So here is the final chapter as promised, apologies for the delay but it has been a pretty hectic week and also I wanted to try and get this right so as not to let down those of you who have followed this story. I owe a few of you responses to the wonderful feedback you have given me and now that the story is complete I promise I will get to that, I would post more tonight but as it is 3am here you must forgive me but I am going to bed once this is posted.
Disclaimer The characters of Willow and Tara and the show Buffy the Vampire Slayer are the property of Joss Whedon, no copyright infringement is intended.
Feedback Yes please.
Background This takes place right after the episode Restless.
Rating No more than PG13, sorry smut fans.
Between The Lines
Chapter Fourteen – Always and Forever
Willow giggled as the soft sounds of Xander snoring in Buffy’s living room filtered through to the kitchen, so much for the manly chat he was supposed to be having with Giles about Apocalypse Now. The hot chocolate provided by Joyce had been just the thing after the unpleasant dreams of the first Slayer and it seemed that the boys were now catching up on some more restful sleep. The invitation to join in their debate on the merits or otherwise of the Coppola masterpiece had been declined as Willow was happier sitting at the kitchen table with her drink, enjoying the peace and quiet that allowed her to have a good mental tidy after the events of a very strange day. Buffy had abandoned them early on to go and take a shower and Joyce had gone back to bed so Willow was very much left alone. Not alone though she corrected herself, feeling the now almost ever present smile spreading across her face, now she had Tara she was never truly alone, even when they were apart.
Gazing out of the window there was no sign yet of approaching dawn so officially it was too early to be awake, the deep down tiredness Willow felt confirmed that and yet the idea of crashing in the room with Xander and Giles held little appeal. Slipping her hand into her pocket she fingered the key Tara had given her to her dorm room and realised she knew exactly where she wanted to be, she just needed to get her bag from the living room without disturbing the sleepers. Pushing her chair back quietly and wincing at the slight scraping sound it made on the tile, Willow stood and tiptoed from the kitchen to collect her things. A sneaky moment later and with her bag in hand she backed slowly out of the room, trying not to be too grossed out by the sight of the drooling Xander as he hugged Buffy’s cushions. Mission complete she slipped on her jacket and walked back through to the kitchen to turn off the light, ready to make her escape.
The sound of footsteps in the upstairs hallway reminded her that Buffy was still awake even if nobody else was and presumably out of the shower now. Would Buffy still feel too wired for sleep as she had been earlier or would she just head for her room? Her question was answered all too swiftly as after a brief pause, the footsteps continued along the hallway and onto the stairs, Buffy was headed straight for her and here she was all set to go, she bravely stood still like a rabbit caught in the headlights as the footsteps drew nearer.
“Hey did everybody go to bed already?” Buffy asked as she entered the kitchen, not considering that if they had then there would be nobody to answer her question. She stopped just inside the doorway as she took in the sight of Willow, jacket on and bag in hand, wearing her ‘uh oh busted’ expression. “Going somewhere Will?”
“Oh, err hi Buffy,” Willow flustered, “I was just..”
“Bailing out on me?” Buffy finished the sentence for her.
“No, not bailing, I mean that’s such a judgemental word,” Willow was on the ropes and she knew it, “you don’t want to be judgey now do you Buff?”
“Since when is stating a fact judgemental Will? I go take a shower and I come back to find you sneaking out of the house without even saying goodbye.” Buffy’s eyes glittered dangerously making it clear to Willow that she was on dangerous ground.
“Well it’s not like that,” Willow protested, “Xander and Giles both crashed out from the hot chocolaty goodness and I figured maybe you were not coming back and I..”
“Wanted to go and see Tara?” Buffy asked sternly and then unable to keep up the act any longer she started to laugh.
“What’s so funny?” Willow was momentarily taken aback by Buffy’s sudden change of mood until the realisation dawned that she had been had, “Buffy!”
“I am sorry Will but you looked so guilty,” Buffy explained between guffaws, “I just had to do it, I think you can stand to be teased a little if you are the only one who won’t be sleeping alone tonight.”
“Not the only one,” Willow corrected as she joined in the laughter, “Xander and Giles are pretty snugly in there.”
“Don’t even go there,” Buffy shuddered, “I still have nightmares about Giles and my mom, I don’t need more disturbing images thank you.”
“So you don’t mind?” Willow asked once the laughter had subsided, “about me going I mean, cos I can stay if you want me to.”
“No way Will, I am just going to crash now anyway.” Buffy watched Willow’s face light up with a smile and asked the question even though she already knew the answer, “You love her don’t you?”
“I do,” Willow was positively beaming at the thought of Tara, “I mean, I am not even sure love is a strong enough word, I just feel..”
“I get it Will,” Buffy’s own smile was almost as wide, delighted to see her closest friend so happy, “I mean, not so much the girl on girl thing, but I am working on it. I get the love thing though, I’ve been there.”
“You really do?”
“I do,” Buffy nodded, still smiling, “and you don’t even have to tell me, I can see it in your eyes every time you say her name.”
“Is it that obvious?” Willow asked with a smile halfway between happiness and embarrassment.
“Will, you always did wear your heart on your sleeve, plus, best friend standing here, you think you can fool me?”
“Fool those razor sharp instincts, no never,” Willow laughed and then became serious just for a moment, “I love you Buffy,” then considering how that sounded she added quickly, “in a totally best friend kind of way, not in a like I love Tara kind of way.”
“Never crossed my mind Willow,” Buffy giggled at Willow’s spaz attack, “I am not going to get all weird on you now, we are still friends like we always were.”
“Best friends,” Willow nodded, “forever.” She meant it too as she felt her eyes mist a little with the emotion of this re-connection with the girl she loved better than any sister.
“Forever,” Buffy echoed, “now I need you to do me a favour.”
“Anything Buff, what do you need?” Willow really wanted to get going but after the moment they had just shared she could hardly bail now.
“I want you, as my best friend in the whole world,” Buffy asked with mock solemnity, “to quit yammering in my kitchen and go see your honey.”
“Oh ok,” Willow felt a flood of relief as she realised she was being teased and opted to play along, “but I am only doing this for you, best friend.”
“Get going Rosenberg, before I change my mind,” Buffy mock threatened and then decisively made for the front door.
Willow bounced along behind Buffy and as she paused on the doorstep she impulsively threw her arms around the Slayer and pulled her into a fierce hug, “you are the best Buffy, thanks.”
“Aw, don’t get all sappy on me now Will,” Buffy joked as she struggled to conceal her own emotions, “I have Xander for that.”
“Sorry Buff,” Willow released her hold and took a step out onto the path, “so see you tomorrow maybe?”
“Absolutely,” Buffy affirmed and then an idea hit her, “hey, want to Bronze it tomorrow tonight? We can celebrate stomping Adam and you can bring your girlfriend.”
“Sounds great,” Willow agreed enthusiastically, “I am sure Tara would love to come.”
“Good,” Buffy switched back to teasing mode, “now she is dating my best friend I need to check her over, make sure she is good enough for my Willow.”
“Don’t you dare,” Willow protested and then realised she was being teased again, “ok you are impossible,” laughing she backed down the path, “night Buffy.”
“Night Will, do try and get some sleep tonight.” Buffy winked at her blushing friend as she retreated into the night and then closed the door softly behind her.
Willow watched Buffy close the door and then abandoning all sense of decorum she turned and broke into a run, desperate now to get to Tara as soon as possible. The night air was sharp in her lungs and the sky looked more glorious than ever as she stretched her legs and felt the exhilaration run through her. The desire to run was as much a symptom of her happiness as it was her desire to reach her destination, the euphoria she felt bubbling up inside her demanded that she run and had it not been so quiet she probably would have whooped and hollered too. The conversation with Buffy had erased so many of her concerns and she felt a little thrill at the idea of a simple night out with the gang at the Bronze with Tara along as her official date. There were still a few bridges to cross, her parents for one, but she knew that the people who mattered most would be there for her when all was said and done.
Reaching Tara’s building she hurtled up stairs and along hallways until she arrived breathless outside of the door to her happiness. Fumbling the key into the lock, she eased open the door and slipped silently into the room, her eyes already used to the dark she made out Tara’s sleeping figure in the bed and crossed over to take a better look. Willow undressed as quietly as she could as she studied the beautiful vision before her, unable to quite believe her luck that she was here and Tara loved her. With a sigh of sheer bliss she slid between the covers and wrapped her arms around Tara, spooning her body against her love and luxuriating in the warmth and comfort that contact brought. Willow wondered whether it would be ok to wake Tara for a little late night fun and she was still considering that idea when sleep finally claimed her.
……………………………………………………………………………..
Tara was having a wonderful dream, Willow had decided not to stay at Buffy’s after all and had appeared in her room in the middle of the night and joined her in the bed. It wasn’t a naughty dream, just a dream of being held and sharing closeness, still it was a dream that Tara had no wish to leave before she absolutely had too and so she fought with all her strength against that part of her mind that told her it was morning and time to wake up. Try as she might to hold onto sleep she was gradually becoming aware of the world around her, the sunlight that fell across face, the soft murmur of voices from the early risers outside her window and the soft warm breath on the back of her neck.
Tara’s eyes shot open as she finally processed that last piece of information, breath on her neck and what else was that she could feel, a warm body pressed tight against her back and strong arms wrapped around her. Her lips burst into a brilliant smile as wide as her big blue eyes as she realised she had not been dreaming at all, Willow had returned to her in the night but in her sleep addled state she had thought she was dreaming. Tara felt a flicker of annoyance with herself for not waking up properly when Willow returned but then again if she had then she would have not had such a lovely surprise this morning and as surprises went, this was one of the best she could have wished for.
Slipping free from the arms that held her, Tara turned to face the other way and came face to face with a mop of tousled red hair and the adorable face of her sweetheart, eyes just beginning to peep open to greet the day. “Hey sweetie,” Tara smiled at the sleep scrunched face, “aren’t you just the s-sneakiest.”
“Do I hear you complaining,” Willow protested and then covered her mouth to stifle a tiny yawn before continuing, “I couldn’t stay away, I think you might have bewitched me Miss Maclay.”
“You think I n-needed magic to capture you?” Tara asked in a mock hurt voice although her smile gave away the fact that she was teasing.
“Oh no, no way,” Willow tried to emphasise her words with a shake of the head but realising she would have to lift her head from the pillow to achieve the desired effect she gave in to her more lazy impulses, “a hot mama yama like you could get any girl she wanted, no magic.”
“Any girl?” Tara raised her eyebrows questioning that statement.
“Oh sure, I mean who wouldn’t want you,” Willow enthused, “not that you can have any girl though,” this time Willow did relinquish the pillow long enough to shake her head, “no other girls at all, I am not big with the sharing.”
“I am glad to hear it,” Tara giggled at Willow’s earnest expression, “but you c-can relax, I have all the girl I want.”
“Darn tootin.”
Tara’s giggles turned to full blown laughter as she tried and failed to take Willow seriously, “So how come you d-didn’t stay at Buffy’s?”
“Long story,” Willow began and then flashed Tara her most winning smile before continuing, “kind of a take me out for waffles and coffee and I will tell all story.”
“Ok deal,” Tara returned Willow’s smile with interest, breakfast for two sounded perfect right about now. “So what plans d-do you have for today?”
“Tara plans, of the all day variety.”
“My favourite,” Tara enthused, feeling a glow of happiness at the thought of Willow all day, “anything specific?”
“Oh well, after breakfast I do need to swing by Giles place cos I left my laptop there again, you know with all the sneaking off to fight Adam excitement, and then I was thinking, maybe the mall?” Willow definitely wanted to hit the mall, she had plans and the mall was essential.
“Count me in, do you n-need anything particular at the mall?”
“Could do,” Willow teased, “come with me and find out.”
“Ok,” Tara grinned, trying not to get too carried away at Willow’s unintentional double entendre.
“Oh, oh,” Willow sat up excitedly in the bed, “I almost forgot, we are going to the Bronze tonight.”
“We are?” Tara wondered why going to the Bronze should get Willow so excited, to hear Willow tell it she had been Bronzing it several times a week for the last few years.
“Uh huh,” Willow nodded, “Buffy’s idea, the whole gang partying at the Bronze, kind of a celebration after beating the big evil.”
“Cool,” Tara smiled, so that’s why Willow was excited, the significance of a night out with the whole gang now that their relationship was out in the open did not escape her. She knew how much Willow wanted her friends to share in her happiness and it seemed that maybe she was going to get her wish.
“I had a good talk with Buffy,” Willow blushed a little from the memory, “she thinks I might be a little bit in love with you.”
“Is she right?” Tara asked teasingly.
“You know she is, it’s just,” Willow’s smile lit up her face again, “I really think she gets it, I was afraid she wouldn’t understand but she really seemed happy for me.”
“Willow that’s wonderful,” Tara could have hugged Buffy if she was there at that moment, “I guess she did just need a little time.”
“I guess,” Willow nodded, “so you don’t mind me planning the day like this?”
“No,” Tara confirmed, slipping a hand inside the back of Willow’s shirt as she spoke, “so long as I am in the p-plans I don’t care what we do.”
“Ooh, that could be interesting, we can do anything?” Willow could feel her brain hum into life as she considered all the possibilities that statement opened up, she could also feel Tara’s fingers tracing a slow circle on the small of her back and that raised interesting possibilities too.
“Anything.” Tara confirmed, smiling seductively.
“I need to give this some serious thought,” Willow grinned, “but you still owe me breakfast if you want me to spill about last night.”
“Breakfast can w-wait a while,” Tara purred as she slipped her hand a little lower.
“But, the waffles.” Willow protested weakly.
“Will taste better once you work up an appetite.
Tara’s hand was doing some very interesting things now and Willow could feel her brain fogging, “Tara, what are you doing?”
“Taking control,” Tara smiled, “you don’t mind do you?”
“Oh no,” Willow smiled and whispered into Tara’s ear, “vixen.”
……………………………………………………………………………………
Breakfast had been very late, almost brunch Tara decided as she walked with Willow to Mr Giles apartment, the delay had been more than worth it though as they had both had a chance to show just how much they had missed each other yesterday. Willow’s explanation of the weird shared dream, a side product of the powerful spell the gang had cast, had been interesting but she had been far more interested in the details of Willow’s conversation with Buffy. Knowing how the Slayer felt about their relationship was a weight off her mind and she found that despite her shyness she was excited about the prospect of a night out ‘bronzing it’ as Willow put it. Approaching Giles door she automatically began to let go of Willow’s hand but felt the redhead tighten her grip and refuse to let go.
“We don’t have to do that anymore,” Willow admonished her gently, “out and proud girlfriend standing right here.”
“Sorry,” Tara smiled at Willow’s resolve face, “force of habit.”
“Time to quit then, I like your hand exactly where it is and if Giles has a problem then maybe it’s time we reminded him it’s not the eighteenth century anymore.”
Willow knocked on the door and a moment later it swung open to reveal Buffy’s watcher looking just a little worse for wear.
“Ah Willow, I didn’t expect to see you today.”
“Hello to you too Giles,” Willow stepped forward as he ushered the girls inside, “I just came by for my laptop, again.”
“Hello Mr Giles.” Tara greeted the Englishman.
“Hello Tara, how are you today?” Giles asked with just a hint of embarrassment in his voice.
“Very well, thank you.”
“Good, good,” turning to Willow he continued, “it’s on the table where you left it, I am ashamed to admit I was afraid to touch it.”
Willow grinned at Giles admission of his techno-fear, “no problem Giles, but really these things are a lot harder to break than you think.”
Ever the genial host Giles headed to his small kitchen area, “can I get either of you anything? Tea or maybe something to eat?”
“No thanks Giles,” Willow shut the laptop and slipped it into it’s carrying case, “we had breakfast on the way here.”
“Right, ok then,” Giles walked back to the seating area where the two girls stood and in a move so familiar to Willow, he removed his glasses and began polishing them. “I er, I am glad you came by actually,” he replaced his glasses and smiled at the girls as they waited patiently for him to continue, “both of you that is, there is something I need to say.”
“If it involves hell beasts or an apocalypse it can wait,” Willow teased, “we have shopping planned.”
“No, no,” Giles chuckled at Willow’s outburst, “no apocalypse today, I believe that is next Thursday.” Giles expression became serious once more as he struggled to overcome his obvious discomfort, “I wanted to apologise, to both of you, the way I behaved the other night..”
“Forgotten already,” Willow interrupted, “it was just the gallon of alcohol that was to blame.”
“Even so,” Giles continued, “I learnt something that, well, something that took me by surprise, and I behaved like a prize idiot.”
“It’s ok Mr Giles,” Tara could see how embarrassed he was and despite her own annoyance at the events when she was last here her compassionate nature wanted to make this as easy as possible for him.
“No Tara, it’s not ok,” Giles sighed, “Willow is very important to me,” he smiled at the blush that coloured Willow’s cheeks, “and I hope that you too will become a good friend in time, I would be honoured if that were the case.” Now it was Tara’s turn to blush but still Giles continued, “the choice that you both have made takes enormous courage and you deserve my support and respect, I failed miserably on both counts and so I must ask that you accept my apology.”
“Giles,” Willow’s voice was thick with emotion, “of course we accept or I mean, I do and..”
“Yes,” Tara interrupted, “we do.”
“Good, good,” Giles removed his glasses again, “thank you both,” his embarrassment was evident as he polished furiously at the already spotless glasses.
The trio stood in silence for a few moments more, Tara looking from Willow to Mr Giles and back again before sensing that perhaps the two old friends could use a moment alone, “excuse me,” she murmured and slipped quietly from the room on the pretext of using the bathroom.
Willow watched Tara walk away, not breaking her gaze until the blonde was out of sight, unaware that Giles was studying her at least as closely as she was studying Tara.
“You love her don’t you?” Giles found himself speaking almost without thinking as he recognised the look in Willow’s eyes
“You are the second person to say that to me,” Willow laughed, “and yes I do, I know it might seem strange but it’s real Giles, I can’t explain it but I feel like I was meant to love her.”
“It doesn’t seem strange at all,” Giles gestured for Willow to take a seat as he dropped into a chair himself, “love is a perfectly natural thing.”
“Giles, its ok if you are a little freaked, I didn’t exactly see this coming myself and hello, I speak to me every day.”
“I am not ‘freaked’ as you put it,” Giles winced as he pronounced the word, “I was young myself once and a college student too, I was just taken by surprise but we covered that already.”
“So you are ok with this?” Willow had figured that being so old Giles would be the one who would have the hardest time with her new relationship, she also realised with some surprise that his opinion really mattered, something about his being the nearest thing she had to a parent figure in her life with the lack of concern that her biological parents showed in her.
“If you are happy then of course,” Giles looked a little uncomfortable and cleared his throat before continuing, “my life has been full in many ways, I stand by the choices I have made but I do sometimes regret that I never found time for a family.”
“You are not that old Giles,” Willow interjected.
“That’s not really the point and besides I wasn’t finished,” Giles managed that look of mild annoyance that he so frequently wore when talking to any of the gang, “now where was I? Oh yes, family.” Giles again looked embarrassed as he paused and then seemed to focus on a spot somewhere to the right of Willow’s head, “in my years in Sunnydale you have all come to me a great deal to me, I have watched you grow up and I do feel responsible for you all and I care a great deal about you,” Giles allowed himself a smile, “even Xander.”
“Well, we love you too Giles, you know that right?” Willow wondered where Giles was going with all of this; it was certainly out of character for the normally reserved former librarian.
“I want all of you to find happiness and fulfilment in your lives, nothing could bring me greater pleasure,” Giles turned his gaze back to Willow and continued, “you say that you love Tara and I want you to know how happy I am for you.”
“You really mean that?” Willow asked, “I mean, I am so happy with Tara and you really do understand?”
“I do,” Giles paused again, “Willow, what I am trying to say is that I am proud of you, I could not be prouder if you were my own daughter,” Giles removed his glasses and wiped his hand across his eyes, “and Tara is a lucky young woman indeed if you truly do love her.”
Willow felt a surge of affection for this normally reserved man, she had desperately wanted Giles to understand but she had never dreamed he would lower his defences in this way. Already she could see that he was feeling uncomfortable and yet she could not find the words to express how she felt, standing she walked to where he sat and placed a hand on his shoulder, finally breaking the silence she simply said “thank you” and then leaning down she briefly hugged him.
Tara had started to walk back into the room only to stop just out of sight when she had heard Giles tell Willow how happy he was for her. Peeking around the corner she had seen the exchange that followed and the brief hug Willow had given Giles that said more than a thousand words could. Tara’s eyes shone with tears of happiness, she had known how much Willow loved and respected her old teacher and how much this would mean to her. Tara had suspected Giles had hidden depths beneath the reserved image he projected to the outside world but even she was surprised at the strength of his affection and care for Willow, the bond between Giles and the young woman was clearly more familial than merely friendship and something special had just taken place.
The silence continued as both Giles and Willow found themselves alternately too embarrassed and too emotional to speak and so it was with some relief that they looked up at the sound of Tara’s return.
“Mr Giles,” Tara sensed that a little humour was needed to relieve the emotionally charged atmosphere, “you seem to have m-made Willow speechless, could you teach me how to do that?”
“Tara!” Willow protested in outrage, “it’s not like I talk all the time or at least, I do talk all the time but there is always so much to say and hey, since when did you not like listening to me?”
“I l-love listening to you,” Tara smiled at Willow’s pouty face, “I just couldn’t resist teasing you, you look so cute when you are offended.”
“Yes quite,” Giles interrupted with a cough.
Tara felt herself flush with embaressment, had she just called Willow cute in front of Mr Giles? “S-sorry Mr Giles, I didn’t mean..”
“No need to apologise,” Giles quickly interrupted, “and please don’t feel you have to watch what you say in my presence. I was just thinking that perhaps the two of you have better things to be doing today than visiting an out of work librarian, not that it isn’t appreciated, but I do believe Willow mentioned shopping.”
“Yes, shopping,” Willow exclaimed, seizing the opportunity to change the subject and enthused again as she recalled she had a very good reason for visiting the mall today.
“Well, don’t let me keep you,” Giles smiled and moved to open the door, “I know how much the storekeepers of Sunnydale look forward to your visit.”
“Goodbye Mr Giles,” Tara called out shyly as she ducked through the open door.
“Goodbye Tara,” Giles answered and then added softly so that only Tara would hear, “thank you, I have never seen Willow so happy.”
Tara stopped in her tracks as Willow motored past her but before she could even think of a reply Mr Giles had closed the door behind them.
“Tara, are you ok?” Willow asked with concern as she realised Tara was not following her.
“Yes,” Tara smiled and walked up to Willow, taking her hand and falling into step, “I feel pretty w-wonderful actually.”
……………………………………………………….
Tara took another sip from her tea and looked across the table to where Willow was bouncing in her seat, Mocha in one hand and wallet in the other. The trip around the mall had been fun and so as a reward she was allowing Willow one Mocha before they headed back to the dorms to get ready for their night out. One Mocha and then she was cutting her off, Willow was already dangerously hyperactive and the effects of too much caffeine did not bear thinking about, clearly Willow was slightly nervous about tonight and her system could do without any more artificial stimulants. Tara looked a little more closely and considered Willow’s state of mind, her eyes were flicking from side to side and she seemed to be anxious about something, anxious but not in a bad way she concluded.
“Bathroom,” Willow exclaimed, “I mean, I have to go to the..”
“Bathroom?”
“Yep, sorry, I won’t be long,” Willow flashed her a smile and slipped off her seat before practically running around the corner like a rocket shot from a bottle.
Tara smiled to herself as she watched Willow go, despite the anxiety she had sensed she was attuned enough to Willow’s moods to know that there was nothing to worry about. The feelings she had sensed were happy ones and she concluded that if it was anything important Willow would tell her in her own time. Tara set her tea back down on the table and then reached down to pick up one of the shopping bags from where it had toppled when Willow disturbed it in her haste to get up. The collection of bags was impressive, all of them Willow’s as Tara had little money to burn and wanted to keep what she had for tonight so that she would not have to rely on the charity of others if she wanted a drink. The bags contained several new shirts, two skirts, several books and various sundry items of make-up and bits and pieces that Willow had accumulated as she shopped with an enthusiasm and stamina that had left Tara breathless. There was also a pale blue shirt with a picture of a kitty on it which Willow had insisted on buying for Tara, explaining that it was a Miss Kitty shirt and Tara had to have it, Tara had relented even though she was unused to being bought gifts by anyone. Tara had tried to explain her discomfort, heightened as it was by the fact that her own limited budget meant she would not be able to buy anything in return, but Willow had merely assumed her resolve face and explained in a voice that brooked no argument that she was just going to have to get used to being bought gifts because she was worth it. Tara had blushed furiously at that point and so too had Willow but thinking about it now Tara felt her heart skip a beat at the obvious love in Willow’s eyes as they had spoken.
Tara had to admit she was almost as excited as Willow by the prospect of an evening at the Bronze, now that her doubts about the reaction of Willow’s friends to their relationship had been eased she was eager to share in what promised to be a special night for Willow. The plan was to head back to the dorms once they were done here and Willow had insisted that they separate briefly so that she could return to her own room to change for the evening, the implication was that she was planning on wearing something special and Tara was intrigued to see what Willow had in mind. The fact was Willow could have worn a garbage sack and Tara would still think she was beautiful but she could certainly appreciate the idea of Willow picking out an outfit just to please her. Glancing at her watch Tara calculated that they would need to be going soon if they wanted to have time to prepare without rushing, what could be taking Willow so long in the restroom?
Willow was not in the restroom, she was being sneaky and loving every second of it even as her heart pounded with the fear that Tara might not wait and come looking for her before she could accomplish her secret mission. The jewellery store was situated just a little way around the corner from the coffee bar and that was why Willow had chosen to stop there, knowing she could slip away under the pretence of using the bathroom and pick up the item she needed before Tara could grow too suspicious. On their first trip to the mall, back when they were pretending to just be friends, she had noticed in the window display of the jewellers a matched pair of Claddagh rings and she had immediately thought they would be perfect for the two of them if they ever did reach the point where they were together.
They were certainly together now and Willow just knew that the moment was right for this gesture, some token to confirm their love and commitment both to each other and to the outside world. Buffy had explained the symbolism of the Claddagh ring back when Angel had presented her with one for her seventeenth birthday and Willow had thought it was the most romantic thing she had ever heard, certainly in a world where there was no legal way to recognise her relationship with Tara it seemed especially perfect, as if the rings had been made for them. Willow hopped from one foot to the other, panicking that this was taking too long as the elderly jeweller slowly processed her transaction.
“Do you understand the symbolism of the rings?” The jeweller paused in the act of placing the rings in the gift box and looked enquiringly at Willow.
“Yes, yes,” Willow hopped even more anxiously, “a friend explained it to me a long time ago.”
“The ring worn on the right hand, crown turned inward tells your heart is yet unoccupied, worn with the crown turned outwards reveals love is being considered.” The old man paused, oblivious to the fact that Willow was not listening but holding out her hand for her purchase, desperate for him to hurry up so she get back to Tara without being discovered. “Worn on the left hand the crown turned outward shows all, your heart is truly spoken for.”
“I know,” Willow muttered as she checked her watch and then finally he was done and handing the gift box to her. Distractedly she murmured her thanks and then slipped the box into her jacket pocket before sprinting out of the store and back to the coffee bar and the table where Tara waited patiently.
“Willow,” Tara looked up in amusement as the redhead came to a screeching halt at their table, “why are you so out of b-breath?”
“I’m not,” Willow started to protest but hearing her own ragged breathing couldn’t keep up the act, “well I am but it’s not important,” picking up her Mocha she took a quick swallow and realised there was no more left. “Tara?” She looked across at her love, more in hope than expectation, but saw the steely gaze of take charge Tara looking back at her.
“No Willow, we agreed only one,” Tara laughed and her expression softened, “you know I hate to d-deny you anything, you have to stop giving me the p-puppy dog eyes, it’s not fair.”
“Alls fair in love and Mocha.” Willow retorted, wincing at her own bad joke. “So do you want to head out? We ought to be thinking about getting ready if we don’t want to be late.”
“Sure,” Tara stood as she spoke and picked up her share of Willow’s shopping bags, “you need anything else before we go?” Tara looked at the bags in both her hands and Willow’s and then added, “I guess not.”
“All shopped out,” Willow agreed, “lets just head home before my arms fall off,” she winced theatrically as she lifted her bags.
The girls walked along in silence as they headed for the most convenient exit, Tara a half pace behind Willow as she pondered what to wear for tonight. Willow was clearly making some special effort so should she do the same? On the one hand she felt obligated to match Willow but on the other she realised she had little variety in her wardrobe and this was only the Bronze after all. Wear what you are comfortable in she told herself, being around the gang would be stressful enough without making herself more uncomfortable by dressing out of character. Breaking from her reverie she noticed Willow’s steps falter momentarily and as she glanced up she caught Willow looking quickly at a window display before guiltily looking away, flashing a quick glance at Tara to see if she had been caught in the act Willow turned crimson with embaressment.
“Did you see something you like? Tara asked as she looked at the store and then felt her own blush as she realised what she was looking at.
“I um, see something, no I wasn’t,” Willow babbled incoherently as she Saw Tara’s eyes widen at the display in the Victoria’s Secret store.
“Willow,” Tara spoke as gently as she could, “it’s ok if you were looking, I mean if you like that stuff.”
“I don’t,” Willow protested a bit too fiercely, “I mean I didn’t but..”
“You changed your mind?” Tara asked, half amused and half embarrassed but curious to know the truth. “I mean, when we c-came here before you were looking in this store,” Tara recalled their previous trip to the mall and a similar guilty reaction from Willow.
“You saw?” Willow asked guiltily.
“I did,” Tara nodded.
“It’s not for me,” Willow spoke in a rush, “I mean how silly would I look and hey, no curves,” Willow was speaking too fast for Tara to interrupt, “but when we came before, I was just looking and I thought,” Willow’s blush deepened, “I thought about how you would look and now you caught me and you probably think I am some kind of weirdo.”
Tara couldn’t help laughing at Willow’s outburst but she realised too that she needed to handle this right, “Willow it’s ok to look.”
“It is?”
“D-Do you think I would mind?” Tara wanted to know.
“Well I thought, maybe,” Willow looked at Tara trying to gauge her mood, “I mean, you might be offended.”
“Offended because you have fantasies?” Tara took Willow’s hand in hers and spoke quietly to avoid being overheard by their fellow shoppers, “Willow, if you want to see me wearing something like that maybe you should just ask.”
“You mean?”
“I mean,” Tara gave Willow a seductive smile, “actually it’s k-kind of flattering.”
“Oh wow,” Willow’s eyes grew wide, “do we have to go out tonight?”
“We do,” Tara slipped her hand into Willow’s and tugged her in the direction of the exit, “but you are c-coming home with me after right?”
“Oh yes.”
……………………………………………………………………
Tara sat in the midst of the Scooby gang and listened to the flow of conversation as Willow’s friends teased and bantered with one another, straining to make themselves heard over the steady pulse of the music echoing through the Bronze. Tara felt slightly dazed to be sitting here, with Willow’s hand in hers, joining in the ritual teasing and partying which seemed to be the Scooby way of blowing off steam after averting the apocalypse. Tara had been feeling dazed from the moment Willow had picked her up from her dorm room, they had separated briefly to head to their separate rooms to change for the evening and Willow had arrived wearing a pair of green leather pants that made Tara feel dizzy in a very pleasurable way. Willow had clearly remembered Tara’s reaction when they had discussed leather outfits before and she took great delight in parading around Tara’s room before they left, Tara had found herself echoing Willow’s earlier sentiments about whether they really did need to go out tonight but now she was very glad that they had come.
“Who needs another drink,” Xander asked as he stood up from the table and was greeted by a chorus of me, me from the assembled ladies.
“What’s got you so generous Xander,” Willow asked, “this is the third time you have offered already.”
“Least I can do,” Xander chuckled, “my reputation with the regulars here is sky high thanks to you, I mean here I am, the only guy sitting at a table with four beauties, I am a legend at the bar.”
“So they think we are your harem?” Willow arched her eyebrows dangerously, “you feel like slaying Buffy?”
“Nah,” Buffy chuckled, “if the guys in here can’t tell we are way out of Xander’s league then that’s their problem.”
“Ok, way to hurt my pride Buff,” Xander huffed, “keep it up and I am going to scratch you off my dance card.”
“Oh no,” Buffy exclaimed in mock horror, “you know how much I love the graceful way you step on my toes. Whatever will I do?”
“I’ll dance with you,” Anya offered with a laugh, “might be fun to dance with someone who actually has rhythm.”
“Ok, now I am starting to think being outnumbered is not a good thing,” Xander complained, “is this everybody pick on Xander night?”
“You aren’t outnumbered really,” Willow spoke with mock solemnity, “in fact we all think you are totally one of the girls.”
“Ok, ok, I am going to the bar,” Xander held up his hands in mock surrender, “my ego can’t take anymore of this, Anya, come be my drink carrying buddy?”
Tara watched as Anya hopped off her stool and followed Xander over to the bar, she couldn’t help liking the young man, he seemed comfortable with his friendship with both Willow and Buffy and unlike so many men, Riley for one, he didn’t appear to resent the fact that the two girls were more powerful than he was. Glancing back to the girl beside her she caught Willow staring at her and dropped her eyes in shyness, a blush rising as she realised Buffy was sitting right there watching the glances they exchanged.
“Am I making you uncomfortable?”
Tara looked up in surprise as Buffy spoke, had the Slayer realised she was feeling a little embarrassed? “I um..”
“Don’t be,” Buffy grinned, “I think you two look great together.”
“Thanks Buff,” Willow smiled at her friend, “I think she looks great too.”
Tara didn’t know how to respond to that comment and so she was relieved when a moment later a slow song came on and Willow tugged at her hand, “will you dance with me?”
“Sure,” Tara slipped off the stool and gave Buffy a nervous smile as she followed Willow onto the dance floor, they had not danced to a slow song together in public before and she wondered what kind of reaction they might provoke. Willow turned to face her as they reached the dance floor and as Tara felt Willow’s arms wrap around her she realised that actually she didn’t care what anyone else thought, she just wanted to enjoy this moment of closeness like any young woman in love.
“Wow, they look good together.”
Buffy looked up to see Xander staring at the two girls on the dance floor as he set the drinks on the table. “Yes they do,” she nodded her assent, “I mean, look at the way they look at one another, it’s like nobody else is here.”
“I know what you mean,” Xander commented as he took his seat, “Willow has hardly taken her eyes off Tara all night, I think it might be love.”
“Of course it is,” Anya interjected as she sat alongside him, “even you ought to be able to see that, they are made for each other.”
“You really think so?”
“Yes,” chorused Anya and Buffy together, “think about it Xander,” Buffy continued, “you know Willow better than any of us, can’t you see how right this is? I think this is the happiest I have ever seen her.”
“You’re right,” Xander conceded, “that is one happy little Willow out there, I guess I just can’t believe I never knew this about her.”
“I don’t think Willow knew until she met Tara,” Buffy reflected, “I think she just needed to meet the right girl.”
“I like her,” Anya spoke up again, “I don’t see why Xander is acting all surprised, the magazines under his bed are full of pictures of girls together.”
“You looked under my bed,” Xander asked aghast, “I mean, what magazines? Somebody else must have left them there.”
“You are not going to have a problem with this are you Xander?” Buffy asked, sparing Xander any further embaressment about his choice of reading material, “I mean, this is a good thing that is happening for Willow, you do get that right?”
“I get that,” Xander smiled, “sure I wigged at first but then I don’t think I was the only one. I love Willow, she is my best friend and if Tara makes her happy then that is more than good enough for me.”
“Have you told her?” Buffy pressed the point.
“Well, not in so many words,” Xander shrugged, “she knows I think Tara is great, we spoke about it when we went bowling.”
“But you didn’t know they were dating then,” Buffy pointed out, “Willow needs to know how you feel, this is the most important thing that has ever happened to her and you are her oldest friend, she was terrified that she might lose you, lose all of us when we found out.”
“That’s crazy,” Xander blurted out, “I can’t imagine ever falling out with Willow, she is closer to me than my family.”
“Then tell her that, you don’t have to understand just believe me when I tell you this matters to her.”
“What matters to who?” Willow asked, arriving at the end of the conversation.
“What, oh nothing,” Buffy covered up hastily, “hey Will, how come you stopped dancing?”
“You need to ask,” Willow mimed covering her ears as Buffy registered that the music had switched again to some overly histrionic nu-metal band.
“Oh right,” Buffy nodded, “not suitable for smooching huh?”
“We weren’t smooching,” Willow protested.
“You were,” Xander interjected, “and why wouldn’t you when you have such a hot girlfriend to smooch with.”
“Xander!”
“Tell me I am wrong,” Xander laughed, “Tara is pretty smoochable and I know what that look in your eyes means, I recognise the signs of Willow bitten by the love bug.”
“He’s got you there Will,” Buffy grinned, “you never were any good at hiding your feelings, especially from us.”
“Ok, there may have been some smooching,” Willow conceded as she stole a glance at Tara who was blushing furiously, “but can we please change the subject now?”
“Sure, actually Will I want to ask you something,” Xander began as the music changed again to something a lot more agreeable, “can I get the next dance?”
“Um ok,” Willow looked surprised but took Xander’s hand as he led her out onto the dance floor and the two fell into their usual habit of exaggerating their lack of rhythm for their own amusement.
The song finished and Willow turned to walk back to the table but halted as she saw Anya deep in conversation with Tara. Anya was talking animatedly and something she said caused Tara to laugh out loud, Willow was struck once again by just how beautiful Tara looked, especially when she was happy as she was right now. Willow realised that for the first time she could recall she found herself warming to Anya, anyone who could make her Tara laugh could not be all bad, Tara had indicated that she thought Willow had misjudged Anya and perhaps she was right.
“She looks beautiful Will.” She had forgotten Xander was standing right next to her.
“Yes she does.”
“It’s not about how she looks though is it,” he continued, “this is the real thing, like how it’s supposed to be in your dreams.”
“It is,” Willow agreed happily, “I don’t know how to explain it Xander but she is everything I have been looking for.”
“I know, I didn’t get it right away but I can see now that you two are perfect for each other.”
“You think so?”
“I know so Will, she is crazy about you and I have never seen you happier,” Xander gave Willow’s shoulder an affectionate squeeze as he continued, “I want you to know how happy I am for you.”
“I hoped you would be,” Willow smiled at Xander, “and you really do like Tara?”
“I pretty much love her Will,” Xander was surprised at the emotion in his own voice, “she makes my best friend happier than I have ever seen her so that makes her pretty wonderful in my book.”
“She is wonderful Xander,” Willow felt a rush of affection for the young man who had been such a big part of her life, “I am just so glad that everyone I care about seems to get that.”
The two stood in silence for a few moments, slightly overwhelmed by the emotions they were feeling until Xander, uncomfortable as ever when things turned serious, decided it was time to change the mood. “Hey will, I just thought of something.”
“Huh, what’s that?”
“Well, looking at Tara,” Xander began with a grin that gave away his intent to tease, “she has the blonde hair, the great figure and I was wondering…does this explain why you used to tape Baywatch?”
“Xander!” Willow punched his arm in mock outrage even though she knew he was only being true to his nature, using humour to conceal his true emotions.
“I was only asking,” Xander whined, “and by the way, ow.”
Willow was no longer listening though as she walked back over to the table and the woman she loved.
………………………………………………………………
Willow slipped her hand into her jacket pocket for the hundredth time as Tara pushed open the door to her room, her fingers brushing the velvet of the gift box that she had brought with her for this moment. She followed Tara into the room and pushed the door closed behind her, revelling as she always did in the sensation of being here alone with Tara in their private world.
“Good night sweetie?”
“Best night,” Willow confirmed, “although I hope it isn’t over yet.”
“Oh, it’s n-not over,” Tara slid her arms around Willow’s waist, “I have been waiting to get you alone all night.”
“Well, you got me,” Willow hugged Tara and they shared a brief kiss before she continued, “but first there is something I have to do.”
“What is it?” Tara sensed the slight nervousness emanating from Willow but was also aware of an overwhelming feeling of love directed toward her.
“I want you to know how serious I am about us, what we have together,” Willow explained, “I love you completely and I wanted to find a way to show you,” she slipped her hand into her pocket and pulled out the box, “I hope you don’t think I am presuming too much but I bought something today, something that says I love you when I am not there to tell you myself.”
“Willow you d-don’t need to buy..”
“Tara, I know I don’t need to buy you things, I know you would never ask for anything from me but this is something that I want you to have, I want us to have actually,” Willow looked pleadingly into Tara’s eyes, “please open the box.”
Tara took the box from Willow, trying to still the shaking in her hand as she wondered just what Willow could have bought and how she could ever repay the gesture. With trembling fingers she flipped open the lid of the box and saw the matched pair of rings nestled on the velvet lining, the gold reflecting in the light as she felt her eyes fill with tears of happiness. “Willow, they are so b-beautiful.”
“Do you know what they symbolise?” Willow asked softly, she had guessed that Tara would know, her interest in Celtic history and mythology was one of the first things Willow had learned about her.
“I do,” Tara nodded, “the Claddagh ring worn on the left hand,” she took one of the rings from the box and placed it on the ring finger of Willow’s left hand, “with the heart pointing inward and the crown outward,” she slid the ring along Willow’s finger as Willow picked up the second ring with her free hand.
“Means your heart is truly spoken for.” Willow slipped the second ring onto Tara’s ring finger and as she finished leaned in and captured Tara’s lips in a kiss that felt timeless in its perfection.
Breaking contact for a moment Willow whispered softly, “my heart is yours forever.”
“Forever and always,” Tara answered and she knew it to be true.
_________________ TARA: Breakfast will make all things better. WILLOW: Ooh, pancakes could go in bellies.
Bargaining
|