Infinitely(Sequel to Inevitable)[Ongoing - July 29th 2026]

[taranwillow4ever]

DIBS



This was a very sweet episode. Thanks for not putting Buffy in mortal danger. Looking forward to hearing how the program went for the kids.

Thanks for writing.

[TheBigPineapple99]

I'm glad everyone is enjoying the trip to the big city! I've been a bit too busy to post responses lately, in part because of my own move to the city, but I like the way you're including storylines for characters besides Willow and Tara as well. I love our girls as well, but their friendships with others has always been one of the things I've really enjoyed from the show too, so it's been really nice to see! I've also enjoyed reading about their experience with New York while newly experiencing it myself, so the timing has also been great!

[Laragh]

taranwillow4ever —

DIBS

This was a very sweet episode. Thanks for not putting Buffy in mortal danger. Looking forward to hearing how the program went for the kids.

No vamps for Buffy, just gold ol bad boys!

Thanks for writing.

Thanks for commenting!

TheBigPineapple99 —

I’m glad everyone is enjoying the trip to the big city! I’ve been a bit too busy to post responses lately, in part because of my own move to the city, but I like the way you’re including storylines for characters besides Willow and Tara as well. I love our girls as well, but their friendships with others has always been one of the things I’ve really enjoyed from the show too, so it’s been really nice to see!

It’s always an interesting balance to let W/T be the main but still allow side storylines to develop! I’m glad you’re enjoying it!

I’ve also enjoyed reading about their experience with New York while newly experiencing it myself, so the timing has also been great!

I hope you have an absolutely amazing time!!!!

Thanks so much for your feedback!

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Update Directly Below

[Laragh]

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Finding Your People

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And I’m Marching On To The Beat I Drum
I’m Not Scared To Be Seen
I Make No Apologies, This Is Me

By the time Willow and Tara reached the Courant Institute building, Willow had craned her neck upward three separate times like she expected the words Future Genius Convention to appear glowing across the front of it.


“It still sounds fake,” she said as they crossed the lobby. “Math camp at NYU when you’re twelve! That’s the plot of an inspirational coming-of-age movie. I wonder if we could sell the rights to Hollywood. I couldn’t sell my own rights. Always last to get the punchline. Left alone to think at lunchtime.”


“Got early admission to her dream school and every safety school she applied to…” Tara intoned in a soft sing-song voice.


Willow blushed and smiled softly.


“Abandoned it all for the girl of my dreams. Now there’s my true Hollywood story.”


Tara’s eyes creased affectionately, and she sighed as they walked through the glass doors.


“It feels a lot better picking her up than dropping her off.”


“Definitely less…fraught,” Willow agreed. “Look at this place! It’s like I can smell the mathematics being solved!”


As they closed behind them, the muted hum of Mercer Street was left outside for the bustle of the building. Even in the middle of the day during summer, there was an intensity to the place, as if every classroom and office contained someone trying to solve a problem nobody had solved before. Students of varying ages drifted through in loose clusters, and purple NYU banners and signs pointed toward lecture halls, elevators, and offices in every corner.


A security desk stood near the entrance, its monitors glowing quietly while visitors checked in and students flashed ID cards without breaking stride. They got visitor badges, which they clipped proudly on their belt loops.


Beyond the lobby, broad hallways branched toward classrooms and seminar rooms. Bulletin boards were crowded with flyers for research talks, programming workshops, mathematics colloquia, and graduate student events. Elevators opened and closed constantly, carrying professors, researchers, and students to the upper floors where offices and research groups were tucked away. Snatches of conversation floated through the air: fragments of code, equations, machine learning models, deadlines, proofs. Everywhere, there was a sense of people thinking hard about complicated things.


It smelled faintly of coffee, paper, and the recycled air of a building that never truly slept. Tara guessed this was the smell of math and noted it was very reminiscent of what Willow smelled like after a day of labs.


She smiled to herself as they approached the elevators and pressed the button to the floor Sally had told them she was on. Sally had kept in touch, but honestly seemed so busy that some days they only got a cursory text at bedtime.


Now, though, Tara could already hear familiar voices echoing down the hallway before the elevator doors had even fully opened.


“THEY’RE HERE!”


A blur in mismatched socks and an oversized Courant t-shirt came hurtling toward them. Azalea screeched to a stop at the last possible second, arms pinwheeling for balance before she caught herself against the wall.


“Hi,” she said, breathless, then, with complete seriousness. “Okay. We’ve organized the afternoon chronologically and intellectually.”


Willow blinked.


“I’m sorry?”


Sally appeared behind her, already changed out of her camp shirt and looking significantly more composed.


“She means we planned a route.”


Az nodded.


“Efficiency matters. We learned that here. I already knew, but now I REALLY know!”


Tara barely had time to open her arms before Sally stepped into the hug. Tara held her tightly, immediately noticing two things at once: Sally smelled faintly like the scented marker set Willow had gifted her, and somehow, in only three weeks, she seemed older.


“Hey, sweetheart.”


“Hi.”


Sally leaned against her for an extra second before pulling away with a practiced sort of casualness, like she was trying to remember she was twelve and sophisticated now.


Az pointed dramatically down the hallway.


“Tour first. Emotional reunion second.”


“I just gave my sister a hug,” Sally argued.


“That was a preliminary emotional reunion,” Az argued back, pointing again. “We made plans! You were there! You made most of them.”


Sally glanced at Willow and Tara and sighed.


“We did make plans.”


Willow grinned.


“Lead the way.”


The floor buzzed with end-of-camp energy. Students hauled suitcases down corridors while parents lingered awkwardly near whiteboards filled with equations none of them could understand. Every available surface seemed covered in notes, symbols, or half-finished proofs.


Willow looked ready to ascend into another plane of existence.


“Oh my god,” she whispered reverently. “This is incredible.”


Tara smiled fondly.


“You’re acting as if we brought you to Disney World.”


“Disney World can kick rocks,” Willow replied in awe.


“Along with Goofy!” Sally agreed with a curt nod.


“You still never told me what happened with, um, him,” Tara said with a somewhat concerned crease in her brow.


Sally’s eyes narrowed almost cartoonishly.


“He knows. He knows.”


Az immediately latched onto Willow’s enthusiasm and pulled on her sleeve.


“Okay, come here, this room was for combinatorics lectures, and over there is where Sally annihilated a high school senior from Massachusetts.”


Sally groaned.


“Can you stop saying annihilated? It makes me sound like the Terminator.”


“He deserved it,” Az said as she lifted her nose defiantly.


“He was, like, sixteen,” Sally replied, shaking her head. “I think being beaten by a twelve-year-old girl broke his brain a little.”


Az huffed.


“He was condescending.”


“That’s true,” Sally admitted, leaning into Tara for affection while trying to seem like she wasn’t. “Az thought every competition was like a West Side Story-style turf war. I also learned what West Side Story is because she puts it on to sleep every night.”


She paused.


“I thought of you every time I heard ‘I Feel Pretty.’ Especially the ‘pretty and witty and gay’ part.”


“That’s very sweet,” Tara whispered back.


Az spun around dramatically as they entered a classroom covered wall to wall with whiteboards.


“This,” she announced. “Was the site of my greatest triumph.”


“There are like six possible stories that could be,” Sally muttered.


Az puffed her chest proudly.


“I solved a problem none of the counselors could solve.”


Sally grinned.


“You also accidentally locked yourself in the study lounge for two hours afterward.”


Az waved a hand.


“That was a separate triumph. It was the only free time I got to update my fanfiction.”


Tara laughed as Willow wandered toward one of the whiteboards covered in formulas. She traced her fingers just above the marker lines without touching them, eyes bright.


“You guys worked all this out?”


Sally nodded, suddenly animated in a way she’d only begun to express since coming to live with Willow and Tara.


“This one was from team rounds,” she explained, stepping beside Willow. “The trick was realizing everybody else was approaching it geometrically when it worked way better algebraically.”


Az grabbed a marker off the tray beneath the board.


“No, no, the real trick was reimagining the framework entirely.”


“You say that about everything,” Sally scoffed.


“Because everything benefits from framework reimagining,” Az said as she immediately started sketching wildly across an empty section of the board while talking at approximately triple normal speaking speed. “So if you stop thinking linearly and instead treat the variables like relational clusters–”


“She talks like this all the time now,” Sally told Willow quietly.


“And you understand her?” Willow asked with a raised eyebrow, because honestly, she only barely did.


Sally nodded slowly.


“Sadly, yes.”


Tara watched the two girls argue enthusiastically over equations that even Willow didn’t entirely follow.


She didn’t have the context, she told herself.


What struck Tara most wasn’t how smart they were. Tara already knew Sally was smart. Sometimes, she even suspected Sally was smarter than Willow, though she’d never say that aloud. But what really got her attention was how comfortable she looked.


Sally had spent so much of her life trying not to take up space. Trying not to sound too excited about things. Trying not to be ‘too much’ or ‘too noticed’ because being noticed meant being persecuted.


Here, surrounded by kids who debated number theory recreationally, she looked completely at ease, not just with the numbers but with herself.


Az finally capped the marker triumphantly.


“And that is why symmetry is basically emotional.”


Willow stared at the board for a long moment.


“You know,” she said slowly. “I think I get that. At least 40% anyway.”


Az beamed.


“That’s honestly above average.”


Willow seemed a little affronted at that. Tara wrapped an arm around her waist.


“Don’t worry, honey. I know you’re extraordinary.”


Willow smiled and kissed Tara’s cheek. Sally rolled her eyes.


“Didn’t miss that.”


The tour continued through dorm lounges, lecture halls, cafeterias, and study rooms occupied by exhausted campers sprawled across beanbags with notebooks balanced on their knees.


Every few feet, one of the girls stopped to explain another story.


“That vending machine stole Az’s money four separate times.”


“It targeted me specifically,” Az nodded sagely, before pointing in another direction. “Sally stayed up until three a.m., proving a counselor wrong in that room.”


“He said it couldn’t be solved elegantly,” Sally argued. “I showed him I have elegance up my butt!”


Az dragged them into the student lounge, where several campers were saying emotional goodbyes.


A tall boy waved from across the room.


“Hey, Sally!”


Sally waved back.


“Hey, Tray!”


“You still sending the proof?” he asked, giving her finger guns.


“After we get home!” Sally promised. “I want to look over it one more time.”


The boy gave her the thumbs up and pointed accusingly at Az.


“And you still owe me twenty bucks!”


Az gasped.


“That bet was made under emotional duress.”


Tray arched an eyebrow.


“YOU LOST.”


She waved dismissively.


“Details.”


As they moved on, Willow leaned toward Tara.


“They have little math camp social lives.”


“I know,” Tara smiled back.


“It’s adorable,” Willow grinned. “Was band camp like this?”


Tara’s eyes widened.


“I sincerely hope this was nothing like band camp.”


By the time they finally collected luggage and headed outside, both girls were talking over each other at full speed.


“And then on Saturday, we went to Chinatown. This kid from Topeka didn’t know how to use chopsticks, and Sally tried to convince him you used your nose–”


“And Washington Square Park had this guy playing jazz on upside-down buckets–”


“And we saw a pigeon steal an entire hot dog–”


“I swear I heard him say ‘I’m eating over here’,” Sally said seriously. “Then we went to the Strand bookstore and Az bought six books.”


“They were necessary,” Azalea nodded.


Sally’s brow lifted.


“One of them was literally called Topology for Fun.”


Azalea grinned as she skipped ahead.


“It WAS fun.”


Willow looked deeply impressed by this and shot Tara a look.


“You know, we walk right past it on the way back…”


Tara was unable to deny her love anything.


“Should we stop on the way to check it out?”


It was the least she could give back after Willow’s wonderful morning.


“YAY!” Azalea started to run ahead, only slowed down by the bag bouncing on its wheels behind her.


Willow had to speed up to keep up with her, but it wasn’t really a hardship as her excitement was close to the same level.


The giant red awning stretched across the corner storefront like some kind of holy site.


“Eighteen miles of books,” Willow whispered in awe.


Tara laughed through a labored breath.


“Why does that sound like our credit card is about to be raided?”


The four of them crossed with the crowd as taxis surged past in noisy yellow blurs.


The second the bookstore doors opened, cool air and the smell of old books wrapped around them.


Willow froze.


Not metaphorically, she actually stopped moving mid-step.


“Oh,” she breathed.


Az looked smug.


“That was basically my reaction too.”


Willow turned in a slow circle beneath the handwritten recommendation signs and towering shelves.


“I need everyone to understand that if you lose me in here, I live here now. I don’t need to be rescued.”


“You can’t legally abandon us for a bookstore,” Tara said with an amused smile.


“Can’t I?” Willow asked, for one of the rare times her affection was being pulled somewhere other than Tara. “I mean, I won’t but…”


Az had already wandered ten feet away toward a calculus display table titled: ‘Mathematics: Nature’s Beauty’.


“Found my people,” she announced.


Sally immediately followed after her while Tara and Willow drifted more slowly through the front section.


The store felt alive in a way only old bookstores did. Narrow aisles twisted unexpectedly into tiny alcoves. Shelves stretched so high they required rolling ladders. Every available space overflowed with stacked books and handwritten staff notes.


Willow picked up a copy of Gödel, Escher, Bach and smiled immediately.


“Oh, wow, I haven’t seen this edition in years.”


“You say that like you found a childhood friend,” Tara said gently, inviting Willow to explain at her own pace.


Willow lifted the book just under her nose and inhaled deeply. The smell of old books would only be overtaken by the newborn smell of her own children, but until then, it reigned supreme, as long as any smell belonging to Tara was taken out of the equation.


“I kind of did. It was my babysitter for a whole summer. First book to truly blow my mind.”


A few aisles over, Az had begun constructing a dangerously tall stack in her arms.


“You do not need six more books,” Sally told her.


Azalea nodded.


“You’re right. I need at least eight.”


Sally raised an eyebrow.


“You can’t even fit those in your suitcase.”


Az looked genuinely offended.


“I brought an empty duffel bag for a reason.”


“You planned for bookstore overflow?” Sally questioned, but regretted it almost immediately.


“I planned for all outcomes,” Azalea nodded seriously.


Sally shook her head and picked up another book.


“The Joy of x,” she read like she knew it was a pun but couldn’t quite figure out why.


Az snatched it immediately.


“OH, MY GOD.”


“That was not an endorsement!” Sally protested.


Azalea was already flicking through it.


“Too late.”


Willow appeared beside them like she’d been summoned psychically by the phrase.


“Oh! Steven Strogatz!” she pointed excitedly at the cover. “This book is amazing.”


Az looked delighted that an adult understood what she was talking about.


For the next several minutes, the two of them disappeared into rapid-fire discussion while Sally and Tara watched with helpless amusement.


“…because recreational math is really about curiosity more than difficulty-”


“Exactly! And people think math has to be rigid when actually the fun part is experimentation-”


“And puzzles!”


“And paradoxes!”


“And impossible geometry!”


Tara leaned toward Sally quietly, realizing something.


“They’re the same person.”


“Little and large,” Sally muttered back. “I didn’t realize it ‘til just now.”


“Me either,” Tara replied and didn’t think Willow would be too grateful for the comparison.


Though she thought Sally was correct about a few things she’d mentioned over the three weeks: Azalea was ‘calmer’, just still in her unique, high-energy kind of way.


Her wildness was now confidence, and with that, she seemed better able to control it. Before, she might have been pacing in circles around the room while having three conversations at once. Now, while still overflowing with excitement and energy, it was focused on the topic at hand, and her body moved with her, not twitching inordinately like it didn’t know where to go.


Tara wasn’t sure exactly what had changed. Az was still Az. Still energetic, still excited. But that energy seemed focused now, and happier in the process.


Eventually, the girls dragged them upstairs, where the rare books floor sat quieter and dimmer than the bustling main level below.


While Tara was tempted by a section of artist biographies, Sally slowed near a shelf of antique mathematics texts displayed behind glass.


“Look at this. They wouldn’t let us get too close when we came here before. There was a grabby guy from Greensboro.”


Even Az lowered her voice instinctively.


One enormous leather-bound volume sat open beneath soft lights, pages yellowed with age and covered in delicate handwritten notation.


Willow stepped closer carefully.


“People figured all this stuff out without computers,” she murmured, sounding genuinely awed. “Just… brains and stubbornness.”


Az scrunched her nose and grinned.


“Hardcore.”


Tara glanced over and smiled at the three of them standing there shoulder-to-shoulder, staring at centuries-old equations like museum artifacts.


There was something oddly emotional about it.


Downstairs again, they eventually migrated toward the fiction section. Az immediately became distracted by science fiction covers, Sally wandered toward fantasy, and Willow disappeared entirely.


Tara found her twenty minutes later, sitting cross-legged on the floor beside a lower shelf, reading the first page of a used novel.


“You got distracted.”


Willow looked up sheepishly.


“I’m book shopping.”


“You’re actively reading,” Tara replied, bending down so they were eye-level.


Willow turned her nose up indignantly.


“Those are related activities.”


Tara smiled and offered her a hand up.


By the time they reached the checkout counter, Az’s stack had become genuinely alarming.


The cashier raised an eyebrow.


“Starting a library?”


“She kind of already has one,” Sally said.


Az carefully placed another book onto the pile at the last second.


“Okay, but this one was fifty percent off.”


“You said that about the last four,” Sally shook her head, but with affection. “You can’t keep using math as a justification for more books.”


Azalea looked at Sally like she was crazy.


“I can use math as a justification for EVERYTHING!”


Willow’s purchases weren’t much better.


Tara stared at the total while Willow avoided eye contact.


“We can never come back here,” Tara informed her.


“Yes, we can,” Willow argued defensively.


Tara raised an eyebrow.


“No, because you’ll bankrupt us.”


Willow grinned.


“It’ll be worth it. We can decorate a cute box to live in. You did tell me you’d follow me anywhere…”


Tara just raised an eyebrow.


Outside again, the late afternoon sun painted the sidewalks gold and cast a golden glimmer over each of them.


Az hugged her paper shopping bags to her chest like treasure.


“I’m genuinely happier than I’ve ever been.”


“You say that every fifteen minutes,” Sally pointed out.


Az just skipped ahead.


“Yes, but this time I’m holding calculus, which is basically my bible, so you know I really mean it.”


Willow laughed so hard a small wheeze came out, and they had to stop for a water break.


After leaving all of the bags and luggage back in the hotel room, which the girls seemed excited about despite it not being all that different from a dorm room, they headed toward the theater district.


The streets buzzed with tourists and traffic and neon signs beginning to glow against the darkening sky. Tara had suggested lunch, but apparently, Willow had pre-ordered special snacks and drinks to have during the show, so they each just grabbed a pretzel to eat on the way.


Sally walked between Willow and Tara while Az zigzagged unpredictably around them like an excitable satellite, but notably, she never went out of their sight, and it was less chaotic than both Willow and Tara were expecting with her.


“Why does it smell like pee everywhere anyway? I kept asking, but no one would answer me.”


The questions, however, were as inquisitive as ever.


Sally rolled her eyes.


“It’s not pee, it’s weed,” she said as if she hadn’t just been informed of that a day or two ago herself by an older kid.


Willow and Tara exchanged alarmed looks.


“Let’s stick with pee,” Willow said as she brought her hand down on Sally’s shoulder.


They did not need Azalea’s mom hounding them for informing her daughter that.


It was odd enough that they hadn’t had their phones blow up already from her.


“My mom says the poppies outside our house are like weeds,” Azalea replied, rather naïve for a girl who was so smart.


“Nuh uh, it’s like…dandelions, I guess?” Sally continued with undue confidence. “And people put them in like…brownies and stuff?”


The older kid hadn’t been very explicit.


This time, the looks Willow and Tara shot each other were a mix of relief and slight amusement.


“I don’t know why anyone would want to eat them, though!” Sally shook her head like she had the wisdom of the universe in her brain.


“Yeah, no…no idea,” Willow said, clearing her throat silently and checking her watch. “Hey, um, we need to hurry up a bit.”


“We’re not late, are we?” Tara asked as they picked up pace.


Willow put her hand on Tara’s back and gently pushed her forward.


“Just, um…come on.”


As they turned into Times Square, Willow suddenly stopped them all.


“Here! Hang on a minute.”


They all stopped, but the kids got antsy quickly and were distracted by all the hubbub.


“Willow, what’s going on?” Tara asked when Willow continued, just looking up.


“Just…one minute!” Willow replied in frustration.


The other three exchanged confused looks while the minute passed until Willow started jumping up and down, pointedly excited.


“There, there! Look! Quick!”


There, in the middle of Times Square, a giant billboard displayed a picture of Azalea and Sally beneath a large banner that said ‘Well Done!’


Azalea grabbed Sally, and they shared in shock before looking at each other and jumping up and down, screaming.


Tara looked at Willow in utter surprise.


“How the hell did you organize that?”


“I got a few tricks up my sleeve,” Willow grinned back, then scrunched her nose sheepishly. “It’s surprisingly cheap to rent a billboard for a minute. I just thought it might be something they didn’t do already. I booked it three weeks ago and spent the last two days panicking we’d miss the time slot.”


Tara wanted to sweep Willow up right there and then, but settled for putting their hands together and squeezing tightly.


The billboard was all Sally and Az could talk about as they made their way to the theater, figuring out who they could brag about it to and who looked best fifty feet in the air.


“There it is!” Willow pointed dramatically the second the Lyric Theatre came into view.


“You’re more excited than we are,” Sally said.


“Who wouldn’t be?” Willow replied breathlessly.


She stopped dead in front of the giant Harry Potter and the Cursed Child sign.


“Oh my god,” she whispered. “We’re actually here.”


Az tilted her head.


“I thought adulthood meant pretending not to care about things.”


Tara laughed.


“Not in this family.”


Inside the theater, Willow immediately collected her souvenir program, commemorative cup, and something involving a glowing golden snitch that Tara wasn’t sure had a purpose.


“It lights up,” Willow defended against the look she got.


“You say that like it explains anything,” Tara returned with a shake of her head.


“It explains everything,” Az said as she rolled her own snitch between her palms.


Willow just looked smug.


Their seats were incredible. Perfect view of the stage with no obstruction and leg room to boot. They each settled with their snacks around them, and Willow unwrapped her chocolate frog.


“These things are doing a lot to redeem the frog community,” she said through a mouthful of chocolate.


As the theater dimmed, Willow physically bounced once in her chair.


Tara leaned closer and rested her head on Willow’s shoulder.


The opening music began.


Willow went absolutely still. Tara wasn’t entirely sure whether she’d done that or the orchestra had.


For the next several hours, Willow reacted to every effect with complete sincerity and delight. She gasped at scene changes. She whispered theories. She clutched Tara’s arm every time stage magic happened.


At one point, an actor appeared to vanish in front of them.


Willow’s jaw dropped open.


“How?”


“Special effects,” Sally whispered.


“No,” Willow said firmly. “Wizardry.”


Sally rolled her eyes but appeared to be enjoying the show anyway.


By intermission, the girls were openly making fun of her.


Az sipped her (diet) soda thoughtfully.


“You know, statistically speaking, Willow is currently outperforming us in visible excitement.”


“By a lot,” Sally agreed.


Willow looked smug about this accusation.


“I’m embracing wonder.”


“You almost stood up during the duel scene,” Sally countered.


“I was being SUPPORTIVE!” Willow defended.


Tara laughed so hard she nearly spilled her drink. She had missed this banter.


The second act somehow made Willow even more emotional.


By the curtain call, she was applauding with the intensity of someone personally invested in the continued success of theater as an art form and a force for good in the world.


“That,” she announced as they exited onto the street. “Was AMAZING.”


Tara bumped her shoulder gently.


“Better than you expected?”


“So much better,” Willow said, clutching her heart.


Az nodded seriously.


“The time-turner staging alone was worth detailed analysis.”


Willow immediately pointed at her.


“See? This is why I love you.”


Tara didn’t mention the names she’d called her just a couple of weeks ago in private.


Tribeca was quieter than Midtown by the time they arrived after a ride on the subway.


The city had settled into nighttime rhythms, storefront lights glowing warmly against the sidewalks. Willow spotted the Ghostbusters firehouse before anyone else.


“There!” she yelped.


She took off down the sidewalk with such enthusiasm that Tara actually stumbled back.


“She’s running.”


“She’s absolutely running,” Sally added, deadpan.


“It’s a historical landmark,” Willow called back defensively.


“It’s a garage door,” Sally called to her.


Willow stopped in front of the firehouse and stared upward with genuine joy.


The familiar red sign hung over the building exactly like every photograph and movie shot she’d ever seen. She’d been in New York more than once with her parents, but something like this had always been considered too frivolous for her to see. Ghostbusters had been one of the movies she and Xander and Jesse had watched together as kids, and her enjoyment of it had made her ‘one of the guys’ with them, a position important to her growing up.


Short of seeing an actual mermaid from her and Tara’s connection to The Little Mermaid, this was probably the most magical childhood artifact she could witness.


“Oh, wow.”


Az squinted critically.


“You know, architecturally speaking, it’s smaller than I expected.”


Willow glanced over at Az like she suddenly remembered all of those names.


“You are ruining this experience for me.”


“Surely spatial realism can only enhance it,” Az challenged.


Tara pulled out her phone quickly to diffuse.


“Okay, picture time.”


Willow immediately grabbed Sally and Az around the shoulders.


“No, wait, everybody has to look serious. Like we’re paranormal investigators.”


“Why can’t I have a normal sister?” Sally groaned automatically.


Tara smiled softly at the word even as Willow gasped dramatically.


“You called me your sister!”


Sally groaned.


“I take it back.”


“Nope,” Willow replied, popping the p. “Too late. Canon now.”


Az raised one hand solemnly.


“I believe in ghosts but only mathematically.”


Tara looked deeply confused, but that wasn’t unusual with their little family. She stepped in front of them and crouched down, lifting her phone high above her head.


“Everyone say Ghostbusters!”


The picture captured Willow and Az grinning with joy, Sally giving them side-eye, and Tara wearing her usual expression of polite bewilderment in the front.


Eventually, hunger drove them toward a tiny pizza place that was crowded but had a perfect booth for them by the window.


The smell hit them before they even got inside: cheese, garlic, warm dough, and grease.


“Now,” Willow announced as they slid into the booth. “THIS is the authentic New York experience.”


“We already had New York pizza,” Sally said, bored.


“Not with us, you didn’t!” Willow retorted, then glanced toward the entrance. “Oh, hey, Buffy! You found us!”


Buffy looked over at the sound of her name and waved, plenty of shopping bags shaking on her wrist.


Tara frowned just slightly. Money was already tight for the Summers family, which made the designer logos swinging from Buffy’s wrist difficult to ignore. She couldn’t help but wonder if it was part of her ‘going wild’. Still, it wasn’t her place to judge Buffy’s spending habits, and she quickly replaced her frown with a smile.


“Did you have a nice day, Buffy?”


Buffy lifted her sunglasses above her head and revealed weary eyes, but she did smile.


“I certainly experienced New York.”


The slices arrived, bigger than the paper plates they were served on.


Az stared at hers in awe.


“This is structurally unsound.”


“That’s part of the charm,” Willow said, expertly folding hers in half.


Sally copied her immediately.


Tara shook her head.


“Good god that’s a lot of pizza.”


Az took a massive bite and immediately hissed in pain.


“Hot-hot-hot-hot.”


“Slow down,” Sally laughed.


“Worth it,” Az mumbled through molten cheese.


The restaurant buzzed around them with overlapping conversations, clattering dishes, and music playing faintly somewhere near the kitchen.


Outside, taxis streaked past the windows in blurred yellow flashes. They decided to get one of those back to the hotel since they’d all done the subway already, plus it was another experience under their belt. Willow offered to grab a second cab for Buffy since they wouldn’t all fit in one, but she said she wanted to experience the energy of the city for as long as possible.


Arriving back at the hotel room, Sally looked exhausted.


Not unhappy or annoyed, just full of pizza and life.


Three weeks of learning, excitement, and independence sat softly around her shoulders.


With Azalea in the shower, Tara reached over and brushed a strand of hair back from Sally’s face.


“So,” she asked gently. “Was camp everything you hoped?”


Sally looked down at her lap for a second before a smile tugged at her mouth.


“More. There were people who actually understood what we were talking about.”


“There are people who understand what you’re talking about here, too,” Willow pointed out.


“Yeah, but usually after explanations and diagrams,” Sally replied with a soft shrug.


She leaned back against the bed.


“I didn’t feel weird here.”


That a year ago, they could barely convince her to attend her new school wasn’t lost on anyone.


The words landed quietly between them.


Tara’s chest tightened.


Because Sally wasn’t weird. Neither was Az. They were brilliant and passionate and enthusiastic and occasionally overwhelming in the way bright people often were.


But the world had a way of making girls like them feel like too much.


Willow reached across and squeezed Sally’s hand.


“You know,” she said softly. “Finding your people changes everything.”


Sally smiled a little wider.


“Also, we learned enough advanced math to become supervillains.”


“So you think you want to come to NYU to go to college?” Willow asked with an approving grin.


Sally surprised them both with the speed of her answer.


“Nah.”


Tara raised an eyebrow.


“You seemed like you really loved it.”


“I did,” Sally answered with a quick nod. “But it’s not my whole life like it is for Az. She should definitely come here. I don’t even know if I wanna go to college. And if I do, I don’t know if it’d be here. I’m only 12. I mean, I like math, but I don’t want it to be everything I do.”


Tara leaned in and kissed the side of Sally’s head.


“Yes, you are. You don’t have to know anything yet.”


Willow nodded quickly.


“If I were where I thought I would be at your age, I’d be married to Xander, and we’d still be holding weekly meetings of the I hate Cordelia club.”


Sally looked utterly befuddled.


“Huh?”


Willow blushed.


“Never mind. What I’m saying is, nothing is set in stone. The truth about life, kid, is that you never stop solving for x.”


Sally slowly nodded and smiled.


“Please don’t tell Az that. I have to sleep next to her all night.”


Willow and Tara laughed.


“We’re proud of you,” Tara said, squeezing Sally’s hand before standing. “And not because of what you’ve achieved. But because of who you are.”


Sally wrapped her arms around a pillow and buried her head into it for a moment before lifting her gaze.


“Can we play D&D when we get home?”


Willow nodded keenly.


“Yeah, I’ll talk to Fred and see if she wants to get a campaign going.”


“Cool,” Sally smiled.


“Cool,” Willow agreed.


Tara caught Willow’s eye and gave her a sly wink, which Willow returned.


Now the only problem was how the hell to get all those books into their luggage?

[taranwillow4ever]

The reunion with the girls definitely didn't disappoint. I am really enjoying this story. I hope you don't get discouraged by the lack of feedback. Thanks for writing.
Taranwillow4ever

[Laragh]

taranwillow4ever —

The reunion with the girls definitely didn't disappoint. I am really enjoying this story. I hope you don't get discouraged by the lack of feedback. Thanks for writing.

Thank you! Feedback is a tricky beast in an old fandom, I learned a long time ago you have to be satisfied by the work and any feedback is a joyous bonus!

Thanks so much for your comment

---

Update Directly Below

[Laragh]

---

Lifeboats

---

I Have Become
Comfortably Numb

Tara walked down the aisle of the plane, stretching her legs as they headed into the homestretch of the flight.


Willow was watching movies on the in-flight entertainment, Azalea and Sally were making use of the game system, and Buffy, who was sitting several rows back and whom Tara only caught glimpses of when she got up to stretch, seemed to be fast asleep, still sporting those perennial sunglasses.


Tara frowned, which seemed to be becoming a common occurrence around Willow’s friend lately. She hoped Buffy knew she could come to her, too. The girl seemed like she could use as many friends as she could get.


She walked to the end of the plane, used the restroom, and returned to her seat beside Willow. She had the aisle seat so she could keep an eye on the kids on the other side, who seemed to be acting a lot calmer on the return than the reports they heard of the way out.


She didn’t envy Juniper, Azalea’s mom, that journey at all. They’d definitely gotten the better end of the deal.


She closed her eyes to rest for a minute, and the next thing she knew, Willow was nudging her shoulder.


“Baby? We landed.”


Tara blinked the sleep from her eyes as she realized everyone around her was standing and retrieving their bags.


She looked at Willow and let out a soft breath.


“I didn’t even realize I fell asleep.”


Willow smiled sympathetically but glanced toward the aisle, reminding Tara they needed to move.


Unsnapping her belt, Tara retrieved her purse from under the seat and stepped into the aisle to help the kids. She wasn’t quite sure what time it was when they stepped off the plane, but found herself glad to see it was dark already. She hoped it would be easier to settle the kids despite the many mini-cans of soda they’d consumed with the tiny bags of pretzels the flight attendant kept slipping to them.


Willow hung back at the jet bridge for Buffy, leaving Tara to make sure Azalea didn’t cartwheel across the baggage carousel. Thankfully, Sunnydale airport was even smaller than Burbank, so they got through it quickly, though not before stopping at a Burger King. Some fries made for a quiet journey home in the backseat, but Tara made them get waters with them since she figured their blood must be carbonated at this point.


“Looking forward to your own bed, Buff?” Willow asked in the front seat as Tara had graciously sat in the back. “You, uh, barely slept in the hotel one.”


Buffy was quiet. Her body felt beaten, and she actually liked it. A few nights in New York had seemed like an opportunity to escape the ties that bound her to Sunnydale, to her family, to the monotony of work and no play that had become her life, but she had discovered a deeper level of self-loathing that she hadn’t even acknowledged before.


“Barely slept at all,” she admitted with a smile, pushing it all down.


Back to the monotony.


She hopped out at her house and hugged Willow. Willow walked her to the door.


“Deep thoughts?”


“Deep and meaningful,” Buffy answered thoughtfully.


“As in?” Willow prompted gently.


Buffy raised her sunglasses for the first time that whole day. Her eyes were bloodshot, dark circles hanging beneath them. She dropped them again when Willow looked concerned.


“As in, I’m never getting out of here,” she found herself too tired to lie. “I kept thinking if I stopped Mom’s cancer or… But I was kidding myself. I mean, there is always going to be something. I’m a Sunnydale girl, no other choice.”


Willow’s expression softened.


“Buffy, taking care of people isn’t the same thing as being trapped.”


Buffy gave a small laugh.


“Maybe not. Feels the same some days.”


Willow looked like she wanted to argue.


“Don’t,” Buffy said quietly. “Not tonight.”


The door flew open then, and Dawn flew out.


“Hi, Willow!” she waved cheerily before visibly pushing Buffy. “What the heck? You just went to New York without telling me?!”


“You were asleep,” Buffy defended herself, but was given respite as Dawn suddenly screamed when she saw the others in the car and ran over.


Willow watched her go, then fixed her eyes back on Buffy.


“Buffy…”


Buffy held a hand up, then pulled Willow in for a hug.


“Thank you so much for the last couple of days. It means more than you know.”


At that moment, both of their phones pinged at the same time. They looked at each other and checked together. A single text from Xander in their trio group chat with a broken heart emoji.


“Oh, did they actually break up?” Willow asked, sounding unusually perky.


“Seem happier for our friend’s heartbreak, why don’t you?” Buffy replied sarcastically.


“Sorry,” Willow scrunched her nose. “I guess I could bring him out for a beer…”


Buffy threw her bag in the door and returned to the spot.


“I’m in.”


“Really?” Willow asked, swallowing slightly as she honestly just wanted to go home and snuggle with Tara.


Not to mention leaving Tara to solo parent, and that parenting was probably about to include Anya.


Buffy nodded.


“It’s nice. Foamy. Comforting.”


Willow hesitated.


Sally. Azalea. Tara.


Then again, Xander seemed like he’d either start crying or proposing to random strangers if somebody didn’t keep an eye on him.


“Okay,” she sighed. “But only for a couple.”


Tara appeared then, keeping an eye over her shoulder at the car.


“Um, the girls want to have a sleepover. Do you think your mom would mind?”


Willow’s eyes widened, and she held her hands up.


“Before we even go there, you should know I may have to disappear and not be very helpful with sugar, spice, and everything nice over there.”


“What’s wrong?” Tara asked with a furrowed brow.


Just then, her phone made a notification sound. Willow indicated for her to check it.


“Oh,” Tara said as her eyes scanned Anya’s vengeful message. “Oh yes, you’re right. You should probably keep Xander out of sight for a while.”


She tapped something in reply and pocketed her phone.


“Okay. Um, I’ll take the girls if it’s okay with Mrs. Summers. I’ll get them settled and invite Anya over so she doesn’t go through with her hammer plan.”


“What’s the hammer plan?” Buffy asked with a frown.


Tara just held her phone up for the message to read.


“Oh,” Buffy replied, paling.


With the okay from Joyce, Tara brought the girls home to a very accommodating Kimberly, who went so far as to help them set up a blanket fort in the living room. Thankfully, it was a balmy night, so Tara could keep Anya outside in the back yard, and while the neighbors probably got an earful, the kids didn’t.


“Anya, honey, you have to consider the fact that he didn’t actually cheat on you,” Tara said, sitting on a log and watching Anya pace back and forth with exaggerated hand movements.


Anya slapped her hands down on the outdoor table.


“He would have! He was going to kiss her! I know his ‘I’m about to kiss you’ face! I just walked in and ruined his fun!”


Her eyes blazed with fury.


“I’d like to ruin his fun once and for all!”


Across town in the Bronze, Xander drank back his third beer.


“I was happy! I was in love! Powerfully, painfully in love!”


“And you threw it all away for Cordelia Chase?” Willow asked in disbelief.


“But I didn’t!” Xander threw his hands up. “I just…almost did.”


He drained half his beer.


“Which is why this is so stupid. One stupid mistake. One stupid almost-kiss.”


His head dropped into his hands.


“But I didn’t! That should count, right?”

---

“They were this close!” Anya held her thumb and forefinger barely apart. “She already had her chance! He broke her heart because your girlfriend couldn’t keep her lips to herself–”


“Anya,” Tara lightly warned.


“–and now she’s got payback! By destroying the love we built!” Anya continued as she paced. “I’m nothing but attractive collateral damage!”


She dropped onto a log with a pout.


Tara considered her for a moment.


“It sounds like maybe they had some unfinished business?” she suggested gently.


“Yeah, REVENGE!” Anya retorted, then looked up suddenly. “We could drop a piano on her! It always works for that creepy cartoon rabbit running from that nice man with the speech impediment.”


Tara had often wanted to ask Anya how many cults she had grown up in, but she was too afraid of the answer.

---

“She was just…there. Looking at me like she used to. And she hasn’t said a word to me since prom. Then, suddenly, she lured me upstairs, and admittedly, I let it get a bit too snuggleacious. I felt like an old hoodie or box mac’n’cheese or something.”


“Better at 2am?” Buffy asked in confusion.


“I think he means like an old familiar comfort item,” Willow explained.


Xander nodded and indicated that it was correct.


“Plus.”


He paused, unsure.


“I mean, she had her own TV show. You really wouldn’t pass up the opportunity to make out with a TV star? I’m young, and some might say handsome, so why do I have to be so tied down? Anya is acting like we’re old and married. I mean, if there’s a beautiful girl with…no other thought but to please you…willing to do anything…”


He didn’t get an immediate response and sighed dramatically.


“Too many girls.”


His smile almost vanished for a second, turning somewhat wry and bitter. He stared into his beer.


“I miss Jesse. He would never be able to speak to her, but…”


He cleared his throat.


“He'd get it.”


Buffy put a comforting hand on Xander’s knee.


“I’m here for you, Xand. I’m Support-O-Gal.”


Willow rolled her eyes.


“What happened to powerfully, painfully in love?” she muttered.


A woman in red passed by, giving Xander the eye. He suddenly perked up again.


“Look, you want to do guilt-a-palooza, fine, but I’m done with that. Starting this minute, I’m gonna grab a hold of that crazy little thing called life and let it do its magical little heal-y thing.”


He took a long pull from his beer.


For a second, his smile slipped.


“What’s done is done. Let’s be in the moment. Behold the beauty that is now.”


His voice cracked slightly on the last word.


Nobody commented on it.


“Who’s with me?”


Willow watched him bounce his eyebrows and force a grin.


He looked like somebody trying to convince himself.


Buffy smiled.


“He’s actually making sense. We’re young and free in America. How dare we be spun by love or the lack of same?”


They clinked their beers.


Never had Willow felt so outside of her own friend group, even during The Great Separation Of Senior Year when they’d all distanced themselves from each other. Xander had barely even acknowledged her picture outside the Ghostbusters firehouse when she’d sent it, despite it being something they dreamed of as children. Not that long ago, he’d have called immediately. They’d have spent an hour arguing over whether Peter or Egon was cooler.


She still remembered when the three of them used to call each other over things that were stupid. Now she felt like she was reporting in from another planet.


She sat through one more drink, but when Xander and Buffy got up to dance with strangers, she played the ‘parent’ card, and they both seemed confused but accepting of her needing to go.


Watching Buffy and Xander sit shoulder to shoulder at the bar, laughing too loudly at jokes that weren’t funny, Willow felt unsettled. She knew she should have felt relieved that they were keeping each other company.


Instead, she felt strangely invisible.


She wasn’t even jealous. She had Tara waiting at home.


That almost made it worse.


She drove home, and the Maclay house was silent but for the dim hum of the television. She saw the three girls passed out with a near-empty popcorn bowl between them and scooted past to grab the remote and turn the TV off. She made sure each girl had a blanket around them and snuck upstairs quietly so as not to wake anyone.


Tara’s lamp was still on in her bedroom, and though she was lying in bed, she was awake.


“Hey, you,” Tara smiled, and Willow wasn’t sure she’d ever been happier to see it.


Willow kicked off her jeans without preamble, tossed her sweater over the desk chair, and slid under the sheet beside Tara.


“I have to brush my teeth, but I need a snuggle first.”


Tara lay on her side and arched an eyebrow.


“Sounds like your night was as…interesting…as mine.”


Willow winced.


“Anya must have been…a lot.”


“I managed to talk her out of hurting anybody physically,” Tara replied uneasily. “B-But I did help her change all his playlists to sea shanties.”


Willow’s eyes widened. Tara blushed.


“It was either that or she was going to try to trap a bunch of mosquitoes to let loose in his apartment. I-It seemed the lesser of two evils.”


Willow shook her head.


“Honestly, he deserves it. You know it’s bad when I actually feel sorry for Anya. He’s not exactly acting the reticent fool at the Bronze right now. He and Buffy must be 50% beer at this point.”


Tara leaned in and inhaled softly from Willow’s neck before placing a kiss there.


“You don’t smell of stinky yeast.”


“I was sipping on the Bronze’s best attempt at alcohol free beer,” Willow replied wryly. “I’m pretty sure they just mixed a bunch of dark colored liquids together and called it that. If I die in my sleep, avenge my death.”


Tara smiled and leaned in to kiss Willow’s lips.


“I’m glad you’re home.”


“Me too,” Willow replied as she felt her shoulders start to relax. “We already have a kid, I don’t want to parent my friends too.”


She glanced at Tara sidelong.


“Can I tell you something?”


“Anything,” Tara answered without hesitation. “Always.”


Willow pulled the sheet right up to her chest.


“I feel guilty.”


“Why?” Tara asked softly.


Willow met Tara’s eyes.


“Because my friends’ lives are all falling apart and mine is…great.”


Tara settled down beside Willow, taking her hand under the sheet.


“You work hard…we work hard…to make our life work. And we’ve been at a crossroads many times when we made decisions to do the work. We’re so lucky we have each other. But it didn’t just fall together. We work at it every day. And if they want something like that too, they’ll have to put the work in as well.”


She kept Willow’s gaze on the pillow.


“We’ll support them, of course, but you don’t have to feel guilty because we’ve made the choices we have. We’ll have downtimes in our lives, too. I’m sorry they’re going through it now. Are you including Buffy in that?”


Willow nodded solemnly.


“She’s definitely riding the depress-o train.”


“It must be so hard with her mom,” Tara replied sympathetically. “She’s taken on a heavy burden at a young age. She must feel like the only girl in all the world.”


Willow curled her body around Tara.


“I just want to go home with my w–” she cut herself off softly. “My Tara.”


Tara kissed the top of Willow’s head. Willow closed her eyes as her ear pressed against Tara’s chest.


“There it is. Now I’m here. Now I’m home.”


Tara gently stroked Willow’s hair.


“Mmm. This is a house arrest.”


“I gotta plead guilty,” Willow murmured happily.


She wasn’t planning on moving an inch.


Toothbrushing be damned.

---

Willow had never been gladder to see the highway.


Leaving Sunnydale felt like leaving a sinking ship, and she was darned if she wasn’t going to throw Sally and Tara on a raft and get out of dodge.


Jeff and Giles had agreed that Anya could stay in the makeshift apartment above the Magic Box while she worked out her next move, and when Willow had been saying goodbye to Buffy and Xander, both had just been feeling sorry for themselves. She promised she’d be in touch, and she meant it, but there seemed to be a slight thread of resentment for her ‘perfect’ relationship, and Willow thought she overheard Xander making a remark calling Tara a goodie two-shoes.


She didn’t catch it quick enough, but if he ever tried to say something like it again, he’d find out very quickly that Tara wasn’t a subject Willow was willing to be diplomatic about. She didn’t know what the heck had happened between her birthday and now for the vibe to change so completely, but she’d help as much as she could, from afar.


Her whole life existed within this car, and they would have to be her focus.


They were her lifeboat.


But she didn’t want to watch her friends capsize, either.


The worst part was that neither of them seemed to realize they were taking on water.


In the backseat, Sally and Az were playing slapsies, and Tara had her DJ table out, working out a setlist for her next show. Every so often, she’d ask for an opinion on some blending or a transition, and Willow saw her eyes dancing, knowing this was the part of it all she really enjoyed: just making the music.


“Love that, baby,” Willow complimented, glancing over just for a split second so she didn’t take her eyes off the road. “That bit where the same note ends the first song and starts the second? It made me feel like when I plug a USB in correctly the first time.”


Tara smiled.


“That is high praise indeed. And my biggest frustration as a DJ.”


Willow laughed and briefly squeezed Tara’s knee.


When they were coming into Los Angeles, Willow asked Azalea to call out her address to put in the GPS. It was in Fairfax, a street they passed often, and not one Willow associated with the more snobby student body of their school.


They parked up outside and popped the trunk to get Azalea’s luggage out.


The house was small, not as small as their apartment, where the walls were thin enough to hear the neighbors sneeze sometimes, but small, the way older houses tended to be, especially in LA.


Stucco flaked off near the porch steps, and the chain-link fence leaned just enough to suggest nobody had gotten around to fixing it in years, but the yard was well-maintained and had a small patch of poppies next to a garden swing.


They followed Az up the narrow walkway, and both Willow and Tara were surprised Juniper hadn’t flung open the door the moment the car pulled up. They shared a look that expressed this to each other as Az rang the doorbell and hung back in case they got caught up in an anxiety storm about to erupt.


The front door opened calmly, and for a second, Willow felt like everything slowed down.


“Oh my god,” she whispered, air leaving her lungs.


Tara’s mouth hung open slightly.


“Az’s mom is–”


“Totally hot!” Willow hissed, tensing her facial muscles to contain her reaction.


Juniper had completely transformed: from frizzy, frazzled hair to a straight, sleek look, wearing a bodycon mini dress that wasn’t inappropriate for an LA summer yet still felt like it should be worn to a cocktail party and enough make-up to seem like she was wearing none at all.


“Oh, Azalea, I missed you!”


She threw her arms around Az, who hugged back, seemingly oblivious to her mother’s transformation. Juniper squeezed her daughter tightly and looked up to Willow and Tara.


“Thank you for bringing her home. I’m sorry I doubted you.”


Willow and Tara exchanged a look.


“Uh, didn’t know you did,” Willow replied, swinging her hands together. “So, um, no sweat, I guess?”


“They were cool, Mom!” Azalea defended with a smile. “Willow can recite pi almost as long as I can.”


Willow was about to open her mouth to object when Tara nudged her gently not to get into a fighting match with a tween.


“Right, well, um, we’d better get home to unpack.”


Sally approached Azalea, and they played out a secret handshake, laughing at the end.


“See you soon!” Willow waved to Azalea, then looked back at Juniper. “And um, your haircut or, um, new clothes…they really suit you.”


Juniper put a hand against her heart.


“Oh, I’m married. To a man.”


Willow nodded a little too quickly and turned beet red.


“Yeah, we should go. Home. Our home. Where we live.”


Tara put a hand on Willow’s back to guide her away faster.


“Nice to see you again. Bye, Az.”


“Bye!” Az called out with a big wave.


They rushed back to the car, and Willow drove away as quickly as she could turn the ignition on.


“Why were you hitting on Az’s mom?” Sally asked in a bored tone.


Willow started spluttering.


“I was not! She, she changed! And I was just…I just wanted…NICE, okay, I was being NICE! I…”


“Az told me she always looks different when she and her Dad go away,” Sally replied, scratching her nails against the car seat.


“Oy, not delving into that one,” Willow muttered.


“Let’s just get home,” Tara agreed.


The apartment felt cozy and familiar when they got home after the past few days.


“Hey, Miss Kitty,” Willow greeted, bending down to make a pspsps sound.


Miss Kitty cracked an eye open from her bed and closed it again.


“Hey, Miss Kitty!” Sally stepped into the apartment, and Miss Kitty’s eyes flew open, and she darted over to Sally, weaving between her legs and purring as she jumped up onto Sally’s shoulder.


“Never forget who buys your treats,” Willow said, wounded.


Sally brought the cat over to her play area and started bouncing her mouse on a string.


Tara wheeled back their luggage and put it by the wall. Unpacking and laundry could wait an hour.


“Home sweet home,” she said as she kissed the top of Willow’s ear.


Her phone started beeping incessantly.


“Anya, I’m sure,” Tara said with a frown. “She’s always had an uncanny knack for knowing right when I have no excuse but to reply to her.”


“I have messages from Buffy and Xander, too,” Willow said, waving her phone from her pocket. “It’s basically a two-way conversation about how drunk to get tonight, like they’ve forgotten I’m in the group chat too.”


Tara sighed deeply.


“I don’t know how this is all going to play out.”


“Disaster,” Willow replied, shaking her head. “In absolute disaster.”

---

Less than a week after getting back from New York, and a few days since Willow and Tara had returned to LA and left Sunnydale and its residents to their devices, not much had changed.


So much so that Buffy felt like she’d never really come home.


Xander, being a willing drinking buddy, helped, but even in the quiet creep of night, she got her thrills by walking through the graveyard by herself, as if death herself was calling to her.


The quiet was suddenly disturbed as the hum of a motorcycle broke through the air. She looked around just in time to see a recognizable face ride up beside her. The man on the bike threw his leg off and picked a pack of cigarettes from his pocket, lighting one up.


“I told you I’d see you Saturday,” he said as he took a quiet drag. “Won’t kill you though. Some other things I’d like to do instead.”


“Spike,” Buffy said with wide eyes.


“Sorry it took me so long. This bloody country never ends,” Spike replied, kicking the tire of his bike. “Highway this, highway that. Bitta bloody greenery wouldn’t go amiss. Haven’t slept a wink since I left New York. Good thing I’m used to stayin’ up.”


Buffy’s heart was hammering.


“H-How did you find me?”


“I’ve got a good nose,” Spike replied casually, before whipping something out of his pocket with two fingers. “Forgot your license, didn’t you, Buffy? Can see why you went with Anne with a name like that. Had to ask around when I got here. Seems you’ve got a bit of a reputation around here. Everybody kept pointing me somewhere else.”


Buffy blinked.


“Oh.”


That meant she must have traveled home on her old fake ID, which, while it was a very good fake, didn’t say much for the TSA. Or her, as she'd been too hungover on the flight home to even realize.


She took it and put it in her back pocket.


“That’s all you’ve got to say when I’ve come all this way?” Spike asked, grinning devilishly.


Alarm bells started ringing in Buffy’s head. This was a man she’d met once, and yes, okay, had ‘gotten to know’, but now he rode from one end of the continent to the other for her?


“This is wrong. This is creepy. You are…beyond creepy.”


She tried to push away, but he grabbed her around the waist and pulled her close.


“I may be dirt, but you’re the one who likes to roll in it.”


Buffy felt dizzy.


Spike flicked his cigarette away and sat back on his bike.


“Come on, pet. I’ve got a spot we can go to.”


Every alarm bell in Buffy’s head was screaming.


And yet for some godforsaken reason, she got on the back of that bike anyway.

[TheBigPineapple99]

Dibs! Reading this at work, feel very bad for Buffy and Xander, and for Willow being caught in between them. Honestly I relate a lot to part of what Buffy and Xander are feeling here, and part of me doesn’t really blame them for how they’re acting, even if I do feel bad for the position it’s putting Willow in. In many ways they’re right, they’re young, Willow’s situation as a young parent is by far the more atypical for her age. I’m glad she’s settling in well, but I totally understand Buffy not feeling ready for the adult role she’s been put in and wanting some release, or even Xander not feeling as ready for the seriousness of his relationship. Thought obviously I can’t quite support all of their coping methods I think you’ve done a really good job of writing everyone do they have a very understandable position. And I didn’t think we’d see Spike again, perhaps naive of me. Kind of both excited and afraid to see where that goes. Thank you so much for continuing to share these stories with us!

[Will's redemption]

Hi Laragh, I'm overjoyed that you're continuing this story.
Sorry that I haven't commented since you've started writing again.

I'm happy that the "core family" of Willow, Tara and Sally is thriving and happy.
I also feel sorry for Buffy and Anya (Xander not so much, I can't understand that he let himself get lured by Cordelia after she regressed into a total bitca again! ).

From the epilogue of "Inevitable" I know that things will get much worse for Buffy before they get better. I'm wondering how much of the destructive relationship between her and Spike you are going to let uns readers witness from her perspective.

Alarm bells started ringing in Buffy’s head. This was a man she’d met once, and yes, okay, had ‘gotten to know’, but now he rode from one end of the continent to the other for her?


“This is wrong. This is creepy. You are…beyond creepy.”

An optimist might call Spike's move romantic - but I fear it wasn't motivated by "love at first sight" but darker intentions (a desire to "own" or "control" Buffy, maybe?)

Willow curled her body around Tara.


“I just want to go home with my w–” she cut herself off softly. “My Tara.”


Tara kissed the top of Willow’s head. Willow closed her eyes as her ear pressed against Tara’s chest.


“There it is. Now I’m here. Now I’m home.”

Awww to Willow almost calling Tara her wife!
I'm really hoping they're going to get engaged soon and that in this fic Tara will be the one to propose.

[Laragh]

TheBigPineapple99 —

Dibs! Reading this at work, feel very bad for Buffy and Xander, and for Willow being caught in between them. Honestly I relate a lot to part of what Buffy and Xander are feeling here, and part of me doesn’t really blame them for how they’re acting, even if I do feel bad for the position it’s putting Willow in. In many ways they’re right, they’re young, Willow’s situation as a young parent is by far the more atypical for her age. I’m glad she’s settling in well, but I totally understand Buffy not feeling ready for the adult role she’s been put in and wanting some release, or even Xander not feeling as ready for the seriousness of his relationship. Thought obviously I can’t quite support all of their coping methods I think you’ve done a really good job of writing everyone do they have a very understandable position.

I sympathize with them muchly! They are young and learning about heartbreak and dealing with complicated family situations and not much money. Willow and Tara are in a very different, some would even say privileged situation and had it not been somewhat similar to what they ended up doing at the same age on the show (minus the job situation) it probably would have been a lot to make people believe they could raise a young teen! I honestly think Buffy and Xander are acting totally age appropriately, it’s just such a stark contrast to how Willow is living her life that the divide feels bigger.

And I didn’t think we’d see Spike again, perhaps naive of me. Kind of both excited and afraid to see where that goes. Thank you so much for continuing to share these stories with us!

He is established as having been a ‘thing’ from the epilogue of Inevitable, so I kind of had to weave him in somehow. I will say I’m not a Spuffy shipper though, so anyone hoping for that is probably best off avoiding”

Thanks so much for your feedback

Will's redemption —

Hi Laragh, I'm overjoyed that you're continuing this story.
Sorry that I haven't commented since you've started writing again.

Hi!!!

I'm happy that the "core family" of Willow, Tara and Sally is thriving and happy.
I also feel sorry for Buffy and Anya (Xander not so much, I can't understand that he let himself get lured by Cordelia after she regressed into a total bitca again! ).

I feel like like most things in life, growth isn't always linear. Cordelia is hitting the rejection of her show hard so what better way to get validation than coming home to where she was Queen C? She will ride that wave throughout the years, though she won't feature much to see it. There is however A Plan with her!

From the epilogue of "Inevitable" I know that things will get much worse for Buffy before they get better. I'm wondering how much of the destructive relationship between her and Spike you are going to let uns readers witness from her perspective.

Truly witnesss? Very little.

An optimist might call Spike's move romantic - but I fear it wasn't motivated by "love at first sight" but darker intentions (a desire to "own" or "control" Buffy, maybe?)

Being enthralled.

Awww to Willow almost calling Tara her wife!
I'm really hoping they're going to get engaged soon and that in this fic Tara will be the one to propose.

All I'll say is...trust me!

Thanks so much for your feedback, glad to see you back!

---

Update Directly Below

[Laragh]

---

A Blessing

---

'Cause You Can Hear In The Silence
You Can Feel It On The Way Home
You Can See It With The Lights Out
You Are In Love, True Love
You Are In Love

Time passed as time does.


Anya moved into the magic box permanently, paying rent by doing extra hours as a procurement manager, giving Jeff more time to focus on expanding evening classes.


Apparently, this just involved ‘browsing eBay while watching Housewives’, as Anya put it, but it gave her something else to do instead of thinking about Xander, who was feeling the effects of Anya’s pain through all of the petty revenge ideas she’d come up with when carrying out her ‘vengeance business’.


More than one glitter bomb had arrived for him in the mail, though Xander was doing himself a much bigger disservice with his continuous drinking, mimicking his father just a little too closely.


Buffy, on the other hand, had gone to ground. Working a lot, apparently, especially night shifts. She would text back, hours or even days later, but never said more than a few words.


While Willow and Tara cared for and were doing their best to be available to their friends for a vent or cry session, it was also all systems go in their lives.


School started up again, and they were back in the routine of classes, work, and home. Sally and Azalea were the ‘cool kids’ of the advanced placement program they were in, having gone to New York for the summer, and while Az was lapping it up, Sally was happy to hang out with Aaron at lunch and let her make the most of it.


The school had offered to put Sally in an accelerated math program on the back of their triumph, but she’d decided to let Az be Queen Bee in that department while she stayed in some gifted classes and returned to mainstream in others. The math camp had given her the confidence to learn how she wanted, and the school gave her the freedom to structure it how she wanted.


By the end of September, they were in the swing of things, had worked out their new schedules, and settled into their new classes, but it was a stark contrast to the freedom of the summer when Willow and Tara had pretty much seen each other whenever they wanted.


“Dinner was delicious,” Tara said as she gently bumped Willow’s shoulder as they did the dishes side-by-side. “That lemon garlic chicken is my favorite thing you make.”


“Improvement from the days of Pop-Tarts for every meal, huh?” Willow asked as she wiped a dishcloth over a plate. “I may have, ah, been buttering you up a little bit.”


“Oh?” Tara asked with an arched eyebrow. “What do I need to be buttered up for?”


“Uh, well, see, I kinda won’t be here on Wednesday?” Willow replied, desperately trying to stop her voice from going up an octave. “I have, um, a class. A project. A mandatory attendance project that I have to physically attend in person.”


She paused, purposefully turning away from Tara under the guise of stacking the plates.


“I should be back by the time Sally’s home from school, but…”


“You need me to be here,” Tara finished.


Willow’s head bobbed in a nod.


“You can take your Consumer Psychology class online, right? I mean, that’s…that’s the easiest one to take online?”


She'd scoured Tara's schedule carefully, trying to figure that out.


Tara nodded too.


“I was, um, gonna go to the studio, but I can reschedule.”


Willow took a wet glass and continued to dry it.


“You’ve been studio gal night and day lately.”


“Well, it’s good to be prepared,” Tara replied, rinsing a spoon a little too hard, and some water splashed on her.


Willow delicately patted the wet spot on Tara’s collarbone.


“You must be working on something good.”


Tara’s eyes were downcast.


“It’s hard to know when it’s perfect.”


“Does it have to be?” Willow asked softly.


Tara exhaled slowly.


“This one? Yeah.”


Willow frowned slightly but tried to turn it into a smile.


“So, um, Wednesday? Can you come home early just in case? I could even just stay in touch, so you only have to come home if you need to? If traffic’s okay, you might not need to at all…”


“Of course it’s fine. You need to go to your project,” Tara replied as she handed off the last utensil. “What’s the project on anyway?”


Willow’s eyes widened, and she struggled to neutralize her face before she turned back.


“I'm helping benchmark a distributed neural-network optimization framework,” she rattled off too quickly.


She bit down on her inner lip for a moment to stop the shake in her voice.


“The backend uses parallelized tensor virtualization for real-time semantic calibration,” she continued with the undue confidence of every fraudster in the Hulu documentaries she'd watched.


Tara just laughed.


“Okay, honey. Well, I hope some of those words are interesting enough to keep you occupied.”


“Oh, I’ll be very occupied,” Willow promised weakly before hanging the cloth on the sink.

---

“You got your lunch?” Willow asked as Sally shoved some papers into her backpack. “And your social studies paper?”


“Blah blah industrial revolution, blah blah, kids worked in mines, blah blah labor reforms,” Sally recited in a bored tone. “You know, under the California Labor Code, minors can’t work until they’re 14 years old.”


“So?” Willow asked with an arched eyebrow.


“So you should consider that next time you ask me to empty the dishwasher,” Sally replied as she stuck out her tongue. “Hey, can I have an extra pudding cup?”


Willow’s eyes narrowed slightly.


“Because you’re hungry or because you’re using it as some kind of playground currency?”


Sally threw her backpack on her back indignantly.


“God forbid a girl diversify her assets.”


There was a knock at the door just as Tara came out of the bathroom, tying her hair up.


“Are we expecting someone this early?”


“It’s just Aaron,” Sally said as she made her way over to the door. “His Dads are finally letting him walk to school alone.”


She opened the door and waved to Aaron on the other side.


“Hi!” she said, looking over her shoulder momentarily. “Bye!”


The door slammed before either Willow or Tara had a chance to return the goodbye.


“Counting down the days to 13…” Tara muttered as she went to the kitchen to pour some coffee.


“At least she said bye,” Willow replied as she took the keys to the Vespa from their hook.


“Do you want to take the car?” Tara offered as she held her mug in both hands.


“Don’t you need it?” Willow asked with a frown.


Tara shook her head.


“No, I wanted to make sure you didn’t feel under pressure, so I arranged all my classes from home today.”


Willow’s heart swelled.


Which, unfortunately, made lying to Tara feel approximately one thousand times worse.


“Great. That’ll save my butt some cramping.”


“Oh, so I won’t have to massage it later,” Tara said with a crooked grin just peeking out above her mug.


Willow nearly dropped the keys.


“On second thought, I should definitely take Velma. She’s probably been feeling neglected lately.”


“What if I promise Roxy a little rub anyway?” Tara asked with a sly wink as she went to refresh her mug. “Do you want some coffee for the road?”


Willow shook her head.


“Already jittering at near-visible frequencies.”


“Oh, honey,” Tara said as she put her mug down and came over to hold Willow by the shoulders. “I’m sure you’ll do great on your project.”


She caught Willow’s face in her hands and looked her square in the eyes.


“You are amazing. You’re going to do great. And you look particularly well-polished today.”


She leaned in and pressed a tender kiss on Willow’s lips.


“I love you no matter how it goes.”


Willow’s shoulders relaxed momentarily, and she rested her forehead on Tara’s.


“I love you so much.”


Tara kissed the bridge of Willow’s nose and then lightly slapped her butt.


“Go on. You don’t want to be late.”


Willow turned quickly.


“Okay. Going now. Um, I’ll keep in touch.”


“Good luck, honey,” Tara called after her as Willow switched keys and headed out to the car.


She sat behind the wheel for a second, took a deep breath, then turned the ignition and pulled out of the parking spot.


Then, instead of heading east for campus, she headed north toward Sunnydale.

---

Willow was just approaching Maple Court, trying to decide whether a decaf mocha would calm her nerves or simply give her a cream-based delivery system to roll around her anxious stomach, when she spotted Anya marching across the street toward the Magic Box and then Xander following after her, seemingly pleading with her.


Shit, shit, shit


As guilty as it made her feel, she couldn’t risk seeing any of her friends today. Whether inadvertently or not, they'd reveal it to Tara, and then she would be screwed.


She made a quick turn onto State Street, forgoing any idea of sugaring up, and barreled straight toward the street she grew up on.


She'd deliberately planned this for the weekend her parents were away, using their driveway to park beneath the garage awning to look less conspicuous. Kimberly should be on day two of her off days, meaning she’d be both awake and rested and hopefully in a prime mood for the conversation Willow wanted to have.


She rushed across the street and hesitated at the door to the Maclay house, smoothing her shirt and fixing her jacket.


She lifted her hand to knock, but it faltered and fell by her side again. Mentally kicking herself in the ass, she quickly lifted it again and made contact this time, knocking three times.


A few moments later, Kimberly answered the door and had a moment of surprise.


“Oh, Willow. What are–”


She paused, looking past Willow.


“Where is Tara? And Sally?” she asked, her voice rising with alarm. “What’s happened, what’s going on?”


“No, no,” Willow shook her head vigorously and waved her hands in front of her. “No, nothing, nothing bad! Nothing’s wrong!”


This couldn’t have gotten off to a better start. She deflated on the spot.


“Can I come in?”


Kimberly blinked once, then stood aside to let Willow in.


Willow walked in, fidgeting with her hands, until she felt Kimberly’s warm, maternal hand on the small of her back, guiding her into the kitchen.


Kimberly silently busied herself making tea and brought two clear cups with a slice of lemon and a fresh sprig of mint in them.


“Lemon balm tea. Calming. Take a sip.”


Willow obeyed, closing her eyes while the warm liquid moved down her throat.


Kimberly waited until Willow’s hands stopped shaking to speak.


“Now. Tell me what on earth is going on.”


Willow knew what she wanted to say.


She had practiced it over and over, for days – weeks – now. She’d done it a hundred times in the car ride up alone.


But now, no words came.


Just blankness.


She sipped the tea in heavy glugs, the hot liquid burning her throat as she willed her words to return to her.


Why was this the one time in her entire life she couldn’t just start babbling?


When her empty cup made a hollow sound against the table, she held up a hand to indicate she needed a minute.


“Take your time, sweetheart.”


Willow suddenly felt like she was swallowed by dread. Not in a very long time had she felt this useless, and she realized quickly she wasn’t going to let herself either.


“Nope. No. Not screwing this up.”


She stood up, marched out the front door, slapped her cheek twice, then turned around and knocked again, louder this time.


Kimberly again opened the door, trying her hardest not to look alarmed.


But this time, Willow stood confidently and reassuringly.


“Hello, Ms. Maclay. I’d like to speak to you about your daughter.”


“I see,” Kimberly replied, holding back a smile. “Well then, you'd better come in.”


Willow walked right in and pivoted to the living room this time. They sat together on the couch, and Willow made sure her posture was straight. She met Kimberly’s eyes.


“I have loved Tara since I was four years old.”


Her voice caught, but she cleared her throat and continued.


“She is everything I need that I never knew I wanted,” she said, making sure she didn’t break their gaze. “She is everything I want that I never knew I needed.”


Kimberly’s eyes started to crease as she realized what was happening.


“We’ve gone through more than a lot of people our age, and it’s come to a point where I want her and the whole world to know that this is forever,” Willow said, desperately poking her tongue out to wet her lips and allow herself to continue. “So I’m asking for your blessing. Not your permission, because Tara doesn’t belong to anybody and she never will.”


Willow gave one small, resolute nod.


But I’ll be hers forever.


Willow held Kimberly's gaze another moment, wanting the sincerity behind those words to be unmistakable, before finally letting herself soften again.


“I am asking your blessing to ask your daughter to marry me.”


Her hands were tight in her lap, nails digging into her palms, and her jaw tensed, but she kept eye contact and made sure it was known that she was entirely serious.


Instead of an expected reaction, which Willow foresaw going two ways – a giant hug or frantic discouragement – Kimberly just stood, turned, and quietly walked out of the room.


Willow watched the door for a moment, blinking.


What the hell was that?


Was she supposed to follow?


See herself out?


She looked around like a camera crew or something might jump out and tell her it was all a prank, but not even a car drove by outside.


Just as Willow was contemplating curling up into a ball and pretending the world didn’t exist, she heard footsteps on the stairs, and Kimberly reappeared.


Willow stood respectfully, but Kimberly had her sit again and transferred something from her hands into Willow’s.


Willow looked down and gasped slightly upon seeing a classic black velvet ring box. Two shaking thumbs eased it open, and inside was a delicate yellow gold band with a striking oval-cut ruby at its center, held in a four-prong setting. On either side of the center stone were three small round diamonds clustered together, balancing it, and tiny gold bead prongs separated and secured the accent stones, highlighting its vintage design.


“This is Tara’s grandmother’s ring,” Willow breathed, almost afraid to touch it. “I remember us playing with it. It was one of the only times I can remember you getting mad at us.”


“It's spent more time in my dresser than on anyone's hand,” Kimberly admitted. “It always felt like it was waiting. My mother always said that some jewellery chooses its owner. This one chose Tara a very long time ago.”


She turned her head with gentle recollection.


“Tara used to put this on every time she played dress-up,” she continued softly. “Then she’d announce she was marrying you. So you could say, Willow, this visit hasn't exactly come out of nowhere.”


She paused for a moment.


“Do you already have one?”


Willow looked back down at the ring. She could only shake her head.


“Every ring I looked at felt wrong somehow. I could never find the perfect one. I was hoping once I’d done this, it would force my brain into making a decision.”


Willow couldn't even meet Kimberly’s eyes for a moment. With tears pricking at the corners, she looked up.


“Does this mean…?”


Kimberly covered Willow’s hands with her own.


“Yes, you have my blessing,” she said, emotion and laughter both cracking in her voice. “I knew everything I needed to know about you the day you stood in that courtroom for Sally and took my daughter's hand without even hesitating. I know you will treat her how she deserves to be treated.”


Willow threw her arms around Kimberly, and they both started blubbering. Kimberly leaned over to the coffee table to pluck two tissues out of a box and handed one over.


“Are you sure about the ring?” Willow asked as she ran the tissue under her nose.


Kimberly nodded.


“It would have been hers anyway. She might as well have it now. And I like to think you both picked it out that day you were six.”


Willow just stared down at the ring.


“It’s going to look so beautiful on her,” she whispered, then tucked some hair behind her ear shyly. “If she says yes.”


Kimberly brought her hands down on her own thighs.


“Tell me everything. When, where, how? And where does Tara think you are today?”


“I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know,” Willow answered honestly. “And doing a project. I hope she doesn’t look up any of the words I said I was doing my project on, because it was complete gibberish. I can’t lie to her.”


“That’s a good thing,” Kimberly impressed on Willow with a firm gaze. “I want you to remember that your whole life.”


Willow nodded, understanding.


“I was thinking her birthday?” she said, uncertainty in her voice. “And I dunno why but…something pulls me here. To Sunnydale. It has, like, our roots. I feel like we should lay this new one here too.”


Kimberly dabbed beneath her eyes with the tissue and then suddenly straightened.


“Oh, wait.”


Willow’s eyes widened, and her heart started to pound.


“W-What?”


Kimberly adopted a slightly pleading look.


“You’re not…going to do the ring in a dessert thing, are you? This ring will not look anywhere near as good buried in a crème brûlée.”


Willow recoiled slightly and tried to shake her head indignantly.


“I wasn’t gonna!”


Kimberly raised an eyebrow.


“But you were thinking about it.”


Willow started a small pout.


“I was considering options!” she defended her unexpressed thoughts, then slightly deflated. “Of which Sunnydale has very few. Apart from some seasonal attractions…”


Kimberly narrowed her eyes knowingly.


“You were thinking about the carnival, weren’t you?”


Willow’s silence answered for her.


“Oh, honey, no.”


Willow laughed helplessly despite herself. Sometimes Tara and her mom were so alike.


“What’s wrong with the carnival?”


“There’s nothing wrong with the carnival,” Kimberly replied sagely. “But Tara doesn’t want to be full of greasy dough foods or having been throttled around a ride when she’s proposed to.”


That was, infuriatingly, true.


“What about somewhere by the beach?” Kimberly asked.


Willow’s eyes widened, and she immediately shook her head.


“Us and beaches have a, um…complicated history.”


Thankfully, Kimberly didn’t probe.


“She likes thoughtful things,” Kimberly continued gently. “Private things. Meaningful things. You know her, Willow. Think about her, not the event itself.”


Willow slumped back slightly.


“That’s the problem,” she admitted. “It feels too important, and everything feels not enough.”


Kimberly softened instantly.


“Tell me your ideas.”


Willow groaned and covered her face.


“You’re gonna judge me.”


“I raised Donny. I've had plenty of practice in judging silently,” Kimberly replied with a requisite Maclay crooked grin.


Willow snorted loudly, surprising herself.


Then, slowly, she lowered her hands.


“I wanted to spell out Marry Me with candles.”


Kimberly tilted her head uncertainly.


“Where?”


“Well, I’m guessing there’s some kind of lighting-candles-in-public permit needed for such things, so maybe…here?” Willow asked hopefully.


“Here?” Kimberly asked, looking around them.


“In the backyard,” Willow explained, her knees knocking together slightly. “We played so much out there growing up.”


“Oh,” Kimberly said softly, immediately understanding.


Willow stared down at her hands.


“We used to hide from Donny in the bushes,” she admitted quietly. “Sometimes we wouldn’t even talk. We’d just…sit.”


Kimberly's face softened.


“That’s not a bad choice.”


“But then I thought maybe it’s too sad?” Willow continued quickly. “Like, hey, honey, remember all our trauma? Wanna legally bind yourself to me forever?”


Kimberly burst out laughing.


Willow smiled despite herself.


“See? Bad.”


“No, sweetheart,” Kimberly corrected warmly. “That’s history. There’s a difference.”


Willow fell quiet at that.


History, not trauma. Somehow, those felt different coming from Tara’s mother. Her therapist would have a field day with that revelation.


“What else?” Kimberly prompted.


Willow sighed dramatically.


“Well, I guess the French restaurant is out.”


“Mhm,” Kimberly agreed with a nod.


“Mr. Smith’s Pizza was pretty special for us. We had it every Friday night,” Willow continued.


“Mhm,” Kimberly replied again, though less enthused this time.


Willow gnawed on her lip.


“The park near downtown. When our old park got mowed down for a parking lot, that became where we went to just be the two of us.”


Kimberly’s eyebrows rose slightly.


“The one with the lake?”


Willow looked away.


“That’s where she kissed me…not for the first time. That’s all very complicated. But the first time I knew I loved her. Where I was able to accept that I loved her. Or a tiny bit of me, anyway, though it took me too long to tell her.”


Kimberly immediately pressed a hand to her chest.


“Oh, that’s dangerous.”


“Dangerous?” Willow asked, unsurely.


“For me emotionally,” Kimberly clarified, swiping at her eyes. “I’m already crying.”


Willow laughed again, softer this time.


Then her expression slowly dimmed.


“What if she says no?”


Kimberly’s face changed instantly, but not with offense or dismissiveness or even criticism. Just a deeply certain look in her eyes that only a mother could have.


“She won’t.”


Willow felt that too, but she was nothing if not an expert in self-doubt.


“But what if she does?”


Kimberly reached across and took Willow’s hand again.


“Then she’ll still love you,” she said simply. “But Willow? That girl has loved you with her entire soul since before she was even old enough to know what love was.”


Willow had to press her lips together to stop them from trembling.


“And between you and me,” Kimberly added in a conspiratorial whisper. “She’s significantly less subtle about it than she thinks she is.”


Willow laughed through tears.


“She really thinks she’s smooth sometimes. Like, I don’t notice her checking me out.”


“She gets that from me,” Kimberly grinned. “I was so obvious about it, I ended up pregnant at 15.”


Willow laughed so hard she had to wipe beneath her eyes again.


The warmth settled around them naturally after that, easy and familiar.


Family, Willow realized.


And suddenly she could picture it all so clearly that it almost hurt.


Not just the proposal, but all that came after.


Tara asleep beside her for the rest of her life.


Sally still stealing food out of their fridge at sixteen. Twenty. Thirty.


Arguments over the paint colors of nurseries.


Chrisyulenukkah.


Wrinkles.


Grey hair.


Little old ladyhood.


An extraordinary life shared in ordinary moments, just like their walk through Manhattan.


The one Willow had planned, and Tara had loved.


The thought rooted itself so deeply in Willow’s chest that it nearly stole the breath from her lungs. Kimberly must have seen it happen on her face because her own expression softened immediately.


“There it is,” she said quietly.


Willow frowned slightly.


“What?”


Kimberly had a look of pride and awe.


“That look.”


“What look?” Willow asked, self-consciously touching her face.


Kimberly squeezed her hand.


“The one that says you already know her answer.”


Willow swallowed hard.


Yeah.


Maybe she did.


Kimberly squeezed Willow’s hands.


“If I can do anything to help,” she offered sincerely, then her hands flew to her mouth. “My baby is getting married!”


“You are still wildly overestimating my chances here,” Willow said weakly, but Kimberly just waved a dismissive hand before Willow spoke again. “And you have to keep it a secret. From everyone.”


Kimberly made a cross symbol across her heart.


Willow closed the ring box and put it in her inside pocket.


“I swear I’ll keep it safe until it’s hers again.”


They stood and hugged, and Kimberly cupped Willow’s face.


“You’ve always been family. I’m so happy you’re making it official.”


Willow swallowed deeply and said goodbye before she started crying.


Willow stepped back out into the cool afternoon air in a daze.


The door clicked shut behind her, but she stayed on the porch for a moment, one hand pressed against the inside pocket of her jacket like she needed to physically reassure herself that the ring was still there.


It was real. Everything about it suddenly felt terrifyingly real.


Not hypothetical, or ‘someday’, or a sleepy murmur whispered into Tara’s hair while she slept.


Marry me?


It had happened more than once in the past few weeks, when she lay awake pondering the biggest question of her life. Like practice. If she could say it enough times to Tara while she slept, she might be able to do it awake.


She hurried down the porch steps before she could start crying again and slid into the driver’s seat of the car, shutting the door with a shaky exhale.


For a long moment, she just sat there.


Then she pulled the ring box back out, carefully this time.


Reverently, really.


The ruby caught the afternoon sunlight spilling through the windshield, throwing tiny, fractured red reflections across her fingers.


Willow smiled helplessly.


“Oh, she’s gonna love you,” she whispered.


Her eyes burned almost immediately.


Because now the proposal danced in her mind like a little movie playing a memory that hadn't happened yet.


Tara laughing in disbelief.


Tara crying.


Tara covering her mouth with both hands.


Tara saying yes.


Willow's throat tightened violently.


Before she could fully lose composure, Willow snapped the box shut again and pressed it tightly to her chest.


Then, after one steadying breath, she reached for her phone.


Three missed texts.


From Tara, of course.





The second, twenty minutes later:





And the third:





Willow stared at the screen so long that it blurred. She let out one breath that was almost a laugh and typed back:

Never had four words conveyed so much.


She put the car into reverse with trembling hands.


And for the first time since she’d started planning all of this, Willow Rosenberg let herself believe Tara might actually become her wife.

[Will's redemption]

Dibs!

I'm really happy about Willow's resolve to propose to Tara and her decision to ask for Kimberly's blessing first.

So cute how she just "restarted" the whole visit once she remembered what she planned to say, and what a lovely declaration ist was:.

“I have loved Tara since I was four years old.”


Her voice caught, but she cleared her throat and continued.


“She is everything I need that I never knew I wanted,” she said, making sure she didn’t break their gaze. “She is everything I want that I never knew I needed.”


Kimberly’s eyes started to crease as she realized what was happening.


“We’ve gone through more than a lot of people our age, and it’s come to a point where I want her and the whole world to know that this is forever,” Willow said, desperately poking her tongue out to wet her lips and allow herself to continue. “So I’m asking for your blessing. Not your permission, because Tara doesn’t belong to anybody and she never will.”


Willow gave one small, resolute nod.


But I’ll be hers forever.


Willow held Kimberly's gaze another moment, wanting the sincerity behind those words to be unmistakable, before finally letting herself soften again.


“I am asking your blessing to ask your daughter to marry me.”

I wasn't impressed by Kimberly just walking out of the room and leaving Willow in doubt (she could have said something like "Oh sweetie, of course you have my blessing, will you excuse me for just a minute?") That aside I loved that Kimberly gave Willow her mother's ring to use as the engagement ring and how she helped Willow develop her plan for the proposal and overcome her fear that Tara might refuse her.

They stood and hugged, and Kimberly cupped Willow’s face.


“You’ve always been family. I’m so happy you’re making it official.”


Willow swallowed deeply and said goodbye before she started crying.

I always felt that Kimberly loved Willow and treated her like a second daughter, so I'm not surprised she accepts her as her daughter in law.

For a long moment, she just sat there.


Then she pulled the ring box back out, carefully this time.


Reverently, really.


The ruby caught the afternoon sunlight spilling through the windshield, throwing tiny, fractured red reflections across her fingers.


Willow smiled helplessly.


“Oh, she’s gonna love you,” she whispered.


Her eyes burned almost immediately.


Because now the proposal danced in her mind like a little movie playing a memory that hadn't happened yet.


Tara laughing in disbelief.


Tara crying.


Tara covering her mouth with both hands.


Tara saying yes.


Willow's throat tightened violently.


Before she could fully lose composure, Willow snapped the box shut again and pressed it tightly to her chest.

AWWWW! I'm looking forward to the proposal!

Maybe I'm wrong, but I have a hunch it might turn out as a mutual proposal, considering this part of the conversation between Tara and Willow:

“You must be working on something good.”


Tara’s eyes were downcast.


“It’s hard to know when it’s perfect.”


“Does it have to be?” Willow asked softly.


Tara exhaled slowly.


“This one? Yeah.”

I immediately thought that this "project" that has to be perfect might be Tara's own plan for a marriage proposal. If so, I'm wondering if Tara will go to Ira (and Sheila?) to ask for his / their blessing too.

[Laragh]

Will's redemption —

Dibs!

I'm really happy about Willow's resolve to propose to Tara and her decision to ask for Kimberly's blessing first.

So cute how she just "restarted" the whole visit once she remembered what she planned to say, and what a lovely declaration ist was

Willow has grown so much over the last few years, I thought it was important for her to do this 'right'.

I wasn't impressed by Kimberly just walking out of the room and leaving Willow in doubt (she could have said something like "Oh sweetie, of course you have my blessing, will you excuse me for just a minute?") That aside I loved that Kimberly gave Willow her mother's ring to use as the engagement ring and how she helped Willow develop her plan for the proposal and overcome her fear that Tara might refuse her.

But that would have ruined the comedy

I always felt that Kimberly loved Willow and treated her like a second daughter, so I'm not surprised she accepts her as her daughter in law.

She has, Willow's parents made sure of that!

AWWWW! I'm looking forward to the proposal!

Maybe I'm wrong, but I have a hunch it might turn out as a mutual proposal, considering this part of the conversation between Tara and Willow:

I immediately thought that this "project" that has to be perfect might be Tara's own plan for a marriage proposal. If so, I'm wondering if Tara will go to Ira (and Sheila?) to ask for his / their blessing too.

*opens and closes mouth* you will have to read and see!

Thank you so much for your feedback!

---

Update Directly Below

[Laragh]

---

The Best Laid Plans

---

Why Am I Feelin’ So Nervous When
Things Are Goin’ So Perfect?
Yeah But I Know That It’s Worth It To
Spend Forever With You

Willow snuck her head around her bedroom door and looked into the living area.


“Sally?” she whispered as if they weren’t the only two in the apartment. “C’mere.”


Sally didn’t look away from where she was sitting on the couch, doodling in her D&D notebook.


“No.”


Willow pouted.


“Please?”


Sally turned so her back was more to Willow and drew on her knees.


“No, you’re being weird.”


“Aren’t I always weird?” Willow asked.


“Which makes this phenomenally weird,” Sally intoned in a bored tone.


“Nice vocab,” Willow replied, then gnawed lightly on her lip. “I need to show you something.”


Sally looked over her shoulder with her eyes slightly bulging.


“For the last time, I KNOW you held a koala, and I don’t care! I got a selfie with a red panda! We’ve all seen exotic bears, Willow!”


Willow bounced with frustration and took a long, conspiring look around before hurrying over to sit beside Sally.


Sally gave her a deeply pained look until Willow presented something between them. Sally looked down and saw an open ring box with a vibrant red stone shining out. Willow beamed from ear to ear.


“I’m gonna ask your sister to marry me.”


Sally stared.


And stared and stared.


Just as Willow was trying desperately not to snap the box closed and go throw up, Sally looked up with the biggest smile Willow had ever seen on her face.


“That is disgusting,” she said, unexpectedly throwing her arms around Willow. “She’s going to be so happy.”


Willow was stunned, and it took her a moment to return the hug.


“You think?”


Sally’s head bobbed excitedly.


“Yeah, she’s frickin’ nuts because who’d wanna marry you, but yeah.”


It was said with such glee that Willow barely registered the insult.


“No one knows except Tara’s mom. You have to keep it a secret, okay? But I need your help.”


Sally put her hand forward.


“I’m in.”


Willow put her hand on top and smiled.


It was on.

---

Operation ‘Mrs. Dorks’, as Sally had lovingly dubbed it, was all going according to plan.


They were going to Sunnydale for Tara’s birthday, so they would have ‘babysitters’ and Willow could carry out a traditional birthday surprise.


Tara just had no idea how much of a surprise she was in for.


Kimberly had been right that the French restaurant was too cliché and Mr. Smith’s Pizza was way too casual, so she’d picked one of the few other options and made reservations at Ruby’s, which was at least the best happy-medium restaurant you could get in Sunnydale.


Ruby’s occupied the comfortable middle ground between casual and upscale. The ruby-red neon sign outside had one perpetually flickering letter that nobody seemed interested in fixing. Inside were deep burgundy booths, little glass table lamps, and framed photographs of old Hollywood that shared wall space with Sunnydale High football memorabilia. It wasn’t fashionable enough to intimidate anyone, nor casual enough to feel ordinary.


Just warm, safe, reliable.


It was exactly the kind of place you could take someone for their birthday and make them feel special without immediately making them suspect a ring was hidden in the dessert. The mood would stay warm and comfortable instead of indicating the grand romantic gesture that was coming.


And that was exactly the vibe Willow wanted.


Not that she was doing the ring in the dessert, though. Kimberly had already warned her off, but Willow wasn’t keen anyway. Too hackneyed, but also too many risks.


Sending the dessert to the wrong person, losing the ring in the process, or worse, accidental swallowing.


Willow was nervous enough without imagining doing the Heimlich maneuver in the middle of her proposal.


This was where her Maclay girls came in, and she fully considered Sally a Maclay, regardless of what any birth certificate happened to say. While they strolled home and Willow waxed lyrical about all the ways she loved Tara, Kimberly and Sally would be setting up the candles in the backyard.


Willow had already ordered the Extra Flamey ones.


Enough to spell out ‘Marry Me?’ inside a heart, words Willow would time perfectly with their arrival.


Sunset was at 6:22 PM, and civil twilight would end at 6:47 PM, giving Willow a 25-minute window to arrive and get down on one knee in the best lighting conditions. Five o’clock wasn’t exactly prime dining time, but prime dining wasn’t the point.


She’d timed everything.


Twelve-minute walk home if Tara stopped to admire flowers.


Nine if she didn’t.


Sally and Kimberly needed fifteen minutes to light the candles. There had been practice runs. There was a contingency for wind. Even ‘Ruby’s’ was a subtle nod to what kind of ring Tara was about to have on her finger.


Willow had the ring; she had a plan. Now all she needed was that last bit of moxie to give her the confidence to do it.


Her fingers tapped the steering wheel somewhere between Summerland and Montecito as Sally blew their ears out with her command of the playlist. Every so often, her phone would ping with a new message, and she’d frown.


She was aware of how utterly selfish she sounded when she thought it, but could her friends have picked a better time for their lives to implode?


It was either Xander cycling through despair at throwing his relationship away or disingenuous pep at going out to play the field. Buffy seemed to be gung-ho about being his wingman, and Willow received many drunken videos to prove it. And though 2am was when Xander became his most misanthropic self, Buffy went radio silent until the next day, when her messages would turn into self-recrimination or reproach of her actions the night before.


It filled Willow with so much guilt and regret, the last two things she needed while planning one of the most magical days of her life.


It was true she’d kind of been the glue that kept their little trio together, and though Buffy and Xander clearly had their own friendship now, they didn’t seem to be the best influence on each other. Maybe they needed Willow’s reliable dog-geyser-person self to keep them all on track.


She’d up and left for her own selfish love, and now two of the people she loved most were falling apart.


How was she supposed to celebrate while that was happening?


All of this turmoil had, of course, not gone unnoticed by Tara. Willow was physically present but emotionally elsewhere, and Tara had somewhat felt she had half a girlfriend for the past few weeks.


Even in the car ride alone, Willow had forgotten what Tara had said twice, glanced at the notifications lighting the screen more than usual, even when it was dubiously safe, and had this awful glint of guilt in her eye that Tara hadn’t seen since high school.


When she saw new messages show up again, accompanied this time with a definitive brow furrow, Tara reached across the car and tucked some hair behind Willow’s ear.


Willow nearly jumped out of her skin and swerved an inch, but it was an empty road, so she recovered quickly.


“Whoa, baby,” Tara said in a calming voice, moving her hand to grip Willow’s shoulder.


“Rollercoaster car!” Sally called out from the back and started cackling to herself.


Tara gently rubbed Willow’s upper arm.


“A bit noisy up there?”


Willow’s heart was still hammering as she recovered. She glanced into the rearview mirror at the backseat.


“As much as I love Lana Del Rey, she’s going to Lana Del Flay my eardrums in a minute.”


Tara looked over her shoulder.


“Switch to earbuds, please. And turn it down. If I can hear it through the earbuds, it’s too loud.”


Sally rolled her eyes but complied and bopped quietly to herself in her seat.


Tara turned back to Willow.


“This is supposed to be a weekend off, sweetie. I think this shoulder is composed solely of knots.”


Willow shifted her tight shoulders uncomfortably.


“Just want to…fit everything in. Check in with the guys with everything going on. Oh, and um, your birthday.”


Selfishly, Tara wasn’t thrilled that her birthday came second, but she’d never say that.


“There’s time,” she reassured softly instead. “It’s a holiday weekend.”


Willow nodded quickly.


“Right. No need to be in a big furry hurry.”


Tara frowned.


“Are you still worried about Buffy and Xander going out every night? I know it’s not ideal but–”


“Tara, I’m fine, okay, I…” Willow paused and took a deep breath. “I just have a lot on my mind, and it’s racing at Willow speed right now. I just need things to settle, okay?”


Tara turned and looked out her window.


“Okay, Willow.”


By the time they arrived, the tension between them wasn’t expressed through anger but through distance. A distance that had been encroaching since Tara overheard Willow talking with Xander for the fifth time in one day, and then shut the door when she saw Tara glance in.


It shouldn’t have hurt as much as it did, but Tara remembered being hidden all through their adolescence, and it felt like she was being cut out of that part of Willow’s life all over again.


It was late when they got to Sunnydale, but Willow still surprised Tara by saying she’d promised to meet Buffy and Xander at the Bronze.


This put Tara in a difficult position as she felt obliged to go see Anya in return, and so she spent her night talking her friend out of various schemes involving harming Xander, wondering to herself if they weren’t all a bit too grown for all of this.


Tara was asleep when Willow came home, and Tara woke up to an empty bed, though there was still an impression where Willow had been. Tara vaguely remembered waking up in the middle of the night with arms around her.


She went downstairs, where Sally was slurping up cereal at the kitchen table, and Kimberly was standing at the sink, peering out the window at the sky.


“Good morning.”


Sally started choking on her Chex, and Kimberly jumped back in shock.


“Tara! You scared me!”


Tara’s eyes flitted between the other two slowly.


“Sor…ry?” she said, wondering what was so shocking about such a greeting. “Is Willow here?”


Sally and Kimberly exchanged a not-so-furtive glance.


“Out,” Sally eventually said before shoveling more cereal into her mouth.


“Out?” Tara asked, arching an eyebrow.


She frowned. Why the hell was everyone acting so weird?


“I guess with her friends?” Kimberly replied as she started to hum and busy herself by hiding behind the door of the fridge.


Tara swallowed.


“Oh.”


Guess it was too much to ask that they might spend her birthday together.


“I got you gum,” Sally offered, producing a pack from her pocket.


Tara slowly lifted it, half expecting it to shock her.


“You got me gum for my birthday?”


She was confused. It was just real gum, promising to freshen her breath.


Great.


Apparently, she had bad breath now too, and she needed to teach Sally the art of subtlety.


Suddenly, Kimberly shut the fridge a little harder than intended, and it was Tara who jumped this time, missing the ‘oh shit’ looks between Kimberly and Sally.


They were so preoccupied with what day it was, they forgot what day it was.


“I have something for you!” Kimberly announced, relieved she’d finished Tara’s gift before Willow had even told her of her plans.


She rushed off upstairs, and Tara went to pull up a chair at the table. Before she could ask Sally if she’d seen Willow before she left, Kimberly came back down, holding a giant cylindrical mess of fabric.


“Sally, help me unroll it.”


Sally pushed her bowl away and went up to Kimberly. Together, they rolled out what was a patchwork quilt with all kinds of colors and designs, some of which Tara recognized from old clothing, and right in the middle were two mermaids, one redhead, one brunette.


“Oh wow, that is…” Tara said, taking it all in.


Some might say tacky, but Tara only had one word.


“Beautiful.”


“Forgive me for not wrapping it,” Kimberly replied with a shy smile. “I’ve been putting it together for a while now.”


“You made it?” Tara asked, though of course that was obvious on reflection.


Kimberly lowered her hand and went to cup Tara’s cheek.


“With all my love for my baby girl,” she said, smiling toward Tara’s eyes. “I hope you don’t think the mermaids are too silly. They played The Little Mermaid for the residents at work a few weeks back, and I had such flashbacks to you and Willow watching it over and over.”


“It’s incredibly sweet,” Tara smiled and stood up to hug her mother.


“Uh, guys?” Sally’s muffled voice came as Kimberly had dropped her corner of the quilt and accidentally buried Sally underneath.


There was a small laugh between mother and daughter, and they helped free Sally and rolled the quilt back up.


“Sit,” Kimberly ordered when they’d left it on the arm of the couch. “I’ll make you birthday pancakes.”


Sally looked contrite.


“I made you something too. But I forgot it at home.”


“That’s okay, sweetie,” Tara reassured softly.


Sally looked like she had a sudden brainwave.


“I have a photo!”


She pulled her phone from her pocket and scooted around to show Tara. On screen was a small figure with rounded arms and legs, dressed in something similar to what Tara had in her closet.


“It’s a little ‘you’ with all the leftover pieces of felt from the DJ Tarot patches you didn’t want to throw out,” she said, clearly proud. “I used the machine like you showed me. See the edges? It was Willow’s idea to use googly eyes. Did you know she has a personal stash on her at all times?”


She sighed dramatically.


“And I made a Willow one too so you could be together.”


She showed Tara a similar Willow in a requisite fuzzy sweater, which the felt was actually perfect for.


“I love those.” Tara hugged Sally sidelong before glancing toward the front door. “Shame we’re not together right now.”


Sally suddenly paused.


“Oh!” she said, her eyes glancing furtively at Tara’s hands. “Your nails.”


Tara looked up.


“What about them?”


Sally froze.


Kimberly slowly looked over.


Sally recovered with visible effort.


“They’re…not painted.”


Tara curled her fingers to look at her nails.


“…no?”


Sally leaned forward eagerly.


“Well…they could be. I mean, you painted them on your birthday last year.”


Had she?


Tara looked down at her hands self-consciously.


“Yeah, I guess.”


Sally smirked at Kimberly, who gave her a sly wink.


Tara was still looking at her hands.


After breakfast, while Sally was raiding the bathroom cabinet and Kimberly washed the dishes, Tara spread the quilt over her lap.


She found herself tracing the tiny stitches around one of the mermaids.


Willow would love this.


The thought arrived automatically, then another followed.


If she were here.


She checked her phone, but there was nothing.


After a moment, she smiled anyway. Willow was probably planning something. Willow always spoiled her on her birthday, so she had to be planning something.


Right?


She hated that the question even occurred to her.


In town, Willow was plotting her route for the tenth time.


She wasn’t really with Buffy and Xander. They were still sleeping off their hangovers, probably.


She’d practically had to dump Xander onto his couch the night before, biting back a remark about his resemblance to his father, and the last she’d seen of Buffy was riding away on the back of some dude’s motorcycle after being distracted by and hiding her phone all night.


Maybe that was all normal for ‘college kids’ (though neither Buffy nor Xander were actually enrolled), but if it was, Willow was glad her college life meant coming home to her family every night. She wasn’t sure she recognized the friends she went out with last night.


And that, of course, brought forward the guilt.


She put it to the back of her mind as she checked her watch to make sure they would make it back to the house even at the most leisurely of strolls. She’d secretly spent the last week timing Tara’s pace so she could figure out the optimum time to leave the restaurant but needed backups for her backups if she had any hope of pulling this off.


Her hand went into her jeans pocket again, palming the ring box between her fingers.


Conversely, this calmed her.


Because it made her think of Tara’s smile.


Just one more check that everything was in place and she could be home before lunch so she could spend the afternoon teasing Tara with what was to come. She even had a gift wrapped for her: an antique baby blue charm bracelet that she had bought on hire-purchase, so it was old, new, borrowed, and blue all in one.


She would pamper Tara and make her feel beautiful as they dressed for the evening, then wine and dine her at dinner, and finally make her swoon with a marriage proposal so reverently thought out and executed that she knew she was saying yes to an eternity of love.


Finally, as satisfied as she could be that everything was good to go for later, Willow made a small detour.


She had allowed herself exactly thirty extra minutes that morning.


Check on Xander.


Check on Buffy.


Go home to the love of her life.


Willow checked her watch as she climbed the porch steps to Xander’s apartment, holding a sub from the Rocket Café that she’d bought on the way.


Twenty-three minutes left.


Make sure he was alive, make sure Anya hadn’t strangled him, brief Summers stop, done.


She’d even set an alarm.


Xander answered the door with a grunt. Willow took a visible step backward.


“Whoa.”


“I’ve looked better,” Xander admitted, slicking a hand back through greasy hair.


“I’ve seen corpses with more color,” Willow muttered as she handed over the sandwich.


Xander started tearing into the sandwich like a wild animal.


Willow glanced around at the apartment in the cold light of day and started to tidy up.


“When was the last time you did laundry? On second thought, don’t answer that.”


She didn’t even have to parent the actual child she parented this much.


She glanced at her watch.


Twenty more minutes.


Maybe she could get Buffy over here and kill two birds with one stone. She kept cleaning, so at least she wouldn’t be inviting her over to a sub-frat house level disaster zone.


“You want to invite Buffy over for a game of Life? I walked by the Doublemeat Palace, and she wasn’t working, so she’s probably free.”


Unless she’s still in the bed of Mr. Motorbike.


She sent the text anyway.


“Life? Because we’re all doing so wonderfully at it,” Xander replied sarcastically, but at least used real words.


“I am, actually.” Willow stood up straight for a moment before shrinking again. “Sorry.”


“Hey, no need to hold back on the happy,” Xander grinned from the couch. “Tell me all about you and Tara getting happy.”


Willow’s face immediately flamed red.


“You’re a real jerk sometimes, you know that?”


Xander looked like he’d been slapped.


“Willow, it was just a joke,” he said, standing up and squaring his shoulders uncomfortably. “Can’t you take a joke anymore? Or did you leave your sense of humor in one of those foreign countries you traipsed around?”


Willow dropped the empty chip packet she’d just picked up.


“Traipsed around? What are you talking about?”


Xander started to splutter a little.


“You, you left! For a whole year! And then you came back just to go again. And you come back throwing your perfect little life in our faces. You’re not the same Willow I grew up with!”


“Thank god!” Willow replied, her pulse racing now. “Don’t you know how miserable I was?”


Xander reeled back at that.


“You were?”


“Yes, I–” Willow stopped, holding her hands up in front of her. “I don’t have time to offload two decades of trauma right now. I actually have something really important to do tonight.”


And she felt absolutely no desire to share it. Not because she was scared, like when she was a kid.


The opposite.


Because she wouldn’t allow her happiness to be tarnished.


“Take tonight off, Xand. Figure out whether you’re becoming the man you wanted to be…or just the one you grew up with.”


Xander’s whole body tensed.


“Ego meet dagger.”


Then silence.


Xander’s mouth opened and closed. Willow hadn’t realized until that second that she’d never actually admitted it aloud, not to him.


She had been miserable.


Terrified.


Lonely.


Every single day.


Xander looked genuinely lost.


“I…”


He rubbed the back of his neck.


“I didn’t know all that miserable stuff.”


They stared at each other for a very long moment until Willow’s watch started beeping. She glanced down.


“Shit.”


Xander sank down onto the couch, rubbing his eyes with the heels of his hands.


“I think she really means it, Will.”


Willow looked up.


“Who?”


Xander looked at Willow like she was crazy.


“Anya.”


Willow felt a sinking feeling low in her stomach. She glanced at her watch.


Okay, I can give him five more minutes. He’s finally talking. If I leave now, he’ll just shut down again.


She sat tentatively beside him.


“Have you tried actually, I dunno, winning her back?”


Xander bristled.


His resolve quickly faded.


“Do you really think I’m my dad?”


Willow didn’t answer immediately.


She knew lying would only make this worse.


He stopped and swallowed.


“I keep hearing myself,” he admitted, meeting Willow’s eye. “Then I hear him.”


He looked afraid.


“And they sound the same.”


No Willow thought, tensing right down to her toes, Not now. Please, not today…this can’t happen today.


For her best friend, Willow reminded herself.


She had to have time.


“You’re not your Dad, Xand,” Willow reassured softly. “But…but you could be. If you don’t stop going down this road.”


Her feet were antsy. She stood, reaching for her jacket.


“Why don’t I leave you to ponder that for a while. I really have to–”


Xander didn’t look up.


“Do you think Anya’s happier without me?”


Willow closed her eyes and slowly turned back.


As she sat back down, her watch vibrated again.


Without looking, she silenced it with the side of her thumb.


The knock came before either of them could say another word.


Xander rubbed both hands over his face.


“Saved by the Buff.”


Willow answered and gave Buffy a quick sidelong hug and a ‘look’.


Buffy stopped halfway through the doorway.


“…did I interrupt something?”


She looked at Willow.


“You have your ‘I’m fixing everybody’ face on.”


“No,” Willow tried to quickly dismiss, but Xander had already flaked out on the couch.


“Yep.”


Buffy looked between them.


“…cool. Normal amount of emotional repression happening in here. Well, I have popcorn.”


Her eyes were sunken, but she was smiling, so that was something. Her muscles seemed relaxed, which wasn’t surprising given what she’d likely been up to last night, but Willow got the sense not to bring it up.


Xander motioned her over.


“Buffy gets free leftovers at work. I exploit the system.”


“It’s an unofficial benefit,” Buffy said with a sigh. “Which is something because it’s not like I get any real ones.”


“You wanna watch X-Men?” Xander suggested, as though he’d stuffed the conversation about Anya back into the box it had come from.


Willow needed to sit for a minute after the unexpected burst of emotion.


“As long as it’s Days of Future Past,” she found herself saying without even realizing.


I’ll leave after they’re settled. Once they’re okay, I’ll go.


Willow sat on the sofa, flicking away an old Cheeto, and watched the Marvel logo pop up on screen.


Buffy dropped down to sit on the other side of Willow, and they all curled up in a familiar manner.


Now this was the Buffy and Xander Willow knew. The ones who could drown their sorrows together without literally drowning themselves.


And sitting around, watching movies, throwing popcorn at each other, it was like old times. Throw in a bit of classic Scooby banter, and Willow started to relax as the tension lifted. Maybe this was it. Maybe all they needed was someone to remind them who they were. If she could just be present enough to have their backs…maybe they’d be okay again.


Without even noticing, she’d quietly stepped back into the space she’d always occupied between them.


And yeah…she missed it.


Somewhere during Wolverine’s third sarcastic one-liner, Buffy stole Xander’s popcorn.


Xander protested.


Buffy threw a handful at him.


Willow laughed.


A real laugh.


The kind that reminded her that high school wasn’t all bad. She wasn’t always terrified and miserable and lonely. Sometimes she was just the Willster.


She hadn’t realized how tightly she’d been holding herself until that moment. Her shoulders slumped, perhaps even a knot or two unravelling.


Nobody was falling apart, and nobody was pretending.


They were just…


Them.


The Scoobies, who named themselves such after being teased about the likeness to the characters, the underdogs who found each other and bonded, the three friends who were there for each other thick and thin.


They were a part of her identity, and Willow just wished she could do a spell and fix them.


But maybe this right here was her spell. Togetherness.


When the credits finally rolled, Xander stretched, groaned dramatically, and reached for the remote.


“Apocalypse?” he asked.


Buffy shrugged.


“We’re committed now.”


Willow smiled.


“…yeah.”


For the first time in what felt like forever, things were actually easy. These were the people she wanted to share her joy with. The ones who would be excited to hear her news. This was how it should be.


Her.


Buffy.


Xander.


…


Tara.


Her heart leapt and, as if mocking her, her watch started to buzz.


She looked down with slowly dawning horror.


Upcoming – Dinner Reservation – 5:00 PM


Her stomach dropped. How many reminders had she flicked away without even realizing?


“No.”


“What?” Buffy asked.


Willow checked the time again.


The numbers didn’t change.


No…


“How has it been that long?!”


She looked around the room.


The popcorn was gone, Apocalypse was halfway through another world-ending speech, and her two best friends, finally bearing some relaxed faces, were looking at her like she was about to launch into a compare and contrast of the movies.


And then it hit.


How familiar this had all felt, because it was.


Sitting between Buffy and Xander.


Keeping the peace.


Making sure everyone else was okay.


And neglecting Tara in the process.


“Oh, my God.”


“What?” Buffy asked again.


“It’s Tara’s birthday,” Willow said in an echoing voice.


Silence.


“I’ve been here…”


She looked back at her watch.


“…all day.”


Then panic.


“SHIT!”


She rocked forward.


“Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit!”


She jumped up and ran around the coffee table.


“I have to go!”


“Chill out, it’s still early!” Xander said, throwing a piece of popcorn at her jovially.


“It’s Tara’s birthday!” Willow repeated, then grabbed her head in horror. “GOD, it’s Tara’s birthday, and I’ve been gone all day, and I’m going to propose tonight, and we have reservations, and I have to GO!”


Buffy and Xander’s heads flew toward each other, then back at Willow.


“Back up to that second last thing?” Buffy asked with wide eyes.


Willow made a beeline for the door.


“I have to go!”


She ran like she had never run before.


It wasn’t supposed to go like this. She was supposed to be home before Tara could even tell she was gone, but her head was so cluttered in trying to balance all of the relationships in this town that she’d now be lucky to even change for dinner.


She flew through the door as soon as Kimberly answered it and pointed upstairs to indicate where Tara was.


“Willow–”


“Everything is still a-go!” Willow called back in a loud whisper while ascending the stairs.


Willow paused outside Tara’s bedroom to catch her breath, then did a single knock and walked in.


Tara was lying on her bed, looking up at the ceiling, but sat up when the door opened.


“Willow.”


“Tara,” Willow replied, quickly coming over to sit next to her. “I’m so sorry I haven’t been here all day. I had to do some stuff, and then I went to check on the guys, and I-I guess I just lost track of time.”


Her phone buzzed and fell out of her pocket at that moment.


She looked at it.


Another message chain lighting up. Xander or Buffy, unsurprising but also annoying.


Tara finally spoke.


“Will.”


Willow blinked.


“Hm?”


“You’ve been gone all day.”


The words weren’t sharp, which somehow made them worse.


Willow looked down at the bed, guilt eating her alive.


“I know. I’m sorry.”


“I know,” Tara answered, then leaned back against the wall, watching her carefully. “What’s going on?”


Willow quickly shook her head.


“Nothing.”


Tara paused.


“Is this because of Buffy?”


Willow hesitated.


Tara nodded.


“Okay.”


Willow’s face scrunched in discomfiture.


“No…”


“Is it Xander?” Tara prompted again. “Both?”


Willow looked away.


Tara swallowed.


“Is it us?”


Willow looked horrified.


The color drained from her face.


“Us?”


Like the thought had never even occurred to her.


“No, god no! Can we just–can we just forget and start over?”


It worked with Kimberly.


“Nothing is wrong,” she repeated, more to herself.


Tara looked down sadly.


“You are genuinely terrible at lying.”


Willow huffed out a weak laugh.


“Lied to myself for years.”


Normally, that would’ve broken the tension.


This time it didn’t. Silence stretched through the room until Tara spoke again.


“Did something happen?”


“No,” Willow shook her head, a vein in her forehead bulging in frustration.


Could they just stop talking about everyone else? Didn’t Tara know today was supposed to be all about her?


No, you idiot. Because you made it all about them.


“Is everybody okay?” Tara prompted again.


Willow tried to speak but was too overwhelmed.


Tara caught it.


The screen lit up between them.


SCOOBIES (12)

XANDER (7)

BUFFY (5)


Tara reached over and gently took the phone from Willow’s hands. She didn’t read them. She simply turned the phone face down.


“They’re going to survive ten minutes.”


Willow closed her eyes as her breath and words caught in her throat. Tara took both sets of Willow’s hands and held them firmly.


“Hey,” she said quietly. “Look at me for a second.”


Willow did.


Tara’s expression softened immediately.


No anger, just concern, and that almost broke Willow.


“You’re carrying everybody again.”


Willow swallowed hard.


“I’m trying not to.”


“I know,” Tara breathed.


The understanding in Tara’s voice almost undid Willow immediately.


That was the problem with Tara.


She understood things before Willow could even explain them.


“I just…” Willow rubbed tiredly at her face. “Everybody’s having such a hard time lately and…”


She couldn’t say the rest. Not without dinner and flowers and candles and everything else. Trying to explain her absence filled her with shame, and she felt overpowered by it: for Tara, for her friends, for living well.


Tara nodded, giving her space.


“And we came here, and everything’s just…” Willow gestured helplessly around them. “Nice.”


There was genuine confusion in Tara’s expression then.


“Willow.”


“I know how that sounds,” Willow said quickly, all in a rush. “I don’t mean… It’s just Buffy and Xander… They need me. I…”


She could only repeat her words.


“I know how that sounds.”


Tara sighed.


“No, I don’t think you do.”


Willow laughed weakly, humorlessly. Well, she’d opened this floodgate now, and there was no putting it back in.


“They’re…just two lost souls swimming in a fishbowl. Buffy’s in her bad boy phase and Xander’s life is imploding, and we’re walking around all with our lives put together and like-”


“Like you’re not allowed to have a nice weekend?” Tara asked gently.


Willow fell silent. It wasn’t about the weekend.


Tara’s face softened even further. She scooted closer on the bed until their knees touched.


“You don’t have to feel guilty for being happy.”


Willow stared down at her hands.


“I know that logically.”


Tara smiled sadly.


“Yeah. You’re great at logic.”


That almost made it worse.


Because Tara knew exactly what she meant.


Willow’s throat tightened unexpectedly.


“I just keep thinking maybe I should come back more. Then that…maybe leaving Sunnydale wasn’t the brave thing. Maybe it was abandoning people who loved me.”


She gnawed on the corner of her thumb.


“Which is a crazy thought, but it’s what goes through the ol’ Willow brain.”


Her tone begged for reassurance. Tara wasn’t sure she had it to give.


“There was always going to be something.”


Willow looked away.


“There’s always going to be somebody hurting,” Tara continued softly. “That’s part of loving people.”


Willow’s phone buzzed again against the bed between them, and Willow shoved it into her pocket.


Tara reached for Willow’s hand as she took it back out. Willow gently played with Tara’s fingers.


“Your nails are pretty,” she said as she admired the bright red paint, finding herself twisting around Tara’s ring finger.


She pulled away quickly lest she give herself away.


“You don’t have to earn your happiness, you know,” Tara said quietly. “You deserve it just because.”


She reached over to touch Willow’s other hand.


“You know what I think?”


Willow looked up.


“I think if Buffy knew what you were doing to yourself today, she’d tell you to knock it off,” Tara advised softly.


Willow blinked.


“And Xander?”


Tara smiled sadly.


“He’d probably make a joke I wouldn’t understand but would laugh at anyway.”


Willow laughed despite herself. Tara swallowed.


“But neither of them would ask you to stop loving me.”


“Stop loving you?” Willow asked in disbelief. “Tara, that isn’t even in my DNA.”


She looked at Tara in shock and almost blabbed right there. She started to reach into her pocket to pull out the ring, but Tara mistook it for her reaching for her phone and stood up somewhat abruptly, making Willow dip as the mattress sagged.


“You always make me feel special, Willow,” Tara said, her voice cracking slightly as she looked at her girlfriend. “You always make me feel like I’m the most important person in the room. But today…”


She looked down.


“I didn’t feel like I was even in it.”


She hurried out of the room.


“Tara…” Willow said, then jumped up to follow. “Tara!”


She ran out the front door as Willow got to the last step. Willow held her head in her hands, her heart beating in a fast, odd rhythm. Her brain was working in a similar manner.


She was trying so hard to protect her happiness from her friends’ pain that she accidentally sacrificed the happiness itself.


Kimberly and Sally’s heads popped around the doorframe from the living room.


Willow leaned against the railing. The words scraped out of her throat.


“Well, there I go Willow-ing it all up again!”


The front door slammed.


Silence.


Willow stood frozen. Kimberly didn’t speak. Sally didn’t either.


Willow slowly reached into her pocket and pulled out the ring box.


She sank onto a step and opened it, the ruby catching the afternoon sunlight.


Hours. Days. Weeks.


Asking Kimberly. Planning the perfect proposal.


She had timed the sunset.


Measured walking speed.


Booked restaurants.


Bought candles.


Recorded twilight.


And somehow…


Somehow…


She hadn’t managed to make Tara feel loved on her birthday.


Her thumb rested against the velvet lid, but she couldn’t bring herself to close it. The ring suddenly felt impossibly heavy.


And Willow wondered whether she’d already missed the moment she’d been planning for months.

[Will's redemption]

Late dibs!
Laragh, you meanie!

I was hoping to witness the romantic proposal and you give us this! But I trust you'll make it all better in todays chapter.

I think it's sad that Willow got so engrossed in meticulously planning the proposal itself and the buildup to it while worrying about her stumbling friends that she totally missed Tara feeling neglected by her in the last weeks.

Just one more check that everything was in place and she could be home before lunch so she could spend the afternoon teasing Tara with what was to come. She even had a gift wrapped for her: an antique baby blue charm bracelet that she had bought on hire-purchase, so it was old, new, borrowed, and blue all in one.


She would pamper Tara and make her feel beautiful as they dressed for the evening, then wine and dine her at dinner, and finally make her swoon with a marriage proposal so reverently thought out and executed that she knew she was saying yes to an eternity of love.

In my opinion that plan had a big flaw from the start: Leaving Tara to wake up and start the day alone, without even a rose and a little love letter to find on the bed next to her. Willow should have showered Tara with love since waking up and during breakfast and then she could have gone out for an hour or so with the excuse that she had to prepare a birthday surprise for her.

“Do you really think I’m my dad?”


Willow didn’t answer immediately.


She knew lying would only make this worse.


He stopped and swallowed.


“I keep hearing myself,” he admitted, meeting Willow’s eye. “Then I hear him.”


He looked afraid.


“And they sound the same.”


No Willow thought, tensing right down to her toes, Not now. Please, not today…this can’t happen today.


For her best friend, Willow reminded herself.


She had to have time.


“You’re not your Dad, Xand,” Willow reassured softly. “But…but you could be. If you don’t stop going down this road.”

I think that Willow was right to stay in this moment, and also not to leave immediately after Buffy arrived. BUT she should have left after the first movie ended, giving the good reason of wanting to spend the rest of Tara's birthday with Tara.

“It’s Tara’s birthday!” Willow repeated, then grabbed her head in horror. “GOD, it’s Tara’s birthday, and I’ve been gone all day, and I’m going to propose tonight, and we have reservations, and I have to GO!”


Buffy and Xander’s heads flew toward each other, then back at Willow.


“Back up to that second last thing?” Buffy asked with wide eyes.

I have hope that after Willow and Tara got engaged and Willow has asked Xander to be her "best man" at the wedding it will help him to get out of this emotional hole and prevent a full descent into alcoholism.

“You’ve been gone all day.”


The words weren’t sharp, which somehow made them worse.


Willow looked down at the bed, guilt eating her alive.


“I know. I’m sorry.”

“You always make me feel special, Willow,” Tara said, her voice cracking slightly as she looked at her girlfriend. “You always make me feel like I’m the most important person in the room. But today…”


She looked down.


“I didn’t feel like I was even in it.”

I do understand that Tara feels hurt. But as I understand the timeline it ist still before 5 pm. So Tara waited for Willow for maybe ten hours (if she got up at 9 am) but there are still seven hours left until midnight. So I think running away from Willow now instead of spending the rest of the day with her and giving her the chance of making up for her previous absence is the wrong decision.
I hope that Tara will soon come to the same conclusion and return after a short walk. Maybe she'll just go into the garden for some fresh air and find the prepared candles proposal there?

Somehow…


She hadn’t managed to make Tara feel loved on her birthday.


Her thumb rested against the velvet lid, but she couldn’t bring herself to close it. The ring suddenly felt impossibly heavy.


And Willow wondered whether she’d already missed the moment she’d been planning for months.

That Willow seems to assume her current "failure" has ruined the chances for an engagement once and for all and might even lead to the end of their relationship makes me sad. There is still much work left for her therapist...

Laragh, I trust that you won't let Willow totally spiral into despair and that either Tara will come back or Kimberly will urge Willow to follow Tara so they can make up, solve this misunderstanding and the proposal can still happen, turning this birthday into Tara's "best birthday" after a crappy start.

[Laragh]

Will's redemption —

Late dibs!

Laragh, you meanie!

I was hoping to witness the romantic proposal and you give us this! But I trust you'll make it all better in todays chapter.

It'd be boring if it all worked out perfectly

I think it's sad that Willow got so engrossed in meticulously planning the proposal itself and the buildup to it while worrying about her stumbling friends that she totally missed Tara feeling neglected by her in the last weeks.

I feel like one of Willow's flaws is she hones too much in on big picture stuff and so 'justifies' things to make it work

In my opinion that plan had a big flaw from the start: Leaving Tara to wake up and start the day alone, without even a rose and a little love letter to find on the bed next to her. Willow should have showered Tara with love since waking up and during breakfast and then she could have gone out for an hour or so with the excuse that she had to prepare a birthday surprise for her.

A much wiser choice, though in her defence, she did originally intend to be back before Tara even woke up. She went for 'just one more runthrough' and got completely caught up. But she should have had a contingency note I agree!

I think that Willow was right to stay in this moment, and also not to leave immediately after Buffy arrived. BUT she should have left after the first movie ended, giving the good reason of wanting to spend the rest of Tara's birthday with Tara.

You won't get an argument from me, she f'd up!

I have hope that after Willow and Tara got engaged and Willow has asked Xander to be her "best man" at the wedding it will help him to get out of this emotional hole and prevent a full descent into alcoholism.

I'll just say nobody wants to deal with full blown alcoholic Xander, least of all me! Donny was enough!

I do understand that Tara feels hurt. But as I understand the timeline it ist still before 5 pm. So Tara waited for Willow for maybe ten hours (if she got up at 9 am) but there are still seven hours left until midnight. So I think running away from Willow now instead of spending the rest of the day with her and giving her the chance of making up for her previous absence is the wrong decision.

It's more than just the one day, it's the reminder of how things used to be.

I hope that Tara will soon come to the same conclusion and return after a short walk. Maybe she'll just go into the garden for some fresh air and find the prepared candles proposal there?

Maybe, maybe...

That Willow seems to assume her current "failure" has ruined the chances for an engagement once and for all and might even lead to the end of their relationship makes me sad. There is still much work left for her therapist...

I don't think there's ever an end to work you can do in therapy!

Laragh, I trust that you won't let Willow totally spiral into despair and that either Tara will come back or Kimberly will urge Willow to follow Tara so they can make up, solve this misunderstanding and the proposal can still happen, turning this birthday into Tara's "best birthday" after a crappy start.

You know me so well.

Thanks for your feedback

---

Update Directly Below

[Laragh]

---

Love Is A Verb

---

It’s Not A Test
Nor A Trick Of The Mind
Only Love

Just Say Yes

Kimberly came and put her arms around Willow’s shoulders.


“What happened?”


“I happened,” Willow replied, near tears. “I was so obsessed with making it special that I missed making her feel special.”


Kimberly brought Willow into the living room and sat her on the couch while she went to make tea. Tara’s sweater was hanging over the arm, which Willow immediately pulled on and lifted the sides to inhale.


“Gross,” Sally said from across the room. “What’d you do?”


“I wasn’t here when I should have been,” Willow answered honestly. “See, Sally…”


She took a deep breath as she tried to explain.


“Love…”


What a word. Unexplainable, really.


“Love is a verb,” she settled on eventually. “Love is a doing word.”


She shook her head.


“One of the hardest moments of my life was when I realized that I hadn’t just been too afraid to tell Tara I loved her, I’d also been too afraid to show it. And she had no idea,” she continued with glassy eyes. “That was the moment I knew I had to show her just how much every minute of every day.”


“That’s why you’re so gross?” Sally asked with some reverence despite the wording.


Willow nodded resolutely.


“That is why we’re so close.”


Sally seemed to consider it all for a moment before offering advice.


“Give her an old tomato.”


Willow’s brow furrowed.


“What?”


“An old tomato,” Sally replied like it was obvious. “That’s what Aaron says his dad gives his other dad when they fight.”


Confused silence passed between them.


“Is it a gay thing?” Sally asked.


“No!” Willow retorted, then her forehead creased unsurely. “I don’t…I don’t think so?”


Kimberly returned with tea, which Willow took gratefully. She leaned against the blanket on the couch and did a small double-take as she rested the cup on it.


“Are these mermaids?” she asked, then after a long sip. “Are these…me and Tara as mermaids?”


“Just a little thing I put together,” Kimberly replied shyly. “I’ll always think of you two as my little mermaids.”


“Even though I was Sebastian?” Willow asked through a watery laugh.


“As cute as you were,” Kimberly smiled tenderly. “I know you only let Tara be Ariel because she wanted it so much, even though you were the natural choice with your hair.”


Willow nodded quickly, overcome by remembering her four-year-old act of love, and inhaled sharply to cut off any more tears.


Before any more conversation could happen, her phone started to ring. Willow was ready to throw the thing across the room, but when she saw it was Ruby’s, the restaurant, she answered quickly.


“Hello?”


She paused while a voice on the other end spoke.


“What do you mean by ‘fire’?!”


Multiple voices were heard in the background, and there was a rough sign-off before the line went dead.


“Willow, what’s wrong?” Kimberly asked, leaning forward to put a hand on Willow’s knee.


“That was, um, the restaurant,” Willow replied in a daze. “There was a kitchen fire. They cancelled the reservation.”


Even though she didn’t think Tara was much in the mood for Marry Me Chicken and therefore probably not in the mood for Marry Me-Willow either, Willow’s heart sank.


And like the angels wanted to mock her sorrow, the heavens chose that moment to open an unexpected downpour. Kimberly looked over her shoulder out the window.


“I knew it was going to rain by the sky this morning.”


Willow jumped up, leaving the cup skidding across the coffee table.


“God, Tara’s out there without a jacket or anything! I gotta go find her!”


“Does this mean the candles are off too?” Kimberly asked as she followed Willow to the door.


“Yeah, rain and candles aren’t the best mix,” Sally observed astutely without getting off the beanbag.


“I’ll worry about it once I know she’s okay,” Willow replied as she opened the front door.


Kimberly opened the hall closet and pulled something out.


“Take an umbrella.”


Willow grabbed it and opened it up as soon as she was outside, shielding herself from the droplets as they splashed around her.


Just her luck.


Rain. In the dry season. In Southern California.


Maybe the universe was telling her something.


She adjusted Tara’s sweater against the breeze and felt a small comfort as the fabric brushed her skin, as if it were Tara herself touching her. As she wandered aimlessly in search of her love, she found herself still rolling the ring box between her fingers right up until some music caught her ear.


And if you have a minute, why don’t we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don’t we go?
So why don’t we go?


“Somewhere only we know,” Willow sang under her breath, almost subconsciously, as she walked over to the source, which was a little hand radio at a greengrocer’s shack, which was in the midst of closing.


She pushed the ring deep into the sweater pocket and found her eyes settling on the basket full of tomatoes, unsure what exactly she was looking for.


Did the degree of oldness correlate to the degree of atonement?


“Do you have any like…rotting tomatoes?” she asked the man who was sweeping.


He looked her up and down.


“You’re older than the crowd who normally come around.”


Willow looked up sharply.


“I’m not going to throw them at something. Or someone!”


Her whole core was offended at the suggestion. He held up a hand.


“Don’t wanna know.”


He kicked a basket on the floor in her direction. Inside was a delightful selection of rotting avocados, navel oranges, a couple of reddish-brown apples, and right in the middle, like it was presenting itself to Willow, was a big heirloom tomato with sunken, dark, leathery patches on the bottom. Willow picked it up by the vine, avoiding letting it touch her clothes.


“Um, thanks.”


She set it down near the register and fished out the only cash she had on her, a $50 bill she’d intended to be the generous tip at Ruby’s.


“Register’s closed. Take it.”


“Right,” Willow replied, biting her lip. “It’s just that, see, this is an apology tomato.”


The man looked blank. Willow couldn’t blame him.


“Karmically, I can’t just take it. I have to earn it. Or in this case, pay for it.”


More blankness. Willow put the $50 down.


“You know what, just keep it all. Um. Thanks.”


She picked the tomato up by the vine again. The man shook his head, muttering.


“Damn snowflakes.”


Willow noticed him pocket the cash anyway. She made a pained face, but she didn’t have time to dwell on it.


With the umbrella handle in one hand and the vine between two fingers on the other, she knew exactly where to go. Willow jogged across town to the park and spotted Tara sitting on a bench, getting shelter under a tree.


Willow approached, holding the umbrella over Tara first before taking the seat beside her to cover them both.


“I knew you’d find me,” Tara said while looking ahead, then slowly shifted her gaze to Willow. “You always do.”


Willow said nothing, just silently extended the tomato as an offering.


Tara blinked several times.


“What…what is this?”


“It’s an old tomato,” Willow replied with a frown in her voice. “It isn’t a gay thing?”


“To give someone an old tomato?” Tara asked, bewildered.


“I…” Willow trailed off, shaking her head. “Sally said Aaron’s Dads do it when one of them is mad at the other. Then I got insecure that I wasn’t gay enough. This really isn’t a thing?”


“Not that I know–” Tara paused, her eyes closing and a small smile playing on her lips. “Willow.”


“What?” Willow asked earnestly, still holding the thing at the very end of her fingers.


Tara’s lips lightly pressed together.


“I think she meant ‘ultimatum’. They give each other an ultimatum.”


Realization dawned on Willow’s face, and it quickly contorted in disgust. She tossed the tomato over her shoulder into the bushes to go back to nature and rubbed her hand on her thigh.


“We should probably check in on that kid more.”


“Yeah, somehow I don’t see him growing up with the healthiest communication strategies,” Tara replied with a very gentle sigh.


There was a moment of silence, and then they both tried to speak at once. This just resulted in a laugh, and there was a discernible scoot closer to each other.


“You know what I figured out?” Willow asked after another moment passed. “I’ve always been the problem-solver. And my friends…I can’t solve their problems for them. It doesn’t matter what I did or didn’t do, they’re adults making their own decisions. Just like I had to. Just like I still do. And that’s…hard. Because I tied a lot of my worth up in how I could help.”


She turned to meet Tara’s gaze.


“But I’m a lot more than that. And I can’t sink back into those old thinking habits.”


Tara offered a smile of understanding.


“It’s funny, I was thinking the same thing.”


She looked out to the park and then back at Willow.


“Do you know why I always considered The Little Mermaid ‘our’ movie?”


“First thing we watched together,” Willow replied easily. “And dressed up for Halloween.”


Tara nodded.


“Yes. And I love those memories. But the thing that always stayed with me…was the song that went through my head when you started to push me away.”


She closed her eyes and inhaled before she sang.


“Wish I could be…part of that world.”


It was completely silent around them, and that made the single sung line so much more haunting. Willow felt her heart shatter into a million pieces, which made it even worse when Tara laughed.


“I hadn’t thought of that in years, Willow.”


Willow felt a big dark cloud descend all around her. She couldn’t even remember breathing. That one line contained every regret she’d carried for years. Hearing Tara sing it now felt like opening an old wound she’d believed had finally healed.


“And I brought it all back.”


Tara slapped her hand on Willow’s thigh.


“No, honey, listen,” she said, staring at Willow for emphasis. “I hadn’t thought of that in years.”


Willow searched Tara’s face for any trace of forced reassurance. She didn’t find any. There wasn’t sadness there. There wasn’t resentment. Just quiet certainty.


Like a whoosh of Disney magic, Willow felt those shattered pieces be put back together.


“Because you give your all to me,” Tara continued. “And one funky day when there’s a lot going on doesn’t change that. And I think…I forgot something today, too.”


Willow frowned slightly. Tara smiled.


“I spent so much of today mourning the hours we’d lost that I forgot to look at the hours we still had. I don’t think I want to do that anymore. You’re not hiding me away again, I know–”


Willow suddenly shouted at the top of her lungs, startling Tara.


“I LOVE TARA MACLAY!”


Willow went full Tom Cruise and jumped up onto the bench on her feet.


“I LOVE THIS WOMAN. I LOVE TARA MA–”


Tara pulled Willow down, laughing and beaming.


“I know, I know.”


“I want everyone to know,” Willow replied.


Honestly, she almost pulled the ring out right there. Her fingers even brushed the box in her pocket. But Tara spoke up first, and Willow found herself surrendering to the moment instead.


“You wanna go for a walk?”


Blue sky was returning. Willow followed Tara’s gaze to the clearing sky, a smile tugging at her lips. Her moment would come.


Right now, she just wanted to walk beside Tara.


“Looks like it’s clearing up.”


Willow collapsed the umbrella and stood, offering her hand. Tara took it and squeezed tightly. Neither of them seemed in any hurry to get anywhere.


“I am sorry things got so away from me today. I just need you to know that.”


Tara offered a crooked grin.


“Make it up to me later?”


Willow blushed.


“You have no idea.”


Honestly, Willow didn’t either. Her reservations were canceled, the candles were dubious at best with more possible rain, and in her haste to get home, she’d forgotten to buy the flowers she wanted to present and had no cash left either.


But she decided to do something different from her usual pattern. She wouldn’t worry. She wouldn’t feel guilty about the mistakes she’d made or the things that were out of her control.


Every instinct she had wanted to start solving again. Replace the flowers. Find another restaurant. Salvage the candles. Salvage the day.


For once, she ignored every single one of those instincts.


Because none of those things were what Tara had ever asked for.


She was going for a walk with her love, and that was enough for right now.


They walked into the park, wandering without really deciding where to go, hands linked between them. Every so often, one of them squeezed, and the other squeezed back without either saying a word.


The corner of Willow’s mouth lifted.


Now this felt right.


They started to walk over the little bridge that went over the pond when Willow noticed a small shiver going through Tara.


“Hey,” Willow smiled as she took off her sweater. “I come pre-dressed for all occasions.”


She started to hand over the sweater, remembering at the last second that the ring was in the pocket. With wide eyes, she snatched it back. The quick movement made the umbrella hook around her ankle, spinning her sideways, and the sweater slipped from her hands, sailing over the low railing before splashing into the pond.


Willow gasped.


“No!” she yelled as she flung herself on the railing, watching the sweater sink into the water below. “No, no, no, no, no, no, no!”


She bolted down the bridge and over to the pond’s edge, gripping her hair tightly.


“Willow, it’s okay, it’s just an old sweater,” Tara replied as she calmly walked down.


That calm quickly left when she saw Willow kicking her shoes off and wading into the pond.


“Willow, don’t! It’s all salt marsh!” she said in shock, grabbing her head in much the same way Willow had. “Willow, don’t be ridiculous!”


She watched as Willow sank into a dip in a desperate attempt to grab the sweater.


“Willow!”


She saw Willow sink almost to her knees, stumble again, and keep going.


Without thinking, she dropped her purse on the grass, stepped out of her shoes, and scrambled into the water, swimming her way over to Willow, who was slipping as she kept trying to drive forward to get the sweater.


It was soft, squishy mud underfoot and made it easy to sink into. The water was slippery, and grass brushed against their legs.


“Willow, it’s just an old sweater, I–”


She finally grabbed Willow to steady her just as Willow’s fingers found the sweater snagged on reeds. A moment of relief was quickly counteracted by despair as she bunched it in her hands and felt nothing but slime-coated softness. No bulge. No box. No ring.


“No!”


A sudden drop-off reached Tara’s waist, and she stumbled.


“Willow, what the hell!”


Willow looked at Tara with despondent horror, and Tara looked back with agitated confusion.


It was right at that moment that a floating ring box bobbed between them.


Tara tilted her head, looking at it. Confusion gave way to thought, then realization, each reflected in her widening eyes.


All of the air left Willow’s lungs.


Maybe the universe was telling her something.


As they stood frozen, staring at the ring box, the crabs found them.


“OW!”


Willow snatched the ring box with one hand and slapped her leg with the other.


“Ow!” Tara echoed her, then grabbed Willow’s arm and pulled them both out.


Tara was drenched up to her chest, and Willow was soaked everywhere except her face and the top of her head. Some errant vegetation stuck to pieces of clothing, and up to their ankles were covered in mud.


They were a sight to behold, but all either of them was focused on was the ring box in Willow’s right hand.


Panting, Willow’s eyes went from the box to Tara’s face and back. She slowly met Tara’s gaze again and then did what she’d been planning to do for so long and dropped to one knee.


“Tara.”


Her voice came out gravelly, and she had to swallow several times to clear it.


“This isn’t what I planned. Obviously. I wanted it to be perfect. You deserve perfect. But somehow you love me despite not being perfect. And this is life. Life is messy. Life is…” she paused to clear her throat again. “Green crabs in a salt marsh. But I want to do it all with you. I want to wade through the waters and fight our way out of the mud and soothe every pinch. So. If you want that too…”


She popped open the ring box, which, though soggy, had thankfully saved the glistening ring inside from any imperfections.


“Will you marry me?”


Those words came out the strongest of all.


Tara stared, stunned for a moment.


Then she promptly turned on her heel and ran toward where she’d abandoned her purse.


Willow’s whole body tensed.


She stared after Tara, completely lost.


What the hell was it with the Maclay women and running away from her?


She remained frozen on one knee.


Just as she was about to snap the box closed and contemplate rolling back into the pond and letting it swallow her, Tara rushed back toward her, dropped onto both knees, and with the giddiness of a baby who’d just tasted ice cream for the first time, she produced a ring box of her own.


Beautiful varnished wood with a gold ‘W’ etched on the side.


Something fluttered inside Willow’s chest, and her breath released in a similar trembling gasp.


Tara popped open the box, and inside was the most beautiful, unusual ring Willow had ever seen.


Front and center was a large, heart-shaped clear diamond surrounded by a halo of smaller, circular diamonds. Rather than a simple circular band, there was an intertwining infinity-style curve which crossed over itself in flowing loops with the main band lined with a row of small vivid emeralds. Just above on the opposite side were set globes of iridescent material, catching all of the colors as the sun chose that moment to break through the clouds.


“Oh, my god.”


“D-Do you like it?” Tara asked, an undeniable shake in her voice. “I made it.”


Willow couldn’t answer.


She simply stared.


Every tiny curve, every emerald, every shimmering fragment had Tara written into it.


Someone had made this just for her.


No.


The words registered.


Tara had.


“You MADE it?!” Willow asked in awe, still holding her box open.


“This was the studio I’ve been going to,” Tara admitted, laughing. “I’ve been carrying this around for weeks, waiting for…”


She stopped, her voice tightening with emotion.


“Waiting for the perfect moment.”


Tears sprang to Willow’s eyes and moments later, the same happened to Tara.


“You keep trying to build the perfect moment for me, Willow. But the moments I cherish most are always the ones where we’re just…us. I should have known there wouldn’t be a single perfect moment, because every moment is perfect. They just need to have you in them.”


She smiled through watery eyes.


“Every moment that I have with you brings me joy or brings me growth or lets me know that nothing I do is truly alone. I have someone who fought for me. I have someone who continues fighting for me. I have a partner by my side. And I want to be your partner forever.”


She lifted her box almost shyly.


“Will you marry me?”


Joy burst from Willow in an uncontrollable laugh.


“I asked first.”


“Oh,” Tara replied, a slow grin curving on her lips. “Yes. Absolutely yes.”


“Absolutely yes,” Willow agreed, and they all but threw themselves at each other, meeting to kiss in all their sodden glory.


When they parted, Willow scrambled to put her ring on Tara’s finger.


Tara really looked at it for the first time.


“This was my grandma’s.”


“Do you like it?” Willow asked with a hopeful lilt. “Your mom gave it to me.”


Tara’s lips parted in awe.


“It’s perfect,” she said as she looked up at Willow with glassy eyes. “So she knows? Is that why she’s been acting all weird?”


Willow could only nod.


“I came up to ask her blessing – NOT her permission – and she gave it to me.”


Tara’s eyes creased affectionately.


“When on earth did you manage that?”


“Do you remember that project I had to do on campus?” Willow asked sheepishly. “It was complete nonsense. I was literally speaking gibberish.”


The tension melted into a smile on Tara’s face.


“I couldn’t even tell.”


“Clearly!” Willow replied, and they both burst out in laughter.


Tara picked her ring box back up and took the ring out. Willow held out a shaky hand and exhaled slowly as it slid on her finger with a perfect fit.


“I can’t believe you made this. At the same place you made my earrings?”


Tara nodded.


“I actually went there to start a ring, and the earrings were like, um, practice? And see these?” she said, pointing out the little spots of iridescence. “I used the mix CDs we found that I made for you growing up.”


Willow’s breath caught.


“Oh, my god.”


Willow thought all the way back to the bench Tara had made in her senior year as a class project, inspired by Willow and her ‘hidden rainbow’. Now it sat on her finger as a promise to her love and the universe that they were in this together, forever.


She lifted her gaze to Tara and cupped her face, pulling her as close as possible.


“We’re going to be wives,” she said as if she almost couldn’t quite believe it.


“I’ll be yours, and you’ll be mine,” Tara confirmed, leaning their foreheads together.


Their loving gaze into each other’s eyes was thwarted by the sound of their squelching clothes. They looked at each other and burst out laughing.


“Willow,” Tara started to speak while gasping through laughs. “Willow, when we tell people how we got engaged, we’re going to have to say we did it covered in swamp water!”


“After being bitten by crabs!” Willow added.


“And you gave me a rotting tomato!”


They both collapsed in laughter, rolling around in the grass. A man walking his dog passed by and looked on at them strangely. Neither noticed nor cared, as they convulsed in hysterics until finally rolling into each other and calming down.


“I’ll follow you into any swamp,” Tara promised as she lightly caught her breath.


“I’ll try not to lead you into any more,” Willow promised back. “Thank you for coming in after me.”


Tara pressed a kiss to the bridge of Willow’s nose.


“Didn’t even have to think about it.”


They got themselves on their feet, both adjusting their rings as they stood and looking down at them with awe. Tara’s was a touch loose, but she didn’t mention it, given it was perfect as far as she was concerned. She could actually go to the jewelry studio and fix it herself, so it wasn’t a big deal.


“I think we need to get changed,” she said as her thighs squelched with every step.


“Yes,” Willow agreed as she wrung out her top.


Ruby’s would have to wait for another night when they were less wet and it was less on fire.


They each picked up their shoes but opted not to destroy them by trying to get into them.


“Hey, baby?” Willow said as they walked off the grass and back toward the bridge. “I don’t think I ever said Happy Birthday.”


Tara lifted Willow’s hand and kissed her knuckles.


“The happiest of birthdays, forevermore. Best…best birthday.”


Their fingers slipped together, and they practically frolicked their way home, getting many stares for being two soggy-bottomed, skipping souls who seemed completely unaware of anything but each other.


Neither had a key to the Maclay house on them, but a quick hand on the door revealed it was already open. They let themselves in, only lightly dripping now, and heard more chatter than usual from the living room.


They walked the few steps down the hall to look in. The conversation immediately stopped as everyone looked at them in shock.


“What the hell happened to you two?!” Kimberly asked in alarm from her perch on the arm of the couch.


Confusingly, Buffy, Xander and Anya were there alongside Sally and Jeff, but that didn’t put Willow or Tara off for a second.


Without even looking at each other, they held up their hands and spoke in perfect sync.


“We got engaged!”

[taranwillow4ever]

DIBS

I really enjoyed this. I can just imagine every bit of it.
Thanks for writing.

[Laragh]

taranwillow4ever —

DIBS

I really enjoyed this. I can just imagine every bit of it.
Thanks for writing.

Thank you so much! I really enjoyed writing it! It's been in my head for so long it was great to get in written down!

Thanks for your feedback

---

Update Directly Below

[Laragh]

---

Made For Each Other

---

Grow Old With Me
Let Us Share What We See
And Oh, The Best It Could Be
Just You And I

“We got engaged!”


There was the briefest of pauses as Kimberly’s eyes darted from Willow’s face to Tara’s, then to the rings glinting on their hands.


Her mouth slowly fell open.


“…oh my god.”


Then she started screaming and flailing like she’d been set on fire.


The only thing that told them otherwise, apart from the lack of flames, was the giant smile taking over her whole face.


She bounced over to Willow and Tara and nearly threw her arms around them before backing up at the last second when their clothes audibly squelched.


“What…” she started to ask before holding up her hands. “I don’t even want to know. Go upstairs and dry off. Leave your wet clothes in the bathroom. I’ll take care of them.”


Willow and Tara looked at each other and nodded before turning to go upstairs. About twenty seconds later, there was a distinct banging sound from the bathroom overhead.


Kimberly ignored it and turned to Jeff, clapping her hands together.


“Call people!”


“Who?” Jeff asked, at a slight loss, as he had not been at all privy to all of the planning and was still processing the announcement.


“Everybody! Message every group chat we’re in! We’ve got an engagement to celebrate!” Kimberly replied, closing her hands over her mouth for a moment with giddiness. “And get pizza! And wine!”


“And soda! And gummy worms!” Sally hoped her request would get bundled in with all the yelling. “Yeah! Our plan came together like butt cheeks!”


Upstairs, beneath the shower stream, Willow crowded Tara back against the shower wall, their slick bodies sliding together under the spray. There wasn’t a breath between them as their mouths met and water slipped down their faces.


Willow palmed Tara’s wet breast as Tara held her face and kissed her into a stupor. Willow’s hand started to creep downward, but just as her fingertips brushed Tara’s curls, she was pushed away.


Tara pulled just barely away from the kiss.


“Not consummating this engagement in the shower.”


Willow groaned in displeasure. Tara lightly nipped at her lips.


“You’re going to save it, and you’re going to give it to me like you’ve never given it to me before later on tonight. Understand?”


Willow’s eyelids fluttered heavily.


“Yes, ma’am.”


She stole another kiss, lingering for several long seconds before making herself pull back. She brought Tara under the spray and started to lather shampoo into her hair.


Tara tilted her head back accordingly and enjoyed being loved on in a different way.


By the time they’d thoroughly washed off the slime water, negotiated just enough groping to keep Willow from combusting until later, and given each other a quick blow-dry with a change of clothes, downstairs was poppin’.


It seemed like half the town had somehow squeezed into the house, packing the living room, kitchen, and backyard. The smell of melted cheese, wine, charcoal, and perfume drifted through the air while laughter spilled from every room.


The rain had cleared as quickly as it had arrived, leaving a warm, dry evening perfect for the fire pit to be lit up.


Jeff and Mr. Giles were arguing over which Southern rock band to play over the speakers. Kimberly and Joyce were pouring wine into glasses, and Donny was unpacking pizza and all kinds of other appetizers that had appeared from nowhere. Amy was nibbling on cheese.


They couldn’t see into the living room yet but could hear more voices beyond Buffy, Xander, and Anya, who they knew were already in there.


“Everyone is here,” Willow whispered at the foot of the stairs.


They both stared at the various people milling in and out.


“…everyone’s here,” Tara confirmed.


Willow’s brow creased.


“Were we longer than we thought up there?”


“You did spend ten minutes promising my breasts you’d see them later,” Tara whispered back. “And then twenty refusing to let me get dressed.”


“Okay, so a little longer than expected,” Willow replied with a furious blush. “But still. Your mom is fast. The whole neighborhood is here.”


“Except your parents,” Tara replied tentatively. “Should I have asked them for a blessing?”


“I’ve learned with my parents you don’t ask questions you don’t already know the answer to,” Willow replied quickly, squeezing Tara’s hand. “We’ll deal with it. Not tonight.”


Their rings lightly knocked together as their fingers linked, and they smiled at each other.


When they appeared in the doorway, the room noticed them in ripples. Conversations slowly stopped, one prompting another into silence with heads turning to see what was happening until all eyes were on them.


Then the cheering erupted. Clapping first, then whooping and hollering. Donny appeared with a party popper, making Willow duck in surprise when it went off by her ear.


They barely had time to take two steps before people descended on them, coming up to offer congratulations or pat them on the back. Since a lot of them were Kimberly and Jeff’s friends, they got offered several blessings and bids for officiants, which they all smiled politely at but just looked at each other with slight bewilderment.


Finally, Buffy, Xander, and Anya appeared in front of them, having pushed through the crowd.


Anya was the first to speak, shaking her head.


“Are you stupid? Love is a lie. Love is a lie, LOVE IS A LIE!”


She pushed straight past them and marched out. Xander winced, scratching the back of his head awkwardly while Buffy looked down at her shoes.


Tara glanced over her shoulder.


“Um…I think I should go after her. Baby, are you…?”


Willow nodded to Tara to go, kissing her cheek briefly before she left. She turned back to Buffy and Xander, who were just staring at her like the time she said she enjoyed homework.


“So…you were being serious about the whole proposing thing,” Xander said while Buffy just grabbed Willow’s wrist and pulled her left hand up to see.


“Are those real diamonds?”


“Yes,” Willow answered them both at once, her tone firm and chin lifted defiantly.


She took her hand back and waited, and after a moment, Xander let out what could only be described as a girlish squeal.


“Can I be your Best Man?”


“Do lesbians have Best Men?” Buffy asked, brow furrowing. “They probably have a Best Woman. In which case, the job should go to me.”


“Quit muscling in on the bestestness,” Xander replied with a clipped smile.


Willow looked between them slowly, almost suspiciously.


“…that’s it?”


Buffy frowned.


“What do you mean?”


“You’re not going to tell me I’m making a mistake? That I’m crazy or too young or throwing my life away?”


Buffy and Xander looked at each other and then back at Willow with the same loving smile.


“In this case misery does not love company,” Buffy said, closing her arms around Willow.


“Just because we’re fools in love doesn’t mean we want you to be,” Xander added, putting his arms around them both. “You and Tara are clearly MFEO.”


Two quizzical faces turned to him.


“Made for each other?” he asked in exasperation. “Does nobody else watch Grey’s Anatomy?”


He blushed down to his toes at the looks he got back.


“I mean, uh, get forced to watch it by their girlfriends when they really want to watch macho, manly, uh, monster truck rallies?”


Buffy and Willow just looked at him affectionately, but as they were basking in the love of friendship, Tara came hurrying over with the unmistakable expression of someone arriving with bad news she wished wasn’t funny.


“Um, Anya is currently searching for a stick pointy enough to scratch a certain word into your car.”


Xander’s eyes widened, and he made a beeline in the direction Tara had come from.


“What riled her up?” Willow asked, looking over her shoulder.


“She was pre-riled,” Buffy replied, frowning. “She saw us in the car on our way here. She thinks we’re…”


Willow’s nose scrunched.


“Oy.”


Buffy nodded solemnly.


“Yeah. She literally chased us here. Really, your engagement just interrupted her rile.”


“Jeez, the only one she hasn’t accused him of being with is Tara,” Willow said with a shake of her head.


Tara held her hand up shyly.


“She did tell me I shouldn’t go near him even if she did cut off his, um…”


Various faces of disgust were pulled, but Buffy smiled fondly.


“It’s kind of sweet. They have a miraculous love.”


Willow blinked.


Buffy shrugged.


“She genuinely thinks Xander is so amazing that every woman wants him. I would call that miraculous.”


“Sweet, sure,” Willow shared a brief, wide-eyed look with Tara. “Um, baby, get some food? I’m running on too much coffee and stale popcorn.”


“Sorry,” Buffy replied with a sigh. “The Doublemeat Palace only lets us take home the reject popcorn from the milkshakes. Those mini cheeseburgers look good, though. Better grab them before Dawn sees them. She loves the things.”


Willow’s eyes slowly widened as she watched Buffy leave.


“When she says reject popcorn, she means the stale ones they can’t sell, not what people leave leftover in the shake cups, right?” she said, desperately turning to Tara. “Right?!”


Tara patted the small of Willow’s back.


“Let’s just be glad it was the only rejection you had today.”


Outside, Xander had caught Anya as she rooted through the bushes for a sharp stick.


“Buffy’s one of my best friends. Nothing ever happened between us! I thought we’d been through this!”


“I thought you weren’t a cheater,” Anya retorted, snatching at a twig. “But I should have! You told me you would have kissed Willow back that day if she hadn’t caught you!”


Xander’s mouth dropped open.


“I never told you that!”


“Well, I overheard it!” Anya retorted.


“That’s such ancient history!” Xander pleaded. “We’re literally at Willow’s engagement! To a woman!”


Anya kicked a dirt pile in frustration. Xander tentatively approached and took her hands.


“There’s fault on both sides here.”


Anya looked up, tears springing into her eyes.


“Where was my fault in loving you with my whole heart?”


Xander felt his heart shatter into a million pieces. He opened his mouth, but nothing came out.


“Ahn…”


He reached up and pushed some hair out of her eye. Anya allowed it, but only just.


“Nothing happened with Cordelia.”


“You wanted it to,” Anya spat back, averting her eyes.


Xander sighed.


“It was a moment. A stupid, reckless moment. We never really got closure in high school and I just…”


“Oh, I remember high school.” Anya purposefully looked away. “The place where you rejected me several times until you wanted to get your dick wet.”


Xander looked wounded.


“Is that what you think?”


“Why wouldn’t I?” Anya snapped back.


Xander shook his head.


“Maybe we were never the most conventional couple, but Ahn…”


He reached up and cupped her cheek.


“You make me feel like I’ve never felt before in my life,” he said with quiet conviction. “Like a man.”


He leaned in and kissed her, and despite herself, she melted. Xander pulled away and rested their foreheads together.


“I just thought you might wanna know.”


Anya’s eyes became glassier with something other than tears, and she kissed him again.


Inside, Dawn was cooing over the rings, and Sally was bragging about keeping the secret and the planning of ‘Operation Mrs. Dorks’ to anyone who would listen.


Willow and Tara spent the evening almost entirely attached to one another. Every time one of them stood, the other followed. Whenever conversation separated them for more than a minute, one or the other would unconsciously seek the other’s hand again as though magnets had been hidden beneath their skin.


They accepted congratulations from neighbors they’d known since childhood and people whose names Willow immediately forgot in her excitement.


Mrs. Hennessy from three houses down insisted on hugging them both despite having met Willow perhaps four times in her entire life.


“About darn time,” she declared.


Tara and Willow shared a confused look.


“You’ve…been expecting this?” Tara asked.


She didn’t even think she’d seen Mrs. Hennessy since her days selling Girl Scout cookies.


The older woman laughed.


“Darlin’, the whole street has. I won the pot! I knew you wouldn’t make it all the way through college!”


Willow and Tara exchanged a look that was equal parts amused and horrified, but didn’t have much time to contemplate the fact that their nuptials had apparently been the subject of neighborhood betting pools before even more people surrounded them.


Elderly women pinched cheeks and declared them beautiful brides. Men they’d only ever exchanged polite waves with shook Willow’s hand hard enough to nearly dislocate it before awkwardly deciding Tara deserved one too, making Willow silently mouth ‘large with the butch’ smugly to Tara.


More than once, someone asked to see the rings. Willow happily held out her hand every single time, grinning as though she was the first person to ever get engaged. Tara blushed through every compliment before inevitably sneaking another glance at her own finger the moment everyone looked away.


From heartfelt congratulations to blessings invoking the Horned God to long stories about marriages that had lasted fifty years, they found themselves wrapped in more kindness than either of them knew what to do with. They settled for saying thank you, over and over again, until the words became hopelessly inadequate.


They dodged questions on wedding planning because they truly had no answers yet, and both were still fixed on the idea of marriage rather than the big party. Though as thoughts of white dresses and vows and the warm embrace of commitment were suggested, a wedding was starting to sound exciting too.


As the night drew on, Kimberly came into the living room and stepped up onto the raised hearth, tapping her glass.


Slowly, things quieted down, and attention turned to her.


“I would like to propose,” she said, earning a chuckle from some and a groan from her children. “A toast.”


She raised her glass.


“I have known these two girls their whole lives. I barely remember a time when one of them existed without the other.”


Tara looked at Willow with a smile and gently kissed her temple.


“I watched them grow up together,” Kimberly continued, her eyes creasing with affection and nostalgia. “Watched them navigate their childhood and their adolescence and whenever this became…more.”


There were glances in their direction, and both Willow’s and Tara’s eyes widened.


“Um, well…”


“It’s complicated…”


“It kinda just always…”


“Was.”


They looked at each other and nodded. Kimberly smirked.


“Well, I knew that when I caught them kissing in Tara’s bedroom when they were teenagers.”


“Okay.” Tara cleared her throat and blushed while everyone else laughed.


“I will admit there was a time that I never thought that that,” Kimberly said in an exaggerated tone. “Would lead to this. And a time when if you told me my only daughter was getting married before she was 40, I would be horrified.”


“Isn’t your mom 39?” Willow muttered to Tara.


“But I was relieved she wasn’t going to get pregnant at 16!”


“Ah,” Willow whispered, slotting the logic into place.


“All that to say…” Kimberly stopped and smiled warmly at Willow. “I could not imagine a better partner for my little girl.”


Willow met Kimberly’s eyes, swallowing deeply. Kimberly gave her the slyest of affectionate winks.


“Every parent spends their life hoping someone will love their child the way they deserve to be loved.”


She looked directly at Willow.


“I don’t have to hope anymore.”


Willow’s eyes grew glassy. Tara looked at the woman she’d just promised to spend her life with and squeezed their hands together. Willow looked over and blinked rapidly, refusing to let the tears form, and rested her head under Tara’s chin.


Kimberly inhaled softly and smiled tenderly before looking back at the crowd.


“Like I said, I’ve known her her whole life. I’ve seen how she’s stepped into herself and into your lives together, and I know that my Tara is safe with you.”


For a heartbeat, Willow couldn’t remember how to breathe. Somewhere deep inside, the fear that she’d never be good enough for Tara finally let go. She wasn’t the frightened girl who always feared she’d let Tara down anymore.


She was the woman Kimberly trusted with the most precious person in her world.


Willow held on tighter to Tara. A quiet certainty settled over her that no matter where life took them or how far apart they ever had to be, she would always feel Tara with her.


“I wish you every lifetime of happiness,” Kimberly said, her voice catching. “By Moon above and Earth below, may your love forever grow. To Willow and Tara!”


“Blessed be!” came from many in the room while all the others shared looks that asked, ‘Have we joined a cult’?


Kimberly smiled at Willow and Tara.


“Oh, and I almost forgot! We’ve gotten you a little engagement present.”


Both Willow’s and Tara’s eyebrows rose. Kimberly lifted her glass.


“We’ve gotten you a room in the Hidden Valley Hotel to spend the first night of your engagement tonight. It’s all set up for you to go tonight.”


Tara’s eyes widened.


“That’s the five-star hotel in Las Brujas.”


“Oh good,” Willow said with relief. “I thought you were sending us to some kind of salad-dressing-themed amusement park.”


Tara blushed slightly.


“I tried to get a job there once. They, um…declined when they saw I was from Sunnydale.”


Willow immediately began mentally adding another name to her ‘People Who Have Wronged Tara Maclay and The Ways I Will Destroy Them’ list. While she plotted with narrowed eyes, Tara met her mother’s gaze.


“That’s too much.”


“We all chipped in,” Kimberly replied softly.


“I get a discount through work,” Jeff added. “And I called in a favor to get you a good room.”


“I gave my pudding cup money!” Sally replied chirpily, then continued off a couple of confused looks. “Rich kids only get organic crap, so they pay more for the cheap stuff because it actually tastes good.”


“We told you to stop doing that,” Willow said tersely.


“I’m using it for good!” Sally protested. “I’m not the one getting to sleep on a big fancy bed!”


“There won’t be much sleeping!” A cackle came from who they were pretty sure was the Horned God lady.


There were many wide eyes, throats clearing, and coughs.


“Why won’t you sleep?” Dawn asked innocently.


“Yeah, why no sleeping? Sleeping is great!” Sally asked before scrunching up her face. “Gross, are you going to have sex?”


Dawn looked utterly shocked and red-faced while Joyce patted her hair, then her back forcefully.


“Maybe you should go upstairs, sweetie.”


“Why?” Sally asked, her brain trying to parse the uncomfortable looks.


Everyone avoided eye contact, and Sally put her hands on her hips.


“Hey, lesbians have sex too! Stop being so heterocentric!”


She nodded once, smugly.


Willow and Tara exchanged a look conveying the same thought that they never should have allowed her to read the Adrienne Rich books on their bookshelf.


Joyce covered Dawn’s ears, and Mr. Giles cleaned his glasses. Buffy took a long sip from her glass of ‘water’ and made covert glances out the window.


Jeff chuckled awkwardly and slapped his hands down on Sally’s shoulders from behind.


“Thank you, Sally, for your righteous defense of the LGBT community.”


“I didn’t say nothin’ bout most of those letters,” Sally muttered but understood the message to shut up by the tight squeeze on her shoulders followed by what could only be described as a fatherly pat.


“We’ll take the room if you don’t want it!” Anya’s voice called out as she and Xander appeared from somewhere suspiciously close to the hall closet with mussed hair. “I wonder what five-star sex is like.”


“Don’t need a bed for that,” Xander giggled in her ear.


“Oh my,” Joyce said, looking to Buffy to help with Dawn.


Buffy, eyes unfocused but keeping her posture, just shrugged.


Dawn was 13, and frankly, Buffy was sick of being treated like another parent.


“We graciously accept,” Willow said quickly, jumping off of Tara’s knee and pulling her up alongside her. “Um, I just want to say to Tara.”


She turned and smiled, tucking a loose strand of hair behind Tara’s ear.


“Happy Birthday. I hope you’re okay with spending all of the rest of them with me.”


Kimberly made a winding motion with her arm, and Jeff hurried off to the kitchen, returning with a cake and candles. Everyone started to sing.


“Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday, dear Tara. Happy birthday to you!”


Tara had genuinely forgotten it was her birthday.


Which, considering everything that had happened, somehow felt perfectly reasonable.


It felt like years since that morning when she’d woken up alone and feeling slightly abandoned. A different lifetime ago. She couldn’t even contemplate a world where she wasn’t Willow’s fiancée.


At least she knew now why everyone had been acting so funny.


She blew out her candles with a beaming smile and scooped some frosting on her finger to dab on Willow’s nose. She kissed it off and everyone ‘aww’d’.


Dawn ran up and asked to see the rings for what had to be the fifteenth time.


“Again?” Tara asked.


Willow held out her hand.


“It never gets old. Never.”


Dawn was wide-eyed with wonder.


“They’re so pretty.”


“Tara made mine,” Willow said proudly, never taking her gaze off Tara.


Dawn’s eyes shone as she glanced at Sally to the side.


“I want somebody to look at me like that someday.”


Sally’s nose scrunched with revulsion.


“Gross. You don’t have to live with it!”


Joyce came over to try and move Dawn away, but she shrugged it off.


“It’s okay. I do know about this stuff. Besides, it’s all kinda romantic.”


Sally made a gagging motion, and Dawn rolled her eyes but accepted an invitation to go change up the musical playlist. Joyce shook her head but then turned her smile back around.


“You know, Willow, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so happy.”


“Quite,” Mr. Giles said, having appeared beside her. “Though our acquaintance is a relatively recent one, it is clear to see the devotion between you two.”


“Thank you, Mrs. Summers,” Tara replied easily. “Thank you, Mr. Giles. That means a lot.”


“Yeah, thank you.” Willow bobbed her head in agreement. “It’s nice that everyone else can see it too.”


Joyce wandered over beside Buffy, who was quietly watching Willow and Tara from across the room.


“You okay?”


Buffy felt her phone vibrate in her pocket and smiled without looking away.


“Yeah.”


Joyce followed her gaze.


“You know…when we moved here, I worried about you making friends.”


Buffy gave a small snort.


“Because I kept trying to solve everything with my fists?”


Joyce’s smile was wry.


“Among other things.”


They both stared ahead for a moment before Joyce nodded toward Willow.


“I’m glad you found her.”


Buffy looked across the room again as Willow laughed at something Tara whispered.


“Mmm.”


Joyce put her arms around Buffy’s shoulder.


“You’ll have that someday. When it’s right.”


Buffy took another drink.


“Right. When it’s…right.”


Willow and Tara drifted back to the armchair as naturally as breathing, folding into each other as though there had never been another way to sit. Around them, the party continued. People laughed, glasses clinked, someone argued about the music, but it all blurred into warm background noise.


Willow found herself reaching for things with her left hand whenever possible. Brushing stray hair behind her ear. Picking up her drink. Accepting another slice of pizza.


Entirely by coincidence, of course.


Every few minutes, Tara would glance down at her ring and smile to herself, as though she’d forgotten it was there only to fall in love with it all over again.


Kimberly caught sight of them more than once from across the room. Every time, she’d stop whatever conversation she was having for just a second, smiling quietly to herself before carrying on.


Finally, when everyone had said their piece, they found themselves still curled up in the chair with neither of them feeling the need to say anything. Willow traced the edge of Tara’s engagement ring with her thumb. Tara intertwined their fingers.


They didn’t need words.


One heart.


One mind.


One soul.


MFEO.

[Will's redemption]

I just wanted to post a late feedback to the last chapter and now I see you've updated the newest chapter already. I don't have time to read it now.

Let me just say: yay to the mutual proposal after some slapstick-like events with the rotten tomato (remarkable that its stem did hold it all the time Willow carried it... ), them both having to wade through a swamp pond and being bitten by crabs (lucky for them that there are no piranhas in california! ).

The engagement ring Tara made herself sounds (reads?) really remarkable. How sweet that she carried it with her for weeks just in case the "perfect moment" for a proposal arrived, and lucky that she thought about taking her purse with her when she "stormed of" earlier.

I love that Tara came to this realization while thinking on that park bench:

“Because you give your all to me,” Tara continued. “And one funky day when there’s a lot going on doesn’t change that. And I think…I forgot something today, too.”


Willow frowned slightly. Tara smiled.


“I spent so much of today mourning the hours we’d lost that I forgot to look at the hours we still had. I don’t think I want to do that anymore.

Willow letting go of the urge to plan the rest of that day but just enjoy the present moments with Tara was also huge:

But she decided to do something different from her usual pattern. She wouldn’t worry. She wouldn’t feel guilty about the mistakes she’d made or the things that were out of her control.


Every instinct she had wanted to start solving again. Replace the flowers. Find another restaurant. Salvage the candles. Salvage the day.


For once, she ignored every single one of those instincts.


Because none of those things were what Tara had ever asked for.


She was going for a walk with her love, and that was enough for right now.

And then the realization that they don't have to wait for the "perfect" moment but just seize and make the best of the moments together:

“I’ve been carrying this around for weeks, waiting for…”


She stopped, her voice tightening with emotion.


“Waiting for the perfect moment.”


Tears sprang to Willow’s eyes and moments later, the same happened to Tara.


“You keep trying to build the perfect moment for me, Willow. But the moments I cherish most are always the ones where we’re just…us. I should have known there wouldn’t be a single perfect moment, because every moment is perfect. They just need to have you in them.”


She smiled through watery eyes.


“Every moment that I have with you brings me joy or brings me growth or lets me know that nothing I do is truly alone. I have someone who fought for me. I have someone who continues fighting for me. I have a partner by my side. And I want to be your partner forever.”


She lifted her box almost shyly.


“Will you marry me?”


Joy burst from Willow in an uncontrollable laugh.


“I asked first.”


“Oh,” Tara replied, a slow grin curving on her lips. “Yes. Absolutely yes.”


“Absolutely yes,” Willow agreed, and they all but threw themselves at each other, meeting to kiss in all their sodden glory.

AWWWW!

“Hey, baby?” Willow said as they walked off the grass and back toward the bridge. “I don’t think I ever said Happy Birthday.”


Tara lifted Willow’s hand and kissed her knuckles.


“The happiest of birthdays, forevermore. Best…best birthday.”

Hard to top despite all the chaos and the bad mood Tara was in while waiting for Willow.

They walked the few steps down the hall to look in. The conversation immediately stopped as everyone looked at them in shock.


“What the hell happened to you two?!” Kimberly asked in alarm from her perch on the arm of the couch.


Confusingly, Buffy, Xander and Anya were there alongside Sally and Jeff, but that didn’t put Willow or Tara off for a second.


Without even looking at each other, they held up their hands and spoke in perfect sync.


“We got engaged!”

Yay, party time (after the mandatory shower)!

[Laragh]

Will's redemption —

I just wanted to post a late feedback to the last chapter and now I see you've updated the newest chapter already. I don't have time to read it now.

Let me just say: yay to the mutual proposal after some slapstick-like events with the rotten tomato (remarkable that its stem did hold it all the time Willow carried it... ), them both having to wade through a swamp pond and being bitten by crabs (lucky for them that there are no piranhas in california! ).

You know I had to have it be ridiculous first

The engagement ring Tara made herself sounds (reads?) really remarkable. How sweet that she carried it with her for weeks just in case the "perfect moment" for a proposal arrived, and lucky that she thought about taking her purse with her when she "stormed of" earlier.

I had a lot of fun designing the ring! I wanted it to be uniquely them and I've had this recurring theme of finding prisms so when I realized I wanted that to be in the ring I knew it was going to have to be specially designed and then I realized in was definitely in Tara's remit to make it herself with a little help.

I love that Tara came to this realization while thinking on that park bench:

I think a lot of people waste time looking back when they could look forward <3

Willow letting go of the urge to plan the rest of that day but just enjoy the present moments with Tara was also huge:

I do love some mutual growth!

And then the realization that they don't have to wait for the "perfect" moment but just seize and make the best of the moments together:

A foundation for a good marriage!

Hard to top despite all the chaos and the bad mood Tara was in while waiting for Willow.

If anything, the contrast makes the high even better!

Yay, party time (after the mandatory shower)!

You read my mind

Thanks so much for your feedback!

---

Update Directly Below

[Laragh]

---

Intertwined

---

Forever's Gonna Start Tonight

At the end of the night, Tara threw a few things into an overnight bag while Willow went out to get the Vespa.


They weren’t planning on wearing much, so it was a pretty simple bag to pack.


As Willow tossed Tara a helmet, she spotted another bike in the shadows, waiting. He looked vaguely familiar, but he was shadowed under a tree, and she didn’t connect it to the bike she’d seen Buffy speed off on the night before.


“Hey, who’s the guy on the bike?”


“Must be one of Donny’s friends,” Tara replied with a shrug and closed the strap on her helmet.


She hopped on the back and wrapped her arms around Willow’s midsection. As they sped past the man on the bike, something about him tugged at Tara’s memory before a small speed bump resettled her and she leaned in to rest her chin on Willow’s shoulder.


The hotel was just under ten miles away, on the outskirts leading into the town of Las Brujas. Tara had passed it every day as she traveled to school or work in the town but had never gone beyond the gates.


‘Pueblo de Nuestra Señora de las Brujas del Valle Escondido’, as the town had been known on its founding in the late eighteenth century, began as a small farming community centered around a chapel dedicated to the Virgin Mary. The unusual “de las Brujas” portion of the name originated from a group of women who lived on the outskirts of the settlement who were midwives, herbalists, healers, and widows who possessed practical knowledge of medicine, childbirth, and local plants.


Tara only learned of all of this later when her mom had gotten back into the Wiccan thing. Kimberly had found it especially amusing that her spiritual ancestors might have lived so close to home.


According to local legend, a soldier passing through the valley in the early 1800s jokingly referred to them as las brujas (‘the witches’) after one of the women successfully treated an illness that had baffled the mission doctor. The nickname spread and eventually became attached to the settlement itself.


Over time, the term lost its negative connotations. The women became celebrated as pioneers who helped sustain the community through droughts, epidemics, and difficult harvests. By the time California became part of the United States, the town’s residents had embraced the name as part of their heritage, and it stuck to this day.


A sign at the town’s entrance said, ‘If you’re fortunate enough to reach Las Brujas, you’ll never be left without a welcome’, an expression apparently said by the traveling soldier as he moved east.


The Hidden Valley Hotel played on the original town’s name. Nestled among vineyards and rolling hills, it was only built in the early 2000s but made you believe it was built much earlier. They leaned into the local folklore heavily, calling the spa ‘The Healers’ Garden’ and their signature restaurant ‘Valle Escondido’. Even the logo incorporated three stylized women standing beneath an oak tree, representing the legendary founders.


Tara stared out the visor of her helmet as the hotel came into view, illuminated by carefully placed lanterns to create a perfect mellow glow.


“Wow.”


The estate sat atop a gentle rise overlooking the valley, its cream-colored walls and red tile roofs just visible in the light. Water trickled from a series of stone fountains near the entrance, and the landscaping seemed designed to glow softly in the night.


Willow seemed to agree as she pulled the Vespa up in one of the small parking spots outside the entrance.


“Okay, remind me why we don’t stay at places like this all the time?”


“Because we’re not what you might call, um, Richy McRichersons?” Tara suggested.


Willow nodded once.


“Right. That.”


Their hands came together like magnets; fingers twining as they headed toward the quiet entrance together.


At the front desk, there was a paraphrase of the town’s motto framed: ‘No traveler leaves Las Brujas without finding rest.’


It was easy to miss among the opulent marble and gold décor, though. Dark wooden beams supported the soaring ceiling, while massive stone fireplaces anchored either side of the room. Fresh flowers filled oversized arrangements near the reception desk. Somewhere nearby, soft piano music drifted through hidden speakers.


At this hour, most of the guests had already retired for the evening, so the lobby held only a handful of people: a couple lingering over drinks in the lounge and a single man in a suit crossing toward the elevators. The woman behind the front desk greeted them warmly.


“Good evening, Ms. Rosenberg, Ms. Maclay. Welcome to The Hidden Valley Hotel. You have our utmost congratulations.”


Willow blinked.


“Okay, that’s weirdly impressive.”


The receptionist smiled knowingly.


“We try.”


Within minutes, the simple backpack was taken from Tara’s shoulders, and their room keys were prepared. The receptionist briefly explained the breakfast area, the spa amenities, and the location of the restaurant and bar before handing over two elegant key cards embossed with the hotel’s logo.


“I believe you’re in the Founders Suite. Elevator to your left.”


“The Founders Suite?” Willow repeated.


Tara’s eyebrows rose.


Willow turned to her.


“Did we accidentally become fancy?”


“It would appear so,” Tara replied with her lips lifting on one side. “Or at least our family is trying to make us feel like it for a night.”


They followed a bell attendant through the lobby and into a quieter wing of the hotel. The lighting in the hallways was subdued and ambient, decorated with framed black-and-white photographs of early Las Brujas and landscapes of the surrounding valley.


The elevator opened onto the top floor.


As they walked down the corridor, thick carpeting muted every footstep. The entire place seemed wrapped in a peaceful silence that felt worlds away from responsibilities, needy friends, or biting green crabs.


The attendant opened a pair of double doors and stepped aside.


The suite was enormous.


A sitting room spread out before them, complete with a stone fireplace, floor-to-ceiling windows, and a private terrace overlooking the valley. Beyond that lay a bedroom dominated by a king-sized bed piled high with pillows. Warm lamplight reflected off polished wood furniture and soft cream-colored walls.


For a moment neither Willow nor Tara spoke.


They had thought spending the night in Ojai for Tara’s last birthday had been luxurious, but this was utterly decadent.


The attendant finished his brief explanation of the room’s features, wished them a pleasant stay, and departed.


The door clicked shut behind him.


Willow made a slow turn, taking everything in.


“They definitely booked the wrong room.”


Tara laughed.


“No, they definitely booked the right room. And if they didn’t, I say we say nothing.”


Willow wandered around the suite almost cautiously, running her fingers over the carved wooden bedpost.


“This bed is bigger than our apartment.”


Tara wrapped a hand around a bedpost and leaned against it.


“It’s definitely bigger than our bedroom.”


Willow flopped backwards experimentally.


“Oh no.”


Amusement flickered in Tara’s eyes.


“What?”


“We’re never leaving,” Willow said, rolling over and hugging the mattress. “We’re going to have to live here and die here and get married here.”


She stood and crossed to the windows, pulling back the curtains. Below them, the lights of Las Brujas sparkled across the valley floor like scattered stars.


After a moment, Tara joined her.


Neither spoke.


After the long day of emotional rollercoasters, the quiet luxury of the hotel, and the beauty of the view settled around them all at once.


Finally, Willow slipped an arm around Tara’s waist.


“Best engagement present ever.”


Tara rested her head against Willow’s shoulder as they looked out over the sleeping town.


“Second best.”


Willow looked down at their joined hands. The rings caught the light from the valley below. She turned Tara’s hand over reverently, running her thumb over the ruby.


“You actually said yes.”


Tara’s eyes bounced with love and affection.


“So did you,” she replied, turning her head in to press a gentle kiss to Willow’s neck. “My soon-to-be wife.”


Willow drew back just enough to meet Tara’s eye, holding her at arm’s length.


“I like that.”


Tara ducked her head, and a crooked grin spread across her lips.


“Oh yeah?”


She dropped two fingers against Willow’s collarbone, letting her hand slide up and around Willow’s neck.


“See anything else you like?”


She pulled Willow’s neck forward so they were nose to nose.


“Everything,” Willow answered before licking her lips and pulling Tara into a kiss.


They stumbled back into the room and fell onto the couch. Willow landed on top of Tara and popped the buttons on her shirt until the swell of Tara’s breasts beneath her bra came into view. With one button left at the bottom, she dropped her head into Tara’s chest and peppered eager kisses as her body rushed with a new wave of desire, drawn deeper into a love that seemed to have no end.


The last button slipped free with a couple of threads pulled loose in the process, and Willow pulled Tara’s shirt back over both shoulders, baring the smooth sweep of her upper chest. Dipping her head to press kisses into the little crooks and divots around Tara’s collarbone, Willow pushed the fabric free from Tara’s skin and delighted in the flush she saw grace Tara’s chest.


Her breath was already coming in shorter hitches as Tara lifted Willow’s face and searched her for a long moment, exchanging something words couldn’t, before crushing their lips together again. The kiss was somehow fierce and tender all at once, as if every brush of tongue was going to carry them to new depths.


And depths were where Willow needed to be, and quickly. She fumbled with Tara’s belt until it snapped free and she fully yanked it through the belt loops where it made a satisfying smack against the couch.


Willow looked at it in surprise, and her eyes widened even further when Tara offered her wrists, joined at the underside, without hesitation.


Willow took the belt and slowly wrapped it around Tara’s wrists, loose at first and then pulling the end through the loop so it rested comfortably. She raised Tara’s bound arms overhead while lowering herself until their noses touched again.


Fingertips brushed lightly down Tara’s stretched arm, making her shiver.


Willow reached between them, flicking the button on Tara’s jeans open. The zipper gave way and slid open as her hand slipped into Tara’s jeans and pressed into the front of her underwear, feeling wetness seep through the material.


Tara’s lips parted as Willow’s fingers did the same to her below. Willow refused to break eye contact, and right as she took Tara, settling inside her with a heady tenderness, Tara’s hands tried to move to pull her in more but were caught deliciously together.


Instead, the joined wrists moved over Willow’s head and tugged her down at the neck, forcing their mouths together again.


Willow moved in Tara like the first light of dawn, from the faintest blush to brilliant morning. It was a quick release, and yet they both felt the pull that went deeper, like roots growing around their ankles and pulling them all the way through floors and ground and earthing them to something that wasn’t even describable.


This intense, palpitating feeling didn’t break…even when they accidentally rolled with a thud onto the floor. Tara’s trapped arms moved awkwardly, lifted above her head, and Willow was quick to free her.


With loose fingers, Tara pushed her own jeans down a few inches more than what had come down from the friction. Willow took her hand out from Tara’s underwear, lifting it close to her face where she let her tongue lick her index finger.


Tara watched her, eyes growing darker, then swung her legs up and around so she was sitting in Willow’s lap. She hooked her fingers into the openings on either side of Willow’s shirt and pulled so each metal button popped open and exposed her chest.


Without breaking eye contact, she cupped Willow’s breasts through her bra and gave just enough pressure to make Willow’s eyelids flutter. When she felt Willow’s nipples harden under her touch, she took her hands away to a displeased groan.


Tara tilted Willow’s chin up with a single finger, kissed her square on the mouth, and took hold of either side of her shirt, pulling Willow upright with her. She walked them back to the bed, pushed Willow down onto the bed, the mattress bouncing lightly beneath her.


Willow elbow-walked back to the lusciously soft pillows with Tara crawling over her and their eyes never parting. Tara knocked Willow’s legs open with her knee and pressed her thigh between them, causing a hitched breath to splutter from Willow as the seam hit just so.


Tara only let her enjoy it for a second though before she roughly tugged Willow’s jeans off her legs, hooking a finger into the front of her panties to bring them down together.


Willow’s belt was just a piece of silk fabric, tied in a bow at the front, but Tara still whipped it through the loops with all the confidence of a cowgirl.


She curved it through her fingers and let it lightly caress Willow’s bare thigh, now glistening with spilled arousal.


“You think you’re the only one who knows how to use one of these?” Tara asked evocatively.


Willow’s mouth just opened and closed wordlessly. Tara’s grin curled up on one side.


“Get the rest of your clothes off in the next three seconds, and I’ll give you a surprise.”


Willow did it in two.


Granted, it was just her bra and already-opened top, but it was still impressive.


Tara smirked and held the belt in both hands, stretching the fabric between them. She swayed evocatively from on top of Willow and let the fabric caress Willow’s left arm, down to her wrist.


Keeping her balance with her knees on either side of Willow’s hips, she reached down and guided the fabric beneath their hands. She slid her right hand into Willow’s left, threading their fingers together until their palms met.


For a moment she simply held on, testing the fit, then used her free left hand to begin wrapping the silk around their joined wrists. The smooth fabric whispered against their skin as she wound it once, then twice, leaving enough slack that she could still work the knot.


It was awkward with their fingers interlocked, and twice she had to shift her grip and catch the loose end before it slipped free. Eventually she pinned the wraps in place with her thumb, fed one end of the silk beneath the layers, and drew it through. The knot tightened gradually as she pulled, drawing their wrists together without squeezing.


Willow watched, rapt with fascination and arousal.


Only when Tara was satisfied did she release her left hand from the knot. Their fingers remained intertwined, her right hand bound securely to Willow’s left by the band of silk. The connection held on its own, the knot doing the work that her grip no longer needed to.


“How…” was all she could ask, finally tearing her attention from their bound hands to Tara.


“You forget how long I’ve been making clothes,” Tara replied with a mysterious raise of her eyebrows. “I have all kinds of skills…”


She held Willow there, never looking away, as she started to move lower, their fingers joined even as their wrists strained. Her eyelids only dropped when her lips kissed Willow’s mound, and the push of Willow’s hips toward her mouth was all the encouragement she needed to show off every one of those skills.


Willow’s head arched into the pillows as Tara’s tongue delved between her legs, working her body as only Tara could. She built her up until she was right at the cusp of releasing and then fell back, denying her the basic pleasure.


Just when she was sure Willow couldn’t take another second, she rose onto one arm and hovered above Willow once more.


Unable to resist those glistening lips, Willow pulled Tara into a messy, sloppy kiss. Tara lifted their joined hands at an angle above their heads and slowly lowered her body on top of Willow’s.


Willow couldn’t bear the scratch of Tara’s underwear against her hot skin, so she used her foot to push her panties down past her knees and unhooked her bra with her free hand. The silk belt kept it from slipping completely off, leaving it hanging loosely from Tara’s arm.


With her weight softly distributed half on Willow and half on the bed, Tara lifted her free left hand and hovered for just a moment before lowering it.


Willow twisted her hips in anticipation.


“I love that you’re ambifucktrous–ohhhh.”


Her whole body tensed as Tara entered her, lingering there as pleasure rolled through her, like a small preview of what was to come.


“Open your eyes,” Tara asked, or rather commanded, but in the softest voice that made Willow feel held and secure and utterly submissive.


Willow obeyed, nearly coming on the spot at the dark blue stare waiting for her. Tara began moving her fingers, and Willow felt a quake start in her toes and tremble up her thighs.


“Baby…”


The word fell from her mouth like a prayer, called out to the universe yet only heard between them.


Tara brought Willow to the edge one last time, thrusting and stretching her fingers just right, just how Willow liked, like only she knew. Her eyelids grew heavy, but she fought the urge to let them close until Tara’s palm brushed against her clit and the dam erupted.


She was sure she left the room, the building, the stratosphere; that she exploded across the universe before being returned to her body lovingly tethered by Tara, whose gentle touch guided her back to herself, their fingers tight in each other and hearts beating in sync.


She blinked heavily as the colors swirled back into normal vision. Tara placed a kiss against her cheek, which Willow turned into to allow their lips to meet.


“I wanna be your forever,” she whispered into Tara’s kiss.


“You are,” Tara whispered back.


Neither of them moved.


The room had fallen completely silent again except for their breathing and the faint hum of the air conditioning somewhere overhead.


Tara simply smiled, resting her forehead against Willow’s. More words somehow felt too enormous to rush past. They’d come so far from being two scared girls falling in love without knowing how they could be together.


But she couldn’t wait to say those words in front of all of their family and friends and promise Willow just that: forever.


Willow lazily traced circles across Tara’s stomach.


Tara rested two fingers against Willow’s engagement ring, turning it a fraction.


“Looks good on you.”


Willow smiled without opening her eyes.


“You look good on me.”


Willow stretched her body luxuriously, and Tara gently slipped out of her, resting her hand on Willow’s thigh for a moment before reaching up to free their hands from each other.


Even when freed, their fingers stayed interlocked as Tara curled into Willow’s side.


“I wanna know about all of the plans you had to propose to me.”


“Oy,” Willow chuckled, exhaling softly. “It was supposed to be simple.”


“When does ‘Willow’ and ‘simple’ go together?” Tara asked wryly.


Willow’s arm was cramping slightly, but she didn’t dare move it from above their heads.


“We were supposed to have a nice meal, go for a nice walk, and when I brought you home it was supposed to spell out ‘Will You Marry Me?’ in candles.”


“Candles?” Tara asked softly.


“Extra-flamey ones,” Willow confirmed. “Tara, we have soooo many candles! We’ll still be burning them on our 50th wedding anniversary.”


Warmth spread across Tara’s face at the idea, and she could just picture them as little old ladies still burning them.


“Did you have backup plans?”


Willow looked at her incredulously.


“Of course, I did, Tara. Seven.”


“Seven?!” Tara asked, her eyes bugging slightly.


Willow nodded definitively.


“There were flowcharts. I got to teach Sally about augmented transition networks.”


Tara laughed.


“Of course there was.”


Willow shook her head.


“Yet somehow I still never factored in rain.”


Her voice was raspy, so Tara rolled off the bed to get water from the mini fridge. Tara’s bra finally fell to the floor, and Willow mourned their broken grasp for a moment but did appreciate getting to lower her arm to a more natural position. She was quickly rewarded, though, as she got to watch Tara’s butt sway as she walked toward the mini fridge near the door.


For a second she wasn’t looking at the hotel room at all.


She was halfway across the world again, back in Auckland after the very first time they’d ‘tied themselves together’.


Willow giggled as she was hit with how far they had come, all encapsulated in the shapely curve of Tara’s ass.


Tara returned to bed with the bottle of water, grinning.


“What’s so funny?”


She unscrewed the lid and offered it to Willow. Willow took a long glug, not realizing how thirsty she was until the water hit her lips.


“I just remembered. Right after we um…did this for the first time. In Auckland? I told you to put the do not disturb sign on the door…but only because I liked the look of you walking away.”


Tara feigned mock offense.


“Willow Rosenberg, are you saying you orchestrated a plot to see my butt wiggle?”


“Entirely,” Willow replied with a grin of her own. “And guess what? I’m going to keep doing it for the rest of my life.”


Their lips met again like an object settling into equilibrium, and Tara lifted her hand to cup Willow’s cheek. As she caressed Willow’s skin, something felt subtly wrong. She moved her hand and then opened her eyes, noticing the issue immediately.


“Where’s my ring?”


She turned her hand over as if it might appear on the other side.


“Where’s my ring?!” she repeated as she jumped off the bed.


“Don’t panic,” Willow said, sitting up sharply intending to help look, but instead fell back against the headboard. “Oof!”


Tara held her hands up, alarmed.


“What?”


Willow winced.


“I think I have a working hypothesis on where the ring is.”


For a moment Tara just stared, then slowly realization dawned.


“Oh my god.”


Heat rushed into Tara’s cheeks as she closed her eyes for a second, torn between mortification and laughter.


She opened them again.


“Do you…want me to…”


Willow laughed somewhat inelegantly.


“Please. I’d much rather it be on your finger.”


Tara scooted a little closer, all traces of amusement disappearing again. She rested a hand on Willow’s knee.


“Tell me if I hurt you, okay?”


Willow nodded.


Tara gently explored with one finger until metal brushed against her fingertip. She looked visibly relieved.


“Okay. Got it. I’m taking it out now, okay?”


Tara slid the ring straight onto her finger, relief washing over her face.


“At least it’s rounded,” Willow said, then offered a small grin. “Now I really have left my own mark on it.”


Tara covered her mouth to stifle a laugh and fell back down on the bed beside Willow.


“God, this is comfortable.”


Willow turned her head toward Tara and simply drank her in, seeing her entire future held in the curve of Tara’s smile.


“That’s it. That’s all I want. To make you comfortable for the rest of our lives. To be your soft place to land. To make you feel like the wonderful woman you are.”


She moved onto her forearms above Tara and lingered, waiting until Tara looked back at her.


When Tara’s lids grew heavy with arousal, Willow lowered her head and pressed kisses to Tara’s throat, moving decidedly downward.


“Starting right now…”

[Will's redemption]

You're once again early, Laragh!

I will savour this newest chapter to read on my trainride home from work.

But I still get to claim dibs for last weeks chapter!

Tara pulled just barely away from the kiss.


“Not consummating this engagement in the shower.”


Willow groaned in displeasure. Tara lightly nipped at her lips.


“You’re going to save it, and you’re going to give it to me like you’ve never given it to me before later on tonight. Understand?”


Willow’s eyelids fluttered heavily.


“Yes, ma’am.”

Now that's the right challenge for Willow! Lucky for them that they can "consummmate" their engagement in a luxury hotel suite where they can be as loud as they want...

“Were we longer than we thought up there?”


“You did spend ten minutes promising my breasts you’d see them later,” Tara whispered back. “And then twenty refusing to let me get dressed.”


“Okay, so a little longer than expected,” Willow replied with a furious blush.

Willow is a breastgirl forever!

The whole neighborhood is here.”


“Except your parents,” Tara replied tentatively. “Should I have asked them for a blessing?”


“I’ve learned with my parents you don’t ask questions you don’t already know the answer to,” Willow replied quickly, squeezing Tara’s hand. “We’ll deal with it. Not tonight.”

I hope Willow's parents are once again not at home, because it would be pretty akward if they noticed the big party at the Maclay house and found out later that this was the engagemnet party for their daughter and her fiance.

She took her hand back and waited, and after a moment, Xander let out what could only be described as a girlish squeal.


“Can I be your Best Man?”


“Do lesbians have Best Men?” Buffy asked, brow furrowing. “They probably have a Best Woman. In which case, the job should go to me.”


“Quit muscling in on the bestestness,” Xander replied with a clipped smile.


Willow looked between them slowly, almost suspiciously.


“…that’s it?”


Buffy frowned.


“What do you mean?”


“You’re not going to tell me I’m making a mistake? That I’m crazy or too young or throwing my life away?”


Buffy and Xander looked at each other and then back at Willow with the same loving smile.


“In this case misery does not love company,” Buffy said, closing her arms around Willow.


“Just because we’re fools in love doesn’t mean we want you to be,” Xander added, putting his arms around them both. “You and Tara are clearly MFEO.”


Two quizzical faces turned to him.


“Made for each other?” he asked in exasperation.

AWWW! I trusted in Xander and Buffy to be happy for Willow and Tara, and they didn't disappoint.

“Jeez, the only one she hasn’t accused him of being with is Tara,” Willow said with a shake of her head.


Tara held her hand up shyly.


“She did tell me I shouldn’t go near him even if she did cut off his, um…”


Various faces of disgust were pulled, but Buffy smiled fondly.


“It’s kind of sweet. They have a miraculous love.”


Willow blinked.


Buffy shrugged.


“She genuinely thinks Xander is so amazing that every woman wants him. I would call that miraculous.”

Buffy is right, it is astonishing that Anya expects every woman, no matter her relationship status or sexual orientation, to fall for and pursue Xander.

“Maybe we were never the most conventional couple, but Ahn…”


He reached up and cupped her cheek.


“You make me feel like I’ve never felt before in my life,” he said with quiet conviction. “Like a man.”


He leaned in and kissed her, and despite herself, she melted. Xander pulled away and rested their foreheads together.


“I just thought you might wanna know.”


Anya’s eyes became glassier with something other than tears, and she kissed him again.

“We’ll take the room if you don’t want it!” Anya’s voice called out as she and Xander appeared from somewhere suspiciously close to the hall closet with mussed hair. “I wonder what five-star sex is like.”


“Don’t need a bed for that,” Xander giggled in her ear.

I'm glad that Xander and Anya made up! I hope their next breakup will happen after Willow's and Tara's wedding so there will be no heartache for Xander and Anya (and revenge plotting from Anya) during the preparations and the wedding itself.

“All that to say…” Kimberly stopped and smiled warmly at Willow. “I could not imagine a better partner for my little girl.”


Willow met Kimberly’s eyes, swallowing deeply. Kimberly gave her the slyest of affectionate winks.


“Every parent spends their life hoping someone will love their child the way they deserve to be loved.”


She looked directly at Willow.


“I don’t have to hope anymore.”


Willow’s eyes grew glassy. Tara looked at the woman she’d just promised to spend her life with and squeezed their hands together. Willow looked over and blinked rapidly, refusing to let the tears form, and rested her head under Tara’s chin.


Kimberly inhaled softly and smiled tenderly before looking back at the crowd.


“Like I said, I’ve known her her whole life. I’ve seen how she’s stepped into herself and into your lives together, and I know that my Tara is safe with you.”


For a heartbeat, Willow couldn’t remember how to breathe. Somewhere deep inside, the fear that she’d never be good enough for Tara finally let go. She wasn’t the frightened girl who always feared she’d let Tara down anymore.


She was the woman Kimberly trusted with the most precious person in her world.

AWWW, I love how Kimberly proclaimed her trust in Willow to love, protect and care for Tara for the rest of their lives in front of the whole crowd, silencing Willow's self doubts!

Everyone avoided eye contact, and Sally put her hands on her hips.


“Hey, lesbians have sex too! Stop being so heterocentric!”


She nodded once, smugly.

Go Sally!

Dawn’s eyes shone as she glanced at Sally to the side.


“I want somebody to look at me like that someday.”


Sally’s nose scrunched with revulsion.


“Gross. You don’t have to live with it!”


Joyce came over to try and move Dawn away, but she shrugged it off.


“It’s okay. I do know about this stuff. Besides, it’s all kinda romantic.”

Awww, go Dawn! I hope that Dawn will stay a Willow - Tara- shipper forever.

Finally, when everyone had said their piece, they found themselves still curled up in the chair with neither of them feeling the need to say anything. Willow traced the edge of Tara’s engagement ring with her thumb. Tara intertwined their fingers.


They didn’t need words.


One heart.


One mind.


One soul.


MFEO.