She smelt something on the dance floor.Tis the season for Lynx.
Or at least for any male aged pre-pubescent onwards, a Lynx gift set is almost a certainty to be rocking up in your present haul. There’s Lady Lynx now too so no one is safe.
For people outside the UK, Lynx is that really common body spray which will be ingrained into your memory as it’s that stench that seeped into the very foundations of the boy’s changing rooms. Often your first partners odour. The invisible barrier around any gathering of youths (although now I imagine its weed or fruity vapes). You might be familiar with that gravitating ambience in a scent. Also known as Axe. Yeah you know it.
Lynx’s advertising surrounds itself in the concept that if you spray it on yourself, immediately you’ll be met with a charging herd of lustful bodacious women. There has been angels falling from the heavens once they get a whiff (fallen angels are demons but they don’t go into that). Even a potbellied man theatrically spraying his hairy chest at the beach makes bikini clad women hurdle over people buried in the sand, towel loungers and various, now unattended, children(the dads aren’t effected by Lynx, make of that lynx commentary as you will) just to get to this user of pressurised elixir.
A popular scent is Lynx Africa. Likely due to Toto.
For this candle collection the advert will be in black and white. We see a woman walking through a busy high street. She pauses. Slips a hand into her bag. Another woman gasps noticing the act. Out comes a candle which our main woman rubs on her chest and continues to walk. The shopping crowds part like the red sea. Cut to a spark in colour. Cut to multiple sparks in colour. Every person she passes now hold up a lit lighter and turn away for no one can hold a light to this candle. She is the flame to her own Tara Collection Candle.
Africa by Toto plays throughout.
Now to the scents, which brings us to this week’s poll –
“Which Tara Collection Candle would you most likely purchase?”
Flora Favourites – Your nose won’t get hella bored with this candle of hellebore.
Misconstrued Mastication – Apple sauce with notes of your lover’s hair.
Calling – All the scents of plywood and varnish to capture the aroma of residential doors.
Perspective Populous – Unscented.
Dutiful Denial – They aren’t in a ditch, just smelling one. Roadside ditch scent.
Mindfulness – Choose your own scent, then be powerless to the selection of scents other people override yours with.
Ambience – Scented with the fragrance of overheated fairy light battery packs.
Breathe Beloved – Smells snakey.
Decadent Delicatessen – Vicariously sail the high seas on a fisherman’s boat when taking in lungs full of tuna.
College Call-backs – Relive the young adult frolics with the smells of cat pee in a confided room and singed carpet.
Gentle Gentry – Smells of tea and deprecation.
Faux Fancy – Smells of Jonathan, combo deal with the Jonathan calendar.
Understudy – Fully fragranced with authentic greasy kitchen smells. Made with organic wax sourced from fast food workers. Slight notes of cherry pie.
All The Above – It sounded convincing when you thought of it.
Other – Pick a name, pick smell and it’s a sell.
I should have put none as an option but that doesn't bring in the theoretical moolah.
I'll go with Ambience. I'm constantly sniffing my laptop charger anyway. if anything it will make me sniff check more.
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One Shots -
Basement Grotto -
Door 25 -
"You're My Always" -
"Do You Like Cats?"You don't have to write to contribute to the board, feedback can be its own event - Dubs Festive Advent Challenge -
Fic Club -
Pens Write A Holiday StoryExisting at some point, maybe - The Justice for Tara series.
*Rides in on a tricycle* Wanna play a game? -
Five Minutes of Artistic Integrity -
Those Three Little Words -
Sassy Synonyms -
Aradia's Antonyms