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The Butterfly Palace

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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby tarebear » Fri Mar 03, 2006 6:03 am

oh wow! an update yey! :bounce :bounce :bounce i'll come back later for a proper feedback! but woo and hoo! :bounce :bounce
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby Useful_Oxymoron » Fri Mar 03, 2006 5:50 pm

Ah, a lovely story. New and original setting.

Oh, and the image of a five year old Willow setting out into the wide-open world with a knapsack and a stuffed tiger on a string is so frighteningly cute, it hurts. :)

Of course, being five years old and alone, that can be very frightening. Such a sad scene with Willow underneath that bush. Looks like our Tara's been living a more privilaged life in this case too. Many twists and turns along the road.

May I add my voice to the chorus and request update-y goodness? :bounce
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Sam : Not if you mind me clawing at the dashboard and shrieking like a cheerleader.
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby Emms » Sun Mar 05, 2006 1:20 am

Replies to feedback left on Chapter Three.

Technically it is still Saturday (my time) so I cannot be called a slacker! (not that any of you would…I mean, not to my face anyway…but possibly behind my back….) Hey you! Over there! Yeah you! Quiet down…. :glasses

ETA: I just looked at the clock and have realized that it is no longer Saturday…let the name calling begin…. :ashamed

Ces,

what a way to open the new year! an update from one of my favorite authors! i'm a little rusty with the feedback so bear with me.


Any feedback is welcome feedback, sweetie--rusty or otherwise!

Yep, it is true. A lot had happened in the five years since Willow was born. But that’s the way with change most times. Things build slowly, but we only realize the change happens all at once.

so brave of her to do so... i remember being scared of going to the bathroom alone after dark at her age let alone running away from home... she has a mind to get scared, but she also knows she's intelligent and she can get herself out of trouble.


I guess it can be said that their world is not a happy world and this little Willow is steadfast that she will make it on her own. I would probably run away too.

AlysonGoddess,

Thank you, hun!

Jeanne,

Okay, my fb is a little delayed, 'cos I was in the middle of typing it out last night & my comp decided to crash, so I lost everything I'd typed - stupid computer But I'm pretty sure I remember what I'd typed so, hopefully, I'll actually get to post it this time.


Oh man, I hate when that happens.

Emms, sweetie, I'm left more & more intrigued with every wonderful update of this fic, it's quite brilliant, & so very cleverly written.


Thank you [/blush]

reminded me of Margaret Atwood's Handmaid's Tale. I'm not sure why, maybe 'cos of the "shopping attire", & the whole, baby obsession.


That’s kinda funny, ’cos I actually own that book. I haven’t read it yet, though. Maybe I should. Hehe

Thank you for your thoughtful words sweetie!

Sally,

Thank you for your comments, dear. I know the details seem a bit raw right now, but I’m not the best at making things comprehensive. Hopefully things will smooth over as I go along. I hope you liked chapter four as well.

Debra,

What a painful and heart-wrenching start. Willow setting out as a 5 year old boy? seems quite young but it's not the same world we live in. I'm hoping she'll be ok (or as ok as she'll be anyway). Interesting that she actually think she is a boy. More?


Indeed. And…I’m sure Willow will be fine. (she has to be)

It’s kinda not all that surprising that willow believes herself to be a boy…I mean, if she’s never seen anything to tell her otherwise, I’m sure she would simply accept what her mother told her…She’s only five though…something tells me there is a lot of time yet, for her to learn the difference between boy and girl.

Chris,

Wow, cruel world indeed. And presented so well - I found a kind of black humour kept coming through as I read, which strangely makes the harshness of Willow's early life all the more real, by not consciously drawing attention to it. I really got a strong feeling of 'this is how life is' for this society, and how they truly didn't see the nastiness of their ways.


Thank you so much. That was so eloquently put. And I find your black humor comment fitting. Thank you.

Something that really leapt out at me, whether by your design or just by chance, was Willow's stuffed tiger, Tiger. Just that, her having this toy tiger, and calling it something so simple as 'Tiger', really brought home to me how young she is, how sad it is that she's unloved, and how brave she is to set out on her own. And yes, it may be equal parts optimism and ignorance of the wider world, but she's taken the first step in making her life hers.


All great points indeed. Another reason I wanted Willow’s tiger named Tiger was to illustrate the dominate parts of Willow’s personality. To her, the tiger is a tiger and should be named as such. No muss. No fuss. Which is going to turn out to be very much the way Willow is in this story.

Thank you for your comments, darling.

bluewillowwitch

Hi there, Grace. Thank you so much for taking the time to leave a few words of feedback. It is muchly appreciated. I’m so happy you’re liking the story!

Irene

Just finished reading your lastest installment of "Butterfly". Now here comes the sad smiley...


I know when I started this fic that Willow’s struggle would be very difficult to read. No one likes to think about a child all alone in the world with no one to take care of them…but I promise, things Willow get better.

Saluting you while devising a plan to take over the world.


So how’s that workin' for ya? :wink

DarthPacula

Hi Paul!

G'day, Emms. (aka the author previously known as Miss Kitty's Ball o' Yarn, and blimey that is a mouthful )


Heehee :lol

I know that Watson already mentioned a kind of Oriental feeling, but I think it's also a bit Dickensian, what with children being sold, and work houses/feather plucking factories. I also know that you yourself said you're basically coming up with this worlds details as you go along, but what you've got so far has peaked my interest.


I think you both are right. To me, the feel is kind of a mixture of many different cultures, people, places and things.

I know you’ve asked a lot of questions, but unfortunately I don’t have any answers for ya. This story is sort of unfolding as I go along…so I’m as much in the dark as you are, at the moment.

Thank you for taking the time to leave feedback and I hope the next few chapters can help to answer your questions.
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby Emms » Sun Mar 05, 2006 1:43 am

Replies to feedback left on chapter four:

HA! Told you I wasn’t a slacker! hehe :lol :-D

Jeanne,

Haha! You thought of a gay Muppet when you heard the name: Rainbow Scooter? I can’t say that I blame you…I probably would have gotten that impression too. :lol

Actually, Rainbow Scooter is the name of a homeless man my wife befriended some time ago. She spent quite a long time talking to and getting to know him and he was able to tell her all kinds of interesting stories about his life and travels.

So, I'm rather shocked, you've written a male character who actually sounds like he might be nice. Okay so, he's a little harsh, but, he sounds like he's had a hard life & he's not meaning to snap at poor little Willow.


I’ve written male characters who were not complete assholes before, haven’t I? ….haven’t I? :paranoid *thinking* What about the Donny in Catching Sunflowers…? He turned out to be an okay guy in the end. :|

I can see from a certain section of your feedback that you have a lot of questions, Jea…but unfortunately I cannot answer a single one, on the grounds that it may incriminate me. :-D

Thank you so much, sweetie. Thank you for being so thoughtful and thorough in your feedback, it means so much to me. You have always been so supportive, and for that I thank you, as well. :x

Ces, Take your time, dear.

Irene,

Thank you, dear. I’m glad that you’re not tired of the original characters yet. That’s a risk we writers run sometimes when introducing new people not of the original Buffy cannon--that people will be turned off by that. I like adding original people into my stories so I’m glad to know it hasn’t become annoying yet.

I struggled a little, trying to finish reading the part of a young Willow alone, underneath that bush, crying and shivering in the cold. It was extrodinary how, even in her current state of despair and loneliness, Willow still wouldn't allow anyone to take Tiger away from her. And I'm also very impressed with the way she cared more about Rainbow crying than she did about her own tears.


Awww sweetie, I seem to keep traumatizing you with too much detail about Willow! I’m so sorry…but don’t cry, okay? ‘cos it will get better, you’ll see.

Useful Oxymoron

Thank you for the wonderful feedback! More is on its way!
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby Emms » Sun Mar 05, 2006 2:07 am

[center]Image[/center]

All disclaimers Apply:

Note: This chapter is a little shorter than I normally like to post, but I felt it necessary. I hope you all like it.

Chapter Five:


The sound of Pan-Flute music danced in the air as Willow raced through the crowded streets toward Blackfoot’s Central Square. The water on the ground, pooled in dips and dents along the stone streets and splashed, making slapping noises under her leather boots as she ran.

She’d left Ra(inbow) behind to wait for her in the tumble-down shack they shared. The shack was dilapidated but it sat on the banks of the Brunsharg river--which made its unattractiveness slightly more appealing

He was too old to move much now, and his journeys were limited to the shack and small surrounding areas along the river’s edge. Most days he wouldn’t move around too much at all and would keep to himself in the rickety old bed Willow had fashioned for him out of a few weathered logs she’d found at the river’s edge--cast-off remains from the old logging channel that used to flow there. Willow suspected that the logs had somehow managed to find their way to the dipped bank where some passerby had pulled them to safety but had left before having found a use for them, which was just as well.

She could hear the sounds of people talking grow steadily strident the closer she came to her destination, and the smell of meats roasting in the vender’s carts parked along the outer edges of the Square was heady in her nose, reminding her she hadn’t eaten anything since the previous night. However, there was no time for food, and even if there had been time there was still the little problem of not having any money.

When she had been younger Ra had taken care of her, and they’d always managed to find something to eat along the way, but now that he was ill it was her duty to take care of him.

If it hadn’t been for Ra Willow knew she wouldn’t have survived for as long as she had. She owed him her life, and that was the reason for her hasty trek into the city that morning.

The hair she had tucked up under her cap before she’d set off that morning stuck to the back of her neck in sweaty tendrils of red silk--the only acknowledgement she offered herself of her femininity. She'd found out long ago that she was not a boy. But that didn't stop her from wanting to be. Willow pushed the escaping hair back up under her cap with steady fingers, and elbowed her way through the gathering crowd. They had all come there for one purpose.

The list would be posted any moment and every man in the crowd longed to be on it. Jobs were scarce then and this list had the potential to be the soul salvation for every man there--most of whom, had small children to feed--which Ra had told her hadn’t been the case back in the time of Willow’s birth.

But this was not the reality Willow knew--Babies were commonplace now and they ran naked through the streets in packs, like stray dogs. Most were dingy and grubby from a life of play and delinquency but some were tended to on a regular basis. Those with fathers to take care of them faired better than the ones without even though times were hard, and jobs were almost non-existent--even for the most able bodied of them.

At the age of sixteen, which she roughly estimated to be correct based on the information Ra had been able to recall of her early childhood, Willow had a great handle on the realities of life and because of this, she knew her chances for being placed were stacked fairly in her favor.

She was still young, which gave her an advantage over the older men vying for the same positions. Most estates wanted strong, young men that could take long days of labor without complaint. Willow knew she could work hard. And she was smart--smarter than most, which gave her the upper hand most everywhere else. However, youth and brains were only half of the struggle, the other half was overcoming the fact that she was thinner than most of the other men and boys around her, and this tiny thing was the only aspect in which Willow paled in comparison next to her gender-true companions.

As a girl, she would have made an impressive sight with her muscled arms and her well defined legs, but as a boy she was not much to gander over, and had been passed up many times before for the larger more able-bodied men. But she had a good feeling about things this time around and Willow knew she would be selected because she’d prayed each night in secret and each morning she had prayed again.

The bodies of the other men knocked into her from all sides but Willow ignored them as she intently searched the list of names and placements. She wanted this more than she had wanted anything in her life.

And then she saw it. The list. And then the name--her name. Willow squeezed her eyes closed and then reopened them just to reassure herself that she was not imagining what she saw. There it was, in black script: Will. Rosenberg was the name she’d given them when they’d asked for a last name. The only bit of her former name she could remember was Rosen, and she’d been terrified that they would reject her if she could not come up with a suitable last name--berg seemed to fit nicely at the time.

“Move out of the way!” someone yelled, and Willow was being pushed away from the list…but not before she read her placement… The MacLean estate.

Willow puffed out her chest as she made her way back the way she’d come. Ra would be proud of her. She’d done it this time, and soon she’d have enough money to send her adopted guardian to the place he most wanted to be--home.

Over the years, Ra had told Willow many times of the place he’d lived before the climatic events of his life had forced him to search elsewhere for the things he needed. She knew he had a daughter at one time…but whenever he would get to that part of the story something would change inside him and he would grow pensive and silent. She’d always wanted to pry deeper into that aspect of his past but had been scared that it would drive him over the edge into a place neither of them wanted to go.

Willow smiled. She had a job. She had a purpose in life now and soon she was sure she would be able to take care of Ra the way he needed to be taken care of…perhaps she’d even make enough to hire a doctor to come out to the shack and see about him.

Life was full of possibilities as she walked along the river.

******************************************************************
Tara tore down the east grounds toward the servant quarters, nearly tripping over the long skirts that tangled around her legs. She wore no shoes and her toes sunk deeply into the plush grass with every stride.

It was hot that day and she could feel perspiration gathering against her skin under her clothing, but she didn’t stop running until she reached the line of trees that marked the beginning of the Servant’s cabins.

The cabins where of medium size and very rustic looking. Tara loved them. She loved immersing herself in the lives of the individuals who lived and worked there. She would spend most days there, learning from the men that forged their way in the world with nothing bur their own two hands. She longed to be apart of their world.

“Good day, Hans! Good day Brud!” Tara called as she rushed past two men working iron in a stone circle of red hot coals. She didn’t have time to stop and talk fore, she was on her way to the old shed at the end of the row of cabins. She knew Mr. Rory would be there already.

Rory was the oldest man living on the servant grounds. Tara had asked him his age once when she was much younger but he never would give her a concrete answer. And after time Tara had given up trying to coax the information out of him. He was her friend and that was all that mattered.

Rory had been around as long as Tara could remember and she knew he had, at one time, been an indentured servant on the property. But Tara suspected that was a long time before her father bought the estate and they’d begun living there. Rory was the only worker on the grounds no longer bonded to the land, and was free to leave if he chose to. She often wondered if one day she would wake up and he’d be gone.

Tara found Mr. Rory bent over his workbench sanding a chunk of wood she’d seen him bevel the day before. It looked as if he was just about ready to attach the decorative bit to the piece of furniture he‘d crafted.

“You really shouldn’t be out here Miss Tara. Don’t you remember what happened the last time he caught you mucking around with the likes of us?”

The he Rory was referring to was Tara’s father. “I’m n-not afraid of h-him.” Tara couldn’t help the stutter that formed even though she was putting on a brave show she couldn’t help but feel a little anxious at the thought of her father catching her in the servants quarters again. The last time had cost her a month, and her shoulder still bothered her when it rained.

“He pulled your arm clean out of the socket that time, didn’t he?”

Tara nodded but dismissed Rory’s fears. Her longing to be there outweighed any fear she might have been harboring about her father’s temper.

“How do you expect to work in that?”

Rory pointed to her dress and she grinned. “Like this.” She raised her skirt and watched Rory turn his head. “Relax, will you?” Tara smiled as she pulled the rest of her skirt up to show him the pants she had put on underneath. “Help me with this, will you?” Tara turned her back so that Rory could unfasten the hooks holding her bodice in place. “Now you can turn your back, and hand me a shirt,” Tara instructed politely. Rory handed her a man’s work-shirt over his back.

Tara slipped into the shirt he’d given her and carefully placed her dress onto a cloth that was draped across one of the work benches. “You can turn around now,” Tara said, smiling at the man.

Rory offered Tara the other piece of wood that needed sanding and she got straight to work on it. Tara straddled the bench and sat down, hunching over her work as if it could save her soul.

TBC
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby tarebear » Sun Mar 05, 2006 2:41 am

:blush oh fudge! i feel like i'm the slacker... i promised proper feedback... but but with me, that's a tall order i guess hehe...

chapter four:

when i first started reading about rainbow scooter, i can't help but feel sorry for his life, but i realized along the way reading through his story that here was a man who tried to cope best with what life dealt him with... in spite of every bad thing that happened in his life, he tried to be a good man nonetheless... he might be dirty outside, but i'm sure he has a sparkly clean heart...i think he will be a good influence on willow...

willow starting out full of determination to get away from her situation at home finally hit with the realization that perhaps she had made a brash decision... that maybe she cannot do this on her own... scary to make that realization when you're lost and wet...

i'm glad these two crossed paths... here is a win-win situation: him with wanting the love of a lost daughter and her with needing the guidance of a father...

elsie's story too is a little saddening... with all that she had to go through with her life, no wonder she has lost her lust for it... just going with the flow (or in her case, going with the blow... ouch!) and hoping that her two children don't get involved in the crossfire... her husband is a bad bad man that hopefully will get his just desserts...

we finally get to see a glimpse of litte rich tara... too innocent to really know what's going on around her, just going with blind faith to where her mother is taking her on this journey...

i can't wait to find out how willow and tara's lives will cross...

this is another great chapter ms emms... everything described as well as could be... a little glimpse of the story behind each tear, each sigh, each scar....

i will patiently wait for what happens next...

before i go, i just had to mention this...

Age had done a job on him as well, making him hardened, weathered and not much to look at.


are you describing me in my feeling-crappy mornings? except i'm not a he nor THAT old hehe... sorry, i told you proper feedback is not my thing

ETA: wow, when i submitted this post was i surprised to see chapter five! so ah, DIBS?
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby kindagay » Sun Mar 05, 2006 9:54 am

Oh, another update - Yay! :bounce :dance :D :party :applause :bow - can you tell that I'm a little excited? :blush

Hi Emms, :wave

Oh, we've time travelled, & I didn't feel a thing :)

I'm glad that Ra cared for Willow while she was a child, & it's sweet to see Will returning the favour now. I kinda have a feeling that she's gonna get some help looking after Ra very soon, now that she's got herself a job with the MacLean's. Yay! She's gonna meet Tara soon! :bounce

She'd found out long ago that she was not a boy.
Now that must have been an interesting discovery :lol

It doesn't sound like things have got much better over the years, rather they seem to be worse now, with all those children running around & not enough jobs to go around. :aww

As a girl, she would have made an impressive sight with her muscled arms and her well defined legs,
Yummy :drool

Willow puffed out her chest as she made her way back the way she’d come. Ra would be proud of her
Willow's so cute all proud, & I'm positive that Ra will be extremely proud & pleased for her. :)

Okay, on to Tara now & I'll start with a grr :happy to Tara's father - I do hate that man.

So, Tara sounds kinda tomboy-ish too - that's cute. :) & it's sweet & so wonderfully 'Tara' to be friends with all the servants & to help them do their work too - especially considering the consequences of getting caught, she's so brave.

“How do you expect to work in that?”

Rory pointed to her dress and she grinned. “Like this.” She raised her skirt and watched Rory turn his head. “Relax, will you?” Tara smiled as she pulled the rest of her skirt up to show him the pants she had put on underneath.
:lol That was cute.

Tara straddled the bench and sat down, hunching over her work as if it could save her soul.
& that was hot :drool There's something so sexy about a girl who doesn't shy away from hard labour, plus, with the straddling... :drool

Okay, I reached the end of the update, so, I'll stop.
& I just realised I didn't ask any questions - oh, that's not to say that I'm not still intrigued & curious, I am, very interested & intrigued & excited to read more. :D

Oh, & just to clarify...
I’ve written male characters who were not complete assholes before, haven’t I?
Uhm, I'm sure you have sweetie, I just meant that, Rainbow was the first nice male character in this story.

Okay, I really am gonna shut up now :blush

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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby Emms » Sun Mar 05, 2006 3:49 pm

Ces,

oh fudge! i feel like i'm the slacker... i promised proper feedback... but but with me, that's a tall order i guess hehe...


Hehe. No problem, sweetie. I did say that you should feel free to take your time. :-D

when i first started reading about rainbow scooter, i can't help but feel sorry for his life, but i realized along the way reading through his story that here was a man who tried to cope best with what life dealt him with... in spite of every bad thing that happened in his life, he tried to be a good man nonetheless... he might be dirty outside, but i'm sure he has a sparkly clean heart...i think he will be a good influence on willow...


I think that’s true about the human spirit most of the time. What I love about Ra is that he’s so layered and even though we don’t know everything that happened to him throughout his life we get that sense that he’s a decent man--at least that’s what I get from writing him. I hope that made any sense at all.

i'm glad these two crossed paths... here is a win-win situation: him with wanting the love of a lost daughter and her with needing the guidance of a father...


Exactly. They very much balance each other out. Willow needs a protector and Ra needs to protect.

Thank you so much for taking the time to leave feedback, Ces. I’m really enjoying writing this story anyway, but it makes it so much more fun to know that there are a few people still reading it.

***********************************************

Jeanne.

Oh, we've time travelled, & I didn't feel a thing


:D

Yay! She's gonna meet Tara soon!


I’m thinking very soon…like next update soon.

It doesn't sound like things have got much better over the years, rather they seem to be worse now, with all those children running around & not enough jobs to go around.


Yeah, their country seems to be having a hard time finding its balance…

So, Tara sounds kinda tomboy-ish too - that's cute. & it's sweet & so wonderfully 'Tara' to be friends with all the servants & to help them do their work too - especially considering the consequences of getting caught, she's so brave.


Yeah, Tara’s a little bit tomboy-ish…but much less so than Willow. In fact, I have a feeling Tara can get down right girlish if the need be.

& that was hot There's something so sexy about a girl who doesn't shy away from hard labour, plus, with the straddling...


Agreed.:drool
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby Artemis » Mon Mar 06, 2006 8:21 pm

Willow and Rainbow are a sweet pair - both having taken big nasty whacks from life, but managing in meeting each other to salvage some of what their lives could have been, had fate been kinder to begin with. So they managed, in spite of fate, to find a 'family' for themselves, and both have prospered because of it - Willow being taken care of as a child, and now taking care of the old man in turn. (I was worried for a moment, when Rainbow saw Tiger in the rain, that Willow had lost him - I like Tiger :blush )

I like the evolution of the 'world' we're seeing as time passes - things have changed, kind of for the better, but it's still obviously a harsh world if you're not lucky. But Willow's still got the spirit that let her strike out on her own all those years ago, making her own luck if nothing else comes her way.

(Plus, I like work-out-defined Willow :x )

I'll be really interested to see Willow and Tara meet. Some of the how is obvious by now, but it's the details that promise to be intriguing. I imagine Tara's going to be spending a lot of time around the servants once Willow shows up, which risks nastiness from her father - Tara's got spirit of her own, to defy him, but she's not exactly protecting herself, and I can easily imagine Willow coming over all kinds of protective if Tara's father hurts her. And while the image of her laying the guy out may be well-deserved, it'd probably not be without consequences... Add in Willow's desire to be a boy, I wonder how that'll mesh with her and Tara - she'll have to own up to being a girl at some point, before hot gay loving can eventuate... interesting situation.

I like the title graphic too, very vivid.
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby Tues » Tue Mar 07, 2006 1:35 pm

I'm sitting here... on the floor with a blanket pulled over my head and body hunched over this screen (sick today)...

Suddenly, I'm under a bracken-berry bush in the dark and the rain and hail is making me shudder.

When my rear goes as numb as my toes, I shift around to bring blood back to the frozen parts of my body. All of sudden I'm flushed and angry, maybe it's my fever? But, I could swear it's because DonAldo! Or, maybe it's the nightmare images of Elsie being taken away. I really am feverish, there's a slight tingle in the back of my mind a connection between 2 of your characters (not the ususal 2, well there's that as well)?

My head's kind of hurting, but I can't move... poor old Rainbow, I know he feels worse than I do. I envy Will's strong body at the moment, but not her tough position in life. I feel worse for Tara though, because DonAldo triggers nothing but dread in me and now I feel queasy.

But I have a stout heart.
Life was full of possibilities
So, I can wait for better times.

Now as I pull the blanket off me, shivering, I look around and wonder. "How did I get here? I could have sworn I was somewhere else?" A different place... so atmospheric, so real, steeped in detail and beyond this modern world....

Amazing? How do you do that?
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby Darth Pacula » Tue Mar 07, 2006 4:18 pm

G'day, Emms.

First off, I must say I feel a little bit betrayed. You said, and I quote:

There will be princesses, daring sword fights, Willows in disguise (no wait...that sounds like something else....) Okay, no sword fights...well, possibly a sword fight.


Possibly a sword fight? I didn't see no sword fight! Not even a knife fight! I would have even settled for a sword fight using dildos ala Sorority Boys, but alas, all my hopes were dashed.

...

You do realize I'm just being a silly little git, right? :-D But it was sounding like 'The Princess Bride' there for a bit.

Well, another character has joined the dramatis personae of this unique little world you've conjured, in Rainbow Scooter. Well, he's got an interesting name to start, not to mention a bum knee, one that's left one leg three inches shorter than the other. That must have been one nasty accident.

You know ... well of course you know, you're the one doing it ... but back on track ... you do such a good job of making the world in which you place your characters a living, breathing world. The smallest detail can just leap out at the reader and almost touch them on the nose. I salute your talent, milady. :bow (I would have preferred an emoticon with more of a courtly flourish type bow, but ... eh, what are you gonna do?)

I liked the way that Willow was scared enough of Rainbow to hide, a sensible precaution, but brave enough to expose herself to save Tiger from an uncertain fate. Don't know why, but that just spoke to me. (It said something like 'comment on this, you little twit')

Ahh, and Tara makes an appearance, even if she isn't mentioned by name. Can I just say, DonAldo? He sounds a right bastard. I'd happily do for the git if: A) I could get away with it without fear of imprisonment or physical harm, and B) if he wasn't a fictional character in a story, thusly making all of my posturing utterly irrelevant. :-D

Boy this world you've created seems to veer from one extreme to the other doesn't it, staggering like a drunkard from one near catastrophe to the next without pause. It almost makes me think that they are recovering from some sort of vast cataclysm.

Lets all hear it for a buff Willow, shall we? :drool

It's good to see Tara isn't one of those snobby rich girls, though I doubt she ever could be, don't you? The whole bit with the servants quarters seem reminiscent of a cross between the slaves of the Deep South, and the serfs of medieval Europe, which is fun for a history buff like myself.

Okay, a dislocated shoulder? From her own father, just for being found in the servants quarters? You know that little disclaimer I made above? Forget it! I'd gladly stick a shiv in that SOB's liver, no matter the personal cost. :angry

On that marginally disturbing note, I bid you farewell, Emms, and wish you a happy and productive day. Me, I plan to do sod all, cuz I've got the day off.

Cheers,
Paul.
That’s right: In order to make this event LESS popular, the female activists take off their tops and jog in front of onlookers. - Scott Adams, regarding the Running of the Bulls in Pamplona.
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby FineyMcFine » Tue Mar 07, 2006 7:13 pm

Emms, thanks for this pair of updates! When I first realized the time-travel, I was like "Aw, no!" but then I realized that they were both young kids at the time and that them being all grown up means that when they meet there's a good possibility for smoochies and stuff, since it seems like the age of consent in their universe is not as stringent as is modern times. ;) I feel that they will actually meet any day now! Looking forward to it.
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby tarebear » Sat Mar 11, 2006 10:25 am

hiya ms emms! i finally get the chance to break away from RL to finally get a chance to leave feedback... reading the others' insightful feedbacks, i feel inadequate to form even coherent sentences. :blush will "i love this chapter... can't wait for more" be a worthy enough feedback for an adored story such as this? i guess not, but those words capture the truth of the way i feel about your fic... please forgive this nonsense... my brain's been malfunctioning for a while now...

anyways, like them, the time leap was made but you made it so that through your eloquent words we get to imagine the sort of lives these two lead in that interim... how things have changed around them... or not.

willow has prospered in ra's tutelage... and because of willow, ra has found a new purpose in life... that maybe the hardships he had to face in his life made him ready to be the sort of father willow not only wanted but needed... willow has been a determined and strong individual even as a child, but through ra, i believe the bright spirit under those layers of unhappy experiences did finally show through... she is not only thinking about merely surviving in this cruel world, but she sees how life is full of possibilities... she sees a purpose and that is taking care of ra as he took care of her... and maybe when she meets tara, she will have other purposes.

tara it seemed has prospered too in spite of the cruelty in the hands of her beloved (NOT!) father and that's no thanks to him... she has found herself through the other people in her lives that showed her what her father never could... she might get physical beatings from her father but she never did let him beat her spirits down...

they will eventually be meeting each other and soon... as willow will be working in the MacLean estate and tara spending most of her days with the servants... they might have grown in different worlds but their spirits will recognize each other and sigh for finding their home at last...

okay enough with the cheesy feedback... i bet after reading through my nonsensical ramblings, you would rather have had "i love this chapter... can't wait for more" script :lol

anyways... thanks again for taking us into a new world... i hope to read another chapter real soon! and yey to me coz i finally got to write feedback!

later!
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby AlysonGoddess » Sun Mar 12, 2006 11:01 am

Yay i like the way this is going i think im seeing a connection between willow and tara.. with willow wanting a job.. maybe shell work for taras parents.. and that darn father of taras id like to give him a piece of my mind. But ya fabulous update i beg for more plz update soon!
Erin
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby Emms » Wed Mar 15, 2006 12:05 pm

Hi everyone. Just a note to let you know that the next chapter is on its way and should be posted a little later!

xoxo
Emms
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby tarebear » Thu Mar 16, 2006 9:01 am

woo hoo! can't wait!
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby viximon » Thu Mar 16, 2006 11:16 am

Ey Emms!! Where's the update?? :bounce I want it want it want it.
Love the fic and can't wait for Will to start her job at Tara's and why not, meet her and stuff :-D

take care. See you around
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby Emms » Thu Mar 16, 2006 10:30 pm

The update is coming up next, but first...REPLIES! WOO!


*********************************************************

Chris ~

Willow and Rainbow are a sweet pair - both having taken big nasty whacks from life, but managing in meeting each other to salvage some of what their lives could have been, had fate been kinder to begin with. So they managed, in spite of fate, to find a 'family' for themselves, and both have prospered because of it - Willow being taken care of as a child, and now taking care of the old man in turn.


Indeed.

(I was worried for a moment, when Rainbow saw Tiger in the rain, that Willow had lost him - I like Tiger


I write Tiger just for you, sweetie :flirt :-D

I like work-out-defined Willow


me too. :x

I'll be really interested to see Willow and Tara meet. Some of the how is obvious by now, but it's the details that promise to be intriguing.
I imagine Tara's going to be spending a lot of time around the servants once Willow shows up, which risks nastiness from her father - Tara's got spirit of her own, to defy him, but she's not exactly protecting herself, and I can easily imagine Willow coming over all kinds of protective if Tara's father hurts her. And while the image of her laying the guy out may be well-deserved, it'd probably not be without consequences... Add in Willow's desire to be a boy, I wonder how that'll mesh with her and Tara - she'll have to own up to being a girl at some point, before hot gay loving can eventuate... interesting situation.


I think you've summed future events up nicely. :lol I actually have most of this story written...and let's say you've covered about 97% of it in that one paragraph. :lol So I guess I'll have to pray that the details continue to make this story interesting. :glasses :-D

I like the title graphic too, very vivid.


Thank you. But honestly, I was just messing around with paintshop. I don't really know what the heck I'm doing. :|

****************************************************************************
TuesBlu ~

I'm sitting here... on the floor with a blanket pulled over my head and body hunched over this screen (sick today)...


Awww...poor thing...I hope you're feeling better now.

You have quite a vivid imagination. I suspect that is highly dangerous when fic reading, huh? But thank you. :blush All I can do is write and hope that I'm able to immerse the reader in my world...you have no Idea how nice it is to know that what I'm writing is having such an effect on people. Thank you so much for that.

*********************************************************************************
*********************************************************************************

Paul
~

Possibly a sword fight? I didn't see no sword fight! Not even a knife fight! I would have even settled for a sword fight using dildos ala Sorority Boys, but alas, all my hopes were dashed.


HaHa! There's still time for sword fights. :-D

But it was sounding like 'The Princess Bride' there for a bit.


hehe...yeah, that was the joke. :lol

Well, another character has joined the dramatis personae of this unique little world you've conjured, in Rainbow Scooter. Well, he's got an interesting name to start, not to mention a bum knee, one that's left one leg three inches shorter than the other. That must have been one nasty accident.


probably...perhaps he was attacked by a pack of rabid dogs... :hmm

You know ... well of course you know, you're the one doing it ... but back on track ... you do such a good job of making the world in which you place your characters a living, breathing world. The smallest detail can just leap out at the reader and almost touch them on the nose. I salute your talent, milady. (I would have preferred an emoticon with more of a courtly flourish type bow, but ... eh, what are you gonna do?)


You're too cute. And thank you very much. :blush

I liked the way that Willow was scared enough of Rainbow to hide, a sensible precaution, but brave enough to expose herself to save Tiger from an uncertain fate. Don't know why, but that just spoke to me. (It said something like 'comment on this, you little twit')


Please don't feel silly at all. I think "Tiger" has been commented on by a lot of people. And he's one symbol I really feel strongly about in this fic. Willow, even as a child came across as this strong, independent person...braving the outside world...but still she has this resounding sensitive and childlike side and that's represented through Tiger. Tiger keeps her rooted in childhood.

Ahh, and Tara makes an appearance, even if she isn't mentioned by name. Can I just say, DonAldo? He sounds a right bastard. I'd happily do for the git if: A) I could get away with it without fear of imprisonment or physical harm, and B) if he wasn't a fictional character in a story, thusly making all of my posturing utterly irrelevant


:lmao

The whole bit with the servants quarters seem reminiscent of a cross between the slaves of the Deep South, and the serfs of medieval Europe, which is fun for a history buff like myself.


This fic totally exists in this nowhere world...and is a mixture of a lot of different cultures and settings...it's so cool to see the different perceptions people get of this world. I think watson said it seemed Oriental…and someone else said it felt Dicken-esque. :lol

Okay, a dislocated shoulder? From her own father, just for being found in the servants quarters? You know that little disclaimer I made above? Forget it! I'd gladly stick a shiv in that SOB's liver, no matter the personal cost


Amen, Brotha'! Willow will have to kick his ass!

Thank you for the wonderful feedback, Paul!

******************************************************************************
Sally~

Emms, thanks for this pair of updates! When I first realized the time-travel, I was like "Aw, no!" but then I realized that they were both young kids at the time and that them being all grown up means that when they meet there's a good possibility for smoochies and stuff, since it seems like the age of consent in their universe is not as stringent as is modern times. I feel that they will actually meet any day now! Looking forward to it.


Thank you, hun! Yep. The actual meeting is on its way. I hope you're still liking the story!
******************************************************************************

Irene! No apologies necessary. I'm just glad to see you're smilin' face when it graces any of my threads. :-D

Alas, the handsome and rugged Willow was chosen by The MacLean estate. Rainbow would truly be proud


let's hope so...

My son is lying in my bed tucked under his favorite blanket. He's been sick for about a week now. I look at him and I realize that I'm crying. Why am I crying? Because I love him and my daughter and I could never see myself harming them in any way; physically or emotionally. I paused and re-read the part where DonAldo dislocates Tara's shoulder. This really happens, I begin to think. Children do suffer like this. Something should be done. I'm with Paul (Darth Pacula)...except it wouldn't be his liver where I would stick that shiv.


I know what you mean...it is hard to think of anyone hurting a child...but it happens all the time and that is the sad truth. DonAldo is an asshole...and he'll get what he has coming to him. I'm sure Willow won't let him hurt Tara.

I remember beign a young girl and tagging along with mi papa (my dad) wherever he went. I hated weekend housework... I would wake up early just to complete my chores quickly and spend the entire day with mi papa. I learned how to change break disks, fan belts. I would assist him in tune-ups, changing flat tires. On weekends in which he mowed the lawn, I didn't have to do my 'in house' chores because mi papa needed me outside to help him. When we were done, we would sneak off to 'Jims' a local hamburger joint and indulge in burger goodness...an ice cream cone would soon follow. My mom and siblings had no clue we did this. Even though I have a brother, I believe I was mi papa's only son.


what a beautiful story, Irene. I wish I could say that I had such experiences with my father as a child, but I can't. I never met my dad...and my step father was a very abusive man. Perhaps that's why I tend to cast Tara's father in such a negative light in my fics...? [/moment of inner reflection]

Thank you for all your wonderful comments, sweetie. :x

****************************************************************************

Ces~

hiya ms emms! i finally get the chance to break away from RL to finally get a chance to leave feedback... reading the others' insightful feedbacks, i feel inadequate to form even coherent sentences. will "i love this chapter... can't wait for more" be a worthy enough feedback for an adored story such as this? i guess not, but those words capture the truth of the way i feel about your fic... please forgive this nonsense... my brain's been malfunctioning for a while now...


Thank you. :blush

willow has prospered in ra's tutelage... and because of willow, ra has found a new purpose in life... that maybe the hardships he had to face in his life made him ready to be the sort of father willow not only wanted but needed... willow has been a determined and strong individual even as a child, but through ra, i believe the bright spirit under those layers of unhappy experiences did finally show through... she is not only thinking about merely surviving in this cruel world, but she sees how life is full of possibilities... she sees a purpose and that is taking care of ra as he took care of her... and maybe when she meets tara, she will have other purposes.


I think you're right. I think Ra taking care of her and her in turn taking care of him, has taught her what it's like to care. She never got that with her own parents. I doubt she would be the willow she is now without him.

they will eventually be meeting each other and soon... as willow will be working in the MacLean estate and tara spending most of her days with the servants... they might have grown in different worlds but their spirits will recognize each other and sigh for finding their home at last...


I can say for certainty that they will meet each other soon. In the next chapter.

Ces, I always love reading your kind words. Thank you so much. :x

**********************************************************************

AlysonGoddess Thank you! I'm glad you're enjoying the story!

***********************************************************************
And lastly I'd like to thank viximon and Ces for their enthusiasm over the next update. Hugs and kisses to you both!
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby Emms » Thu Mar 16, 2006 10:36 pm

[center]Image[/center]

All Disclaimers Apply:

Note: I apologize beforehand for any minor or major mistakes I've made in this update. In my defense, I am very sleepy and my editing skills suck. I really should start using a beta again. :ashamed

Note: Italics = flashback

Chapter Six


When Willow hugged Ra the next day she could feel his bones through his ragged clothing, and this scared her. In all the years she had known him, Willow had never seen him as weak as he was now. But it wasn’t only his physical ailments that frightened Willow, it was his behavior this day that caused her the most concern.

He was acting strangely and refusing to make eye contact with her, even when he was speaking to her. She thought he would have been happier about her getting a job, but instead he seemed despondent, and Willow didn’t know what to say to make it better for him. They really needed the money.

Willow helped Ra down into the only chair in the room. One leg was shorter than the other and it rocked back and forth under Ra’s slight weight.

“You’re a good girl, Willow.”

Ra spoke in a raspy voice and she could see the whites of his knuckles where his grip tightened on the arm of the chair. “What’s wrong?” She begged, peering into his wrinkled eyes. She couldn’t take it anymore. If he wanted her to give up the placement she wanted him to say something and get it over with. She couldn’t take another moment of his odd behavior.

“Nothing, I was just remembering when you were a child, how you hated cabbage worms.”

“Are you hungry? Here, eat these.” Willow, who’d been kneeling, jumped up at once and pulled out the few slices of bread she’d taken from the food stand on the way home, and handed the bread to him. She felt guilty about having stole it, but rationalized it by telling herself she would pay them back once she’d saved up a little money from her new job.

Ra laughed unexpectedly which brought on a coughing spell and Willow got up to get him a dipper of water from the barrel just outside the shack’s front entrance. She could tell he was still thinking about the past, as he paid no attention to the bread in his hand.

Willow waited patiently while he sipped the water and his coughing slowed. “I remember the first time you tried to get me to eat them.” she said, continuing with his earlier thought about the cabbage worms of her youth. She hoped by talking about it she could bring help Ra back into the present.

“ Eat these.”

“What are they?” Willow looked at the squiggling caterpillar in the old man’s hands. It was curling up on itself, trying to fold upward in order to get away…or bite the man; she wasn’t sure which it was.

The creature’s color was a sickly green, and it had red eyes. Willow didn’t like the sight of the thing, it was crawly and creepy in only the way bugs could be.

“Cabbageworms.”

Willow made a face as if she might be sick.

They had been together for a few days and Willow was finding that she liked Rainbow; he was funny and nice to her and good to be around--except, of course, when he was trying to make her eat cabbageworms. Willow thought she could do without those for the rest of her life.

“Now I see why they didn’t want you. You’re far too picky.”

Willow could tell by now when he was teasing her and when he was serious. “Couldn’t we just eat the cabbage and leave the worms?” Willow gulped and looked away from him when he stuck one of the creatures into his mouth and bit down with a sickening crunch. She was glad she missed the dribble of green guts that sprang from the worm and dribbled down his chin, where it became entangled in his wiry, grey beard.

Rainbow was already wiping it away when Willow turned back toward him. Her stomach felt sour, and she wasn’t hungry anymore.

“Nothin’ doin’. Cabbage has very little nutrients. You’re better off with the worms. Protein.”

And with those words Rainbow stuck another twisting caterpillar into his mouth and bit down. Willow felt sick again and might have thrown up if she wasn’t so afraid that he would take advantage of her open mouth and pop a worm into it


As she spoke of the past, Willow lightly touched the back of Ra’s hand. He looked at her as if realizing she was there for the first time. His eyes focused on her and she could tell he hadn’t meant to talk about cabbage worms at length. She could tell he had something else to say. Ra tried to get up out of the chair But Willow stopped him with a hand to his thin shoulder. “Don’t get up. Is there something you need? I’ll get it for you.”

Ra coughed out instructions and Willow followed them to retrieve his old satchel.

“I have something for you.” Rainbow turned his back to her and she could hear him rummaging around in his pack which she had sat on the floor at his feet.

The pack was the only thing that Ra had kept a secret from her. He’d instructed her never to go into it without his permission, thusly he’d never given her permission. But now he was lifting the flap and Willow could feel her curiosity heighten. She’d always wanted to know what he kept buried in that dirty bag.

When he removed his hand from inside the bag, Willow could see that he had a crystal sculpture nestled deep into his palm. It was small and so clear that Willow could see the dirty peach of his hand right through the shiny mineral.

“Do you like it?”

Willow nodded. She was entranced. Never in her life had she seen something as beautiful as this castle. She almost didn’t want to touch it, lest she break one of its many towers. But Ra was holding it out to her, urging her to take it with his eyes. Willow watched Ra’s eyes turn from blue to a deep brow in color, but her attention was drawn to the castle more than it was fastened on Ra, so nothing was said about the change.

“Take it.”

He urged her, so Willow held her hand so that Ra could place the castle onto her palm.

“This once belonged to my little girl, and now I‘d like for you to have it.”

Ra’s face grew pinched and reserved and Willow knew not to question him about what he said, instead she remained silent so that he would continue.

“This is the only thing of value that I have ever owned. Keep this… within it is the history of the world.”

Willow didn’t know what Ra was talking about. The history of the world was lain out before her everyday…it was written on the cobblestone streets, glistening with dirt and rain…it was written in blood on the walls of abandoned houses where feral children gathered. It was written in Willow’s blood and in Ra’s eyes less brilliant than before and heavy with age. She didn’t need a crystal trinket to tell her anything about the history of their world. She witnessed it made everyday.

Willow left shortly after that moment with Ra, the crystal castle nestled securely in her pants pocket. She could feel its heaviness against her leg as she set off toward the outskirts of town. She felt badly about leaving her guardian in his condition but she had no other choice, and it wasn’t as if she’d left him on his own.

Willow had enlisted one of Ra‘s many transient friends to drop in and look after him while she was gone. She had given the woman a few dollars (all she had) so that she might bring Ra food each day.

Willow had to trust that the woman would use the money for its intended purpose.

***********************************************************

Willow was shown to a housing block just east of a great expanse of lawn by a man with three fingers. And even though they walked together neither of them spoke. Willow was still having mixed feelings about leaving Ra by himself, and the man leading her didn’t look like he had much to say, either.

However, Willow did wonder how he’d lost his other two fingers, but didn’t ask, instead she turned her attention to the scenery around her.

The lodging was set behind a line of trees, she could see in perfect clarity, the main house from where she stood.

So this was the famed MacLean estate? Willow thought the structure was impressive with it’s pitched angles, and solid roof. But it was the mansions stone towers which seemed to dominate most of the afternoon sky, and Willow wondered, if at night they’d light torches in the windows. She thought the yellow glow of firelight would be pretty against a purple sky.

***********************************************************

Willow stood waiting for a long time before an older man appeared. He wiped his hands on a rag that he’d pulled out of his back pocket. And then he continued toward her with his hand extended. The three fingered man had left her on her own some time ago.

“I’m Mr. Rory.”

There was a kindness in Rory’s eyes, and Willow knew she instantly liked him. He reminded her of Ra, in a way. “Will,” Willow said simply. She reached out and shook the hand he offered her, trying to make her strength match his as she gripped his larger hand tightly. She would have something to prove, and she knew it. She always had something to prove.

Fire pits loomed in the afternoon sun, adding to the mixture of the metal and smoke smell that had hung in the air since she’d arrived. She wondered if the air always smelled that way, or if the smell was contingent on something specific to that day.

***********************************************************************

Rory spoke as they walked briskly toward an unknown destination. Willow followed deftly trying to keep pace, but the man was larger and his strides swallowed two of Willow’s own strides at a time.

“The cabins have all been taken, but you can bunk in the stables; there is a tack room in the back. You can pull a bale of hay from the barn to set yourself up with a right nice bed.”

Rory stopped abruptly and turned back toward her. When he didn’t make to restart his forward movement, Willow took this as a dismissal. “Thank you,” Willow said and wondered if she should leave. She was sure she could find the stables on her own anyway.

But Mr. Rory stopped her when she would have made to leave, turning back to her as if he’d overlooked something. Willow became nervous. Could he tell that she was different?

“How old did you say you were?”

“Sixteen”

Rory coughed up some phlegm and spit it on the ground and Willow imagined she saw a look of displeasure on his face. He was still looking at her intently and Willow was beginning to feel uncomfortable, but she held her ground under his scrutiny. If this was some kind of test she was going to pass. Willow hardened her features until she was sure her eyes were glaring just as brightly as an owl’s when caught in the firelight.

It must have worked because Rory’s face softened again and he laughed and then struck her hard on the back a few times for good measure. Willow had to push her heals into the grass under her feet to stop from toppling forward.

“The stables are over there.”

He pointed to a place Willow guessed was behind the cabins. “Thank you,” she said. As she walked away she steeled her chin. She’d made it.

**********************************************************************

Willow was bent over arranging the last of the hay she’d brought from the barn into a pallet on the dirt floor, when the sound of the tack room’s wooden door squeaked against its un-oiled hinges. The door was flung open, causing light to stream in unexpectedly.

Willow raised quickly to see a blonde haired girl standing there looking just as surprised to see her there as Willow must have looked to see her. There was a moment of stunned silence between them but Willow was the first to gather her wits enough to speak “Hey! I could have been undressing in here!” she said loudly, but instantly regretted the stricken look she’d caused in the blonde’s eyes.

“S-sorry”

The other girl looked down, and a curtain of hair fell in front of her face. And then she was turning to flee from the small room.

Willow groaned and followed behind the girl as she ran the length of the stables. “Hey…stop!” she called after the girl who was keeping steady pace ahead of her. Willow hadn’t meant to hurt her feelings, she’d simply been surprised by her. “Stop,” Willow called again as she trotted up behind the blonde.

The blonde stilled and Willow took that opportunity to catch up to her. “I didn’t mean anything…” she was speaking through panting breaths.

“I d-didn’t know anyone w-was in there.”

“It’s alright, really. What’s your name?” Willow said. She felt guilty for having been surprised into rudeness earlier.

“Tara.”

“Will.” Willow offered her hand and the blonde took it.

“Is that short for William?”

Willow shrugged and withdrew her hand. She said nothing more.

They walked back to the workers quarters in silence, parting ways just as they reached the cabins; Willow toward the stables, and the blonde in the opposite direction.

Willow didn’t watch the other girl leave, instead she headed straight for the tack room. Once she’d entered, she closed the door behind her. Scanning the small room, she found the handle from a broken straw- broom, and stuck it between the door handle and wall, to fashion a makeshift locking mechanism.

Willow was coming to fully realize just how tentative her placement at the MacLean Estate was. If she’d been unclothed when the girl had entered Willow was sure everything would’ve been over. She’d have to be more careful.

************************************************************************
“Why didn’t you tell me there was a boy in the tack room?!” Tara was furious. She’d sought out Mr. Rory with confrontation on her mind and had found him in the work shed. He stood with his back to her, putting away odds and ends while she seethed behind him.

“If you had come to me first before taking it upon yourself to go in there, I would have had a chance to tell you about the boy in the tack room.”

Rory was laughing heartily in the face of Tara’s irritation, which only furthered her annoyance with him. She said nothing more despite all the cutting remarks she could have made. When she didn’t speak again Rory turned back to her, humor twinkling in his eyes.

“You can be very headstrong at times, Miss Tara. Think of this as a lesson in prudence.”

Rory lifted his eyebrows at her, and Tara, having had enough, flung a watering can at him. Luckily, her aim was way off and the can missed his head by a mile. He smiled at her and Tara stuck her tongue out at him.

**********************************************************************
“Where were you?”

Tara flinched instinctively at the sound of her father’s voice. And thought she couldn’t see the man she could tell by the sound of his voice that he was angry. She looked down, quickly surveying the length of her dress. No dirt. Thank God. No dirt.

“I believe I asked you a question!”

Tara’s father came through the study door and into the foyer. Tara wondered if he’d been waiting in there for a long time. She could see the golden radiance from the setting sun as it streamed in through the foyer window; the light struck her father’s black boots, making them shine.

“U-um…I was…” She couldn’t think of what to say and she could tell that he was out for blood that day. She supposed it didn’t really matter what she said or didn’t say, because she knew he’d already formed his opinion of her day’s activities, and was only looking for confirmation.

**********************************************************************

Tara stood against the cold window with the heated skin of her cheek, where her father had struck her, pressed against the glass. She starred off in the distance, her eyes focusing on the workers quarters. She wished she could disappear.

**********************************************************************
Last edited by Emms on Thu Mar 16, 2006 11:06 pm, edited 6 times in total.
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby Sandman78 » Fri Mar 17, 2006 12:33 am

:bounce Yummy story line, I like where this is heading,and I can hardly wait for the next update. :-D You are truly an amazing writer. :bow :bow :bow
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby FineyMcFine » Sat Mar 18, 2006 4:13 am

Emms, I'm enjoying the story. The first thing I wanted to say about this update is the vivid way you write. I know I've said it before but the description is just so evocative - I can really see what you're talking about just from a couple of well-placed words. Specifically these two phrases caught my attention:

She’d always wanted to know what he kept buried in that dirty bag.


and

She thought the yellow glow of firelight would be pretty against a purple sky.


The description of eating the cabbage worms was also delightfully gross. Reminds me of the time I ate some aphids in my broccoli (although, thankfully, not broccoli worms).

Also, I love it that Tara walked in on Willow and 1. didn't track her as a girl right away and 2. talked with her a bit. She (Tara) sounds so lonely and isolated. There's definite potential for some kind of connection.
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby Willowtree252 » Sat Mar 18, 2006 7:04 am

Emmes you are just to talented for words I love every thing u write I go in serch for it can,t wait for updates on all your fic!!! :applause :applause :applause :applause :applause
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby caz » Sat Mar 18, 2006 1:04 pm

I've not left fb on this one before but I have been reading it.

Willow is so sweet in this one. Leaving home at an early age and managing to survive with Rainbow's help. They have become family for each other. I dread to think what would have happened to Willow if she'd have stayed with her birth parents.

Don't know a lot about Tara yet but she also is sweet. I like that she wants to help Rory and that she likes the servants, even though she gets punished if she is caught.

As for her Father - he's a complete bastard! It makes my blood boil to think that he has laid a hand on Tara. The man needs to REALLY suffer.

I think that Tara will soon find a friend in Willow.

Looking forward to your next update.

Caz
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby sweet_southern_sex_kitten » Sat Mar 18, 2006 1:09 pm

Im Watching this topic and every time I get a thingy sayin that its updated it said that this topic isnt here no more. :( Whats going on. Oh and I love this story so far. I want Tara and Willow goodness soon though. :wtkiss
Where is my Tara? :depressed
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby kindagay » Sun Mar 19, 2006 2:07 pm

Hi Emms :wave

I'm so sorry that it's taken me so long to get around to leaving feedback. I'm a bad kitten & must be punished :punish

Now that the apology is done with, lets talk about this wonderful fic of yours shall we? :)

Poor Ra, firstly, for having to accept & deal with the fact that he can no longer care & provide for the child that he took into his care; & secondly, for having to be left mostly alone (apart from the friend, who I do hope will drop in with food) when he's so ill.

The flashback was cute, although, I think I could have lived without this image...
She was glad she missed the dribble of green guts that sprang from the worm and dribbled down his chin, where it became entangled in his wiry, grey beard.
:) See, even the gross details are so wonderfully written. :lol

I loved the sweetly sentimental moment when Ra gave Willow the crystal castle - I'm thinking the castle is going to serve a wonderfully significant purpose. I love when small things like that have so much significance.

The history of the world was lain out before her everyday…it was written on the cobblestone streets, glistening with dirt and rain…it was written in blood on the walls of abandoned houses where feral children gathered. It was written in Willow’s blood and in Ra’s eyes less brilliant than before and heavy with age. She didn’t need a crystal trinket to tell her anything about the history of their world. She witnessed it made everyday.
I loved that part, it was so beautifully bittersweet. Such powerful imagery & such a strong impact - absolutely wonderful. :clap

So, I'm kinda curious about the man with only 3 fingers, shall we be meeting him again?

I must say, the mansion sounds very impressive.

She would have something to prove, and she knew it. She always had something to prove.
Will's had a very tough life, & now that she's in close contact with a lot of people it'll be even harder for her to hide the fact that she's a girl. I am looking forward to Tara finding out that particular piece of information though - that will make for an interesting read. :D

How come Tara was at the stables? :hmm Was she hiding from her father?

I'm glad Will ran after Tara to apologise for yelling.

I loved when Tara was yelling at Rory, she was so cute all furious like that, especially this part
Rory lifted his eyebrows at her, and Tara, having had enough, flung a watering can at him. Luckily, her aim was way off and the can missed his head by a mile. He smiled at her and Tara stuck her tongue out at him.
:) Absolutely adorable :lol

Poor Tara, I really don't like her father - do I get the feeling that there'll be lots of hiding out in the stables with the lovely Will in the future?

Emms, I must ask, where is Tara's mother? She is still around right?

Tara stood against the cold window with the heated skin of her cheek, where her father had struck her, pressed against the glass. She starred off in the distance, her eyes focusing on the workers quarters. She wished she could disappear.

That was such a heartbreaking image. Tara is gonna be okay yes? :paranoid

Okay sweetie, I'm done now, can't wait to read more :D

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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby AlysonGoddess » Sun Mar 19, 2006 6:27 pm

That dang father of hers hes the one that needs a beatin! ill beat him myself if i have to haha or at least i can try.. but yay loved the update and they finally met! wahoo! plz update soon!
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby Darth Pacula » Tue Mar 21, 2006 6:11 am

G'day, Emms.

Sorry I've taken so long to leave feedback. I blame it on my bone-idle laziness. I'd smack myself on the back of my hand, if I could be bothered to move.

I can't blame Willow for being scared for Ra; it sounds to me that he isn't long for this world. It's a sad fact of the world (even fictional ones) that the poor are usually more likely to die young, and Ra isn't even that young. The whole start of this update seemed to be him obliquely saying goodbye to Willow.

I liked the reference to cabbage worms; it's gross, but bugs are a good source of protein when you have a limited diet. Prisoners of war in the Japanese work camps found that out first hand.

She felt guilty about having stole it, but rationalized it by telling herself she would pay them back once she’d saved up a little money from her new job.


Now, it's good that Willow feels guilty about this, but I doubt she'll ever carry out her plan to repay for her theft. When you're as poor as she and Ra are, I have to imagine that you do what you have to do in order to survive, especially in this world that you've conjured. I actually hope she doesn't try to pay them back. I could see them stall owners trying to have her arrested anyway, as soon as she confessed.

Like some of the other Kittens, I've speculated on the meaning behind the crystal castle. I wonder if it might be the Butterfly Palace of the title? Though that could also refer to Tara's home, because Butterfly Palace subtly makes me think of a pretty prison, which is what Tara lives in.

Willow didn’t know what Ra was talking about. The history of the world was lain out before her everyday…it was written on the cobblestone streets, glistening with dirt and rain…it was written in blood on the walls of abandoned houses where feral children gathered. It was written in Willow’s blood and in Ra’s eyes less brilliant than before and heavy with age. She didn’t need a crystal trinket to tell her anything about the history of their world. She witnessed it made everyday.


Okay, that whole paragraph really spoke to me. Willow's heart-breaking cynicism is exactly what you should expect from someone who has lived the hard life she has.

I'm not the first to say it, but I liked that fact that you didn't take the whole 'fall-in-love-at-first-sight' route, because as nice as that is (see Imagine Me & You, for example) this feels more real, somehow. Still, Tara and Will(ow) have appeared on each others radar now, so let the plot percolations continue.

She wished she could disappear.


Hell, I wish I could make her father disappear. Preferably into a wood chipper. >:) Great update, Emms. Please do keep them coming.

Cheers,
Paul.
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby Emms » Wed Mar 22, 2006 10:35 am

Hi everyone! Replies are next. I wanted to get the update posted first though. ;-)

[center]Image[/center]

Chapter Seven

All Disclaimers Apply

The next few days were filled to the brim with backbreaking labor, as Willow quickly learned to redefine her definition of hard work. By the time each evening came she was too exhausted to do more than fall onto her pallet and kick her boots off. That very night was no exception.

She hadn’t thought of the blonde girl--Tara, she reminded herself, since their hasty meeting, and subsequent retreat on that first day. But now that Willow lay there, swamped in the stillness of the musty tack room air, she did allow images of the days past to enter her thinking space.

She could recall that Tara had been wearing a fancy looking gown of blues and creams that day in the woods, which, now that she thought about it more, caused her to figure that Tara must’ve belonged to the main house in some capacity, most likely as the daughter of DonAldo, as Willow had never seen a serving wench dress so expensively.

Willow had yet to see DonAldo in person, but from the bits and pieces of dialogue that she had been able to pick up from the other workers, he was not someone anyone would want to be around.

Willow thought about Ra, and wondered how he was getting along without her, and was suddenly overcome with worry. She’d never been away from him for this long and missed him terribly. She wondered if he missed her just as much.

And then, as tired as she was, Willow knew she would make the trek to Blackfoot that very night. She just had to see him with her own two eyes. She had to make sure he was alright. She would suffer tomorrow though, from lack of sleep, but she knew she had to go.

*********************************************************
Tara ran towards the safety of the woods. She didn’t know where her father was and quite frankly she didn’t care. Something in her spirit told her that he wouldn’t catch her this time, and Tara trusted in that voice more than she trusted in anything else.

Tara’s arm hurt where it had caught on her father’s ring, but she didn’t notice the blood leaking from the gash, even as it soaked through the satin sleeve of the expensive gown she wore.

Her head ached but her legs were in tact and they could carry her the distance required to make it to the special place, that lay just beyond the woods.

**********************************************************
Willow took the western route around the perimeter of the woods. She’d already tried the gate and found it locked, and the sharp points along its crest hadn’t exactly beckoned her over the top. But not being one to give up easily, she decided to make the trek through the woods to see if she could find another way out--one less pointed.

It would have been impossible for her to get away during the day, what with all the work she had to do in the workers quarters, so nightfall was her only chance to make it to Ra. And even though she had nothing to show for her hard work, as she had yet to receive any money, she knew Ra would be pleased to see her none the less.
**********************************************************
Tara stood at the edge of the protruding rock that made up her special place. A river of rushing water foamed and roared past jagged rocks fifty feet below. She could feel the cool air as it traveled over her skin to caress the delicateness of her bare legs. Her dress pressed against the upper portion of her body while she held her skirts above her thighs. Her body trembled as the feeling of freedom she so craved began to overtake her.

She’d never felt as free as she did with the wind whipping past her with nothing but sky on above her. She loved heights. She loved to feel free. She loved the hear the eagles call to each other as they soared above the cliffs. She’d always been told that Eagles were solitary animals, but Tara knew their secret language she knew why they loved the clouds.

**********************************************************
As Willow neared the edge of the woods she could just make out the illuminated glow from the moon. It reflected against the soft paleness of skin; of bare legs. Willow moved deeper into the shadows.

She recognized Tara right away, and found herself completely mesmerized for the first time in her life as she watched the other girl standing there on the rock. She’d never seen another girl’s legs unclothed before and she was drawn to the soft curve of Tara’s bare thigh…

But in the next instant everything changed. Willow saw the girl’s foot leave the rock and the wind blow past enough to knock her from the ledge. Willow panicked. She had a horrible image of what would happen next if she didn’t do something. Without thinking, Willow made a dash for the girl.

Willow caught Tara around the waist just as she might have slipped from the rock.

“What are you doing?!”

Tara was fighting against Willow’s hold, and the redhead had to set her foot sternly against the rock to keep them both on the ledge.

And even though they were precariously perched, Willow felt the need to answer the other girl‘s question. “Would it be apropos to suggest to you that I’m saving your life?” Willow’s words were muffled by Tara’s back and she was out of breath from the dash she’d made to clear the distance between them.

“Saving my life? Are you out of your head?!” Tara recognized her captor’s voice right away, having had spent each night since their meeting reliving the embarrassment she’d felt upon having had walked in on him in the tack room that day. But Tara was more irritated at having her wind-blown meditation interrupted than she was embarrassed by the state of her undress. There would be time for embarrassment later.

Tara struggled to get free of his grasp, but his hands held her tightly about the waist and she knew any further struggle would be futile and most likely end in either or both of them plummeting from the rock to their certain death below. Tara stilled her movements.

“Well what would you call it, then?” Willow held her tighter than before, still half afraid the girl would fall.

“Assault,” Tara shot back.

Willow hesitantly released her grasp on the blonde and took a step back. The blonde turned to look at her and Willow fell silent. Could it be possible that she had been mistaken about the girl’s intentions? Yes, it was indeed possible. Likely even. Still, Willow couldn’t help but try and defend her hasty actions. “What do you expect a man to do when he sees a damsel in distress…?” Willow, who’d never been bashful in her life, was now blushing.

“I expect him to mind his own business,” Tara scowled at the boy and was pleased to see she’d made him blush.

Usually Willow wouldn’t be one to argue with words such as those--having her own secrets to keep, she understood quite well ones need for privacy, but her eye caught the sight of blood on the girl’s arm which counter-acted any thoughts she might have had about leaving things as they were . “You’re bleeding.” She said almost to herself.

“So it seems…” Tara turned her face away from Will’s prying eyes, noticing her own blood for the first time since she’d fled the main house that night. Tara felt a tear escape down her cheek. She wouldn’t tell this boy about her father and the things he did to her. She was too ashamed. She hoped Will didn’t ask any questions.

Willow didn‘t miss the tear that wet the other girl‘s cheek and it made her heart squeeze in her chest. Crying had never really bothered Willow much throughout her life, as she’d never done much of her own, but this girl‘s tears seemed to bring out a side of Willow she previously never even thought about existing. A fearsome side that gave her cause to worry. “Do you want to tell me what happened? Or shall I conjure up an imaginary dragon to slay?” Willow tried for a tentative smile but the other girl remained stoic.

Willow tore a piece of her own shirt from hem of the garment, and dipped it into the bit of water that had collected on the stone nearest them. Then with her finger, she pushed up to form a point under the cloth. After tearing a space in the sleeve of Tara’s gown, Willow dabbed lightly at the blooded area to cleanse the wound. The blonde flinched at her touch and Willow pulled back, but quickly resumed her task when the girl made no further retreat.

Tara took that moment of silence between them to look at Will in more detail. She thought he had fine features and the most exquisite green eyes she’d ever seen. There was a softness in his touch that Tara had never known from a man and it took the breath from her lungs, but only partially.

“I wasn’t going to jump,” Tara spoke quietly. She was ashamed that Will had caught her the way he had. She really hadn’t intended to harm herself. She’d simply wanted to feel the wind from the cliff whip against her body. She’d done that since she was a child--stood at the cliff to feel the wind. It grounded her in a way nothing else could. But Will wouldn’t understand this. For all he knew she’d been trying to jump to her death.

“Didn’t look that way from where I stood.” Willow stated simply, though she could tell the girl was telling the truth.

**********************************************************
Willow continued on her way, after assuring herself that the other girl was in no harm. They parted company much in the same way they had after their first encounter--each going their separate way without so much as another word between them, though this time Willow did look back once to get another glimpse of the girl.

Tara was just out of sight when Willow heard the noise of a horse clomping through the vegetation. She could hear the steady clamor of its hooves against the dried leaves on the ground. She could tell its full bodied weight was headed directly toward her.

Willow didn’t know who the man on the horse was, but she could already tell she didn’t care for him. She stared up at him where he sat towering above her as if it was the only way he knew to make himself look bigger, more formidable. She thought maybe he might have been over compensating for something…perhaps a small manhood.

“Where exactly do you think you’re going?”

The man looked down at her with contempt. The moonlight illuminated the crest he wore on the arm of his riding jacket. She recognized it to be the MacLean crest right away because it was stamped on most everything in the workers quarters. She decided this horrible man must be DonAldo MacLean

Willow said nothing, simply staring the man down as his glare attempted to penetrate the exterior of her. Any plans she had made to see Ra that night fell away. She got the distinct impression that she would be going no where that night.

“Apparently you are not clear on how this works. You are under the legal age for employment. We paid a large sum to your guardian to acquire you.”

Willow was confused, how did this man even know who she was when she‘d never seen him before in her life? And more importantly how did he know about Ra?

“It is the only reason you are here. You are indentured to me until your 21st year. I own you.”

Willow spoke for the first time. “No one told me…Ra…he didn’t say anything.” Willow was near panic. She’d rushed into something and had made a dreadful mistake. Suddenly thoughts of money fell from her mind and all she wanted to do was go home. If she followed the river north where she’d manhandled the girl she was sure she could make it home within a few hours.

DonAldo shrugged his shoulders and kicked the side of his horse. “You will not leave these grounds unless I instruct you to do so. Do I make myself clear?”

Willow glared at him. And DonAldo glared back. But his eyes softened momentarily when next he spoke.

“You haven’t by chance happened upon my daughter while out on this evening’s adventure, have you? She seems to have gotten away from me.”

Willow knew he was talking about Tara. She felt a shiver pass through her body and could sense an unease in the pit of her stomach. She remembered the blood on the girl’s arm and squared her chin. What she really wanted to say was “go to hell.” but she knew she wouldn’t.

“Very well.”

He made a move as if satisfied that Willow hadn’t seen his daughter, but spoke again, almost as an afterthought.

“I trust whatever happened between you and your guardian was in your best interests.”

Willow stared at him unblinking wishing he would go away, even though it was clear he wasn‘t finished..

“And if you were to run away…well, I’d be forced to repossess the money I paid for you. One way or the other.”

Willow gulped. She knew he was threatening her, but there was nothing she could do about it. She realized that if she tried to do anything he would kill Ra, and she couldn’t let that happen. She didn’t fully understand what had happened with Ra but she did know that he would have only done what he thought best. And it answered a lot of questions she’d had about his behavior the day she left.

As DonAldo rode off toward the main estate Willow fumed after him. Her calmness suddenly replaced with anger, denial, and the desperate need to connect with Ra. What DonAldo had said couldn’t have been true. Ra would never indenture her and abandon her. She had to find a way to get to him

Willow vowed she would have no more to do with DonAldo or any of his kin for as long as she was a prisoner there.

TBC
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby kindagay » Wed Mar 22, 2006 4:53 pm

Oh, update! :bounce :D :dance

You posted right as I was logging off to go to work, so I didn't even have time to dib, but, unless someone jumps in & posts before me (which, considering how much I ramble, is quite likely) I am gonna be the first person to leave you proper feedback - 'cos Irene just jumped in & sang & that's cheating. :P

Okay, I've stopped being a big kid now, time for the feedback. :D

Hi sweetie, :wave
How's things? Hope everything's okay. :)

Aww, poor Willow, all that hard work's gotta be taking it's toll on her; & it must be so hard for her being away from Ra too. :aww
She wondered if he missed her just as much.
I'm sure he does.

& poor Tara, all hurt & scared & needing to run to safety. :aww

She’d already tried the gate and found it locked, and the sharp points along its crest hadn’t exactly beckoned her over the top
Yikes, sounds scary, I think that I would not like to work there.

Tara stood at the edge of the protruding rock that made up her special place. A river of rushing water foamed and roared past jagged rocks fifty feet below. She could feel the cool air as it traveled over her skin to caress the delicateness of her bare legs. Her dress pressed against the upper portion of her body while she held her skirts above her thighs. Her body trembled as the feeling of freedom she so craved began to overtake her.

She’d never felt as free as she did with the wind whipping past her with nothing but sky on above her. She loved heights. She loved to feel free. She loved the hear the eagles call to each other as they soared above the cliffs. She’d always been told that Eagles were solitary animals, but Tara knew their secret language she knew why they loved the clouds.
Okay, I know that that's a rather large quote, but, WOW! :bow That whole part was just, wow! There's not other word for it - I loved, loved, loved it. :)

Oh, naughty Will, looking at Tara's unclothed legs - scandalous! :lol

“Would it be apropos to suggest to you that I’m saving your life?”
“Saving my life? Are you out of your head?!”
:rofl That whole exchange was just hilarious. It was brilliant, all of it, especially with the struggling & the holding, simply brilliant! :clap

& it was very sweet of Will to be all worried about Tara, & then to worry again when she noticed that Tara was bleeding - grr to DonAldo :angry

Willow didn‘t miss the tear that wet the other girl‘s cheek and it made her heart squeeze in her chest. Crying had never really bothered Willow much throughout her life, as she’d never done much of her own, but this girl‘s tears seemed to bring out a side of Willow she previously never even thought about existing. A fearsome side that gave her cause to worry. “Do you want to tell me what happened? Or shall I conjure up an imaginary dragon to slay?”
Aww, me thinks Will has the teeny beginings of a crush? :x It's so sweet! :)

Tara took that moment of silence between them to look at Will in more detail. She thought he had fine features and the most exquisite green eyes she’d ever seen. There was a softness in his touch that Tara had never known from a man and it took the breath from her lungs, but only partially.
Hmm, me thinks Tara has the teeny beginings of a crush too. :x

Yikes! That was a scary exchange between Will & DonAldo - :angry

She thought maybe he might have been over compensating for something…perhaps a small manhood.
OhMyGod! :rofl :lol :lmao I LOVED that!

But, back to the seriousness & badness of DonAldo.
Willow was confused, how did this man even know who she was when she‘d never seen him before in her life? And more importantly how did he know about Ra?
Good questions.
So, Ra sold Will to the MacLeans? Well, I guess he probably thought he was doing what was best, he can no longer care for Will the way she needs, so he found her lodgings, food & work - he had her best interests at heart, I hope that Will figures that out.

I hope that Will gets to talk to Ra somehow, & preferably sometime soon too.

Willow vowed she would have no more to do with DonAldo or any of his kin for as long as she was a prisoner there.
Why do I get the feeling that that might change in the not too distant future?
I am looking forward to seeing how the Willow/Tara relationship progresses in this story, I'm positive that it will make for an extremely interesting read - as all of your stories do. :D

Okay, I'm done with the ramble now. :)

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Jeanne
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Re: The Butterfly Palace

Postby AlysonGoddess » Wed Mar 22, 2006 5:41 pm

Dun Dun Dun... I really wish i could take a shot gun to that mans head! But ya know im sweet n innocent so i cant.. but yay willow and tara contact very nice! :) i really wonder where ur going with this.. i hope it turns out good but im sure theryll be some angst..well i hope :) cuz angst is a fun thing.. but yeah im all full of charcoal so it would be in my best interest to take a shower before i get the comp full of charcoal so great update and plz update soon!
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