Aly - glad to see you enjoyed your weekend, even if a little too much
Hey even after it ends doesn't mean to say there wont be a sequel if there's enough demand for it
Okay now for the update, i watched seeing red last night for the first time and am still rather disdraught over it all. I've totally lost respect for Joss not only for the way he killed of Tara but for then general direction he's taken all the characters this season. I didn't like Spike last night which is bad because he is normally my fav after our girls. As for Xander i no longer find him annoying, instead i totally dislike the character he has become. Surprisingly though i liked Dawn in last nights ep, a first for a long time. Anyway it caused me to rethink some of the direction i was gonna take with this fic although not a lot. I've compensated for last nights horror ending for one that should leave a smile on everyone's face. Anyway enough of my rambling, without much further ado....
Title - More than a Feeling
Author’s Name - Nathan
Rating - M15+ recommended for mature viewing audience. But hey I’m not ya mum so I ain’t gonna spank ya, unless ya want me too.
Disclaimer - These Char’s belong to Joss and ME and totally not mine.
Also title is also a song by Boston but so also listen to it if you get the chance cause its good.
Feedback - Totally, unless you don’t wanna say anything, but u could if u wanted to.
Summary - Totally AU, this fic doesn’t have a hellmouth, demons the weekly apocalypse or even vamp’s for that fact. It’s set the summer before senior high (I may not be a Yank but I’m pretty sure I know how ya calendar runs). Oh yeah lots of Willow & Tara goodness.
Part 14 I believe were up to. Some more cuteness to be had I’m sure.Willow and Buffy sat in the Espresso Pump chatting about what they got up to on their weekends, Willow was being unbelievably vague but Buffy was to busy talking about her weekend to take much notice.
“I think something is definitely going on between Giles and my mom.” Willow’s head shot out of her reverie as she took in what her blonde friend was saying.
“What no, I mean people that old don’t even do that sort of stuff do they?” Willow was reluctant to put two people she thought of as secondary parents into any sort of non-Platonic way. It was like imagining a romantic evening between her own parents and no good could come of that. “Are you sure, you could just be imagining things, making things up that aren’t real?” Willow reasoned with Buffy.
“Nah, I thought that at first when they were just acting all weird. Then when I found them making out in the lounge room when they thought I wasn’t watching kinda freaked me out.” Buffy answered.
“Ewwww, I can’t believe your mom and Giles have a thing, any idea on how long it’s been going on?” Willow asked out of curiosity.
“I kinda bolted and didn’t ask any questions. Mom tried to fill me in today but I told her what her and Gile’s did in their time I didn’t want to hear.” Buffy replied with a smile on her face.
“It could be worse I suppose. She could be dating Mr. William.” Willow teased and got a gagging response from across the table. “Giles is nice enough and well we all know how hard it is to be alone sometimes.” Willow once again went into her reason voice but this time there was a touch of sorrow about it.
Buffy also suddenly remembered her own love life’s dire need of an additional person. The emptiness feeling showing clearly on her face. “So how was your weekend with Tara, any news to report?” Buffy asked trying to get her mind of her own loneliness.
“Not much, well except for one tiny itty bit of information.” Willow said as she brought her thumb and index finger together to indicate just how insignificant the piece of info was.
“What do tell, you wouldn’t just leave me hanging like this would you?” Buffy asked rather excitedly, She was hoping Willow’s news would help her to feel better.
“You’re probably not going to want to hear it.” Willow stated, still kinda nervous about it. She had been thinking about it a lot since she got home from the weekend and she had to tell somebody. It’d been building for sometime now and she figured the way things were going it was an inevitability anyway.
“What is it, you don’t just say you have info and then not spill, no matter how small it is.” Buffy stated, pushing the redhead for some much-needed answers.
“I’m in love with Tara.” Willow simply stated as she looked up into the shocked face of her best friend.
“Small like a sperm whale Will, I guess I should be happy for you but you don’t seem over the moon yourself. What’s bothering you?” Buffy asked out of concern.
“Believe me when I say I am deliriously happy, that’s what love is, I’m just kinda confused about the whole situation. Were at a stage in our lives where it’s probably the worst possible time to fall in love but you know they say love works in mysterious ways.” Willow said as a meek smile made it’s way across her face.
“You can talk to me Will I ain’t going anywhere anytime soon, I wanna help you work this out.” Buffy said as she placed her hand on the redhead’s in the middle of the table.
“It’s like we talked about before with the college thing, she’s so much a part of my life I just don’t want her out of it, and that may end up effecting us with what school we go to next year and everything. I’m not even sure she feels the same way. This could be like a nice little fling until she gets to college and hops back on the boy town express.” Willow said dejectedly, her meek smile no longer able to sustain itself.
“Hey Will I told you it’d be a gamble and I’m not yet convinced that it wont pay of big, I mean it’s great your in love, you don’t know how lucky you are to be in that position. When push comes to shove if you have to pick between Tara and top of the line education I’m sure you’ll be happy whatever you do. I’m not even saying there will be a choice because we all know how smart Tara is and the options are limitless.” Willow’s smile came on a bit stronger this time as her friend’s words sunk in. Buffy wasn’t always the sharpest knife in the drawer but when it was needed Buffy could be a pretty cluey girl.
“I am lucky aren’t I? I mean here’s me trying to think like six months in the future when I should just be worried about now. I can’t dictate what’s gonna happen although I can’t stop thinking about it. Maybe the reason I can’t stop thinking about the future with Tara is because I really want her in mine.” Willow said with all seriousness, her heartfelt emotion could be felt quite easily across the table by Buffy.
“I’m sure you do, and I’m sure she feels the same way, I think maybe she should be the one you should be talking to Will.” Buffy smiled at Willow, Willow knew Buffy was right and just returned the smile.
“Thanks Buffy, for everything, just listening and helping through all this has made it all so much easier.” Willow said squeezing on the blonde’s hands.
“That’s what best friends are for.”
…………
“So did you tell your little orgasm friend that you’re in love with her yet?” Anya asked as they walked down the interior of the local shopping mall.
“What Anya, she isn’t an orgasm friend she’s my girlfriend.” Tara blushed but proudly smiled at the fact.
“Same difference if you ask me, I know you two do it more than Xander and I do and that really pisses me off missy.” Anya said in a firm yet caring manner. Her response only caused Tara’s blush to deepen and her smile spread from ear to ear.
“Aghhh, I knew it, Xander is just so blah with the stamina, what’s the longest time you and Willow have done it for?” Anya asked sincerely, hoping to compare lovers.
“Anya!” Tara retorted, her blush ever deepening. “Three hours forty two minutes.” She shot over to the now open mouthed brunette.
“How can that be, Xander can hardly go ten minutes, he went about twenty five once on a real good day but those are few and far between.” Anya said in her state of shock.
“Oh me and Willow normally and hour at minimum, she is like an animal, she must practice yoga or something with her stamina supply because she always needs to go more than once.” Tara was talking comfortably now, she respected Anya in that she could say anything to her and not be embarrassed. She was amazed at how popular Anya was at school despite the fact she totally lacked shame, which would often keep someone out of trouble. She rationalised that the kids at school maybe respected her as well. If she didn’t like you she would just say it to your face and leave you alone. Tara was often still shocked at the words that came out of her friend’s mouth but never surprised. She also felt that she could say anything to her friend without fear of whiplash, as she knew Anya liked it when people were forthright with her.
“That is so typical of Xander, he gets the job done once and thinks that it’s finished.” She huffed her disappointment.
“So you thinking of switching teams An? I think I might know a few girl’s who’d be interested.” Tara teased, her smile perked up on one side of her face.
“What no, I love Xander…. Who exactly do you think would be interested in me… for instance sake?” Anya clarified, curious as to who the blonde thought might be playing on the other side of the field.
“Well their’s Cordy, she’s boyfriendless, a vegetarian, she only has photo’s of us in her locker and she’s all with the extra hugs.” Tara rationalised, trying to make a stereotypical point. Anya started giggling at the blonde.
“She’s also totally into Donnie. Believe me when I say if she got the chance to stick her tongue down his throat she would.” Tara’s shock look returned Anya was talking about her little brother now.
“No, not Donnie, he is young and naive and totally not ready to date.” Tara reasoned to her friend. It however only caused her friend’s giggling to become more intense.
“I think over protective older sister maybe the naive one here, he has girls swooning all over him all the time. He is the star player for the football team Tara, this is high school, not hard to put two and two together.” Anya managed to blurt out between her giggling fits.
“Okay say for instance I am the older naive sister here, could you pretend like he’s young, naive and not ready to date to put the older sister’s worrying nerves to rest.” Tara pleaded with her puppy dog eyes and pout taking shape, causing Anya to wilt.
“Okay Donnie’s probably to absolved in football to think about dating and girls and the such. Like all football players are.” Anya teased but it was enough to appease Tara, well that and a small punch to the shoulder.
“So you were saying you and Willow do it for like an hour at a time.” Anya got the conversation back on track, the same track her mind seemed to run on. Tara just smiled a knowing smile at her friend.
“It’s not hard Anya, we loose ourselves in each other and by the time you look at the clock, time has just flown by. I pity you if you can’t get that with Xander because it really is special. It’s not just sex, it’s something more.” Anya’s face turned from sadness at the fact that she didn’t share the same thing with Xander to confusion when Tara stated that it wasn’t just sex.
“If it makes you orgasm, and it’s not just you, it’s sex.” Anya stated, trying to clarify exactly what it was to Tara.
“No, it’s something more, it’s more like… making love.” Anya’s face filled with a knowing smile.
“I so knew you were in love with her.” Anya beamed, pointing a knowing finger at the blonde. Tara just smiled back a knowing smile and turned her head to the ground. She was in love all right, totally and utterly.
………..
“So have you told her yet?” Anya asked as her, Cordelia and Tara walked through the park on a sunny Saturday afternoon.
“Told her what?” Cordelia interjected, unsure of where their previous conversation about clothes had turned.
“She’s in love with Willow.” Anya answered as matter of fact.
“Ohhhh that, I thought we all knew that already.” Cordelia replied with a bemused look on her face.
“We knew they were close, not in love, this is so cool, I can’t believe one of my friends are in love.” Anya clapped her hands in glee as Tara and Cordelia stifled giggles at their friend’s overly joyly behaviour.
“What about you and Xander, you two seem pretty much in love?” Tara questioned, which drew a great bout of laughter from the other two girls.
“What you two seem very close.” Tara added as confusion sat in.
“Let me answer this An, Anya and Xander, it’s a thing that lets the two of them blow of some of their adversely high sexual tension.” Cordelia explained the reason behind Anya’s relationship with Willow’s oddball childhood friend.
“Not as high as Willow and Tara’s seemingly.” Anya huffed as Cordelia looked at her friend in confusion. Tara blushed at the statement and decided this conversation needed a change and she decided she may as well get some questions of her own answered.
“So Cordy, Anya seems to think that there is something going on between you and Donnie, would you kindly tell her that there’s nothing going on.” Tara turned to Cordelia hoping she would tell Anya what she was hoping for.
Cordelia turned to Anya and squealed in delight. “Did he say something about me, does he like me, should I talk to him?” Cordelia blurted out in great speed to her friend. Anya'’ face lit up in a knowing smile as Tara'’ jaw dropped at the confirmation of the information that Anya had given her a few day’s earlier.
“Cordy, that’s my little brother you’re talking about.” Tara interjected her shock still clearly evident in her tone.
“Your cute, single and lets not forget popular football star, little brother.” Cordelia replied smugly, if Tara wasn’t convinced before, which she was, she definitely was now.
“I will her no talk about dating my little brother, it’s one of the rules you have to adhere to in the best friend act, no dating ex’s or family members.” Tara stated, trying to convince her friend that dating her brother was off limits.
“Think about it Tar, if we got married, you’d be my sister in law, we’d be sisters.” Cordelia reasoned trying to convince her friend. Tara’s jaw dropped another inch at the brunette’s comments.
“What do you mean get married, do you even know if he likes you yet?” Tara asked, her shock still quite apparent.
“He’s a teenage boy Tar, hormones flowing in every which way and direction. He makes googly eyes with most of the girls most of Cordy.” Anya responded, answering for her friend. Tara huffed, she couldn’t really complain about that, even she noticed the way he looked at every girl in the school as disturbing as it is. She decided another topic change was way overdue and proceeded to steer the conversation away from the disturbing area of how her brother looked at other girls.
Tara spotted the cutest shirt with a picture of a puppy on the front, “Willow would love this.” She said as she picked it up and smiled at it.
“Argh, what the hell are you doing with that poor excuse for a piece of cotton sitting in your hand?” Cordelia asked as a look of total disbelief at the shirt Tara had pulled of the rack.
“What she has heaps of clothes like this, I’m sure she’d love it.” Tara reasoned as she continued to study the piece of clothing.
“Tar, Willow’s fashion sense is not exactly top of the pecking order if you catch my drift. We were actually gonna ask you to try and convince her to come shopping with us, we could get her a whole new wardrobe.” Cordelia stated, Anya nodding her agreement beside her.
“Hey, I don’t love her because of her clothes, though her quirky fashion sense is just one of the many things I do love about her.” Tara retorted a bit defensively.
“Quirky is the understatement of the century.” Cordelia said under her breath as Tara shot her a knowing glance. If looks could kill.
…………..
“Okay sweetie were probably gonna be out all night, no boys you two.” Sheila joked as Willow and Tara sat on the couch watching t.v. Snuggled in each other’s arms.
“We were gonna invite the football side over and let them have our way with us, but if you say just the two of us, I’m sure we’ll manage.” Willow sighed a mock sigh of disappointment.
“Bye you two.” Ira said between laughs as they walked through the front door, closing it behind them.
“Mmmm, Alone at last.” Willow stated as she leant down and planted a quick kiss on Tara’s lips.
“First time all week a believe, been kinda avoidy since getting back from the ranch.” Tara answered, not sure if she was stating her own feelings or asking about Willow’s.
“Lots to think about, about us and stuff.” Willow answered, taking Tara’s comments as a question.
“You too huh, good stuff I hope.” Tara smiled back at her girlfriend.
“Definitely not bad stuff.” Willow reassured her lover.
“That’s good, I’m not a good taker of bad news.” Tara smiled meekly up at Willow.
“Either am I.” Willow replied.
“So what were you thinking about then?” Tara asked trying to break the uncomfortable silence that was beginning to take place.
“We’ve known each other what, four months?” The redhead queried to the blonde.
“Pretty much answered your own question there sweetie.” Tara smiled up at Willow.
“It’s not that long is it really?” Willow stated more than asked.
“I guess it’s not.” Tara answered her voice face now a little concerned.
“It’s funny though, it feels like I’ve known you forever, it’s like I can’t remember a moment without thinking of you.” Willow smiled down to her now smiling lover.
“I feel the same way.” Tara replied then urged Willow to continue as she squeezed a bit tighter in their embrace.
“I know this may seem a bit sudden but I think…” Willow was cut of by Xander and Buffy walking unannounced into the living room, talking about the finer points of the video game they had been playing all afternoon.
“Are you kidding me I totally whipped your ass.” Buffy stated.
“We were supposed to be on the same team.” Xander replied in a pleading tone.
“Ohhhh.” Buffy said as if just realising what Xander had been trying to tell her. “Still doesn’t mean I didn’t kick your ass.” Xander sighed in frustration, giving up.
“Hey ladies.” He said to the two girls sitting on the couch cuddled up staring at him and Buffy.
“When exactly were you two invited to join us on this intimate evening for the two of us?” Willow asked a bit angrily. Just then Anya and Cordelia walked in, once again discussing the possibilities of dating Donnie as they plopped themselves down on the couch next to Willow and Tara.
Anya looked over to Willow and Tara and noted that they were in the pyjamas. A confused look settled over her face before it lit up in a happy smile. “Is this supposed to be a slumber party?” She blurted out happily.
“It was for me and Tara before the lot of you showed up.” Willow answered in her best pissed off voice.
“So should we go and get some pyjama’s?” Cordelia asked warily. Willow threw up her hands, breaking her embrace with Tara as she sighed in frustration. An intimate evening with Tara now seemed ruined.
“Ohhh Goody, slumber party.” Buffy squealed as Xander’s face also lit up in glee.
Not fifteen minutes later all six of them sat in the lounge room discussing various incidents throughout the week. Tara had decided that if everyone was gonna be there she should fix some snacks much to the displeasure of Willow. Now in the circle Tara rubbed Willow’s knuckles with her thumb, their holding hands the only part of their embrace left as Tara tried to calm a seething Willow. Tara knew what Willow was like without her Tara kisses and they had been few and far between during the week they had spent with their friends, thinking things over. To ease the pain a little she reached over and pecked Willow on the cheek as a smile started to surface on Willow’s face; she couldn’t frown no matter how bad things were when Tara’s lips touched her skin.
Willow noticed that Anya and Xander were getting rather friendly before shouting out “Hey!” Anya and Xander broke away to look in Willow’s direction. “If I don’t get my Tara smoochies you two don’t get to do, whatever it is that you two do.” She pointed out stubbornly. Much to their displeasure, Xander and Anya moved away from each other, a satisfied smile spread across Willow’s face. “That’ll teach them to interrupt me and Tara.” She thought smugly to herself.
Willow got up and walked into the kitchen and poured herself a glass of water. She felt the comforting feel of Tara’s arms entwine around her waist.
“How you coping sweetie?” Tara whispered into her girlfriend’s ear.
“I’m not, we spent all week with them and now I want to be with just you, I’m not being selfish am I?” Willow asked in resignation.
“If you are, we are a couple of very selfish people.” Tara answered, Willow turned her head to face Tara. They both shared a loving smile at each other. Willow leaned back and layed a kiss on Tara’s lips that slowly became more passionate.
“Hey if Xander and I can’t then you two can’t either.” Anya interrupted from the doorway. Tara broke the kiss and Willow let out yet another disappointed sigh. “I’m gonna have to start putting up locks.” She mumbled out loud enough for only the blonde to hear what she said.
“What like I did?” Tara replied, a giggle escaping after she finished speaking. Willow just smiled up at her, she was amazed at how no matter how she was feeling the blonde could always make her smile. What amazed her just as much was that Tara was so calm and collected when Willow knew she was as frustrated as she was.
“Come on sweetie, Anya will be back to check on us in a sec.”
“I don’t care, she’s gonna have to drag me back.” Willow replied as she took the blonde’s lips with her own. Just as things started to heat up again Anya walked back into the kitchen and took hold of one of Tara’s hand’s and dragged her back to the living room. Tara’s reluctance to let go of Willow with her other hand meant the redhead was dragged behind as well.
When they got back into the lounge room Anya had sat Tara in the corner of the couch and positioned herself next to her, forcing Willow to sit on the other side of her. If Willow wasn’t royally pissed before, she was now. Anya crossed the line and Willow had, had just about all she could take. Tara saw the look on her lover’s face and concern spread across her face as she knew Willow was bout to blow.
“What the hell do you think you are doing, you invade my home, destroy any chance I had of having a romantic evening and now you put yourself in between me and my girlfriend.” Willow near shouted, her nostrils flaring as the anger in her boiled over the top.
“You won’t let Xander and I be all kissy faced so fairs fair I say.” Anya replied meekly, cowering at the fearsomeness that was a frustrated Willow.
“That’s no reason to keep me apart from the woman I love.” Willow angrily stated towards Anya.
The room fell in silence as Willow realised just what she had said. She looked meekly up at Tara who was sitting in her position in shock.
“L-l-love?” Tara queried, looking back at Willow, “You love me.”
Willow got up and moved in front of Tara, kneeling on both knees so that her face was level with the blonde’s.
“I do, I mean I’m still falling because every time I’m with you I feel closer to you and I hate being apart, like tonight has clearly shown. I fall more in love with you every time I see you. I didn’t ask to feel the way I do about you but I do and I’m not upset about it.” Willow took Tara’s hands in her own and pulled her into the middle of the room, their eyes never breaking apart.
“Wow, I mean wow. I think about you all the time Will and it drives me crazy when for some reason or another we can’t be together. I’ve never felt as safe or as happy as I do than when I’m in your arms. I am so in love with you it’s not funny.” Tara smiled at Willow as a beaming smile also ran riot across the redhead’s face. They just stood there a few moments staring bright eyed at each other.
“If we just said our first I love you’s, why aren’t you kissing me yet? Tara asked slyly as Willow quickly embraced the blonde’s lips in her own. After a few moments they pulled back and smiled once again to each other as they embraced each other in a hug.
Buffy seeing her chance rushed over and wrapped her arms around the two girls. “I’m so happy for you guys.” She said, tears of happiness still running down her face from watching the declaration of love from two of her close friends. Anya and Cordelia were not one’s to be left out and after all Tara was their friend first. They rushed over and made one good old-fashioned group hug. Tears also swelling in their eyes, as Xander moved in throwing his arms around the group as well. Anya playfully punched him on the arm, “Why can’t you ever be that romantic?” She asked him, too happy for her friends to put any sort of venom into it, even that of the mock type.
They all continued to hug as Willow and Tara snuck a few pecks in when the could move their heads enough. Anya didn’t object this time when it was decided that Willow and Tara would be sleeping in Willow’s room while the others would crash in the lounge. Well she did object, just not enough for anyone to care.
TBC…
Okay i got it in early so cool. Next one should be Thursday as i wont be able to post on Friday. So till then there is more Joss hating to do and i think i'll just go and watch my entire season 4 dvd collection, remember the happy days
Cheers
Nath
If life was meant to be a bed of daisy's we'd have chicken crap thown on us all the time.