate like this every morning, I wouldn't ever want to go back." Gunn was already helping himself to a whole stack of the pancakes and avoiding Wesley's reach at the same time.
"Quite right. These are incredibly delicious." Wesley had given up trying to get any off Gunn's plate and instead took Cordelia's stack as she went to get some orange juice.
"Hey! Watch it Mister! I have hurt people for less serious offences than stealing breakfast." Cordelia snatched her plate back and immediately started eating in order to discourage any further theft.
Angel loved the camaraderie of the situation, but he was slightly miffed as none of them ever praised his breakfast making skills this much. "Ahem…I have been known to make a mean scrambled eggs," he mumbled.
"Oh, Yeah, Angel….", "Good eggs", "Definitely, man" came the chorus of replies that really didn't convince Angel all that much but at least Willow was more understanding.
"You can't underestimate the power of Tara's hot…" Willow's eyes following Tara as she walked from the stove to the table, "…cakes," she finished and turned back to Angel and smiled roguishly, happy at her double entendre.
He smiled back. Willow's happiness was heartening to see and though his own heart ached at the fact that he and Buffy could not be, seeing another couple so in love just made his own sacrifices a little more bearable.
"I was told that there are pancakes for hungry slayers." Buffy announced as she walked into the kitchen, her arm around Dawn's thin shoulders. Previously, she had never made such overt gestures of sisterly affection. It wasn't that Buffy never considered Dawn her sister but more that she always knew in the back of her mind that Dawn had been a gift and one that could easily be taken away. So she had tried not to get to close, but she had anyway and when Dawn's life had been threatened, Buffy willingly sacrificed her own so that Dawn and all her loved ones could live. Now that she was back, she wanted to make it up to Dawn, to show that she was sorry for her initial behavior as well as be the sister and mother that Dawn needed.
"Buffy!" Willow couldn't help but smile at the sight of her best friend, alive and whole. "Yes, many pancakes for everyone. We're like the International House of pancakes for Demon Fighters…I'm still working on the name."
Buffy grinned at Willow as she too joined in the fray to snatch as many of the newly made pancakes as possible before Gunn ate them all.
Dawn wanted the peace and happiness to last for as long as possible. Despite not being around for more than three years, she always remembered scenes like this. But the monks had been accurate in the planting of memories and she also remembered that the scenes were always followed by badness. It would always start out the same way, everyone would be gathered for breakfast, joking and laughing only to have the mood change because of something or another. In LA, it was a phonecall from the principal of Hemery saying that Buffy was expelled. Later the calls were from their father saying he would not be coming home that morning or ever again. In Sunnydale, breakfast was normally interrupted by the necessity to tend to Buffy's wounds after she came back from a night of Demon fighting or just waiting around for her to come back at all. Last year alone, they had more or less decided not to have breakfast anymore, after their mom collapsed when making eggs for them. However things seemed different now and Dawn wanted it to stay that way. She was sure that the news she was going to share would ensure this and decided that she wouldn't keep it a secret for much longer.
"Hey, guys…" Dawn saw everyone look at her expectantly and so she continued, knowing in her heart that it would be such a good surprise. "Well, I, er…see, I know we all can't stay together like this and even though I really want it to be this way, it can't." She saw Angel's stricken look and quickly added "But LA is not that far and there's e-mail and the phone and Buffy said I could learn to drive."
"I so did not." Buffy shook her head, "As in no way and over my dead body and by that, I mean no way."
"Ooookay, we'll talk about it later. Anyway, I don't think you guys should go back to LA yet as I gotintouchwithTara'sfamilyandthey'recomingheretoseeher." Dawn finished in a rush as she pulled out a letter from her back pocket and waved it in the air.
"What?" Tara nearly dropped the spatula and pan she was holding. She hoped that she had heard wrong but despite the speed in which Dawn had delivered the news, she fully understood the implications. Somehow, Dawn had remembered her talking about her family and had got in touch with them. Apparently, they had replied and were now coming to Sunnydale to confirm her worst fears.
"Tara's family? Coming here?… How did you…" Willow was taken aback. She didn't even know that Tara still remembered anything and wondered how Dawn had found them. It was good news though, she hoped. If Tara were more comfortable about her past, she would then concentrate more on their future together.
"Well, in the Magic Box before you guys came in to discuss Buffy's…Before that, Tara mentioned her family name and that she remembered that she lived in Benson, Arizona. So I went online and did a search and then used one of Willow's programs to hack into their city hall records and found out the address of the Maclays. It's a small town and there was only one listing. I called and spoke to your dad. He didn't believe me at first and hung up but then I got this letter a few days ago and well, they're coming and by the looks of it are going to arrive soon." Dawn looked around, pleased to see that though everyone looked surprised, there were tentative smiles around.
"That was rather resourceful of you and we would definitely stay a bit longer and meet Tara's family." Wesley replied. Cordelia and Gunn were nodding their assent.
Tara felt as if she couldn't breathe. Her vision was starting to blur and she knew that if she didn't take a breath soon, she was going to faint. This was all happening too soon. She loathed to ruin Dawn's happiness so she took a shallow breath and smiled weakly. She was frightened that Willow would pick up on her fears as well so she decided that perhaps it would be best if she didn't go near Willow for the rest of the day. "Um, I…I g-g-guess I should go and get ready or, or something..." With that, she put down the pan and swiftly walked out of the kitchen, leaving a very confused Willow and Dawn in her wake.
Buffy looked at Angel then. Out of all the people there, she knew that he would have picked up on the weirdness that had just happened. Dawn's announcement had elicited a joyous response from everyone there except for Tara. Her hasty exit and pale features were not a good sign and but since Buffy still did not know Tara all that well, she just kept quiet and hoped that Angel would say something. She had been rather surprised to see the rooming arrangements and the affection that both Willow and Tara had for each other. She had only been dead six weeks or thereabouts and suddenly, Willow had a new girlfriend whom she knew nothing about. It was obvious that Tara was well liked by everyone, especially Dawn. Buffy wasn't jealous of that but she was just wary of newcomers. She knew that she would always be able to rely on the original Scooby core but the people that came after tended to leave. Angel, Cordelia, Oz, they all left eventually and for Willow's sake, Buffy hoped that Tara would not follow that path, which was why the blonde's reaction was slightly disturbing.
Willow was sure something just happened but for the life of her, she couldn't figure out what. She was beginning to appreciate how Xander felt at most Scooby meetings. The one thing that struck her was Tara's hasty exit. She could understand how news of seeing one's family after five years of being stuck in a Demon Dimension could be unsettling but she was also sure that this was what Tara had wanted. Their talk this morning about wondering what Tara's mother looked like and seeing her family led Willow to believe that Tara needed to confront her past. "I…I should go and see if she needs me."
"Wait." Angel suddenly remembered where he had seen the look on Tara's face before. It was when Lorne's clan brought her out to be beheaded. That was the look she wore then. It was as if she resigned herself to dying and had given up. "There's still some more batter left. You might as well finish it and make some more for Dawn. I'll go see if Tara needs any help." He pleaded with Willow internally to just let it go and was glad to see her relent and nod her head.
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Angel couldn't hear any noise emanating from Willow and Tara's room but he knew that Tara was inside so he knocked softly and let himself in. Immediately, he noticed some of the clothes that Cordelia had given Tara and the ones that Willow had bought for her, strewn on the bed. Tara looked at him when he walked in and he could tell that she was trying so hard to not let her fear and anxiety show. He wanted to help but first he needed to know what was wrong. By all measures, having your family drop by for a visit wasn't exactly the end of the world.
"Going somewhere?" Angel decided that the best way to deal with the situation was to get the story out of Tara. So he sat at the edge of the bed, putting himself between Tara and the door and waited for her answer.
Tara wasn't sure why she was reacting this way. She knew that she would eventually have to face her family and her past but she had wanted to do it on her terms and only after discussing it with Willow. Now, things were changing too fast and all she could think about was that she didn't want to know about her past just yet. Maybe it was better not to know and just talk to Willow about it and deal with it then. "I…I just want to know…"
Angel didn't say anything, he could see Tara trying to gather her thought and decided to wait for her.
"Is reality so much better than perception? I mean, if you think that you're good then can't you be…even if deep down you're not? I think I'm good…"
"Tara, I don't understand but I can sense you're frightened of something. All I can say is that you have nothing to fear. As long as I'm here or Buffy or Willow… we'll always be here for you." He reached out to touch her shoulder.
Tara wanted to shy away from Angel's touch. She didn't deserve to be comforted, not if she was hiding such a huge secret, and one that could ultimately hurt Willow and the rest. But a part of her was still hopeful. "It's just…When I first got to Pylea, I wanted to get back so badly, but I couldn't. Then things got so bad and all I wanted to do was to forget about my life on earth so that I wouldn't have a basis of comparison. If I didn't remember my life on earth, the collar and the beatings would seem less bad." Tara finished softly, tears forming in her eyes.
"You will never have to face that or go back." Angel was at a loss. Tara seemed so lost and wanted affirmation of some kind but it was obvious that his words were not helping. "Tara, don't you want to see your family?"
He could the uncertainty in her eyes and wondered what had placed it there. He needed to know what she was afraid of so that he and the rest could help.
"I just want to be good…"Tara replied, her voice breaking at the end as she lowered her face, unwilling to look at Angel anymore.
"But you are!" Angel unwavering in his reply. It was the truth and Tara had to see that.
"I didn't want to remember being on Earth when I was in Pylea but I would still dream… I couldn't control my dreams and in them, things were so good. I dreamt of being happy and loved and it was like a fairytale. Then I was rescued and…"
"I wasn't exactly Prince Charming was I ?…Trying to attack you and my friends." Angel's own guilt kicked in then and it made Tara sad. These people that she had met and come to love over the past months were so good and noble. Yet all of them carried such guilt and responsibility and it was unfair. They deserved better and she hoped, she did too.
"No, Angel, it wasn't you. I just dreamt about being rescued so many times and when it happened, that seemed like a dream too. Then coming back here, I started dreaming about people I think were my family. Only the dreams were more like nightmares because I…I don't think I'm good. In them, I seem to be…What if…what if because of all the bad things in Pylea, I just made up my dreams there to take me away from it all, but in reality, deep down, I'm really evil and so is my family." She had said it. Tara finally gave voice to her greatest fear and waited for Angel's look of horror and disgust but there was none. Instead, he stood up, walked over to her and embraced her, tucking her head beneath his chin and pulling her in tight.
Tara had not expected that and she didn't expect to hear Angel's ensuing words either.
"You're not evil. I
know what evil is. I live with it inside of me everyday and it does not recognize what's in you. You're not evil. Even if you don't believe it, I do." Angel could feel Tara begin to relax in his arms and sighed in relief. He didn't need proof for his words for he believed them fully. The brave young woman in his arms could never be evil, he would bet his soul on it. He could see so clearly now, how Willow had fallen so hard for Tara. She exuded such grace and beauty that one had to be blind not to see it.
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"Do you think they're ok up there?" Willow had been hovering at the base of the stairs for the past hour wondering if she should go up or not. It was not easy for her to know that something wasn't right and yet not be able to fix it immediately. It was just that it was how she viewed life and problems. If something was wrong and it was in her power to fix it, she would do it. Most of the time, it worked in her favor but sometimes, Willow never thought about the consequences and repercussions. Like in bringing Buffy back, the joy permeating the house and worn on the face of everyone there was immeasurable and she knew deep down that it was worth any price. However, the full extent of the price was yet to be revealed and Willow hoped that like this minor problem with Tara, it too would be solved in the end, with minimal casualties.
"Hey Will, I really don't know Tara that well on account of me being dead and all, but I know Angel and they'll be fine." Buffy could see that Willow was quite distressed and she wanted to offer comfort. It was always easier for her to sublimate her own problems and deal with the larger issues. Right now, it was obvious that Tara's family coming for a visit was not happy news for the blonde. Buffy just wished that Dawn didn't feel so bad about it. Her sister had been sitting on the sofa with a sad expression, looking at Willow pacing up and down. Buffy knew that Willow didn't intentionally want to make Dawn feel bad but her obliviousness to Dawn's distress was also not good. "Maybe you should talk to Dawn?" Buffy tentatively asked softly.
Willow looked up, startled at the question. Suddenly, she realized the implications and immediately looked towards the young girl. Dawn was dejectedly looking out the window and picking at the frayed threads on the cuff of her jeans. Willow immediately berated herself internally. In all her worry about Tara, she had ignored Dawn and probably led the teen to believe that Willow held her responsible for the current situation. If she couldn't help Tara right now, she should at least be able to help Dawn. "Hey Dawnie, that was a good idea finding Tara's family. It really was. You did nothing wrong."
"Then why is she upstairs crying or worse?" Dawn was glad that Willow was still talking to her. She had been so frightened that she had truly screwed up and that both Willow and Tara were angry.
"I guess, it was just a surprise, is all. I mean she never talks about Pylea but it was really bad for her there."
"Way, way bad, I mean it was so bad, there isn't a scale for it." Cordelia added.
"Yeah, and I guess, she's just worried about how her family will react to that and to her. I think she just needs time." Willow sat next to Dawn and patted her on her knee. She sounded so sure but internally, she was just hoping that would be the case.
"Well, I'm really not sure about how much time Tara needs but it can't be too long on account of a trailer just pulled up into the driveway and if my eyesight doesn't betray me, it has Arizona plates, I believe." Wesley looked pointedly at Gunn. He didn't feel too comfortable with the situation and knew that for the time being, it was better to be on alert.
All of them heard the doorbell chime and were reluctant to answer it. In the end, Buffy decided that they had to face the situation sooner or later and swung open the door. "Hi, I'm Buffy. Come in." She stepped aside allowing the three strangers entry. At least it was daylight and therefore she didn't have to worry that they were Vampires. "So you must be the er…, the um, the MacDonalds?"
"Maclays, You're the Maclays… You're Tara's family." Willow offered, hoping Buffy's mispronunciation went unnoticed.
Yes we are. Is she here? We were told Tara would be here." The man who answered looked like Tara's dad. His craggy features were pinched but Willow could see some similarity with her love, especially in his blue eyes. The other two people there also looked like they were related to Tara. However, they did not look too friendly. The young woman wasn't really making eye contact but the young man was looking around defiantly. Willow didn't like the fact that his hands were in fists at his side and he had not even nodded his acknowledgement at their greeting.
"We'd like to see Tara now." The man stated again.
"We're
friends of Tara's." Like Wesley, Gunn was feeling ill at ease and the feeling was compounded by the actual presence of Tara's so called family. "She should be down soon. In the meantime, why don't you take the load off and sit." It wasn't so much as an invitation then a command couched in civil tones but Gunn knew that he had put his point across. He didn't like the look that passed between the older man and his younger charge.
"I'll just go get some refreshments." Buffy called over her shoulder as she hurriedly went to the kitchen.
"I'll help." Cordelia echoed. She could tell that Buffy had sensed something and was anxious to know what.
Buffy had stopped just within the kitchen and immediately turned around to face Cordelia. "They're evil." She stated matter of factly.
"What? Really? They look kinda normal." Cordelia turned around and cautiously peeked out. She could see that the three new arrivals were now seated uncomfortably on the sofa. Willow and Dawn were trying to engage them in conversation but as far as Cordelia could tell, they were not responding too well.
"Well, I guess they could be evil. Are you sure it's not the after-effects of the spell. I mean you don't think we're still evil, do you?" Cordelia felt the hairs at the back of her neck prickle at the thought that Buffy could still be under the delusion that they were all still evil and just biding her time before she attacked.
"No…not really evil. I still think you're probably mean though. Listen, Cordy, I just have this feeling, you know." Buffy didn't know how else to phrase it. As a Slayer, she could always tell the good guys from the bad and all she knew was that Tara's family did not seem all that good.
"So, how long have you known Tara?" Willow wanted to hit the side of her head for asking such a stupid question. "I mean… was here, how long did you know Tara was here?"
"We received the call four days ago and drove here almost immediately. We want to see her." He was getting agitated and in turn, so was the younger man.
"She will be down shortly. I'm Wesley by the way. That's Charles Gunn, Willow and Dawn. Dawn is the young lady who called you. Buffy is her sister who opened the door and the other young woman in the kitchen helping her is Cordelia."
"I'm Tara's father and this is her brother Donny and her cousin, Beth. Now that we're all familiar like, why don't one of you run upstairs and get Tara for us."
Willow was torn between wanting to ask where Tara's mom was and taking the opportunity to go upstairs and see how Tara was doing. She barely noticed Donny getting up and only caught on to his arm when he carelessly brushed passed her to head to the stairs. "Hey, you can't just go up there."
"Better let go little girl or-"
"I don't think you really want to finish that sentence." Buffy's menacing voice could be heard from the kitchen as she slowly sauntered out, her hands on her hips.
Donny snatched his hand from Willow's grip and again tried to move pass her only to land flat on his back. He never saw what hit him but he knew the redhead had something to do with it as he looked up at her smirk.
Willow knew that she shouldn't have used magic, especially in front of strangers but she couldn't allow Donny to get pass. He seemed dangerous and she didn't want him anywhere near Tara. He was scrambling to his feet and she was going to warn him again but was distracted by the soft footfalls of Tara. She could sense her lover coming down the stairs and wished that Tara didn't have to witness her bullying her brother, no matter how much he deserved it.
"Tara?" Her father called out as he got up from the sofa and immediately went to the base of the staircase.
As soon as Tara had heard her name called out, she froze and Angel who had been walking behind her, bumped into her but steadied both of them when he grabbed hold of the banister. It was an impasse of sorts. Tara was frozen there, not wanting to go downstairs but she couldn't go back up either as Angel was behind her.
Willow could see the uncertainty and fear coloring Tara's features so she took matters into her own hands. She slowly ascended the stairs and when she reached the step Tara was on, she reached for the blonde's hand, and whispered the same word Tara had whispered to her when she needed it. "Courage."
Tara let out the breath she was holding and grabbed on tightly to Willow's hand as they both descended down the stairs and came face to face with her father. She recognized him from her hazy dreams and wanted to hug him but the way he held himself stopped her so she settled for acknowledging him instead. "Daddy?"
His nod at her question eased her mind slightly but he still looked so stern. "Tara, we should leave for home soon. We're glad that you're back but there are responsibilities to get back to. You should say your goodbyes…"
"I…I don't remember much…"Tara was surprised at the swiftness of everything. She had still not been introduced to the other two people there whom she recognized but could not place.
"Maybe…maybe we should talk first. Perhaps a walk?" Her father's features softened slightly but he still held himself so stiffly that Tara had to quash her desire to hug him.
Willow was following the conversation up to that point and was feeling more unsettled by the moment. All she could focus on was that Tara's father wanted to take her back and that he wanted to leave as soon as possible. He might even leave right after their talk and to Willow that was unacceptable. It was downright not going to happen. Tara belonged by her side, in Sunnydale. They had just found each other and to Willow what had transpired the night before was not an everyday occurrence. She had pledged her heart and made a commitment and thought that Tara had as well. She could see the doubt on Tara's face when her father suggested going for a walk and decided that she would go with, just to make sure nothing occurred. "I'll go with you." Willow stated as she stepped forward and took Tara's hand in hers, giving it an encouraging squeeze.
Tara felt so relieved to have Willow by her side but was taken aback by the scowl on the face of the young man who went to stand beside her father. "Hey sis, remember me? C'mon, no hug for you big brother, Donny? Or are you into other things now?" he indicated with disgust at their entwined hands.
"T-T-This is Willow, she's my…friend." Tara didn't know what else to say. It wasn't that she was embarrassed, but her brother and father did not seemed receptive to very many things and she didn't want them to reject Willow.
Willow knew that she shouldn't feel slighted at Tara's introduction. She could see the looks of incomprehension on Tara's father's face and the look of disgust on Donny's. So, she decided that it was best not to push the issue either. "Yes, we're good friends."
Donny knew what kind of friends they were and decided that enough was enough. They had driven across the state and all he wanted was to go back home with his sister in tow. She belonged to them and these new friends of hers had to understand that. So he grabbed hold of the redhead's arm, "I don't think my dad invited you." He added menacingly.
Willow could practically see the anger coming off Donny in waves and quelled her desire to use magic to teach him a lesson. She could feel his fingers tightening around her bony wrist but refused to give him the satisfaction of confirming that she was in pain. Luckily, Buffy could recognize the signs and swiftly grabbed Donny's other hand, twisted it expertly behind his back and stepped in close to whisper in his ear. "Let her go or you'll be walking out of here with one arm."
It was a stand-off of sorts but Donny refused to back down and wrenched at Willow's arm harder causing her to cry out. Buffy didn't like the fact that despite the position Donny was in, he had not heeded her advice and was about to take him down.
Cordelia knew that the scene was about to descend into chaos and if that happened, it would be even more difficult to sort through the mess and help Tara who was looking quite stricken. After Donny had grabbed hold of Willow, Tara had tried to intervene as well but her father's stern look and Buffy's timely presence prevented her from doing anything else except hold onto Willow's other hand. Cordelia decided that it was time she stepped in. "Arggggh…Oh God!" she screamed, grabbing her head in agony.
On cue, Angel, Wesley and Gunn rushed over to support Cordelia. Buffy and Donny were also distracted and Willow managed to pull her arm free as Tara placed herself between Donny and Willow. She looked at Buffy and calmly stated, "It's ok Buffy, you can let him go now. I…I don't think my b-b-brother is going to touch Willow anymore." She stared into his eyes then and made sure he understood her words. She could see anger and hatred there and despite not knowing the situation all that well, she knew that she was the cause for it and that it had been simmering there for a long, long time. Buffy was still unsure but Tara looked like she had a handle on the situation and so she let go.
"What the hell?" Tara's father was taken aback. The young woman seemed to be having a fit of some kind and his son was being manhandled by a little girl. "Listen, little girl, we just want to see Tara. We're her family and that gives us a right. Tara, why don't we take that walk right now. Alone." He directed the last word at Willow and moved to the door. Tara felt compelled to follow as she knew that her father would at least have some answers to the questions that were preying on her mind. Answers that she knew Willow deserved to know about. So, she ignored Donny as she turned and gave Willow a kiss. She didn't have any words then and hoped that the kiss was enough to convey her love and ask for Willow's understanding in the matter. She could see that Willow had closed her eyes as she leaned in. It gave her comfort that Willow still felt so safe with her despite seeing what her family was like. She could feel Willow sigh against her lips when she broke contact and she hoped that it would not be for long as she turned to follow her father.
Cordelia had stopped her act when she saw that Buffy had calmed down and Willow was no longer in the grip of Donny. As Wesley helped her up, she couldn't help whispering softly. "See, if you ever call me a third rate actress again." She could see Wesley smile back.
"Never third rate, Cordy and you are quite the Drama Queen." Wesley was thankful for Cordelia's quick thinking in averting a big blow up and it was Angel who had called her a third rate actress and only when he had reverted to Angelus that one time. Anyway, he was just glad that Cordy actually could act.
Dawn realized that the situation wasn't good. Tara's family didn't seem at all kind and good like Tara was. In fact, they gave her the creeps. She knew that she was fully responsible for what had happened and decided that perhaps she needed to do more. "I think I'm gonna go up to my room." With that, Dawn left her sister and the rest downstairs, looking warily at each other. She really didn't want to eavesdrop on any private conversation between Tara and her dad but she had to ensure that Tara would be safe. So she went to her room, opened the window and started climbing down. She was thankful that Buffy had never gotten round to cutting down the trellis. She wanted to, but then their mother died and Glory stepped up her attacks and there was never enough time. She could see Tara and her dad walking side by side up ahead and slowly began to shadow them.
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"Where have you been? Five years Tara, and not a word. Even now, it wasn't you who called."
The accusation in her father's voice cut at her. But how could she explain Pylea or how the experiences there branded her for life. She had been so lost and all the hurt and pain that occurred just perpetuated the feelings of isolation. "I’m s-s-sorry…I was so lost, daddy." Her small voice achingly fragile.
"But where were you?"
"Somewhere far away. I w-w-wanted to come back but I c-c-couldn't. Not until recently. The people back at the house, they saved me." She hoped that he would accept her explanation. She couldn't describe in detailed what happened in Pylea. That was relegated to the nightmares she had but thankfully those had stopped as well.
"Tara, five years and not a word."
"I wanted to so b-b-badly. Please believe me. I used to dream about you and Donny and …?" tara tried to recall the name of the young woman and her father could see the frustration on her face.
"Cousin Beth." He supplied. "Your cousin Beth has been living with us almost all your life."
"What about…I never dreamt of momma." Tara stopped walking and turned to face her father. She needed to know. She didn't want confirmation of what she thought for it would break her heart but she needed to know. As soon as she asked, she could see the emotions playing across her father's cragy features and knew before he said anything. "She's d-d-dead isn't she? I never dreamt of her because she's dead and I...I…" Tara wanted to say it, but then it would mean that she would have to face leaving Willow. She had survived so much and come so far but her current admission would take all of her courage. "I killed her, didn't I? I'm a, I’m a D-Demon and I killed her and t-t-that's why you never came looking for me." She didn't look up at him when she said it. It would be too painful to see the confirmation in his blue eyes. His pained silence was enough to confirm everything and Tara felt her heart break, shatter into a million pieces. She would never be able to be with Willow. She had killed her own mother and deserved to be in Pylea. With that last thought in her head and the feeling of loss in her heart, she turned and ran, leaving her father standing there, hands in his pockets and a look of regret on his face.
"What did you do?" Dawn's strident voice broke through to him as she ran up. She had not managed to hear all of the conversation between Tara and her father but the little she heard about Demons and death and the look on Tara's face when she had run off frightened Dawn. "What did you say to her?" Dawn demanded again.
"You don't know what you're dealing with, little girl." He knew that he should have said something, should have clarified and explained so that she would go home with them. But perhaps it was best this way. She would have to return now.
"I may be young, but you're the stupid one." Dawn stood in from of Tara's father daring him to contradict her. How could he be so blind she thought. "She has such a beautiful soul and I
know you can see it too. So why are you making her believe she's bad?" Dawn wanted to grab his shirt and make him answer. She could see Willow and Buffy running up the path and decided that strength in numbers would be good right about now.
Willow hadn't sat still since Tara had left with her father and her unease increased with time. It was only when Buffy placed a hand on her shoulder did she realize that she had almost been out the front door. Beth and Donny had gone back to their trailer, which was still parked on the lawn.
"If we leave via the back entrance, they won't be able to see us."
Willow nodded in relief. She didn't want to fight Buffy and thought that her best friend was going to stop her. They had made good time but were still surprised to see Dawn with Mr Maclay but Tara was no where in sight. Willow sprinted forward and even though she was nearly out of breath, she managed to get her question out.
"Where's…where's Tara?" She could see tears in Dawn's eyes and it wasn't a good sign. "If you've hurt her…" Willow grabbed hold of his shirt and lifted him up, "Where is she?" In most cases, threats from Willow never really carried much weight. She was too small and cute to lead anyone to believe she could actually do them harm. However, in this case, her black irises and low voice would have struck fear in the hearts of most demons.
Buffy skidded to a halt beside them, and nearly gasped at the change in her best friend. She could see the magic tendrils emanating from Willow but it was unlike the magic that her friend had practiced before. The magic she wielded now was more ominous and darker. "Will, he's not going to answer, if you choke him." She slowly touched Willow's arm and was glad to see her best friend let go and lower Mr Maclay to the ground.
"She ran away." Dawn told Willow. She wanted to hug her but she was afraid. Willow's transformation had scared her but she could see Willow's green eyes again so she told her about Tara instead. "He didn't stop her."
"Now hold on a minute, I love my daughter but you know nothing about our situation or what's going on." He knew that he should have probably held his tongue. These people, were dangerous. The redheaded one was probably a witch and a strong one at that. He could recognize the signs, had seen it on his wife and daughter but the one here was dealing with dark magic. The other slight woman had nearly torn off the arm of his son so she was a worry as well. "It's complicated." He sighed.
"Well, you're talking to experts on complicated matters. I mean if there were prizes, we'd win." Buffy couldn't understand anything being more complicated than her life.
"Alright, I'll explain. But first, where are Donny and Beth? Are they still at your house?" He was afraid that Donny may have decided to take matters into his own hands and that would not be wise considering the formidability of the people standing before him. He was glad to see the blonde girl nod at his question. "Maybe you should try and find Tara and meet me back at your house. I'll explain it all then. To Tara and everyone."
It wasn't a bad suggestion. Willow wanted to find Tara anyway, to verify that she was ok and that her father had not hurt her in anyway. "Fine, I'll walk around and see if I can find her. Buffy why don't you take Dawn home." It wasn't that she didn't want company but it was more that she didn't trust Tara's dad and wanted Buffy to ensure that he would go back to the house and wait. Luckily, the slayer had a similar inkling and jumped in before Dawn could protest. "Good idea, Will. Dawn, do this and we won't have to decide between grounding for a week or a month, for sneaking out without permission." Dawn decided that it would be better not to argue and started trudging back to the house with Buffy and Mr. Maclay following behind.
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You must think that something is happening with you, that life has not forgotten you, that it holds you in its hand; It will not let you fall
And Death shall have no Dominion