Fic: Angels and Goddesses

[Tiggrscorpio]

Oh Athame, that was simply lovely. Wonderful behind the scene glimpses of "Superstar" and WTWTA. I'm so delighted to see the return of this wonderful story.



I had no idea I would be invited to the Kitten mansion. I must remember to dress better for my next visit, unless of course I decide to play volleyball.



Glad your back!

*****

She's my everything!

[The Rose24]

Excellent. I was wondering if W/T talked about what happened after that incident. Another thing the WB robbed us of.

Tara: My heart doesn't stutter.

Tara: Willow, I got so lost.
Willow: I found you. I will always find you.

Willow: Hi, um Tara. I was wondering maybe you want to go out some time for coffee? food? Kisses and gay love?

[Jennpurr]

Dear God. WOW...



It's hot in here. I never thought just kissing could leave me so... um... hot. That was awesome, Athame. Can't wait for tomorrow now. I'm going to have to go back and read that again.



So beautiful.



Thanks Athame.

Jen

-----------------------------------


"Alyson Hannigan is a frickin' amazing kisser."Amber Benson

[eccentrictulip]

woo! a little steam, anyone? i came home from work and there were two lovely updates waiting for me i don't think i've ever seen such a well written kiss, athame!!!! well done!!!!!! and thanks

*please use both hands....*

[MadeinNZ]

Quote:

---

"More soon....I promise"

---

Hope so. Lovely chapter. The sneakiness of it just made it hotter.

------------------------------


"When someone falls for Willow, they stay fallen" - Normal Again

[katydid]

I have to agree with the overwhelming wow statements. Wow. Very very nice. Can't wait to read more...

--------------
She practically had genuine molded plastic stamped on her ass.

[xita]

Oh Athame, the kissing was soooo hot. That was the best kissing. The pressing of their bodies.. hmm oh yeah! That was a great take of WTWA. I can't wait for your take of NMR

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Willow: (to Tara) I could heal.

Tara: (to Willow)And we’re gone.

[Thanatopsis]

Very excellent. With the kissing and the pressing and the sneakiness. All good.

-----------------
Oh, trusty soda machine. I push you for root beer, you give me coke.

[KathleenWolf]

fantastic as always... the thick intensity just poured out of the words so much that when Anya could basically feel it in the air... I know I was agreeing with her



bravo

kathleen

"I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine."

[Blue Athame 1]

Good morning Kittens...and a fine morning it is. I woke to see that I pleased you and that has made me very happy indeed.



Puff- I put you in a poetic mood...oh yes...I like that. If you see our Dragon tell her I am waiting for some more of her sweet kisses. Say, did I remember to tell you that being at that the mansion generally means that there may be some smooching. Few kittens slip by unkissed...it is a delightful side-affect of the generalized delirium.



Drakkenfyre- Speaking of kisses....The Lady relaxes into the wings of her dragon lost in their kiss which moves in and out of days and nights. So easily she surrenders to the gentle dragon who holds her heart truly. Athame knows that with her dragon she is in one of the few places where she feels safe and understood.

Thanks Laura.....Joy (yes that is my name...and a sentiment as well).



LQ- Steamy my dear....I will show you steamy....don't toddle off to far...it is time to visit the maze with the Lady...lets get lost for a little while.



Xita- Have I pleased my Queen? I know that there may be a few kittens who are frustrated that I haven't moved our girls together faster. It is nice to hear that you like the slow deliberate way I keep moving them closer together. The effect in the end is to have them grow into a full blown blaze. As I suspect you already know....the hottest coals in the fire are the ones that have burned the longest. I know that I am soundly breaking the no metaphors just fucking credo that many kittens seem to like...I am all about metaphors. But that is not to say I can't do fucking...hopefully we can have our cake and eat it too...I can't think of a better breakfast...can you?



TareBearRS- Yes...I am moving them closer and closer. I am glad you like the behind the scenes action...hey...who needs Joss and ME anyway.



Rose- Thank you Rose, you are always such a nice support. I really like rewriting the episodes...I actually did not know I would like it so much...but as I have said before, it is great to be able to redo what should have been done by Joss and his minions in the first place.



Little M- Hey little M...glad to have you with us...are you going to stay for some drinks and naked kitten volleyball...come on in...here is a chair just for you.



Jennpurr- Oh a hug from my Jenn...how sweet...my day is starting off right now. You must never underestimate the power of a good kiss....never...they can be...well...come here...let me show you...it is easier to explain that way.



Thanatopsis- You like kissing, pressing and sneakiness huh?

I like the sneakiness too...adds to the excitement. Come on, grab your favorite kitten and meet me out on the lawn...I think it is time for some kissing games.



Katydid- Welcome....I am pleased you are liking this...care to join our little soiree?



eccentrictulip- Steamy...yes...trust me when I tell you how much I enjoyed writing it. Also trust me when I tell you that I am just getting warmed up.



Tiggrscorpio- Hi dear...thanks for all your support. Of course you are invited to the mansion....and there are some open spaces on the volleyball team. As the Lady of the house it is my duty to check out all the players to ensure their continued health and happiness...so if you see me looking ...I am just fulfilling my duty as a good hostess.

I am pleased you like the update...rewritten scenes while fulfilling can be a little risky because people tend to create their own versions of what went on...on the other hand it leaves a lot of grist for the mill.



Triscuit 7- Thanks Triscuit...I am doing a little balancing act here. I want that constant undercurrent of everlasting love mixed with a undeniable insatiable passion. It is nice to know I am hitting the mark.



MadeinNZ- I am so happy that I have pleased you. You are very sweet and must swing by the mansion. I am feeling better...much more like myself now. You are right about this being a fabulous community...they brought me back from the edge of my temporary insanity.

I promise more soon...hopefully later today.



Kathleen- Oh Kathleen...whats to say. You are so kind to me...so insightful too. I rely on your reassurances that I am using my words well....and that my construction is okay. I respect your writers eye and trust that you will tell me. You are right about me...I do pour myself into this which as we have seen can be a very dangerous proposition...having so much of myself exposed like that. I am not a cerebral writer...what you are getting is a lot of my heart. I considered in the beginning trying to develop a more intricate plot to hang the story on rather then having their relationship be the plot...that way I could have a few more external supports and buffers. I decided however to follow the old rule of writing which is to write what you know...so I am...what I know about is feelings...so that is what you all get....in stereo surround sound What I am trying to say is that you help me feel safe in that I am not getting to over the top. So much emotion can easily get muddy or overwhelming and I don't want to do that...I trust that you will tell me if I do. Thank you to you and Beth.

And....it would be my pleasure to see the spell of you and your beloved...I can think of no finer a gift then a rainbow in my garden created by the rainbow writers...I know all the kittens will be pleased.



Always,

Athame

Edited by: Blue Athame 1 at: 6/30/02 8:54:13 am

[Drakkenfyre]

My Lady, My Joy!!! Your kiss does leave this dragon weak!! Yet, Know that I will always protect you. Settle into my embrace and lean your head upon my shoulder and I shall whisper words of poetry and love!! I await your next story with great anticipation.

Always your dragon,

Drakkenfyre(Laura)

"In my world there are people in chains and we ride them like ponies."

[ExtraFlameyWT]

Athame,



You could never disappoint me...you are wonderful! Thank you for the update...I will be waiting patiently for more.



And I will try not to cause TOO much mischief..



Aimee

*****
"Pope John Paul today confirmed his opposition to gay marriages, said they're unnatural. Gay marriage is unnatural. Then he put on a pointy hat, his dress, and returned to never having sex at all." -Bill Maher

[Jennpurr]

Quote:

---

Jennpurr- Oh a hug from my Jenn...how sweet...my day is starting off right now. You must never underestimate the power of a good kiss....never...they can be...well...come here...let me show you...it is easier to explain that way.

---

Awwww... shucks



Ooohh **walks over to Athame** Show me, my good lady.



I'll be waiting patiently for that next update. I know you won't disappoint me. That could never happen.



**Waves at Aimee **

Jen

-----------------------------------


"Alyson Hannigan is a frickin' amazing kisser."Amber Benson

Edited by: Jennpurr  at: 6/30/02 11:03:03 am

[Blue Athame 1]

Spoiler Warning for Season 4..."New Moon Rising"



Title- Angels and Goddesses



Rating- A...for Angst, S...for Smoochies, C....for Cuddles.



Copyright Disclaimer- (This is their way of torturing us you know....)-All characters belong to Joss and ME.



Notes- I seem to be running out of things to say in my notes...oh well then...lets see what happens next.



************************************************************************



Chapter 8.....New Love Rising.



Oz.



Oz.



Oz.



Oz had returned and Willow stumbled.



Tara sat in silence, her knees drawn to her chest, her heart reflecting back the darkness of the night. She dared not indulge in the pain, she pushed it down, pushed it down, back to the hollow where it always lived.



She had had a moment of divinity. A kiss so sweet it could last a lifetime. Perhaps now it would have to. Tara took in a gulp of air and squeezed her legs in tighter.



"What hubris" she murmured chastising herself. What a delusion that she Tara Maclay could fly so close to the sun. It was fitting now that she would fall from the sky, her wings but wax, into the sea.



She took in another bit of air fighting back the almost unbearable grief now stalking her. She was familiar with the feeling, it was always there nibbling at her soul. Feeding on her since her mothers death, leaving an empty hole in the center of her being. Willow had begun to fill that place, to heal her with a love that brought both constancy and light.



Tara was prepared to let her go. She loved Willow so much that she wanted only her happiness. She sat in that night preparing for her sacrifice, knowing soon that Willow would come...and soon she did.



Tara felt the presence before she heard the knock. Burying her head in her knees she took in a final gulp of air steeling herself for what was to come. 'I must be strong,' she told herself rising to walk to the door, 'I must be strong for her.'



Willow stood with a candle, the light bouncing off her face highlighting her beauty. Tara's heart warmed and ached, she longed to reach out, to enfold Willow in her arms. She felt frozen, mute, numb. Willow was talking now but Tara could hardly hear. Willow's words had no sound against the screaming of Tara's breaking heart. Tara fought to squeeze out her words, her release of Willow. Blinded, she waited to hear what she knew would come, she waited for the blow of Willow's choice.



The candle flickered casting an eerie light on them both, showing them, revealing them. Willow looked into Tara's eyes and said the words.



"I am."



Tara's mind vibrated in recognition, her pulse quickened hearing the words that cut through the fog of her misery.



"You mean?" Tara was not yet sure she believed what she was hearing.



"I mean. Okay?"



"Oh yes" she breathed feeling her heart light. 'Me, she chose me.'



Willow was talking again, looking lovingly into Tara's eyes. Tara was struggling to the surface, trying to believe the truth in what was happening. She somehow answered Willow and blew out the candle which she vaguely remembered Willow offering earlier. It was all so surreal, she longed to feel her body again in this growing safety. She stood waiting unsure of what to do or say next, she was waiting for some part of her to engage. She was floating above the pain, soaring on the feeling of Willow there with her. How could it be that she was so close to the abyss only to be wrenched away by Willow's gentle words and a little candlelight.



Tara felt Willow take the candle from her grasp. As Willow bent and placed it on the floor next to them, Tara held her breath. The tension was beginning to dissipate as Tara watched Willow rise and felt the touch of Willow's cool fingers on her cheek.



"Tara..." Willow whispered "my Tara...I'm so sorry."



Tara turned and kissed the palm of the hand now cupping her face. She had no words as she was full, flooded, stalled. She could not think of the irony of the two of them there in the dark together. Together in the place where moments before Tara had surrendered her heart to live always alone, but now Willow had returned to light their way.



Another hand joined the first. Willow was holding Tara's face trying to draw her back in. "I love you Tara....I love you" she repeated emphatically.



Willow pressed her mouth to Tara's promising the truth in her words. Tara kissed her back fervently trying to ignore the cracks forming in the walls around her heart. She felt the pain begin to seep out as Willow's love tried to reach in. Tara reached for the strength to push it back yet again.



Willow was kissing her harder now and Tara could not help but respond. She was opening mutely, desperately grasping at Willow, hungry for her, hungry for them. Willow sensed Tara's need and pulled her closer, wrapping her in her arms and rocking her gently. Willow reached up and began to stroke Tara's hair. Tara had no idea that she could feel such pain and passion at the same time. She tugged at Willow pulling her closer, glancing her teeth off Willow's lips in the process.



Willow moaned and began to pull Tara towards the bed. Tara touched Willow's face, stroking her cheek. Willow found Tara's neck and throat, Tara's eyes closed involuntarily at the contact.



Willow continued to move Tara slowly, seeking her goal. She pushed Tara back onto the bed and then crawled on herself dropping her clogs in the process. Tara laid back her head on the pillow as Willow moved into her side and propped herself up on one elbow. Draping a leg over Tara's thigh Willow leaned in to examine Tara's face. Her fingers found their mark as she gently stroked them over Tara's brows, lips, and cheeks.



Tara needing more complete contact began to pull at Willow trying to draw her into her arms.



Willow's fingers left the face and dropped down to slide across Tara's stomach landing on her side to aide in pulling her closer so she and Tara could move more intimately together. Wrapping herself around Willow Tara clung to her, balling the fabric of her shirt into her fists.



Willow loved this new place. She loved the feel of Tara's want mistaking her growing desperation for passion. She found Tara's mouth yet again and kissed her deeply, pouring all her love into that sweet place.



Tara was breaking apart. She was losing the battle of control and was feeling a wave of anguish grow stronger inside her. She pulled Willow tighter trying to bury herself in the sensation of Willow's mouth and tongue. She wanted to hide in Willow's body, burrowing down, seeking safety there.



Willow began to kiss her way across Tara's cheek to the curve of her neck. Finding a place to nuzzle and rest, she began to worry it with her lips and tongue. "I love you, I love you, I love you" she purred into the tender skin.



Tara was coming unhinged now, a wave of sorrow pursuing her. The more she relaxed, the more she felt, the more she enjoyed, the more she released. Old wounds were blocking new joys. Willow's love was breaking her open, setting free her demons which were rising closer and closer to the surface.



She tried to say Willow's name but couldn't. She wanted to warn Willow but did not know how. She was quickly losing control, weakening with every kiss and caress.



Willow paused in her kisses...something was happening. She stilled her mouth and felt Tara's heartbeat on her lips. As she did she realized that something had shifted. Tara was still clutching her tightly but had become slower in her movements. Tara was hanging on, she was almost inert. Her breathing was erratic and there was a tension growing in her body.



Willow froze waiting, wondering what Tara wanted, what she needed, what she would do. Tara swallowed hard, then Willow felt the wetness on her cheek. Tara took in a huge breath of air and made a small noise turning herself to hide her face in Willow's hair.



Willow was confused and frightened. Tara had begun to cry, hard. Huge waves racked her body as she shook in Willow's arms, pouring out her grief into Willow's neck.



Willow felt panic rise in her throat. Guilt stung her and she too began to cry. Together they lay like that, tears flowing freely weeping one into the other.



Willow was the first to stop, feeling some relief from the pain of the last 24 hours. As she continued to hold Tara she began to feel her more clearly and completely. Opening her heart she began to realize that she was not the cause of Tara's tears, the catalyst perhaps but not the cause. She understood now, tightening her arms to take Tara in. Willow became a vessel for Tara's pain. No longer fighting against the sadness she let Tara cry until there were no more tears and Tara became limp, relaxing in Willow's loving embrace.



Willow moved now rubbing Tara's back to comfort, reminding her that she was there. Tara made a small sound against Willow's throat and flattened her palms against Willow's back releasing her shirt.



"W-W-Willow...I'm.."



"Shhh" Willow whispered cradling her "it's okay."



"I-I-I'm s-s-sorry W-W-Willow."



"Shhh" Willow said again "I know, I understand."



Tara sniffed needing to blow her nose...she was very tired. Willow rolled her gently onto her back and stretched over her to reach the nightstand. She watched as Tara blew her nose and moved to stroke the hair out of her face.



"I love you Tara."



"I love you W-W-Willow...so m-m-much."



"Shhh love, relax, its okay now."



Tara reached out to touch Willow's face.



"Not quite w-w-what you expected, huh?" said Tara forcing a smile.



"Actually if you think about it...it should be expected after all we've been through...I needed it too."



"It wasn't just you Willow"



"I know that, well I know that now, once I could calm down enough to feel you I understood."



Tara pulled Willow down into a kiss.



"We needed this" Willow said looking into Tara's eyes. "Come here" she said rolling onto to her back and pulling Tara into her shoulder.



"I don't want you to think I don't want you Willow" Tara sighed sleepily running a hand over Willow's torso.



"I know" Willow said smiling "but first things first."



Tara nestled into Willow. "I love you" she whispered.



"And I love you...." Willow stroked Tara's hand now resting on her stomach,"rest now baby...we have all the time in the world."



And so they did....with that....they slept.

************************************************************************Next Chapter....next week: Chapter 9 Angels and Goddesses.



Whew, that was a rough one.



Athame.

Edited by: Blue Athame 1 at: 7/2/02 5:30:35 am

[Drakkenfyre]

My lady, that was beautiful!! Let me hold you tight. Secure you in my embrace. Perhaps I should recite you a poem. Speak to you of happiness and love. Again, I bow before you in awe. You inspire this dragon beyond all words. I am humbled.

"In my world there are people in chains and we ride them like ponies."

[LeatherQueen]

Oh wow... Athame, there was so much pain and so much love in this one. So wonderful.



And I shant toddle off far. I would enjoy a nice walk in the maze with you. And steamy? I always look forward to steamy, my dear. I'll bring the Bailey's and meet you there.

--------------------------------


"But when they're playing your song on the jukebox in Hell, you might as well dance." - K. Simpson


"Futile... like a FOX, baby!" - Tara in The Late Shift by wiccachica

[ExtraFlameyWT]

My Lady, that was absolutely beautiful...so many emotions. I will continue to cause mischief as I wait for more...



*waves at Jen* Aren't you coming with me?



Aimee

*****
"Pope John Paul today confirmed his opposition to gay marriages, said they're unnatural. Gay marriage is unnatural. Then he put on a pointy hat, his dress, and returned to never having sex at all." -Bill Maher

[Jennpurr]

I'd love to come with you, Aimee. Where are we going?



Athame,



Lovely update. Awww... Poor Tara. Glad Willow was there to comfort her though. I like your take on how the episode went after she blew out the candle. Very beautiful.



Thanks,

Jen



Looking forward to whatever's next.

-----------------------------------


"Alyson Hannigan is a frickin' amazing kisser."Amber Benson

[Tiggrscorpio]

Athame, this was completely different for what I was expecting, and an absolutely realistic portrayal of how the evening could have passed. They way you wrote Tara's breakthrough was simply stunning. Thanks for sharing!

*****

She's my everything!

[MadeinNZ]

Fantastic. That was a totally new look at what happened post NMR. Can't wait for the next update.

------------------------------


"When someone falls for Willow, they stay fallen" - Normal Again

[Jennpurr]

Hee hee... nope, we would never be anything more than good.



**Walks over to Aimee and takes her hand, pulling her away** Come on, let's go be good.



Jen

-----------------------------------


"Alyson Hannigan is a frickin' amazing kisser."Amber Benson

[ExtraFlameyWT]

Hehe...*runs along with Jen* We're being very good.



Aimee

*****
"Pope John Paul today confirmed his opposition to gay marriages, said they're unnatural. Gay marriage is unnatural. Then he put on a pointy hat, his dress, and returned to never having sex at all." -Bill Maher

[Jennpurr]

So, Aimee, what ever shall we do while we are being good? Hmm?



**Thinks**



Jen

-----------------------------------


"Alyson Hannigan is a frickin' amazing kisser."Amber Benson

Edited by: Jennpurr  at: 6/30/02 4:35:03 pm

[ExtraFlameyWT]

I think we should tease other kittens...what do you think?



Aimee

*****
"Pope John Paul today confirmed his opposition to gay marriages, said they're unnatural. Gay marriage is unnatural. Then he put on a pointy hat, his dress, and returned to never having sex at all." -Bill Maher

[Drakkenfyre]

Tease all you want Aimee, my girl, I shall stand by the lady while you go forth and achieve great mischief.

"In my world there are people in chains and we ride them like ponies."

[Blue Athame 1]

"You take such good care of me my lovely dragon." Athame leans contentedly against her dragon love dreaming of dragon kisses.



As for the girls...."off with you you little vixens...go find some mischief and liven up this party." Athame winks and waves her hand falling back into her dragon's embrace.

[LeatherQueen]

LQ shoos Aimee and Jen out of the room, "Don't worry, my lady, I'll lead them off to do mischief elsewhere. You enjoy some relaxing time with your dragon."



C'mon you two, let's go get this party started. Bailey's anyone?

--------------------------------


"But when they're playing your song on the jukebox in Hell, you might as well dance." - K. Simpson


"Futile... like a FOX, baby!" - Tara in The Late Shift by wiccachica

[Drakkenfyre]

My lady, these are the moments that I treasure. To hold you, feel you against me. I know that I have achieved peace!! Now place your head upon my shoulder again, my lady. I shall tell you a story. Rest easy!! It is a story of love!! A love for a maiden fair and her dragon. *Drakkenfyre wraps her wings around the lady in a tight embrace. With a gentle kiss upon the lips the dragon settles in for a long night*

"In my world there are people in chains and we ride them like ponies."

[Blue Athame 1]

"Ohhhhhhh.......mmmmmm"

[Drakkenfyre]

My lady, I am always here to grant your every wish and desire. All you need to do is whisper it in my ear. I have missed you my lady. I am glad that you have returned. I know that I must share you with the other kittens. I will do my best not to be jealous, but, you know us dragon we are rather hot blooded and protective!! *Drakkenfyre slowly strokes the cheek of the lady* I will do as you bid me do..

"In my world there are people in chains and we ride them like ponies."