hey everyone one, xmas hols gave me loads of time to write, so i have a decent sized update for you all YAY.
Rose: hey thankx for reading my fic, glad you like it. no i'm not a closet lesbian
tnhankx for ya FB
Stace: stop encoraging her, lol, glad you likes the update. yep anya and xnader goodness hehe hope you like the next update!
Disclaimer: I don't own Buffy, or the characters, blah blah blah, dnt sue me ok?
Title: What Went Wrong?
Author: Jess
Rating: Should really be something like PG-13 becuase I don't nwo where to put it, but it's still a violent, meh.
Plot: *Ahem*...fighting, angst, romance, more fighting till the death, who will win? (Good ending promise, dnt kill me!)
Feedback: Tell me the truth so I know if I should bother finishing the story as I go along...Wired Vixen (friend) said it was a good idea so I hope you like it too...^^
Author's Note: Ok this will be a little confusing if you don't really understand it now. Basically, the text in normal font is like narration, the text in bold is Willow's POV and the text in italic's is Tara's POV. Flashback's are indicated with these: < and >. Enjoy!
Also, I don't own the Alyson Krauss song nestled in here either.
Tara ran her finger slowly down the open pages like she was trying to draw out the pages secerts with a simple touch. A dark comment spurred into her mind: 'Touching always got secrets out of Willow'. Her lips curled into a seductive smile as she thought those words. Tara blinked and let the thought run through her so she could look back at the book. She ran her eyes over the text and found the words of the spell ring a warning signal in her mind. She knew what it was, even though she had never seen it before. Tara sat down with her head spinning.
"Woah, deja vous..." whispered Tara as she felt goosebumps form on her arms. She shook herself as chills ran up her spine, letting her go basck to her reading.
It was a spell...to unlock your hidden power, your potencial.
"That sounds cool..." smiled Tara, suddenly realising what book she was reading, making her mentally slap herself. She couldn't let herself get tempted...even if it did sound awesome. Tara ran her fingers across the writting and read the spell in her mind. Just reading it was giving her a buzz. The mark on her chest stung again, making her grab her chest and drop the book from her lap onto the floor with a loud bump. The woman at hte counter looked up at her.
"Are you okay?" she asked quickly, seeing the Tara was holding onto her chest. Tara blinked and looked at the woman in the eye then nodded.
"Yeah..." stammered Tara as she took in a deep breath to calm herself down "Yeah, I'm fine,"
The woman watched her for a moment, then seeing her pick up her book again and start reading she looked away, busying herself with bits and pieces. Suddenly a woman came into the shop and she turned to smile at the new customer. Tara took no notice.
"Hi, Welcome to the Magic Shop...oh Hey! Its you, nice to see you again," smiled the woman as she reconised the woman entering the door and looking around then at the owner of the shop.
"Hey, good to see you again too," she replied "Do you have the stuff I ordered yet?"
The woman shook her head and shruged. "Sorry Amy, I don't yet, they're taking ages to deliver all the things I've ordered for the shop. I'll call them tonight and see what's taking so long,"
"Hey, don't worry about it, no rush, but cool, don't be too hard on them," ahe chuckled back as she walked down the steps and towards the table. She pulled of her jacket and slung it next to another one already lying neatly on the back of a chair. Amy looked around for the owner. Seeing Tara in the corner of the shop, reading a book was no odd sight...but seeing her in the corner she would never enter and reading the same book she had given Willow. That was rich. Amy couldn't help but smile at her victory. She had gotten to Willow, and now she would be able to get at her other half.
Amy walked slowly up to the blonde sitting in the corner and sat herself next to her. Tara still took no notice. Amy waited for a moment the tapped Tara on the side. Tara blinked then looked up at the brunette looking back at her. Her eyes narrowed as she saw who it was.
"Amy..." Tara said a little surprised to see her. And a little annoyed. She was the person Willow was out all night with before they argued at the Bronze and Tara left to give Willow space. Tara could feel hatred already bubbling inside of her becuase of the way she had taken Willow from her.
"Hey Tare, how are you?"
"Don't call me Tare, it's Tara," she snapped back quickly, trying hard not to sound too annoyed. Amy held up her hands and corrected herself.
"Okay fine, Tara, what are you doing down here, I never thought I'd see you in this part of the shop,"
"Just doing some research," replied Tara, now sounding a little innocent. Like she wanted to sound.
"Just like Willow did..." smiled Amy as she rememberd looking through the window of the sop one day and seeing the redhead in the corner, her eyes glued to the book. Tara's innocent look was quickly snatched away and she slammed the book shut and put it on the floor.
"What do you want Amy? Huh? Do you want to sit there and gloat at how you pulled Willow away from me? OR that you pushed her to the dark arts? Maybe you just want to sit there and watch me wonder at how it could have happened and laugh at me? What do you want Amy?!"
Amy moved away from her as Tara asked her questions in a stern voice. She had never seen Tara react so quickly before, she definately had changed since she had last seen her.
"Just came to see you get tempted just like Willow did, you know its a buzz Tare, don't think I don't know, after all I was the one who got Willow hooked..." smiled Amy as she pointed at herself to make herself look like she was a great witch rather then the scum that she was. Tara gritted her teeth, and without saying another word, Tara slapped her. Hard. Amy's face flew to the side as her hand pulled it to the floor.
"Bitch!"
Amy pushed herself from the floor and loked up at Tara with narrow eyes. She held onto her face and stumbled to the floor. Tara stayed sitting down and stared at her and she walked towards her jacket and quickly jogged out of the room. As the door glided shut, Tara took a deep sigh smiled to herself.
"That felt good," she thought to herself "Wish it hadn't,"
The woman quickly looked around at she heard a slap and a door close, only to see Amy had left in a hurry and Tara was smiling to herself. She shook her head and left for the basement.
"Weird..."
Tara picked up the book again and looked once more at page 683. She read about everything that it would do to someone. It would awaken the hidden power in someone, but it had side effects. One's that the book didn't make clear before. Tara turned the page and there was a warning about the spell before. Willow had obviously missed out this part.
'A warning to all who use this spell, awaken this power and you awaken hell, somethings are better left hidden, so be weary if you let loose the forbidden'
Tara felt sick that Willow had never read this warning. Then again, Willow may have read it and ignored the warning. Tara looked at the spell and the warning again then looked out into the outside of the shop. How was she going to defeat Willow? she had awakened hell, and wanted it. Tara remembered her dream. Willow was making her see the power of the dark side. But before she slapped her, she was...normal. She was acting like she had done before she had seen Amy. Sensitive, honest, scared? Tara could't understand it. Slowly an idea came to her head.
What if WIllow, her Willow, had never left her body at all. What if she had jus awakened her own demons and was now fighting against herself? Tara took in a breath as she thought of the possibility that Willow was still in there. Suddenly she sighed and shook her head.
"Thats a stupid idea, a spell like this wouldn't do that, it would kill you, or change you, it wouldn't split you between yourself,"
Tara wanted to cry. Even after seeing a spell that Willow had used to change, she couldn't understand what Willow was doing that night she did move on to what she was now.
Who would sell their soul for love?
Or waste one tear on compromise?
Should be easy enough
To know a heartache in disguise
Tara slid the book back into its place and walked towards her jacket. The woman returned from the basement and saw her ready to leave. She put the boxes on the table and watched TAr upt her jacket back on. The warmth the jacket gave Tara was a quick comfort from the cold of the outside world.
"Going already? Did you find what you were looking for?" asked the woman as she Tara looking down at her jacket and trying to fidle with the zip. Tara looked up and gave up with her zip.
"Oh...I-I did thanks, I have to go, I'll see you around," replied Tara bluntly then walking out of the door.
But the heart rules the mind
And the going gets rough
Pride takes the fall
When you find that kinda love
Tara sighed as she left the shop and could feel her eyes burning. She pushed back the tears and walked down the street with her arms hugging her body. She felt stupid. She wanted to find Willow again, just sitting there and welcomingher home, that she gave herself the idea that Willow might still be there. But she couldn't be could she? Tara had seen her Willow that night when she was dancing, but that wasn't really her, it was just...her. Willow, evil extrodinare. And her mind had played games with her again, letting herself fall for her.
I can't help feeling like a fool
Since I lost that place inside
Where my heart knew its way
And my soul was ever wise
Walking further down the street, Tara started to remember times when she and Willow were fine. They were in love, so much in love that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with her. Her Willow Tree. She smiled as she remember that she had called her that once before. But it still wasn't enough to make her feel better. She was lost now, her heart had been taken away with Willow, and she was still holding onto it.
Once innocence was lost
There was not faith enough
Still my heart held on
When it found that kinda love
Tara still loved Willow, but not the one alive now, her Willow, the old Willow. She bit her lip as she thought about how much she missed seeing her everyday. Seeing her in the morning, and kissing her goodnight. Holding her in her arms as she fell asleep next to her, whispering to her how muc hshe loved her. Waking up from Willow kissing her on the forehead then smiling at her. she wished she could go back to those memories.
Though beauty is rare enough
But still we trust
Somehow we'll find it there
With no guarentee
Its seems to me
At least it should be fair
Tara looked up and stared at the sky above her. It was a brilliant blue with whisps of white forming blurs of white in the sky. Why couldn't she go back to theose memories? What was holding her back? Obviously, the old Willow had changed and she would never be able to see her in the same light again, but that didn't mean that she had to stay way from her forever. If her dream was right, there was still innocence in her.
"But it was just a dream," chocked Tara as she pushed at the temples of her head, causing a minor headache. She rolled her eyes and pryed away the pain. Was it Willow holding her back from living happily again, or was it her?
But if it's only tears and pain
Isn't it still worth the cause?
Like some sweet saving grace
Or a river we must cross
Was it her that was holding her back? She didn't want to think it was her. Afterall, she thought she was doing the right thing. TRying to bring back Willow. But what if she could never do it. If she would fail to do what she was hoping for. She would die if that happened. That was why she was holding onto it so much. But what if she didn't need to bother chaging Willow, but change herself to fit with the times. To fit with the changing world.
If we don't understand
What this life is made of
We learn the truth
When we find that kinda love
No. It couldn't be. She wouldn't chage. Not for the evil inside Willow. It was her fault that she was like this now. She needed to deal with the consquences of her actoins. Even if it did affect Tara. She wasn't about to bend down to the will of something like Willow's demons. What was she saying? That she hated Willow now? How did she change her feelings that fast? Tara shook her head to stop thinking anymoreon the subject and walked home. Fidling with her zip again. It clicked shut and she pulled it up to close her jacket and bask in the warmth it provided.
Cos when innocense is lost
There is not faith enough
We leran the truth
When we find that kinda love
Tara finally reached home and unlocked the door and walked in. Her house felt empty and lonely. It always had done but more now then ever. Tara slipped off her jacket again and rubbed her hands to warm them up. She looked around and could her echo's of Willow's voice. Chills ran up her spine as she felt like she was being watched again. She quickly looked around, hoping that she wouldn't find any surprises in her home. Luckly she didn't so she took in a deep, reliveing breath and sighed. Her eyes were burning again. Tara yawned and walked upstairs to wash her face. A quick burst of cold water was sure to wake her up. She waltzed upstairs and washed her face then looked at herself in the mirror opposite. She saw how pale she looked now, drained emotionally and physically. Then it remined her that she was hungry. She just been out for a coffee for breakfast and she was hungry? she looked at the time and saw that it was now past lunch time. No surprise there. She had spent ages walking around outside. She rolled her eyes and stretched when she heard a knock at hte door.
Tar walekd downstairs and opened the door. Nothing. Confused she closed the door again and saw a small white envelope lying on the floor. She picked it up and saw it just had her name on it. It wasn't regular mail. That was what the knocking was about. She flipped it over and saw a small black robbon, tied into a bow stuck on the back. Thinking it was adorable, she carefully pulled it off and held onto it as she opened hte letter.
Inside was a small piece of paper. She opened it up and read out what it said.
'You've had enough time now, we will finish what we started tonight. At the old church. I'll be waiting for you Tara'
It was from Willow. Tara looked again at the bow she was holding in her hand and thought that will had made this. She thought to herself then decided that she didn't care who it was from, it was adorable. She took the note and the bow and laid them on the table near the front door.
"Tonight eh? I'll see you then Willow,"
hope you like kittens! byeee :kitten
Jess xxx
'You're my angel of salvation, and hope, and strength...your my multi-angel'-Jay (My baby)
.:~*My anime site*~:.
by tarawhipped » Fri Nov 05, 2004 5:30 pm 
-Cameron 
I'm writting more, I hope this helps to save moi, you said it might lol. Enjoy!
Classic Jess humour! great!!
at: 11/25/04 11:45 pm
me I love these rich and complex characters you have created and while they seem to hate each other you can still percieve there level of love because as they say you have to love someone to hate them any way hope to see more soon 
That was just all kinds of creepy. But in a really cool, 'what's gonna happen next' sort of way. Once again it seems like there's no way Tara can stop whatever evil thing is in Willow (how come none of the other Scoobies are helping out, anyway?). And now Willow's going after Tara in her dreams and trying to make her bad too?!
This is a very upsetting story. But i love it!! And i feel for tara, and her burning eyes, made me have burny eyes.... *sniffle* I think Tara should kill amy, but you wont tell me anyway, i have to wait, i thought having a best friend would give me answ-oh...hi!....*trails off*
So I'll see you all soon Kitten's! 
You can't leave it like that! 
The only solution is to update soon!! 
yay and I have FB too double yay!!
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